Woah, definitely wasn’t expecting this.

I was sitting in a rather well organized office, with a man wearing a skull hat and a Polka Dot covered business suit, which was weird enough without the snaggletooth and mismatched horns growing on his head. After a few seconds of silence, I decided to see if I could still speak.

“Um, thanks, I guess, for pulling me out of there. But who are you?” I asked.

“Discord, spirit of chaos, though a better question is how did you get out of the realm of darkness?” he said

“Don’t know. One minute the darkness was consuming me, then I heard a voice, then I was in what Umbra called my Dive to the Heart. And I thought it was called the Dark Zone.” I replied.

“Different worlds call it different things, the void between worlds has many names, the dark zone, the darkness, the void, but... It’s been so long since I’ve heard that term, ‘dive to the heart,’ anyway, what did this voice say? Oh, wait, before that, would you care for a beverage?” He asked, snapping his fingers. Suddenly, a glass of a brown liquid appeared in front of me in a glass.

“Thanks.” I said, trying to grip the glass, though it was kinda difficult with hooves. How do they do it? I thought as I repeatedly failed to grasp it several times. Discord noticed my plight, and said flatly, “Straw?”

I nodded, and a silly straw manifested itself in the glass. “Thanks, again.” I said, before slurping the chocolate milk through the straw.

“So then, what did this voice say?”

“It said it wasn’t my time, that I had a reason to stay, though there was a cost. I had to give up my human form, and my sword, meaning I apparently lost the one thing that allowed me to control my powers when I used them. In exchange, I got this weird weapon shaped like a key. Umbra called it a keyblade. Then he ran off, then the voice showed up again and told me I had to find Lumos and Malum before Umbra and Akumu did. That’s when you showed up and brought me here.”

“I see, and then what happened?”

“Then I asked your name, you told me, you gave me some chocolate milk, and it’s awesome by the way, I couldn’t grip it so you gave me a straw, and here we are.” I said.

“Interesting... Anyway, off you go, there are people and ponies waiting.” He said.

“Wait, I have a question.”

He sighed, “Yes?”

“Why? Why did you save me? I don’t mean to be rude, but I don’t understand why.” I said.

“I made a deal, if you got out, I got to be free again.”

“I see. So it’s a chance at redemption, if you will.”

“You could see it as that, now, out you go!” He said, snapping his fingers, and the world disappeared around me...
__________________________________________________________________

My vision was blurry, but I could just make out the familiar sight of the Canterlot Gardens. I only had a second to take it in before I was tackled by two blurs, one black and yellow, the other midnight blue.

I heard a chuckle, followed by a voice saying “No brakes on the rape train.”

“Shut up Ven.” Die said, briefly turning to flip him the bird, before slapping me, then embracing me again. “You idiot. Don’t ever do anything like that again, you hear me?” She said, and I could make out the tears as my vision cleared up, thanks to her slap, as much as I hate to admit it.

“Got it sis.” I said, smiling.

“So, what happened in there? Where is Lumos?” Clare asked.

“Lumos’ darkness won. He became separated into what he called a ‘heartless’ and a ‘Nobody’. The heartless called itself Umbra. I don’t know what the Nobody is called, since Umbra said it was sent to a random place depending on what kind of Nobody he became. The same for Mirum and Malum. Mirum is a heartless now, and Malum is a nobody. Oh, and Akumu’s been separated from me and is with Umbra right now.” I said, completely calm the whole time.

“Wait, wouldn’t that make you a nobody as well?” Asked Ven.

“No. There was a voice, it let me keep my heart, but I had to give up my human form, and my sword, and with them, my control over the powers of the Lunar Orb. In exchange, I got this.” I said, removing myself from Luna and Die’s embrace, summoning my keyblade and levitating it in front of me, thankful that I at least could still use telekinesis safely. Ven’s eyes widened a dramatic amount upon seeing this.

“Do you even know what that is?!?!” He asked, nearly a shout.

“Yes. I do. It’s a keyblade. Umbra told me what it can do, how it’s the only weapon that can defeat a heartless. It’s called Blackout Prizm.” I replied.

“Yeah, that about sums it up. So did the voice say anything notable?”

“Yeah. It said we had to go and find Lumos and Malum’s nobodies before Umbra and Akumu do.”

“Wait,” Clare said, “Why would Umbra and Akumu go after Lumos and Malum, and what about the other one... Mirum, was it?”

“It’s actually very simple Clare. Umbra and Akumu seek to destroy their Nobodies to prevent them from regaining their hearts, and as for Mirum,” I hung my head sadly. “The voice said we probably can’t save him.”

“Well,” Ven said, “As long as Organization 13 doesn’t find them...”

“Yeah, Umbra mentioned them as well.” I said. “He didn’t go into too much detail, just said they were the strongest nobodies around, the only ones who keep their old forms.”

“Yeah, thats one part of it, they are a group of thirteen nobodies, thirteen who didn’t transform, other than number 13, who was a fraction of two different people. I’m getting off track, anyway, the point is that they use keyblade wielders to hunt heartless, so they can use the released hearts to create a thing called ‘Kingdom Hearts.’”

“So, we need to find Lumos and Malum before these ‘Organization 13’ creeps do, and help them get their hearts back.”

“Well, if they joined the organization, then two things could happen that i know of: first, they complete kingdom hearts and both become whole, and leave the ‘world that never was.’ or they become two of the thirteen ‘darknesses.’ That are meant to start a huge war.”

“War?” I asked, the word shocking me a little.

“I don’t really know the details, but for a thing known the ‘keyblade war’ to start, there are meant to be 13 ‘darknesses’ which all hold one soul, the soul of the #1 of the organization, and seven different ‘lights,’ which I think are keyblade wielders, unless that storyline has already happened in this world.”

“I see. So we’ll not only be trying to find and rescue, Lumos, Malum, and Mirum if possible, but we’ll also be trying to prevent a war?” I asked with a raised eyebrow. “Sounds good to me.”

“The last part is a maybe on whether or not we have to, as that storyline might have already happened. But yes.” Ven said nonchalantly.

“Wait wait wait, are you saying that you are going to try and stop a war?” Luna asked. “ABSOLUTELY NOT! You’ve almost died three times already, you are not going to tempt fate any further!” She yelled.

“Luna,” Ven said, with an air of seriousness that normally isn’t there, “You don’t understand, this war will affect ALL worlds, and could very well end them. Every last one.”

“But Noctis almost died again. I’ve already lost so many friends through my life. I can’t lose another. I can’t.” She said, wrapping her hooves around me again. I just wrapped my own around her and returned the hug, trying to stay calm despite the situation. Eventually, I managed to assure her that I wouldn’t leave her, and she released me, still sobbing a little.

“Honestly, I don’t know how we would even get off this world...” Ven said, looking deep in thought.

“I think I could help out a bit there.” A familiar voice said from above me.

“Hey, Discord. I was wondering where you went.” I said, smiling despite the bone-crushing hug I had received. “So, why’d you come back?”

“Eh, I was just in the neighbourhood, and happened to overhear.” he said with a shrug.

“So, you can help us out? That would be awesome.” I said.

Clare, who had been silent until this point, spoke up, saying “Why is it I’m the only one who isn’t following what’s happening?”

“Don’t worry, you aren’t.” said Erahaor, who was standing a few feet away.

“Ok, I’ll sum it up for you.” I said. “Discord saved my flank by pulling me out of my DtH into a pocket world, then he sent me here, we talked, got frustrated about being unable to travel to other worlds to find Lumos, Mirum and Malum, and Discord showed up again, offering to help us out. Does that sum it up for you Clare, Era.” I said smugly.

Clare blinked a few times, before saying, “Yeah, it does.”

“Ok then. So, Discord, do you mind if I call you Dizzy?” I asked.

“I mind, yes, but if you want, I can’t stop you from calling me it.”

“Ok. Well, are there any nicknames you do like? I won’t call you one you don’t like going by.” I said.

He looked deep in thought for a moment, before looking up, and saying, “Nnope!”

“Ok then. Well, how can you help us?”

“I pulled you into a side dimension. I think I can handle moving you from one world to another.”

“Good point. So, have you been to any worlds other than this one before?” I asked curiously.

