Strictly Academic Curiosity

by CarcinoGeneticist

First published 19th of January, 2017

Spike and Rarity are married now. Twilight's still curious about it. Rarity still doesn't mind sharing. Literally.

Once upon a time, Rarity and Spike finally got together and got married.

But all relationships have their challenges, and a few years down the line, Rarity and Spike have had to face a rather unique one: a growing size difference between them. They make do and adapt, of course, because that's what you do when you love each other. But it's always a challenge nonetheless.

Thankfully they still have a wide-eyed, curious nerd for a best friend who's just bursting to know what things are like for them these days… and eager to help them with it, too.

--

Thanks to Idylia for inspiration and writing help in the early stages of this story. Sorry it took so long to actually get anywhere with it.

Lovely cover-art by Bootsy Slickmane.

Part I

Sometimes - only sometimes - Rarity missed Ponyville.

Not because it was far away or anything. She could watch the sun rise over the humble little town every morning, bathing every spire and cobblestone with its warmth, and set again across the horizon every night as the moon took its turn to illuminate the town with a cool, soft glow. Really, her view was incredible. If her home weren’t completely uninhabitable under normal circumstances it would probably be prime real estate based on that view alone. In the million-bits range, easily.

But sometimes she really did miss living right down there in the middle of it all. It wasn’t as though she couldn’t trot down there any time she pleased and go about her day, of course, in fact she often did just that; but there was nothing quite like being the center of attention, so to speak. Years ago she never would have dreamed of giving up the excitement and the hustle and bustle of life at the Carousel Boutique, with ponies coming in and out at all hours of the day, and working her hooves raw to ensure each and every pony walked away with something chic, unique and magnifique in an effort to get noticed by Equestria at large.

Those days were gone now, though. Carousel Boutique was still going strong, yes, it was her most profitable store in the country, but it was no longer ‘home.’ There was hardly a single pony across all four corners of the map that hadn’t heard of her designs, which practically sold themselves nowadays, and so Rarity had stepped aside to let her work speak for her, and opted for a bit quieter a locale than the boutique. She no longer needed to put herself out there and draw in every customer she could and personally serve them. Now ponies came to her.

Metaphorically speaking, that is; they came to her shops, all across Equestria. Not her personally. Traversing a mountain trail was a bit too much of a hassle for that to be practical, and even if it weren’t, she doubted most of her clientele would want to come and get a fitting done inside a mountaintop cave, no matter how nicely Rarity dressed up the place. There was really nothing she could do about that, though. Her personal life came with some complications that limited her options as far as her place of residence, and this spacious cave way up the mountainside that overlooked Ponyville just so happened to be the most viable spot that was still close to home. The tabloids certainly raised a few eyebrows over that move, and even Rarity herself had to admit it made her feel a bit like a crazy old hermit sometimes, living up here in a cave that once housed a dragon years ago, and did again today.

But only sometimes.

Most days she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Spikey, dear!” Rarity announced, turning away from her view of the town to call back toward cave entrance. “I’m ready to go!”

“Nnggh… y-yeah, just… one sec, Rarity…” a low, gravelly voice called back.

The sound always sent pleasant shivers down Rarity’s spine; Spike’s voice had dropped some time ago, and though she could still easily recognize his old youthful drawl, it was much deeper now, rugged and mature and undeniably sexy. At the moment though, it sounded less like pure sex appeal and more distracted and in the midst of a struggle. And a second later the reason became apparent, as Spike himself came crawling out of the cave and stood up to his full height.

In a few ways the dragon hadn’t changed a bit over the years. His color scheme remained the same, lavender scales accented with green spines and an off-yellow belly, and his eyes the same old brilliant emerald green. But his actual body size was decidedly not the same. He was impressively tall now, easily three or four times Rarity’s height even if she stood up on her hind legs, and the broad, leathery wings that had sprouted from his back just last year made him seem even larger still. He was slimmer and sleeker now too, the pudgy stomach and stubby limbs of his youth giving way to the fit, proportional body of a young adult. By dragon standards, anyway; in pony years he’d been an adult for a long time now. Around that slimmer, fit belly, however, was the thing that was the source of his struggle: a pair of massive buckles that he was apparently having trouble securing, attached to long, thick straps cinched tight around his body that held a large, leathery brown harness securely in place on his back.

Rarity couldn’t help but smile, sigh, and shake her head. “Honestly, Spike, you’d think after forty or fifty times you’d have gotten the hang of that by now. And with fingers, no less!”

Spike blushed a bit, still struggling with the buckles. “I’m sorry, it’s just… nnggh… I can never get it… tight enough…”

Rarity rolled her eyes, though she never stopped smiling. “Oh, come here, you big oaf,” she said as endearingly as possible, her horn lighting up as she moved beside him. Spike obediently turned to face her and moved his claws out of the way, and like she’d done dozens of times before, Rarity grasped the buckles in her magic aura one at a time, cinching them just that little bit tighter that Spike couldn’t quite manage, and securing them so they would not fall slack even an inch. “There,” she said. “Really, Spike, sometimes I wonder if you intentionally struggle with those just so you can get me to do it.”

“Eh-heh,” Spike chuckled. “Well, I always do like the way your magic kinda tickles my belly.”

Rarity hid a grin behind one hoof. “I know, darling, but let’s save the foreplay for tonight, hm? We have a busy day ahead of us.”

“Shoot, yeah, you’re right, I gotta get to work,” Spike agreed. “Come on up.”

Spike brought his claws down to the ground, cupped securely together. Rarity hopped into his hands with practiced ease, and didn’t even flinch as he lifted her ten feet off the ground in a matter of seconds. She smiled ear to ear when he paused, as he always did, once they were at eye level with one another, and she pressed her lips to the tip of his snout with a soft smack, leaving a trace of lipstick and a dragon’s goofy grin behind. Then his hands moved again, stretching around toward his back, and Rarity hopped down right into the harness that she’d just secured there. It was designed for three ponies to sit comfortably in, each with their own seat-belt and hoof-hold straps, but for now it was just Rarity, settling into the front-most ‘seat’ and securing herself in place.

“Ready?” Spike asked, looking back to make sure she was buckled in.

“Ready, darling,” Rarity agreed.

Spike nodded and looked forward again as he stepped up to the edge of the mountain trail, careful not grip the edge too tight with his clawed feet and destroy a part of the solid ground Rarity often depended upon. He spread his wings out to full extension, and then stood still for a moment and waited, ready to catch a nice breeze.

“Now no aerial stunts on the way down today,” Rarity said. “I have lunch plans with Twilight and I’d like for her to be able to tell the difference between my mane and Rainbow Dash’s.”

“Gotcha,” Spike agreed. “Only three stunts today.”

“No stunts.”

“Read you loud and clear. Two stunts.”

“No stunts.”

Spike whimpered a little, looking back to give her a sad puppy dog face. “One stunt?”

Rarity frowned at him.

“For the kids?” he begged.

Rarity sighed. “…Oh, very well, one stunt. But just a small one!”

“Alright!” Spike grinned, pumping a fist victoriously, and a second later his wings launched them into the air, and sent them soaring on their way down toward Ponyville.

---

He chose a loop-the-loop, as it happened, which was fine by Rarity. It did minimal damage to her mane-style, nothing a quick combing couldn’t straighten out, and she hadn’t had her lunch yet, so she didn’t get sick or anything. She did hang on for dear life for a few seconds as she went completely upside-down, but that was merely reflex. She knew without a doubt that Spike would drop everything and catch her if she somehow fell. And the trick really was a hit with the foals. Cheerilee had suggested he start things off with a bang, and he wasn’t one to disappoint.

“Thank you so much for coming today, Spike!” Cheerilee greeted him as he made his landing in the empty plains on the outskirts of Ponyville.

“No problem at all, Miss Cheerilee,” Spike greeted the schoolteacher in turn. “Er, whoops, heh, I guess it’s Mrs. Cheerilee now, huh? Congratulations again, by the way.”

“Oh, it’s alright, Spike,” Cheerilee said, glowing a tad bit brighter pink than her coat. “And thank you so much for the ruby cufflinks, Macintosh just loved them.”

“Aw, it was nothing, I figured he’d love anything as long as it was apple-shaped,” Spike chuckled. “I’m just glad you guys didn’t mind getting your presents before the wedding.”

“Ahehe, no, not at all, they were a bit vital to the whole thing, after all,” Cheerilee insisted, turning her gaze to Rarity, who was just now hopping to the ground. “And speaking of which, thank you, too, Rarity, that was the finest wedding dress I could have ever hoped for.”

