They were in a rush, but Star Gazer never let the little things distract him from juicy conversation.

“Yowza. Did your aunt blow a gasket after you trashed the party like that?”

As they approached a street corner, Blueblood raised a hoof. The small band screeched to a halt behind him. He peered around the side of the building – good, nopony to be seen. Strange for noontime in Canterlot, but this was a strange day. With a quick gesture of his head, he waved the group on.

“Not really,” he mused, casting his mind back to less frantic times. “Aunt Celly tried to scold me, but she kept cracking up and prying for gossip. You know, ‘did you REALLY threaten to exile Gem?’ and all that. I think my flipping out back there surprised even her.”

“Hey, it was for a good cause.” Star Gazer gave a quick smile to the third member of their little party. Ditzy smiled back and blushed a little, embarrassed by the memory. Their fourth, Helperton, was trotting backwards behind them, eyeing the direction they had just come from.

“Darn right,” Blueblood grunted. “I was persona non grata for a while, but you know how that works. A scandal with Cadence’s dressmaker, a rumor about Luna, and it was all forgotten within a few weeks.”

His frown turned upward into a mean smile. “Well, maybe not ‘forgotten.’ For some reason, nopony’s said a bad word about Ditzy ever since.”

“Ha!” Star Gazer barked. The prince glared at him abruptly, causing the green pegasus to slap a hoof over his mouth. The group stopped in silence for a second, but the noise seemed to have gone unnoticed.

Star Gazer rolled his eyes. “Quiet, Schmiet. I still say nopony’s going to hear us over all the explosions.”

Blueblood’s glare continued, voice deadpan. “We would dearly thank you to humor us and avoid loud noises.”

The pegasus snorted at the uncharacteristic use of the Royal We. He shook his head, grin still wide, but a little sadder. “I’m sure going to miss you when you move.”

“Step lively, youngsters!” Helperton abruptly sped past them. The other three knew what that meant, and they all began galloping after him.

The older earth pony slowed a bit, casting a glance behind him. “And what was that about you moving?”

“Sorry, still working through my ‘ponies to tell’ list.” Blueblood bashfully scratched the back of his head, the action nearly causing him to trip as they ran on. “See, being in love is wonderful, magical, and all that other mushy stuff. But with Ditzy living in Ponyville and me in Canterlot, it’s been a logistical nightmare. Chariots aren’t always available for me to go to her, and she can only come here occasionally because of work and Dinky and all that.”

One of Helpteron’s hooves was firmly spent keeping his top hat in place, but he seemed to run fine on three legs. “I see.”

“It was rough,” Ditzy admitted quietly.

Blueblood shrugged, grimacing wryly. “We adapted as best as we could. Anyway, one day my Aunts called me into the parlor. Aunt Celestia said she wants the Unicorn Royalty to get out more. She said the way to do this is to dispatch them as ‘royal advisors’ to various towns. By sheer coincidence I’m sure, she thinks that I’m the right stallion and Ponyville’s the right place for the test run. If construction goes as planned, my mansion there will be done by Hearth’s Warming.”

“Wow.” Helperton eyed his friend from beneath his bushy brows. “That’s-“

“-A transparent attempt by them to solve my problem for me, I know.” Blueblood cut in, rolling his eyes. “I called them on it, too. ‘I don’t need your pity!’ and all that.”

Star Gazer had taken the lead, but he eased back a few paces. “I didn’t catch this part. What happened?”

“Luna turned the Royal Canterlot Voice to the max,” Blueblood groaned. “’SHUT UP AND LET YOUR AUNTS DO SOMETHING NICE FOR YOU!’ Except loud enough to peel the wallpaper.”

Ditzy gently slapped his shoulder. “It’s okay to let ponies be nice to you.”

“I know, I’m just…stubborn, I guess.” After the poor impersonation of Luna’s shout, Blueblood didn’t have much breath left. He galloped steadily onwards, letting Star Gazer take the lead. The pegasus rounded another corner…then whipped back at lightning speed, urging them in a different direction. The group ducked down an alleyway, right into a dead end.

Star Gazer tapped the unyielding brick wall. “Hm. Kind of a moot point now, isn’t it, Blues?”

The prince took a deep breath and shrugged. “Yeah…”

“…because we’re about to be eaten by changelings.”

The horde had finally caught up with them. Dozens, if not hundreds of insectoid bodies barred their path. A sea of malevolent blue eyes stared at their cornered prey. There was no need to run now. They advanced slowly, relishing the coming feast.