“Lots, I’ve watched tons of worlds, such as the one Lumos, Clare, Ventus, and several other humans were on before, their Equis.”

“Cool. So, how would it work anyway? Do you just snap your fingers and open a portal to another world?”

Discord scoffed, “Oh, please, that's too mainstream, we’re taking the Swagwagon.” He said with a joyful tone.

“Swagwagon?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.

Discord snapped his fingers, and a large ship appeared above us, “Yes, the Swagwagon battleship.” He said smugly

“Woah. Cool.” I said, staring at the ship. “Is that a chocolate fountain mast?” I asked, confused.

“Why don’t you see for yourselves?” he asked, obviously proud of the ship.

“Don’t mind if I do!” Ven said, flying to the ship.

“Be careful of the-” discord began before Ven crashed into something, “... force field.” he finished.

Ven slid slowly down the field around the ship, before falling off it and catching himself after falling a few feet. I almost doubled over laughing.

“So... how do we get on then?” Clare asked, curiously.

“Teleportation.” Discord said.

“Thats simple... especially for someone who often speaks in riddles.” Ven said, Discord simply shrugged.

“Oh shut up and go make-out with Die.” I said, receiving a hard punch from my now blushing sister for my trouble.

Ven glared at me, “Shush, nobody needs to know that.”

I stared at him, wide-eyed. “You actually did!? Ha, I knew you two liked each other!” I shouted triumphantly.

Ven blushed, and a small whirlwind appeared around him, followed by him flying off at amazing speeds.

“Wow, I didn’t think he’d be that embarassed.” I said.

“Well you just revealed he had a crush on your sister, from what I’ve seen, he normally doesn’t talk about anything personal really.” Clare said, seemingly bored.

“So, he keeps to himself? How did he end up falling for Die, anyway? Was it a love at first sight thing or what?”

“I honestly don’t know, as you just put it, he keeps to himself about that kind of thing. Although I did notice her sneaking glances at her shortly after the battle with Akumu.”

“I see. I should go apologize, huh?”

“Nah, he’ll get over it,” she lowered her voice, “Besides, now Die knows he has feelings for her as well.”

“Uh, I think she already knew. After all, he did technically admit that he made out with her, though that may just have been male exaggerated bragging.” I replied.

“Hmm... I haven’t really seen much of them for the last couple days, so it’s possible they actually were...” She looked deep in thought, “Also, why did it take Discord 2 days to find you?”

It took a few seconds for me to register this information. “WHAT!? I’VE BEEN GONE FOR TWO DAYS!?” I yelled.

“Yeah, Luna spent most of it staying out here, just waiting.”

“But, I thought it was only a few hours. What the hell!?”

“Well, different worlds should have different passing of time, shouldn’t they? It’s possible you’ve only been gone from your world for less than a second in their time.”

“Hmmm. Hey, Discord, can you travel through time as well as space?” I asked.

“Not at all.”

“Do you have any ideas whose voice it was that I heard? I’ve been wracking my brain but I can’t figure it out.” I said.

“Not a clue.”

“Ok then. One more thing. Of all the worlds you visited, which one would be best for learning to control the power I’ve got. I need somewhere I can train without causing a lot of collateral damage. Plus, I kinda need to figure out how to walk, run, all that stuff.”

“I could answer that,” Clare said, “Olympus Coliseum.”

“Olympus Coliseum?” I asked. “Sounds good. What’s it like there?”

“It’s best if you see it yourself.” She said.

“Splendid. Now, shall we get going before worlds start disappearing?” Discord asked.

“Sure. But who’s going and who’s staying?”

“I’m going,” said Erahaor, “I can’t stand this world anyway.”

“I volunteer,” Said Clare “And I know where we can get more ‘helpers,’ if we take a bit of extra time.”

“I’m going.” said Die.

“If you go, Ven is probably going too, so that makes a total of 6, since the princesses have to stay here.”

“Actually, we shall be accompanying you as well. Discord, we were wondering if you’d be able to create doppelgangers to stand in for us while we’re gone?” Celestia replied with a small smile.

“That wasn’t my reason.” Clare said flatly, “The first world we’re going to is an alternate version of this world, if you see yourself...” she trailed off.

“That’s why we’ll be disguising ourselves. I am not abandoning my friends.” Luna deadpanned.

“You’d better stay on the ship on that world anyway,” Clare said, “So Its 8 crewmembers so far. Noctis, Die, Celestia, Luna, Ven, me, and Era. So on ‘our’ world we could probably get others to help us.”

“Ok,” Discord said, “Die, since you are the... closest to Ven, you should go get him so that he will come with us.”

“Fine.” She said, before switching to her pegasus form and taking off in the direction Ven had gone.

“So, do we get the grand tour?” Clare asked Discord, who gave a grin.

“Yes, come right this way,” he said, and snapped his fingers.
__________________________________________________________________

“Woah, I am definitely liking the game room.” I said, glad I’d managed to learn how to walk without stumbling every two seconds. “So, how long did it take you to make the ship?”

“About a second.” Discord said.

“Just wish Clare would stop playing the final fantasy games,” Ven said. He and Die had joined us a few minutes after we started, along with Celestia and Luna, who were content to just enjoy the tour in silence.

“I dunno, I thought it was cool seeing Zack’s story, except for, y’know, the ‘incident’ onward.” I said.

“It’s not that, its that I wanted to play some Kingdom Hearts.” He said glumly.

“Well, we can come back to it later. I’d like to see just what a keyblade is really capable of.”

“Easiest way would be to play the game, too bad you have hooves.”

“You forgot about telekinesis.” I said.

“Actually, I solved the whole ‘hooves’ problem by making a VR room.”

Vens eyes widened, “Holy crap, really?”

“Eeyup!” Discord said in a southern accent.

He turned to Die and me, “Don’t. Tell. Clare. She would hog it.”

“My lips are sealed. So, how does it work? Is there a helmet you put on or something, or is it something even cooler?”

“No, its just Illusions, and minor shocks will go through injuries when you’re hit, you could use that for your training as well.” He explained

“So, it is cooler than tech. Color me impressed Discord.” I said.

“So... How long will the actual cross dimensional travel take?” Ven asked.

“Depends on the dimension, if we’re going to an alternate version of the same world, half an hour, to a completely different world, at least a day.”

“So, Ven, what’s your world like?” I asked.

Ven just chuckled “You’ll see soon enough, we ready to go?”

Die shrugged. “Sure, I guess. Hey, Discord, we’re ready when you are.”

“WE GO!” Discord shouted as he slammed a paw onto a big red button that materialised out of nowhere. I tensed up, expecting a sudden movement but when nothing happened, I relaxed.

“That, was surprisingly uneventful.” I said.

“What did you expect?” Ven said.

“I dunno. A sudden drop, or movement, or something.” I replied.

“Exactly.”

“Soooo....wanna get some training in?” I asked.

“Eh, why not? If we come across any heartless it would help for you to be skilled with a keyblade...”

“Plus, I need to learn control over my powers all over again. Without Tsuki no me, I’m a disaster waiting to happen.” I said sadly.

“Well, if you don’t mind me asking, what did the Lunar orb actually look like?”

“It looked like a support materia, except for the crescent moon symbol inside it. It acted like a magic materia with multiple spells available, but it was hard to control without using the blade as a medium.” I explained.

“... and could I look at your keyblade?” He asked with a spark in his eye.

I shrugged. “Sure.” I summoned it and levitated it over to him, but the second he touched it, it disappeared and reappeared next to me. “What the?”

He facepalmed “Yeah, I forgot they did that... Anyway, the coloration is the similar to the orb, and it does have the whole ‘moon’ thing with it... Could the keyblade... be the orb itself?”

“Wait, what? So the orb may have become this? Then does that mean Die’s Orb could do the same?” I asked.

“Possible, though not likely. If her orb does have an alternate form, it would probably be a different kind of item. So about that training?[/green]”

I nodded, and we followed Discord to the ‘VR Room’.

__________________________________________________________________

Ven stood in the middle of the chamber, reading the instructions Discord gave us on how to activate it.

“Virtual Reality, On.” The room instantly lit up. “Run battle simulation: Basic Heartless attack.”

