Awake? Flicker didn’t need to be awake, he just needed to be moving. After flinging himself out of his bed, he had left his sleeping companions in their room and now he made his way through almost empty halls looking for Wicked. He felt a powerful need to do something about the rat menace facing the city from down below and it gnawed at it his mind, gnawing away at his conscience, well, like rats.

The sun had not yet risen and Flicker wasn’t quite all there, but he had the presence of mind to be aware of it. There had been a shortage of sleep as of late, but it wasn’t anything that he couldn’t handle. It was all part of the job and he needed to learn to function as best as he could under these conditions. He yawned without opening his mouth, forcing it through his nose, which caused him to let out a squeak.

To make matters worse, he’d had nightmares all night, but he couldn’t quite remember what they were or what they had been about. Now, the feeling of unknown dread lingered with him, turning his mood a little black. He hadn’t even combed his mane or brushed his coat, which was matted from sweating while he slept. Flicker looked manic, or perhaps a bit frantic.

Ears perking, he heard the sound of Wicked’s pegleg tapping against the floor. He focused upon the sound, his head tilting off to one side, and he headed off for the kitchen area, knowing that he would find Wicked there, no doubt checking up on breakfast.

A look of amused worry was upon Wicked’s face as the two ponies stared at one another. Flicker, looking a bit out of sorts, stared at his mentor, while his mentor studied the colt standing before him. Nothing had been said yet, but that was about to change and Flicker was already filling his lungs.

“When do we begin the invasion down below?” Flicker asked.

“We don’t,” Wicked replied.

“What?” Flicker was unaware that the volume of his voice had increased a great deal. “What do you mean by that? The enemy is amassing beneath us!”

“All the more reason to be careful and not go rushing in,” Wicked said in a nonchalant manner. He kicked out his wooden leg and held it up for Flicker to view. “I went rushing off ‘alf-cocked once, and look what it did to me… just look! It’s a lesson I’ll not forget!”

Squinting, Flicker’s eyes made a reluctant downturn and he looked at the wooden leg being held out for him to view. The colt deflated as he let out a sigh and his ears splayed out, then tugged to a back facing angle. Unable to respond, Flicker began to grind his teeth together, which made a dreadful sound.

“We’re going to wait and be patient.” Wicked, hearing the sound of Flicker’s teeth grinding together, looked worried and concerned. “Yer going to take your candle exam—”

Flicker’s eyes went wide and the grinding ceased.

“—and probably your fencing exam with Mister Gambit as well. We’re going to fall back on routine and everypony is going to calm down so we’re all level-’eaded. And when I decide that it is a good time, we’ll do something, but not a moment before.” Wicked put his wooden leg back down upon the floor and leaned forward to place his weight on it. “This is part of the job, Lad… anticipation. Ye need to learn to deal with it, Lad.”

“We should strike while the iron is hot.” Flicker, hearing his own words, realised how half-hearted they sounded, and then he thought about how he sounded like a whiny, petulant foal. He needed a way to prove his point while still sounding like an adult. The colt stood there, the wheels of his brain turning, but no solutions were offered to his dilemma. Try as he might, he couldn’t make a more reasonable argument or a more compelling reason. Without meaning to do so, he found himself staring at the hideous scars that could be seen all over Wicked’s legs.

“Yer a smart one, Flicker,” Wicked said in a low voice, “and I can already see that yer using yer ‘ead. Ready yerself, when the time comes, ye’ll be one of the first that I call on.”

After several long seconds of staring, Flicker nodded.

“Night Light’ll be by later,” Wicked mentioned as he lifted his head. “Before this day passes to night, ye’ll ‘ave done yer candle exam. Do not fail me.”

“Right.”

“Good luck, Lad…”

Flicker had his nose buried in a book, but it was difficult to study. He was filled with a pressing need to do something, anything, about the threat that lurked below. Maybe he was imagining it, but it felt as though his rat-sense was tingling and had been all morning. The feeling was driving him crazy, like a burr or a goathead thorn stuck in his frog.

