Twilight Sparkle, M.D.
Ponyville Hospital, Day 31, sunrise

Where do I belong?

I’ve been trying to outrun that question all morning, but then again, I’ve never been the best athlete to begin with. In the meantime, like always, I choose to distract myself with other activities--waking up before Scarlet to check out the breakfast bar, stopping by the CanterCon information booth, anything to keep my mind off it. Anything to keep me from staring out the window, towards the place that I once called home.

I don’t often indulge in fairy tales, but I’ve heard enough of them to know what happens when outside creatures get trapped in our realm. The only reason they stay in Equestria is because there is no other way to get back--villainous ponies destroy their magic, steal it, to the point where there is no escape. These ponies believe that someday, the creature they’ve captured will forget their home and stay in Equestria forever and out of that foolishness, they return their magic. And that, above all, is the true danger of looking back to a place you once called home.

Just one look, and you’re compelled to leave everything behind. Before, I would have considered the citizens of Ponyville no different from the evil sorcerers in those stories--ponies who’d conspired against me and trapped me. I don’t feel like I’ve changed that much since then.

So why am I suddenly so afraid of staying here?

With an annoyed sigh, I realize yet again that these thoughts are useless. Scarlet wants me to decide in the next couple of weeks or so, not immediately. Nopony, no matter how cruel, would expect such a thing, and I know for a fact she is as far from cruel as a seapony is from a dragon. Scolding myself for even thinking about the situation, I take a flyer from the information desk and prepare myself for the best first date a pony could ever have.

The flyer is surprisingly large, almost a booklet in its own right, but even that doesn’t deter me. With newfound confidence, I set off to create the perfect plan for our trip, one that involves hitting off all of Scarlet’s interests while still giving us enough time to promote Fluttershy’s manga.

Which is good, because other than the things Scarlet talks about, I have no clue what this whole “manga” thing is all about.

As I trot through our hotel hallway with my booklet in tow, I realize that at least half of the panel topics are about things I’ve never heard of. (Actually, now that I think about it, “half” might actually be a generous estimate.) I can understand most of the things about magical filly manga and Fillita from experience, some ideas about comedy and romance manga, some cultural Neighponese concepts, and everything else is a blur. The blurbs about the panels are enough to clear up some things--like how yuri isn’t really something to be discussed on any first date, let alone one between two mares--but other than that, everything else might as well have been in another language.

A feeling of dread creeps up my spine, and I can suddenly imagine Scarlet roping me into a round of manga trivia just so she can tease me about it later. Yet another reason why I feel the need to plan all this in advance.

More importantly, if I can do this for her, maybe she’ll be convinced that I really am serious about all this. If anything, maybe it’ll even convince myself.

As I open the door to our room and see Scarlet sleeping just across from me, one last set of questions forms in my mind.

Is home always the place where you grew up, or can it be someplace else? Does it always have to be a place at all, or can it be a pony?

The more I run from these questions, it seems, the more they catch up to me.

Twilight Sparkle, M.D.
Ponyville Hospital, Day 31, early morning

One hour. That’s how long it takes for my old life here to catch up to me. One freakin’ hour.

After running my plans past Scarlet, we’ve decided to check out the booths before too many ponies choose to hit them up. Sure enough, just like Fluttershy told me, nopony’s really picked through any of the merchandise yet, so I’ve still got a fair chance at a Healer Moonlight figure. Or, at the very least, one of the other Healers Scarlet likes. True to fangirl fashion, asking her to name one favorite character is like pulling teeth from a manticore.

Fluttershy isn’t expecting us for another couple hours, and we’re only expected to work an hour at her booth, anyway. Most of the panels before noon didn’t seem interesting to me, and to my surprise, they weren’t all that interesting to Scarlet either. So that leaves us with more booth time than either of us can possibly have anything to do with.

Thankfully, we fill in those gaps pretty well. Scarlet isn’t really familiar with anything outside of magical filly manga, so we traverse the stands and come up with our own stories of what sorts of characters the various figures could be. At first, we’re fairly serious about it, making guesses based off clothing and muscle structure and all that happy stuff. Then we go straight into imagining the bulkiest warriors as doctors, all that sort of thing. It doesn’t last long, because one of the artists heckles us about it, and honestly, I almost want to heckle myself for it, too.

The premier doctor in all of Canterlot, fooling around on a date like any old teenager. Yet another thing that would’ve horrified me a month ago, but something that strangely...doesn’t now. Just like how, every time I look outside at the landscape, everything just seems wrong.

