Stretching my way up to fiddle with the knobs and smack a hoof on the tabletop radio in my room, I got a sour look as nothing but more static hissed out of the speaker. Getting to it was difficult enough as a small colt, being shorter than kids my age just rubbed salt in the wound every time I had to figure out a way to get to something in easy reach of most ponies, plus the radio was especially disappointing lately. I wasn't sure why, but it had been nothing but dead air forever now. Occassionally I thought I heard things through the static, but they were scary noises like screams and explosions, which only made me more uneasy.

I settled for clicking the radio off completely and felt better immediately. That done, I shrugged and galloped to the round rug of rocketships and stars strewn with all my toys, plopping down to the middle of the city of building blocks and floating up my Shrouded Stallion action figure. If the show wasn't on today for whatever reason, I'd just have to make my own.

"And now... Another exciting episode of, The Shrouded Stallion!" I mimicked the announcer's voice from my favorite radio program and smiled making my toy perch dramatically on the tallest, teetering stack of colorful bricks, continuing with the thread of my own stories. "When last we left off, the brave Shroud was fighting the mean Daybreaker in a climactic battle above the streets of fair Trotson! Bang! Fwoosh! Boom!"

Hovering up the white and fiery villain and making the two figures clash in loops above my head, my smile faded as I focused on the odd alicorn figure. It was suitably scary and a match for the Shroud, but somehow it just didn't feel right. I sighed and bit my lip looking at it, not remembering when she'd appeared in the comics, which was strange by itself. I knew the Shroud's full rogues gallery, this must be new... which was why I wanted to tune in again.

The rumble of distant thunder made me look up with a squeak, peeking out from my fluttering foal sized wings and whining at the storm clouds out on the horizon outside my window. I didn't like not being able to go out and play in the yard with Cogsworth and Sunset, wearily watching the light patter of rain on the clean glass and it dripping off the bright green trees.

"Bored, bored, booooooored..."

I flopped to my back and pouted, wondering when mom would make lunch and drumming my legs, kicking block buildings aside with a huff. I wasn't hungry, but it would be something different. It felt like I'd been in here forevvvvver... I mean, I liked being in my warm little room with all my stuff, and usually I didn't care about being alone, but sometimes I liked seeing somepony else. At least for a little bit... I felt lonely and wondered how long I'd been keeping to myself in here. What day was it? When did I have school next? Was it summer vacation?

Why couldn't I really remember clearly?

Oh well, there were books to read and games to play, I had lots of other toys too. I hopped back up to my haunches and shrugged, shuffling things around and looking over the ones that jumped out at me. Some of these weren't from the Shroud's playset, but were vaguely familiar. A strong looking zebra rearing back on its stand on a game of Rock 'em, Buck 'em Broncos. A pretty batpony mare in radio controlled power armor that looked like one of Luna's guards. A bright and fiery griffon wind up flier with wide red wings and a propeller on her fluff of tail. One of Sunset's Alicorn Angel dolls she must have left here, this one being the pretty blue one I liked the most, though I'd never tell her how much I liked her girly toys. This one just made me feel.... funny...

The radio blared back to life with a crackle of static and I jumped from looking over the little blue alicorn, gulping nervously at the stupid device. I turned that off! I just wanted to sit here in my room and... and not... not think! Just sit where it was warm and safe and quiet.

I threw a pillow at it and stuck my tongue out as it faded in a hiss again, though the lights didn't go out once my missile bounced off, falling over into the rocking chair by the window I'd read in. The movement made the creaky chair shift, knocking over a pale stuffed dolly hidden by a blanket that stared back with pink button eyes under its silver yarn mane.

The storm outside boomed, the lights flickered and room shook, making me scramble to my hooves and dive under the bed with a scaredy-foal yelp, but I didn't care and nopony was around to see anyway. Just that dolly in the pink dress, watching me hiding and crying. I didn't like how it made me feel, I didn't like the storm outside with its scary noises, I didn't like any of it. I was just going to stay hiding down here in the dark until it all stopped, that was it...

The storm growing louder and darker outside didn't matter. That dolly didn't matter. Nothing mattered... I had my room and my stuff and I was just not going to care about anything else, ever again. If I didn't care, it couldn't hurt me.

As if to disprove me, a brilliant flash came right on top of a roar of thunder and I gave a shrill scream at a branch smashing through the window, sending sheets of rain and howling winds in that blew in even under my hiding spot. Even worse was how the assault knocked that poor dolly from the chair entirely, now flopped in a boneless heap on the floor and staring right at me under the bed. It hurt even more seeing it lying there like that, the freezing rain dripping off those big pink button eyes like tears. Nononononono.... NO! Go away! Don't make me...

I wailed at the room shaking hard enough to send cracks up the walls. Through my cowering hooves and feathers, I could see them falling away and nothing but blackness beyond them. The square floor shape of my little room was the only thing that existed in a vast and scary void of nothingness. I hid and cried, willing it all away, for somepony to help, for it to stop hurting so much...

"Oh my... Come here little one, it's alright..." A soft, soothing whisper spoke up and I cracked my eyes open, blinking at the blinding sunshine filtering in under my bed and the warm yellow hoof reaching out to my trembling one, gently pulling me out into the light.

...and into a warm meadow full of sunshine and animals?

Looking up to the kindly mare holding my hoof and closing her teal eyes in a smile, I gaped at a very famous pony. "M-Ministry Mare Fluttershy?"

"Oh, noooo. I never liked that title. Just Fluttershy is fine, are you alright? You sounded very afraid and hurt... but you look ok now." She was younger than I thought she should look somehow, but beautiful and sweet, giving a concerned look through her long pink mane and tilting my chin up with her feathers.

"I... I am? I don't know... I was somewhere else and... where are we Min.." I slowly answered, pausing when I saw her flinch and tut at her title coming out automatically, then editing myself sheepishly. "Er... F-Fluttershy... ma'am... what is this place?"

Getting a better look around with her, it was truly incredible. There were animals everywhere, flamingos and ducks in the water of a small pond with a babbling waterfall behind it, full of rocky caves and animal burrows, bushes and trees swarming with fluttering birds and butterflies, grassy fields and hills of tiny chipmunks, bunnies, badgers, squirrels and even a big hairy bear. The sun and gentle breeze were warm and the whole place radiated a feeling of peace and contentment, a sanctuary away from the storm I'd hidden from.

Sanctuary...

That familiar word was simply repeated by the softly smiling pegasus filly, waving a wing out to all the critters with a watchful white bunny on her back coming into view as she turned in place. "It's my sanctuary, umm... a-animal sanctuary I mean. Do you like it? It's a place I always wanted to make for all my little animal friends, to come heal and be safe."

"It's... it's really nice, yeah Miss Fluttershy. Much better than where I was before. C-Could I stay here too? Where it's safe and I can just... feel better?"

The nice mare sighed wearily in response, flicking her eyes to the jagged peaks on the horizon and the dark clouds rumbling over them so far away. Then she voiced a frightened whinny and gave my flank a nudge to follow her to a lovely little tea party spread out on a checkered picnic blanket. She poured from a kettle wrapped in a fairly crude tea cozy, sharing cucumber sandwiches and tea cakes before answering.

"If you wanted. Sometimes everycreature needs somewhere to let somepony take care of them when they're hurt. That's all I ever wanted to do, to Be Kind... Letting you stay m-might not be very good though. I don't think you want to, not really..." Fluttershy's eyes misted as she looked down at me slumping at her words, seeming uncertain and uncomfortable at my whine.

"But I do! It's so nice here, a-and so are you, and pretty, and there's tea and food and... I'm not alone here. I really, really would like to stay Miss Fluttershy, pretty please?"

She leaned forward to give me a needed hug, but stroked my cheek and shook her head sadly. "I would, but sometimes being kind means not giving what somepony thinks they want, but what they actually need. Like some of my little bird friends are scared to fly again if they fall out of the nest, but they belong in the sky. E-Even if they need a push."

"Oh... So I can't...? I just didn't want to be alone..."

At that she smiled beautifully, nudging my drooping muzzle up to the blue skies above and a wispy gleam in the distant mountains, like a pale blue beacon against the storm on the horizon above it still raging far away. "You're not. There's a special somepony for you out there. If you stayed here, she'd be alone and sad too."

It was hard to make out and ethereal, but the strange blue speck of light up there didn't make me afraid. It was warm and inviting, a comforting, familiar glow that filled me with longing. I wanted to reach it somehow, to touch it and hold it in my hooves. That brave little light under the scary storm filled me with courage and determination, I'd give anything to be there, even face that tempest. So long as I could find it... find her...

"Jade..."

I croaked out the word before realizing it, looking up in surprise at Fluttershy nodding with a cute little "Mm-hmm!" in reply as she held my hoof in hers and trotted towards a small cottage on a hill nearby.

"But I don't understand! Why can't that light, w-why can't she just come here too? Then we could all be together and we wouldn't have to... to go that way, w-where it's scary and... it hurts... Why can't we stay where it's nice?"

"It's nice, but it will never change here Fast. I never wanted anycreature to get hurt, but the only way for that to happen is if nothing ever changes at all. Sometimes change hurts, but it's part of life. So is she... You have to be a brave colt and try for me, ok? I'll always be here with you to help." Fluttershy gave a determined nod and swatted my flank, getting me to keep going past the picket fence of the cute little cottage and down the path, while she was held back by some invisible force at the gate.

Her eyes shimmered at me looking back hesitantly, but shooed me on with a firm and supportive stare I couldn't really disappoint. Besides... I did want to get to that blue glow up there, even if that meant trudging towards the scary storm that rumbled at my approach.

The winds howled and lightning flashed over the distant peaks, but I clung to the image of that blue speck shining in the darkness and fluttered my wings in a blur, hovering just over the winding dirt road at a slowly increasing pace. No matter what, I just had to keep calm and flutter on, then I knew I'd get there. Somehow.

"Ughhh...."

Woozily looking around, I found myself groaning and hanging upside down from a tree branch pinning my hindleg in its boughs and tried to figure out what happened. All around me was green leaves and bright red apples, beads of rain dripping down to the muddy puddles of fields below as I struggled weakly, rustling the foliage enough to get a surprised, accented holler.

