Goooood Morning Commonwealth! Traveling Miles with you in the flesh again today, no more recordings I promise! And lemme tell you folks, I'm glad to be back home! Thought I might not make it for awhile there! If you're wondering why, first it's because your faithful DJ is no hero fighting the good fight out there in the wastes to begin with, takin' my life in my hooves every time I stick my nose out of Diamond City, all to bring you up to date with the latest and greatest news and music in the Commonwealth.

Don't get me wrong though, being able to fly makes things a loooot easier on me than a good chunk of my listeners so I'm not complaining. Nope, it's the second thing that has me feelin' so good to be back, and if you're wondering what that is at the edge of your seat, I'm guessing you didn't go to the big party in Goodneighbor did you? Though I bet you saw the lightshow almost anywhere near Trotson...

Now, before some of my zebra fans start freaking out that an evil star fell to the sky, I can tell you that's not the case so calm down. Actually still not quite sure what I saw... but Goodneighbor's still standing, a little worse for wear but still the party capital of the Commonwealth. May want to delay any plans to head that way if you can though, they just went through a war in the streets and are still cleaning up.

That's right, the Kings of Goodneighbor decided to go for the gold, tried to take over the town and got slapped down hard for it! By everypony's favorite dark avenger no less! Well... the Shrouded Stallion had a little help too. The Minutemares and Followers, the mares of Trinity Tower, even the Brotherhood of Friendship all fought in its defense, though I have my doubts that's what the Brotherhood was there for to begin with.

The power armored ponies are still in town too, in some tense negotiations with Mayor Shamrock and even the alicorns who have all decided to gather in town and refuse to leave... Er.. d-don't know why they're so worked up... but I'd advise a friend of mine to keep his head down awhile! We'll bring you updates as we get them, our inside sources assure us we'll know what's up as soon as possible so stay tuned! For now here's a little Sapphire Shores to tide you over...

-----------------------------------------------------

"Just lemme take a look around up here real quick, then we'll move up to the top and hiiiIIIIHOT!"

Smacking my head against the dusty ceiling of the 9th floor of the M.O.M. hub, I glared down at Val hooting laughter and waving her flaming Shishkebab under my hooves, wincing and hugging my singed tail to my chest. Every time I drifted too low, that damn thing was waiting for me and sent me right back up. Already I did not like Val's version of flight training...

"Quit yer cryin' ya big baby! If ya don't like it, quit sinkin' back down every time you open your mouth, keep them legs tucked! Stop tryin' ta walk up there, they ain't doin' nothin'!" Val snickered and swung the flaming sword under me slowly, the flickering flames waving back and forth and shouting like a drill sergeant.

Trying to stay up above the pink slime coated ground below wasn't any easier with the giggling foal on my back, even with a tiny filly as a passenger, it was surprisingly difficult to stay airborne and maintain control with the warm, dense bundle on my back. As bizarrely light on my hooves as I felt, Glitter was a solid lump of earth pony weight that wanted to be in her element, back on the ground. Jade managed to carry me and her around? All the time?

"Keep tryin' daddy! This is fun! I don't wanna walk around in that sludge, giddyup!" She laughed and bounced on my back, delighted at her new ride keeping her up out of the goop that would come up to her belly in places.

The glow of my blue magic surrounded her and I tried to subtly pick her up, instantly smacked upside the head by dark griffon claws. "NO! No horn head cheatin' boss, you stay up with her bein' totally not weightless!"

I groaned and rubbed my head, focusing on controlling my course and staying up. I could do it... I just couldn't talk at the same time, or get distracted thinking, or much of anything except trying very hard to make one shaky flap after another. The ease at which Jade simply fluttered inches above the slime was disgusting... and she didn't have as much room as I did in the hallways... Only made worse by her glancing back occasionally with merriment dancing in her eyes, she thought this was quite fun...

Coughing to disguise a giggle, she nodded and turned around, sitting up in midair and drifting lazily backwards to speak to us, show off... "Valkyrie is correct Fast, muscles build faster when they are pushed, making things easier for yourself will not help you learn faster. What is it you are seeking up here?"

"Not sure... this floor is just really odd with all the slime, hoping to find some kind of explanation... Hard to tell under all this stuff though..." I panted in reply, sticking my head in another slime coated kitchen and trying to puzzle out the vague shapes covered by all the frosting flavored goop.

Zed didn't seem that bothered trudging through the slop below, though to a zebra that regularly soaked his hooves in blood and bone fighting hoof to hoof, the sticky sweet slime probably wasn't that bad. As I watched and nearly ran into a wall for my trouble, he lightly stepped over one of the slime coated zombie corpses and raised an eyebrow.

"You came up here and did all this while we slept? Impressive..." He blinked in confusion at Jade, Glitter and Val all wheeling on him with a shared, angry huff, cautiously continuing his thought under their glare. "Not that it was wise... just impressive. I hope you got it out of your system?"

"Er... y-yeah... It was a really stupid thing to do, I umm... w-was just trying to get used to... things..."

Carefully avoiding the kitchen I had been caught seriously considering lopping off a limb in, I squeaked at Val viciously pinching my flank with a grumble. "Bet yer ass it was stupid boss... cain't guard ya if you keep wandering off! Lucky Blue spoke up for ya, thought ya might need a few more good punches ta the face 'fore she set me straight... You uh... doin' ok now?"

"Fine now... just... trying to take my time and get used to.... yeeeeEEEOWWW!! STOP THAT!" Ugh... mouth started working, wings stopped... wincing at the flames dancing under my hooves, I shot up and bashed my head on the doorframe of the next kitchen down as the fiery griffon just snickered.

This was a larger kitchen, but so covered in slime I couldn't make anything out, just indistinct blobs of frosting smelling sludge all over the place. Maybe I could find a firehose or something on the walls and...

"This is intolerable... we will never find anything like this, one moment Fast." Jade huffed primly and her long horn lit up, the pale bluish-white glow spreading to all the pink in here and lifting it all up into the air, swirling together into a dripping ball revealing all the counters and equipment in here under it.

"Wow mommy! That's awesome!" Glitter squealed from my back, looking all around in wonder and throwing me off to go lurching towards the sunny yellow cabinets on the wall.

With her cheeks glowing pink at the praise, Jade smiled and flung the ball of goop to a mostly empty corner, letting me get a good look around as she replied. "Thank you dear, not Celestia-tier telekinesis by any means, but more than sufficient. It is nice to be appreciated."

"And you are totally, one hundred thousand percent appreciated Jade, thank you. Alright... that's enough of this, I can't do anything up here and the floor's clean sweetie, off you go." Landing was still more of a controlled crash or falling gracefully at this point, but I didn't dump the filly to the ground and thumped down to my rump, letting her slide to the floor with a whine.