I tell myself that Canterlot is a big city, that this is a part of town I was never really familiar with. But even now, I’m not sure that’s true. It’s like the capital itself has morphed into something I can’t recognize.

Scarlet probably senses my sudden silence, because she suddenly starts prattling about Skipper Sun, something that I vaguely recognize as a magical filly series but otherwise know nothing about. From the way she talks about it, I feel like I’d be kicked out of this convention for admitting that.

It takes me about halfway between “Skipper Sun revolutionized the concept of magical fillies as warriors” and “vintage magical filly series used music-based magic to take down villains” to realize she’s lecturing to hide something else. I try to ease into it the best way she can, since she never reveals anything right away.

“So they sing the enemy to death? Really? Glad I got in when I did, then.”

Scarlet quickly clears her throat, something that almost makes me think she’s out of fangirl mode. Sure enough, there’s a serious glint in her eyes, the kind I only see in the emergency room.

“They’re not as bad as they sound!” she asserts. “Any unicorn worth her salt would know that a strong enough voice can work as great as any spell. Other than that one ill-advised singing seapony manga that came out a few years back, idol MFs are some of the best in the genre!”

I wisely choose to assume that “MFs” is an acronym for “magical fillies” in this context, but it still takes everything I have not to laugh at that last statement.

It’s official, I think to myself. Imagining Scarlet swearing is my maturity’s one weakness.

“Or at least that’s what people who’ve read them have told me,” Scarlet continues. “Unfortunately, they’re out of print and beyond a Ponyville doctor’s salary.”

We keep on like this for another few moments before she finally admits what’s wrong--she starts talking about how out of line she got last night. That she expected too much of me, that I don’t have to decide between hospitals right away. That she, more than anypony, ought to know how hard transferring from one place to another could be.

I should say something grand and romantic after that, about how I would willingly leave everything behind for her. It’s not what I feel, not yet at least, but it’d give her some peace of mind, at least. Unfortunately, just like always, my mouth isn’t quite in line with what I want.

“We’ll talk about it later,” I whisper. When Scarlet’s face turns indignant, I continue, “The director wants us to be undercover, remember? Canterlot National is the biggest hospital in the country, and it’s really not a good idea to let them know we’re taking patients on their turf--”

Before I can say anything else, though, I notice somepony running towards us out of the corner of my eye. She’s a yellow blur, galloping so fast that no normal pony would be able to pick her out. But I’ve seen this exact scene happen enough times to know our cover’s officially been blown. And sure enough, the pony in my memories is every bit as energetic as the one heading straight towards us.

“Dr. Shimmer, you’re needed in room five.”

“On it!”

Nopony really knows what Doctor Sunset Shimmer has been through, but apparently, it was enough to almost get her kicked out of medical school. Even when I was at Canterlot National, it was a subject of endless gossip. All we really knew was that somehow or another, Director Celestia intervened and got her on the right track, and now she has the luxury of never revealing whether she got her speed from running track or running from the cops. She shadowed me for a while, but even then, I never really got to know her. And now, she’s replaced me as the director’s favorite.

My brain basically translates all these facts into “stand your ground immediately.” So, I push in front of Scarlet, realizing too late that my authentic Fillita petticoat is blocking the whole vendor aisle. Judging from the determined look on Sunset’s face, though, I decide to tackle the Canterlot National issue first and apologize to the annoyed sellers later.

Sure enough, though, Sunset happens to be the one to tackle me. With the raging fury of a million stars, you might ask, like any reasonably competitive director’s-favorite would do? No.

With a hug.

“How did you get here?” she asks me without a hint of anger in her voice. “I thought you were over in Ponyville.”

“I am,” I try to explain, “but our director didn’t think anypony from Canterlot National would be on duty here.”

“I didn’t think anypony still glomped at conventions! The patients I’ve talked to said they stopped doing that years ago.”

Both Sunset and I take a few steps away from Scarlet as if to say, “I have no idea what you’re saying, and I really don’t want to know.” From what I can tell, she seems to get the message.

“Directors can be like that sometimes,” Sunset says with a sigh. “Celestia only assigned me to this shift a couple of days ago, and we’re pretty short-hoofed as it is. I guess that’s what happens when you start banishing ponies to the nearest small town.”