The room grew dark, and the environment changed to a forest in the night, and tons of black creatures came out of the ground. Ven grinned, and said, “Create item: keyblade. Create ‘keychain’: Way to the Dawn.” and a Giant silver key appeared in his hand, and strange symbol, which he attached to the key. A large amount of light came from the keyblade. When the light faded, it had changed.

“Ok, now what? These ones seem a little, tame, to me.”

“One moment, and I’ll start it.” He looked up, “Create enemy: Vanitas.” A ball of darkness appeared, and out of it walked a guy in a strange outfit and a keyblade of his own.

“Wait, Vanitas? Umbra mentioned this guy. He can create these things called Unversed, right?”

“Yeah, thats him, you ready?” He asked, dropping into his ready stance. I nodded.

“Simulation: Start.” he said, and ran forward, shouting “Ability disable: attack magic.”

“Making it harder for us? Fine with me.” I said, levitating Blackout Prizm in front of me and charging towards Vanitas, who summoned several unversed, who divided themselves between attacking me and attacking Ven. The ones who attacked Ven lasted about a second.

“My powers technically aren’t magic,” He said with a grin as he dispatched two more heartless and unversed. He leaped into the air, and dispatched another heartless, “That makes 20 heartless, 23 unversed. Change difficulty: pureblood heartless, level 2”

More of the ‘shadows’ popped out of the ground, as well as taller ones that otherwise looked the same. (These, and these.)

“Hey Ven, can I create an enemy for us to fight? There’s a specific one I want to go up against.” I asked.

“Sure, why not? Pause simulation. Remove enemy: Vanitas.” And with that, the masked figure faded away.

“Ok, my turn. Create enemy: Iron Imprisoner Stage Four!” I said, and the creature I had fought before appeared right in front of me, flaming cage hammer and all.

Ven grinned, “Hm... All right, if we’re going with higher rank enemies. Create enemy: Guard Armor. Create enemy: Number 13: Roxas.” and with that, two more creatures appeared, one was a large suit of purple armor, and the other was a black cloak, and held two keyblades, one Light, the other dark.

“Woah, two keyblades? Where’d he get those? And that armor, sorta looks like the Trinity Armor I fought, if a more simplistic version, that is.”

“Trinity Armor was an unversed, the Guard armor was the original idea’s form, a heartless. As for the two keyblades, its a rare occurrence, anyway, meet Roxas, member number 13 of the organization, he is the Nobody of a boy named Sora.”

“Wait, Sora? Umbra made a fake DtH that he said looked like Sora’s. Does he have brown spiky hair and wield a silver keyblade with a black handle and golden handguards?” I asked.

“Yeah, he is the main character in the Kingdom Hearts games.”

“Huh, this Roxas guy doesn’t look much like him, and from what Umbra said, Nobodies are supposed to look like the person they used to be.”

“Thats because he is based off of someone else’s heart that was fused with Sora, coincidentally also named Ventus, and depending on where we are in the KH story line, you may meet him while he’s awake.”

“Dude, you share a name with a video game character? That’s pretty cool.” I said.

He grinned, “Why do you think I chose it? Unsummon pureblood Heartless and basic unversed. Change location: New York. Unpause Simulation.” He said and all the black creatures and all the unversed but the Imprisoner remained.

I looked around, seeing us in a large open area with tall buildings on all sides.

“Welcome to my old home, New York city.” He said as he blocked an attack from Roxas, “I’ll take this one.”

“Ok then, I guess I get the imprisoner and the armor.” I replied, spreading my wings and flying above the Imrpisoner’s swinging hammer.

Ven then said “Allow ability: Drive forms: anti form and final form.” and darkness flowed around him, making him look like a heartless as his keyblade disappeared.

The now heartless-esque Ventus ran forward on all fours, and attacked Roxas with rapid attacks, moving so fast I couldn’t even see, it wasn’t until I took a hit from the guard armor that I remembered my own fight. I released a breath I hadn’t even realised I had been holding, and I used a technique I’d learned around 3 years after obtaining the Orb.

I held BP to my opposite side and took a deep breath as I faced the Guard Armor. Cherry Blossom leaves started to appear and blow around us Suddenly, I disappeared in a blur of speed as I charged towards and past the Armor, making a single strike before reappearing behind it. “ZANTETSUKEN!” I said, as the strike caught up with the armor, completely bisecting it. It disappeared in a flash of darkness, leaving only the Iron Imprisoner for me to face.

“Not bad.” Ven said, sitting on top of Roxas, who then faded out of existence.

“Thanks. A lot tougher to use as a pony though.” I huffed, exhausted after what usually only used up a fraction of my stamina. “Think it’d be a bad idea to use it again?” I asked as I faced the Imprisoner that was charging towards us.

“Ability activate:synch blade. Summon keychains: Oathkeeper and Oblivion” Ven said whilst dodging a flaming spin attack, and another keyblade appeared in his left hand, as well as two other symbols, he then attached the symbols to his keyblades, and they changed again into the same ones Roxas used.

“Cool. Hey, if Die’s orb ever did become a keyblade, what do you think it would be called?” I asked, trying to imagine my sister with a keyblade.

He shot a beam of light out of both keyblades, instantly destroying it, “Hm.. now thats a good question... Probably something like this... remove ability: synch blade, remove keychains, way to the dawn, oathkeeper, oblivion. create keychain: ignited heart” this time the ‘keychain,’ as he kept calling them appeared on the keyblade, instantly transforming it, and making it catch fire.

“Ok, now that’s awesome.” I said, when suddenly, a random name popped into my head. “Create keychain: Infinity Spectrum.”

A keychain with a sun appeared in front of me, and as I stuck it onto my keyblade, it completely transformed. “Cool, so mine can transform.”

Ven grinned, “All keyblades can change shape based off of the keyblades.”

“So, do you think I can keep the keychain?” I asked with a small grin.

“Probably not, since it’s just virtual reality.” He shrugged, “How long have we been here?”

“Lemme check. Display Time/Date, 12 hour system.” I said. Nothing came up.

“Wrong command if you want to know that. Display ‘play’ time.” a timer appeared, saying 24:13 and went up every second.

“Oh. Then how do I check the time itself then?” I asked, a little embarrassed by my blunder.

“Display calendar.” and a calendar appeared, saying it was the fifteenth of June. “Huh, Lumos was right, the world is on a different clock.”

“Ok. So, who are we going to ask for help when we get there anyway?” I inquired.

“Oh, just the rest of our little human ‘colony.’” Ven said, “I know a few who definitely will join, and one who probably won’t.”

“I see. So, can you tell me about them?”

“Well, I don’t really know much about them personally, but I know what they call themselves, and their powers more so than them. To start, there are the first two, Shade and Aqua, they were sort of in a relationship at last check.”

“Like you and Die? And don’t deny it. You like her, right?” I asked with a grin.

He turned a deep shade of crimson, “Please stop bringing it up...”

“I will when you and Die both admit you like each other.” I said with a small scowl.

“Well you already know I like her, now will you stop pushing it?”

“Did you tell her?” I asked.

“... No, I haven’t... It’s just...” He looked like he was searching for the right words, “I don’t know how... and honestly, I don’t know how she’ll respond immediately to it, which is the part that scares me the most.”

“Look, I know she likes you. We even had a bet before the fight that Era interrupted. If I won, she had to ask you out, and when I said that, she blushed redder than the Solar Orb. The problem is, you’ll never know how she’ll respond until you try, but I have the utmost faith that it will be a good one.” I said.

“Fine, I’ll tell her, just... Not until we reach a specific world.”

“Which one. And before you say ‘wait and see’, know that I’ll keep hounding you until you tell me.”

“I won’t tell you the name because you’ll hound me to go to that world if I do, but I will tell you its the most likely world for us to be separated from the rest on, if I’m right. Anyway, we should be arriving any moment, so lets find the others.”

“I won’t hound you to go. We’ll get there when we get there, and all that. All I want to know is its name. Is that so much to ask?”

“Well, how about this: think of it as... a surprise for you as well as her. Besides, if you knew, you might act a little off when we get there, which could tip her off.”

“I’ll give you that. Ever since that DtH incident, I’ve felt different. If I had to describe myself, I’d say I was more like, well, a pony, in regards to my emotional state. I feel more open than I ever did, and I find it a little easier to be happy about things.”

“Yeah, makes sense. Anyway, lets go to the bridge.”