Ahh... ground... nice, familiar ground... Now that I was back on firmer footing, I could head right for what had caught my interest, a towering contraption in the corner looking oddly like a soda fountain. A monstrosity of pink and chrome, a trio of big taps and spigots and was still stained pink and a lot of cracked bowls and plastic trays nearby. From how things looked before Jade's impromptu spring cleaning, that was where all this sludge in here came from.

Pulling on one of the handles experimentally rewarded me with a clattering, chugging noise before an explosion of pink slime spattered out of the tap. Wiping it off my muzzle in annoyance over Glitter's laughs, I scowled at the machine and looked up to the flickering sign emblazoned across the top; "Fluffer Batter", a cartoon picture of Pinkie Pie's face was all big blue eyes and wide smile, slightly darker pink spattered all over her muzzle like she had been making a pig of herself on the slop.

Val grimaced, staring up at it quizzically. "...Food? That stuff actually food boss?"

"It smells like it Auntie Val! Like frosting! I bet it..." Glitter called happily and stretched up to wipe some of the gunk from the machine, bringing to her muzzle and sticking a tongue out to...

"NO! Do NOT eat that!" My burning eyes must have flared to life in fear, falling over myself to smack her hoof away shakily and instantly sorry from her shimmering stare.

She sniffled a second, holding her swatted foreleg to her chest, looking up at me with wounded pink eyes and stalking off, grumbling over her shoulder. "I was just kiddin'... I-I'm not a dumb baby dad..."

"Sorry! Sorry sweetie, I know you're not, I'm just... a little overprotective right now ok? How about you help Val look around? I want to take this thing apart real quick, it'll be boring..."

I didn't mean to... It was just dangerous and I got scared, still freaked out by her being foalnapped and nearly becoming street pizza. Maybe this stuff wasn't poisonous for me anymore, but that didn't mean I didn't have to consider those kinds of things for her just because I was... different...

That actually made me more protective of her, she was still a healthy, normal filly, a plain old pony... That suddenly seemed a fragile and precious thing, I had to do all I could to safeguard that.

A tearing sound from one of the refrigerators in here being tugged open was followed by her happy squeal, so she got over it at least. Bottles of Sparkle Cola of an amazing number of varieties were flung out behind her as she rooted around, the rainbow colored Sparkle Cola Crash (made with real zap apples!) caught my eye and I floated it over while she kept digging.

Floating out my tools to the weird vending machine I took a tingly sip and smacked my lips, that was pretty good! A robust tickle of radiation with just a tinge of electricity sparking on my tongue, no good for her with the way my pip-buck chattered, but Jade would probably like that too. I distractedly noticed my rainbow colored rad meter hung right in the middle of the dial between yellow and orange, I vaguely remembered marking it reaching the red after my toxic bath in the Combat Zone, but it had gone down on its own and stayed right there...

Panels started popping loose off the pink machine under my darting screwdriver and I glanced back to Glitter's happy gasp at the next fridge down, pulling her head out with a plastic box holding half a dozen amazingly perfect looking chocolate cupcakes with little pink, blue and yellow sprinkles, shaped like... balloons?

"Can I eat this dad? It looks reeeeeally good! No pink stuff!" She pleaded beside me, prancing on her hooves and holding the box up under my snout.

I stared closely at them, waiting for the frosted tops to flip open into fanged mouths or something... Nothing, just cupcakes, admittedly they did indeed look 'reeeeally good'... The faded sticky note decided me and I opened it in my magic, floating one out and nibbling at it as I reread the cartoonish, looping script and the different, black marker scrawled below it.

P.P.'s Super Duper Chocolatey Decadence Cupcakes Supreme! -- Hooves OFF! Saved for Director's B'Day!

My eyes closed in complete bliss and my unattended tools clattered to the floor as I took a much bigger bite, munching happily and nodding to the filly. There was only one 'P.P.' in all of Equestria that could make something so mind-numbingly delicious... I didn't think Ministry Mare Pinkie Pie was even capable of making dangerous sweets... magically impervious to time maybe, but not dangerous...

"Mmmmnnn Mmggoo Nnhead Sweetie... Sooooo good..." I groaned and tried to keep from just swallowing what was left whole, wiping the drool from my muzzle and following the box as she pulled it away jealously, instantly reaching in and grabbing one to join me in the greatest of wasteland delicacies.

Neither of us really wanted to, eyeing those four remaining cupcakes with avarice... but we nodded to each other with stuffed cheeks and she trotted reluctantly out to give everyone else one while I worked. That left one lonely old cupcake... We both kept darting glances at it as the others joined us, even Zed impressed and savoring the treat.

"W-We should save it..." Glitter whined, staring at the last soldier longingly.

Licking my hoof, I bobbed my head in agreement and kept right on drooling at it in her hooves. "We should... or split it..."

"We could... hey! No fair!" Her next idea was interrupted by the alicorn beside her, gently floating the package away and hovering it above the foal's reach as she pranced away playfully

"You are clearly not to be trusted with such a delightful treasure... I will hold onto it." Jade admonished us both smartly, but I caught that tongue flicking out to sweep up an errant bit of frosting on her nose and the little shiver she gave.

Well, whether I actually had to eat or not, knowing I could still enjoy doing it was nice. Chuckling at the little filly repeatedly jumping up for the floating box that kept bobbing just out of her reach, I turned back to the strange vending machine and went back to work. A shocked scream made me bash my head on the underside of the drip tray and flop around trying to turn, with my wings unhelpfully 'helping'.

Jade had danced away to where she flung all the slime in here and had stepped... no... was being grabbed by the sludge!? A dripping hoof had reached out from the pile and grabbed her leg, an amorphous zombie head was pushing from the ball of goop and snapping at her, then another... more legs stretched out and dragged the ball forward as she tugged away, Glitter trying to help yank her free of...

Flopping close to upright finally, I scrambled that way and drew Vengeance, using S.A.T.S. to be very careful shooting with them so near and target the head... heads... of the pink abomination... more were pushing out? The silver revolver boomed and two slimy zombie heads were vaporized, but more kept pushing up!

This was impossible, I cleared this floor already! Maybe they weren't all headshots, but E.F.S. had been clear dammit! Trying to push aside this fresh madness, I sent Best Served flying across the room, arcing down and slicing through the slimy limbs holding Jade's slender foreleg, they parted like hot butter, but I could see them sealing back together again as she tugged herself free. What the actual fuck!?

FZZZATTT!!

The ball of sludge screeched and glowed brightly before popping into a cloud of ash, a shaking Glitter gripping Righteous Authority in her mouth and panting lightly, rushing to hug her mother and giving me a frightened yet smug snort. "T-Told ya... n-not a baby...."