Rarity beamed back. “Oh, think nothing of it! It’s not every day I get to design for a wedding! I’m thrilled you liked it though.”

“So is this your class?” Spike asked, glancing behind Cheerilee at the cluster of foals huddled behind her, staring in awe up at Spike and oblivious to the adults’ conversation.

“Ah, yes, silly me, I almost forgot I’m working,” Cheerilee giggled, turning to face the foals. “Class, for our special lessons this week, we’re going to learn all about dragons! And as you may know, we have a wonderful young dragon living right here with us in Ponyville. Everypony say hello to Mister Spike.”

“Hello Mister Spike!” The class droned in unison.

“Hey everypony!” Spike smiled and waved. “Soooo… who wants to go flying?”

Every foal not born with wings bolted forward with their hooves in the air, begging to be called upon for the first ride. Rarity had to giggle at the sight; as much as having children was not currently among Rarity’s desires (or even among her possibilities, as far as she was aware), it was nice to know that Spike was so good with kids, if she ever did change her mind.

“Well, I’ll leave you to it, then,” she said, giggling again as she watched the small army of foals clambering all over his body to reach his saddle. “I’ll see you after class, alright darling?”

“Sure thing, Rarity. Tell Twilight ‘hi’ for me,” Spike replied, dipping his head low to the ground so Rarity could kiss the tip of his snout again, much to the teasing cries of the class of foals around them.

“Ooooooooooh, Spike and Rarity sittin’ in a tree--!”

“Ewwwww, kissing’s gross!”

“Is she your girlfriend?!”

Rarity couldn’t help but grin. “I most certainly am not!” She tossed her mane back a bit, and turned her head just so, until the morning sun glinted off a dazzling diamond ring around her horn. “I’m his wife.”

“Oooooooooohhhh!!!”

“Does that mean you kiss like my parents? Gross!”

“First comes love, then comes marriage--!”

“Wait, ponies can get married to dragons?”

“I wanna marry a dragon now!”

“I bet a dragon-pony baby would be so cute!”

“More like totally wicked!”

The class of foals bombarded the poor dragon with a million youthfully-curious questions, and Spike could only laugh awkwardly as he tried to address them all and Cheerilee attempted to get her lesson plan back on track. Rarity left them to it, waving goodbye one last time and trotting along her way into Ponyville proper.

---

“Reservations for two, please. Rarity and Twilight Sparkle.”

“Ah, of course, Mrs. Rarity!” the wait-staff stallion at the front counter replied immediately. “Miss Sparkle just arrived a moment ago, I’ll take you to your table.”

“Thank you so much, sir,” Rarity said, her magic slipping a sleek prism of sapphire into his breast pocket. The stallion immediately beamed and picked up his pace, and a moment later they were at the private booth Rarity had requested, where her friend and (former) fellow unicorn sat waiting.

“Rarity! So good to see you!” Twilight Sparkle greeted her, hopping up with a slight flutter of her wings and reaching out to give her longtime friend a firm, one-hoofed hug.

“A pleasure to see you as well, Twilight,” Rarity answered, returning the hug. “I say, it’s been far too long. A month, at least.”

“Closer to two.” Twilight chuckled. “It’s been a busy time in Canterlot. Sit down!”

“Don’t mind if I do,” Rarity agreed, taking a seat on the cushion across from her.

“Can I get you anything, ladies?” the waiter asked.

“Just a daisy sandwich and water for me,” Twilight said.

“An iced tea, a rose petal salad, and some privacy would be lovely, thank you,” Rarity answered.

“Of course.” The waiter bowed and hurried off to bring their order to the kitchen.

“Gosh, Rarity, you look incredible!” Twilight gushed, looking over her friend.

Rarity beamed at the praise. “Why thank you, Twilight. You know how much effort I put into good appearances.”

“Still, you look like you haven’t aged a day in… ten years. I don’t know how you do it.”

“Oh, you’re just saying that,” Rarity giggled.

“I’m not the only one,” Twilight said. “Have you seen your cover issue in Fashion Magazine?”

Twilight drew a rolled-up magazine from a saddlebag she’d brought that was sitting on the cushion beside her, and held it out to Rarity in a glow of purple magic. “I thought maybe the photographer was giving you some airbrushing or something, but you look just like your picture.”

It was true. The picture on the magazine’s cover wasn’t doctored in the slightest. It matched her current appearance perfectly. The sleek, pure color of her snow-white coat, the dazzling shine of her violet mane… despite technically being ‘middle-aged’ (goddess above that term made her shudder), she still looked like the hottest young thing in Equestria. At a glance, nopony would guess she looked any older than thirty. Rarity knew otherwise, of course, but still, she was quite proud of how well she’d managed to maintain a youthful appearance. If anything, she looked better than ever. Even at her very best, when she was actually that young, her coat and mane hadn’t had such a radiant, healthy shimmer to it.

“They say you’ve got some kind of extra edge on the rest of the fashion industry,” Twilight said, summarizing the article within that Rarity was now glancing over. “Everypony’s dying to know what your secret is.”

“Mm, yes, well, they can go right on wondering,” Rarity chuckled mischievously. “It’s a secret for a reason.”

“Are you sure? Rarity, you could sell whatever it is for millions. It doesn’t look fake at all, I’ve never seen such an amazingly natural shine to a pony’s coat before. No coat conditioner or mane shampoo in Equestria can even come close to--”

“I have quite enough bits from my fashion franchise to last me five lifetimes,” Rarity stopped her. “I practically put Spike’s hoard to shame. I understand what you’re saying, Twilight dear, but this one stays my little secret.”

“Heh… okay, okay, I understand…” Twilight chuckled quietly. “…Just saying, I’d buy it from you in a heartbeat!”

“Oh, Twilight, don’t be ridiculous, you don’t need some miracle product to look good. Why, you’re a princess of Equestria!”

“Still, heh,” Twilight forced another nervous chuckle, “I wouldn’t mind a trying a bottle… maybe for my birthday or something… just, you know, as a thought…”

Rarity allowed a coy smile to cross her lips. “…Why Twilight Sparkle, you sly young thing. You really want to try my beauty secrets that badly?”

“Heh, sorry, was it really that obvious…?”

“Subtlety isn’t your strong suit, darling.” Rarity giggled quietly. “Well… for you, Twilight, I’ll think about it. Ask me again later sometime.”

“Hehehe… thank you, Rarity,” Twilight said, nodding her head in agreement and letting the matter drop for the moment.

“So, how was Canterlot? As lovely as ever I presume?”

“I wouldn’t know, I hardly got to enjoy it,” Twilight sighed. “Princess Celestia came down with feather flu while I was there, and apparently she thought that was a fantastic opportunity to turn over Royal High Court duties to me for a while. To ‘teach me the ropes’ of full rulership.”

“Oh my!” Rarity gasped. “Royal High Court? How prestigious!”

“More like stressful,” Twilight countered, her wings fluttering again in agitation. “I know we kind of save the world more often than most ponies, but there’s something different about High Court. My decisions have a direct effect on the lives of the ponies I’m judging. I mean, sure, they were usually simple matters of the law, or really minor disputes with obvious solutions, or silly misunderstandings that blew out of proportion, but… erm…”

“So you loved it, then?” Rarity said with a smirk.

Twilight grumbled and scowled. “…Oh alright, yes, it was incredible. Still stressful, and I think I drank more coffee in two months than I’ve had in the whole rest of my life, which is really saying something, but…” Twilight’s scowl faded into a smile. “It was an amazing experience. Just seeing a fraction of the life Celestia lives on a daily basis, and knowing that she’d trust me with managing it in her absence… it was an enormous honor.”

“That’s what I thought,” Rarity smiled knowingly. “So, you spent your days hearing disputes from around Equestria?”

“At least a few a day,” Twilight confirmed. “Like I said, most of them were pretty simple disputes, really… follow a paper trail of ownership here, a request for a new tax there…”

“Were there any particularly… interesting cases?”

“Interesting?” Twilight thought for a moment. “Well, there was this one petition to organize a life-size chess league… seemed kind of silly, but I didn’t really see any reason why not, and Princess Luna was one of the petition-signers, so…”

Rarity raised a disbelieving eyebrow. “Chess? Really? In your whole trip, that was the most interesting case you heard?”

“Life-size chess. With actual ponies as the pieces. I don’t know, I thought it was pretty interesting. It certainly stood out, at least.”

“Well, yes, it is a bit of a unique request, but still, surely you heard at least one or two stories that were a little juicier?”