“Ok.” I said, and we headed through the ship. “Hey Ven, you know I like Luna, right?”

“We all do, dude.”

“Yeah yeah.” I said in mock-irritation. “What I mean is, does she feel the same way?”

“Is it not obvious?”

“Well, she did hug me when I got back....but I thought it was just because she was worried. So she actually li--”

“You two can talk about it later,” Discord said, appearing in front of us, “We’re here. Now, I’m only teleporting Clare and Ventus down. Everyone else has to stay on the ship, including myself, the environment apparently has formed some sort of thing that could harm off worlders since I was last there.”

“Ok Cap’n Discord. I wish I could’ve seen what your Equis is like though Ven.”

“Yeah, and I wish I was the one who owned this ship. Ok, Discord, anything I should know before you send me off?” Discord snapped his fingers, and a device appeared around his wrist.

“That will let you contact me when everyone you can bring is with you, and we only have 4 spare rooms, so choose carefully.” He said.

Ven did an overdone salute, before saying “Ready to go, sir.” Discord just snapped his fingers, and he disappeared.

“Well that’s cool. And only four? Couldn’t you make more if you needed to? I mean, you can do practically anything, right?” I said.

“True, but I don’t like dealing with too large of groups. Too much noise.”

“Good point. Too many and it get’s way too hard to get things done too.”

“Glad to know we see eye to eye on that, my pony friend.”

“Thanks. Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, but there is no guarantee I’ll answer it.”

“Ok, better make it a good question then. Hmmm....do you like Celestia? I mean romantically.”

Without blush or any sign of bashfulness, Discord, just said “Yes, very much so.”

“Ok then. I was gonna ask you about why I feel different, seeing as you tend to know things that not even Celestia could figure out, but I already think I know why, besides not having to worry about Akumu taking over my body anymore.”

“Oh trust me, the trouble Akumu will be is far worse now than before. At Umbra’s side, he can travel to any world much faster than us, and spread heartless easily.” Discord said glumly.

“Then we just have to take him down, don’t we?” I replied with a confident smile.

“I wish it was that easy, there are only... I think 10 living keyblade wielders right now. One is currently in a coma, one is a statue, one is trapped in the world of darkness, three are children with next to no training with it, one just discovered his, one is too old to really fight well enough, one is a humanized mouse, and one is the guy who created the very first heartless, and by connection the nobodies.”

“Ok then. So, do you have anything besides the games I could use to learn more about this Kingdom Hearts stuff, including previous keyblade wielders?” I asked.

“I have a written collection of a group of items in the game called the ‘secret reports,’ and the guides to each game. As well as some of the research that, once stolen, helped create the first heartless.”

“Awesome. So where is it? I wanna learn as much as I can before we get to where we’re going.” I said.

“VR room: library mode.” Discord said, as though bored.

“Not a fan of libraries?” I asked as the room became a huge library with books of all kinds.

“No, I just don’t want people stealing my books.”

“Dude, couldn’t you enchant them to trap any would-be thieves inside until you decide they learned their lesson?”

“Yes, but this is easier. Plus they might like that kind of punishment.”

“Not if they become a blank page or something. Then they’re not in the story, they’re just blank.”

“Still, it’s easier to just make them illusions.”

“I guess. So, is there anything you wanna do?” I asked as I looked through the various sections for information on the Kingdom Hearts games.

“Got nothing to do, really, since simply leaving the ship may kill me. Also, Find related articles: Kingdom hearts.” The library shrunk to just a handful of books.

“Cool. I should really start reading the instructions, huh?” I said.

“It would be better if you just played the Kingdom Hearts games in VR mode.”

“Maybe, but I like to read up on things as well before I experience them. Except instruction manuals. I always dive in without reading them and cause havoc as I try to figure out the controls by myself.” I chuckled remembering when I went with Die and my parents to the Gold Saucer, and getting addicted to all the games.

“Well... In this version there are no real controls, since its true virtual reality, scents, sounds, sight, even emulation of touch.” I could hear the pride from his voice.

“Dude, that is definitely awesome. Wish I could make something like that.” I said, more than a little jealous.

“It’s magic. I don’t have to explain shit!”

I chuckled. “I never said you had to explain it. I was just wishing I could make something as awesome as what you made, dude.”

“Well you can’t cause you don’t have as large magic supplies.”

I sighed. “Technically it’s because I can’t use chaos magic. The Orbs that gave Celestia and Luna their power reside within me and Die. Well, technically, my Orb may have become a keyblade. And I have to learn to control that power all over again. Hey, any ideas just how powerful the Orbs really are? I’m asking a lot of questions, aren’t I?” I said, giving myself a headache.

“Yes you are. Enjoy the reading, and I do recommend playing some KH for a better understanding, as not much is written about the keyblade.” Discord said before disappearing.

“I will. Thanks.” I started to go through the books one by one, in historical order, rather than in order of which game came first. “Man, Discord has definitely got an awesome collection.” I said as I went through the various books, guides and journals at hand... I mean hoof.
__________________________________________________________________

I’d fallen asleep about 3/4 of the way through all the books. I was completely wrecked. I was awoken by a voice I recognized as Ven’s came over the intercom, saying “Beam me up, Scotty.”

I got up, turned off the VR, and headed straight to the bridge, where I saw several humans that I assumed were the friends Ven had talked about, and each was an oddity on their own.

The first one was completely covered from head to toe, in a grey, loose fitting robe and face wrap, with a black stripe going up the front and back. Second, there was a guy who wore a simple business suit from the same material as Ven’s outfit, had neon blue hair, and was soaked in water. After that there was a woman secreting smoke from her hands somehow, who wore a t-shirt and shorts ALSO made of the same material. Last, there was a guy with Spiky Red and Yellow hair, who was wearing blue jeans, a red shirt, and a light blue one of those jackets than have fur coming out of the hood.

I walked up to the four new arrivals and introduced myself. “Hi. Noctis, ex-SOLDIER, pony, and immortal, at your service.”

They all stared for a few moments, before the guy in the business suit stepped forward said, “I am Aqua, that” he pointed at the woman secreting smoke, “Is shade, that,” he pointed at the robed one, “Is Tox, and finally, we have ‘Sparky.’” The man in the jacket glared at him.

“Its ‘Jolt,’ not ‘Sparky.’” He said.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you all. So, did Ven tell you about Lumos?” I asked.

“About how he is now four beings, two heartlesses, and two nobodies?” Shade asked.

“And about how one heartless, Umbra, nearly got to me, and released my own darkness, Akumu, who now exists in my human form, while I am now a pegasus and wield a keyblade ? Did he tell you about that?” I asked.

“Well,” Said the one called ‘Tox,’ in a feminine voice, “We seem to be on the same page here.”

“Alright then. So, you know we’re going after Lumos and Malum, and Mirum if it’s possible to save him that is. We have to find them before Umbra and Akumu.”

“Yes, that we do,” Jolt said, “Anyway, Ven also explained who we would be traveling with beforehand, which is probably why Stan refused to come with us.”

“Stan?” I asked.

“One of the others who arrived after Discords defeat, he has earth based powers, and is a stereotype jock, and a sexist pig.” Clare said angrily.

“Ok then. Good thing he didn’t come with you. Anyway, where are we off to first Cap’n?” I turned to Discord, who was in his human form.

“Ask navigation.” He said, pointing at Ven.

“Well?” I asked.

“We’re going to the world every KH game has visited at least once: Hollow Bastion, also known as Radiant Gardens.”

“Nice. So, what exactly are we hoping to find there? Think we’ll meet Yuffie and Cid?”

“How do you know of Hollow Bastion Restoration Committee?” Ven asked.

“I spent the past three hours reading up on Kingdom Hearts, that’s how.” I said smugly. “By the way, I really wanna obtain some of those keychains sometime. They look like they’d be handy.”

“Well, they might have one or two in the shops there, thats one reason we’re stopping there. Also, we’re going to look for information on recent heartless attacks, maybe try to find other keyblade wielders, oh, and maybe meet with some people from your world. Though they probably won’t recognize you.”

“Ok then. If I recall, the ones there should be Tifa, Cloud and Yuffie, right? And Cid, can’t forget that crazy flyboy.” I said.

“Well, Cloud may or may not be there, depending on if the battle with Sephiroth has happened yet.”