I'd take more of a moment to agree and congratulate her for her quick thinking, but for the shuffling, slurping sounds drifting down the halls. More of them? Shit... These zombies were more persistent, I ran to the door and spotted several clumps of slime inching their way across the floor, smooshing together back into pony shapes again with snarling moans.

Were they getting more active since we had breached the hub? Jade said zombies would eventually go dormant and still if nothing alive was near, they had certainly surprised me enough already, blending in with all the corpses littering the Commonwealth. If these were waking up and all doing this...

Val shoved past me and opened up with her repaired M.E.W., laying down blazing lines of red death at anything that moved and incinerating more clumps into ash as she grinned back at me. "Lil' tougher than normal huh boss!? Don't worry, fire fixes everything!"

Jade had run up beside us, staring out the door in fascination before grabbing everything in her telekinesis again and drawing it all together into one big target for Val to scorch. "They are reconstituting themselves... I have never seen zombies behave in such a way, almost like Canterlot ghouls or...."

Glitter came up right behind her and started firing pink beams out to join Val's red ones as she thought, trying to follow the griffon out to...

"WAIT!"

The pale filly pouted back over her shoulder at me, arching an impatient eyebrow and just waiting for me to yelp about keeping her out of danger... "Er... S-Stay with Jade sweetie, let her pick them up like that and you fry them for her ok?"

Phew, that cut off that annoyed look anyway and she smiled broadly around the boxy weapon in her mouth, bobbing her head rapidly and scrambling her way up Jade's back. "Ok daddy! Keep workin' on your borin' stuff! We'll get this!"

At least my rampage up on this floor meant they were all still reforming apparently, it should be fairly safe... None of my weapons seemed effective, though my lightning spell cooked them well enough last night. As long as it was just putting them down before they got up again, it wasn't too much to ask to let her go with Jade, she'd be safe behind her shield if it came to it right?

Zed was in a worse position than I was, hooves versus blobs that just reformed wasn't a good match so he kept an eye out at the door while I increased the pace. If they were all like this.... the ones below would be doing the same thing, and any above we cleared would have to be properly finished off or it would just keep happening.

"Your daughter is dealing with her ordeal in her own way as well I think. Most children in the wastes learn to fight even younger than her, you cannot protect her from everything..." Zed spoke sagely while I worked, just what I wanted... parenting advice from a grumpy zebra bachelor...

"Most kids aren't mine..."

That got a gruff chuckle of a reply, "No, but all children grow up. Have you considered how she feels? Being the helpless damsel in distress, rescued by a father who made it clear he would die to do it? The same with your mare in Hexington, your rescues tend to lean towards throwing yourself headlong towards danger and death, without concern for yourself. That is a hefty weight on small shoulders."

Grunting a noncommital answer and trying to ignore the valid point, I kept working. I needed to know... had to be sure, try to understand before moving on. What had been idle curiosity before was now an imperative, this was not right at all. With a final screw and a squalling of rusty metal, I finally yanked the biggest panel off the machine and spun it in my magic, finding strange internals I had to inspect, but also exactly what I expected...

Etched right into the metal was the image of a spread eagle pony... The Institute... of course...

"At least one of these things on every floor? I know we're helping out, the whole joint M.O.M. / M.O.P. project with the school, but really? Leaving feedback as requested from on high, but the Ministry of Morale makes much better stuff than this... goop... I don't care we're just helping Ministry Mare Pie fiddle with the taste, I'm sticking with the real cakes thank you. Can't believe they're already testing them in schools of all places! It doesn't really taste ...bad... per se, but I'm not the only one wondering about those kooks from C.I.A.T. Hear rumors from upstairs, ongoing investigations..."

The stressed voice in my ear from so long ago didn't make me feel much better about digging up the old audio file, there was worry in that voice from somepony who didn't trust the Institute at all, and with good reason... Other than that I hadn't found much to go on besides basic surveys on the taste of 'Fluffer Batter' and how to improve it.

The guts of the dispensing machine wasn't much more informative either. Vats of slime inside were still full, actually overflowing even after all this time. The weird talisman array hooked into them was even more confusing, amplification talismans were used to increase the potency of other spell effects, not directly wired into the strange setup I had found. I was still puzzling over it as we rose higher and higher up the Ministry of Morale hub, obsessed with some new experiment of the Institute.

"Don't wanna keep goin' a floor atta time boss? Might be passin' up some good loot here..." Val watched the pink numbers of the elevator lighting up above her one after another, wincing at each floor and the potential treasures we were rising above.

"I'm sure Val, we can see about going back down later. Right now, the best option is probably the top. If we can get to the maneframe running this place we can take our time and do whatever you want after its under our control. We need to see what's going on outside too..."

Shoving me playfully, her long tail flicked out and tickled my flanks, getting a yelp and a large pair of black wings flapping out and smacking everyone crammed into the small elevator. "Gots a good idea whats goin' on out there already right? Them fillies ain't gonna give it up boss..."

"Give up what? Why'd they all freak out when they saw you dad?" Glitter piped up, causing Jade and I to turn matching shades of red while the griffon hedged, scratching her plumage mysteriously down to her.

"N-Nothing you need worry about dear, grown pony problems, all very boring..." Jade sputtered and tried to ignore the curious stare she got, grateful as I was when the doors dinged at the 20th floor and we stuck our heads out.

A police station? No... it reminded me of one though, quite a bit like the Manebridge Police H.Q. Paladin Dance and Scribe Wind were staying at. Lots of office space, big bullpens and cubicles large enough to barely fit under the name, glass walls and dividers spattered with pink glop here and there, but nowhere near the level of sludge as the 9th floor.

We were still short of the top of the M.O.M. hub, but this was as far as the elevator could take us, we'd have to figure out where to go from here. My ears stood up straight and flicked around us, picking up the shuffles and shambles of more zombies inside before I spotted the first lurching up from the floors.

Making sure Glitter stayed with Jade at the elevator, I took a flapping canter out into the open lobby and drew my weapons, Val and Zed joining me and setting to our grim work. If we had to deal with the whole tower at once, this would be impossible. As it was, killing off a floor of zombies at a time wasn't easy, but doable after a lot of hard won experience and teamwork.

Though Val had to let Zed borrow her Shishkebab to more permanently dispatch them, and Glitter happily ran out to scorch corpses as they fell into piles of ash that wouldn't get back up. At least my lightning spell worked, cooking them into cracked and smoking dark pink forms that fell and crumbled to the floor.

Surprisingly, I didn't feel a significant drain of magic every time I used the spell, though I spotted my rainbow colored radiation gauge dipping slightly down into the yellow/green border. Was I still charged up with rads? Could I use it for magic like this? Suddenly the little needle seemed less like a warning of sickness and death, and more like a fuel gauge...