Twilight blushed right away, a clear tell that Rarity was onto something. “Rarity, I’m not going to share the private details of somepony’s personal life. That would be unethical.”

“You don’t have to name any names, Twilight, I’m merely curious!” Rarity insisted. “Come now, I’m sure you of all ponies knows what it feels like to be curious about the saucy and the risqué.”

Twilight’s blush tripled in strength. “You’re never gonna let me forget about that, are you?”

Rarity only smiled. “Even if I did, would you really want to?”

Twilight blushed deeper, glancing around nervously for a moment before cracking a slight smile. “No, I guess I wouldn’t.”

Rarity shot another coy smile right back. “Nor I, darling,” she said.

She really meant it, too. She had been with Spike for years now, and loved him with all her heart, and had shared many an earth-shattering climax with him, but that day right after they first got together, when Twilight had joined them in a fit of aroused curiosity, still ranked as one of the top three sexual experiences in her entire life. And despite Twilight nearly dying of embarrassment in the aftermath and being unable to look either of them in the eye without blushing for weeks afterward, Rarity knew she felt the same way. It was spontaneous, new, exciting, and creative all at once, and an experience none of them would forget, though it had remained a one-time occurrence; the stars had aligned perfectly the first time around to bring them together like that, and the feat had yet to repeat itself. But that was alright with Rarity. In a way, that made it all the more special of a memory.

“Now come, just one story!” she pressed, bringing both mares’ thoughts back to the present.

“Mmhh…” Twilight huffed for a moment, and Rarity could tell she was already conceding. “Well… there was this one case…”

“Yeeeessss?” Rarity gently pressed.

Twilight shifted her gaze warily around the restaurant once more, leaning forward and dropping her voice to just above a whisper. “There was a certain stallion from Manehattan, an earth pony, whom we’ll refer to as… erm… Stallion A.”

“Creative as ever, my dear,” Rarity said, cocking her eyebrow and leaning forward too. Stallion A, hm? The fun side of her hoped that meant there would be at least Stallions B and C; this was the royal court, after all.

“So Stallion A drags his hooves into the courtroom, his head hanging particularly low, with two mares at either side. B and C, naturally.”

“Oh, I imagine you couldn’t refrain from sneaking in a royal eye-roll, this story has practically told itself already,” Rarity mused, coaxing a delightful smirk out of Twilight.

“You’d think so; and I’ll admit, at first I thought so too. But the moment Mister A opens his mouth, I can tell he’s exactly the sort of stallion that would’ve swept you off your hooves at our first Gala. He’s madly in love with B and C and can’t bear to choose, and neither of them could steal his heart away from the other.”

Rarity’s eyebrow sharpened to an angrier slant. “Darling, you can’t really mean I’d pine after such an oaf! Having full-hearted intentions is more than fantastic, certainly, but without sensibility you might as well fall in love with a Windigo!”

“Mmhmm.” Twilight’s coy smile only grew. “You say that now, but if Blueblood hadn’t been so lacking in both categories, I’m sure you’d have found a way to convince yourself he was just a fixer-upper.”

Rarity faux-gasped and pulled away, fanning her forehead overdramatically with a hoof. “Oh, where has my friend gone?! Swallowed up by the indignation of princesshood, and after months of being apart, here she sits teasing me!”

Twilight responded only with a slowly-raising eyebrow of her own to accent her grin.

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Oh, fine, continue already.”

“Right… anyway, I was all ready to give him the lecture about how sometimes you have to make hard choices in life, and it wasn’t a decision I could make for him. …Except then it turned out it wasn’t just that this one stallion was in love with two mares. The mares were in love with each other too, and they couldn’t stand to choose any more than the stallion could.”

“Oh my!” Rarity practically squealed, clearly enjoying the story far too much. “This is juicy!”

“Oh, it gets better,” Twilight insisted. “So A, B, and C are all bemoaning the royalty and the lawmakers, complaining that their love must go unrequited… and I’m just sitting there clueless as to why they’re even here at this point. I open my mouth to speak up, but then the doors slam open and Stallion D runs in, and he breaks down and confesses his love to them all and that he couldn’t bear to see them united without him, and they all start practically crying and throwing their hooves in the air… you’d think they stepped right out of some trashy romance novel with dramatics like that.”

“What scandal!” Rarity said betwixt an excited gasp. “Certainly a love triangle is more than enough for most ponies, but a love square? Although, truth be told, it's not the most complex I've ever seen. There's a series of ‘modern’ romance novels that focus on having an ever-increasing love… love, erm… what's the word for a shape with some sides, but the ‘some’ keeps changing?”

“N-gon is a common one. A love n-gon, or love n-drangle.”

“Yes, well, the ‘n’ is equal to the number of sequels in the series. They're on the sixteenth book by now, so you can guess what that is like… this is relative simplicity by comparison! Honestly, you’d think they’d just marry in pairs and live together or something. I can’t even imagine what it’d be like to… well, you know.” A smirk danced across Rarity’s lips as she betrayed her own words and chanced to wonder exactly what two Spikes (and maybe a Twilight) would be like. “In any case, I suppose the only thing you could do was send them to Cadance, correct?”

Twilight cocked her head. “Why would I send them to Cadance?”

“Well, darling, she’s the Princess of Love! If anypony’s going to be breaking the law to wed four ponies together, surely it would be her?”

“Breaking the law?” Twilight crinkled her snout and gave her friend a pensive glance that swiftly turned annoyed. “Oh, for Celestia’s sake, not you too… doesn’t anypony read the actual laws in Equestria?”

Rarity blinked twice in confusion. “You mean to tell me polyamory became legal in just the short time I’ve been living up on the mountain? You’d think I’d have heard of such a thing…”

“You’d think everypony would had heard of it by now, it’s been legal for over six hundred years,” Twilight drolly corrected her. “Love triangles, love squares, love dodecahedrons, love n-drangles, it really doesn’t matter, it’s perfectly legal. So I finally cut them off and told them, ‘Look, I… I really don’t understand what the problem here is, if you’re all so in love with each other, why can’t you just all be together? I could perform a marriage right now.’ And obviously they’d never read a history book either because they just sat there, stunned. Well, they were stunned, for a minute, until they started praising Equestria and falling into each other’s hooves… sheesh, you’d think ponies would have the sense to at least make the trip to an Inn first.”

“You don’t mean they…?” Rarity wondered, awed. “Right there on the throne room floor?”

“No, thank Celestia… but not for lack of trying. I had to call the Royal Guard to escort them out before anypony got mounted.”

“Goodness… well I can certainly sympathize with their passion, love makes us do crazy things, after all. But still, right in the throne room…”

“It wasn’t too bad, the guards and I laughed it off afterward… they actually came back to court a couple of days later all dressed up and apologized for their behavior, and their new ‘dispute’ was to ask me to make good on my word, so I performed their marriage and that was the end of that.”

Rarity couldn’t help but coo appreciatively and clop her front hooves together. “Aww, wasn’t that nice of you. And good for them, too! I’m glad they got their happy ending.”

“Hehe, yeah, it was pretty heartwarming in the end,” Twilight agreed. “…So, was that juicy enough for you?”

“Oh, quite!” Rarity praised. “And educational too. Polyamorous marriage… well! You learn something new every day.”

“Mm… speaking of which,” Twilight changed the subject, “how’s married life been treating you, Rarity?”

The glowing grin that filled her face the instant she heard the question was probably answer enough, Rarity figured, but she couldn’t resist gushing anyway. “Oh, Twilight, it’s just wonderful. Spike is an absolute treasure. I’ve never felt so loved in all my life.”

“He’s really something special alright,” Twilight agreed. “I have to confess, when he told me he was moving in with you, I was pretty jealous. I’d gotten so used to having him around, it felt kind of lonely at home for a while when he was gone. Heh, and so many more chores to do!”

“Hehe, yes, he certainly has a helpful spirit, doesn’t he?” Rarity admitted. “He very nearly cleaned up my whole workroom one day early on before I came home and stopped him.”

Twilight smirked behind a hoof. “I can see why he tried, that place was always a mess.”

“I preferred to think of it as ‘organized chaos,’” Rarity countered coolly.

Twilight smiled wider, and seemed to sit up straighter, as though a weight was being lifted from her shoulders. “So then, you two are… happy?”

“Quite happy indeed,” Rarity affirmed, raising a curious eyebrow now. “Whyever do you ask?”