I bristled. “Don’t. Mention. Sephiroth.” I said, trying to calm down by taking deep breaths.

“Got it, anyway, if that battle has occurred, then KH2 has already happened, if not, we may run into Sora if we wait near the Dark Depths.” Ven said. “Also, the information we do gather will decide the next location. So I’m only deciding which world to go to out of those available.”

“Ok then. Hey, where are Die and the princesses by the way?” I asked, only just noticing their absence.

Clare answered, “They are all in the game room, Die playing the final fantasy games, and the princesses are playing Halo, oddly enough we have an internet connection here.”

“Ok then. So, got an ETA?”

“One day two hours.” Discord said, and said, “Liftoff in five, four, three, two,” The people who just got on all grabbed onto something and tensed up, “one, and we have liftoff.”

Ven chuckled at the antics of the other humans, and walked over to me, before whispering “Don’t tell these guys about the VR room either, Aqua would ruin it with his water secretion, shade would fill the place with smoke, Sparky would electrocute the damn thing in anger, and Tox would sit in there for hours playing card games with illusionary opponents.”

“Is Tox a gambler in disguise?” I asked.

“No, she plays Magic the Gathering, I’m pretty sure you’ve heard of it from Lumos.”

“Yeah. Era, the elf who tried to kill me, was from one of the places that the game is set in.”

“Yeah, I know, Mirrodin.” He said, “I’m gonna go play some KH in the Virtual room”

“And speaking of Era, where’s he? And why do I keep failing to notice others being absent?”

“Era has been in the ‘dark room’ since we left, as for the second question, you’re not very observant. See ya in a bit.” Ven said as he left the room.

“Oh. Right.” I said, facehoofing. “And yeah, I’m not very observant anymore. It used to be hard for me to miss something. Now I feel like I have to reach that state of alertness all over again.” I said.

“Um, Noctis?” Clare said, “He left.”

“Oh. See what I mean though? I’m starting out as a complete amateur again.”

“Yeah. I see. Maybe having Akumu was constantly keep you on your toes, which now would have to be metaphorical, made you more observant, and being without him, you’re relaxing to the point you stop noticing normal things? Damn, gave myself a headache.” Clare said, gripping her head lightly.

“So because he’s separated from me, I subconsciously lowered my guard and as such, I’m much less observant etc. Well, at least I seem to regain that alertness in battle.” I said.

“Eh, good enough, anyway, goodnight.” She said, and turned to leave.

“Sure.” I said, before turning to Discord. “I’m gonna go train for a while. If I start spending too long, you have my permission to have whoever you want do whatever you want them to if it gets me to take a break.” I said.

“Seems legit,” Discord said.

“Aqua, Shade, Tox, ‘Sparky’.” I said nodding to each of them, smiling despite the glare Jolt gave me, before heading to the VR Room for another training session. Unbeknownst to me, someone was already there.

As I walked in, I found myself in Hollow Bastion, the KH2 version. There, I saw ‘Sora’ battling against an army of heartless.

‘Sora’ charged forward toward the hoard, Kingdom key in hand, slashing through the first three that came his way. This was followed by charging through several, and letting out a wide slash, taking out a good portion of them. His body glowed, and he lept up, diving through the crowd of heartless and floating up several times, before landing again, and continuing his onslaught.

About two minutes into the battle, one of the floating heartless began to create a blue energy. ‘Sora’ saw this, and jumped up and grabbed it. He then landed, and used the heartless to destroy the heartless in a wide radius. His keyblade then glowed red, and with a shout of “FIRE!” several fireballs began to orbit him for a few seconds, striking any heartless stupid enough to draw near.

‘Sora’ kept this strategy up until the rest of the heartless were all dead. At which a mechanical voice said “Battle of Hollow Bastion: Complete. Damage taken: light. Time taken: 4 minutes, 40 seconds. Kills: 1000. Reaction commands used: 2. Spells used: 1. Items used: 0. Overall Score: A”

“Damn, I was aiming for ‘S’ rank... Shouldn’t have used Fire.” Ven’s voice said.

“That was still damn impressive, and coming from a former 1st Class, you know that’s something.” I said as the Virtual battleground faded away.

“Hey,” Ven said, “... How much of that did you see?”

“Pretty much all of it. Never seen fire used like that before. Is that what a keyblade is really capable of?” I asked.

“Hardly, Sora’s abilities are nowhere near those of any who have obtained a ‘Mark of Mastery,’ from what I understand.”

“I remember. Master Aqua was able to completely alter the Land of Departure into what is now Castle Oblivion, where Ventus sleeps and Aqua’s armor resides.”

“Also known as ‘the castle that never was.’ Another ability related to the mark of mastery is the ‘Keyblade inheritance’ ceremony.”

“Actually, that’s not true. The inheritance ceremony can be performed by any keyblade wielder. Take Terra passing his on to Riku as an example.” I explained.

“A fair point, and Riku performed it accidentally with Sora in KH1/”

“And Aqua with Kairi in Birth By Sleep.” I reminded him.

“I think you may have read more than needed.” Ven said with a chuckle.

“Maybe I did, but right now I’m here to train. I need to get back to the level I was at before Akumu was separated from me.

Ven grinned, “Well then, how about this? Change Scenario: Kingdom Hearts 2 final mix, hidden fight: Lingering Will battle, replace characters with Players, unlimited MP, all keyblades allowed.”

“So, Lingering Will, huh? This should be fun.” I said with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

“Create weapon: Way to the dawn. Create weapon: Halted Dusk.” Ven said, the keyblade of Riku appearing in his hand, and a reversed version in his left.

“I’ll stick with my own keyblade for now.”

“Sure you don’t want a keychain?” Ven asked.

“I’ll stick with my own until we obtain some keychains. Then I’ll start learning to use those.” I said.

“Fair enough.”

“So, when do we start?” I asked.

“Simulation: Start” Ven said, and the suit of armor began to attack relentlessly.
_________________________________________________________________

<Ok, so how’s this one?> Umbra asked, holding out his sixth attempt at making me an MP5.

“You forgot the firing pin, again.” I said, rolling my eyes.

<DAMN IT!> he mind-shouted, throwing it at the nearest tree, followed by charging chaos into it, making it explode.

“Umbra, calm the fuck down.” I said, drawing the sword he made me. “If it’s that difficult, just stop for now. It’s not like I’m gonna need it right now. Is Noctis here? Is Die here? Are Lumos or any of his other parts besides you here?”

Umbra took a few deep breaths, before ‘saying,’ <No, they aren’t...>

“Then I don’t need it right now. I want it, but I can wait until you can focus. Maybe trying to create all these weapons in a row was a bad idea?” I said calmly, though inside I was raging. Thank the darkness Heartless can conceal it as well as we can when we want to.

<Maybe,>

“And besides, Lumos is probably nothing more than a dusk right now. He’ll be easy to kill, and once he’s gone, we can take all the time in the world to finish off Malum and Mirum.”

<No, Lumos kept his original shape, I can tell you that much, and since Mirum is a heartless, he and Malum could form a whole new person, if they tried.>

“Well even if he did, and even if they do, we’re the most powerful Heartless that ever existed, except for maybe Ansem, but since he’s not around anymore, we’re top darkness dogs.”

<You know, you just gave me an idea...> Umbra said with a sadistic grin.

“Oh, do tell.” I said with a manic smile.

<Did I tell you about the artificial keyblade when I was talking about KH?>

“You didn’t need to. I guessed that was the one you used on Noctis to separate us, good job by the way, you couldn’t even kill him.”

<Well, that was just a physical copy, what I did used a huge amount of my own energy, the actual key to the heart was never completed. It was built out of six hearts>

“What, we need seven or something?” I asked sarcastically.

<Wrong, we’re going to forge our own blade. A blade of sin, and I know just where to start...> Umbra ‘said,’ his grin widening.

“Oh, don’t keep me in suspense, where are we going? Also, why do you use that mind thing, why don’t you just create a mouth for yourself or something?”

<I can’t edit my physical appearance so easily.>

“Fine, then allow me.” I said, drawing my sword and advancing towards him with the intent of cutting him a mouth.

