We find our heroes the next in the ballroom getting ready to continue their watching spree of DEATH BATTLE. But their progress was halted by a certain blue pegasus.

“OH COME ON TWILIGHT! Can’t we just skip this one!?” complained Rainbow Dash.

“For the last time dash, NO!” Twilight yelled. Getting frustrated with her rainbow maned friend’s constant whining.

“You just got to grit your teeth and bear it Dash.” added in Applejack.

The blue speedster let out a load groan of frustration as the rest of the group took their seats in front of the television.

“Aaaand start!” sang Twilight as she clicked play.

Interlude
(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

Wiz: The Mushroom Kingdom is a world that houses many strange and interesting creatures, like the Goomba, a walking brown mushroom with fangs.

“A mushroom?” Applejack asked, confused by this fighter.

“With fangs?” Fluttershy asked, equally confused as her blonde friend.

“Teehee that’s funny.” giggled Pinkie Pie as she handed out some cupcakes to her friends.

Boomstick: And the Koopa, that stupid turtle who always gets himself killed.

“WHAT?” Rainbow yelled, mad that the host was disrespecting a turtle. Her little outburst caused her to drop her cupcake.

Wiz: Every video game has its share of basic endless common enemies, and you can't get anymore common than these two.

Boomstick: But which is the best of the worst? He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

“This is gonna be lame,” Spike said, grabbing a handful of gems and shoving them in his mouth.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.

Goomba
(*Cues: Melty Molten Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*)

Wiz: The Goomba's used to be steadfast allies of the Mushroom Kingdom. After years of oppression due to their low intelligence and short stature, they betrayed their own mushroom brethren and became the backbone of Bowser's vast army.

“They would betray their own brethren?” Twilight questioned.

“Those no good varmints!” raged applejack. Disgusted that they would turn their backs on what Applejack saw as their family. Rainbow Dash also glared at the goombas on the sole fact that they would betray someone and join the bad guy.

Boomstick: The Goomba's main combat strategy is just to walk directly into its opponents. While this isn't the smartest thing to do, it takes some real "spores" if you know what I'm sayin'. Plus, they also have these vampire fangs, but they don't ever seem to use them, and... thinking about it, why does a mushroom even have a mouth?

Basic Combat Strategies:
Charges into opponents
Not very strong
Adapts well to various environments
Useless Fangs

“That’s their strategy? Walk into their opponents?” Twilight said, her eye twitching a bit.

“Even I find that dumb.” Pinkie Pie surprisingly deadpanned.

Wiz: When available, the Goomba will, use the green Goomba's Shoe to get the jump on its foes, easily able to hop over twelve feet in the air. Goomba's can also sprout wings becoming Paragoomba, capable of barely sustained flight.

Goomba's Shoe:
Gives jumping ability
Cannot be pierced by Spikes or Spinies
Also called "Kuribo's Shoe"
Can be stolen easily

“Oh great this losers can can fly know.” snarked rainbow dash with even Fluttershy nodding in agreement. Annoyed that this little creatures were pretty much mocking the one thing all peguses took pride in.

Boomstick: And when flyin', the mushroom thing can bomb victims below with Micro-Goombas. You know you're a badass when you throw babies as weapons!

“NO IT DOES NOT!!!” screamed the terrified group, quickly growing to hate the goomba’s.

Paragoomba Wings:
Enables slow flight
Better suited for hovering
Easily clipped
Can drop Micro-Goombas as living bombs
Baby Killers

Wiz: The traditional Goomba may seem a useless pawn, but these troopers have been know to accomplish the impossible.

The girls and one dragon could only gawk at the sight of a goomba holding a baseball bat without arms or magic.

Boomstick: Wait a minute, is that Goomba playing baseball? With no hands? Oh my God, it has telepathy powers!

Wiz: Telekinesis? No, it doesn't.

Boomstick: Well then how's it holdin' it?!

“That’s what we would like to know.” Rarity said.

Telekinesis Powers?:
Can use baseball bats w/o hands & arms
Not really, they're just weird like that...