I also didn't get knocked flying back at each thunderous blast... So long as I was on the ground, I actually stayed put somehow, that was new... Unleashing a final blast to scorch the last bits of red on E.F.S. I flinched back but still stayed right where I was, staring at my hooves in surprise.

Jade seemed to figure out what I was thinking, glancing around the offices before trotting around me in a circle, staring down with interest. "Earth pony strength... curious... I believe you will find that spell easier to use now Fast, provided you are in contact with the earth. I suppose Moondancer was able to solve some of the problems with the I.M.P. after all, you may have access to all three branches of ponykind's magic..."

Ugh... she found it fascinating while every new little surprise kept messing with me, making me feel like a stranger in my own skin. Glitter's happy yell helped me buck up a little though, prancing around and stamping her hooves in front of me, standing straight and puffing her little chest out, leaning forward against an invisible wind. "Like me!! Look daddy, stand like this when ya do it! Aww... but does this mean I'm not stronger than you no more?"

Shaking off the nagging panic of adjusting to what I was now, I shook my head and ruffled her mane. "I doubt it, you actually are an earth pony sweetie, I'm... something else... Besides, you're still growing up! You'll be taller and stronger than me in no time..."

That made her happy at least, her pale cheeks brightening as I trudged off. That had just brought up another little wrinkle I hadn't considered yet... Jade said her kind lived a long, looooong time... I wanted to see Glitter grow up into a healthy, happy mare, maybe even have grandkids someday... but would I have to watch her get old too? Die? See her own foals grow up and die after her? Val and Zed too... even my family and friends from the Stable if I found them... every non ghoul or alicorn I had ever met... How long would I have to just keep going as time claimed everyone else around me? Would I even age anymore?

Biting my tongue brought tears to my eyes, but gave me something else to focus on and shake those thoughts off. I didn't want to think about that, couldn't face the thought of everyone else... No. Not going there. Not at all... B-Besides... I'd probably get myself killed at some point right?

Thankfully, this floor gave me interesting things to distract myself with. I stepped into one of the partitioned bullpens and looked around at all the slime spattered whiteboards and corkboards, maps and pictures still hanging from them, files and terminals waiting to be cracked... The big map of the Commonwealth on one wall was focused on a town to the northeast, several pins and circles all around it and down the coast.

Reading it even from several feet away, the name Neighlem was familiar, the snowglobe I found for Glitter... 'Historic Neighlem Village'... Why were they investigating...

"Zebras." Zed spoke right beside me, sending me up to the ceiling in a surprised leap that set my wings flapping reflexively.

"W-What?!"

"They were investigating zebras, Neighlem had a population of my kind before the war, it eventually became a detention camp... They... FAST! Open these terminals for me, please!" He spoke somberly looking at all the papers and pictures pinned up in here, his grey eyes hanging on one and widening as he excitedly yelled and pointed at...

A piece of black glass? A black and white picture of a jagged shard of glass, no... mirror... Squiggly runes etched at the curved edge and a series of numbers, evidence lot numbers... "R-Right! Hang on just a second Zed..."

Patching and cracking every working terminal in this office area while Val kept wandering about, stabbing chunks of slime with her Shishkebab, I looked up and ran a search for the numbers listed, able to read them even this far away. Zed was practically dancing on his hooves beside me, reading over my shoulder as I dug up the most relevant files.

Evidence ID# 892320
Zebra Artifact #867
Forwarded to C.I.A.T. Reverse Engineering Division

Notes: Confiscated from Neighlem detainees. Don't know why Dr. Swirl wanted it, just glad it's gone. Creepy...

"Sorry Zed... not here..." I winced as the zebra stamped and snorted, bucking a rotting desk across the office with a crash.

Mastering himself after just a moment, Zed nodded and spoke through gritted teeth, watching a picture of the Four Stars station outside drift through the air. "Thank you... I hoped... It is alright, I will continue investigating here a moment, as you can guess this is of interest to me. I promise to tell you more when we have more time to speak."

Oooookie dokie lokie... I backed away and left him to it, whatever he wanted to know, I opened all the terminals so he was free to work at it a minute. The rest of this floor held other areas to investigate. This was the non-party side of the Ministry of Morale, the Pinks... Working to defend Equestria from wartime espionage and hidden threats.

Another bullpen area seemed focused almost entirely on the coast, a few familiar newspaper clippings about the Winter Gang caught my eye, especially the one listing Nick Hearts n' Hooves' shooting. Drug smugglers? That's the gist I got, lots of shore side buildings marked for raids, lists of confiscated drugs and frustrated notes about their efforts being stymied from above.

A third small office area tucked away and almost forgotten in the corner was the jackpot though, pictures of the C.I.A.T. campus and the Division heads of the Institute stared back at me from the cluttered, cramped walls. A lone desk and glowing terminal was nearly buried under all the papers and notes, a skeleton sitting at the desk with a 10mm pistol before it.

Pushing the long dead Nelly Mess by her nameplate away from the desk carefully, I shakily patched my pip-buck to her terminal, my mouth was suddenly dry, glancing around at all the information she had compiled here.

C.I.A.T. Investigation - Case File #49

This is ridiculous!! I keep trying to tell my superiors and they keep shoving me aside! Those ponies at that school are crazy! The things they're doing, that they keep getting away with... All I hear is blah, blah, blah, war effort! Like it's ok to do anything so long as we win! I'm a loyal Equestrian and don't have any love for the stripes, whatever we do to stop them is fine, sure... but against our own?!

C.I.A.T. Investigation - Case File #54

Stuffed in the 'let it die already' corner! Like I'm some stubborn little filly that's just being silly!? And I swear to Celestia, they know... know about the investigation, taking steps to make sure I'm ignored and keep the ponies up top happy... Thought I made a breakthrough weeks back and they just 'happened' to finish up those Memory Recliners, lots of nice excuses about how they had to test them out to get them working right, who cares if a few criminals ended up brain dead?!

Now Ministry Mare Pie comes in for one of her visits, and they just so happen to have all these new toys for her to play with? Yeah, I'm sure they just want to help the Ministry of Peace make sure all the hungry get fed... Fluttershy's followers may actually be worried about food shortages, but those nuts aren't... I ain't eating that crap, nothing that comes from that school is to be trusted, I'm going to nail those bastards one way or another, then they'll all see!

C.I.A.T. Investigation - Case File #61

Being followed... watched... I know why, if it weren't for my insider I'd never know half of what I've found out, they want to know who it is... plug the leak... Not gonna happen, know better than to trust anything to terminals or physical records, even my memories can't be trusted... Only real patriot there actually worried about the things they're getting up to, even if he's a little ...off... Not going to let him get caught though...