<I already have a mouth, it just isn’t designed to talk. Besides, with this I can tell you what I’m planning without others knowing my plans.>

“Yeah, well what about when you’re thinking about those magazines. I couldn’t get to sleep for hours cause you kept getting those damn images popping into your head and broadcasting them in your sleep!”

<Who said that was accidental?>

“Oh, you sonova...No, not gonna let you win. I’m gonna calm down, and think about ripping Noctis’ throat open.”

Umbra let out a low, barking laugh, one of the few sounds his mouth can make, <Anyway, we’re headed to a different world, more specifically, a different Equestria, the ‘Elements of harmony’ each contain a sin of their own as well. So does the dragon the element of magic has for an assistant. Seven hearts, seven sins.>

“So, a new dark keyblade. And since we’re using the elements, how about we give it the name ‘False Harmony’.” I suggested.

<Not a bad idea, anyway, the reason we’re going to a different Equis is because if we used this one, Noctis, Die, and the rest would notice, and we would be rushed, and may slip up. On a different world, we have all the time we need.>

“Wait, what if the princesses of that world come after us for going after all of them? We’re strong, but I don’t feel like going up against the two who control the sun and moon just yet.”

<The controlling of the sun and moon weakens them quite a bit for a time, so if we attack at dawn or dusk, we’ll have more time.> Umbra ‘said’ as he began to form something with his metal.

“Not necessarily. Remember, the rules are always slightly different at the very least in each Equestria. They may be weakened by it here, but what if it has the opposite effect there?”

<... A fair point, but then again, what if we go to a world where both are already dead?>

“I would say you’re crazy, then I would say I’m in.” I replied, smiling like a fool.

<The biggest problem is the way we arrive there. If we arrive in a menacing or ominous way, we’ll be attacked quickly, and the elements can turn shit to stone.>

“Ha. Then we’ll arrive incognito, as they say. Let ‘em think we’re there to help or some shit like that, then when their backs are turned, slice, out with their hearts.”

<Not a slice, but more a pull.> Umbra corrected <Anyway, the first sin to locate would be ‘Envy’ or ‘Pride’. Both would be helpful in the harvesting process.>

“Well, Noctis only met those ponies briefly, but I’d say that Applejack bitch represents pride. I could feel it radiating from her. If she’s got as much pride in the world you speak of as she does here, then we’ve got our ‘Pride’.”

<Indeed, her pride is more than the average amount, and after that, Rarity holds ‘Envy,’ which would be the second stop. Rainbow Dash holds ‘Sloth,’ which we should get quickly after the second, otherwise she could be a problem later.>

“Oh, and how would a lazy bitch be a problem?” I asked, a little confused.

<How about her having enough power to replicate a Nuke?>

“Ha. You said she’s sloth, she’d probably be too lazy to use it.”

<Sloth is being lazy, yes, but I have seen it before, if it were used on us... we would be splattered over several streets.>

“Ugh, fine. So, calmed down yet?”

<Yeah, Also, here.> He tossed me a small hand crossbow, <It’s a decent enough weapon.>

“Yeah, and I can mod it later. Ah, the joys of knowing almost everything there is to know about weapons.”

<So, shall we begin the hunt?>

“We shall...”

<Indeed,> Umbra said, picking up a sword with darkness infused, and created a dark passageway with a single swing of it.

“Ok, you have to teach me that.”

He grinned, <That’s a maybe, come on, grab what you can and lets go.>

I shrugged and took the crossbow as well as the blade, and followed him through the passageway, with one thought on my mind.

I’m gonna enjoy thi-FUCK IT’S COLD IN HERE!

After nearly a minute in that frozen hell, we walked out of the passageway in the branches of a large tree. Thankfully, Umbra hand made a platform out of darkness right before I could fall.

“So, where to, since I have no fucking idea where I am right now.” I whisper-yelled.

<Quiet, anyway, we’re right now in the branches of the tree making up the Ponyville Library.>

“Ponyville? What kind of retarded name is that!? And who builds a library in a tree? What are they, elves or something!?”

<The kind people give to a town in a show whose target audience was small children.>

“Oh. Ok then. It’s still a retarded name, though.”

<It’s a pun of the name of a real city on Earth.>

“Oh? What’s the city called, and can we blow it up or something when we’re done here?”

<If we were going to blow up every city there is a pony pun of on this world, it would take years. Trust me. Anyway, we need to get to Sweet Apple Acres to get our first ‘sin.’ Sweet apple acres is a farm just outside town, and before you bitch about me not having the passage go there, I could only choose the general area of an interdimensional warp.>

“I wasn’t gonna bi...well, maybe a little.” I admitted.

<Now, I think it’s night right now, or the branches are closer together than I thought they would be. If it’s the first, I can get us to the farm in a matter of seconds. If it’s the second, then we’ll have to wait for night if we want to stay stealthy.>

“Seriously? I’ll just pop my head out and check.” I said, poking my head up only to be yanked back down by Umbra.

<Thats not a good idea, if it is day, then you would be seen. I can think of a better way to check.>

“Then do it before I go stir-crazy!”

<Yeah, yeah.> Umbra said, as he slowly poked a sword through the branches, resulting in a single bit light coming through, <It’s artificial light, we’re lucky it’s night here>

“Alright then. Let’s get to...wait, where are we going again?”

<Farm called sweet apple acres.>

“Oh. Sounds more like the name of a brothel to me.”

<Oh I wish,>

“Eh, when we’re done here, let's find a world where it really is one.” I said, jumping out of the tree and hitting the ground running. Umbra’s platform of darkness pulled out over me, and Umbra just shook his head.

<What a waste of energy...>

“I heard that!” I said, appearing behind him as I switched from my smoky form to my solid one.

<I know,> He ‘said,’ as small amounts of darkness wrapped around our feet, and the platform sped up at an astonishing rate.

“So, where do you think little Knocky and his friends are?”

<Either A: looking for us. B: looking for Lumos, Mirum, and Malum, or C: Noctis is trapped in his heart, and the others are trying to get him out.> He paused for a moment, before the darkness began to slow. <We’re here.>

“I doubt that C is true”

<Hey, we can hope, can’t we?> He asked as the platform dissipated beneath us, and we dropped onto the ground. I gracefully landed on my ass.

“Ow. Dammit, I am so outta practice. Stupid Die with her stupid seal, I should’ve been in charge of this body for six years, but instead, I get locked in the weakling’s mind, then you get me out, and I’m too new to using the body to be effective outside of combat.” I complained.

<Well, now you get all the time in the world.> he said, <Anyway, it’s about time we collected ‘Pride.’> And with that, he put on a black glove with a white line down the middle of it.

“Nice glove. Is a blade gonna pop out? Can it make stuff burst into flames if you touch them with it?”

<No, the specialty of this glove is called ‘Soul Trap.’ You can guess why.>

“It traps the soul of whoever you hit with it within the glove, correct?”

<We have a winner. Also, Unlike stealing the heart, the pony will keep going without a soul for about a week. So the moment we take our first soul, the countdown starts.>

“So, we’ve got a week to do it? Easy munny!”

<Indeed, we only need one, maybe two nights maximum. My point in telling you is that if the princesses find a way to follow us, we’ll have a week’s head start.>

“We won’t need the extra time. Even if they find us, they won’t be able to do a damn thing.”

<Indeed, in fact, I’m beginning to wonder how strong their souls would be... >

“Well, I’m wondering why we ran from Noctis. I mean, I know he had a keyblade, but he’s a weakling, and he can’t even use that body, he has no practice with it.”

<We were in the world of his HEART though, he can edit anything within their.>

“Yeah, but he didn’t know that.”

<Knowing him, he would have eventually figured it out.>

“Even so, he’s still a weakling. But enough about him. Let’s get to soul stealin’!”

<Indeed, I remember Lumos reading something about Applejack having a... ‘connection’ with the trees. So we don’t even need to go inside really.> Umbra ‘said,’ while walking over to a tree.

“Oh, well I’m starving. So I’m gonna grab an apple now.” I said, reaching towards the branches and plucking a juicy apple from it.

<You know, I was just thinking the same thing.> Umbra’s voice said, as he grabbed one of the brightest, shiniest apples off of a tree.

I heard an angry roar come from behind me, and I turned to see a bright orange pony with a yellow mane running right at me, only for Umbra to appear next to her, and stick his gloved hand into her stomach. Her eyes faded a bit, and she collapsed.

