As the Princesses and I walked up to the Carne Den/my home, Bumblebee in tow, we saw a bunch of sleeping ponies laid out on the ground nearby, all neatly in rows. The only ponies that were up and awake were Applejack and Rainbow, who were busy filling the pit back up. Upon noticing us, Rainbow dashed over. “So, did you beat that thing?”

“We did,” I answered with a tired sigh. “What happened over here?”

“Well, Applejack and I figured that, if the controlled ponies were left alone, they’d probably make their way to the farm and make it an impossible fight for you, so we started herding them into the pit to keep them away. After we got the last one in, the peytrals flew off and everypony fell asleep. Twilight checked them, took off, and then we started getting them back out.”

Applejack came up and continued. “We finished getting them out about ten minutes ago and started filling the pit back up. Mind lending a helping hoof?”

“Sure thing,” Twilight happily said before going over to the dirt pile and moving the stuff back in with her magic.

“Well, that’s all good,” I said before turning back to the Princesses. “If you two don’t mind, I’m going to put Bumblebee away and pack up some clothes.”

“That’s alright,” Celestia politely said.

“Is there anything we can do for you, Yang?” Luna asked.

I stopped to think for a moment. “If you see Gilda, can you tell her I’m taking today and tomorrow off to rest from today’s fight?”

“Not a problem.”

As I approached the shed, I took stock of my physical condition. There was dirt across my body, on my clothes, and worst of all, in my cleavage. It was almost like having a rock in my boot, of which there actually was one. Bumblebee would need a good wash down as well, but aside from the dirt, she didn’t look to have taken any damage. Whoever or whatever had built her knew what they were doing.

After putting Bumblebee away, I took a moment to get the worst of the dirt out of my chest and the rock out of my boot. After that, I went out, leapt up to my open window, and clambered inside, gracelessly tumbling onto the hardwood floor. “Note to self: put a rug or something under the window.” After getting back up, I quickly found my backpack and started the process of packing for a short trip. A change of casual clothes and my robe were easy enough, though I found myself debating between which swimwear to bring for the spa. “I like the swimsuit more, but the bikini would make it easier for the spa ponies there.” During the mental tennis match between bikini and swimsuit, the floor fell out from under the players as another question came to mind. “Why am I even trying to figure this out? I’m going there to talk, get clean, and relax. I’ll just bring both and choose later.”

After double checking everything, I closed my window and went downstairs. Asada was curled up in her corner, asleep. Whether she’d just gotten there or was there before I ran in earlier, I had no idea. I decided to lean in and pet her a bit anyways.

Whatever she had been doing before falling asleep, it must have really tired her out because she didn’t react to my petting at all. A vicious chin and ear scratching didn’t do much either, eliciting only a slight tilting of her head. “I’ll be back tomorrow, Asada.” After patting her shoulder, I went out the front door and saw Gilda standing there. “Hey Gilda,” I greeted, tiredness clear in my voice.

“So, you got in another big fight?” Gilda asked. Her concerned face soon turned into a relieved smile. “Well, I’m glad it turned out alright. Go take your royal spa trip. You’ve earned it. I got the place covered. Should be quiet and boring for once.”

“Thanks.” After a friendly salute, I joined the Princesses and Pinkie nearby. With only a few nods between us, we were on our way to the train station. “So. . .”

“We will explain that golem’s origins and the past at the spa” Luna calmly and firmly stated. “In the meantime, we would greatly appreciate it if you simply rested on the way there.”

I gave Luna a halfhearted inquisitive look. “Are you giving me a royal order to take a nap?”

“No, Yang. I am giving you a royal suggestion to take a nap.”

“Okay, but why?”

“So you don’t fall asleep during the spa trip.”

I had to think Luna’s reasoning through a few times before it clicked. “Oh, I get it. Yeah, that does sound good.”

It didn’t take long for us to get to the train station, even with me starting to stumble around a bit. The stallion in the ticket booth sold us our tickets, and helpfully informed us that the train was fifteen to twenty minutes away.

We sat down to wait for the train. While the ponies were talking, my eyes were getting heavy, and I soon found myself asleep against Celestia’s side, using her wing as a blanket and nestling in against her body’s warmth.

Someone gently shook me. “Wake up, Yang,” came Celestia’s gentle voice. “We’re only a couple minutes from Canterlot.”