C.I.A.T. Investigation - Case File #67

Overheard some grumbling from the narcotics bullpen, little flirting got Hooper to spill a little... New kinds of those zebra drugs coming in from the coast, new flavors... Rumors been rampant about the Ministry Mare's little habit, they paying her off to keep out of their business? Or just trying to help keep her distracted?

She's coming back in a few weeks, more of those tests and work at the Switchboard... Pinkie Sense research... like everything they get up to, it could be used to help Equestria, but I don't trust them... Going to try going to the M.O.P., if my superiors here won't listen, then I'll go where the safety of ponies comes first, then M.A.S., M.W.T., M.O.I., hell even the Ministry of Awesome if I have to, they could actually try doing something for once...

Straight to Princess Luna if that's what it takes, this can't go on...

C.I.A.T. Investigation - Case File #70

It happened... it finally happened and now we're trapped. Tried to tell them, experimental maneframe running the place and shields keeping it standing, both little gifts from the Commonwealth Institute of Arcane Technology... Super shield is great except for the whole letting you die from radiation thing, the computer won't open the building either, we're dead...

Being proved right should feel better, but it doesn't... Glad I never ate that gunk at least, rads are having some kind of effect on it, Arbor Hoof started spewing pink and had a seizure, others look like they're sweating the stuff... Not waiting around for that or the rads to kill me, ending this now.

I stared at that final message and back to the skeleton beside me, feeling a sense of kinship with the mare trying to convince her superiors about the things the Institute was up to under their noses. She tried and at least she died on her own terms, not made into one more experiment... like I had been.

I downloaded everything... Every scrap of data in the terminal, every push pinned photo and slip of paper from the walls, all of it. Her work shouldn't go to waste like this. It might be a little late, but I promised to make use of it, take up her failed investigation and put a stop to the crazy scientists somehow. A dozen new map markers sprang up after the information was downloaded, more places to look into, more clues. Deeper down the rabbit hole.

Val's squawk from across the floor revealed a larger and fancier elevator leading further up the hub, time to find this stupid computer and figure out what to do...

Just when all the pink was getting to me, we found a floor even more garish somehow... Bright yellow with darker spots, more of the ever present pink glop flung over the... cheese? That's what it looked like, every wall was painted to look like bright yellow swiss cheese...

The carpets were a darker, yellow-orange cheddary color, each wedge shaped, dirty cheese desk topped with wooden slaps of 'bread', the stools round, padded wheels of faux cheese before each... Somepony really liked cheese, like... a lot...

The horde of slime zombies up here was the worst yet as well, numerous and many of them wearing dripping pink barding like the guards of Goodneighbor, so many I had to fall back on my less effective weaponry just to buy breathing room. We didn't have enough that could put these things down for good.

Worse yet the ones that fell from bullets and shotgun shells started immediately oozing together in some horrific amalgam. A lurching blob of snapping mouths and reaching hooves, spikes of horns and wings jutting out crazily, bulldozing its way through the floor after us and absorbing every other zombie it rolled over. Of just fantastic! They could do this too!?!

The thing stretched and sent a ropy trunk of gunk out, smashing more of the odd desks under it at me and sending me flapping frantically up and away. Val screeched from my left and I caught the sight of it flinging out a ball of sludge at her, plastering her against the nearest wall before swinging at me with that club like mass again, now spiked with splinters and shrapnel from its progress.

Zed dodged nimbly back from its attempts to grab him, swinging the flaming sword in his mouth and hacking off flaming chunks but overwhelmed by the mass of slime. The spiked maul of its limb swung at me again, this time smashing into my side and flinging me from the air and through a wall, splinters of yellow wood jutting from my flank.

Glitter's shrill yell got me up and airborne again before I had time to screw it up by thinking at least, a wall of sludge oozing around Jade's blue shield protecting them both. Alright dammit, this thing wanted to make itself one big target, fine...

KRAKA-THOOM!!

I poured a lot of juice into that attack, more than I'd normal try with my old magic reserves... Inadvisably from mid air too, so I was sent careening back asshole over teakettle to bash into the wall I had already sailed through once. The crackling web of lightning cooked the monstrous thing though, that stretched out limb crumbled under its own weight as I dragged myself up again, idly noticing my rad meter had dipped all the way down to green now.

Val groaned and shook herself, spattering everything nearby in the sludge she was soaked in, her feathers a sopping mess... ugh... my feathers were too... wonderful. How did you even clean these things? "Blegh!! Nasty! Good job boss, flap harder when ya do that though, ya look silly tossin' yerself back like that, least you don't use heavy weapons. Though now that yer airborne..."

Cutting off that appraising grin of hers, I yanked the biggest chunks out of my flank and stumbled around, sighing in relief at Jade's healing magic. Lots of desks and big offices, conference rooms and glowing terminals... aha, there was the biggest, fanciest door in here, across the lobby area and behind a half wheel of cheesy receptionist desk.

"Nope, no big guns or battle saddles, don't even start Val... Here, need your expert skills here if you could?" I shuddered at her just rubbing her claws together in thought, dreading whatever ideas she had for my changes.

At least Val was taking all this well, positively giddy with her regimen of training and torture she was muttering about while her dark claws went to work, finally popping the ornate brass lock with a curse and sucking on her thumbclaw with a hiss. "Jeez... If they wanted it locked that much, why not use one of the fancy computer ones? All yours boss, what'd we win?!"

Peeking in the huge, opulent office inside, I wasn't sure how to answer... Her joke seemed oddly appropriate, it looked like we had indeed won something...

The dusty but slime free room was odd, pictures covered the walls along with banners and streamers, crepe paper strung from corner to corner and greasy old balloons absolutely filling the cheese themed room. A tall tower of marzipan cake under glass and a big black box with a silver bow sat atop the breadloaf shaped desk.

The skeleton sitting in the cushy chair was tall, wearing ratty yellow rags and a flat, broad cowpony hat of dark brown, a rotting accordion stretched from their lap down to the floor. What looked like a flare gun was near one outstretched bony hoof on the desk, the cheery blue weapon looked like it had blown the back of his head off, in a spray of blackened blood and... confetti?

It was the banner hanging over the desk that was screwing with me though... Black and silver, the monocrome logo of the Shrouded Stallion comics printed at one end, the very type of decoration I had asked for at my last birthday out in the old world. The other end had a logo that looked a bit like the M.A.S. symbol, or one of the goddesses' crests maybe... outstretched wings with a horn pointing straight up between them. The words they framed were even stranger and I sat with a thump reading it, the others silently joining me and doing the same.

What. the. fuck?

I kept reading it, it kept being there... like it had for the last 200 years... waiting... Noooo... it couldn't be...

Managing to stand on trembling legs, I crept forward and stretched a tentative hoof out to the big, shiny present... That's what it was, a present, a present wrapped in my own colors...

