Chapter 94

At last, the time had come. Time to return to work, to a normal life.

It was early Monday morning and Fluttershy was bustling around the house all-a-twitter, both nervous and excited about returning to the animal shelter. She had mentioned in passing that Pinkie Pie had invented a special word that combined those two emotions, and I although I was fairly certain the pink girl had used it around me herself, I couldn’t remember for the life of me what it was now. Regardless, life was waiting for us to rejoin its pleasant monotony, and we didn’t want to be late on our first day back.

During my long drive to work, I had become slightly apprehensive as I had neglected to tell Gord, my boss, that I was going to be heading abroad before Sunset and I set out to rescue Fluttershy, leaving him short one employee for a full six weeks—and without notice, to boot.

When I pulled up to the shop, I let my truck idle for a minute to let the turbos cool. I told myself while I waited that Gord was a reasonable guy, and that he would more-than-likely understand once I brought him up to speed on the situation. After a deep breath, I shut the engine off and was met with a sharp jerk when all that rotating iron suddenly fell dormant. Then, I jumped out and headed for the front office.

I stepped inside and was quickly greeted with that familiar smell of metal, rubber and exhaust, masked poorly by a pot of coffee sitting in the waiting area.

The counter was manned by a single person: a middle-aged man, and the only other licensed tech who still worked on the floor. He sat quietly behind the counter with his head down, filling out a fresh work order. After glancing up when he heard the door chime, he looked surprised for a moment, but quickly recovered with a waggish smirk.

He and I shared a playfully competitive relationship, often spending entire work days engaged in the whole ‘tough guy’ routine with one another, always trying to prove ourselves to be manlier than the other, usually by putting each other down in some way.

“Hey Jim.”

“Hey,” he greeted with a friendly chuckle. “Decided to come back and try working for a living again?”

I put my hands in my pockets and smirked. “Well, someone’s gotta be here to give you a hand; wouldn’t want you to break a nail or something.”

He shook his head, looking back down at the work order. “My nails were just fine without you here, Golds.”

“Oh OK,” I nodded. “Sorry about that. You still look like a pansy, so I just figured…”

Jim continued to write silently for a moment or two, but then he stopped and looked up at me again with a smart-assed grin on his face. “Wait, I thought you were the one who looks like a total pussy?” he jabbed, pointing at me with his pen.

I shrugged dismissively and looked down at the floor. “Yeah well…you are what you eat, I guess.”

Jim guffawed loudly. He was one of those guys who had a very loud, raspy laugh; the kind that can be heard from the far side of a restaurant, drowning out the person you’re talking to, even when they’re sitting right next to you.

Just then, the gruff voice of Gord came from the office to the right of the counter.

“Hey Jim, is that Golds’ voice I hear?”

“Unfortunately,” Jim replied, to which I snickered quietly.

“Send him in here, would ya?”

Jim looked at me and tipped his head toward the office. “Gord wants to see you.”

“No shit, Jim.” I rolled my eyes. “I’m right here. I heard the whole thing.”

Jim held his hands up, glaring at me from under his brows. “Now, hold on! I just wanted to make sure you understood,” he said in a patronizing tone, followed by an instigating smile and a chuckle.

“Yeah-yeah,” I replied as I rounded the corner to the office doorway to find my boss sitting behind his desk, leaned back in his chair.

Unlike Jim, he didn’t smile. “Hi. Have a seat, tough guy.”

I did as requested and sat in the chair across from him, and we stared at each other over the desk for a few moments.

“Didn’t expect to see you here,” he finally said.

I shrugged and folded my hands between my knees. “Something came up,” I sighed. “Something important.”

Gord nodded. “Did that something have anything to do with that agent sniffing around here last spring?”

“Yeah,” I muttered, studying the dirty tiles under my feet. “He came back.” I paused to chew the inside of my cheek. “And uh, this time he...kidnapped my girlfriend.”