“Oh, n-no reason, really,” Twilight quickly deflected. “I was just, you know, curious. I mean, I know it doesn’t actually matter that you’re a dragon and a pony, as long as you love each other, but it is a pretty rare thing… at most it’s probably only happened once or twice in the last thousand years, and that’s only if you believe some rather unsubstantiated rumors about Princess Celestia that I would never ever in a million years ask her about.”

Twilight’s blush filled her muzzle, but Rarity was a bit too preoccupied now to notice, surprise filling her own expression. “Goodness, I… well, I knew it was probably rare, but not that rare. Why is it so unheard of?”

“Dragons and ponies don’t get along too well, historically speaking. Dragons can live perfectly fine on a diet of gems like Spike does, but most of them wouldn’t hesitate to eat a pony.”

Rarity couldn’t resist, a smirk breaking across her face. “Well, Spike does say I taste quite delicious when he’s licking my--”

“Yes, yes, I know, I walked right into that one,” Twilight swiftly cut her off, rolling her eyes a bit.

“Oh, I’m just teasing, dear. Dirty jokes aside, if you’re seriously wondering if I’ve ever been afraid of Spike actually eating me--”

“N-no, no, nothing like that!” Twilight quickly amended. “I know he wouldn’t, that’s just it. My point is that Spike proves it’s not a completely insurmountable hurdle between rational, intelligent species, but despite that, dragons and ponies still don’t have much contact, and looking strictly at romantic connections, they barely interact at all. And I couldn’t help but wonder if there were maybe more reasons for that than just, well, the usual tendency for predator and prey species to not be too friendly toward each other.” Another blush crossed her muzzle.

Rarity’s eyebrow crept upward yet again. “More reasons? Like what?”

“N-nothing really, I’m sure it’s fine,” Twilight insisted, hastening to leave the subject behind, whatever it was. “I mean, you’ve been married for years, if it was a problem it certainly would have come up by now, but if you say you’re happy then obviously it’s not a problem so I’m just spinning my wheels over nothing--”

“Twilight, what are you babbling about?” Rarity cut her off, not dissuaded in the least. “I’m not an idiot, you know, and I hardly think we need to be shy around one another, all things considered. If you want to ask me something then just ask.”

Twilight wilted instantly, and her blush grew stronger than ever. “Okay, okay, you’re right, sorry… I just couldn’t help but wonder whether… that is, if the two of you…”

“Yeeeeesss?” Rarity pressed.

“If you still… do it, now.”

Rarity blinked twice, very slowly. “…Pardon?”

Twilight cast her front hoof in a circle as she tried to better articulate herself. “I mean… I hate to point out the obvious, but Spike is pretty enormous these days. In more ways than one, assuming everything stays… proportional. He’s probably three or four times as tall as a pony, and that’s upright. And you’re still…well, a normal pony size…”

A slow smile crept onto Rarity’s face. Oh, so it’s like THAT, is it? she thought, an amused and not-unpleasant shiver running through her.

“And it’s just, well, unless I’m missing something, there’s no way that… erm… that traditional… physical intimacy is possible with such an extreme size difference between--”

“You’re asking if we still have sex,” Rarity said without hesitation, cutting Twilight’s roundabout rambling straight to the point.

Twilight, predictably, became beet red and snapped her mouth shut, responding with only a nod.

“Well, you’re right, Twilight darling, traditional intercourse went out the window some time ago. But I was not lying about being happy. Trust me, Spike makes me very happy,” she said, putting just the right emphasis on the word. “And you were also right to guess that it would surely have come up before now if it were an issue. But if you’ll allow me a deduction of my own, I’d say as smart as you are, you knew all that already before you even asked me the question in the first place. So why bring it up at all?”

Rarity leaned a bit closer before Twilight could reply, smiling over the table at her with her elbows on the table and her chin in her hooves. “Because, darling,” Rarity answered her own question, “what you’re really asking me is, how do we still have sex?”

Twilight’s mouth worked wordlessly like a fish out of water, and her wings were twitching with that excitable energy that said they were dangerously close to snapping open without being told to. Rarity allowed herself a victorious smirk at the sight.

Bulls-eye.

“I-I’m sorry, I don’t mean to… gossip,” Twilight stammered at last. “I’ve just been really curious lately about it… a strictly academic curiosity, of course… and I hoped you wouldn’t mind if I asked…”

“Well, I certainly don’t mind telling you…” Rarity assured her, smiling wider and leaning closer. “The bigger question is, do you really want to know?”

“Eh-heh…” Twilight let out a nervous chuckle. “…w-well, if you’re okay sharing, I wouldn’t mind listening--”

“Do you really want to know?” Rarity pressed. “Be honest, now.”

Twilight outright gulped this time. “…Yes. I really… really want to know.”

Rarity grinned. “Good. I’ve been dying to tell you about last night anyway.”

Part II

Rarity sincerely had no idea what exactly a dragon normally did with his hoard of gold and gems, besides ferociously guard it, and sleep on it. Or in it. She was used to putting her bits in a bank (and she still did, for the most part). Keeping one’s money in one’s own home at all times struck her as impractical; her and Spike’s cave was incredibly spacious, sure, but a full quarter of it was taken up by Spike’s hoard, a miniature mountain of golden bits and precious gems and pearl necklaces and even a crown or two. The previous tenant had abandoned the place treasure and all, and Spike was happy to move in and inherit the hoard, but Rarity had insisted on a few generous donations just to give them ample living space. And even after that, it looked more than a little tacky.

But most nights, Rarity didn’t actually mind.

Much like a foal daydreaming about swimming in a pool of gold coins, there was something exhilarating about having sex atop a mountain of money.

She was wearing the crown tonight. A complex but elegant affair, with diamond-cut gems of all types circling the rim, platinum coloring that matched her coat and accented the wedding ring on her horn, and white velvet lining the underside where it sat on her head. Spike loved it when she wore the crown. She knew that because every time she did he spent a little longer eating her pussy, made sure she came an extra time or two, came a little harder himself when it was his turn. Doubly so when she wore the fire ruby - their fire ruby - around her neck, too.

But she always wore that.

She was lying on his stomach at the moment, while he was flat on his back on a bed of gold coins. She was technically on all fours, but her front end was bowed low and her face was pressed against his soft underbelly, nuzzling it and moaning as she happily savored his pleasant body temperature warming her cheeks. Her hind end meanwhile was fully upright, tail flipped up over her back, and she could feel Spike’s careful, tender kisses peppering her backside and making her shudder with every hot breath he drew. Privately she was kind of jealous of how flexible he was, able to reach his head far enough down his own body to literally kiss her ass when she was using his belly for a bed. She was never that flexible even in her twenties. But she was finding it hard to care all that much at the moment.

Rarity gasped and cooed as several claw points tenderly scratched her back, swiftly covering her sides and flanks with pleasantly firm and not-quite-painful strokes; Spike never let his claws get that sharp. Another kiss touched her rear next, making her whole body shudder and a hot drip of fluid streak down her thighs. His jaws were so massive and broad now that one little kiss covered an entire cheek back there, and she could feel the outline of his enormous, razor-sharp teeth kept carefully behind his lips. It was a little exhilarating, actually. More so than she had ever thought foreplay could be before her most recent years with Spike. She never truly feared him, of course, he was an absolute angel and extremely careful at all times; but feeling the mere outline of his teeth, seeing them bared whenever he flicked his tongue out… they always gave her a giddy little thrill deep in her core, making her heart pound and her pussy wet all at once. It was like riding a really erotic roller coaster; you knew you were completely safe, but that didn’t stop you from being scared and excited and turned on all at once when you hovered right at the edge of that first big drop.

Another hot breath washed over her hindquarters as Spike’s lips drew back and his mouth opened, and now Rarity got even wetter, because she knew what was coming next - besides herself, of course. A second later she squealed right on cue, as Spike’s tongue flitted out and ran along her underbelly, from the center of her chest all the way down over her stiff teats and dripping snatch. He took special care to lick over those last two parts with a little extra gusto, and Rarity had to bite down on her hoof to keep from screaming and coming right then and there.

Spike’s tongue had always been proportionately very small compared to the rest of him; nothing at all like a fat, broad stallion’s tongue, his was instead a thin little ribbon, forked at the tip and almost fragile-looking. But that was deceptive; it was also insanely long, and entirely prehensile. The first time they were ever together he insisted on going down on her, and Rarity had expected to be a bit disappointed by the lack of a thick, meaty pony tongue pumping into her lady parts. But after that first few seconds of his tongue reaching deeper inside her than she thought was possible, touching everything she wanted touched at once with finely-controlled precision, Rarity’s expectations did a complete one-eighty, and she was rewarded with the fastest orgasm she’d ever received to date.

