Episode 3: At the End of the Night

The hell that I created…

Twilight Sparkle was musing over the last thing that Fluttershy said to her before she found herself surrounded by darkness…

“What are they talking about?” she asked.

“It would seem that my illusion has worked all too well on you, Princess Twilight Sparkle.” the words of a familiar princess could be heard coming from the darkness.

Recognizing the voice, Twilight looked in front of her to confirm the thought…

“Princess Luna!” she cried.

Twilight then tried to run out to her, with the hopes of receiving some comfort from her, but was stopped by something. She felt like something was binding her forelegs...no matter how hard she tried to run towards Luna, she was stopped a fair distance from her by an invisible force that was tugging at her forelegs from behind…

“Why...can’t I…” Twilight said to herself in frustration, struggling as she could feel weakness and pain not just in her legs, but throughout her entire body.

“Do not even bother.” Luna told her. “Just allow yourself to be swung back by the fictional rope that holds you captive here. The fictional rope that holds you to this fictional prison.”

Something dawned on Twilight as she obeyed Luna’s order, her eyes widening as she allowed herself to be pulled back by the “rope”.

“Oh no no no…” she said as she shook her head, remembering what Luna said about her illusion. “Don’t tell me that you’re in on this too…”

“You say that as if you would be disappointed in me if it were the truth.” Luna replied. “Even though the only reason I am doing any of this is because I was given orders from the reality and fantasy gods of the Dark Sky...and any orders they give out are given to them by the Eternal Three. Are you aware of who the Eternal Three are, Twilight Sparkle?”

Twilight then remembered what K.C. was telling her about Fluttershy being the ruler of the Dark Sky, and her being the other…

“There’s a third?” she asked.

“Yes, of course.” Luna replied. “The completion of the Trinity, the one whose spirit works through the ruler of the light and the ruler of the dark…”

“K.C….” Twilight thought. “He said that Fluttershy ruled over the world as God...if she’s God...then must make me…”

“Let me guess…” Twilight said. “Fluttershy is the ruler of the light…”

Twilight’s eyes then turned green as a familiar aura of dark, purple-colored energy began to emanate from them.

“And I’m the ruler of the dark. The only reason I never knew...was because you cast an illusion that tricked my mind.”

“Wrong.” Luna replied, causing Twilight to perk up a bit, partially believing that maybe she was actually…

“I cast an illusion on your minds.”

“Fuck off.” Twilight cursed in her thoughts.

“So what, I have multiple personalities?” Twilight snarked, angry and disappointed.

“Yes.” Luna responded. “However, not in the traditional sense. In your case, you are fully aware that the character you play, the one that’s meant to deceive your friends into believing that everything is right as rain when it’s not, is a character of your creation even as you play her.”

“Pfft, what?” Twilight retorted with a smug grin. “That’s not multiple personality disorder. That’s just called acting.”

“So, you’d call the character you play in front of your friends a fictional one, am I right?” Luna retorted right back with a smug grin of her own.

Twilight’s smile of cockiness immediately became a frown of worry.

“No…” she thought. “You fucking bitch…”

“You know as well as I do…” Luna said. “That you want that character you play to be real…your pride won’t allow you to ever confess to anyone that she’s a creation of your imagination...and do you know what that’s done to your mind?”

“You cunt…” she kept thinking, even as she began to hear another voice in her head.

“Don’t think such things...you have to be good…”

“She’s talking to you right now, isn’t she?” Luna continued.

“No, she isn’t!” Twilight denied.

“Stop lying to her…” Twilight’s other persona told her. “Lying is wrong. Liars go to hell at the end of time…”

“I am not a liar!” Twilight yelled at her persona. “I never lie for myself! I do it to make life easier for everyone, and that just so happens to include me! Even if hell is real, what did I do to deserve it?! And don’t you remember what K.C. said? There is no end of time!”

“But who are we to say what we deserve and what we don’t deserve?” Twilight’s persona argued. “Even if this whole lying thing is irrelevant, are you truly as good as you think you are?”

“It’s always that same question…” Twilight replied, feeling weary. “And I always wish to humble myself and say that it is for God to answer, not me...but then...mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha…”

“MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!” Twilight began laughing maniacally for Luna to hear.

