It was 2:15 on a Monday afternoon, and Dean Cadance Amore already wanted the week to be over.

It wasn’t that she didn’t enjoy her job. In fact, most of the time, she absolutely loved it: she’d put herself through college and grad school for the chance to foster a love of learning and a sense of empathy in people. She knew most of her colleagues would say “kids,” but Cadance never let herself forget that they were people, and more intelligent and complex than adults gave them credit for.

No, what made Cadance wish she had a good vice to sink into was the people her own age that she had to work with. Sometimes she swore their job descriptions had to be “roadblock.” There was never enough for whatever she was trying to push through: enough money, enough people, enough responsibility, and stars forbid she suggest that the students were capable enough to run the thing themselves.

She was about to slam the drawer full of files shut in frustration, but a knock at her office door made her pause and shut it gently instead. “Come in,” she said, loosening the ponytail she kept her hair in. If they wanted to see her after school hours, they could deal with her looking a little less formal.

To her surprise, it wasn’t Cinch that opened the door, or even a Crystal Prep student. Instead, she found herself greeting three young women: an amber one whose name had something to do with the sun, an incredibly pink one who brightened the room just by walking into it, and-

“Twilight!” Cadance jumped up from behind her desk, grinning hugely, and embraced her former student. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! How have you been doing at Canterlot High?” She realized she was ignoring the other two, and let go to somewhat sheepishly include them in the conversation. “Forgive me, I don’t think I remember your names...?”

“I’m Sunset Shimmer, and that’s Pinkie Pie,” the amber one said. She smiled at Twilight, and it only took a second for Cadance to pick up on the subtext. Internally, she grinned in glee. That was so cute!

Externally, she said, “Well, not that I’m going to turn down a chance to see Twilight and her friends, but what are you all doing here? None of you attend Crystal Prep.”

“We need an adult,” Pinkie Pie announced.

Cadance had about two seconds to suddenly become concerned, before Sunset put a hand to her face and sighed. “No, Pinkie. Not like that.”

The three of them looked at each other, deciding something, and Sunset stepped to the front of the group. “Okay. This is gonna sound a little weird, but hear us out before you jump to any conclusions?”

Cadance eyed each other them in turn before she finally nodded. “I can at least give you the benefit of the doubt.”

Sunset took a deep breath. “Thank you. So, Twilight and I talked about this on the way over, and we agreed that we should at least give you the option of plausible deniability. I promise that nothing we’re doing is illegal, harmful, or has any potential to hurt you or anyone else. But Pinkie’s right, no one will take us seriously the way they would if we were ten years older.”

Cadance narrowed her eyes and sat back down. This didn’t sound like a petition for an after-school club, and she got the sense that something much bigger than these three girls was going on. At the same time.... “What do you need?” she asked, careful not to imply anything with the question.

Sunset’s demeanor changed subtly. Cadance watched something in her eyes and the lift of her chin turn from unsure to calculating. To her surprise, instead of making her wary, she felt as though she was now on solid ground. Whatever this was, they had it well in hand.

“We need someone who’s willing to negotiate on our behalf with corporations. We need someone we can trust to do what we need them to with a lot of money, someone who’s good at reading social situations, and someone who’s not going to ask too many questions.”

Cadance held up a hand. “I’ll help you,” she said, “but I want to know exactly what’s going on and what I’m getting into here.”

Twilight spoke up. “Are you sure?”

Cadance, still looking at Sunset, nodded. Sunset gave her a long look, and eventually said, “Twilight, can you show her?”

Twilight closed her eyes.

Cadance watched, open-mouthed, as everything on her desk began to float, bathed in a rosy purple light. The pencils she kept in a mug lifted themselves out of their bundle and lined themselves up in order of height in front of her. Slowly, the floating objects drifted downwards until they rested, one by one, on the wood surface. The only sound was the quiet clink of her now-empty mug against the desk.

Twilight opened her eyes, a little bashfully. Cadance stared at her.

Pinkie, naturally, broke the silence. “Ooh, ooh, can I go next? I wanna show off too!”

“No,” both Sunset and Twilight said, emphatically and not a little horror-stricken. “She explodes things,” Sunset explained.

“Just sugary things!” Pinkie protested.

Cadance decided that was one problem too many to worry about, and let it go.