Now, though? Now was when the small size of his tongue really paid off. Because as big as the rest of him was? His tongue was now the perfect size for fucking her senseless.

Her entire body flinched as Spike licked her again, more focused this time, dragging countless inches of slick, snake-like tongue over her rigidly-hard teats. He loved teasing them, not just to please her, but also it seemed to amuse him immensely that whenever he reached the end of a lick, he could flex the forked bit and flick both tips perfectly off the peaks of her nipples, making them both quiver. Rarity never complained in the slightest, of course, in fact her cunt was starting to resemble a leaky faucet at this point, but that was getting to be a problem that needed solving. Her moans grew a bit more shrill and needy, and she stamped her hooves and humped the air impatiently, her body pleading with him for more. Spike was content to stay right where he was, though, flicking his forked tips rapidly back and forth over both her nipples, half-teasing and half-pleasing her until she squealed in delight from both.

Spike let out a low, rumbling chuckle, apparently satisfied now, and finally moved his tongue higher, circling the flushed, winking, dripping mess that was currently her pussy. She whined and wiggled her ass again, and this time he decided not to tease her; his forks met and drew across her groin until they slipped between her outer lips and spread her slightly open, and then with a throaty growl, he plunged about ten inches of writhing, fleshy tongue straight down inside her all at once.

Words failed her every time. Anything that came out of her mouth when his tongue was in her cunt was either uncontrolled moaning or incomprehensible gibberish. It fucked her at a depth comparable to any cock, with all the speed and power that a mare could want or expect. And though it lacked the firmness of a true cock, and it couldn’t flood her every orifice with hot creamy spunk, it still had its own unique advantages.

“Uuuuwwwaaaaahhhhh!”

Rarity belted out a wailing string of nonsense as Spike got right to work and fucked her with his tongue, rocking her body forward and flattening her face against his belly with each thrust. Her own tongue lolled out while she gasped open-mouthed for air, her lungs already struggling to keep up with her oxygen needs, and Spike showed no signs of stopping; he never did. That was advantage number one: pump her full of jizz he could not, but that just meant refractory periods were nonexistent. He could fuck her like this for hours if she cared for it, never needing to recharge between rounds. Even a normal stallion’s tongue might have gotten worn out after a while, but Spike never seemed to. Whether it was because his tongue was more durable or he just got that much enjoyment out of devouring her snatch, Rarity didn’t know or care, because he never, ever stopped until she was satisfied.

And Rarity could handle a lot of satisfaction.

Before that happened, though, advantage number two came into play, making Rarity squeal and drool: Spike’s tongue, for all intents and purposes, was alive. A stallion’s cock was a natural, living part of his body, of course, but this tongue was almost like a separate entity altogether; it squirmed and wriggled and twisted and writhed inside her even as it fucked her, a powerful extension of Spike’s own will and desire that he could control every inch of. It had been a little unsettling the first time, actually, conjuring images in her mind of some of the more unsavory comics she’d seen in her days, of mares being bound, gagged and ravaged from all directions by the thick, slimy, and suspiciously penis-shaped tentacles of some horrific monster. But now she could definitely see the appeal; it was warm, it was wet, it was deep, and it touched everything.

It being attached to her devoted, diligent lover didn’t hurt, either.

Rarity squealed again from a particularly twisty, almost sort of drilling series of thrusts, a trail of drool running from her slack jaw down the curve of his belly until his body heat eventually evaporated it. She was getting close, moaning and shaking and giving him all the obvious tells of impending orgasm. Usually this was when he’d pick her up in his gentle claws and hold her even closer, to really savor the peak of her pleasure, but this time, his tongue suddenly removed itself from her nethers instead of finishing her off. A moment of silence fell between them as Rarity stopped panting, and glanced up in a daze when she realized the pleasure was gone.

“Guh…? Spike? What--?”

She felt it before she saw it: a whip of pink lashing around her barrel and all four of her legs one by one, yanking her off her hooves and flipping her over on her back.

“Aaaaaiiiieee--mmmmmppphh!”

Something wet and fleshy slapped over her open muzzle, quieting her startled squeal. This was new; she was virtually immobile now, her front legs locked together above her head while her hind legs were pinned loosely apart, each held firm by a warm coil of something, and her jaws locked open around a similarly warm belt of flesh.

Speaking of being bound and gagged…

Her next yelp of fright was muffled as her bindings lifted her into the air (somehow the crown managed to stay snug on her head), and suddenly she found herself looking her giant lover in the eye. He was sitting up now and grinning wide, showing off those wicked pearly whites that made both her heart and her pussy clench, and his tongue stretched out from between them, clearly arcing right up to her prone body and confirming her suspicions; Spike had literally tied her up with nothing but his tongue.

Of course. Advantage number three: With Spike’s tongue? There was always more.

Even the most impressive of stallion cocks eventually hilted in their orifice of choice, but Spike’s tongue never seemed to end. When he was younger he could practically mummify himself with it. Nowadays she hadn’t witnessed him attempt the feat again, but he still had enough tongue to… well, to commit an act of bondage with it, apparently.

The part covering her mouth loosened and fell away now, and the very tip of his tongue entered her vision, hovering in front of her like a snake and dripping wet with either drool or her own juices. Probably mostly the latter. Beyond that, Spike himself eyed her with a hopeful smile.

“Is this okay?”

Rarity hesitated just long enough to feel her clit wink.

“More than okay, Spikey-Wikey…”

Her horn glowed briefly and, as if to emphasize the point, tugged the tip of his tongue closer and gave it a little kiss. To her surprise, his whole tongue quivered around her, and the barest of groans slipped past his lips. Rarity immediately raised an eyebrow in amusement; he liked that, did he? Well, she could certainly work with that…

Her magic flared again and drew his tongue closer, planting a much wetter, heavier kiss on its surface, just past the forks. He shuddered a little more, and Rarity pressed it further, opening her mouth and licking him with her own tongue. She could actually taste herself on him now, a sweet and tangy flavor layered atop his own natural heat and spice, but it didn’t bother her. Her focus was elsewhere, groaning open-mouthed and practically making out with his tongue. Spike was almost too eager to return the gesture, pushing his tip forward and into her mouth to battle with her tongue directly. It wasn’t really much of a battle, her tongue felt tiny and downright feeble in comparison, but Rarity fought anyway, playfully flirting and flicking with her tongue as his forks danced circles around it.

Eventually Spike pushed it further, more of his tongue entering her mouth and forcing her jaws open wider. He was aware of her limits, of course, but he still pushed her right to them, curling his forks back and thrusting the meat of his tongue almost all the way into her throat. Not quite deep enough to trigger her gag reflex (what was left of it anyway), but definitely enough that she had to actively concentrate on breathing through her nose.

Now this felt familiar. It had been quite a while, and the phallus in her mouth was softer and squishier than she remembered, and she was probably a bit rusty at it by now despite taking great pride in her skills. But she certainly hadn’t forgotten the slit-soaking sensation of deep-throating her lover.

Poor boy, I haven’t been able to blow you properly in a long time, have I?

Well, she still couldn’t, sadly, but she could at least give him this.

She locked eyes with her lover, and then with practiced ease Rarity bobbed her head back and forth, sucking and slurping on his tongue like it was a cock. She couldn’t grip it, of course, her hooves were still tied up in the rest of his tongue, but that was okay, her mouth was clearly what he wanted. He was already thrusting his tongue in time with the bobbing of her head, and he never broke their gaze, staring back at her with reverent lust. Rarity didn’t break it either, she never did; there was something perversely thrilling about staring into each other’s eyes while her mouth was stuffed with dick (or dick-equivalent, she supposed), never looking away, barely even blinking until… well, until he was finished, giving her a satisfied smile and drawing his tongue back and allowing her to breathe properly again. It wasn’t quite the climax it used to be, of course, but…

Well. That would come (hah, come) later, she thought, and nearly came herself thinking about it.

Spike’s whole tongue shifted now, and Rarity felt her hind legs being spread wide by the massive pink coils. A fresh warmth washed over her exposed delicate bits as Spike stared shamelessly, and his volcanic breath left him. But of course Rarity let him look, she wanted him to look. In fact, as long as he was looking, why not step it up a notch? Tied up or not, he still couldn’t do anything to stop her horn, after all…

“Like what you see, darling?” she cooed.

Spike’s only reply was a soft rumbling in his throat and a slow nod, meeting her eyes again.