Strangely, the four very different ponies all had the same expression. They were nervous, but also stoic. The fear and panic had come earlier, when Ditzy’s quiet visit had been erupted by the invasion. Maybe in their hearts, they had known there was no escape.

Blueblood took a gallant step in front of Ditzy, but she would have none of it. She stepped forward with him, keeping her body firmly pressed against his.

Helperton’s voice came up softly. “Here, lad – take my spare.”

The prince glanced to the side to see-

“WHAT IS THAT?!!”

“It’s a shotgun, Blues,” Helperton said drolly, balancing it on an outstretched hoof. “Only got two shots, so make ‘em count.”

With an incredulous look, the Prince levitated the metal construct up and glanced behind him. Star Gazer had fitted himself with a pair of brass horseshoes and was taking some test punches in the air. Helperton’s mouth was now carrying a wooden rod, attached to which was a short chain and spiked metal ball.

This was just too weird. “Where did you GET these?”

“Muh hat!” The blue pony responded with a full mouth, the glee behind it still apparent.

Blueblood rolled his eyes. There was no way all those random weapons could fit in Helperton’s modest black hat. “At least I’ll die befuddled,” he grumbled, cocking the weapon. It made a very satisfying Cha-CLAK noise that gave the horde pause for the barest of moments. But the menacing advance resumed, and right before his eyes, their forms began twisting…

Blueblood’s morale went straight to zero. He took a step back, stammering fearfully. “Changelings! Of course! Sweet Celly, they can just take the form of whatever hideous monster they want!”

He couldn’t look. He covered his eyes, willing them just to kill him quickly. What would he be mauled by? A manticore? A dragon? An ooze monster?

“Please nothing with tentacles,” he mewled, scrunching his eyes closed even tighter. He heard his three companions gasp at the fiends looming before them.

Star Gazer screamed. “OH MY GODDESS, it’s HORRIBLE!”

Blueblood gave a start, and his eyes shot open by instinct…

…To see hundreds of copies of himself, leering at him.

Adding insult to insult, they were all significantly overweight.

He glared angrily to the side, seeing Star Gazer breaking down into a fit of laughter. Even Ditzy and Helperton were chuckling a little.

“Shut up!” He shot, blushing fiercely and whipping around to the changelings. “And you! I am NOT that fat!”

The changelings resumed closing in on them. This time Blueblood took a solid step forwards and tapped his forehooves together. There was no way he could outfight them, but he was darn well gonna try. The other two stallions stepped up beside him, Star Gazer still chortling. “Heh…I’m so happy I could get in one more before we all get killed. Or whatever it is changelings do.”

‘Whatever’ indeed. The changelings would do whatever they wanted to the hapless ponies. Escape was cut off. There were far too many to fight. And it wasn’t like they could just fly away.

Blueblood blinked. Duh. “Ditzy, fly out of here!”

“What about me?” The other pegasus whined.

“Shut up – changelings can fly too, so all three of us need to distract them.”

“That ain’t fair at all,” Star Gazer grumbled. He shrugged and put on a wry smile, raising his brass-edged hooves. “Still, I can do it for a pretty girl.”

Ditzy, though, had very different plans. While the three stallions postured with their weapons, steeling themselves for a final stand, she had dashed forward. The prince gave a cry, but it all happened before he could react. His special somepony stood before the horde of bloated Bluebloods, standing upright, her forehooves stretched wide.

“Beware, I’m a magic pony!” She shouted. Her eyes were stretched even further apart than normal. Even her low voice made the whole thing seem like a joke. The changelings exchanged glances and snorted mean-spirited laughter.

“I mean it!” She shouted, drawing more scornful laughs. “I’m one of a kind! I bet none of you can copy me!”

Once more, the changelings exchanged glances. This time a ripple of shrugs emerged. Sure. If this stupid pony wanted to call them out, it would be kind of fun to crush her delusions before getting to the meal. There was no hurry.

The horde of Bluebloods dissolved and shrunk, each one taking the form of the lanky, short-nosed pegasus named Ditzy.

Complete with the eyes, googly to begin with and stretched as far apart as physically possible.

Their sneers turned to looks of shock and pain. The pulling of the eye muscles and distorted vision sent waves of vertigo through each brain. Cries and moans emerged and many fell to the ground – unable to concentrate, they were unable to change forms. More fell and they desperately closed their eyes, blotting out the splitting headache and slowly reverting back to their natural shapes. Even the quickest among them were dizzy afterwards from the sudden shifts in vision, but even the slowest needed only a few minutes to recover. Still, it was all the time the four ponies needed to make good their escape.