"Tarnation! Hang on jus' a second there sugarcube, Ah'll get ya down!" I had a moment to puzzle over the familiar voice and gallop of hooves coming close, then the whole tree shook and I found myself falling, landing in a basket full of apples that had been slid under me.

"Ow... W-What? Where am..." I struggled and flailed, falling out among an avalanche of delicious looking apples as the basket tipped over, then simply goggling at the face smiling down from beneath the shade of a cowpony hat. "Ministry Mare Applejack!?"

"Ain't no need ta put on airs there lil' feller. Cain't have folks comin' ta the Apple Family Farm an' callin' me such high falootin' names, mah Granny'd tan mah hide. You ok there?" The sturdy earth pony filly nearly yanked me off my hooves with a helpful foreleg, waving out cheerily to the rolling hills and bright red barn behind her.

"I think so... I was flying somewhere, but the wind was so strong and I... I wasn't strong enough I guess?"

Raising an eyebrow, Applejack jerked her head for me to follow her through the rows of apple trees and gave a friendly snort. "Well, ya'll do look a mite puny. Ah don't think ya'll're been completely honest there though Fast. Stubborn lil' buck like you wouldn't give up that easy, would ya?"

"I... I wasn't giving up, just taking a rest is all... then I crashed here somehow and... Is this reeeeally Sweet Apple Acres? Like your actual-factual home? None of this seems quite right..."

"Oh this is tha ol' homestead awright, never should have left her I reckon. Course if'n AH'M bein' totally honest too, I guess it ain't neither. Just a lil' sliver of home maybe, but where ah belong. Might'a lost sight of that, but it's easy to convince yerself the lies we all tell ourselves are true, huh?" The warm orange earth pony gave me a knowing wink as I trotted along with her, flicking her braided tail at my face when I looked down guiltily.

"Maybe I wasn't taking a break. It was so hard though... I'm really not that strong a flier yet either and..." I stammered back, then pinned my ears back at her expectant green eyes and tapping hoof pausing ahead of me. "...and I'm scared, ok!"

"Everypony gets scared kiddo, anypony what says they don't is lyin' too. Ah told mahself plenty, so I know. A whole bushel basket o' mistakes, that's fer sure. Tell me tha truth now though, do you wanna stop?" The firm mare waited on me, patiently and calmly until I could muddle through my fuzzy thinking enough to get past the excuses and fractured memories.

I wasn't too clear what was going on, where I'd been or been going, or much of anything really... but the truth came from my heart whether I understood it or not when I looked up to the glimmer of blue light flashing somewhere past the storm clouds so far away. "No. I don't want to give in. I just... I don't know if I can keep going. How I can..."

"One hoof in front of the other, that's how! So long as it's where ya'll really wanna git to, they'll find their way there somehow. When tha goin' gets tough, the tough get goin'! It's the earth pony way!" Applejack led me through the dusty yard around the idyllic red barn and farmhouse, reaching a gate at the end of the drive reading 'Sweet Apple Acres' and pointing a hoof down the lane headed into town from there, pausing sadly at the end of her property.

"Can't... Can't you come with me? Show me the way? P-Please Miss Applejack?"

Instead she shook her head and hid her bright green eyes under the brim of her battered hat, sniffling and scuffing the dirt with a forced cheer to her voice. "Sorry lil' feller, here's where I belong an' I cain't go no further. Happy trails partner! Ya'll can make it if you try! Just Be Strong! Sweet Apple Acres n' me'll be right here if'n ya'll ever need us!"

I made it as far as the picturesque little town closer to the storm, then started losing courage and determination to keep going past the wonderfully inviting little village I found myself in. It was full of vibrant, clean and friendly ponies who all smiled and waved, but paid a lost little colt like me little heed, busy going about their own lives and not paying any attention to the storm up in the mountains.

Not that I could really blame them, it was a nice town and I felt welcome enough. I did still want to keep going, chasing after that blue speck that never seemed to get any closer, but it had been a long trot so far and I really could use a break, honest! I'd just look around a little, then keep going later. I was tired, hungry and thirsty, didn't I deserve a rest and something for me?

I was so absorbed looking around at all the interesting sights and smells, I ran smack into a pink door being flung open in my path, falling back to my rump and rubbing my nose, peeking up from under a bundle of frilly clothes half hiding the view of the carousel shaped building I found myself in the shadow of.

"Oh, my word darling! Are you alright!? Terribly sorry, my fault, I was in my own little world getting these dresses ready. There, there, let's have a look at you..." The stunning white unicorn suddenly fretting over me made me give an embarassed squeak as my little wings shot up, hiding under the bundle of silky fabric she was trying to tug me out of in a field of blue magic.

"R-R-Rarity!? I mean... umm! I-I'm ok! D-Don't..."

"Pish-posh, nothing to turn such an amusing shade of cinnamon over dear. Take some pride in being fabulous, the world could always use more beauty and those little wings are quite adorable. Though you really must do something with your mane darling, perhaps a rakish chapeau?" I winced at the gorgeous Ministry Mare's lidded smirk over her ruby glasses as she licked a hoof to smooth my mane, feeling my cheeks burning in the presence of the stunning filly.

The silver banded black fedora she floated down from a pile of boxed clothing she'd been taking outside made me give another yelp as it approached my horn though, a sudden flash of dread that made her look crestfallen as I jabbered. "No! Not that! I'm not!"

"Hmm? Oh come now, it suits you dear. Don't hurt my feelings by rejecting a gift earnestly given, you'll make a lady cry Fast. Not something a proper young colt should be doing..." Rarity put her lower lip out in a playful pout, waggling the floating fedora hopefully as I tried to figure out that instinctual reaction. That was the Shroud's hat... why wouldn't I want it?

"S-Sorry... Umm... f-for not looking where I was going, and getting your dresses dirty, and umm... t-the wings..."

My face just glowed hotter at her girlish giggle, still eagerly holding out the hat while I scuffed my hoof at her teasing. "I'll accept it as a generous compliment, hmm? Provided you accept my own. This is yours. Just because somepony else wears the same outfit, doesn't mean you can't too. It's a question of who wore it better, isn't it?"

"I... I guess so. It is really nice and I like it, I just don't know if I can... It... It probably costs a lot, doesn't it?"

"I suppose it may be a tad expensive, but I don't think you're stingy when it comes to what's important, are you? Just the opposite in fact. I dare say you may have been repeating my mistakes and spreading yourself a little thin. Difficult to resist when others need you, but one must remember to take a little time out for a trip to pamper oneself a the spa now and then. When one has the chance of course..." Rarity took off her glasses and gave me a knowing smirk, earning a wince as I fidgeted under those long lashes fluttering patiently.

"I umm... I was sorta thinking of treating myself when I ran into you actually. I'm trying to get there... but like you said, er... pamper myself and all..."

"It is also very rude for a proper gentlecolt to keep a lady waiting though darling. You look to have a ways to go yet and I'm afraid you'll have to Be Unwavering in your desire to get there, but I'm quite certain you won't disappoint." Rarity clapped the oversized fedora to my head and nodded up to the storm, giving a little nudge to send me on my way I dug my hooves in against with a snort.

"I don't get this! I don't understand anything! Where am I? What's going on! Why can't I think straight!? Where am I even going!?"

She got a sad look in those deep blue eyes as I cried again, indulgently sighing and waving me towards a confectionery decorated business across the street. "Hmm... perhaps you are a bit famished and cranky dear. I do believe even Twilight would understand a slight delay to the schedule in this instance, though it is probably lucky she's not waiting up ahead in her library yet. Here you are, go on down to Sugarcube Corner and get yourself something to bring a smile to dose widdle cheeks! My treat!"

She smiled brightly and floated a golden bit to my hoof, but I caught a dark ribbon of eyeshadow trail down her cheek as she turned back to her shop. It was nice of her to buy me something to eat, especially since I didn't have any money or possessions beyond the new hat. Though gulping up to the dark skies beyond the mountain and that difficult to spot blue gleam, I didn't feel like smiling very much.

"H-Hello? The nice lady Rarity outside said you were open? I wanted..."

A golden bell above the doorway gave a bright jingle as I poked my head further in the silent bakery. Like the rest of Ponyville, it looked perfect, but also weirdly like being inside a picture postcard. The gleaming glass cases and wooden shelves of flawlessly scrumptious desserts only added to the impression and made me wary, caution that seemed reasonable with a sudden crash of pots and pans behind the counter and a manic pink blur charging at me.

"Ohmigosh I've been waiting foreeeeever! I had an itchy nose, twitchy tail, lazy ear doozy, so I hoped it would be today! But it's always today I guess, so I wasn't sure! Here! EAT!" A rapidly jabbering ball of energy got to me before I could retreat, speaking in a giddy, cheery voice as the strange form of Pinkie Pie herself shoved something warm and delicious in my muzzle with a squeak before I could scamper off.

"Mmhrmm? MMM! Msgud!"

The incredible taste of sugar and carrots filled my senses as I munched with growing enthusiasm, looking up to the wide grin the slightly crazy looking famous mare had. Her rich pink mane was poofy and dusted with flour along with her lighter fur and the apron she wore, while her bright blue eyes kept getting bigger along with her smile as I choked out my surprised gratitude.

Her mane seemed to deflate as she watched though, her brows coming down as I felt my eyes water and my cheeks getting soaked with tears. I sniffled and wiped at them hurriedly, trying to swallow it down to apologize and only getting more confused. It really was an amazing... cupcake? That's what she had on the platter strangely held by her tail behind her anyway, so I assumed that's what I was eating. Why would something so wonderful make me so sad though...?

It was familiar... sweet and carroty, pale frosting with little candy carrots stuck in the top of each little cake. I'd not had anything so good in... in longer than I could remember. I was crying harder and harder the more I miserably chewed and watched the happy filly droop, now feeling embarrassed as well for being a baby and making her feel bad too, when I didn't even understand why...

"I-It's ok little guy... I was making these cause I thought they'd be waaaay better than those Fancy Buck preservative bombs, but I guess it's still a little close for comfort, huh?" Pinkie gave a weak smile and wiped a bit of frosting from my muzzle with her hoof, licking it thoughtfully and giving a shrug.

"I... N-No, they're really great, honest! I... I d-don't know why I'm crying... Sorry... Y-You must think I'm really silly Miss Pinkie Pie, I just... the taste makes me really sad for some reason..."