Rarity smiled coyly back, and then her horn lit again, soft blue light drawing his attention swiftly back to her spread legs. And while Rarity was positive he was watching, the fat bead of light resting between her nether-lips split in two and moved to either side, pushing apart the pale pink flesh as they went and spreading herself open even further than her splayed legs could allow. She was practically gaping now, treating her lover to as much of her sopping, winking, drooling cunt as she could possibly show off, and judging by the hungry whine from Spike’s throat, it was having the intended effect and then some.

“How about now?” she finally said, her voice syrupy-sweet and her eyelashes fluttering.

Spike was drooling now, panting even, and if Rarity had cared to look, she was sure she’d see a couple of titanic towers of flesh throbbing somewhere behind and below her, stiff as diamonds and straining for their turn.

Soon darlings, patience, she thought, as though the masculine spires could hear her. The lady’s turn is almost done.

“Rarity…” Spike nearly growled, the tip of his tongue flicking closer to her. It was already hovering right beneath her hips now, catching the steady drip - drip - drip of feminine juices that flowed from her sex. “Can I…?”

Rarity grinned immediately. “Do it, Spike. Finish what you started…”

His tongue plunged back inside her instantly, and Rarity threw her head back, belting out a shriek of ecstasy. Her magic flickered and died as she lost concentration, but it had done its job; Spike’s entry was effortless with her so spread open, allowing him in so deep and so fast that she felt him bottom out against her cervix in record time. She barely had the chance to wince before his tongue got moving again, jack-hammering into her with the relentless enthusiasm of a first-timer and the knowing precision of a long-time lover. She thrashed against her bindings - not seriously, of course, she was just really getting into the role of the ensnared, ravaged damsel now - but the pink coils held firm around her limbs. All she could move was her hips, and even then she was just humping like there was no tomorrow, meeting the thrusts of Spike’s tongue and pushing it that much deeper, that much harder, that much faster, until she squealed his name between thick moans and desperate pleas for more.

Soon even those simplest of words failed her again, devolving back into almost insane babblings as impending orgasm once more bubbled forth in the pit of her loins, leaving her quivering and drooling twice as hard as before. Spike didn’t let up this time; he’d pushed her to the edge once without finishing the job, he wasn’t about to do that again. The twisting, writhing thrusts kept coming, fucking her and fucking her and fucking her until, right as she was at the very edge of climax, she looked up at her lover. His face was inches from her body, his teeth bared, his jaws open ever so slightly in a hungry, perverted smile.

Her heart froze.

Her pupils shrunk down to dots.

Her pussy clenched again.

“Come for me, Rarity…”

Rarity obeyed.

Rarity obeyed hard.

Her head flung backward again as she screamed, her orgasm boiling over and exploding through every nerve in her body. Spike’s tongue popped out of her at the last possible second, and then she was cumming, clear fluids exploding with cannon force across Spike’s waiting, eager tongue. Rarity had never thought herself much of a squirter once upon a time, probably because of some nonsense about it not being very ladylike. But she’d quickly learned that not only was being ladylike in bed boring, she was also pretty sure it was one of Spike’s bigger kinks to turn her into a whimpering, gushing mess and guzzle down her cum with all the eagerness that the average stallion expected from a mare giving a blowjob. And who was she to deny such a giving lover?

Then suddenly the forks of Spike’s tongue were resting on her pelvis, aggressively flicking her clitoris mid-climax, and now even if she’d wanted to, she couldn’t hold back. Rarity came. Rarity came like a porn star, wailing and humping and gushing uncontrollably like a loose fire hose, and Spike was right there waiting for it, jaws wide and salivating, huffing warm breaths over her nethers as she squirted down his throat. For a solid minute (though it felt like a small eternity) he kept at it, making her thrash and scream and cum, and just as she was about to plead that she couldn’t take any more, he seemed to already know it, laying her down again on his belly. His tongue uncoiled from around her limbs and barrel, taking one last lick of her exhausted pussy and drawing out one more little spurt of her love juices before it left her entirely. She was a panting, twitching, dehydrated, and absolutely ecstatic mess of a pony right now, splayed out obscenely and too exhausted for the moment to even close her legs. And if her eyes weren’t still crossed and blurry in her state of orgasm-induced delirium, she would have seen the self-satisfied grin on Spike’s face as he licked his lips where the spray of Rarity’s climax had missed his mouth, just to make sure he got it all before he swallowed it down.

“Mmmhh, just as delicious as ever…” he whispered, though at his size it came out like more of a low rumble, thick with lust and desire.

“I’m glad… you liked it…” Rarity managed to say between heavy, gasping breaths. “I made it… myself…”

Spike snickered at her joke. “You gonna be okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine, darling… I just need a bit of a drink.”

“Oh, heh, right. I think the bottle rolled over here…”

Spike plucked her water bottle between two dainty claws from wherever it had ended up amidst his hoard and passed it over. Rarity sat up and took it between her hooves; she didn’t trust herself to hold it by magic without dropping it just yet. “Thank you,” she said, drinking deeply from the bottle for a few seconds.

“Anytime,” Spike said, and then swiftly grew a hopeful smile. “So, uh… my turn…?”

“Ah, yes… of course,” Rarity agreed, setting the bottle aside again as she caught her breath and her strength slowly returned to her. “I wouldn’t dream of refusing to repay you for that little adventure…”

“Eh-heh, it wasn’t too much…?”

“Did I sound as though I was complaining?”

“Hah, no, I guess not.”

“Perhaps a bit more warning next time, though, before ensnaring me…”

Spike flashed a teasing smile. “Aww, but then it wouldn’t have been a surprise.”

“Mm, yes, true…” she conceded, but then smiled back and waggled her eyebrows. “But perhaps with a little advance notice I can better play along, hm?”

Spike stiffened for a moment, and then grinned twice as wide. “Okay. Deal.”

“Good boy… now lie down and enjoy yourself while I work.”

Spike nodded agreeably and laid back as comfortably as he could, head propped up against the cave wall so he could watch the show. Rarity meanwhile rolled over and got to her hooves, barely. Her entire hind end still trembled and quaked from the aftershocks of such a powerful climax, and her hooves sunk a bit into the softer scales of Spike’s underbelly when she put her weight on them. But she kept her balance, and as she took a few steps down toward his waist, she finally drank in the sight of her impending (and thoroughly enjoyable) task.

Spike, ever humble, was always quick to correct ponies who discovered what he was packing that it wasn’t really two entire separate cocks, it was one that split off into two separate heads. But of course Rarity knew he was downplaying it. The split was so close to the base that they might as well have been two separate cocks, more than independent enough to fill Rarity two holes at a time back when he was pony-sized. And though she missed those days, there was still something to be said about how impressive Spike was now. Each of his cocks was almost as big as Rarity herself, stretching from her front hooves to the base of her tail, and so thick around that she had to use two hooves to fully encircle one. They were nothing like a stallion’s member, sporting a uniform fleshy-pink color instead of a mottled or jet-black tone, with rounded tips instead of a flat, flared one, but that was fine with Rarity. The pink was a more appealing color anyway, and the rounded tips always made it that much easier to work them inside of her back in the day, especially when he’d been right on that edge of ‘almost (but not quite) too big for her.’ They were already hard, of course - she’d be a little insulted if they weren’t - and they were also already starting to lubricate themselves, trickles of clear, slick fluid forming at each tip and rolling down in rivulets along each shaft. It was here that Rarity began her work.

“Mmhh, Spikey, you look good enough to eat…”

“Thanks, I made it myself.”

Rarity giggled and settled herself in front of the shaft closest to her. Her hooves gently hugged around the meaty shaft and brought it closer to her body as she stuck her tongue out for a lick, catching the next droplet of draconic essence as it ran down his length. Her tongue traveled up from there, licking up the wet trail all the way to the tip, where she licked him clean before finally swallowing the modest mouthful. His taste was always hot, in more ways than one, probably the spiciest thing her tastebuds could handle without being burned off, and very warm to the touch on just her hoof. It was a much more intense heat inside her more sensitive mouth, though not enough to burn; rather, it was hot like a cup of tea that had cooled down just enough to drink comfortably. Rarity loved it, really. She loved how literally everything about him was so incredibly, soothingly warm, from the embrace of his wings and breaths of fire right down to the flesh of his cocks and the taste of his cum. For a helping of that, though, she’d have to work a bit harder…

With a quick flash of magic, the freshly cleaned cock in front of her was pressed flat to Spike’s pelvis. Rarity swung one hind leg up and over it, a few inches down from the tip, and plopped her spectacular rear right down onto his warm prick. She was still drenched and gooey from her own climax, and so with every shift of her rump, her nethers slid across his, smearing him with a fresh coat of her own flavor.