I slowly opened my eyes and yawned. “We are?”

“Yes. As much as I like our little arrangement here, I wouldn’t mind having my wing back.”

“Hm?” I looked down and saw that I was still holding Celestia’s wing around myself. “Oh, right.” I let go of the wing, and as I stood up to stretch, Celestia brought the wing back to her side. “Did I miss anything?”

“Nothing important,” Twilight answered as she did some stretching herself. “We just decided to take our own naps while you were asleep. Thankfully, I know a wake-up spell that works like an alarm clock.”

“Nifty.” Still blinking the sleep out of my eyes, I looked around the room for my backpack. I found it on the bench I had been sleeping on, and just after I put it back on, the train started slowing down. “Where’s Pinkie?”

“She went to the dining car when we got on. I can only imagine the chaos that’s happened in there.”

Pinkie, at the train’s drink bar, finished her cup of tea with a dainty sip before gently dabbing her lips with a handkerchief. “The tea was most exquisite, good sir,” she said with the most proper and elegant voice she had.

The bartender replied in an equally classy voice. “Why thank you, m’lady. I only aspire to make the best tea I can. But if you would be willing to oblige, I would like to ask of you a simple question.”

Pinkie slid her teacup, saucer, and used handkerchief over to the bartender. “I would be delighted to answer your question, sir.”

The bartender’s expression went from classy to mildly exasperated in a moment, as did his voice as he lightly slammed his forehooves on the bar. “How did you drink that much sugar and not start flying all over the car like a pegasus?”

Pinkie shrugged and smiled. “It’s simple, really. I’m Pinkie Pie.”

“But-”

Pinkie gently shushed the bartender with a hoof on his muzzle. “Shh. It’s best not to go down that road, amusing as it may be for others.”

“I pity anyone stuck with her,” I said as the train came to a stop.

Shortly after the three alicorns and I stepped off, a regiment of royal guards formed up around us, acting as escorts. Celestia, without reacting, turned to me. “Yang, would you like to send your belongings to the castle?” At her inquiry, a pegasus guard moved inwards towards me.

“No thanks, Princess,” I answered. “Just having a guide to a room for me is good enough. That, and, well. . .” I wracked my brain to try and come up with a way to explain the swimsuits and nudity taboo to Celestia in a way I was comfortable with.

“It’s a cultural thing, Celestia,” Twilight interjected. “I can tell you more later.”

“Ah, I see,” Celestia said in an understanding tone before turning to the eager to serve pegasus. “Please see to it that Yang has a warm room ready for her upon our arrival.”

The guard gave a sharp salute. “As you command, Princess.” Without another word, he took off for the castle to carry out his orders.

Our arrival at a spa, simply called The Canterlot Spa, came with little fanfare or flair. Most of the guards stayed outside while a few came in with us. Those guard ponies took their jobs seriously.

“Hello, Princesses,” the light purple unicorn mare behind the desk greeted. “Five today?”

I looked into the middle of our group and saw Pinkie there. The guards who had come in with us also looked, briefly on high alert before they realized who it was, taking a deep breath, and quietly saying to themselves, “It’s just Pinkie, everything is fine.”

Celestia, for her part, took the whole thing in stride. “Yes. We would like one of your more private baths, if you don’t mind.”

“Of course, your Highness,” the mare said as she made a few notes. “Will you have your usual treatments?”

“Yes.”

“Alright.” The mare made a few more notes before levitating the clipboard through a cleverly disguised opening in the wall. “If you’ll follow me, please.” The five of us followed the mare back into the spa, down some stairs, and into a cavernous room, filled with every kind of spa treatment imaginable, each one looking very regal and expensive. “If you need anything, just ring the bell and somepony will be here in seconds. Before I leave, is there anything I can do for you?”

“Have somepony ready to clean our regalia and Yang’s clothes,” Luna said as she and Celestia started levitating their regalia off. “If you could have them come down in, hmm, Yang, how long would it take for you to get ready for the water?”

I briefly did some mental calculations before answering. “Five minutes or so.”

Luna turned back from me to the mare. “A little over five minutes, please.”

The mare bowed. “Of course, Princess. I will let our cleaners know immediately.” After leaving the bow, the mare left us, quietly closing the door behind us.

As I went to the bathroom to change, Celestia walked up next to Luna and asked, “Luna, could you explain something for me?”