"I'm the last pony to call anycreature else silly Fast, there's nothing to say sorry about. I knew it might make you sad, but sometimes you have to let the hurt in to ever feel like laughing again. I wanted to make you lots so you'd have plenty for your trip. Plus I don't think you'll like the food on the other side very much. I wish you could take some with you, for... for you to share with a special filly who loves them, cause sharing is caring, right?" Even Pinkie sniffled along with me, then visibly cheered and tossed me to her back, bouncing around the room and singing. "You gotta shaaaaare! You gotta caaaaaare!"

Spinning dizzily when Pinkie ended her chorus by whipping me off her back with her tail and sitting me up on a squeaky stool at the counter, I blinked up to that manic, hopeful, panting grin and gave a crooked smile back. I absently fiddled with another of the wonderful carrot cupcakes in my hooves as she dumped the rest of the tray onto a cloth napkin, then deftly tied the whole thing up into a bundle on a stick while still humming under her breath.

"I did... I cared about... somepony who'd really like these I think. Why can't I remember her?"

"Becaaaaause, this place isn't about thinking and remembering silly! That's all brainy-head type stuff. Everything here is about feeling! Like with your heart and soul!" Pinkie simply giggled merrily at my confusion, poking my chest as she gave a prancing dance in front of me, spinning and pulling a sparkly cape and glittery gold microphone from nowhere as she tossed her head back and loosed a raspy shout. "And... Owwww! I feel good! Don't you Fast?"

"Er... I... I guess so? Even though I'm sad, tasting these does make me feel kinda happy too somehow."

"Exacta-tootly! We wouldn't even know why laughing and feeling happy was so great if we never felt sad at all, so it's ok to cry too. Awareness! Feelings! Feeling is the best! Which is why you have to keep going, even when it gets hard and feels bad. If you stay here, you won't get to feel super happy too, and that's no good. Me an' the girls will always be right here if you need us, but you belong out there, so we can feel all the great stuff there is about being alive!" The beaming pink earth pony threw her forelegs high, like she was waving out to everything in the world at once as proof of her difficult to follow point like it was an answer.

It also gave me an uncomfortable thought that sent a chill down my tail as I tried to speak it... "Alive? Am I... is this all... a-am I not alive Pinkie?"

"Do you feel alive?"

"Umm... y-yes? I feel sad and hurt... but there's something... somepony out there and I want to get there. I want to see... to feel her, t-them again..."

"Then you definitely are silly! There'll always be a lil' cutie-wootie Fast here with us, but there's a whole wild wasteland out there with lots of good friends and... less good food, ok... But still, totally worth it! You know where you belong in your heart, so the rest is eeeeeasy! I can even help!" Pinkie nodded sagely, then scooped me up off the stool and went back to bouncing across the room, ending at a candy cane banister to the stairs and dumping me to a small rug before it.

"Well, I could use help... I know that, but I don't know..."

"No knowing! Feeling! Keep that feeling in your heart and let me handle the rest! Please keep your wings and hooves inside the cannon at all times too!" Before I could even finish speaking, Pinkie leapt off the ground, planting her forelegs on the bannister and yanking it down with a squeal of pure delight.

The rug under my hooves suddenly dropped away and I fell into a round hole, scrambling against tall, smooth walls with a sudden yelp, "W-Wait, Cannon!?!"

"Don't worry! It's a cannon for PAAAARTIES!!! Boomshakalaka!" Pinkie's crazed titters replied, then the world exploded and I was blown straight out the top of bakery, watching Pinkie Pie, Sugarcube Corner and Ponyville itself receding rapidly as I blasted off towards the stormy peaks.

"WHAAAAUUUGH!!! Too Fast! Too Fast!"

I screamed as I kept rocketing through the air, the howling winds buffeting me around until everything was spinning and I started to fall. My blurring little foal's wings couldn't pull out of this kind of insane dive, what kind of lunatic shot kids out of cannons!? I was going to smash into the mountains before I ever even got near the top and...

"Wha'dya mean 'too fast'!? A- There's no such thing, and B- Isn't your name Fast?" A chuckling voice interrupted my panicking fall, toned pale blue forelegs wrapped around my barrel and much stronger wings took up the slack, getting me to peek up to the smirking upside down face under the blown back rainbow colored tresses whipping in the storm.

"R-R-Rainbow D-Dash!? You're here too? What are you..."

"Well if there's cloudbustin' to be done, who'd you expect kid? Rarity!?" In reply, the famous Wonderbolt mare tossed me up and caught me on her back, speeding on with a confident grin while I gaped.

"I didn't expect any of this! I don't know if even you can fly through all that though! J-Just look at it!"

The Ministry Mare's violet eyes flicked up to the raging storm getting closer and she gave a bored neigh, snorting fearlessly as she sped up even more. "Pssshh! That's not so bad! You're a Junior Speedster right? Pony up and Be Awesome! I'm not the one flying through it after all, just acting as your wingpony!"

"M-Me!? Fly!? I can't! Not through that! I'm not very good and..."

I paused my instant denial at Rainbow Dash's flat look back, flinching until she did a loop and lined us up on the bright blue gleam ahead nearly lost in the rain and wind. "If you wanna get there, it's on you kiddo. You've got friends waiting on you, you're not gonna let them down, are you?"

This close, I could see the light I'd been following was midway up the tallest peak, a vaguely regular outline on the mountainside swirling with storms and sheeting rain. Looking at it now, I stomped down on my fear and gave a determined nod. I still wasn't completely sure why it was so important, but I felt it... I had to get there, for her...

"O-Ok! I'm going! C-Can you fly with me though? Please??"

She looked sad at that, like the others had... shaking her head and sighing at the flash of lightning that made me see spots, vaguely hearing distant screams through the thunder that faded away again as she replied. "Can't do that, even though I am awesome. I can do you almost as good though. If a storm is in the way, there's one way to get rid of it in a hurry and and only one mare to do it, right? Follow as close as you can and just remember, I'll always be up here in the wild blue yonder with you! Making sky-bound soars and daring dives! So you better do your part!"

"I... I will! Umm... I'll make it my quest to someday be the very best! I promise!"

Laughing uproariously at me crossing my heart with the solemn oath, the fastest pegasus in Equestria zoomed ahead of me and showed just how far I had to go to live up to the Junior Speedster oath, blasting ahead and leaving a rainbow colored contrail streaking behind her that provided a bright path to follow through all the darkness as my own wings buzzed as fast as I could get them to go.

She was nothing more than a speck in an instant, but I watched closely as the air distorted around her retreating form, the long ribbon of rainbow growing brighter and brighter until it exploded in a blinding flash and blew a hole through the storm ahead. There was some unearthly howl from the squall in response, lightning flashing out at her as she banked hard from the mountains and headed back for Ponyville. She gave me a hoofbump as she passed with a whoop, one last bit of encouragement I took to heart as I dove forward for the bright blue light ahead.

The storm rumbled and growled as it pushed back in, the winds trying to blow me back again and nearly succeeding. I could see the brilliant glow of my goal clearly now, growing brighter and bigger as I dove after it without worrying about anything else anymore. A gear shape of shining light in the side of the black mountain, the door to the Stable... the way back I crashed through with a terrified shout and...

...looked down to the rubble strewn floor far below, blinking blearily and trying to figure out what I was looking at. My eyes focused enough to figure out I was staring straight down a long vertical pit, criss crossed with bits of junk and timbers forming suspended bridges over the ruined building. Then I realized I was apparently hanging upside down and promptly fell, smacking in to every one of those bridges and paths on the way down.

"WhaaaAAUUGHH!! Ow! Ouch! Damn! What! Ack! FUCK!"

I crashed to a groaning heap of very hurt pony at the bottom, stumbling and wincing at the fantastic amount of pain I found myself in. Woozily getting my hooves under me and opening my eyes clenched at the ringing headache I had, I paled on coming face to face with a huge hellhound and skittered back, yelping when I fell over something else and rolled to a stop.

Casting a fearful look back over my withers, I blanched on figuring out it was a hellhound face alright, but nothing else... Or rather, everything else, just in not the right places... What looked like a vicious alpha hellhound had been decaptiated and the head was stuck on a bent piece of rebar, dead... Not about to eat me.

"Owww.... w-what... Where...?" I groaned as I shook off the sudden fright, rubbing my head and looking around the ruin I found myself in.

Ruin... I was in a ruin! I was... back? From where? Was I just somewhere else? It was fading like a dream, a long, very fucked up dream... but nice I think? Slowly my brain decided to try functioning again, taking in details slowly as I puzzled things out.

Looking up to where I started from, I saw all the bridges I'd fallen off of crossing numerous floors of some kind of professional building overhead, the view here from the basement going all the way up to the crumbling roof. It smelled awful in here and looked like some kind of raider den, but it was real... all too real... Now that I was looking around down in the pit I wound up in, I realized the hellhound corpse wasn't the only dead body nearby contributing to the awful smell and gagged, my eyes flicking from dismembered bodies of ponies, griffons, ghouls, miretanks, radhogs, feral dogs...

Somepony had turned this place into an abattoir.

Looking down to the sticky mess matting my fur, I got a sinking sensation as I took in all the blood and gore I was coated with along with the ugly burns and sat on my haunches with a thump. Somepony... was me it looked like... Why didn't I remember? What happened?

"G-Glitter..."

I croaked as it started coming back slowly... We'd been in Diamond City, chasing Vega because he had her and then... Glitter... Glitter had...

I held my head in my hooves and whimpered at the rush of memories, looking away to the mutilated bodies just to not see her little face going blank, her falling to a heap, Jade crying... Even the horror show I found myself in at the moment was better than remembering that. I'd seen plenty of dead bodies after all, even ones like these that looked like some cannibalistic raiders had been gnawing on them.

Bloody, toothmarked bones rolled underhoof as I backed away, trying to focus on the stomach churning sight just to not think of my poor filly. My sour stomach just produced a burp while I was grimly trying to stay with the unpleasant present instead of the horrific past, a burp that brought up a meaty, bloody taste that made me start really noticing all the bites and missing organs from the corpses.

Feeling my coat pale as I touched it with numb hooves, I hacked and coughed up a bit of pink mane that had been stuck in my teeth, then looked up to see a recently dead raider head with a matching spiky mane and it all hit home. I shook my head and closed my eyes, backing away from the idea as my stomach revolted entirely.