“Nngggh…”

Rarity smiled; Spike was groaning already. He wouldn’t last long.

With slow, precise movements, Rarity ground her hips back and forth along the length of his first cock, jutting her rear out at the end of each backward grind to make sure Spike got a good look at everything back there. Her juices spread over his length everywhere she slid her crotch, trickling down the sides in lots of small trails and soon starting to steam on his hot flesh. Spike often teased that the sight gave a new definition to the phrase ‘smoking hot,’ and Rarity couldn’t help but agree. The heat was a very pleasant sensation on her own bits as well; she could probably get another orgasm or two out of grinding herself on his cock like this if she wanted to. But right now, Spike was her primary concern.

While her pussy did its best to massage one of his cocks, Rarity set her sights on the other, tugging it toward her with her magic. It was just as big and impressive as the first, and Rarity swiftly licked this one clean too, gathering herself another helping of the pre-cum trailing its way down his shaft. It was even more copious now than with the first one; her mouth was almost completely full by the time she got from the base all the way up to the tip. But Rarity eagerly gulped it down all the same, savoring yet another powerful wave of warmth running down her throat and filling her belly.

Her hooves gently hugged the eager appendage close to her chest; the tip was at eye level with her head now, and she slowly began kissing it as though it were Spike’s face, peppering the smooth, curved mushroom cap with swift, lighter pecks all over the surface before parting her lips and outright making out with it, right at the very peak of the tip where it was slit open. A steady trickle of pre-cum flowed from within, Spike was so worked up at this point, and Rarity continually, greedily gulped it down as she made out with Spike’s cock. If she opened her mouth as wide as possible and really stretched, she could still almost get all the way around it… almost. But not quite. Not without dislocating her jaw anyway. A pity, she really had prided herself on her blowjobs, something she could still do for a while even after he was too big to fit her other two holes anymore. Still, Spike didn’t complain. His groans of pleasure grew ever louder as she kissed and licked his tip and gulped down the lazy trickle of fluid that leaked past her lips; and all the while her pussy ground itself against the first cock she was still straddling, until she could feel them both pulsing and throbbing with need. He was getting close. Time for the big finish.

Rarity slid herself off his pinned prick and let it pop back upright. Her horn crackled to life once again, much brighter this time, and pointed toward the base where his twin shafts split from. As Rarity focused, two beads of light formed, and each of them began drawing a spiraling line up his cocks. More misty blue light filled in the gaps along the way, until both of Spike’s spikes were almost entirely encased in her magic. Then with a slight tilt of her head, her magic aura crackled and shimmered, and the neon blue cylinders hugging Spike’s meat started sliding up and down, pumping his cocks in perfect rhythm like a couple of well-oiled pistons.

“Hnnngh…!”

On and on Rarity went, grinning widely to herself as Spike’s groans grew louder and increasingly desperate. He was struggling to not hump the air or squirm around and throw her off, but for the most part he held still, and so Rarity continued uninterrupted, her magically-conjured cock-sleeves steadily pushing him to the breaking point. She couldn’t quite simulate the warmth and wetness of her own pinker parts, but as Rarity well knew by now, half the fun of their sex life now was finding ways to please each other that would have been impossible with their genitals anyway, even if it was little, simple things. So her magic shifted, and her twin tunnels started stroking him not in simple lockstep but alternately, one sleeve grinding its way down to the fleshy base while the other soared high and engulfed the whole cockhead, only to swing back and swap to the other extreme, in the same perfect rhythm as before.

Spike’s whole body shuddered, clearly thrilled by this newest wrinkle. His groans grew into soft roars, his cocks throbbed so hard they threatened to break Rarity’s concentration, and the river of fluids dripping from them was thicker than ever.

“Rarity…!” he cried. “Almost… gonna…!”

“I know, Spikey… go ahead… it’s your turn to come for me now…” she cooed back at him.

Spike nodded his agreement as he let out a climactic howl, and Rarity made sure to give his cocks a few extra rubs for good measure, wrapping his shafts up fully in her magic, save for the very tips. She left those open and free; no sense closing him off and wasting his precious payload. Especially since it was going to be a big one today. She felt him throb and twitch again, pushing against her magical aura, but she held both shafts steady, and aimed them skyward at just the right angle.

The next few seconds for Rarity felt like they happened in slow motion. Spike’s cocks gave an almighty final throb, and the first explosive pulses of his semen launched into the air, twin geysers of pale-white and uniquely sparkling cum sailing halfway to the cave ceiling before they reached the crest of their arc. More pulses followed right behind the first in rapid succession, but Rarity had no more time to savor the sight, the first shots were already on their way back down. Rarity hurried to judge the angle and shift her seat - half-step to the left, two steps back, there, perfect - and then sat back, tossed aside her crown so it wouldn’t get soiled, and closed her eyes.

Give me everything you’ve got, darling.

The first streak of Spike’s cum landed on the back of her head and splashed all the way down her spine, and even when she was fully prepared for it she still twitched and almost gasped at how hot it was, easily the hottest part of making love to a dragon, literally. It didn’t hurt, of course; it was merely just shy of uncomfortable, like jumping into a hot bath a bit too quickly. But before she even recovered from the first shot, the second one hit her in the chest and streaked down her forelegs, smearing her entire front half with another blast of hot, creamy spunk. The third shot missed landing on her directly, through it did land square on her tail and plaster it flat against Spike’s belly. It wasn’t until the fourth shot that she scored a direct hit, a particularly fat bulb of semen that struck just in front of her horn before splattering, half going one way and streaking her mane, and half going the other way and running down her face and muzzle.

Spike’s essence completely engulfed her senses now. All she could feel was the intense, almost overpowering heat seeping into her coat. All she could hear was the steady splat splat splat of more and more thick, gooey wads of cum raining down on her body. All she could smell and taste was the musky hormonal aroma and fiery spice of pure draconic male-ness. All she could see was… well, she couldn’t really see anything with her eyes closed - and she wasn’t about to open them, because who in their right mind wanted jizz in their eyes? - but she could easily imagine what a sight she must have been, utterly smothered head to hoof in an avalanche of cum, not even a single strand of mane or tail or patch of fur left bare, every inch of her coated in a layer of white with plenty more to spare in the growing puddle around her hooves as a seemingly endless supply poured from his massive towers of--

“Oh my goddess you are SO exaggerating.”

---

Rarity snapped out of her reverie, thoroughly pink in the face and blinking across the table at Twilight Sparkle. “What was that?”

Twilight was sporting similarly-red cheeks, a barely-even-nibbled-on daisy sandwich lying in front of her. “I said, you’re exaggerating. Hard. That kind of… volume is absurd. And impossible.”

Rarity scoffed, pushing her own emptied plate away. “Why, there’s nothing impossible about it, Twilight. I mean, you have seen him recently, haven’t you? If he stood upright I daresay he could look through a second-story window without even stretching.”

“Well, yes, he’s gotten pretty big, but that doesn’t necessarily mean--”

“Twilight, do you remember how he finished all those years ago?”

Twilight closed her mouth and blushed even harder than she already was. “…I… vaguely? I sort of passed out right after that, you two had already cleaned up before I came to…”

“And had the most adorable little freak-out about it,” Rarity added with a smile.

“Yes, thank you for reminding me,” Twilight grumbled. “Anyway, um… I’m pretty sure I remember he finished, erm… i-inside me… or, us, I guess I should say…?”

“That’s right… enough to capably fill the both of us. And that was when he was pony-sized. How much bigger is he now?”

“Well… if I’m being generous, maybe four times the size of a pony…”

Rarity could almost see Twilight’s brain click to life and start spinning. Although the act of whipping a quill out of her saddlebags and scribbling on her napkin was a heck of a hint. “So if the average stallion would ejaculate, let’s say, two to two-point-five fluid ounces of semen--”

“Twilight, why in Equestria do you know a fact like that off the top of your--?”

“THEN, if he were twice the size of a normal stallion,” Twilight rapidly talked over her, “and if we assume semen production remains proportional, then liquid volume would octuple… then if he doubled in size again to get to four times normal size, liquid volume would octuple again, which gives us a range of one-hundred and twenty-eight to one-hundred and sixty fluid ounces--”

“Times two.”

“What?”

Rarity smiled amusedly. “For two penises, darling.”

“Rarity, an extra penis doesn’t necessarily indicate increased output, semen is produced in entirely separate parts of the reproductive syst--”

“Humor me, Twilight.”