“WHERE IS GOD?!” she bellowed on impulse. “WHERE IS HE?! WHY WON’T HE HELP BREAK WHAT IS BINDING ME?! WHY WON’T HE HELP ME NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I PROVE IT TO HIM THAT I CAN’T HANDLE THIS ON MY OWN?! I WANT HIM! SO WHY DOESN’T HE WANT ME?!”

Luna stared at Twilight for a while, watching her pant and try to catch her breath, before saying…

“You say God...do you not mean my sister, Princess Celestia?”

“No, I mean God.” Twilight replied. “Princess Celestia...I have graduated from her teachings. I have since then lived as a “god” myself. And yet, I have never understood why God works the way he does.”

“You say that as if you actually believe in him…” Luna said with a skeptical look.

“It’s very tricky to explain…” Twilight told her. “With my outlook on life, I could very easily be classified as an “atheist nihilist”. But I can just never decide...the thought of God will just never abandon my mind no matter how doubtful I become of his existence...and then in turn, that makes me think...what does it mean to “not exist”? To not be present in our reality? But then...how real is our reality in actuality? How can we prove that reality is absolute?”

“Impressive…” Luna responded. “It seems my dream spirits have not slowed down your progress towards discovering the truth as much as I believed initially. I better comprehend now why you were chosen to be the ruler of the dark. You are highly intelligent, open-minded, and thorough in your thinking...and yet despite that, you are indeed inferior to Fluttershy as a god.”

“Aww, thanks for the backhanded compliment.” Twilight retorted, pretending to do a “cute” voice. “Go on, tell me what makes Fluttershy so much better. No matter what you say, I don’t give a fuck. You think this is some contest? You think I care about being the top dog? I want one thing, just one thing. A purpose for living. And I’m not settling for stupid shit like, “OH, IT’S JUST A TEST!” or, “OH, IT’S JUST MEANT TO BE ENJOYED!”. No, I want a real reason. I don’t care how I was created, I just want to know why!”

“That is something that I can never tell you…” Luna replied as she shut her eyes and knelt her head. “You will find the answer yourself...that is your job. Just like it was my job to impede your progress up until now. More specifically, make things more challenging for you...so that you would be stronger at the end of your journey. This is a journey that will indeed end with you discovering your true purpose...though I warn you, you won’t enjoy the results of your shortcomings…”

Twilight’s feelings on what Luna had just told her were very mixed. While she was very relieved to learn that she would succeed in discovering her purpose, she was also very mystified by what Luna meant by the “results of her shortcomings”...

“Where did I fall short where Fluttershy succeeded?” Twilight asked curiously. “And don’t tell me that she “had faith while I didn’t”. If you tell me that, I’m just going to laugh.”

“Nope,” replied Luna, “she certainly did not have the faith you’re talking about in that context. She was as agnostic as you.”

“What then?” Twilight asked. “I truly am curious...what makes Fluttershy better than me?”

“As a god, I shall explain why.” Luna replied. “None are better than anyone. All are created equal. But in measuring abilities, some are indeed greater in certain aspects than others. And Fluttershy’s aspect just so happened to be spiritual strength. Spiritual strength that she earned through being humble, honest, caring, courageous, and most of all, devoted. You, by contrast, are arrogant, compulsively dishonest, uncaring, cowardly, and worst of all, complacent.”

“Mmhhmm, yeah, fuck me.” Twilight said sarcastically. “Fuck Twilight, go Fluttershy. She’s just so honest, kind, and pure for tricking me into going to a Satanic party and traumatizing me for life.”

“Yes...” Luna responded. “...but it was you who ordered her to do so. Your mortal self may not know, but as a god, you planned this entire thing out with Ninja Time God Rarity and Fantasy God Discord. Everything but one factor...your encounter with Killer Christian. He has caused you to learn the truth sooner than you intended to by forcing you to remember your forgotten past. Originally, you had planned to gradually piece it together through clues given to you at the party.”

“So what I’m going through right now is my fault.” Twilight remarked nonchalantly. “What does it matter? That doesn’t make Fluttershy better.”