Secure in a new hiding place, Blueblood looked at his love with wide eyes. “How did you know they were going to do that?”

“Because I taunted them about it.” From out of nowhere, Ditzy produced a pair of sunglasses and put them on. Maybe she was trying to look awesome, but she just looked cute as ever to him.

“Punks shouldn’t derp if they can’t handle it,” she said, raising her nose in imitation of Blueblood’s arrogant gesture.

“You’re a bad influence on her,” Star Gazer tutted, smiling from ear to ear.

Blueblood softly touched his cheek to Ditzy’s neck. “I think we’re meeting each other halfway. Now everypony shut up – we’re laying low here until Princess Celestia saves the day.”

------

In the aftermath of the changeling attack…life went on.

It was an ordinary day in Ponyville. Not a Perfectly Ordinary Day, thank Celestia, as a few wild clouds had blown in from the Everfree Forest. But it was nothing the weather team couldn’t handle, and it was already bright and cheerful by the time the 10-minute bell rang for school.

One of the fillies gave her parents a quick, but passionate hug before dashing to the schoolhouse.

“Bye, Mom! Bye, Dad!” At the entrance, Dinky turned and gave a last wave before disappearing indoors.

Blueblood swallowed and tensed. He wasn’t sure if he would ever get used to being called…that. He always got this self-conscious crimp in his stomach whenever it came up.

His wife leaned against him, letting the prince support her full weight. Ditzy could sense his mood like nopony else.

She pushed her head up, nuzzling the underside of his chin. “You’re doing good. You’ve got the butterfliers, but I know you’ve got the warm-fuzzies too. You love her, she loves you, it’s all happy.”

“Yeah,” Blueblood admitted, smiling wryly. “I’ll treasure these memories when she’s a teenager and hates me.”

Ditzy growled playfully, pulling away a little and pouting up at him. “Grr! I will wub the cynicism out of you!”

Blueblood looked right at her, coy, but slightly-confused smile on his face. ’Love’ the cynicism out of me? That sounded like an invitation to sex. Was that an invitation to sex? Here? In front of the school? Maybe she wants to go home and-

The answer came abruptly as Ditzy grinned and began rubbing her hoof on his head. “Wub! Wub it all out!”

Blueblood tried to scowl, but he couldn’t help but grin at the random antics. “C’mon, let’s go home.”

She bobbed her head once and turned along with him. For Ditzy, there was no more racing off to work. No more hassles of being a postmare, with its 4am wakeup calls, overnight trips, and backbreaking loads. Instead, Ponyville’s new princess did more important things. She walked her daughter to school and picked her up when it ended. There was time for messy art projects and chaperoning field trips. Time to read together in bed until Dad reminded them that a growing filly needed nine hours of sleep each night.

They passed by a few other ponies about their morning business. Some exchanged brief greetings with the couple, but nopony really gave them a second glance. When Blueblood moved in, he was the talk of the town. When he married Ditzy, they both were. But after a few months, they were just a few odd ponies in a town already full of odd ponies. And that was just fine with everypony.

Ditzy’s hoofmaid met them at the door. As ever, Ditzy blushed and stammered as the formal servant fussed over her. Blueblood wasn’t the only pony still getting used to their new life.

With practiced ease, Blueblood shrugged out of his morning jacket and surrendered it to his butler. “What’s on for today, Butler Phil?”

The coal-black unicorn neatly began hanging the coat in the closet. “Your luncheon with the mayor is the closest event, Sir. Afterwards, you are committed to attending the falconry lesson with Rarity and her friend.”

“Which f-oh right, the one with the owl.”

Butler Phil continued in the same voice as ever. “Yes Sir, ‘the one with the owl.’ Who had saved Equestria on multiple occasions. You may have heard of her.”

Blueblood suppressed a chuckle – even if he was the butt of it, it was always a treat how butlers could deliver wit and sarcasm without the slightest hint of humor. Maybe one day Butler Phil would teach him his ways.

“On the subject,” the black stallion went on without missing a beat. “Miss Rarity stopped by to remind you of the event while you and the Lady were out. She asked that I deliver the following message: To please refrain from shouting ‘neeeeeerrrrd’ at Miss Sparkle in the future.”

“Who reads while going falconing, anyway?” Blueblood grunted, stepping upstairs. “You know, before I forget again, let me find those ugly cuff buttons. High time I returned them to her.”