The old man raised a brow.

“I uh…I had to go find her,” I explained. “I was all over the states; Virginia, DC, Vegas, California, Arizona…” I shook my head after trailing off.

“I take it she’s back, safe and sound?” he asked, fillling the short silence.

“Yeah, she’s going back to work today, actually; same as me,” I chuckled.

“Hm,” he sighed, glancing down at the papers on his desk. “Good.”

I ground my teeth for a moment, wondering what he was thinking. “Look, I um…I’m sorry I didn’t let you know what was going on before I left. It happened on a Sunday, and me and a friend of mine pretty much had to leave straight away to get her ba-”

Gord raised his hand, stopping me. “Look, it’s fine. I know you have these kinds of things that...come up every so often, and I really can’t hold that against you. But…you were gone so long this time, I’m afraid I had to replace you.”

I sat motionless for a moment, my mouth hanging open. “Oh…”

Gord nodded and cleared his throat, glancing down at his desk. “Yeah.” He exhaled slowly. “I mean, it got busy and we couldn’t keep up without you, so…I did what I had to do.”

“Right…” I paused, cocking my head. “So, when you say you ‘replaced’ me…does that mean that I’m…out of the job?”

“’Fraid so, tough guy.”

I sighed through my nose, chewing my bottom lip. This was unexpected; granted, on the way here I was pretty nervous about this conversation, but I really didn’t expect it to come to this. “Um, you wouldn’t be willing to consider keeping us both on, would you?”

He shook his head. “Can’t, sorry. It’s not busy enough now to justify an extra full time wage.”

“Hm.” I hung my head and then raised my brows, wondering what I was going to do for the rest of the day…and the week. And so on.

“Wow.”

“Look,” Gord said, raising a hand. “It’s nothing personal; I have a business to run, and I needed someone on the floor to get things done. Jim just couldn’t keep up by himself.”

“Oh…no, it…it’s fine. I…um-“

“And it’s not like I don’t appreciate what you did for me, tough guy; you saved my life and I’ll never forget it, but...I can’t keep having you disappear like this all the time.” Gord paused to adjust his position in the chair. “Ever since you met those girls, you’ve had your head in the clouds, and you’ve missed a fair bit of work because of it. I did what I had to do, and to be honest, this young buck I’ve got working for me now is doing OK. I really don’t want to kick him to the curb just because you’re back. Know what I mean?”

I nodded quickly and gulped, trying my best to look nonchalant. “Absolutely. I-I totally get where you’re coming from, Gord. Heh, you know me: I’ve been around a long time; I get how business works.”

Gord forced a smile, then sighed, looking down at the stack of papers on his desk while I continued.

“And as far as the whole ‘saving your life’ thing, it’s fine. I never considered you to be in any kind of debt to me, and I didn’t take the job because I needed the money; it was more that I needed a way to spend my time—to have a sense of purpose.”

“I know,” Gord nodded. “And you’re a great tech and a good worker, don’t get me wrong; but it sounds to me like those lady-friends of yours will be keeping you plenty busy, at least for a while.”

“Yeah…that they will.” I began to chuckle, but then something else came to mind. “Uh…actually Gord, the other perk of working here was being able to use the dealer plate to drive my truck, you know…since I have a hard time with getting it licensed on my own. Uh, I don’t suppose that I could keep-“

Gord shook his head immediately. “Absolutely not.”

I paused, stunned by the fast reply. A weight quickly appeared in the pit of my stomach when it dawned on me that I wasn’t going to be able to drive my beloved machine anymore. “Um…I…wow, what-“

“Here.” The old man picked up a stack of papers and held them out to me.

“What’s this?” I asked, taking and leafing through the pages.

“Automated speeding tickets.” Gord answered sharply. “You know, the kind that get issued by traffic cameras and so on; all of these fines are issued to MY dealer plate, which happens to be bolted to a certain ’94 Dodge diesel pickup…”

My jaw clenched suddenly. Rare!