<’Pride’ captured. Creating sinblade of pride.> Umbra thought-spoke, as a ball of metal appeared in his other hand. The metal shaped itself into a misshapen black keyblade with a golden handguard. <Next stop: Envy>

“Cool. Hey, since she doesn’t have a soul anymore, does that mean she’s technically a zombie? Can we order her around and stuff?”

<Almost, but no, it would be better if we didn’t, otherwise we would have a bright orange pony following us around for a week.>

“Only if we ordered her to follow us. We could just order her t-”

<No, thats not what it is, the first to give an order to a soulless is automatically bound to them, until one dies. Think of it as an honor sense.>

“Oh. Ok then.”

<Now then... Next is... whatever the name of the clothing store the wielder of ‘Envy’ works and lives at. Lets go.> Umbra said as he lifted us into the air on a new dark platform, which began to fly over the town. We were outside of an odd building very soon.

“Why is it shaped like a darkness damned merry-go-round?”

<Children’s cartoon, remember?>

“Fuck the children if this is what they want!”

<Lets just get this over with,> Umbra said as he warped us inside with a dark passage

“And you say you can’t do precise.” I smirked..

<I said I can’t do interdimensional transport precisely. Never did I say Local is difficult.>

“Meh, whatever floats your boat. So, where’s this Envy girl anyway? I wanna do it this time. Gimme the glove!”

<Very well, just be sure to jab with it. Also, upstairs.> He said, tossing me the glove he used to capture the last sin.

“Oh yeah, bitch is gonna get punched!” I said as I started towards the stairs.

<Just be quiet about it.> Umbra told me as he followed me.

“I don’t need to be quiet, I’ve got a soul stealing glove!” I retorted.

<It can only hold one soul at a time. By the way.>

“Maybe so, but if anyone else comes in, I’ll just kick their asses.”

<Fair enough.> He replied, opening a door that led to a large bedroom, in which an ivory pony with an overly fancy purple hairdo was sleeping. I walked up to her, slapped her awake, and smiled as I shoved my gloved hand into her chest, revelling in the shocked face she made as I pulled her soul from her body. When her eyes were completely dull and lifeless, I took the glove off and tossed it back to Umbra.

“That was fun.”

<These ones have been too easy in my opinion.>

“Yeah. I get the feeling someone’s letting us do all this. Like they’re pulling strings or something to make sure we succeed. I don’t like it.”

<Yeah, Lumos got that feeling a lot ever since he absorbed Discord.> He put on the glove again, and ‘said’ <Envy captured, creating sinblade of envy.> As a larger, jeweled keyblade appeared instead of the design of the last one.

“So, Sloth next, since you’re so scared of being nuked?”

<Again.>

“Again? When did you get nuked a first time?”

<Happened to Lumos, but I know how it feels since I have all his memories of it.>

“What does it feel like?”

<It’s like being hit by a cannon ball traveling at the speed of sound.>

“Well alright then. We’ll just avoid ‘inspiring’ her.”

<There are two ways we could go about this one. First, we attack during one of her many day time naps, second, we attack at night, at night, I have no clue what it is she does, so it’s possible it would be safer to attack during the day, although if she is awake at night... Well, at least we get a challange.>

“Hmm, I’m gonna go with attack at night. But we’ve gotta find her first.”

<Well, we can check her house. All I know for sure is that if she isn’t there, she will be flying somewhere.>

“Alright then, lead the way. I wanna get this over with so we can get out of this shithole.”

<You and me both, I want to get making heartless too.> Umbra said as he warped us out and put us on another dark platform.

“I just want to kill those idiots.” I said as we arrived near a ‘house in the sky’. “DAFUQ! How can a house be made of clouds!?”

<Somehow pegasi have the ability to walk on clouds, some sort of passive magic.> Umbra said <Lumos made one on his world, though there aren’t rainbows coming out of it. Also it looks more like storm clouds. Aaaaand I just realised something.>

“Yeah?” I said.

<If someone manages to get Noctis out of his, DtH? Anyway, if someone manages to get him out, and they help him come after us, wouldn’t Ven and Clare try getting back-up from Lumos’ world?>

“I would hope so, otherwise it wouldn’t be much of a challenge. Also, who would they get to help?”

<Well, there is a fire/lightning user, a poison user, a water user, an earth user, and a smoke user.>

“Well, I already know who I like the most among them.” I said, grinning.

<Oh, do tell.> Umbra said with a grin that was as creepy, if not creepier than my own.

“Well, the poison user of course. Think we could use their own poison against them if they come along with the little ragtag group?”

<Well, using her and shade’s power, Lumos made a dagger that can kill in 5 seconds from the cut. But that is lost to us.>

“How come?”

<Lumos put it somewhere in the dark realm, a random spot. It would take years to find, so all we can do related to it is pray we don’t step on it.>

“Ok, I officially hate Lumos.” I said as we finally reached the house.

<Yeah. I know that feel.>

“Hey, will we be able to stand on these?” I asked as I put out a foot with the intention of testing it’s solidity. He grabbed me by the scruff of the neck as I began to fall through.

<Lumos had wings, remember?>

“Dammit. I hate clouds.” I huffed.

<I’ll check, Since I’m Lumos’ heartless I shou-> and then he fell through the cloud as he tried to step on it. a dark board rose up, barely large enough for him to stand on.

<Fuck that was a close one.>

“You don’t have wings. That sucks.”

<Thats because when I was Sanguine I tore them out. Dammit why did I do that?!>

“Oh. Wish I could’ve seen that. It would have been awesome.”

<Eh, it wasn’t that interesting, anyway, I’ll lower you to the ground, and then check the house.> He ‘said’ as the platform I stood on began it’s decent.

“Awww, I wanted to see you rip her soul out!” I complained as I stepped onto the hard ground.

<Yeah, yeah, I’ll be back shortly,> and with that, his dark board lifted him into the cloud house.

I sat on the ground with crossed legs, wondering what had happened to my weaker half’s sword, when suddenly, it just appeared in my hand.

“Well, this is interesting.”

<She isn’t here.> I heard Umbra’s voice say, as he landed in front of me, <Guess you get to see me tear out the soul after all.>

“Well, I got something to show you first.” I said, holding up Tsuki no me for him.

<Wait, Isn’t this Noctis’ blade?>

“Yup. Idiot had to give it up, as well as his human form and his ability to control the Lunar Orb’s powers, in order to keep his heart. Turns out I got the blade.”

<Do you have anything else of his?> Umbra asked.

“Dunno. Lemme check.” I said, reaching into my arm and pulling out several glowing orbs. “Oh FUCK YEAH, WE HAVE MATERIA BITCHES!”

<Not so loud! But still, nice! Which ones we got?>

“From what I can tell, every single one he brought with him when he went to kill you. That means we’ve got Firaga, Firaga Burst, Blizzaga, Thundaga, Shadow Flames, Curaga, and-SWEET, WE GOT YOJIMBO!”

<Nice, but... Do we have a way to pay him?>

“Only if we can’t find his weak spots. We find those, all we need to do is kick ‘em and he’ll either do exactly what we want, or...” I started rubbing the back of my head. “He’ll try to kill us.

<Wait, so I could have done that and Noctis would have been able to have him fight me? DAMNIT!>

“Noctis doesn’t know about it. Besides, he’s too goody-goody to ever use it even if he did know.”

<Eh, he would probably turn on us quickly, so maybe we should just start stealing money wherever we go as well as kill, steal souls, and make heartless.>

“No need.” I said, pulling out a small leather object. “I got his wallet!”

<I thought it was empty...>

“Are you kidding? Noctis has several million gil saved up from missions and such.”

<Wow, talk about plot convenience.>

“Yeah. I really don’t like this feeling of invisible helpers, despite how lucky it makes us.”

<I’m sure it’s just that we’re paranoid.>

“Talk to the hand, cause the face ain’t listenin’.”

<Whatever, lets just go find our next sin for collection, since ‘Sloth’ isn’t here. We can get both ‘Wrath’ and ‘Greed’ from the library where we first arrived.>

“Sure thing bossless.”

<HA! I see what you did there!>

“Yeah, cool. So, to the tree again?”