Even after I closed the bathroom door, I could still hear the conversation. “If it’s about Yang needing time to get ready for the water, the answer is quite simple: human culture.”

“Their culture?”

“Yes, Celestia,” Twilight said as I started undressing. “Humans, as you may have observed with Yang, are naturally without a fur coat. Thus, they developed clothing in their early days to stay warm and protect themselves from their environments. As they advanced culturally and technologically, clothing became a bigger part of their lifestyle, becoming a way to denote ranks and jobs, along with being worn casually. Different cultures have different clothing as well.”

“So humans don’t like being exposed?”

“Generally, yes. There are oddball cases of people going around without clothes, but they tend to be off in the head, drunk, drugged up, or something similar. Tangentially related to that, there are different clothing standards for men and women, male and female respectively.”

“How different are they? Is it anything like the formal clothes seen at royal events?”

“Hmm, kind of?” I could almost hear the waving hoof in the tone as I neatly stacked up my combat clothes, Ember Celica off to the side. “Women have many more options of clothing than men, as can be seen in human clothing stores. Surprisingly, human and pony clothing styles and rules have many parallels between them.”

“That is quite interesting, Twilight.” Just as I started contemplating whether to wear the swimsuit or bikini, Celestia asked another question. “So, Yang has a wide variety of options at her disposal?”

“That is correct, sister,” Luna said. “However, she prefers more modest clothing.”

I turned to the door and shouted, “I’m right here, you know!” through it before resuming my contemplations.

“We know!” Luna responded through the door before continuing her conversation. “Every person, obviously, has their own preferences of clothing. Yang, according to her dreams, has a very good body, often associated with more. . . Tempting and distracting outfits, shall we say.”

“Hmmm. . .” Celestia hmmm’d.

In the following moment of silence, I had a brief epiphany. “I could just wear the swimsuit over the bikini, and just take it off as needed. Then again, it could somehow catch on the bikini and take a piece of it off, and that would be worse than just the bikini.” I finally made my decision, putting the swimsuit and Ember Celica away, my storm of self-conscious thoughts and arguments taking my focus away from the outside conversation as I put the bikini on. “The bikini is for practical reasons only, to make it easier for the spa ponies to work on me.

“But I’m going to be with royalty, so more decency is needed. That much skin isn’t appropriate.

“This is royalty that wears less to work than I do on a run. Heck, I’m wearing more now than they are, so they aren’t in a position to talk about decency.

“But-

“Twilight and Pinkie have seen me in this bikini already, Luna’s probably done so too through dreams, and I’ve probably worn it at the spa I went to in Los Pegasus. Or was it Las Pegasus? Why am I even getting hung up on this anyways?”

I’d already finished putting the bikini on a few seconds before shaking my head to clear my thoughts a bit. After collecting my folded up clothes for cleaning, I stepped out, seeing the mares already in the water. “So, where do I put these?” I asked all four of them.

“I will take them for cleaning,” came a stallion’s voice from the doorway. I turned and saw a tan unicorn there, already levitating Celestia and Luna’s regalia onto a special cart. “Do you have any special instructions for cleaning your clothes, Ms. Xiao Long?”

“Well, no,” I quietly answered as I held out the clothes. “Just. . . They’re not going to be damaged, right?”

“I promise, Ms. Xiao Long,” -he levitated the clothes onto his cart- “your clothes will not be damaged in the slightest.”

“Thanks. That was a silly request, wasn’t it?”

“Not at all,” the stallion said in a casual and politely dismissive tone. “If making the request makes your time here even a bit better, then there’s nothing silly about it. But, you can rest and relax assured that our cleaners will be very gentle with your clothes. Is there anything else you may need?”

“Well. . . No, there isn’t.”

“Then I will get the cleaning on these started.” The stallion left us, quietly closing the door behind him.

I turned to the soaking ponies and, with only a hint of trepidation, joined them in the water. The pleasantly warm water came up to my neck when I sat down next to Twilight and Pinkie, and I quickly forgot any concerns associated with wearing the bikini. Looking across the large spa pool, I saw Celestia and Luna just sitting there. I saw no bench under the water for them, just the bottom of the pool.

It didn’t take long for me to start relaxing. “So, did I miss anything?”

“No, nothing important,” Luna assured me before turning to Celestia. “Where shall we start our story, sister?”