She shrugs as if that last statement was nothing more than a casual remark, but even if I’m not good at reading ponies, I can tell it was far from that. If she hadn’t hugged me the way she did, I almost would’ve thought it was another barb, the type Canterlot National doctors exchanged behind closed doors. That almost would have been easier for me to understand than what she’s about to do now.

“I’m not going to report you or anything,” she continues. “But there’s one thing you do need to know. Nopony really agrees with that decision Director Celestia made. They think she had it in for you. And as much as I’ve been fighting for that position...it’s useless without you there. You’re the one who’s kept me in check all these years.”

Kept me in check? That’s the first I’ve ever heard about that. As great as it is to hear that the ponies from my old hospital miss me, that gets to me like nothing else. Doctor Shimmer doesn’t usually act like this. But then again, Doctor Sparkle doesn’t usually hang out at conventions, either.

“Our hospital deserves to have more than one great doctor. Canterlot National needs you.”

And so, I spend the rest of the day avoiding that message, doing everything I can to keep Scarlet from seeing the figure I eventually find. From seeing my conflict. Keeping both of us from seeing Doctor Shimmer again and throwing everything into confusion.

It goes pretty well for most of the day, and into the night. And that’s when, suddenly, a stallion hits the dance floor and trips on his cape.

Twilight Sparkle, M.D.
Ponyville Hospital, Day 31, late night

If there’s one thing today’s taught me, it’s that cons are fairly uneventful. Did my old coworker just beg me to come back? Yes. Did Scarlet ask me if Doctor Shimmer and I had ever been particularly intimate. Absolutely. But it also happened to be a day full of food, fun, and art, with Fluttershy’s stand being the most uneventful thing of all. At the end of the day, she told us she’d earned more than enough money to take her idea to a professional publisher.

At the end of the day, nothing can prepare you for a con rave. Nothing.

Dances like this happen every weekend, deep in the back alleys of Canterlot. I’ve mainly heard about them through the medical gossip grapevine, since I’m not technically qualified to deal with some of the crazy stuff that goes on there. From what I’ve heard, ponies take over abandoned warehouses and bring all their buddies in for an extravaganza that goes long into the night. If it was just ponies dancing and waving around glowsticks, there wouldn’t be a problem, but lately, drugs have gotten into the mix, too. The thought of the con putting on something like this, needless to say, is enough to send a shiver down my spine.

Fortunately, the con staff is one step ahead of me, and checks just about everypony at the door to make sure this rave won’t get out of hoof. Foals from the con are still allowed to attend this event, though I question the types of parents who let their kids stay up and do the most hyper activity imaginable at these hours. Unfortunately, the lack of drugs doesn’t make the situation any less weird.

The convention pamphlet I got explains that these sorts of dances originated from masquerade balls, the type nobles hold in Canterlot to this day. Except, instead of ornately decorated masks, ponies are dancing in just about every type of costume imaginable, to some of the loudest and most obnoxious music I’ve ever heard. Just about every inch of this room is covered in neon lights, and I have to shield my eyes just to get into the place.

Ten minutes into the rave, one of the panelists comes in and announces that he’s taking free art requests in the other room. At least twenty ponies rush out of the room and nearly mow him over, and I don’t think it’s because they want their characters drawn.

“Is this what having a migraine feels like?” I eventually ask Scarlet.

“What?” she yells at me, even though I’ve got to be less than a few feet away.

“Is this what having a migraine feels like?”

“I’m having a good time, how about you?”

Realizing there’s no way in Tartarus anypony can carry on a conversation here, I go back to patrolling the area. Which is easier said than done when the room changes color every thirty seconds. Thankfully, I don’t have to dance, though I’m not sure how much more of this racket I can take.

Doctors have kind of a love-hate relationship with loud noises. While you have to get used to things like beeping and drilling, you also have to lecture your patients about the dangers of loud music and early-onset deafness. So, perhaps needless to say, we don’t exactly go around clubbing too often.

As I inspect the room for any public health hazards that aren’t directly associated with the rave environment, I try to take my mind off the situation. I estimate just how many decibels this music is putting out and whether or not it’s really a danger to hearing. Every once in awhile, I stop what I’m doing and just listen to the music, though it isn’t really to my taste. In any case, time seems to run incredibly slowly and incredibly quickly at the same time, which is something I can’t even pretend to understand.

A couple hours into it, I notice a dark stallion wearing a velvet cape. He looks so much like the pictures I’ve seen of King Sombra that it almost scares me out of the room. Putting aside those childish fears, I come in closer, realizing that his cape is far too long for him. I’m no Rarity, but I’m smart enough to know that he should have hemmed it before the con. And so, what happens next is almost inevitable.