“You know, up ‘til now, I never had a problem with you using my plate, but this…” —the old man shook his head— “this cost me an awful lot of money...and headaches. I don’t know what kind of shenanigans you were getting into —and I don’t care, to be honest— but I can’t have you running around like that with my dealer plate, under my insurance.”

“Fuck…” I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Sorry Gord. It wasn’t me who was driving it; I left my truck at home when I was gone and…one of the girls borrowed it.”

He folded his hands on the desk and stared at me, running his tongue along the inside of his bottom lip. “Well, FYI: she’s got a lead foot, tough guy.”

*****

Shaking my head, I walked into the shop. I was no longer employed here, and I decided I might as well load up my tool box since I had one last chance to use my truck before Gord took his plate back.

Before leaving his office after a cordial handshake, he told me a little bit about the new guy: he was young, not quite licensed, in fact; he was still in the third year of his apprenticeship, but seemed fairly competent with his work, although he had nowhere near the experience that Jim and I had. Apparently, the young man had completed the first two years of his apprenticeship a while back and had left the trade for a time, but had recently decided to come back to complete the rest of his hours so he could write his certification.

And apparently he was foreign?

I couldn’t remember where Gord said he was from, but he supposedly had a fairly strong accent and a little bit of a temper.

As I made my way to my toolbox, I noticed him working in my bay; he had a car on the hoist with the rear wheels removed.

I decided to say hi to him.

I approached him from the side and paused to watch him pick away at removing a brake drum. He was a fairly big fellow, dressed in typical shop attire, but he had an uncharacteristic head of hair: a pile of light-brown dreadlocks hung down around his shoulders and across his forehead, covering his eyes, making me wonder how he was able to see what he was doing.

I cleared my throat. “Uh, hi…Rutherford, is it?”

He stopped what he was doing suddenly and turned to give me a deadpanned stare. Actually, all I could see was his chin, mouth and nose; his eyes and brows were covered, hiding their expression, so technically, it was only two thirds of a deadpanned stare.

“Uh…I’m Golds.” I held my hand out for a shake.

He didn’t move.

After a short, awkward wait, I gave up and put my hands in my pockets. “Looks like you’re my replacement,” I said, chuckling.

He continued to glare at me with the most indifferent of indifference, then he simply turned his back and continued working.

“Hm.” With a sigh, I slipped past him to head to my toolbox.

I glanced back as I passed, noticing that he seemed to be struggling with removing the drum. After decades of teaching countless up and coming mechanics, the natural instinct to offer some help kicked in.

“The shoes are hung up on the rust ridge there, bud, that’s why it’s giving you so much grief.”

The young tech stopped for half a second, let out a frustrated grunt, and then continued to pry on the brake drum.

I paused for a second to watch him, knowing that some young guys would rather keep on truckin the way they want, no matter what you tell them, but I could see that he was going to end up breaking a retainer if he forced that drum much more.

I cleared my throat and pointed behind the hub, making him stop and give me a frustrated look. “You know, there’s a rubber plug in the back-plate here; you can just pop that out and reach in with a screwdriver and adjust the shoes down, then the drum will just slip right o-“

I was interrupted by the sound of Rutherford’s pry bars slamming onto his tool cart, then my field of vision was filled with nothing but his face.

“APPRENTICE KNOWS WHAT TO DO! RUTHERFORD DON’T NEED HELP FROM WASHED-UP TECH WHO GOT FIRED FROM THIS PLACE! APPRENTICE CAN GET DRUM OFF ALL BY HIMSELF! APPRENTICE DON’T NEED ANY HELP!”

He spun around and snatched a large hammer from his tool cart and swung it at the brake drum with a loud BANG, followed by another, then another…and another.

Stunned by the rage-fest, I retreated a step and watched in wid-eyed disbelief.

Holy shit...