“Miss Rarity may have intended those as a gift,” Butler Phil noted helpfully.

Blueblood snorted, his voice echoing from upstairs. “A gift? I wouldn’t give those things to Discord.”

He rummaged through his vanity, grumbling in annoyance. Where were those things, anyway? Those blocky, black things Rarity had put on his suit for that first, disastrous date. He kept telling himself he’d return them, time to finally make good on that.

A smile danced on his face as his search unearthed a few forgotten knick-knacks inhabiting the smaller drawers. Candles from the ‘welcome to Ponyville’ party Miss Pie threw for him. The ornamental monocle Fancy Pants gave him as a parting gift. That photo from Fancy’s wedding the groom made him swear not to show anypony. And…

Blueblood frowned a little as he pulled out a last object, his hunt for the buttons forgotten. A small, plain brown book. Every groove in its leather binding was caked with dust.

“The ol’ diary.” He flipped through a few pages, noting that only about half of them had been written in. So much had happened in the meantime, though! When did he put it away? Why did he stop writing?

He chuckled a little, glancing at the sparse bullet-points from his first trip to Ponyville. Lucky a find as it was…Blueblood didn’t really feel like reading through all his old writings. Nor did he particularly want to take up the hobby again.

But it felt too sad to just put it away again. His last entry was about a barroom brawl of all things, and the words stopped right there like a cliff. No resolution to the problems and worries he rambled about in the last few pages.

He wasn’t even sure he really wanted to add to it. But the dang thing would just keep him up all night thinking about it if he didn’t.

With a sigh, Blueblood settled himself down at his desk. He sat there a good fifteen minutes thinking about what to write. Then another fifteen minutes were wasted staring at his wedding picture, smiling faintly. A good day. A good night, too – Luna had a jealous fit that her sister presided over the ceremony. So she woke the whole town up that night, annulled their marriage, and demanded to wed them again. Nopony had the guts to tell her ‘no.’

Somehow, that wacky little turn of events just made him that much happier. Chuckling faintly to himself, Blueblood raised his pen and touched it to the worn pages one last time.

------

Dear Diary,

Long time, no write. And I don’t think I’ll be writing again.

A cynical pony might say that writing was a hobby of mine, one that I’ve lost interest in. I find myself at a different conclusion. In my hooves, the diary was a crutch for a very socially-challenged pony. I scribbled in it several times a day, cramming in thoughts and opinions that I would never share with another. I spoke to it like it was a pony, but all I was doing was talking to myself. There was no pony I allowed myself to truly confide in. Even with Celestia, whose rank once intimidated me despite our closeness.

I have none to blame but myself. I held ponies away, condescendingly standing on my pedestals of charity and cynicism. I thought I was alone, and the diary was the only thing I let myself be perfectly honest with.

Now I am graced with many, many friends. Some of them were friends since the day I met them, I simply lacked the wisdom to know it. There are many ponies I can speak to without reservation, sharing my hopes and worries without fear of being judged.

And so…I don’t really have much need for the diary, anymore.

So much has happened between the last entry and now, it’s foalish to even try to summarize it. Living in Ponyville, with my beautiful wife and pretty daughter, is all I could ever ask for. Every day is fresh and different, and I’m slowly getting used to the life of the rustic nobility. I’m chief of the Egalitarian Equestrian Ponyville branch – just like “Royal Advisor,” it’s a big title with little responsibility. But it DOES make the EE a ‘national’ organization, opening up a lot of government perks for us. I keep up with my friends in the city, but this place has well and truly become my home.

It’s not all good, all the time. But no matter how often I get dirty, or squabble with Rarity, or get cake thrown at me, it’s outweighed by the good. Presiding over holidays. The honest gratitude shown by the Apples when I got them that tax break. Hosting Dinky’s first sleepover (which was kind of fun in hindsight). Laughing with Rarity about the trouble Dinky and Sweetie Belle got into.

Summer evenings are spent on the porch swing, watching the sun go down with my hoof on Ditzy’s shoulder. And in the winter we bundle up together, usually with the little one between us.

Life is meant to be enjoyed. And I am enjoying myself.

So I’ll speak to you one last time, Diary. You’ve been my crutch, but I’ve learned to walk. I’m sorry I won’t be using the rest of your pages. You’re going back in the vanity, without any finale or ending.

But does every story really need to end? I don’t think so.

Yours,

~~Prince Blueblood~~