"Thank you all for attending to this very important first meeting of ours. I am grateful to have you all here today and I am proud to be the host of this meeting." Said Celestia with pride, commencing her opening speech.

As was usual with her speeches, minutes passed by without any signs of her stopping. If there was one thing Celestia was known for, it would have to be her being a gigantic chatterbox. Usually people found it quite funny. Only problem was that this time the great leaders of the world were in the same room as her and they couldn't just use the remote to switch channels when getting bored.

Minute after minute the room became more and more quiet. The audience had become quite...inventive over the course of her speech. There was Starlight who had 2 rubbers sticking out of her ears, helping her suppress Celestia's increasingly annoying voice. She was not the only one who had become quite annoyed by the ruler of Equestria though. Where Queen Chrysalis herself sat before was now a tiny rock. At least she didn't have to hear Celestia that way. Not all of the audience was that 'extreme' though, seeing how Sombra was smashing his head on the desk repeatedly.

...In hindsight, people probably were quite sick of Celestia.

However, against many popular expectations, Celestia's speech had eventually, finally, found an end. As her mouth closed, her eyes travelled across the room, seeing many of the sleepy, tired and murderous angry faces in the room. A 'normal' pony would most likely have been slightly scared or concerned because of those reactions to her speech, Celestia was no normal pony however and she kept a cool head as she usually did.

A short, rather sarcastic, applause sounded through the room before Celestia, once more, opened her cursed mouth. No doubt, it seemed like Sombra was about to stab himself with a crystal (which he had stolen from Cadance in the foyer) as she started once more. In an interview after the session he would say the following about the situation: "Why I was trying to stab myself? Well guess why, you nutjobs! I would love to see you stuck in a room with that thing for only 2 minutes." Sombra was taken to the local Police Department the same evening after a security guard detected the stolen crystal he had hidden beneath his tongue.

"So, let us beginn, no? I am open for proposals from anyone." She said into the room. It was like someone had suddenly switched the power back on as the different leaders in the room quickly began...um...let's call it 'debating', no?

"I demand the Crystal Empire back!" Shouted Sombra, slamming his stolen crystal into his desk with enough force to have it stuck in it.

"Equality!" Shouted Starlight from the other side of the room.

"Eternal Night!" Luna yelled from yet another corner of the room.

"Booooriiiing!" Discord yawned across the room, "Why not spice this meeting up a little?" He asked, followed by a quick snap of his fingers.

The others in the room were frightened as their pens and rubbers became spiders while their paperclips grew wings and flew around the room.
All the while, Discord himself jumped onto his desk, a microphone in his claws, and coughed briefly. "What's up with people saying Changelings are the masters of disguise? I mean, come on, they are so easy to look through!"

Chrysalis grumbled loudly at Discord as Starlight almost fell off her chair from laughing. Discord bowed before his audience as Celestia herself spoke up.

"Discord! Contain yourself!" She said in an almost ordering tone. Discord was not amused, yet he had to obey. The only alternative to obeying Celestia was an eternal stone prison in her garden and being pooped on by pigeons for centuries. As much as he despised Celestia, he had no choice but to reverse his spell.

He sighed annoyingly, followed by another snap of the finger. The countless pens and rubbers became inanimate again and the paperclips lost their wings and fell to the ground, one of them hitting Trixie on her head. She held her right hoof to where it had it her face, followed by a great and powerful grumble of hers TrixieLulamoonEnterprises™.

"Now," Celestia said, trying to re-establish order in the room, "You will all get your chance to talk, so there is no need to yell or interrupt anyone."

Most of the audience didn't seem very interested in what she was saying. Sombra for one was busy trying to get the crystal out of his desk, apparently it was stuck now.

"So, how about we start off with..." She went over the room from left to right, looking for a person to start with. She froze temporarily before leaning over to her left towards Luna and whispering: "Who invited the Bugbear?" Luna shrugged as they both looked over to the desk of the Bugbear. The wondersome creature was currently busy sniffing at its pen and, eventually, swallowing it whole.

Trixie didn't like sitting next to it. Nuff said.

Celestia coughed awkwardly as she resumed to choosing somepony. "Um...how about...Cadance!"

The princess in question stood at the back of the room, at the water cooler, currently busy getting some fresh water. At first she didn't realise the entire room was watching her when she poured the water into her cup and drank a sip.