Barely brushing the silver ribbon made the whole top of the box explode off in a shower of confetti, sending me scrambling back to the others waiting for the pain and kaboom, instead opening one eye and twitching an ear up at the crackling recording that started playing.

"HAHA! It worked! I'm guessing it worked anyway, whoever's hearing this is in need of a very special party, my cheesy sense is never wrong! Never had a chance for a Rebirthascension-Day party, read about it bein' possible in old forgotten scrolls of party lore, but never thought I'd see it, course guess I still haven't! Got a funny tickle a long time ago from Ponyville, but it went away, like a party was supposed to happen, but didn't...

Oh well! I'm totally sure on this one! Feels a reeeeeally long way away though, and don't think I'm gonna be around for it, soooooo... just have to do all the planning and hope you make it! Tried to help plan a going away to jail party for some very bad ponies here in the Commonwealth too, just have to leave it up to you I guess, yup! I'm sure it'll all be sunshine and rainbows, Pinkie told me so!

Gonna miss my little party planner buddy, but she'll wind up in a good home right? Sorry I don't have anything better for you, though I can give you a helping hoof here and there, even if you don't like one of your other presents, you should love the others. Hit it Boneless!"

At the yell and click of the recording ending, I spun on the wall suddenly sliding up on one side of the room, a portrait of an absolutely huge party on the wall depicted a young Pinkie Pie and a gangly orange buck with a frizzy brown mane, their legs slung around each others shoulders.

The small room behind it held a computer that made me drool, the cutting edge of Equestrian computer technology, I could only do better by finding one of three Crusader Maneframes miraculously still functioning somewhere, not bloody likely. Bizarrely, this tower of yellow steel and blinking lights was wired into ...a rubber chicken?

Was stamped on a copper plate under the floppy yellow rubber chicken in its glass case, somehow yes... they had wired this utterly ridiculous object directly into the maneframe, and it seemed to have a function of some kind... It didn't make the least bit of logical sense, but there it was, the red eye of the camera beside it whirring and looking me over, the smooth hum of the machine deepening as it brightened up and a monitor blinked to life.

WELCOME GUEST...
PREPARING TO TRANSFER AUTHORIZATION...
PLEASE STEP FORWARD, ATTACH EXTERNAL DEVICE AND ACKNOWLEDGE

BEGIN TRANSFER? --- Y/N?

Flickered back at me, lit in yellow text instead of the standard green. I gaped trying to make some kind of sense of this, floating my pip-buck's patch cable to the waiting port cautiously.

"Fast? Is it safe to do that?" Jade glanced around the ceiling, waiting for turrets to drop down, robots to come screaming from the walls, some fresh wasteland horror, instead there was nothing but the waiting prompt.

"I think it's waiting for us... I know it's impossible, but you see the banner, heard the recording... It's been waiting all this time for exactly this." I accepted the command and waited, wincing at the thrum of the machine getting to work and my eyes slowly widening at the wall of text zipping past them.

Val didn't sound like she trusted any of this at all, deeply suspicious and snorting, "How in the name of Gawd could that be true boss? Waitin' around 200 years fer us to just come strollin' in?! How!?"

"B-Because Pinkie Pie... that's how..."

The Ministry Mare's antics were often met with that excuse, I could remember frustratingly getting it more than once asking how she did some of the things she did on tv; defying gravity, using her mane or tail like prehensile limbs, pulling objects out of nowhere... I even once heard all saddlebags in Equestria had attained their incredible storage capacities from spells based on just that last little skill.

None of those things compared to feeling it really hit home personally though, the Mare of this Ministry just did not entirely obey the rules of reality like the rest of us, it made a nonsense kind of sense the director of her Trotson Hub didn't either... I didn't know how, wasn't sure I could know how, but whatever the reason this Director... Cheese Sandwich by the nameplate on his desk, had just given me control over the entire Ministry of Morale hub... Just like that...

Blinking at all the menus and controls now available to me, I detached my pip-buck for a moment and stumbled back to the desk in confusion, looking up to the black and silver marzipan cake and the matching present. Glitter scrambled up to the dusty wooden desk eyeing the cake hungrily, glancing back to see what was in the box with me.

A hat? A big, floppy, stylish, red mare's hat... why? I floated the bit of clothing out and gasped at the small pink object it concealed, glowing with its own internal light. A familiar pink filly caught in mid bounce, her fluffy, darker pink mane and tail, bright blue eyes clear and a beaming, honest grin... I floated up the tiny statue to read the inscription at the base, feeling the tingle and surge of energy as the voices of the others rose up in a happy chorus, reunited with another of their fellows.

Awareness! It was under E!

Of course it didn't match the others... The tickle of magic made me giggle despite myself, the taste and smell of pies and cakes filling my senses, my eyes and ears seemed to sharpen even more than they just recently had, but it was suddenly less overwhelming... Clear.

I was so taken with looking over the tiny shard of soul, I had to shake it off to notice Glitter rooting around in the empty box. Not entirely empty it seemed... what I took for wrapping to protect the invulnerable statue was... a dress? Why in the world would a mare's dress and hat be stuck in here too? The statue was plenty, I tucked it away with the others happily, enjoying the song of four of them in my head.

I floated the garment up to Jade, but it was far too small. Too big for Glitter too, it was for a petite adult... actually it looked... Nah... couldn't be... Maybe whatever prognostication let Director Cheese see me coming wasn't completely accurate... he didn't seem entirely sure who I'd be, just that I'd be there...

I bundled it up and stuffed it back in the box for now, pulling the flat brown hat from the skeleton's head and shoving it down on Glitter's head. Floating the body up in my magic, I tugged the banners down and wrapped him up, he was a friend of Pinkie, he deserved a real rest too.

With his chair vacated, I walked around and sat in it myself, still soft and springy after all this time in the sealed environment of the tower. The glowing yellow terminal on the desk would let me access the rest of the systems in this place, with my new access... Time to get to work.

By the time I got through everything, it was already afternoon and the others were bored to tears. Giving Val the location of the evidence lockup a few floors below gave her something to occupy herself with at least, once I convinced the security system to target the slimy undead on every floor as something other than deceased targets, I felt pretty good about her safety and she was happy.

Zed had gone with her as well, his investigations downstairs must have given him a few things to go looking for down there too. That left Jade, Glitter and I sitting in the still clean office together, the filly's belly full to bursting from all the cake and groaning as Jade nickered at her. "I told you... Nopony can eat that much cake Glitter, let your bellyache be a lesson to you."

"Nnnnnn.... f-fix it... please mommy?" She whined and drummed her hooves weakly in reply, I noticed she didn't have to do nearly as much convincing as I did to get her to fix my hangover... The alicorn medic's horn lit up and she gave a rueful grin, easing the foal's moans slightly while I finished up.