<Eeyup.> Umbra’s voice did a southern accent for that.

“What’s with the sudden accent?”

<It’s a joke about one of the people on this world, who only really ever says ‘Eeyup’ or ‘Nnope’.>

“I see. So he’s retarded?”

<No one knows. Anyway lets get going.>

“Sure.” I said as Umbra warped us back to the library.

<Since there are two souls, it would be best if we each tried to harvest one at the same time.>

“So you have a second glove?”

<I always make backups.> He said as he tossed me a left hand version of the glove he was wearing.

“Nice.” I said, putting on the glove. “So, Wrath or Greed for you?” I asked.

<Depends, do you want to steal the soul of a baby dragon or a purple unicorn?>

“I want to steal the soul of the one who shocked Die. Despite the fact that I hate her guts, I still desire revenge against the one who hurt her. Stupid remnants of Noctis’ emotions.”

<... We could use those emotions, you know.>

“Oh, how so?”

<The Unversed. They are personified emotions. Anyway, the one you want is ‘Wrath,’ which is in the purple unicorn.> He said before opening the window quietly, and jumping in. I followed him and opened the first door, in which slept a small purple unicorn and a titchy purple and green lizard.

<On 3.> he said, putting himself over the dragon.

“1.”

<2...>

I tensed up and waited a moment, before hearing <FIVE!> Shouted in my mind, and seeing Umbra’s hand shoot into the lizard’s chest.

“The fuck?” I said, before rushing the now awake unicorn and jamming my left hand into her, and pulling out her soul.

<Sins captured, making sinblades.> Umbra said, an orb of metal appearing in his gloved hand, which became a metalic red, and formed a simpler keyblade, while another orb dropped into my own gloved hand, which formed a different blade of sin.

“The fuck was that? Five?”

<Reference to a glorious comedy group, dubbed ‘Monty Python.’>

“Well fuck Monty, and his Pythons.”

<Whatever.>

“So, we’ve got four sins now. All we need is Lust, Sloth, and Gluttony, and we’re done. And it hasn’t even been one day yet? Seriously, this is definitely too easy.”

<Assumed wielder of ‘Lust’ lives outside town, so that one should be easy since we can make all the noise we want there. ‘Sloth’ is nowhere to be found at the moment, but we’ll deal with that in the daytime. So that leaves Gluttony.>

“Fun. Hey, on the off chance that we lose, what happens to the sinblades?”

He looked deep in thought for a moment before saying, <I don’t know, this isn’t anything like the keybade of hearts, which dissipated when Sora turned himself into a heartless with it to free another. So I can assume that if we complete the final form of the blades, which would be, as you called it ‘False Harmony,’ that it really shouldn’t disappear, since it’s souls and not hearts that made it.>

“So we’ve still doomed a world by eliminating its heroes. I like it. Even if we lose, we win.”

<Indeed, so then, to gluttony?>

“Sure, so where’s she hiding?”

“HI! I’M PINKIE PIE!”

I jumped back as a pink pony, with a mane and tail that looked like cotton candy, jumped out from between us, completely defying the laws of physics.

<Well, that would be her. The only pony to truly defy any and every law of physics.>

“Um, what are you talking about?”

<... You can hear me? Even though I’m using private though-speech?>

“OOOH, is that telepathy, are you psychic? Can you tell what I’m thinking-oOOH can you control my mind? Are you controlling it right now or are you making me think you’re controlling my mind or-OOOOH nice gloves!” She said at a mile a minute.

Umbra let out a small grin, <Would you like to take a closer look at them?> He asked.

“Maybe later, right now I have to-*GASP*-, I totally have to throw you a party!” She said, bounding off, leaving an after-image.

“Umbra.”

<This... Isn’t good, If that party is thrown, we’ll be revealed to the whole town.>

“Actually, we could turn this to our advantage.”

<... I see what you’re getting at, if we get ‘Lust’ before hand, we could get both ‘Sloth’ and ‘Gluttony’ at the party, right?>

“Yeah. So, to Lust’s house?”

<Indeed, this one should be the easiest.>

“How so? Is she gonna try and seduce us or something?”

<No, she is generally depicted as weak and powerless in comparison to the others. Now then lets go.> he said as he opened up a dark passage under us, only to pop out next to a small hut at the forest’s edge.

“Woah, that’s a lot of animals.” I said, a little creeped out by all the eyes staring at us.

<She’s basically the town veterinarian. Just be careful of the carnivorous ones.>

“Oh, come on, what harm could they possi-AGH, GETITOFFGETITOFFGETIFOFF!” I yelled as a white furball attached itself to my leg and immediately started chomping on it.

Umbra pulled the rabbit off my leg, <False alarm. It’s just her pet rabbit.>

“Rabbit? RABBIT!? IT’S MORE LIKE A FUCKING SAHAGIN WITH THE WAY IT TRIED TO CHOMP ON ME!”

<Eh, whatever.> he said as he crushed it’s throat.

“Good riddance, now where’s th-”

“ANGEL! YOU MONSTER!” A voice exclaimed.

<You were saying?> Umbra asked as he jabbed his hand out, stabbing it onto a butter colored pegasus.

“So Lust is ours. Now we’ve got two to go.” I said as Umbra created yet another sinblade.

<Then we’ll have the full set. Lucky thing the pink one is obsessed with parties. Unless this is the ‘Cupcakes’ universe...> Umbra shuddered.

“Something tells me I don’t wanna know.” I said with a raised eyebrow.

<In the cupcakes universe, one of the ponies, the pink one from before, is a psychopath killer who butchered the wielder of ‘Sloth,’ and made her into baked, frosted goods.>

“Dude, I want to kill every living thing and even I think that’s fucked up.” I said, shivering.

<Well you weren’t serving meat to a herbivorous communities disguised as pastries.>

“Good point.”

<If this IS that universe, we leave quickly and never return, collecting ‘Sloth’ and ‘Gluttony’ from another world.>

“Wait, if this is that universe, wouldn’t Gluttony have already turned Sloth into cupcakes?”

<Thats what I just said.>

“No, you said we’d leave and get them from another world, I pointed out that if this is that universe, then sloth is dead. Though I doubt that she is.”

<Yes, so we can go to an alternate version of this world and find ‘Sloth’ again.>

“Well, I think Sloth is alive here. Trust me, I know psychotic, and while Gluttony is crazy, she’s definitely not psychotic.”

<Good, I don’t want to risk being pullen apart by a madmare with a chainsaw if we go to the party.>

“Why did you say pullen? It’s pulled.”

<Speaking habit.>

“Ah. Let’s get to wherever this party is before we die of old age.”

<Best way to find a pinkie party is to not try. Lumos learned that lesson the slow way.>

“Oooookaaaaaaay?” I said, forgetting about the party in a moment of confusion.

<Summarization of events: Lumos spent three hours trying to find it, moment he gave up, it happened.>

“Wow, that’s...weird. The moment he gives up, lady luck smiles on him? Does that happen to him a lot?”

<Not really, no.>

“Ok then. So where to next?”

<It doesn’t matter really, the party is always random... I think I’ll go to the forest for a little bit, let out some anger on the local wildlife.>

“Well, I’ll go back to town, maybe see if the library has some useful information, as unlikely as that is.” I said, walking towards the town. “If you need me, yell ‘I NEED AN ADULT!’ with that mind thing.”

Umbra chuckled, <Ok, just beware of flaming unicorns.>

“Wait, what? What do you mean flaming unicorns?”

<The purple unicorn you took wrath from can make herself catch fire with no harm to her own body.>

“Um, how would she do that without her soul? She’s essentially an empty husk.”

<Magic is biological here, not spiritual, there are glands in the brains of unicorns made for holding magic.>

“Ok then. Well, see ya Umbra. Don’t kill too many of the forest’s inhabitants.”

<Whatever.> He said as he flew off on a dark platform.

“Ok-wait! I forgot to give you wrath back! Aw, dammit.” I said, as he was already gone. “Dammit, how do I make it disappear? Ah, forget it.”

I just placed Wrath on my back as I walked back towards town, merely content with imagining the entire place burning to the ground as I navigated the empty streets. Eventually, after many, many detours, I found the library again. As I walked inside, I felt a presence. And then the lights came on.

“SURPRISE!”

“Aw, fuck.”