“The way you start any story, Luna: the setting.” Celestia lit her horn and smoothed the middle of the pool’s water into a clear, glassy surface. A poke confirmed that it was still water, though there was a tingle of magic present. “Several thousand years ago, Equestria was a marvel of technology and magic.” The water’s surface glowed and it showed a huge city, complete with skyscrapers, flying vehicles buzzing around them, hovering vehicles on the street level, and ponies walking and flying about, some of which were carrying and wearing various numbers of gadgets. “It was truly the age of the spoiled. If there was something you wanted, there was a machine that could make it. Drinks, snacks, tools, toys, statues, anything.”

“That’s amazing, Celestia!” Twilight excitedly said.

“Of course, a population like this also needed food, and the farming techniques back then, with the help of magic and technology, were nothing short of spectacular.” The water moved upwards, quickly being sculpted and shaped into layers, giving the shape of a horizontally sliced hill. “With open terracing techniques, sunlight funnels, and harvesting machines, it was possible to get much more food per month out of an acre than is possible now.”

Luna flattened the water back down and took over. “Instantaneous communication across the planet was not only possible, but very easy. Equestria was the mightiest power in the world as well, as we were the builders of the things everyone across the world enjoyed. Whether it was multiform toys for children and collectors, rare crops, or clothing, we made it. With everyone so busy with hobbies, communication, and trade, there was no time for war. Even the politicians were too busy with their hobbies to become corrupt, and that did include us.”

“Something happened, didn’t it?” I interjected. Inwardly, I was amazed that the ponies actually did have internet at one point.

“Indeed, something did happen. It started when one of the weather machines malfunctioned and started going rogue.” The water came up and made the shape of a flying saucer with batteries of turrets near its perimeter, which came out to be just inches from my face. “These machines were remotely controlled, and very, very secure. At the same time, there were ponies that lived their lives on them, mostly pegasi.”

“That doesn’t sound too smart.”

“No, it wasn’t,” Luna lamented with a shake of her head. “Something happened with the biggest one. Control was lost, it had no emergency controls-”

“Brilliant move there,” I snarked.

“Indeed. It took over the smaller machines and began spreading foul weather, killing many ponies and other species. Celestia and I stepped in as swiftly as we could, destroying the smaller machines as we saw them.”

Celestia picked up the story, her tone somber. “By the time we reached the biggest one, the ponies that were living on it were all dead. Unlike the smaller ones, that one machine actually fought us.”

“How big was it, Celestia?” Twilight asked. At the same time, I noticed that Pinkie had been oddly quiet. I also saw that she had a pair of 3D goggles on and was eating popcorn out of a floating bowl. I turned back to the sisters and tried not to figure out how or why Pinkie was doing such a thing.

“Here’s us in comparison.” Two tiny water alicorns flew up and landed on the edge, dwarfed by a single turret battery. The tiny water ponies even waved at us. “As you can see, it’s huge. You could fit Cloudsdale in this machine ten times over and still have plenty of room to spare.”

“As for the fight, it wasn’t easy,” Luna said. “Wherever we flew, it could follow. If we hid underground, it flooded the tunnels. If that didn’t work, it could somehow mine with tornadoes. It took all the power Celestia and I had at the time, along with a spot of luck and very tight timing, to hit it with an eclipse beam.”

“Eclipse beam?” Twilight asked, clearly intrigued.

Celestia dispelled the weather machine before explaining with two and a half orbs of water, “You have the planet,” -the half orb floated into place near the water- “The moon,” -the smaller orb went above the half- “And the sun,” -The larger orb went above its watery compatriots- “All lined up like this. The moon helps focus the ring of solar energy into a tight, destructive beam. However, it comes at a cost, one we’ve decided isn’t worth it.”

Luna resumed. “Back then, my moon was larger.” Pinkie snortled at that. “The eclipse beam vaporized a significant portion of the surface, shrinking it down to the size it is now. In order to perform the eclipse beam, the moon is necessary.”

“So it’s an emergency technique then,” I concluded.

“The circumstances were quite dire indeed.”

“But what does that have to do with that golem?” Pinkie asked, only mad in the comical and silly way. “The ponies want answers to that now!”