“The irony truly is stunning…” Luna retorted, squinting her eyes. “You just explained right there why Fluttershy is better. “What does it matter?” That’s exactly your problem...you don’t truly care.”

“.....” Twilight was silent this time.

“We both know the truth…” Luna said, her face marked with sorrow. “...the truth that you are so complacent that you would rather give up on your journey to find the answers you desire in favor of remaining miserable for the rest of your existence...and even choose giving up on existing altogether over eternal happiness...simply because it is the easier option of the two.”

“..........” Twilight was silent for quite a while before she finally responded with…

“Yes, you are right. I admit it. However, am I really so sinful for being complacent in the situation that I’m in? Being that I’m a mortal with no proof or even concrete evidence of anything that I’d like to devote myself to? It’s easy for you to judge, because you have always been a god. You, the other gods, and especially God himself have always existed knowing full well the reason why they exist. They could never relate to the problems of mortals such as hopelessness or despair.”

“No Twilight,” replied Luna, “that is a complete lie. No god, even God himself, has always been a god.”

And once again, Twilight was silent. Only this time, the expression on her face in response to hearing this showed that she truly had no idea Luna would ever say such a thing…even Luna, who had said what she had said so boldly, seemed surprised.

The next time Twilight Sparkle spoke, it was not in her ordinary voice...but in a robotic voice.

“FIRST THE SON OF NOIMMAN AND NOW THIS. I AM BEGINNING TO SUSPECT THAT THERE IS A TRAITOR AMONG US.”

“Preposterous.” Luna refuted. “Any changes made to the story can only be made by those who have been given permission by us gods, and even us gods must have approval for any change we make. It is a process that none can circumvent, even if any of us were to become disloyal.”

To quote the “golden rule” on story editing from the Awakening project…

“If something written in another god's storybook is unapproved, conflicts with what we wrote, or renders something we want to happen impossible to occur, it will not come true.”

Ninja Time God Rarity brought up what Fantasy God Discord had said back then to back up Luna’s case.

And if you’re not satisfied with empirical evidence, how about living proof? Just look at me. When have I ever been the loyal type?

Fantasy God Discord brought himself up to back up Luna’s case.

“THIS IS ALL INFORMATION THAT I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN,” replied Twilight in her robotic voice, “FOR IT IS ETERNALLY STORED WITHIN MY DATABASE. HOWEVER, THERE IS STILL ONLY SO MUCH THAT EVEN WE KNOW ABOUT THIS UNIVERSE. REMEMBER THAT. IN THE MEANTIME, I SHALL LOOK MORE INTO THIS “MASTER” OF “K.C.”...AN ISSUE THAT YOU TWO DON’T SEEM TO BE ALL THAT CONCERNED ABOUT...”

Because it’s nothing to be concerned about? We’ve explained our case, you know that even if we were to be hiding something, it would change nothing.

Ninja Time God Rarity replied with that.

We’re untrustworthy, dishonest, and shady characters, we know. But you out of all should know that that isn’t the scariest thing about us. The scariest thing about us is that the reason we’re like this is for the sake of what should be the truth…

Fantasy God Discord followed up with that.

“I CAN SEE THE INSPIRATION FOR MY SELF-INSERT.” Twilight replied in her robotic voice. “ONE WHO IS WILLING TO ACCEPT AND TELL ALL KINDS OF LIES IF IT MEANS THAT SHE WILL ONE DAY SEE THE TRUTH. BUT UNFORTUNATELY, SHE KNOWS NOT THAT WHAT WE DO ON OUR QUEST FOR THE TRUTH IS WHAT DEFINES US, SHOWS US THE TRUTH OF WHO WE REALLY ARE.”

“I tried my best to get her to understand that…” Luna said in a grieved tone. “I never wished to deceive her or anyone, but all must learn the truth for themselves, or else they shall never ascend…”

Luna had a melancholic expression on her face as she began to reminisce.

“Or worse yet,” she continued, “end up like me. Ascending to an existence that is naught but eternal torture…”

...the hell that I created...

Twilight said those words in her mind as she was suddenly back to being in front of Spike holding Fluttershy’s head.

“I know exactly what you mean, Fluttershy.” Twilight said in a deadpan voice. “It’s me…”