He could feel the corner of his left eye twitching, which drove him to distraction. There was a hot, itchy sensation that spanned his belly, which left him restless and made it difficult to sit still. No doubt, this was all part of the lesson, the ability to perform while under stress. What he needed was release, but he didn’t know how to let out everything that was pent up inside of him. He didn’t have an outlet at the moment.

“I’m going crazy!” Flicker blurted out, startling his companions and causing Piper to drop her heavy book to the floor with a thump.

“This is… unexpected, coming from you.” Piper took a moment to compose herself, she drew in a deep breath, and she let it out in a slow, drawn out huff.

“There is just too much inside of my head, I can’t take it!” Flicker snapped his book shut, put it down, closed his eyes, and then tried to avoid grinding his teeth together. “I’m the doer, I do things, I make things happen! I can’t stand sitting around and doing nothing when there is something that needs to be done! And it is driving me crazy that Wicked is right and rushing in would be terrible, but that’s what I do, I rush in because I’m the doer!”

Eyebrow arched, Hennessy looked up and glanced over at his friend, his expression one of disturbed concern. Saying nothing, his lips pressed together, the earth pony colt turned his head to look in Piper’s direction for a moment. Ears perking, Piper exchanged a glance with Hennessy, and then to both of their surprise, Flicker got up and left the room, moving with the sort of speed born by a surplus of manic energy.

The door shut with a soft click, leaving Piper and Hennessy in their room together.

It was almost painful, the realisation that he was still very much a foal, that he thought like one and had moments where he acted like one. For the past year, he had sank so far into himself that he had almost forgotten his own age. He had given up far too much of his own self trying to live up to his own cutie mark, trying to become whatever it was that he was meant to be.

Now, he wasn’t sure who he was.

He was having a crisis that he couldn’t even identify or explain. If he had some interest in music, he might’ve been able to listen and take his mind off of things. Had he some interest in art, he might have found some way to blow off a little steam and release some of the pressure building up inside of him. His feelings had become a dull thing, something shoved to the background and for the most part, ignored.

Now, they couldn’t be ignored and he had no way to cope.

Lifting the heavy wooden sword, Flicker prepared to fall back on all he knew, and he eyed the wooden training dummy. The wooden sword trembled in his grip, it quivered in his unsteady telekinesis. He didn’t even have his own room anymore, his own private sanctuary, the place where he could let himself go in solitude. Now, he was in the gym with others watching, eyeing him, sizing him up, and no doubt wondering what was wrong with him.

His fury uncorked itself as he did a charging downward slice, a move of pure power. A savage scream filled the gym and Flicker didn’t even realise that it was he who was screaming. The events of the day before, his own impatience, his shortcomings, his own foalish foolishness, it came out as pure, unbridled rage as he struck.

The sword shattered on impact, and so did the wooden training dummy. Even the metal frame gave way from the terrific blow and the dummy was sundered, dissevered in two. Heads turned and every eye in the gym was now on Flicker and the wrecked training dummy, which was now in pieces on the floor. Mister Balister and Mister Pepper, both present, took a moment to look at each other, and it was Mister Balister who took it upon himself to approach Flicker.

Mister Balister, a fearless, hard sort, looked a bit hesitant as he approached.

“Talk to me, colt, you okay?” Mister Balister paused about two yards away and eyeballed Flicker in a wary manner.

“No,” Flicker admitted as he dropped the remains of the grip of the wooden sword that he had shattered. It clattered to the floor and Flicker looked over at Mister Balister. “I’m not well at all. I think I’m having a bad day.”

“Son, I just watched you cleave a steel and wood training dummy in half… with a wooden sword. I think that qualifies as a bit more than a bad day. You’ve earned the right to be open and honest with me.” Mister Balister moved forward, but did so in a cautious, careful manner, as he if he was approaching a caged beast and he wasn’t certain that the cage would hold. “Talk to me, son.”

“I just feel moody,” Flicker said in a low voice, feeling embarrassed. “Sulky. I know that Wicked is right about something, but I still want to do what I want anyway, and everything in my head feels all messed up.”