“Of course. We did promise that.” Luna cleared her throat, dispelled the water construct, and soon, the water was back to making gentle waves. “It was a prison warden, one of many. Its job was to make sure that those under its protection were protected. With wings, horn, size, and strength, its mere presence was often enough to deter attackers and break up fights. The peytrals acted as a way to identify, locate, and, if need be, control those it guarded. It could control a pony so well, you would not have been able to tell they were being controlled at all.”

“So what made it so obvious this time?”

“Its semi-centralized control system. Instead of having all the bodily control functions in one place, the systems were spread out, though connected in one area as well. Every joint was responsible for the movement of the equivalent joint on a pony.”

“Wait a moment,” Twilight interrupted, somewhat confused. “Does that mean damaging one joint enough makes it lose control of that part of a pony?”

“It does render the pony’s joint stiff, yes.”

“But it was moving around just fine on the farm. How does that work?”

“You, of all ponies, should know that there is a difference between ‘enough damage’ and ‘rendered inoperable’.”

I could just imagine the gears in Twilight’s mind settling into place and clicking together. “Ah. So you two wrecked the leg joints below the barrel, the wings, and the horn, which is why pegasi didn’t fly, unicorns didn’t cast, and everyone was walking so mechanically.”

“That is correct,” Celestia said. “We fought it after destroying all the other wardens. Each one of them was expanding its territory, putting peytrals on the innocent, and taking many more liberties in controlling the populace. Unopposed, many had their ways. They still helped ensure the survival of their charges, and may have been what taught our ponies how to survive and build after the collapse of the technological era.”

“That’s amazing. Sad, but amazing.” Twilight briefly made a thinking face before asking, “How do you know so much about its systems though? Did you know the designer?”

“You’re looking at her,” Luna said with no trace of pride in body or voice, only a weariness from guilt. “I designed them, came up with the thaumic and electrical circuitry systems, chose the enchantments, and lead the construction of each one. The one we fought was in charge of an area that included what is now the Everfree forest. Our battle back then, once done, turned the area into a thaumic wasteland. Magic did not work correctly, and strange variations of plant and animal life began appearing in the years that followed. Ponies that were brave enough to enter the area often came back violently ill. Celestia and I, thanks to being alicorns, were able to walk out of the zone, find a safe cavern, seal it up with rocks, and sleep for three days after setting the sun and moon to go on their own for a bit.”

“Woah. . .”

“Later on, we taught unicorns how to move the sun and moon while we took a multi-century walk. In hindsight, we really should have seen the superiority complex that would develop ahead of time. It lead to the Three Tribes. After Unification, we took control of the sun and moon back from the unicorns and started rebuilding Equestria.”

Twilight rubbed her chin with a forehoof in thought. “So that’s how that happened.”

Something clicked in my head as a brief memory surfaced. “Wait, wait, wait. I think I remember seeing someone use a power drill while my place was being built once. Where would that have come from?”

“It’s quite simple, Yang,” Pinkie said as she put a foreleg across my shoulders. “The designs come from things uncovered by adventuring authors, like A. K. Yearling, or Daring Do, whichever you prefer.”

“I. . . don’t follow.” The idea of reverse engineering suddenly crossed my mind. “Wait. . . I think I get it now.”

“Luna and I allow our subjects free reign to explore anywhere they want,” Celestia said. “Any disputes that arise from that, we let them work out themselves. Anything that nobody has any claims to is free game. Inevitably, relics from the past will be found. We don’t step in on those finds, nor do we interfere with anything that develops from them. Aside from such actions putting dampers on exploration and discovery, it would also mean that much more paperwork to do and keep track of. All we really do now is organize Equestria’s defenses, maintain peace with other nations, keep the greedy nobles in check-”

“I think I might have done that one accidentally,” I pointed out.

“For which we thank you, Yang. And we also hold court, open to all.”

I didn’t think long before responding. “So, you do nothing, but you also do things.” Only a moment of quietly waving water followed before I spoke again. “Forget it. I just want to relax now.” I spared a sideways glance to Pinkie. “Though I don’t know if that’s possible with her here.”

“Fair enough. Should we start with the shampoo and fur wash or hoof treatment first?”

“If I may,” Twilight said. “I say we start with the shampoo and body wash. While that’s going on, I can explain the nature of Yang’s nails to the attendants, unless she’d rather explain it.”

“Go ahead,” I said. “You could probably explain it better than I can anyways.”