Rutherford wailed ruthlessly on the poor car; his hair came away from his face with each swing, allowing me several fleeting glimpses of his bloodshot eyes as he hammered the brake drum so hard the entire car jiggled like it might fall off the hoist.

With a loud grunt and a final swing, the drum cracked in half and fell to the floor with two heavy clunks, cloaked in a cloud of black dust. The young tech stood there with gritted teeth, panting and snorting through his nose, surveying his handy-work.

I really wanted to break him in half.

Instead, I made a little ‘hm’ sound and chewed the inside of my cheek as I stepped closer to inspect the damage. I let out a whistle and shook my head before glancing at Rutherford, who was already beginning to look regretful. “Wow,” I said, looking back at the hub, “well, I’ll just go tell Gord that you need a new drum and three new studs…and that he’ll have to pay for it since we caused the damage.”

Rutherford grumbled something to himself and tossed the hammer on his cart while I turned to look at my toolbox again, ruminating in silence. Hmm…maybe I should just leave my stuff here; looks like I might be getting a call to come back before long.

*****

“Oh NO!” Fluttershy gasped, covering her mouth with her fingertips.

“Darling! You…you lost your job!?”

I was silent, seated at the table with an empty dinner plate before me. Rarity and Fluttershy sat on both sides of me, their faces aghast after I told them what had happened that day. I stared at the plate and nodded. “Yyyyyup.” I said, followed by another long sigh.

“But…b-but how can he do that?” Rarity asked in a voice that was about an octave higher than normal. “He’s…I-I thought you saved his life?“

“I did.”

“Well…I mean, that’s…that is certainly some way of showing his gratitude!” the fashionista huffed.

I groaned, rubbing my forehead. “No…Rare, it’s his right to choose who he wants to work for him. Just because I saved his life doesn’t change that.” I glanced at Rarity to see her temple propped against her palm, her elbow resting on the table. “Besides, he was short-staffed; he did what he had to do. You’re a business-woman, Rare, think about it: if Coco disappeared without notice for over a month and you got really busy, what would you do?”

She sighed, and then paused. “I would have to hire someone,” she answered reluctantly. “I would have no choice.”

“Exactly,” I replied. “And to be honest, I never felt like he owed me anything just because I saved him; it was his choice to offer me work, and I took it because I needed something to do.”

There was a pause in the conversation. The three of us stared at the table top and sighed in unison.

"It just...it bugs me that he preferred to keep that new kid over me," I confessed. "Like...he's not even licenced yet, and he's...kind of an ass."

"An ass? What do you mean, darling? What did he do?"

"Well," I huffed, "when I was there, I tried to introduce myself to him and he pretty much ignored me, and then when I noticed he was having trouble getting that brake drum off, I tried to offer him some help and he starts yackin’ at me about how he knows what he's doing and doesn't need any help; so then he grabbed his hammer and went ape-shit on that lady's car and damaged a bunch of shit, and I was just like: 'what the fuck is this guy's problem?'"

"Hm," Rarity grimaced, "well, that certainly isn’t much of an attitude to have, is it?"

I shook my head. "No...and that's why I left my tools there, because I know sooner or later that kid's gonna hang himself, and Gord'll be calling me back."

Rarity sighed, then stuck her nose up. "Well that may be, darling, but you shouldn't rely on that. I would suggest you start looking for a new job as early as tomorrow, that way you-"

"I can't, Rare," I cut in, shaking my head. "I would have to find a place willing to employ someone without an actual mechanic's licence AND who'll pay me under the table. Because I don't actually have a social insurance number, I don't even exist in the government's eyes, so I can't get a job where I'm officially on the books. You know what I’m saying?"

"Hm..." Rarity moped, biting her lip.

After a moment, Fluttershy buried her face in her hands and moaned softly. “Ohh…I’m so sorry, Goldie; you really liked working there, and n-now you can't…and it’s all because of me!”