“So... yeah,” Sunset said. “Magic is real. It’s a little more complicated than that, but...”

“I was there at the Friendship Games,” Cadance said softly. She looked down at the pencils in front of her without really seeing them. “I... I don’t know what I thought it was. A - a prank, or.... Everything just went back to normal, so I never....” She looked back at Twilight. “I’m so sorry. I should have asked you if you were okay. Hell, I should have asked you anything.”

“It’s okay,” Twilight said, just as subdued. “I mean, it - I wasn’t, but Midnight Sparkle is gone now. I’m in control, and-” She couldn’t keep a grin hidden anymore. “-magic is pretty great.”

“Friendship lasers,” Sunset confirmed, offering her hand for a high-five. Twilight, who wasn’t looking at her, missed it, but Pinkie more than made up the difference.

“Anyway,” Sunset said, shaking out her stinging hand, “there’s a lot to fill you in on, but the really short version is that we found an ancient magical artifact that guards against evil beings and we need an income to maintain it. We can’t exactly ask the government about it without being dragged off to a lab full of red tape, but we do have some ideas, and that’s what we need your help for. If you don’t like it later once you’ve heard the whole thing, you can say no, but....”

“You don’t think I will,” Cadance finished. “If nothing else, my curiosity is piqued.” She stood, dumped the pencils back in their mug, and grabbed her purse. “Well?”

“You’re in?”

“I’m in. Lead the way.”

Comparatively, bolstering the fledgling Society’s numbers was significantly less nerve-wracking. Sunset just showed up to the next fetish workshop the local kink group was hosting and gave them the elevator speech. She’d gotten it down to a science after realizing that Cadance was by far not the last person she was going to run this spiel past.

“Is this like that thing with the plant lady?” someone asked. She didn’t know his name, but he’d been on the Camp Everfree trip.

Sunset opened her mouth. Shut it. Thought for a second. “...Technically, no?”

“Plant lady?” Autumn asked.

“Look,” Sunset said, trying to get the conversation back on track before she lost control of it completely, “what I’m saying is, I have a space dedicated to kink. It’s clean, it’s huge, it’s got everything you’d ever want in it, and it’s about as private as you can get without going to the moon. Everyone who wants to check it out, follow me.”

Supposedly, all seven of them were meant to be at the Clocktower on Friday nights. In theory, this usually involved Sunset and Twilight just staying after school, while the others went home to do chores (Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash, much to the latter’s aggravation), freshen up (Rarity), or for some reason complete what little homework had been assigned three weeks before graduation (Pinkie Pie). In practice, almost nobody got there on time, and Sunset and Twilight spent enough time fooling around in the proto-lab that she wasn’t surprised to see Applejack and Rainbow Dash lounging around by the Fire.

“Where’s everyone else?” Sunset asked, then considered the possible answers to that question. “Please tell me the answer isn’t one-hundred percent ‘tentacles.’”

“Fluttershy’s in there-” Applejack waved a hand. “-talkin’ to the thing.”

“Like you do,” Rainbow snarked.

“And I’m not real sure what all Pinkie’s up to but she keeps running in and outta here with - yep, like that.”

They turned to see Pinkie streak into the room wearing two masks, a collar, and two sets of wrist cuffs, not a single one of which matched in either style or color. “Guess what I found!”

“I’m gonna go with the collar and mask machines,” Sunset deadpanned.

“How’d you know?”

“What’d you do with the list of colors and crap?” Rainbow asked.

Sunset pointed at the temporary “information board” they’d set up - really a whiteboard mounted on an easel Fluttershy had found at a yard sale. The pamphlets that Sunset had brought back from Equestria East were stuck on it with scotch tape.

Rainbow snagged the one titled “Collar Coding for Newbies” and held it up in front of her, glancing between it and Pinkie Pie, who struck a pose.

“According to this, you’re... straight, gay, bi, married, in a relationship, dating casually, not attached to anyone, okay with fucking random people, not okay with fucking random people, okay with it as long as they ask first, into noncon play, into gentle lovey-dovey stuff, into getting trained, and you work as a maid. Also, you’re three different people.”

Pinkie cocked her head. “That sounds about right.”

Applejack put a hand to her forehead. “Rarity’s decided today’s the day she’s gonna make us all uniforms or whatever, so she’s getting her sewing stuff and bringing Cadance with her. Hey, Twilight.”