Using his magic, Mister Balister pushed the debris of the shattered sword and the broken training dummy away from Flicker. It could be repaired later with a spell, and dealing with it wasn’t important now. When he was done moving the debris away, his horn didn’t dim, and he focused on Flicker with a caring, but harsh looking stare.

Mister Balister only had hard affection, it was the only thing he knew.

“I feel stupid because I want to be an adult about this, but I keep having these foalish moments. My mood feels all wrong and I feel out of sorts. I woke up feeling agitated, mean, and even though I know I’m wrong, I want to prove that I am right somehow.”

Mister Balister gave Flicker a cautious smile. “Son, sounds like puberty.” He said it as a joke to lighten the mood, and as such, he was surprised by Flicker’s reaction.

“Really?”

In an instant, Mister Balister’s cautious demeanour vanished and he became authorative again. His smile took a hike and he took a more aggressive stance. “Yep. Sounds like it. Don’t let it get the best of you. It’s happened to everypony that you see here.” The somewhat older, middle-aged pony gestured with his foreleg at the other apprentices in the gym. “They wake up one morning as moody, unmitigated assholes, and then I have to sort them out. Puberty is a rotten thing to go through, son. Give it about five to seven years or so and it will go away.”

“Oh.” Flicker looked relieved. “Adolescence. That makes sense. I’ve grown a lot and I’ve been eating a lot more than I normally do. Thanks, Mister Balister, I think I’ll go and sort my own self out.” Sighing, Flicker turned around and began to walk away, kicking past the remains of the broken dummy.

“Son, you go and do that.” Mister Balister drew in a deep breath, held it for several seconds as Flicker walked away, and then when Flicker was at the door, the stallion let out a sigh of relief and visibly relaxed. “Pucker factor on that one was pretty damn high, if I do say so myself.” He turned to look at the other apprentices, who were still staring. “What are you looking at? Back to work, all of you! NOW!”

Puberty. Adolescence. A period in one’s life of temporary insanity, bad decision making, and irrational behaviour. At least Flicker now had a reason for feeling the way he did and it was something of a relief to have an excuse for being so out of sorts. He had entered the next stage of life and was now in a period of transition. Insanity and uncertainty were expected. He was supposed to be defiant, sulky, and moody.

It all made sense and now, now he could just wait it out.

Five to seven years was quite a stretch, but Flicker would see it through somehow. It was a period of chaos, a time of unpredictability, but it would pass and then glorious order would be restored. At least for now, he had an excuse, a reason.

“Flicker, just the pony I was looking for…”

Ears perking, Flicker knew that voice. “Night Light.”

“In the flesh,” Night Light replied. “I just finished talking with Wicked and now, I’ve started my talk with you. Come with me, Flicker, and let’s have a chat.”

“I’m having a rough morning,” Flicker responded, feeling it was only fair to give Night Light a fair warning. “Mister Balister says that I just started puberty and it’s making me moody.”

There wasn’t even a hint of a smile or amusement on Night Light’s face. Looking very serious and concerned, Night Light nodded. “We can talk about that, too. My goodness, Twilight was a terror when she crossed the threshold, and she spent about a year writing essays on all of the ways that biology and nature had offended her and her sensibilities. She demanded to know why modern medicine hadn’t invented a cure for this insufferable condition, or some means to alleviate it.”

Blinking, Flicker just stood there, unable to process what had just been said. He didn’t want to think about Princess Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship, the Warrior Princess of Equestria, having puberty issues. Nope, these were thoughts that were unhealthy to have and they all had to go. If only there was some means of making them go away. Flicker shuddered on the inside, where it couldn’t be seen.

Sighing, Night Light moved closer to Flicker, patted the colt on his side, and said in a low whisper, “We’ll get everything sorted out, we’ll have a crack study session, have some tea, and then you, you are going to take your exam and it’ll be one less thing for you to worry about as you go through your transition.”

“Okay.”

“Good, let’s go.”

Author's Notes:

Coming soon: Princess Filly Twilight Sparkle and the Elements of Hormoney.