I close in on him, so close I can see sweat drip down his face. He dances for a few more moments, so frenetically that I swear he’s wearing cursed shoes. And then, all of a sudden, he stops in his tracks.

A few ponies gather, assuming that he’s only tripped. But as they take in the scene, they slowly realize that he isn’t waking up. I can’t hear the murmurs over the music, but I can imagine what they’re thinking: the absolute worst.

Thankfully, even though I’ve never been on duty at a dance, I know enough about this issue to make a clear diagnosis. A similar thing happened at a Canterlot music festival a few years back, where a dancer got so absorbed by the music that she didn’t even realize she was pushing her body to its limit. Places like this can be heatstroke breeding grounds, especially when you’ve got an impossibly thick cape over your back.

I bite down the urge to call the stallion an idiot and reach inside my first-aid bag. I’m grateful he’s still out, because medical kits just look like any old Fillita bag here, and that’d probably make him more than a little confused. As I rummage through it, I find that the only heatstroke remedy I packed is something that would probably get me a hoof in the face under any other circumstances. But, then again, heatstroke is one of the few conditions that doesn’t care about bedside manner.

I pull out an absurdly overpriced bottle of water I bought at the concession stand earlier and pour it all over the guy. While I’m at it, I figure I’ll try to take his cape off so he doesn’t overheat more than he already has.

Scarlet and Sunset have the rest covered, to my complete and utter surprise. As I keep splashing him with water, I see that they’ve somehow found the nearest stretcher, and the more I think about it, the more I wonder how long Sunset’s been in on this. Did she notice this guy right when I did?

Anyway, the two doctors get over their whole competing-hospitals thing surprisingly quickly and hoist him straight on. I take one side, and in barely a minute’s time, we’re out of that horrible room--hopefully, for good.

“Quick thinking, Doctor Sparkle,” Sunset says to me. It’s probably the first thing I’ve been able to hear all night. “Tell me Canterlot National doesn’t need something like that.”

I move as fast as I can, ignoring her, ignoring everything. I know Sunset means well, that she has to have some sort of agenda behind getting me to come back, but now I realize it’s worked all too well.

Scarlet glances at me in her usual fashion, the serious stare of a doctor on the line of duty. But I know it won’t last, because I know where the nearest hospital is. I thought I could come to Canterlot without facing my past, but I was wrong, so wrong.

Why is that such a bad thing? I ask myself. This is just like what Scarlet did. I’m going into my old hospital, saving a patient, proving myself. And then everything can go back to normal, just like it did with her.

I can feel the Healer Moonlight figure inside my medical bag, weighing against me like I’m holding Equestria itself in my hooves. Instead of remembering all the times I’ve spent traveling this very street, somehow, all I can see are memories of Ponyville, memories of today. And suddenly, I feel like I can’t understand anything, even myself.

Maybe that’s why I became a doctor in the first place. Because whenever you allow yourself to focus too much on anything, a patient’s always in need of saving. Because, sometimes, that patient is the only thing you can understand.

I wish I could go beyond that. I wish I could understand everything and stay that way, that I could know the world and know that nothing else could ever disrupt that knowledge. I wish I knew why, when I see that hospital coming into my sight, I’m not relieved.

Canterlot National is everything I’ve ever worked for, the place I’ve wanted to stay for my whole life. It’s everything I’ve fought for in Ponyville, the one good thing I remember as I fade off to sleep. It’s everything that makes Doctor Sparkle, well, Doctor Sparkle. But that’s not how I feel as I finally reach it, that’s not how I should feel...

I wish I could understand why finally seeing it again made me want to cry.

Author's Notes:

And so, that concludes the convention arc! I low-key want to give all the parts in the next arc TV Tropes titles...

Also, because I know fans are going to worry about this: Sunset Shimmer is not an antagonist in this fic. She doesn't realize she's getting in the way of Twilight/Scarlet. She's just a newer doctor who wants her senpai to come back, that's all.

P.S. More than a few occurences in this chapter are taken from my personal con experiences. At MWBF (Midwest Bronyfest), the art requests often took place during the rave (in a quiet room that was much more to my liking), and a Sombra cosplayer almost tripped on his cape. I embellished that last one a bit because I saw Incredibles 2 twice this month and figured that merited a few in-story "no capes" references.