It wasn't the relief I hoped for. When I opened one bloodshot eye, I saw the steaming pile of ...meat... I just puked up and retched again and again, flying up and away blindly as I screamed myself hoarse. I had... I'd been eating... I'd...

"No... G-Goddesses please forgive me...NO!"

Location Discovered: Kindle Hospital.

Some time later, I still felt shaky and sick, having retreated to the highest scrap built perchs and bridges crossing the wide open four story ruin spread below me and as far from the disgusting pantry of corpses as I could get. A look through the boarded up windows showed a cloudy grey day outside and reminded my pip-buck to start working again apparently. I must have been close enough to have the mapping spell update before now since I woke up here, but the divination magic seemed to still recognize it was new to... well, me...

I thought I was me anyway... I was still really confused about a lot on that score, plagued by weird snatches of memory and feeling that I'd been somewhere else, but having no idea where. No matter what I tried, I could remember anything after... after what happened to Glitter...

Sitting on my haunches with my hindlegs dangling off the rickety bridge of junk stretching across the fourth floor of the old hospital, I sobbed again just getting those brief flashes. She was gone... I didn't even care she was a synth anymore, I just knew I missed her. I wanted to see her cute face and bright smile again, to hear her laughing voice so full of joy and love, to hug her warm little body and never let go. But she wasn't here... nopony was.

I was alone... The ruined hospital had been a raider den from the looks of things, now it was just one big grave. Not even just that, the more I numbly looked around, the more I realized it had become some kind of monster's lair while I'd been... elsewhere. The basement far below my hooves with the weakly chugging arcano-flux generator was some kind of disgusting larder of corpses, tossed with bodies that had been... ick... snacked on... The rest of the place didn't get much better from there. Body parts were strewn about, decoratively piled up, the walls were splashed with blood and scrawled over in bizaare old ponish text written in the same. I had no idea what any of it said, but just looking at a section surrounding a blood drawn unflattering image of Celestia, my eyes ached trying to make sense of the absolute madness.

I'd flown back up to where I initially woke up hanging upside down from the ceiling like Witchy, mainly because of the pile of rusting orange barrels stacked around the spot in a nest of some kind. The soothing radiation eased my numerous aches and pains anyway, letting me start trying to take stock of my own body and surroundings. I was covered in burns... scorched sections of my hide sloughed off as new flesh regenerated under the damage, so I'd been fighting at some point. There were bullet wounds, bruises and cuts sealing back over again, but the burns were the most significant.

Nearby I'd found my saddlebags and other possessions, tucked under a pile of toxic barrels. My magical comic book costume was still here though, clapping the bloody fedora to my head felt a little better somehow and I morosely went through the rest, taking heart in the mellow glow of five Ministry Mare statuettes still there and humming weakly.

I'd lost a week... I was able to figure that out after long enough just by checking my pip-buck's date and time, blanching at the discrepancy and wondering what exactly I'd been doing that long. Taking a look at the map while I was at it, I discovered Kindle Hospital was in Manebridge, north of the river from Diamond City and not far from the ruins of C.I.A.T. itself.

I briefly hovered over the locator tag system while I was on that menu, feeling my eyes tearing up as I scrolled down the list of names there and wanting desperately to bring up Jade's, to know where she was and what I should do. The next name below hers made me freeze up however, Glitter's entry just sitting there...

No... I couldn't face wherever she wound up, I couldn't look up where my wife and family was or I'd want to go there and that was just... a bad idea... I'd been out of my mind for a week, killing and eating ponies and Celestia only knows what else. I was too dangerous to be around any of them... The fact they weren't here was evidence enough. They should all stay away, I had no idea if I'd even stay me or... I might hurt them...

No! Please no, not again! I shivered and whimpered at the clear voice of 'Be Dark...' speaking up in my head, a growling yawn reverberating in my skull. It didn't come with more of a headache than I already had at least, but I could feel it watching... A curious, expectant silence stretched out while I waited for the hammer to drop, but nothing catastrophic happened.

Laying my ears back at the eventual mutter between them, I was surprised and cautious on the response the Shroud finally settled on. We were too close to really lie to each other, it meant that...

"What... you missed me?"

"Seriously? You seem like you've been having fun without me... I didn't expect such a warm welcome back..."

"Help you!? You've been EATING PONIES!!!"

"No! Forget it! I'm not helping you do even more insane shit! I should just... just stop you now!" Yelling to nopony, I dove for my saddlebags and fished out Kellogg's old revolver, shoving the barrel under my chin with a crazed shout.

Before the spirit could stop me, I pulled the trigger with a flinch, sighing helplessly at the flat click and letting it clatter to the floor. Looking down at it, I sniffled on seeing how poorly maintained it was. The silver finish was coated in sticky blood, the hammer and iron sights had bits of hair and gore stuck to them. It looked like it had most recently been used as a club to bash somepony's brains in, not the well oiled firearm it should be.

I flipped the cyllinder open and shook out the empty casings morosely, wearily pulling out my tools and cleaning kit from my bags that were thankfully still where they should be. It was desperate and stupid, but in that instant blowing my brains out seemed like a good idea.

The soft, sad song of the Ministry Mares and wary whisper from the Shroud kept me from trying again. I felt exhausted listening to that hopeful melody telling me not to give in, lending me what strength they could with the vague impression of the famous mares themselves standing with me. It was because of them that I was still here... even if I couldn't remember, I could feel that much. They'd done what they could to shelter and protect me, brought me back when I should have just disappeared into the darkness forever.

It still felt like they were wasting their time, but I couldn't bring myself to disappoint them. Those fillies were the best of us once, the Elements of Harmony, everything good ponies should aspire to be. Even they made mistakes and failed, but they never stopped trying. The Shroud was more selfishly focused, but even it seemed concerned, allowing me to clean my revolver in silence and think, though I noticed it was keeping a close watch on what I was up to. The feeling of its hooves hovering over mine to take over was palpable.

I sat there and cried while I worked, the soothing repair tedium my only solace. Once I finished with the revolver, I dragged my bags out and started checking them over, giving a disgusted huff on finding each of my firearms in equally poor states of repair with empty chambers.

"You don't get guns at all, do you?"

The derisive snort of an answer that got made me feel a little defensive. That's all I was good for, a repair-pony... I wished that was all I was again and tried to at least pretend, breaking down the Terrible Shotgun and cleaning it in a swirl of telekinesis.

I finished the shotgun and paused on floating the 10mm Deliverer to my hooves, ejecting the clip and unsurprised to find it empty too. The Shroud had apparently fired every weapon until they ran out of ammo, then hadn't known what to do. My stomach loudly grumbled and broke my rhythm before I got started though, the queasy, quavering growl and nasty tasting belch leaving me holding my unhappy belly and scowling again over what it had been full of when I woke up.

"NO! I am not a freaking cannibal!"

I opened my clenched eyes at the tempting whisper, finding my gaze drawn down to a wrecked break room half hanging out over the open pit below my hooves. The lingering taste of bile in my throat decided me at least, hopping down to a lower bridge and following my nose to the carroty smell in the air coming from that way. The wall facing the pit was torn away, but rusty cabinets, countertops and crumbling tables remained, the nicked surfaces stacked with a mountain of empty Sparkle Cola bottles that made me pause curiously.

Every glass bottle had its top lopped off, a clean cut at the tapering neck with dozens of the still bottlecap bedecked tops rolling underhoof. They were all empty, drained of the numerous colors I could see dregs of remaining in them. A pair of vending machines in the corner looked like they had been ripped apart by a hellhound, the fizzling and faded painted faces showing a cheery Fluttershy that made me smile weakly and a Cowpony hat wearing Celestia on the Sunrise Sarsaparilla machine that made me frown. Celestia's smiling face had two bottles smashed right through the eyes, blood was artistically dribbled down her sunlit countenance and an unflattering handlebar mustache had been scrawled on her muzzle.

There were still unopened drinks piled up around the machines, so I floated up a lukewarm orange Sparkle Cola Classic and twisted the cap off with a hiss. Seeing my knife hovering nearby in my magic before slowly bobbing away once I opened the beverage, I blinked between it and all the sliced open bottles tossed around in here.

"Really? You couldn't figure out a bottlecap on your own?"

"It's a bottlecap... you just twist it off. Decapitation is not an answer for everything..."

"You really do need me, don't you? What's the matter? Being in charge isn't as easy as you thought?"

Chugging the ambrosial liquid down after spitting some out to cleanse my palette from... what I'd been eating... I couldn't help a tired snicker at the petulant silence in my head. I'd noticed the Shroud wasn't very good with guns and modern technology before, but this answered one question. It didn't have access to my knowledge without me around. Just like it could cast spells I couldn't. Whatever it had been doing, it was lacking a lot of information that could have made it more effective.

Continuing my muttering exploration, I cracked open the battered breakroom fridge and froze, my ears drooping and fresh tears running down as I looked in the dead container. Snack cakes... It was stuffed with nothing but Fancy Buck Snack Cakes, piles of them spilling out at my hooves and spreading across the dusty tiled floor. Some were covered in mud, or blood, or dust clouding their cellophane packets, enough to tell they'd come from all over the place and been stashed here one by one.

Glitter's favorite food... The Shroud had been hoarding them... for her.

Zed told me something about spirits possessing ponies once, that having a physical body and sensations was like a drug for them. Judging by the other boxes and wrappers strewn around, the Shroud had been indulging itself, not just on meat, but everything good and yummy it could find. But the snack cakes were for Glitter... Even without me around, it had felt... something for her.

"Y-Yeah... me too."

Floating the stash of snack cakes back to the fridge and closing it again, I kept looking around idly. A small shack of junk lumber built into the broken rooms of a lower floor looked like the raiders' armory, full of assorted caliber rounds rolling around and stacked haphazardly with more weapons of higher quality. Several were gleaming examples of military hardware I'd expect to see the Gunners running around with, while there were quite a few Institute made magical energy weapons too.

Strung from the rafters of this room was a grisly sight that helped figure it out. A long ribbon of wire was torn from the dead lighting and draped through the room, hung from it was a long daisy chain of lopped off pony ears and griffon claws. The disturbing party streamer was some kind of... of trophy...