Surprised and confused, Rarity and I both turned to look at the shy girl.

“Because of you? Fluttershy, what sort of madness is this?” Rarity asked with a scowl.

“Because he had to come find me,” Fluttershy replied. “If I hadn’t let myself get captured-“

“No.” I put my hand up to stop her. “Flutters, you can’t keep kicking yourself in the ass for that, OK? It wasn’t your fault, and neither is this.”

Fluttershy looked down at the table, rubbing her arm. “I…still, I’m...really sorry you lost your job.”

I put my arm around the shy girl and pulled her close. The last thing I wanted was for her to feel bad. “I know, Flutters. Thanks. I’ll be fine though.”

Rarity folded her arms on the table and lowered her head, resting her chin on her forearm.

Fluttershy nuzzled her cheek into my shoulder. “But...I don’t want to you to be sad, Goldie.” She paused for a moment. “Um, w-what can we do to cheer you up?”

I shrugged the opposite shoulder. “I don’t really know.”

Fluttershy sighed. “Hmmm…” she mused as she traced her fingertips along my forearm. “How about…we play that game where me and Rare take turns riding you? You know the one: where we switch every thirty seconds until we see who gets your cum?”

Rarity perked up. “Ooh! That’s a splendid idea, Fluttershy!” she agreed, looking at me with an enthused smile. “I bet a game of ‘Ridin’ Roulette’ would be just what the doctor ordered, wouldn’t you say, darling?”

I furrowed my brows a bit. “Ummm…”

“And…um, we could up the stakes this time,” Fluttershy suggested. “How about, maybe, um…afterwards, you could watch the loser eat the cum out of the winner?”

Rarity gasped, her eyes widening. “Oh my…darling, that is an absolutely wicked idea! What do you think, Golds?” she asked, giving me a dainty tap on the shoulder.

I had to admit it was tempting, but there was a prevailing weight in the pit of my stomach that I couldn’t shake, and I knew it would keep me from truly enjoying myself with them. “Mm, it’s nice of you to offer, but I’m not really in the mood for that kind of thing right now.”

Both of them looked surprised and concerned that I would have turned down such a proposition.

“Um…I-I understand, Goldie,” Fluttershy replied, giving my hand a squeeze. “It’s OK if you just wanted to talk, or...snuggle with us.”

Rarity sighed, but then leapt from her seat suddenly. “Darling, I’ve got just the thing!” she said as she made her way to the fridge freezer with a confident stride.

“Ugh…you’d better not be offering me one of those mini-freezies,” I mumbled, watching her open the freezer door.

“Heavens no, darling! Those are disgusting,” the fashionista replied as she pulled a tub of ice cream from the freezer.

“I like the Arby’s sauce…” Fluttershy mumbled under her breath, scowling.

Oblivious to the shy girl’s comment, Rarity plopped the frost-covered tub onto the table and looked at me sideways with her eyebrows raised and smiling mouth open, like she was presenting a game show prize.

I stared at the label for a moment. Rocky road… Again, that feeling of lead in the pit of my stomach made the decision for me. “Thanks Rare, but no thanks.”

Defeated, Rarity’s face went blank and her shoulders slumped. “Oh…well, alright then,” she sighed.

I cleared my throat. “You know what might cheer me up?”

They both watched me, waiting for the answer.

“A nice, long drive in my truck.”

Rarity and Fluttershy’s brows rose in unison.

“Well, go then, darling!” She waved towards the front door. “Don’t stay here on our account, do what makes you happy!”

“U-unless you want us to come with you…” Fluttershy offered quietly.

“Guys, I can’t go. My plates are gone.”

They stared vacantly.

“What do you mean, gone?” Rarity asked, confused.

I shook my head. “That truck was never registered to me,” I explained, “I’ve been driving it with one of the dealer plates from work; I couldn’t put my own plates on it because, again, according to the Canadian Government, I don’t actually exist.”