Wiz: Goomba's are unwaveringly brave, never backing down from a fight and always ferociously charging into battle without hesitation. Though, sometimes their stubborn courage can backfire.

“Sounds like someone I know.” snarked Applejack. Giving her blue friend a flat look witch she returned in full.

Boomstick: Yeah, you'd think it would stop walking when impending death is directly in front of it.

Everyone facepalmed at that one.

Wiz: After dissecting a ...voluntary Goomba myself, I discovered it's brain to be less than half the size of an acorn, proving what we've always known...

Boomstick: Goomba's are fuckin' morons.

After that quick review of the goomba’s, everyone admitted that the goomba’s where lame.

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Koopa
(*Cues: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - Castle Theme*)

Wiz: Bowser's second most common foot soldier is the Koopa Troopa, the Turtle Warrior.

Boomstick: Like Ninja Turtles!?

“Awesome!” yelled Pinkie.

Wiz: No, not Ninja Turtles.

Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: Awh...

“Those sounds awesome!” cheered rainbow dash, with everyone agreeing that ninja turtles did sound surprisingly cool.

Wiz: While the Goombas are the backbone, the Koopas are prevalent enough to have Bowser's army named the "Koopa Troop".

“Aw ya! Of course a turtle would be cool enough to have a troop named after them!” cheered Rainbow Dash, getting a few laughs from her friends.

Boomstick: Koopas have their own set of Paratroopa wings that can fly for several minutes with no problem.

“Well at least it’s better than the goombas” Applejack commented.

Paratroopa Wings:
Enables slow flight
Decent aerial control
Easily clipped
Not exactly the best flyers

Wiz: Koopas are also fairly skilled in Tennis, Baseball, Basketball and Go-kart driving.

“That turtle is pretty talented,” Twilight said

“Wonder if Tank could do some of those things?” Rainbow asked, imagining her pet playing all kinds of sports with her.

Other Skills:
Various Sports
Running Banks
Creating seaside resorts
Go-Kart Racing
Ruining safaris
Forming lame gangs

Boomstick: Are you sure it's not a Ninja Turtle?

Wiz: Their best offence is also their finest defence, the Koopa shell, made of a tough steel-like substance capable of withstanding over 200 pounds of pressure.

Boomstick: As an offensive weapon, the Koopa shell can destroy almost anything! It's a living torpedo of pain!

Koopa Shell:
Extremely durable
Withstand over 200 lbs.
Demolishes anything that is destructible
Bounces off walls
Comes in a variety of collectible colors

“AWESOME!!” yelled the blue speedster.

Wiz: There seems to be a common misconception that it takes Mario two hits to kill a Koopa. Actually, it only takes one. There just happens to be this durable shell in the way. However, this leads to the Koopa's greatest weakness. When Mario jumps on a Koopa's back, rather than retaliating, it retreats into its shell. Why?

Boomstick: 'Cause they're a bunch of pussies!

“They really cowards.” Rarity commented, even fluttershy was braver than this cowardly creatures.

Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. The Koopas are cowards, afraid to face a dangerous foe. Some run from danger but most just hide in their thick shell.

“Man I feel bad for tank being the same species as this chickens with shells.” Spike dryly commented

Boomstick: Then again, if I were carrying an impenetrable fortress on my back and... some large Italian man was trying to murder me, I'd probably hide in it too.

“I would have to agree with Mr. Boomstick there.” agreed fluttershy.

Wiz: But you'd think as soon as Mario picked up the shell, it would a perfect time to counterattack, right? And even when they're flying after a good kick, they refuse to stick their feet out and stop themselves.

Boomstick: Well... eh... ah, yeah, you're right, they're bitches.

“Agreed.” everyone said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the analyzing was done. It was pretty quick to see who was on which team.

Goomba: no one.

Koopa: Rainbow Dash Pinkie Pie.

Everyone else: neutral.

Now that the “teams” were set, twilight quickly hit play.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all.

Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Death Battle

(*Cues: Super Marioland Theme - Remix*)

The Koopa emerges from a Warp Pipe and calmly walks through the field. When he meets the Goomba, he stops.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: King Bowser - Super Mario Galaxy*)

The Koopa and the Goomba both sprout wings, becoming the Paratroopa and the Paragoomba. They take to the air and fly into each other 4 times. After flying in a circle, the Koopa tries to hit the Goomba by doing something similar to the Spin Dash from Sonic the Hedgehog, but misses. As the Goomba smiles, the Koopa ricochets of a wall and hits the Goomba, who falls under a Thwomp, which he manages to avoid, He also avoids 3 more Thwomps but gets hit again by the Koopa, who is squashed under a fifth Thwomp.

The Goomba lands near a cannon, followed by the Koopa. As they both fly up, the cannons fire at them both. As they dodge the cannonballs and Bullet Bills, they trade a few blows. The Koopa tries to hit the Goomba using the trick he tried earlier, but mises and continuously ricochets of the walls again. When he stops, 6 Bullet Bills fly up, but the Goomba stops them by dropping Micro-Goombas onto them. After dodging 2 more Bullet Bills, the Goomba and Koopa are high in the air. As they fly into each other some more, the Angry Sun attacks the Goomba and the Koopa. While the Koopa successfully evades the Sun, the Goomba is hit and loses his wings. Luckily, he lands in a Kuribo's Shoe. As the Koopa descends, the Goomba hops towards his opponent in the shoe.

The Koopa hides under a line of Breakable Blocks as the Goomba hops on the Blocks above him. The Koopa tries to escape by flying to the right then quickly flying into the pipe, but the Goomba hits the Koopa, knocking him into the Pipe. The Goomba hops after the Koopa, but gets attacked by a Piranha Plant emerging from the pipe. The Koopa (who lost his wings from the attack) come out the other end of the pipe, to meet a group of Red Goombas who live underground. The Goomba appears and hits the Koopa, causing him to hide in his shell. As the Red Goombas dance victoriously, the Goomba spots a pool of Lava near the Koopa. The Red Goombas continue to dance as the Goomba advances towards the Koopa and kicks him, causing him to slide towards the lava. Luckily, the pool of Lava is small enough for the Koopa to slide over it and hit a block, causing him to slide into the Goomba and the Red Goombas. Unfortunately, he also slides into a much larger pool of Lava, reducing him to a skeleton (Dry Bones ).

“That… was… AWESOME!!!” screamed rainbow dash. While everyone was stunned on how intense the battle was

Double K.O.!

Results
(*Cues: Desolate Path - Super Mario 64*)

Boomstick: Oh man, I thought this was gonna suck! That was awesome! Who knew those little fuckers could fight like that?

“A’ll say!” a stunned Applejack commented.

Wiz: The Goomba's arsenal proved effective enough, but its own stupidity became its downfall.

“Good tools are are mere toys in the hands of a simpleton.” Twilight said.

Boomstick: Then the Koopa wussed out and kept to the safety of his shell, not stopping in time to avoid the Giant Pool of Lava Death.

“A huge blunder on his part.” deadpanned Rarity.

Wiz: Even the Koopa's tough shell can't protect it from fire.

“Poor things.” whimpered fluttershy.

Boomstick: You might say this battle really heated up in the end.

Cue facepalm and one laughing fit from Pinkie.

Wiz: This battle is a Draw.

END.

Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle.

The main Six and Spike are now expecting a more exciting fight and they seem to have their wish granted. What they see are two manly, shirtless hulking men that looked like they were overdosed with testosterone with epic facial hair and are now being pitted against each other in earth shattering battle.

“.....” The girls and one drake stared at the scene after seeing that epic trailer.

“NEXT EPISODE NOW!!!” the rest of the group yelled as twilight hastily hit play.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CHAPTER END. Next episode Mike haggar VS. Zangief Next Chapter: Haggar VS Zangief. Estimated time remaining: 14 Hours, 11 Minutes