The sense of pride I could feel flowing off the Shroud's spirit while I gaped at the disgusting prize made me angry, like really me angry, not it. It was happy with what it had been up to, the grisly string of severed parts just physical proof of what it had been doing with my body. What I'D been doing...

I snorted angrily and tore the string of ears and claws down, flapping back up to my pile of remaining possessions and wrestling my way into my stained trenchcoat and saddlebags. I still wasn't sure what to do or where to go, all I knew was I didn't want to keep hiding in the Shroud's disgusting lair one minute longer. I ignored its questioning voice and flew down to the main doors of the hospital, storming out into the chilly swirl of cold wind and snow when they flew open and I stalked out into the ruins.

Manebridge had become even more wrecked and blasted since the last time I'd been this way, drastic changes to the geography I slowly took in as I trudged down the scorched and broken streets. I had to step over several large melted and broken trenches that had been blasted through the streets in wavering lines from above, scanning the skyline of Trotson across the river and nearer buildings, I saw several had fresh looking holes blown through their walls or had fallen completely.

It had snowed at some point during the last week, the first full blown snow of winter that stuck to the dead trees and shattered buildings. It helped mask some of the devastating damage that had been done anyway, crunching under my hooves as I stayed on the ground and struck out in a random direction. Anywhere that was away from Kindle Hospital.

"I don't know, alright!? I just needed some fresh air! Quit asking me what to do like I have a clue! You think of something for once!"

I paused beneath a leaning streetlight hanging over the intersection of low suburban buildings, blearily looking up on realizing half of a two story brick general store had been incinterated recently. It was just a pile of blackened brick as soon as it moved away from the corner, the ground still crackling with ashes and the yellowed bricks nearest the obvious point of impact actually melted.

Plastered to the remaining wall on top of ancient Ministry of Morale posters showing a grinning Pinkie Pie FOREVER, I felt my eyes glowing on the newer advertisement standing out thanks to its vibrant and newly printed colors. 'Help Bring a New Dawn to Equestria!' was written in glittering golden font, above an image of Princess Celestia standing straight and proud with her lavender eyes looking up to the distant horizon. Her pale wings were flared and she wore a beautiful white and gold accented suit of A-01 power armor, trimmed in rubies and filigreed metal work.

I scowled at the poster and the hiss of 'Be Dark...' speaking up on looking it over, turning away to the wilderness outside the ruins and grumbling to myself. "That's all you can come up with on your own, huh? Kill the fake Celestia? Why haven't you yet then?"

"Yeah, well... I'm not interested. Let somepony else deal with it. It's not even the real Celestia, just some synth like... it doesn't matter..."

A sickly sweet scent hit my nose as I put the denser ruins behind me, drawing my eye up to the snow laden trees and gulping at the macabre scene laid out in the branches. Dozens of Gunners had been strung up from the skeletal limbs, skewered like marshmellows on a stick, speared through their green combat armor with splintered branches. They were arranged somewhat artistically, some hanging from dangling power lines and ropes like some bizarre kind of baby mobile.

All of their heads were missing...

I gulped as I took a few steps closer, drawn closer by the fluttering scrap of paper pinned to the trunk of the tree by a severed griffon's claw. An old Shrouded Stallion radio show ad, bits of red painted text sloppily applied at the borders of the mostly black image reading; 'Public Enemy Number 1 - EXTREMELY DANGEROUS!'

"So they've been hunting me... and you've been hunting them? That's what you've been doing? Why!? And what the hell have you done with their heads!?"

Feeling my head turning against my will, I found my eyes drawn to the river dropping away to the south and the ruins of Trotson behind it. The low shape of Diamond City was easy to pick out with the newly added glowing green shield peeking out from behind the brownstones and shops around it, becoming an actual great green jewel glimmering in the cloudy day. I could just picture the Shroud collecting Gunner heads and lobbing them all that way gleefully, that and morbid little displays like this one meant to inspire terror in the Gunners serving the Institute.

I still felt queasy looking back up to all the corpses, but started yanking saddlebags and loose gear down absently. The Shroud hadn't been looting ammo since it didn't know what to do with it. At least nopony else looked to have gone graverobbing, the brittle and half frozen corpses yielding a few goodies I tucked away as I focused on other gear.

One of the ponies had a faded brown and red saddleblanket I pulled free, trying to ignore the brittle crunching of frozen blood making it conform to his back even when I yanked it loose. I had to stomp and beat it back into flexibility, wrapping it around my wings and shoulders while I found a hoof knitted green and white scarf and a dark blue sock hat to go along with it.

I wasn't exactly cold, though it was chilly. Bundling up was more of a disguise than anything though. If the Gunners were out looking for me, no reason to just blunder around in my distinctive comic book costume and invite trouble. That still left me unsure what to do, wrapping my new winter clothes around me tightly and staring up at the drifting flurries.

The land rose as it went north from Manebridge, letting me look over the college town and think as I trotted in a slow circle. Going anywhere near Diamond City seemed like a bad idea in general. The tarnished dome of the C.I.A.T. ruins wasn't far away, but probably not a good direction either. The Institute had come out of hiding behind their fake Celestia, if they weren't setting up stuff on the surface there, they were still probably watching it.

The Manebridge Police HQ Paladin Dance and Summer once occupied was nearby, the glimmer of shining steel showing a Vertibuck landed on the rooftop pad proved the Brotherhood of Friendship was still in the area anyway. I wasn't too sure about going to them either though. While I really doubted Elder Macson and his troops were taken in by the Institute's synth Celestia, I also wasn't sure how happy they'd be to see me. I was another Institute tainted experiment of arcane science gone wrong after all.

Turning to the north, I looked northwest longingly. Hexington was that way... Sunshine and Rainbows Co-Op, the Applenathy Farm, and beyond them both... Sanctuary...

"N-No... She's probably not there anyway. Besides, I don't trust you around all our friends there...'

"You say that, until somepony pisses you off... Even if Jade's sisters aren't still watching the place, we can bet the Gunners and Institute are. I can't go back there, I just... c-can't..."

I facehoofed at the needy growl making my mane itch as I muttered back. "I'm not finding them for you either. I don't care if you're horny... Though honestly, if you're this frisky at least I doubt you've been murdering and raping, so thanks for small favors."

"Oh? Did I offend you Mr. Insane Cannibal Murderer? Luna commanded you against it, huh? Something that really ticked her off like slavery I'm guessing? Good. Must have been in one of those stories we haven't read yet, I'll have to find it and read it to..."

I froze while talking to myself in the middle of the half buried country road leading away from Manebridge, biting my trembling lip as it hit me again. No more bedtime stories for Glitter...

I sniffled as my head was lifted up from sagging to the street in misery, my view dragged to the northeast and the strange pull I felt that way. The Shroud wanted something in that direction and was trying to tempt me into going. I also got the bizarre feeling of it... worrying over me... It was very strange, like a huge dragon pausing to prance in place and fret over some pony it had stepped on while rampaging through a village. Caring was not something 'Be Dark...' did very well, but it was trying in its weird way. Having a direction to go was something at least, so I sighed and started tromping through the snow that way.

"Whatever... If we're alone, it's not like I have anything better to do. If you want something over there, why haven't you just gone to get it already though?"

I almost laughed at the evasiveness in its eventual reply, feeling the spirit pouting back at me chuckling tiredly. It was chattier and had more of a vocabulary now that its prison was gone, but was still simple and direct, as much information coming from feelings it shared than what it actually said.

"Ha! You were enjoying yourself too much and didn't even think of it, did you? Yeah, you need me alright. You would have just kept right on throwing yourself at Celestia over and over for the hell of it if I hadn't come back. I interrupted your fun, now you have to actually think of something."

"Fine, fine... let's go then. At least it's mostly wilderness that way, getting you away from anywhere populated where you can cause more trouble is probably a good idea. Jade and the others know how to find us, if they haven't yet, then they have a good reason."

I idly wondered about that and was sorely tempted again to start bringing up locator tags, just to know.... Figuring out the Shroud couldn't access that information without me helped steel my resolve though. It couldn't find Jade without me showing it how, meaning she was safe so long as I resisted temptation. If she hadn't come to find me yet then...

Maybe she didn't want to.

Northeast it was then. Away from Diamond City and the Institute, away from Sanctuary and home, just away...

Location Discovered: Drumline Diner

Staring past the blinking text in my vision from my hiding spot in nearby snow covered bushes and fallen trees, I eyed the rusty old diner in the clearing ahead warily. A few green dashes on E.F.S. matched the shadows I could spot through the clouded windows that weren't boarded up, while a bored looking brahmim was hitched to an old green Trotson Sanitation cart out front that was overloaded with a teetering pile of junk. A small shack of scavenged scrap was built around the back, the soft clucking noises of the chickencoop that way promising eggs and more meat being served inside.

What really had my interest was the radhog roasting on a spit over a carefully managed fire outside, the smell of cooking meat making my fangs twinge out and stomach grumble. The scent mixing with the steady trickle of smoke coming from the wasteland era chimney added to the diner's roof just made it more tempting, savory smells of food... real food... Even a hint of fried apple that made me drool into the new scruffy beard of fur on my chin I found myself scratching absently.

"Be quiet... I don't want to hear anything from you about food. Period."

"No eating ponies!! Just... behave yourself, alright? I'm going in there to get something to eat that didn't have a freaking cutie mark. Maybe talk to somepony who isn't an insane ancient spirit that can't figure out bottlecaps. See if I can figure out what's been happening for the last damn week or so. We're going to go in, keep our head down and our ears open, that's it. Let me handle it and try not to murder anyone...."

An annoyed and petulant huff answered as I crept out to the cracked parking lot, but the Shroud let me take the lead without fighting over it. Just from what it had demonstrated since I'd woken up, it didn't seem to need to go back to sleep and it could exert some control over my body even with me in it and in the light of day, so this was a risk. Still, these were the first living ponies I'd run into so far, they had a fire, food and shelter from the increasing snowfall. I'd just mind my own business and stay in disguise, I needed more information and couldn't pass up the opportunity.

The ruins this far north of Manebridge were sparse, the woods overgrowing and tearing down most of the isolated little cabins and clusters of small town businesses. The small diner was an island in all the silence, the roads leading to it and the crumbling parking lot still mostly clear of dirt, vegetation and even snow, which had been shoveled clear of paths leading to the door and heaped near the edges of the property like barricades.