Twilight joined the group after blinking at Pinkie Pie for a second or two, and nodded in greeting.

“Hey, wait a minute,” Rainbow said, frowning at the color list. “How come there’s only things for straight, gay, and bi?”

“What else is there?” Rarity asked.

“I’m ace,” Rainbow pointed out, and then, seeing a couple confused looks, “Asexual. It stands for 'awesome'. Ugh, just ask Fluttershy, she can explain it better than me.”

Twilight hummed. “Come to think of it, it’s a little strange that the color codings are for orientation, rather than object of attraction. Even without getting into the five or six axes of sex and gender, it’s not hard to simply misread someone’s appearance, and since these are meant to be a visual shortcut, that seems important.”

For a speech on a subject most people knew nothing about, she delivered it in quite the offhand tone. “What?” she said, to the resulting stares. “I do my research.”

“Thirty-five of the eighteen hundred sixty-four people that attend our school are nonbinary,” Pinkie said casually.

“And you just... know that,” Sunset said, after a short silence.

“Yep!”

“Off the top of your head.”

“Uh-huh! And if you include everyone who’s gender-nonconforming it’s two hundred and thirteen,” she added, as if this wasn’t an incredibly strange fact to easily reference.

Sunset stared at her, and decided this was another piece of information to file in the Box of Things Pinkie Pie Does That I Don’t Question Too Hard. “Oookay. Well, it’s not like we can’t make up our own, since we don’t have to get them from Equestria. Who wants to be in charge of that?” Rainbow, Pinkie, and Twilight raised their hands. “Cool, have fun, come get me if you need me to kick the magic thing.”

They left, Pinkie leading the way, while Applejack heaved herself to her feet. “We really need to get some furniture in here.”

Sunset ran a hand through her hair. “Put it on the list,” she said, not without humor.

“Point. Aren’t you worried they’re gonna come up with something weird?”

“Not that much. Rainbow’s lazy, Twilight’s smart, and Pinkie Pie’s easily bored. It’ll work out. It might involve sex, but it’ll work out.”

Applejack snorted out a laugh. “Works for me.”

“Where did everyone else go?” Fluttershy asked as she drew near. They filled her in while she held her hands awkwardly at waist level.

“...are you trying not to touch anything?” Sunset eventually asked.

Fluttershy made a face that, for her, was probably a grimace. “I don’t mean to say anything bad about the Clocktower, but... it’s just that there’s nowhere to clean up in here. The floor has that magic on it, but we don’t, and....” She trailed off, looking a little uncomfortable.

“You know, I’ve been wondering about that,” Sunset said. “It’s old, sure, but Equestria had indoor plumbing five hundred years ago, even if it was mostly enchanted. I don’t know why they wouldn’t put something similar in here.”

“What about if we can get that fountain working?” Applejack said. “Might be hooked up to some main... thingamajig.”

“Highly technical term,” Sunset sassed, even as they started walking in the direction of the fountain.

[“Collar Coded for Your Convenience, draft 1” by Rainbow Dash, Twilight Sparkle, and Pinkie Pie]

All right, listen up nerds. You wanna fuck the rainbow? Pay attention.

Dash! We can’t start it like that. This is supposed to be an informational pamphlet, not a pep rally.

Yeah, yeah.

Why not both? Pep rallies are fun!

Give me that, I’ll do the writing.

No way, you’ll make it all long and boring. Nobody cares how the machine works.

It’s important!

Nooooot really.

Fine then, you write it. Everyone’s going to think “fuck the rainbow” is a reference to you, you know.

What-?! Oh.

Did you really just forget your own name for a second, Dashie?

Ugh, fine, you win, here!

Thank you. ...Does anyone know if this guide we got from Equestria East applies to all the Clocktowers, or just that one? It’s kind of vague.

Nope!

No idea.

Well... okay. Let’s start with the basics, then.

Collar Coding and You

Do we have to call it that? It sounds like a weird sex ed PSA.

It is a weird sex ed PSA.

...oh.

Collars are the Clocktower’s way of identifying submissives within the Society. They are custom-made for each individual and as such cannot be shared or exchanged. The collar also functions as a symbol of implied consent, so--

Ugh, can’t we just steal the intro from the other one? It’s the same until you get to the colors. This is gonna take forever.