When the ponies for the wash came in, I did my best to explain where they shouldn’t wash me, which simply amounted to the places covered by the bikini and a bit around them. I didn’t want them to touch those more. . . sensitive areas of my body. To my pleasure, the unicorn mare chosen to wash me was very understanding.

We started with my front side, using an unscented soap, just to get it out of the way and because my back would be easier if done last. A good amount of dirt and grime came off with the wash, and I felt much better as well. After turning so my back was available for cleaning, the mare did something unexpected: work in a massage while she was cleaning me. After only a few precise pokes from her hoof to my back, I could already feel myself relaxing even more.

After she was done washing my body and making my muscles feel like jelly, she approached me with a question. “What fragrance would you like in your shampoo?”

I let out a relaxed groan as I got my brain back up and into a low gear. “Oh, do you have strawberry lavender?”

“I’m sorry, but we do not,” the mare apologized.

My utterance of “darn” was rather halfhearted, as I thought about other options. “What about, oh, lavender vanilla?”

“That, we do have.” The mare lit up her horn, floated a lavender and pearl colored bottle over to me, and opened the top. “Does it meet your expectations, Miss Xiao Long?”

I took a deep inhale of the scent of the shampoo. “Oh, that smells good. Use it.”

The mare wasted no time getting to work with the shampoo, quickly working up a lather and gently working it into my hair. After she fully covered my hair with the rather rich suds, she started running a brush through, and apparently was getting a lot of stuff out. Bits of dirt, grass, and stone were all in my hair until she was done, and each bit that she got out made me feel that much cleaner.

The rinse a few minutes later was also very relaxing, with my specification of using very hot water. “Ah, that feels good.” I could almost consider a spa trip with nothing more than a hot waterfall to be good enough, if only the spa sisters back in Ponyville also didn’t give such good massages. “I wonder what a facial feels like? I haven’t had one before.”

“Shall I start on your nails?”

“Sure, sure.” I was too relaxed to move my hands for the mare, but she didn’t seem to mind, moving them as she needed to. Not only did she file my nails down, but she also picked out more debris from under them. “Yang Xiao Long: Unburnable restaurant owner, fighter, and target of petty nobles. Weaknesses: cold temperatures and spa treatments, both debilitating in different ways. Warning: do not damage hair.”

Before I knew it, all twenty of my nails were filed and cleaned. I let out a yawn, which Luna did not miss. “My my, Yang. Falling back asleep already?”

“Spas make me sleepy,” I responded halfheartedly, punctuated by another yawn. “Just get me whatever treatments you get.”

“As you wish~” I could almost hear the playful smirk in Celestia’s voice as I drifted off to sleep.

I was woken up when somepony pushed my head into the pool water. As soon as I was awake, I pushed back, taking a deep gasp for air as soon as I surfaced. “Who did that?”

“I did!” exclaimed Pinkie with a raised hoof. Soon, I reached over to her and pushed her head into the water, releasing her after a few seconds.

“Looks like you were right, sister,” came Celestia’s voice from across the pool. “She slept through everything.”

“Hm?” I turned towards the sisters, wondering what was going on.

“Celestia and I placed bets on whether or not you would wake up during the treatments,” Luna casually explained. “You slept through an hour of pampering. I’m honestly amazed that you slept through being levitated around the place and through the facial treatment.”

“You got me a facial treatment?” I put a hand to my face and felt the skin there. It felt very clean, much more so than when I washed my face on my own. “Feels good.”

“We also got your nails polished to a very nice shine, as we did with our hooves.” When Luna held up a wet and polished hoof, I looked at the nails on my hand and saw that they did have a glossy shine to them. “We got the good stuff. It lasts for a week.”

“We would have gotten you a wing treatment,” Celestia added. “But your lack of wings makes that pretty difficult. Can’t exactly treat something that isn’t there, much as the nobles would disagree.”

“Yeah,” I agreed as I finished examining my nails. “How are they, anyways?”

“Fancy and Fleur are doing quite well. The rest are still focused on ways to get you, and with them so focused on that, we’ve actually been able to get stuff done. Say, would you be willing to join us for another session?”

I held up my hands defensively and backed into the edge of the pool a bit. “I’d really rather not, but thanks for the offer.” A moment later, my curiosity got the better of me and I leaned back in. “What exactly is coming up at the next session?”