“Oh dear.” Rarity put her fingertips to her cheeks. “And…your boss wouldn’t let you keep it?”

“No,” I snorted. “Why would he? I’m not working for him anymore. That was the main perk of working there; some of my earnings went into paying the insurance on that plate so its cost was covered, but now that I’m gone, he’s not just gonna let me keep it and pay my way to drive around with it. Especially after all the speeding tickets.”

Rarity froze, her eyes wide with horror. “Er…um…tickets?” she squeaked.

With a huff, I left my seat and headed for the coat rack, where I pulled a wad of papers from my jacket. I came back to the table and slapped the stack down in front of the fashionista, whose eyes dropped and scanned the papers.

“W-what is this?”

“Photocopies of automated speeding tickets, issued to my boss’s plate, which was bolted to my truck; all issued during the month of October—while I was away.”

“Oh dear,” Fluttershy gasped, shifting away from me and Rarity.

“Ohhhh shit…” Rarity whispered as her eyes darted around the papers. “D-did you say… automated tickets? As in…?”

“Yeah. You don’t get pulled over, you get caught speeding on camera and they mail the tickets to whoever the plates are registered to.”

Rarity cringed. “So...your boss?”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Over four thousand dollars worth of fines —which I paid him back for with the cash left over from the trip— but that wasn’t good enough in his eyes.”

“But…why not? If you paid him back-”

“Cuz his insurance company jacked his rates because of this, so this whole thing is gonna continue to cost him money as long as he’s running that shop.”

A silent Rarity paused, nibbling her lip as she stared in horror at the papers.

“It was one thing to roast my tires off, Rare, but this…” I shook my head.

Rarity drew a tiny gasp, shifting her attention from the papers to me. “Darling…are you…upset with me?”

I paused and looked away. Her face was too pretty for me to be able to say what I needed to, so I had to remove it from my sight. I clenched my fist in front of my chin, taking a deep breath. “I’m…trying not to be, Rare. I don’t want to be, but…”

Her eyes widened when I trailed off. “Ohh…you are!” Sobbing, she tore the lid from the ice cream tub, grabbed the spoon from her dinner plate and plucked out a massive scoop of the dessert.

“Oh Rare…” Fluttershy shook her head, watching her girlfriend shove the entire spoonful of ice cream into her mouth.

“Rare, just…relax,” I said. “I’m not that mad at you, I just-“

She gulped down the mouthful of melted treat to cut me off. “You are so! And I deserve iiiiiit!”

“Ugh…” I groaned, shaking my head. “Come on, Rare.”

“No, it’s true!” she cried. “I’ve been such a twat! I should never have taken your truck; everyone else told me it was a bad idea, but I didn’t listen, and now I can see that they were right ALL ALONG!”

“It’s not that you borrowed it,” I said, trying to console her. “It’s just that-“

“I drove recklessly!” she said, holding the spoon up, which was loaded with another bite. “I know! I was irresponsible, and disrespectful, and I deserve to be scorned!”

“Um…Rare? Y-you really should tone the drama down a bit,” Fluttershy whispered.

“But it’s true!” Rarity cried, stabbing the spoon into the ice cream and leaving it there. “I messed up, darling, and I feel simply dreadful about it; I’ve affected your relationship with your boss, you’ve lost your truck, and my selfishness has needlessly cost everyone money!” She quickly made her way around the table with her arms outstretched. “Please...forgive me, darling!” she begged, wrapping her arms around me and burying her wet face in the crook of my neck, sobbing noisily.

I turned to face Fluttershy with a deadpanned stare.

Fluttershy smirked and turned away to hide it, clearly amused by Rarity’s drama.

“I’m so sorry,” Rarity continued, much to my dismay. “I don’t know what got into me! I just couldn’t help myself. It was so enjoyable to drive; so deceptively fast and powerful, just like you! It was all I had left; with you two gone, it was the only thing left that made me feel like I wasn’t so…completely alone.”