The B.N.L.S. Maneframe gave me access to every camera in Goodneighbor, a loooot more than probably even Shamrock knew about... From that I had been able to get a look around outside and figure out the basics of what was going on, now that we had time to think and talk about it, it was time to start reaching out and getting out of here.

Ok... Shamrock first, I flicked over to the camera in his Casino Managers office, finding a tired and frazzled looking ghoul sprawled on his ratty couch, crunching Mint-als like they really were candy and muttering, his griffon guard Scarlet nearby. I coughed for attention and had to smile at him jumping straight up in surprise, scrambling in midair and looking all around for the voice speaking to him.

"Hi Mayor Shamrock, sorry to leave you hanging, how's it going?"

"F-Fast!? What the hell?! Where are you? Did it work?! Why'd you run off and hide up there you lunatic! Do you know how dangerous it is up there, there are zombies that..." He shouted and spun around, trying to find something to focus on.

"Yeah, we figured that out. You could have told me about that little surprise before I opened the place Shamrock..."

I watched the ghoul on the monitor carefully, he knew but didn't say... I wanted to know why. "Well I didn't think I'd have to dammit! Thought we were going up together, had a security detail outfitted with flamers and M.E.W.s! You all alright? Those things are... pretty nasty, even to a ghoul like me."

That was a good response... He was at least concerned and had planned for it, I had kind of not let him in on not entirely trusting him... "Ok, we're all alright. I'm in charge of the hub now Shamrock, can do anything you want with it. But I have my own problems as you probably noticed, how's it going down there?"

"Oh fantastic! Just cleaning up from a war and dealing with two armies that won't leave! Look Fast, you're putting me in an awkward position here... I have two new allies that want different things, if I don't find a way to let those mares in or get you out, they are going to absolutely loose their shit! What am I supposed to tell them huh? I don't want to give you up, but it's not like they want to hurt you... couldn't you just come on out? Sounds like a lotta fun!" Shamrock grinned and waggled his rotted eyebrows lewdly, well... I could see things from his perspective.

"No. I'm sorry to put you in the middle Shamrock, but I'm not doing that. It's not fair to put you and your town in this position, the only fair thing is for me and those mares to settle our problems ourselves, outside of Goodneighbor..."

Shamrock seemed to have gotten the idea I was watching from the camera, looking up to the ceiling and waving a hoof as he answered. "Uh-huh... Well, suppose that would do it, if you're not here, I can't do anything now can I, and they don't have a reason to stay. Don't know why you'd pass on... sigh, youth is wasted on the young... Ok, considering we can get you outta here, that still leaves my other guests."

"And what do they want?"

"The Brotherhood? Oh not much... just everything... I dunno how, but they knew just what you were up to, must have had their own eggheads working on the problem and figured it out. If you hadn't sealed it right back up, they probably would'a tried to force their way in. With it shut again and all those alicorns in the way, they haven't had much luck, but they're not happy..." The mayor chuckled at their annoyance, so me running away wasn't entirely bad at least, though his flamethrower wielding guards would have been useful...

"Hmm... alright, I'll talk to them too. While I do go find Preston Gardens for me please, bring him to your office. Where are they?"

"Put their head honcho up on the third floor, room 310. Been usin' it as their own little base, ungrateful bunch'a stuck up party poopers..." He grumbled back and I cut the feed, flicking through controls until I found the room in question.

The black and white image that came up showed a room full of military ponies, suits of power armor clomping around, a desk cluttered with papers and junk shoved out to the middle of the floor with an angry looking pale pegasus mare screaming at... At two familiar forms, Paladin Dance and Scribe Wind... Interesting...

I turned up the audio and listened in a moment curiously, the rich voice barking at the pair made even the burly Paladin Dance look meek. She was wearing a crisp, charcoal and red trimmed military uniform, her mane clipped short and neat, a little darker than her coat, and she was one unhappy camper...

"You know him! Get him to open up!! Why the fuck else would I bring you two here, what good are you if you can't get one runty wastelander to do as ordered! This is unacceptable! The only chance to open this asset and some... some civilian beats us to it!!" She huffed and slammed a hoof to the table, poor Summer Wind wincing under her fury.

"F-Fast is not a civilian ma'am... We can't really convince him until he comes out either can we?" The petite pegasus stammered back to her superior, only stoking her anger.

"I read the stupid recommendations!! You two and Proctor Quiz think so highly of him, one of you can get him out! Even if you have to go up there and flap outside every damned window and wave him down!" She fumed and I had enough watching Scribe Wind try to hide behind Paladin Dance.

"That won't be necessary... I don't like it when you yell at my friends..."

I could have listened in longer, but I really didn't like how she was yelling at the two Brotherhood ponies I knew the longest. Seeing her squawk in surprise and stare all around was worth it anyway, stammering at no one as Scribe Wind recognized the voice. "FAST!? Is that you? Are you ok!? What happened!?"

"Fine Summer... er Scribe Wind..." I flinched under Jade's annoyed huff and pressed on, "So what's going on? Can I help you guys with something? Your friend seems a little upset..."

I was angry at the pegasus in charge shoving her aside to yell at the ceiling, listening and idly considering how much control I had over security. "Yes I'm upset! You have interfered in a Brotherhood operation! Claimed a Ministry Hub for yourself! The technology and resources inside do not belong in the hooves of common wasteland muckdwellers! You will open that hub this instant and..."

"No."

"WHAT!?!" Oh that was satisfying... maybe I could give her a heart attack pissing her off enough.

"I said no. This hub doesn't belong to you, you have no right to it any more than anypony else. I got here first, why should I give you what you want? I certainly don't have to..."

"YES YOU DO!!! In the name of the Brotherhood and the New Canterlot Republic, I demand you immediately relinquish all control of...." She screeched and I got to enjoy cutting her off again.

"No. I don't like talking to you, I don't think I will anymore. You have two members right there I'd much rather talk to, leave."

Jade snickered to herself watching the show with Glitter, she didn't have a lot of love for the Brotherhood anyway, hearing me mess with this one was entertaining her. Actually I was finding pretty fun too, too many of the pegasi that were part of the Enclave I had run into were snotty and stuck up like her, granted I hadn't met many, but the ratio was skewed towards her so far. I wished more were like Scribe Wind instead.

This one stamped and hopped like a spoiled filly, shouting and huffing angrily in a non stop stream I got tired of listening to. Aha, Shamrock put them in a fairly fancy room, one big enough to have security in place... Her screams died in her throat when a turret dropped from the ceiling in front of her and spun to face her alone.

"I could just tell security that you're enemies... You wouldn't believe some of the security in this place and all over Goodneighbor, you won't get your way being rude or trying to bully anypony. Leave me alone with Dance and Wind, now..."

