'What is it about humans that urges them seek out so many endeavors in order to feed their desires? Greed, power, family, friends, philosophy, knowledge; infinite goals and infinite reasons behind them. Whoever or whatever created these beings are either cunning; to create self motivating creatures that will constantly push the limits of what's possible, or downright cruel; never truly allowing them to feel true fulfillment or satisfaction. The point is humans were created with a void, a missing piece left intentionally empty never to be filled, an undying hunger.'
A bit grim right? The names Rodney, and in case you're wondering, this is the story of my life. A life of Magic, Gods, and regrettably, Ponies. Yeah, freakin-multi-techno-collored-goody-ponies.
But it's not all bad really, got way healthier with a more green diet. Though the lack of meat can be painful at times, that one landed me in less than desired situations. I get to screw with innocent ponies on a regular basis. Didn't kill myself or everyone else with me either. So not a bad deal really, even ended up retiring as teacher.
Teen for language and some adult themes.
This takes place before season 3.
HIATUS: Currently at a programmer's boot camp. Will be done late June 2015.
AN: If you can see past my cruddy writing skills there's plenty to tickle your funny bones, I hope. First attempt at writing a fic.
49 Chapters:
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Prologue [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jan 25th, 2015
695
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Chapter 1 - "Dafuq!?" [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jan 25th, 2015
4,847
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Chapter 2 - The good stuff. [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 22nd, 2012
1,978
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Chapter 3 - Mine does magic. [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 6th, 2012
3,875
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Chapter 4 - The song of my people [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 2nd, 2012
3,358
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Chapter 5 - The one with stars on her butt [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jun 18th, 2013
4,709
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Chapter 6 - Is that pony waving at me? [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 19th, 2012
2,787
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Chapter 7 - I do NOT have a fetish for ponies! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 22nd, 2012
4,426
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Chapter 8 - Death by gay snu-snu [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 24th, 2012
3,426
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Chapter 9 - It was all her idea! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 25th, 2012
2,867
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Chapter 10 - You'll never take me alive [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 28th, 2012
4,683
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Chapter 11 - Oh it is on like Donkey Kong [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 26th, 2012
3,157
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Chapter 12 - Incoming D'awwwnuke! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Mar 10th, 2013
3,847
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Chapter 13 - A purple unicorn and a naked human [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 25th, 2012
3,548
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Chapter 14 - Look at the size of that thing [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 24th, 2012
3,669
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Chapter 15 - Why aren'tya in a zoo? [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 25th, 2012
4,497
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Chapter 16 - Ponies aren't so innocent after all [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 21st, 2012
4,626
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Chapter 17 - She's into it like Rarity [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 18th, 2012
4,427
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Chapter 18 - I guess these ponies aren't so bad after all [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 22nd, 2012
3,664
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Chapter 19 - There's a troll I need to deal with [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 24th, 2012
2,532
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Chapter 20 - It appears you have quite a knack with children [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 19th, 2013
2,613
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Chapter 21 - Is that what I look like when I do it? [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 3rd, 2012
3,640
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Chapter 22 - Add bacon strips add bacon strips add bacon strips [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 8th, 2012
3,314
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Chapter 23 - WE GOT BEER PEOPLE!! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 25th, 2012
11,899
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Chapter 24 - I got close to her goods and lived to tell about it. [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Oct 10th, 2012
7,170
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Chapter 25 - The Star of Rodney [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Oct 29th, 2012
5,893
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Chapter 26 - It's a human thing, get used to it [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Nov 21st, 2012
7,425
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Chapter 27 - You'd know if I wanted to flirt with you [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Dec 11th, 2012
3,326
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Chapter 28 - Oo~oh I miss this taste! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Dec 21st, 2012
5,390
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Chapter 29 - HE'S MINE!! [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jan 8th, 2013
5,108
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Chapter 30 - Daddy [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jan 22nd, 2013
7,659
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Chapter 31 - Leave them to die [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Mar 3rd, 2013
8,902
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Chapter 32 - Let's see how annoying I can get [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
May 3rd, 2013
18,566
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Chapter 33 - I'm home [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Apr 25th, 2013
2,052
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Chapter 34 - Sorrow and loss [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
May 7th, 2013
5,031
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Chapter 35 - Haflax [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jun 17th, 2013
7,613
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Chapter 36 - Well that escalated quickly (with Q&A) [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 26th, 2013
7,858
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Chapter 37 - Found you [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Sep 26th, 2013
6,132
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Chapter 38 - I know you want this [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Mar 10th, 2015
3,038
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Halloween Special [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Dec 19th, 2013
7,080
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Chapter 39 - Time to play another game [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Dec 23rd, 2013
7,069
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Chapter 40 - Jo [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jul 23rd, 2014
10,042
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A very special chapter [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Mar 29th, 2014
1,509
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Chapter 41 - One day you'll find out [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Feb 15th, 2015
9,249
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Chapter 42 - All so easy [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jun 29th, 2014
5,662
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Chapter 43 - If you do that with a pie... [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Aug 14th, 2014
7,322
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Chapter 44 - Fancy meeting you here [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Dec 7th, 2014
9,515
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Chapter 45 - Scatterbrained [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Jan 22nd, 2015
5,895
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Chapter 46 - I dun goofed [Fimfiction.net] [Cache]
Mar 4th, 2015
6,746