The shy girl’s smirk disappeared and she looked back at me, disheartened by what Rarity said.

I returned the look, feeling a twinge of pity for the fashionista. I had forgotten about her time at home; how alone she must have felt, and how much she must have missed us.

Her fixation on my truck suddenly made more sense now.

I put my arm around her and rubbed her back. “Shh…it’s fine Rare. I love you. And don’t worry, OK? I’m not mad at you.”

She lifted her head to gaze at me with a black-streaked face, some relief showing in her eyes. “You…really?”

I nodded and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “Yeah.”

“Ohh,” she closed her eyes and whimpered, wiping the dark streak of moisture from her cheek as her lips curled upward a bit, struggling to form a smile. “I…I love you too, darling. And…I promise I’ll make this up to you, any way I can.”

“Don’t worry about it, Rare.”

“No, I insist,” she said, grabbing a handful of my shirt to pull me closer. “I simply cannot leave things the way they are. I…we will not rest until you are happy again, isn’t that right Fluttershy?” she asked, leaning over to see the shy girl’s response.

“Mm-hm!” Fluttershy nodded in agreement.

Rarity continued with refreshed enthusiasm. “No man of ours is going to be left unhappy; not so long as I have any say in it!” She gave a short pause to rub her chin thoughtfully. “How about this?” she asked, perking up. “I know you said you weren’t in the mood, b-but hear me out —we could even take a rain-check on this if you want— but um…what if I were to let you,” —she licked her lips— “er...punish me?”

I furrowed my brows; my eyes shifted to the left, and then to the right. “What?”

“Like the night you came home, with Sunset! You remember, don't you? Just like that! I-if you want, you can hold me down and rail the piss out of me all night long, hahaha! Hahaha! And…if you wanted to do it tonight, I could even leave these mascara marks on my cheeks, s-so it looks like I’ve been crying from being fucked so hard!”

I gave my head a quick shake and stared at her in disbelief. “Rare, what the fff...that's fucking psychotic!“

“YOU CAN CUM ANYWHERE YOU LIKE!” she screeched, grabbing my arm. “I-in my mouth, or...on my face…or or, i-in my fanny, perhaps? OOH!” —her eyes lit up suddenly— “I’ll even let you cum in my hair! Think of it, darling; that, with me, is truly the holy grail of taboos; such an opportunity only presents itself once in a-“

I put my hand up to stop her. “Whoa! OK, seriously…Rare, just...wow, that...I mean, you’re a sweetheart for offering —don't get me wrong— but I’m not sure if any of that is actually gonna help me.”

“Well, of course it won’t solve your employment issues, darling! T’would be foolish of me to assume so; I was simply trying to show you that there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, and, I mean…those were only suggestions, that’s all. I would be more than willing to entertain any ideas you may have for me.” She leaned over again to speak to Fluttershy. “How about you, sweetie? What do you think?”

“I say cum in her bum, Goldie. She’s been bad!”

Shocked, I turned to face the shy girl, who had clamped onto my arm and was staring at me with devilish eyes.

“OK…no,” I shook my head and pointed at the shy girl. “First off, YOU need to settle down, and you” —I turned back to Rarity— “you can’t go around thinking you can solve life’s problems by letting people cum in your hair…OR your ass.”

Rarity rolled her eyes and huffed. “Fine.” She folded her arms. “But know this: I will NOT stop until I make this right.”

“Me too,” Fluttershy spoke up. “We just want you to be happy, Goldie. It makes me sad knowing you're sad.”

“It’s settled then,” Rarity resolved. “This is our new mission, Fluttershy: we shall not stop until we make things right for our dear Mr. Arrow here.”

“Deal!” Fluttershy replied, reaching past me to offer a handshake, which Rarity accepted, sealing the contract. They both closed in on me next, planting a kiss on each of my cheeks, which I have to admit made me feel pretty warm and fuzzy inside.