Coming up to the flaking red metal and glass door with its faded sign turned to 'OPEN', I looked over the modular construction wistfully and pushed the door open with a sad jingle of a bell overhead. Inside the nostalgia smacked me even more forcefully, red and pink tiled floors, chrome and formica countertops and tables, cracked red leather stools and booths... It reminded me of the Stable cafeteria back home, the kitchy prewar decor for greasy spoons an Equestria-wide standard apparently.

It was dirty of course, but fairly well tended. Candles lit the interior in flickering light and a large woodburning stove had been crudely bolted to the pitted pink prewar oven and griddle, providing heat to the small diner with a smoky haze hanging in the air.

I froze standing in the open doorway at the curious looks all turning to me, gulping at the older mare behind the counter turning from flipping a series of flapjacks on the griddle to raise an eyebrow and snort. "In or out! Lettin' all the heat out buddy!"

"Oh! Er... s-sorry..."

I pranced away and let the door swing shut with snowflakes swirling at my hooves, looking around the small room as the others stopped staring at me for standing there like an idiot with it open. I didn't feel the stinging cold nearly so much, but from the grumbles and shivers I caught from the other customers tugging their coats tighter, that was the biggest thing on their minds.

At least there weren't many people here. I shied away from the pair of bedraggled Minutemares in a corner booth rubbing their hooves together at the plates of flapjacks the cook trotted out with. An earth pony buck and unicorn filly wearing the uniforms that had been augmented with scarves, boots, earmuffs and padded winter coats under the tan dusters.

A couple booths over from them was a single faded blue earth pony mare with a dirty yellow mane. She was dressed in layers of rags and tattered wasteland winter gear topped with a ragged denim coat, festooned with pockets, pieces of leather armor studded with scrap metal and bits of junk tied decoratively in her mane. Her lined was face filthy and weather worn, her cracked hooves showing signs of a pony who traveled the trails a lot. Probably the owner of the trader's wagon outside then.

A skinny and sweaty looking earth pony colt a few years younger than me swept the floors on the opposite side of the room, his bloodshot yellow eyes darting between myself and the Minutemares, but anxious and never holding still long. He looked and smelled awful, a sour reek coming with the sweat on his dingy caramel coat that made me think he was sick somehow.

Being careful not to use my wings, I clambered my way up to the last stool at the counter, away from the Minutemares first and the buck second. The older mare returned while I was squinting up to the cracked chalkboard that had been hung over top of the prewar menus on the wall, unobtrusively trying to tap at my pip-buck under the counter and relieved to see that yes, I did actually still have some caps on me.

"What'll it be kid? Run a small shop if you're lookin' for any supplies, or you can ask Trashcart Carla when she's done. Otherwise order some food or hit the road pal, not offerin' free heat and ambiance, bathroom's for payin' customers too." The older mare leaned up on the counter with her foreleg before me with a bored drawl, but did offer a smirk at her joke and seemed friendly enough.

"C-Coffee... Just coffee to start. Umm... are those apple fritters I smell though?"

She blinked her aged amber eyes at me wiping the drool from my muzzle hopefully, turning back to her kitchens to check on a basket held in bubbling oil before answering. "Be done in just a minute, good nose on you kid! All the woodsmoke usually clogs things up too much to sniff em out, but better than freezing amiright? Name's Truly Delicious pal, I'll pull a couple out fresh in a second, lemme just get your coffee."

"Hey? Did you say some of your famous apple fritters are almost done Truly!? We want some too! Best part of our patrol this way, don't run out on us!" The Minutemare filly's ears perked up as the owner turned and started pouring from the glued together coffee pot on the counter behind her, getting a tired chuckle from the middle aged mare waving her anxious yelp away with her gold and ocher striped tail.

"Hush up, first come, first served. Sides, I always make sure to hold some back for my loyal customers. Have to keep you kids coming back to keep the bad element out, I know it's just my baking keeping this place going. Celesti... Er... Goddesses only know what we'd do without sweets to draw in idealistic foals like you two Private Pond." The rich orange earth pony Truly winked as she lowered her head, tilting to pour a steaming mug of coffee out to me gratefully counting caps.

I held the warm mug in my hooves and kept my eyes down, absently flicking my ears at the Minutemare buck snorting back proudly. "Her highness' Minutemares are there to protect the Commonwealth at a minute's notice, not the dinner bell ma'am. Though the food is great incentive to give 110%."

"I'm just teasin' Sgt. Bark, you know that. Better your Princess than that other one... bless her heart the poor dear." Truly answered with a soft smile as she started deftly flicking sizzling fritters out of the oil, the way the diner grew silent and somber at her mention of Jade just making me more panicked and curious.

"Princess... I-Is something wrong with her?"

I spoke in a hesitant whisper and kept focusing on my mug, but couldn't help giving a pitiful look up to the older mare cocking her head at me curiously. "Of course there is! Where you been, under a rock? Princess Jade has done so much for all of us and they... her poor little filly... her husband... everything they took from her and she can still forgive... She's a stronger mare than me, I'll tell you that! A real Princess!"

"I uh... h-haven't paid much attention to the news lately..."

My lame excuse didn't look like it flew with the frowning mare, jabbing a hoof to a cracked red radio on a shelf behind her putting out nothing but static. "Freakin' news has been out of commission! D.C. Radio is still off the air since all that nonsense."

"There's DJ Pon3 from Manehatten. Though they don't know much of what's going on here. I did hear they're already organzing some of those New Canterlot Rangers to come to the Commonwealth though." The trader mare spoke up from her booth, idly looking out the window as she munched away on a chipped bowl of scrambled eggs.

Dulcet's still on Radio Freedom too Truly. He's been trying to pick up the slack with Miles off the air." The pale Minutemare filly added her two bits, her wide green eyes never leaving the apple fritters Truly was stacking on a platter as she pulled them out.

"I'll keeping waiting for Miles thank you. It comes back in fits and starts sometimes and I've been listening to that buck on D.C. Radio since he was a little colt. All your Minutemare radio talks about is getting along, keeping the peace, blah, blah, blah. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad there hasn't been much fighting this way since the Midnight Sun, but I don't trust that Synthlestia one bit. For all her yapping about her 'New Dawn' nonsense, the big bitch roasts a good bit of the landscape every night and all the noise is getting old." Truly huffed and rolled her eyes, giving a warm smile when she set a plate with a pair of fritters before me.

"Peace? There uh... hasn't been fighting? What noise?"

Everypony in the small diner turned to me at that, giving incredulous looks that made me cringe and shrink on my stool. Truly ended the silence by sputtering loudly, planting her forelegs on the counter to lean up and snort. "There's not catching the news, then there's bein' dumb as a rock kid. Every night that fake goddess and the Shrouded Stallion are going at it, thunder and lightning, explosions, fires! You just didn't notice any of that either!?"

"Er... I umm... s-scavenge a lot... underground... It can be a few days before I see the sky between trips, so I must have... er... missed it? R-Really, I'm just curious... please?"

"Well... Do look like ya been rode hard and put up wet, I'll give you that. Guess you missed all the excitement in Diamond City then?" At my shaky nod, Truly sighed and glared out the southern windows, towards the distant shape of the great green jewel. "According to the big faker... The Institute wasn't reeeeeally a bunch of evil lunatics for the last 200 damn years, just poor, misunderstood geniuses who were manipulated by that Svengallop asshole don't you know. All the nasty shit they've done to us was just a big mistake! Whoopsie.... They brought Princess Celestia back, or made a synth of her, who the hell knows."

"DJ Pon3 says the real Celestia is still with the Lightbringer in Neighvaro. It's not her..." The trader spoke up in answer, relating the news she got from outside the Commonwealth with a suspicious grumble over the Institute's synth Princess.

"I heard the Brotherhood got sent here originally 'cause they found one of those synth spies sneaking in there. The squires I've talked to say they must have made a copy of her off the Crusader Maneframe thing, that's why it's so perfect." The Minutemare buck Sgt. Bark spoke in a measured tone, the stallion was a few years my senior and murmured thoughtfully before taking a big bite from one of Truly's freshy delivered fritters and grinning.

"It might look right and it might be able to raise the sun like her, but that thing ain't no Princess! Princess Jade is a real Princess for all us common ponies, that's why she was able to... to look out for us first, no matter how she feels after what they did." The younger Minutemare filly spoke up with a vehemence that made me like her, proudly defending Jade and disdaining the Institute's Celestia in one breath, tossing her pale green and blue striped mane spilling out from her Minutemare hat in a flowing cascade.

"No! Leave her alone!"

I blinked up from bashing my head hard enough to rattle my nearly empty mug, wincing sheepishly at the wary stares directed to the crazy looking and sounding murder hobo sitting in their midst. Truly raised an eyebrow at the outburst, but must get all kinds in her little diner, shrugging when I didn't do anything else particularly insane and moving to refill my coffee with a soft sigh.

"That must be what her highness wanted, to be left alone... If they'd replaced and tortured even my useless son like they did her filly, I think I'd be right out there with her husband slaughtering them all instead of making peace. The Institute is evil, they made that poor girl a synth and tried to make her kill her poppa Mister, the Shrouded Stallion. Since then, Sanctuary's been at peace with the liars, but he's been going at them every night. Far as I'm concerned he's right too, whatever they get is too good for them." Truly stamped her hooves and scowled, pointing to the buck sweeping the floors flinching under her ire.

Glitter... I slumped in my seat thinking of her again, mechanically chewing the admitedly delicious apple fritter and feeling it turn to ashes in my mouth. Everycreature knew what they did to her, what she was... what she had always been...

"The Gunners aren't attacking settlements anymore though Truly, the Minutemares and Followers are allowed to travel and help those who need it, accepting Synthlestia's truce has saved a lot of suffering for regular folks. Of course Princess Jade would put the people of the Commonwealth first. Going crazy and trying for revenge would just hurt more innocent ponies, keep up the cycle of pain and hate..." Sgt. Bark spoke in that world weary and wise tone of his that just looked to annoy his private, meeting her scowling snort placidly.

"T-That's why she has her knight to go after the ones who hurt her foal for her. Of course the Princess is great and kind and forgiving, but the General is out there making them pay! Like he should!" The Minutemare filly Pvt. Pond puffed her chest up and whinnied proudly, only adding to my appreciation for the pretty young mare defending me.