Only then she looked up at the others that were watching her, raising an eyebrow in confusion and asking: "What? I'm thirsty too, you know."

"Do you have any proposal in mind for our session, Cadance?" Celestia asked. Starlight rose up from her chair before Cadance could answer.

"This is a meeting for Villains! She has no right to vote here!" Starlight rightfully exclaimed.

Cadance shrugged, still holding her cup of water in her right hoof. "Well..." She started, taking another sip, "I squashed a bug once."

The room looked at her in disapproval.

"Right." She said, taking a last sip out of her cup. "I, uh, think it's time for me to, uh, go." She said awkwardly, slowly stepping towards the exit next to her. The room was silent, yet the looks of the audience told her that she was better off leaving now rather than landing in hospital later on.

Celestia scratched the back of her head awkwardly. "Hehe, right then." She saw the judging eyes of the audience which began making even her nervous by now. "How about Sombra then?"

All eyes fell upon the grey-coated unicorn that was still busy trying to get his crystal out of the desk. Everyone watched in both awe and confusion as he pulled on it with all his might. Just when everyone started getting bored of the rather embarassing show, he succeeded and freed the crystal.

"Victory is mine! Haha!" He froze, looking around the room. "Oh. Excuse me." He gulped silently as he sat back down in the most gentle and polite way possible.

"Sombra...you know what I said, right?" Celestia asked with a sense of regret.

"Uh, yes! Yes, of course! Haha, I would have to be a damn idiot if I didn't." He gave out awkwardly.

Celestia ran a hoof to her face. "So you don't know?"

Sombra bit his lips for a moment. "Not really, no." He sank into his chair in shame.

Celestia sighed in annoyance. "Do you have any proposals to discuss for us?" She repeated to him.

"Ooooh..." Sombra gave out, "Why of course, first of-"

"You're not getting back the Crystal Empire..." Celestia interrupted.

Sombra froze as he held up one of his hooves. "Bollocks!" He exclaimed. "I thought we were here to discuss important matters?"

"Indeed we are, and that is most definitely not of importance."

Sombra became furious. "Oh yeah, for you it isn't! You don't have to live in the bloody frozen north now, do you? You have a warm home, food and a quiet place to sleep. I have none of that!"

"Wait..." Interrupted Starlight from Sombra's right. "You don't have food where you live? How are you even alive?"

Sombra shrugged. "This isn't canon."

Everyone in the room nodded understandingly at his statement, except for Discord. Discord promptly disappeared with a snap of the finger and reapparead next to Sombra, whispering into his left ear: "That's classified information."

Sombra turned around to him with a confused look. "But everyone in here seems to know anyway."

Discord covered Sombra's mouth as he said: "Yeees, but not them..."

Sombra had no time to reply as Discord disappeared once again.

Sombra coughed into his right hoof to regain attention. "Anyways." He began, "I said what I had to say and I demand to be treated fairly."

Celestia's right eye twitched for a second before she replied: "Fairly. Yes."

Celestia stared into the room with a tired look, her eyes twitching occasionally, making the others in front of her feel very uncomfortable. Luna, who sat next to Celestia, quickly took over for her though.

"I believe it is time for a tiny, little break!" She said as she guided Celestia off her podium, down the stage. "Try not to kill each other!" She said loudly, walking down the room towards the exit.

"Try not to mess things up even more." Luna whispered to Sombra as the two Princesses walked past him. Sombra raised an eyebrow and turned around at them, though they had already moved on by then.

Arriving outside, the two Princesses saw how a large group of press ponies was surrounding Cadance. They used the opportunity to sneak past all them, while all the while hearing Cadance repeatedly shout "I only drank a bloody cup of water! Leave me alone!" At them.

"Sooo..." Discord said as he popped up behind Queen Chrysalis.

"Sooo...?" Chrysalis asked in an annoyed voice.

"Looks like we've got some spare time on our hands..." He smiled at her. "Oh, im sorry, hooves."

Chrysalis was not amused. "What. Do you. Want." She demanded.

"Oh, if you want to get right to it..." He suddenly grew 5 additional pairs of arms and held corks in each of his hands. "I would be happy to fill some of your holes, dear."

Author's Notes:

To be continued...