She choked on her fury, her pale face getting darker in the monitor and grimacing. "You can speak to them wherever you wish correct? I will send them to a different room to..."

"No. That's not what I asked, yes I can talk to them wherever I want, I want to talk to them right where they are and I want all of you to leave while I do it. Go find me Proctor Pop Quiz or somepony reasonable, or at least go get a drink and chill out. I don't know or trust you, I do those two. Leave."

Paladin Dance looked torn between relief and dread at the grilling he was sure to receive later, looking around and speaking in a stern voice after they stomped out. "Still making friends everywhere you go eh Mr. Times? Captain Swells isn't really that bad... just..."

"She thinks she can just waltz in and take this place right? Had to make sure she understood that wasn't the case right up front, do you?"

The tall grey stallion gave a curt nod, pacing near his Scribe slowly. "Suppose so... I disagreed with her more forceful approach, but all these alicorns down here has a good number of our former Enclave brothers and sisters a little high strung. Leaving empty hoofed won't really work either though Fast, you know that right?"

"Actually I don't Dance, not sure I like how your Brotherhood seems to act like they can just take what they want by force... Maybe you have good reasons though, which is why I wanted to talk to you and not her, compromise is fine, ordering is not. I still hadn't taken you up on your offer to join the Brotherhood right? I don't take orders well. Why don't you start telling me what you want out of this place, and I'll tell you what I need help with... Go to Shamrock's office and we can all talk together and work something out."

I found Ivy out on her stoop again, the only alicorn in Goodneighbor I had spotted basically acting normal instead of highly agitated, though I hadn't found Magnolia or Peri yet. Oh well, Ivy was who I wanted first and she seemed ok... My point of view put me right in the animated statue of Pinkie Pie at the gates, from the way her head shot up at my voice, I assumed the speaker was working still even sitting out in the weather.

"Psst... Ivy... The statue, come here..."

Her young charges all turned and galloped to the statue ahead of her, Wicket at her side and eyeing the suddenly talking statue warily. "Wanker? T-That you? Where's yer kid, s-she's ok... right?"

Glitter rolled over from the floor and weakly held a hoof up, yelling up to the desk. "Hi Wicket! I'm.. urp... fine!"

Ivy hushed him and cleared a space with her wings, staring up at the the camera quizzically. "Fast? So you are still safe in there hmm? I suggest you stay up there awhile yet... my sisters are... upset. I am sorry for how they tried to influence you, I did advise against it, but they refuse to listen at the moment."

"Thanks Ivy, I hoped... I wasn't sure if you'd be mad, I need help though. I can't stay up here forever and your sisters can't keep squatting here waiting. I'm going to leave, w-we can try to work this out later, but like you said... probably best if I'm not around awhile huh?"

"Oh I don't know... sticking around would be rather pleasant for you... Why should I assist you, other than our friendship? You must see the awkward position I am in, help you escape my sisters when all they want is... w-what I am not above desiring myself... I put my concerns aside while you were ill, but the potion was successful, I have been mulling over what to do now that you are safe and... c-changed... Couldn't you simply acquiesce? It would be veeeeery nice..." Ivy was smooth and convincing as always, that mare was smart and dealt with others well, even without me there to read the thoughts out of and trying very hard to keep her out through the unity around us.

Unfortunately her eyes were doing that sparkly, pink thing... "Ivy! Focus... please? Look I understand how you feel, I'm sorry to ask and if you don't want to I get it. I'm not... I don't want to ok? N-Not now at least, can't you guys leave me alone for awhile? Let us figure stuff out? I'm sure eventually we can come to some kind of compromise and..."

Well... she shook off the hearts in her eyes with a blush at least, scuffing her hoof at the ground and looking up sheepishly. "I am sorry Fast... You are too valuable though, if something happens to you while you make up your mind... Oh! This is very difficult you know, most unfair... Hmm... I know, I demand a promise."

"W-Wha?"

"You promised Peri, you can promise me, then I will help. You are a pony of your word, if you promise I will trust you." She stood up straight and stamped a hoof, standing firm on the deal she extracted.

Jade had been listening attentively, her eyebrows shot up at that and she stared at me suspiciously. "Promise? What promise? Fast...."

"Eep! Er... W-We were in the King's Gambit and she... we were gonna get caught! I told her it was a bad time and she had to stop, that fooling around could come later as long as we got out of there right then... I s-sorta hoped she'd forget..."

My princess stuck her nose up and huffed with a grumble, but the world didn't come crashing down on me at least. Eventually after shifting back and forth on her hooves long enough, she leaned forward over the desk and gestured for me to turn the mic back on, clearing her throat coquettishly and speaking softly. "I... w-will consider it... that is the most concession either of you will get, only if you help us get away and do not push. I have not ignored all your arguments sister, I am aware of my selfishness and willing to admit it. With enough time, p-perhaps... but if you insist on joining the others in forcing the issue, I will never allow it."

Ivy gave the camera a flat stare, but after a moment a corner of her mouth curled up and she nodded. "That is reasonable and all I ever tried to ask sister. I am rather busy with my children here, no rush to add another personally. I believe you will find Peri more demanding however, and the others... I do hope you have some sort of plan Fast."

"Sort of..."

Done using the Hub systems to spy and communicate, the three of us sat together and stared out the pink tinted windows at the streets of Goodneighbor far below, watching alicorns flit around among all the Brotherhood pegasi. The sun was slowly heading towards the horizon, only a few hours before dark to get ready and get out of here...

Ready as we could be for this, I settled into the deep chair and took a shaky breath, closing my eyes and opening myself up to the strong bubble of telepathy surrounding the building.

Fast Times- Alicorn Level 1

Strength- 6
Perception- 9
Endurance- 7
Charisma- 7
Intelligence- 7
Agility- 9
Luck- 7

Max Skills: Science, Repair, Small Guns, Melee Weapons, Sneak

Changes in your biology you're still struggling with have set you down a different and long lived path. You now gain experience at a reduced rate, while gaining only 25% of your previous number of skill points. You do continue to acquire new perks or ranks of previous ones each time however, now able to access perks from any pool; earth, unicorn, pegasus or alicorn.

New Perk Added!------------------------------------

Pyromaniac------
---As Val says, fire fixes everything! It certainly worked on the nightmare fuel in the M.O.M. Hub! You now gain +50% damage with fire-based weapons or spells, or +25% for your preferred electricity which cooks them more on the inside than out.

Quest Perk Added--------------------------------

Awareness! It was under E!--------
---The unpredictable soul of Pinkie Pie helps you always stay alert and ready to sniff out fun! You now gain +1 Perception thanks to your favorite foalhood Ministry Mare!