While I was still flinching from the Shroud giving another frisky growl in my head, the older buck with her spoke up in a soothing and slow voice, trying to speak logically and let her down gently from her emotional response. "The General lost his mind Private... Understandable after what they did to his filly, but he's not acting as her knight or a hero anymore. That's why we're trying to shoo everycreature out of the danger zone before nightfall, remember? Which is why you might want to get back underground or clear the area stranger, it's not safe around here. Or did you forget that newest display we found that made you toss your cookies all over my boots Private?"

"T-They were Gunners sir!! They deserved it!" His private wailed back, but the older buck was undeterred.

Sipping his coffee lazily at her outburst, Sgt. Bark pulled out a battered old Trotson Library book and barely glanced over its pages as he replied. "That group of scavvers we pulled out of the wrecked apartment building across the river? Did they deserve it too Private?"

"T-That... that wasn't the General's fault! He couldn't have known anypony was inside! Half the block was destroyed! That synth bitch was the one who..." Pvt. Pond shouted back, but her defense shriveled up as her green eyes grew misty in memory.

"Those two fighting causes a lot of collateral damage, yes Private. Between their nightly brawls and the Brotherhood's resistance, there are a lot of innocent creatures that can get caught up in the destruction. The real General would do everything he could to prevent that, just like the Princess wants. I don't like it either Still, I believed in the General too and I understand why he lost it. Sometimes heroes fall... The wasteland wears everything down eventually. They can die a hero or live long enough to become the villain, but nopony beats the Dealer in the end." Sgt. Bark gave a sad, tired shrug to the teary eyed and frowning filly with him, scratching his bristly cheek tiredly as she whimpered.

"B-But... He was my hero too. It's not fair sir, it's not right... We know he's out there and they're hunting him every night, but we're just supposed to sit on our hooves and let them!? To give up on him? To let all the bad ponies win!?" Pvt. Pond's voice cracked, the anger still there, but fading miserably as she pleaded with the older buck.

"Sometimes they do Private... I know the good guys always win in those comic books you think are the General's biography, but I keep trying to get you to try grown up books for a reason. Life's just not that simple, sometimes it's messy and unsatisfying, sometimes we have to hold our nose and do what's best out of a lot of bad options. The Princess knows that... That's why she agreed to their truce, that's why she asked her loyal troops to go out and save lives, and that's why we're focusing on what we can do to help, not on stuff that's way above our pay grade." Sgt. Bark adjusted his Minutemare hat and laid a comforting hoof on the younger filly's shaking one across the table, a sad smile playing across his features as I shrank into my seat further.

Innocents... Innocent ponies had been getting hurt, because of me. The Shroud had been mindlessly throwing itself at Celestia every night and people were suffering from the destruction left in its wake. Even now I could feel it muttering defensively, still proud and angry, self assured and intent on continuing its idiotic course of action had I not woken up.

"All any of us can do I suppose, focus on what we can do and making things better, no matter how bad they get. Just like one lazy buck should be focusing on doing a better damn job sweeping up considering how pissed off I still am at him!" Truly sighed into the hush that had fallen on the diner, turning to the younger buck listlessly still sweeping the same corner he had been this entire time and flinging an apple core his way with a screech that did help break the somber mood.

"I'm tryin' ma, I'm tryin! Just listening is all! A-And tired... I really don't feel good, can't I..." The skinny colt yelped back as he ducked, pouting sullenly to the chuckles filling the diner.

"Lyin', theivin', drug addicted little bucks don't get to talk back Hat Trick! You're still paying off what you filched from the register so don't even think of whining about withdrawls until that floor is spotless!" Truly glared at her son scampering off to sweep a new spot, rolling her eyes when she turned my way to scoop up the pile of caps I'd laid out. "Stories about big damn heroes and Princesses don't have a lot of bearing on our lives I guess, always got our own problems to deal with, right mister? Be glad you don't have any kids complicatin' yours at least young buck!"

"I... did...."

"Oh... Oh I'm sorry young feller. So much for joking around... just thought you were young enough it was a safe one. It never stops being a cruel ol' wasteland, for important Princesses and plain old ponies like us alike. He's a damn fool and an addict, but I don't know what I'd do if I lost my colt." Truly's amber eyes grew sad and soft at my croak of an answer, fidgeting with her golden mane as I lowered my chin to the counter miserably.

"W-We love them... no matter what they are."

"That we do. That never goes away." The older mare gave me a sad, supportive smile and patted my tattered sock hat, her tail winding behind her to wrap around her spatula and deftly flick another apple fritter over her back and to my plate with a wink. "On the house..."

Sniffling sadly and grateful to the mare trotting away to check on her other customers giving me space, I stretched my tongue forward lazily and dragged bites off the gift without lifting my head. It all felt so heavy and I was so tired and hurt... Finding out a few things had been helpful, but it all led back to the same place eventually. Glitter was gone and nothing seemed to matter without her...

I sat there awhile like that, picking at my food and coffee unenthusiastically and letting the subtle flow of other ponies voices wash over me. Truly's sympathy kept me mostly out of the conversation and left alone, of course the occassional muttering to myself in schizophrenic conversation probably helped too. I was just one more crazy wastelander with my own sad story, nothing that remarkable, good or bad.

Trying to think productively was pretty much useless. The grief and pain I still felt made it all seem pointless. The Shroud even tried cheering me, in its bizarre and psychotic fashion anyway. Having a chatty spirit in your head jabbering away about finding somepony to kill or punish wasn't helping though. It felt sad... or maybe it just felt my sadness, but the Shroud's answer to basically everything was kill it. Pointless anger rising up as an alternative to pointless misery that just made me exhausted.

It was while silently trying to explain that no, skinning a few Gunners alive wouldn't make me feel better about Glitter, that a sudden crackle and burst of static from the radio got everypony's attention. I didn't add to the resounding cheers that rang out at the familiar voices hissing out of the speaker, but I did look up longingly on hearing old friends.

"Is it working Maggie?"

"I don't know Miles, the building has never spoken to us before... How would I tell?"

"The radio, check it and see if..."

"Ah! I hear it! Us... I think so Miles! It is back on the air, hmm why does it sound like that though? It's all echo-y and..."

"I told you all it came back sometimes! There's my favorite DJ! He's got that special somepony of his with him again too! One of the Princess' sisters you know! I knew today would be a good day!" Truly practically bounced behind the counter, laying her ears back with all of us at the loud whine of feedback making her poor radio warble.

The D.C. Radio signal seemed weaker than normal, a fact I absently confirmed by checking my pip-buck's radio dial when the message announcing its return faded from view; 'Diamond City Radio Signal Detected'. Looking over the map focusing on the source, I blinked in confusion a moment on finding the icon of three curved lines in a fan now displayed not over Diamond City, but to the east, on top of Trinity Tower's icon.

Hearing Magnolia with him, I gave a half hearted smile thinking of the two of them together in her home. I wasn't sure why Miles' radio station had been off the air and apparently moved to the Trotson M.A.S. hub, but he must have gotten Umbra to allow him in and to get it up and running again. Considering how the alicorns living there had decided they wanted the pegasus buck to take their compatibility potion and make with the mating, he had to be a little uncomfortable at the moment.

The thought just led to memories of our own visit to Jade's sisters though... Of meeting them all, running in to Swan for the first time, arguing with Umbra, running away when I turned into exactly what they wanted. Of Glitter so excited to meet all her 'aunts' and befriending the strange fillies so effortlessly... of her puffing her little chest out in Umbra's looming shadow and telling the intimidating leader of the alicorns Jade was her mother... It all made me feel sad and nostalgic for those days, though 'Be Dark...' had perked right up and focused solely on a whole tower full of pretty alicorn fillies just waiting...

"Nnngh... sshh!! Be quiet! I'm not going there!"

I groaned and fought with my wings under the saddleblanket trying to twitch up, cringing at everypony warily looking over at my sudden, nonsequiter shout to nopony. Thankfully, the whining noise from the radio cut out and Truly turned it back up immediately, ignoring her slightly addled customer in favor of Miles returning to the airwaves.

"Ow! Damn, turn your pip-buck down a little hon, feedback. Just a minute... Er, let's just try playing some music for now and I'll keep working on it."

"Which song? One of the regular playlists or..."

"Umm... t-that new one you wrote. Your sister really liked it. If he's out there, I... I b-bet he'd like to hear it too."

"Oh.... Y-Yes, of course... I would like singing that, f-for them both..."

"Haven't heard this song before! I wonder if she wrote it for..." Truly had broke into a wide grin at the catchy song filling the diner, but froze on seeing me shuddering on my stool, hiding under my hooves and trying to bawl silently in shame. "Oh... Oh buddy, hey there... don't cry... I-It's a good song, good music makes ponies feel, that's all. It's ok... you wanna talk about it kid? It must have happened not long ago if you're... t-talking helps you know. I can lend an ear anyway and... Aw hell, what's all this nonsense now? H-Hang on just a minute kid. Hey! I see you lurking out there you hooligans!"

Looking up through the tears to her kind amber eyes before they focused over my head and out the windows, the nice mare scowled and patted my back as she passed by the counter and shouted out to the snowy parking lot. Whatever it was out there, I didn't really care, squinting against the directionless anger welling up at feeling Magnolia's song touching my heart. It was like she wrote it for me... for Glitter... for the only other pony I actually did want to talk to...

Jade... She had to be in pain too, somewhere... alone...

I couldn't be with the mare I loved and console each other, because the storm in my head was still raging and it wasn't safe. I could feel it up there, getting angrier and ready to lash out at anything to make the hurting stop. Gritting my teeth and shaking as I felt it raging against the sweet notes and voice from the radio, I saw my plate and mug on the counter in front of me rattling in place, the shadow of my head on the counter falling across them swirling and getting darker than the diffuse daylight could account for.

The gruff shouts and cruel laughter from outside gave 'Be Dark...' something to eagerly turn its attention to while I fought it, the familiar, sadistic tones and teasing I'd heard from too many raiders answering Truly's shout. "Oy! Send your buck out old lady! He owes me caps and I'm here to collect!"