Well, we can skip it for the first draft, I guess.

Okay, so blah blah blah rules, whatever, what’s next?

We’re keeping the base colors the same, right?

The white, red, black, and ada- adam-

Adamantite.

Is that even a real thing?

Technically it just means anything so hard as to be more or less indestructible. So probably diamond.

‘Cause that’s so easy to come by.

We’ll figure something out. Anyway, I don’t see a reason to change it. I think the first thing that’s different is the color bands.

The bands or the borders?

Uh - the borders I guess. How are you supposed to remember all this...?

Here! Look through it.

Oh, that’s cool! Check it out, Twi, the masks have cheat sheets in them.

Huh.

So, the problem with the borders is they’re super unreliable, right?

Yep! What if you’re a girl but you have a dick and you’re looking for a guy? Does that count as straight? What if the guy thinks “straight” means his partner has a pussy?

Then he should go get her a cat, Pinkie, we already know all this.

Well, wait. Badges are already a thing, right? So why don’t we change it so that the color means the gender of the person you’re looking for, and then the badges mean their... you know, equipment.

Penis.

Dash!

Testicles. Vagina. Cervix. Vulva. Labia. Clitoris. Foreskin, stop blushing Twilight! I don’t believe for ten seconds that you don’t know what a vase difference is.

Vas deferens.

See? What’s the problem?

I just... a lot of this is new to me, Rainbow! I’ve just been kind of going with it because I like Sunset and she likes me and it’s not like I’m not interested but sometimes I feel like everyone assumes I know all this stuff because I’m smart but mostly I don’t! I’m not comfortable with it, I’ve spent years ignoring all this shit because maybe you lucked out with your kinky friend group but back where all us mortals live it’s not normal and it’s not that easy! I’m fucking terrified that I’m going to say or do something wrong and the rest of you will abandon me because I don’t know all the things you do, and, and, I’m not used to not knowing things. And I know that sounds stupid and it is stupid and I can come up with every single argument you’re about to try on me and all of them are right but I can’t stop feeling like this and I don’t know what to do!

....

Twilight? Do you want a hug?

...Yeah. I’m... sorry, you didn’t deserve-

Shhhh. C’mere. Have a cookie.

Where did you get that?

It’s clean.

Just go with it, post-meltdown Pinkie cookies are the best.

...Mm, wow, this is really good. Thanks, Pinkie.

No problem!

Sooooo you wanna talk about it, or?

Rainbow, I know you too well to think you actually want to hear me talk about my feelings.

Hey! I’m your friend. That means sometimes I do bullshit because it makes you feel better.

Thanks.

Wait, that didn’t come out right.

It’s okay, Dashie. She knows what you mean.

I do. And thanks, really. It’s... complicated.

Is it really, though?

It is for me.

Hey, hey, Twilight, listen. Let me give you some advice, one sub to another. Talk to your Dom. Talk to Sunset. Talk to her. Talk to her.

Let go of my face, Rainbow.

Sorry. But trust me. I’ve been here, doing this, same as you, and it only got better when I talked to Fluttershy. Sunset’s your... Top, or Dom, or Owner, or whatever you have. This kind of thing is what she signed up for.

Yeah, Twilight. And if you take too long we’ll do what we did for Dashie and Shy and lock you in a supply closet until you confess your feelings for each other and realize that you’ve been projecting what you want onto the other person but really you’re perfect for each other and each of you wants to be what the other one needs!

Uh... thanks? I think?

Pinkie, I think they’re past that step.

Oh. Well, that’s okay, something about supply closets is great for romance.

I think you might be missing the point, here.

Heh. It’s okay. Thanks, girls. And you’re right, I should talk to Sunset, and I will. I guess I didn’t realize how overwhelmed I was getting.

Don’t sweat it. ...Cock.

Rainbow!

Penis. Dicks. So many dicks!

Sunset doesn’t have a dick, and aren’t you ace?

So what? Dicks are always hilarious, Twilight.

Can we go back to pretending we were working on something?

Ha! Not a chance.

Author's Notes:

While I didn't have Rainbow go into depth, if you'd like to learn more about asexuality, Wikipedia is a good place to start. There are also plenty of asexual kinksters, which number includes yours truly.

Cock.