“Glad you asked. After a budget evaluation and forecast, there will be a few bills, some from the nobles.”

I gave a mock gasp of surprise. “No!”

“You heard right, Yang,” Luna said. “Some of them have managed to actually get their heads out of their plots over you for a few minutes and write some bills. For example, one of them, from Blueblood, would put a tax on water usage in Los Pegasus and Las Pegasus, the latter of which is in the middle of the desert.”

I blinked owlishly at Luna before Pinkie voiced my thoughts. “What’s Blueblood taking to make him so crazy?”

“Why do you ask, Pinkie?”

“I may be crazy, but I don’t want that kind of crazy! I mean, that would be like taxing a bakery for flour use, or a library for having books, or birds for having feathers! It can be done, but it just wouldn’t be right.”

“I do agree that it is crazy. It would be pointless as well, as our budget is well maintained, so we have a surplus quite often. Anyways, there’s also a proposal to set up a registration system for all carts, wagons, chariots, and carriages, with a tax on transfer of ownership.”

I quickly voiced my opinion. “Too much paperwork.”

“Indeed, it would be,” Celestia agreed. “Plus, it would likely make ponies decide to simply make their own, rendering the whole thing useless.”

Twilight chimed in. “There’s nonsense, there’s Pinkie, then there’s those kinds of ideas. Some days, I just wish I could bring in Applejack, hit them with Honesty and a blabbermouth spell, and get their reasoning. Then I remember it doesn’t work that way.”

I picked up where Twilight left off. “And then you get sad, go have a popsicle, and pass out in the snow.” Splashing and laughter came from three of the mares I was with. Twilight wasn’t part of the laughter. “Sounds like a hit.”

Eventually, the laughter died down. Not long after that came a consensus that it was about time to leave the spa, especially as my clothes and the sisters’ regalia was back and cleaned.

After I got out of the water, I accepted an offer from Celestia for a flash drying spell, which did exactly that. It blasted all the water off of my body and out of my hair and bikini, leaving me completely dry. On the way to the bathroom to change, I passed a hand over the skin on an arm, and noticed just how smooth it was. “That feels really good. I’ll have to see if the spa sisters have a treatment like this.”

I found my combat outfit in the bathroom, cleaned, neatly folded, and tied up with a yellow ribbon, boots off to the side. I picked the bundle of clothes up and was amazed by just how soft it all felt. “These ponies are really good. But, I’m still going to go with my plain clothes.” After taking the bikini off, I started putting my regular clothes on. “If I knew they were going to be that good, I’d have given them everything for cleaning.”

After getting dressed and putting everything away, I came out and noticed that something was different. “Where did Pinkie go?”

“She left about a minute ago,” Twilight helpfully answered. “She’s going back to Ponyville. Said she had to prepare a few ‘sorry you couldn’t enjoy your birthday party because you were being controlled by a meany peytral’ parties. It might help with the rehab they’ll probably need.”

“Ah. That makes sense. So, where are we going now?”

“Unless there are any objections, we will be going to the castle,” Celestia said. “Your room should be ready for you already, and I’m sure you will like it.”

Celestia paid as we left the spa, leaving a generous extra on top of the bill. Outside, we were met by the guards who had escorted us, and we were on our way to the castle in short order.

Along the way, we were stopped by an Earth pony stallion. “Excuse me, your highnesses,” he politely said from the side of the road leading to the castle.

“Yes, Joe?” Luna asked, the guards parting for her.

“I have something for you.” He went inside and soon came out with four pink boxes, differentiated by the white, blue, lavender, and yellow ribbons on them. There was also a card on top.

Luna read the card’s contents out loud. “A little something for the real fighters of the day. Sincerely, Pinkie Pie.”

“Now who can say no to that?” Celestia took the boxes in her magic and gave Joe a few bits. After a friendly farewell, we were back on our way to the castle.

It turned out that the room I got was the same one I had from the Entrepreneur Award Ceremonies. Even though the days were decently warm, it still got cold at night at the castle’s altitude.

After settling in, I decided to start killing time the same way I had before: exercise. After two naps and a quality donut (or two), I had quite a bit of energy to burn off.

Author's Notes:

I believe I have a good explanation here for the schizo tech seen in the show. Unless someone has a better explanation for power drills appearing in the show, this is what I'm sticking to.