Poking her head and a double barreled shotgun out the battered door, Truly yelled back as the pair of Minutemares scrambled from their seat and dug out their hoof cranked magical energy muskets behind her. "Piss off! Hat trick is grounded and we reserve the right to refuse service to drug dealing assholes! You got all the caps you're stealing from my place from him already! Scat!"

A gaggle of leather armor wearing raiders of some kind were spreading out around the diner outside. The one speaking was a big earth pony in a studded leather jacket over his dirty red hide, his dark violet mane buzzed down close to the scalp and a hunting rifle battlesaddle on his flank pointing at Truly. I caught the younger buck Hat Trick diving to hide behind the counter with a guilty look and half turned to look over Truly's spread legged stance. She was protecting her foal...

"Suggest you do what the mare says Wolf Fang... The Minutemares are willing to look the other way when it comes to ponies like yourself, so long as you don't cross the line into raider territory. Drumline Diner is part of the Kingdom of Sanctuary and under our protection though." Sgt. Bark drawled out a window to the tense standoff, keeping his sedate tone and trying to defuse things admirably.

The smarmy prick outside seemed ready for him though, shrugging and holding his hooves out like he was just a reasonable pony. "That's hardly fair Minutemare. We sold her brat there a product he wanted and were promised payment. The ponies in blue going to just let him get away with stealing from us? We're not raiders, just legitimate business ponies. We won't kill him, just rough him up a little bit if his momma won't pay. That's fair."

"You're not touching my colt! Legitimate business ponies my ass! You got him hooked on your poison, convinced him to steal from his family to pay! If you think you're hurting my foal and I'll just let you, you're dumber than you look Wolf!" Truly raged back, drawing a bead on the smirking stallion's head with her shotgun.

The chorus playing on the radio kept hammering into my head while this was all going on around me a million miles away, now the plates, silverware, salt shakers and dinged chrome napkin holders on the counter were all shaking, the assorted pictures and cooking implements on the walls rattling in place as I tried to stay where I was. Truly was a nice mare, she was kind and loved her son... Like I loved Glitter. If some assholes came saying they were going to hurt her, I wouldn't care if it was her fault or not. I didn't care she'd been a synth either. She was MINE... My little filly... my precious daughter...

"Truly... if he stole, they are entitled to some kind of justice under the Kingdom's laws. Can't he give back the drugs?" The older Minutemare frowned in thought at the glorified raider's demands, in a sticky position and trying to find a way out peacefully.

Truly huffed back without turning away from the crew of drug dealers outside. "I flushed what the damn fool didn't take already!"

"Caps then? Pay him back for what he stole and nopony gets hurt. I'll chip in my own even, we can see about getting him help with his addicition from the Followers too." Sgt. Bark pleaded with the furious mare, digging in his own pockets for caps to stop things from getting worse, despite the snort from his private objecting.

"I'm not paying them a damn thing! Think I'm gonna reward those assholes for making my baby sick on their junk!? NEVER!" Truly stamped her hooves and screamed back, finally turning from the door in her fury.

As soon as she did, a whining shot broke the glass at the bottom of the door, clipping the older mare's hoof stuck out the threshold with a pained yell. The stallion who'd fired had that stupid smirk on his face still, shrugging to the Minutemares powering up their weapons with a hoof cranked hum and crackle of magic. "That was a warning shot... Pay us what we're owed or give us the buck for a few minutes, but either way, we're going to..."

That was as far as he got. Truly's son had dashed out at his mother's cry, dragging her away from the door and jabbering about going outside to give himself up. The Minutemares had dug in and prepared for a firefight, while the trader mare had wisely ducked under her table and waited. The moment stretched out as soon as I heard the mother's cry though, time slowing down as I just let go.

The shadows swirling around me and getting darker hadn't been noticed with all the activity outside, but now they deepend to an inky, oily black that contracted around me and exploded outwards with a guttural roar. The small diner was bathed in absolute darkness that took away any follow up shot the raiders might have had and the windows blew out around the door.

A roiling cloud of shadows and shards of glass flew out and crashed down on the surprised drug dealer, gaping up to the approaching wave of death with a shrill scream that turned to a horrible gurgle. I'd teleported... Sort of? It felt like swiming in the shadows that swirled and rippled around me as I reappeared outside, standing on top of the shredded buck that had been torn to ribbons by all the glass, barely twitching under me as he bled into a widening puddle of red snow at my hooves. My wings were flared and my eyes were glowing, bits of my crude disguise fluttering away in the howling wind that swirled around me in a miniature cyclone.

"O-O-Oh FUCK! I-It's the Shroud! RUN!!!" One of the drug dealer's henchponies turned white as a sheet, her pale blue eyes turning to tiny dots when my head snapped her direction and my fangs extended into a disturbingly cheery grin.

She made it three steps before I caught up to her in an electric flicker racing across the snowy lot. I stretched my muzzle out and savored the last look she gave over her withers as her flowing pink and red tail was chomped on for grip, then I reared back and yanked, flinging her over my head like a rag doll and bringing her down face first on a half snow covered fire hydrant with a sickening crunch.

Her hindlegs were still twitching when I spit her tail out, but the mound of snow around the flaking red hydrant was quickly stained with too much blood to think she actually survived. A string of wild light caliber rounds impacting my armored coat drew my attention from watching with detatched indifference anway, turning to spot another pair of terrified raiders cowering in a rusty old bread wagon near the exit to the parking lot.

A layer of inky black overglow lit my horn and the corrupted blue magic surrounded the whole prewar vehicle, crushing it under a ripple of unfamiliar gravity magic that distorted the air and pinned the raiders down flat on their bellies in the bed of the wagon. The snow and asphalt in a circle around it buckled and sank several inches, while the wagon itself groaned and squealed as the metal was bent and crumpled around them.

All they could do was scream and scream... a noise that finally drowned out that repeating chorus of Magnolia's sweet song and the annoying whines of the Ministry Mares. Something that made me feel anything other than sadness, even though tears were still flowing down my cheeks when I flicked my horn and sent the balled up wreck rocketing into the sky. I swatted my stupid sock hat aside just to perk my ears and listen to those wails of terror fading as they went sailing towards the river, putting my fedora in its place while I grimly watched them hit the water and sink to a watery grave.

My heightened hearing drew my attention back down at the noise of breaking branches and snow crunching getting further away in a mad dash. The last two raiders had run for it, probably from the word go judging by the distance they'd managed. I felt my legs tense and magic flicker getting ready to go after them, but merely grunted and drew my cleaned revolver with a tired sigh.

"Just let me... Guns have their uses."

I saw the spurt of blood and brains go flipping off the skull of the first as they crested a rise and he collapsed. The second screamed at a distant, meaty thud of the last round sending her spinning on her hooves and tumbling to the other side of the hill. I heard limping, uneven movement echoing back, but once she was out of sight I didn't particularly care about killing her and neither did the Shroud. The grim chuckle it gave over the merits of 'leaving one alive' enough explanation for me.

I shook the spent casings out as I strolled back to the bloody stain on the snow where their leader was still gurgling, pacing around him with my head down and nostrils flaring at the heady scent of fear and blood. His fading eyes followed me and he shivered, but he couldn't get away and wasn't going to live much longer. Watching him suffer just... made me hurt less.

"You picked a really bad day to pick on a mother and her child..."

I leaned in to his face and growled, keeping pace one stalking step at a time as he struggled to crawl on his back to get away. I wanted to watch the light fade from his eyes, see that last little spark of resistance fizzle out and give way to the despair I felt every time I thought of my poor filly. If I had to hurt, everypony else who deserved it should too.

"F-F-Fu-c-ck... y-yo..." The big earth pony managed to gurgle out one final bit of defiance, hacking and snorting to spit in my face instead of giving in like I wanted.

Before he could, I dove forward and felt my fangs crunch down on his muzzle, tearing away flesh and cartilidge in a grisly spray as he drowned on his own bloody screams. I just closed my eyes and gave in, feeling my teeth gnashing away as I ripped his stupid face off with disgusting smacks and snorts of pleasure from the Shroud running things when I retreated.

"I-It's really you... isn't it sir?" I looked up and spun at the quavering voice speaking up behind me, watching the younger Minutemare filly turning green when I faced her with bits of gore coating my muzzle and a hunk of meat swinging her way from my teeth falling to the ground when I licked my chops. "O-Oh goddesses... G-General sir..."

"Private... Get away from him..." Her superior pulled the shivering filly back to the diner's broken door, still keeping up his calm demeanor as he put himself up front and center and eyed me like a hellhound, trying to keep my attention away from the others peeking out of the shattered windows with dumbstruck, horrified looks at the bloodbath outside. "General sir, you're not well... I know you're still in there sir, you sat with us all this time without... You heard us talking so you know we understand. I'm... We're all s-sorry about your daughter sir."

"T-ThEy toOk hEr aWaY..."

I was still crying as I groaned back, at least managing to spit out what I still had in my mouth and looking away in shame. It was Truly's voice that got me to look back, the middle aged mare shoving Sgt. Bark aside to limp out into the snow on her bandaged foreleg. She looked like a pony trying to muster up the courage to go have a chat with a dragon, but I saw pity in her warm amber eyes and she spoke in the soothing coo of a good mother.

"Like they were going to take my buck... I know... T-Thank you for that youngster. You helped us, n-now let me help you. C-Come on back inside here, alright? It'll be ok... we'll get you back to your Princess, neither of you should be alone dear..."

She really was a kind mare... and brave. I could smell the fear coming off her and all the others, the trader mare and her son both darting panicked glances her way when she invited the monster back inside with them. Looking between them, I sniffled as I turned back to the nice mare who made such good apple fritters. I really missed my mom...

"NoT sAfE... ThAnK yOu, b-but it's not safe, I'm not safe... for anypony. I'm... I'm sorry...."

One hard flap sent me rocketing up with the snow swirling in my wake, putting the warm little diner and cluster of ponies behind me. I turned east and climbed for the cloudy skies, running away and hiding again. Just to hear anything other than my own sniveling, I blindly turned my pip-buck's radio on and let the end of Magnolia's song follow me through the snowy skies.

New Perk Added!----------------

Cannibal---------
---It may not be a perk you picked, but with the Cannibal perk you gain the option to feast on mortal flesh to heal your wounds! Eating pony corpses restores Health, but every time you feed, you lose Karma, and if the act is witnessed, it is considered a crime against nature.