Twilight let out a small huff. “Fine… optionally times two for an unconfirmed variable--”

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Oh, honestly…”

“--and with a little converting upwards, that gives us a final potential semen output range of…” Twilight blinked in surprise at her own work. “…anywhere from one to two-point-five gallons. Whoa.”

Rarity grinned. “Who’s exaggerating now, hm?”

“…Okay, fine, I’ll give you that one,” Twilight relented with another blush, “but sparkling? Since when does it sparkle?”

“Well, he does primarily eat gems,” Rarity reasoned. “And one’s diet does affect things like taste and texture… I’d imagine there’s quite a bit of essential minerals in his… ahem, love juices.”

“Eurgh, Rarity, semen is not some kind of facial cream.”

“Isn’t it?” Rarity countered, her smile growing.

Twilight was silent for a long moment, before recoiling and sticking out her tongue. “Eww, I didn’t mean it like that!”

Rarity laughed quietly. “Well, technically neither did I.”

Twilight frowned and raised a wary eyebrow at her. “You don’t… actually use it as a facial cream, do you?”

“Not quite…”

Twilight’s frown deepened as she gave Rarity a long, odd stare. “What… are you getting at, exactly?”

“Promise you won’t tell anypony?”

“…Of course, I wouldn’t… I mean, I assumed this entire conversation was meant to stay between us. And Spike, I guess, sort of.”

“Just making certain,” Rarity said. “Very well… you remember you were asking earlier about my beauty secrets?”

“Oh, because of the magazine? Yeah, I remember,” Twilight said, another curious stare appearing on her face. “But what does that have to do with--?”

“Everything.”

Twilight frowned again. “…I don’t follow. For that matter, wouldn’t getting yourself covered head to hoof in… that, make it harder to maintain whatever it is that gives you--?”

And then Twilight got it. Rarity could pinpoint the exact moment the light bulb clicked on, grinning as she watched Twilight’s eyes bug out and her cheeks turn beet red again. Rarity didn’t really blame her for being shocked, though. It was one heck of a secret.

“How… what… why?” Twilight mumbled.

“To be honest, I’m not one hundred percent certain of all the biological mechanics,” Rarity admitted. “I discovered it quite by accident, and I’m no scientist. But it started not terribly long after we first got together. Spike had released himself inside me the first few times we made love, which was nice not to have to worry about as far as getting pregnant, but of course he wasn’t going to do so every single time. So one day he happened to have me on my back and give my undercarriage a thorough blanketing, and… well, I wasn’t going to stop him if that appealed to him, of course, but privately I was lamenting how long it would probably take to clean up. I’m sure you’re aware how difficult it is normally to wash out a stallion’s semen just from fur, goddess forbid from your mane or tail…”

“Oh, er… I normally just use a cleaning spell…”

“…Yes, well, not all of us mares are quite so blessed with your magical prowess,” Rarity said with a small pout of jealousy.

“It’s not even that difficult of a spell--”

“Anyway,” Rarity went on, “afterward when I retreated to the bath I was relieved to find that in Spike’s case it washed off quite easily. So I stopped minding as much when he wanted to… coat me. And eventually I began to notice that my fur was looking extra sleek and shiny in certain places… specifically those where Spike most commonly enjoyed his climax. My face, my underbelly, my… ahem, my backside… and as time went on and finishing on me instead of in me became the norm, I realized I’d never looked better, so… we made a bit of a habit of it.”

Twilight’s face was so red it was almost purple, but she was listening with rapt attention again. “I… wow… I mean, I suppose I can see how it could be… at least a decent hair product, going strictly off the chemical composition of semen… but you wouldn’t generally have it in enough sheer volume to be practical. Which… I guess you’ve got covered now, but still, it wouldn’t normally be that effective. You really think… it’s because of his gemstone diet?”

“It’s the only explanation either of us can think of,” Rarity said, nodding. “It’s hardly scientifically proven, but I can’t argue with results. And as it’s not exactly a widely desirable source of essential minerals for a shiny mane and coat anyway, I decided to keep this particular beauty secret… well, a secret.”

“Wow…” Twilight marveled. “Rarity, that’s… kind of amazing. I mean, it’s seriously gross, but still pretty amazing…”

Rarity giggled a bit. “Oh, Twilight, when you really stop and think clinically about it, sex in general is rather gross. It’s sweaty and messy and you smell like you ran a marathon afterwards. But it’s still an incredible experience, is it not?”

“Heh… yeah, I guess it is,” Twilight admitted. “Especially when you have someone as special as Spike to share it with?”

“Oh, absolutely,” Rarity agreed, beaming. “Spikey makes any mess more than worth it.”

Twilight smiled back at her, but it was oddly distant this time. “Heh, you’re lucky you have someone so special in your life…”

Rarity’s own smile swiftly faded, catching the shift in Twilight’s tone and reading between the lines in an instant. “…Oh, Twilight, I apologize, I didn’t mean to flaunt my relationship--”

“I-it’s okay, really,” Twilight insisted. “I meant it, I’m glad you two are happy. It’s… it’s not your fault I haven’t had the best luck when it comes to relationships.”

“Well it’s not entirely your fault either,” Rarity assured her. “Being a Princess must make dating far more complicated.”

“Like you couldn’t imagine,” Twilight said, heaving a sigh. “And crushing on someone from another universe for a couple of years didn’t help…”

“I suppose not… but you know, he does have a more local counterpart in the royal guard whom I believe is still available.”

Twilight squirmed and blushed. “I know… and I… I guess he is cute…”

“Darling, I’d pass ‘cute’ and sail right on up to ‘handsome.’”

“Okay, yes, that too…” she admitted. “But it would be weird, wouldn’t it?”

“Only as weird as you make it, Twilight.”

“But I don’t know him at all, not really, he’s not--”

“Exactly. Try not to compare him to your old crush, Twilight. He’s not the same pony, and you don’t know him at all. But then that’s why ponies date in the first place, after all, so they can get to know each other, yes?”

“Mmmhh… well… I’ll think about it, I guess.”

“That’s all I ask,” Rarity said, smiling. “And if it makes you feel any better, despite my starry-eyed reminiscence just now, my relationship isn’t all sunshine and roses. Every relationship has its challenges, even years deep into marriage.”

Twilight’s head shot up at that, concern filling her gaze. “W-what? Oh no, are you and Spike having problems?”

“No, no, not exactly,” Rarity swiftly assured her. “We’re still quite happy. I only meant… well, it’s always going to be a bit of a challenge for us from now on, with being such dramatically different sizes…”

“Oh… yeah. Yeah, I guess that would make for some complications…”

“…And…” Rarity paused, leaning a bit over the table and lowering her voice. “May I be entirely honest with you, Twilight?”

“Of course,” Twilight said, leaning closer as well.

“…I wasn’t lying when I said Spike still satisfies me quite thoroughly… but…”

“But… what?”

“But truth be told, I do… miss it, sometimes. Being able to… do it properly.”

“…You do?”

Rarity nodded slowly. “Again, Spike has done a wonderful job of adapting, and I like to think I have too. But still… there’s something about feeling your bodies joined as one, holding one another in your arms as you feel the warmth of mutual climax…” Rarity heaved a soft, dreamy sigh. “It would be nice if we could go back to that. Just once.”

Twilight was silent for a long moment, staring at the table and blushing again. “…Do you… do you think Spike would like that too?”

“Oh, I have no doubt he would,” Rarity agreed. “He’d never admit it, but… well, I wasn’t the only one who was disappointed the day we found he couldn’t fit inside me anymore… why do you ask?”

Twilight bit her lip against a strange smile. “You remember how when I first asked if you two were still happy, intimately speaking, you told me I already knew the answer?”

“Yes…?”

“Well, you were right, but… I still looked into some options to help you out, just in case.”

Rarity’s heart rate jumped suddenly, and her eyes widened just a bit. “O-oh, did you…?”

“I did. And, well… heh, speaking of me and my magical prowess… did you know I know a shrinking spell?”

Rarity’s breath left her, eyes wide and mind racing.

A shrinking spell.

Spike could--

WE could--

Oh Twilight, how could we even begin to repay you for--

Oh.

OH.

Oh my, yes.

“Rarity? Are… are you okay?” Twilight asked.

“Fine… just fine, darling,” Rarity murmured. “Actually, I was just thinking… would you still care to… try my beauty secrets?”

Twilight swiftly turned red again. “W… w-what? You… you mean…?”

“Yes, Twilight… I do believe you and I can help each other…”