“Spike! I can’t believe you slept with not one, but two fillies! In a single night!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Why, what’s wrong with that?” Spike asked groggily as he sat up in the bed. Sweetie Belle leaned over and whispered something in his ear that got him blushing. “Oh! No, no, it wasn’t anything like that. They were just explaining the birds and the bees to me.”

“That’s precisely the problem!” Rarity shouted. “And don’t think you’re in any less trouble, young lady. When your parents hear about this…”

“He’s being literal,” Scootaloo said. “We were actually just explaining, because somepony never bothered to teach him about things, and he was confused when we overheard Rainbow Dash telling Fluttershy what she caught Rarity doing. And then we just kinda… fell asleep.”

“I didn’t know you had a coltfriend,” Twilight told Rarity. “You need to be more careful around the little ones, or, well this could happen.”

“And what exactly did happen? Looks like the children ran away to the library to read a book. I know we were all worried because we didn’t know where they were, but ultimately they were safe,” I said.

“And Rarity doesn’t have a coltfriend. Cloud does… or did,” Rainbow Dash explained.

Twilight looked confused at the explanation, not quite catching on until Spike pointed toward the book in question and cited a page number. That was enough for the unicorn to blush and nod in understanding. “Oh.”

“Twilight. I can see the topic is uncomfortable, but if you can’t have ‘the talk’ with Spike you need to figure out who you trust to do so. Especially if he’s still pursuing a relationship with Sweetie Belle,” I directed. At the mention, a little white hoof slipped into a little clawed hand, confirming that wasn’t ending anytime soon.

“Can you do it?” she asked.

“No. This is one thing I’m going to have to insist a pony handle,” I said. “I’m not sure I’m qualified to handle my own love-life, much less guide someone else through it. Speaking of which… Rarity, you’re joining me for lunch tomorrow. I’m not dealing with this in the middle of the night.”

“I’m surprised to see you up and about, despite your injuries, my dear,” Prince Blueblood said as I picked him up from his hotel.

“I’m sure it won’t be the only surprise in for you today,” I said as I led the way.

“That would be much more appealing in a different tone of voice,” the prince stated. “Is something the matter?”

“Nothing that can’t wait until lunch,” I assured. An uneasy silence descended over us as we made our way to the restaurant.

The white stallion managed to get even paler as we approached, Rarity waving us over eagerly from the booth she had secured for our party. “I can explain,” he began.

“Good. You’ll have a chance to do so,” I said. I took a seat on the side opposite Rarity, keeping toward the edge so that he was forced to sit beside the mare. I waited a moment for the waiter to do his duty and take his leave before beginning. “Rainbow Dash caught you in the act. Rarity admitted it. And the whole chain of events after that imperilled a number of children as well as several of us Element Bearers. But in the end, no one was hurt, and I’m not here to lay blame on you for that. What I am here to do is ask you why.”

“Well, you know, a stallion has certain needs… with your background, I thought you would understand more than anypony. And there’s certainly a long history of princes, as well as princesses, having their little… outside dalliances,” Blueblood began.

I waved dismissively. “That isn’t what I need to ask about. Why are you dating me in the first place?”

“Such lack of self confidence, really darling?” Rarity offered. “Look at you. You’re strong, brave, capable. A hero by all accounts.”

“The same could be said of you, but you’re also far more effeminate, a successful businessmare, and I think we have proof the prince personally finds you quite attractive. So again, why me?” I pressed.

Prince Blueblood sighed, waited for the waiter to refresh our drinks, before finally confessing. “Look, I didn’t want to admit this, of course. But auntie wanted me bound to you so I could keep an eye on you, maybe nudge you in the right direction if need be. Give you more reasons to be loyal to Equestria.”

“And you were willing to give your life to this? Even be wed in time to a non-pony if things went smoothly?” I questioned.

“What exactly do you think a prince does?” he asked. “I’ve known since I was a little colt that I would most likely be married off in some political gambit when I came of age. I was quite pleased as it was with the prospect of ending up with someone who would at least live in Equestria. I’ll have you know I’ve worked quite hard throughout my adolescence to cultivate a healthy level of xenophilia just for such an occasion.”

“I…” I froze a moment, processing that new information, before continuing. “Look. I think you two ought to just date one another and be done with it. Either way, I’m out. You were a perfect gentlecolt, at least in my presence, but… I’m not sure this was ever going to work in the first place. And if your Aunt Celestia asks… tell her I humbly request she keep her nose out of my love life, unless she wants to court me herself.”

“Ambitious,” Rarity applauded. “Though maybe that is aiming a bit too high. Have you considered courting Princess Luna instead?”

“Not what I meant, Generosity,” I said, not amused.

“I appreciate the honesty,” the prince said. “And I can certainly see the… advantages in what you suggest,” he added, opening eyeing the mare beside him and making her blush and titter. “But I do fear it would be quite impolitic. Auntie would turn a blind eye to our affair, I’m sure, but to openly court?”

“Do it anyways. If you love her, dare your Princess to come between you. I’ll have your back. If you don’t love her… well, you two can figure that out yourselves,” I offered. I left some bits on the table as I got up and left. They had a future to sort out for themselves, or abandon, whatever. I couldn’t bring myself to care. I was done dating ponies.

“So… how much trouble are y’all in,” Apple Bloom asked her friends.

“I’m not really sure, to be honest,” Spike said. “I think Twilight is trying to figure out who to get to talk to me about sex, but at this point I think I’ve got the gist of it anyways. And she hasn’t actually come down with any punishments… but that may just be a matter of time.”

“I’m pretty sure my sister is in more trouble than I am,” Sweetie Belle offered. “If we’d actually had sex, it might be different, but we all figured we’re too young for that.”

“And I’m pretty sure my parents don’t even know anything happened yet,” Scootaloo said.

“At least your parents haven’t disowned you,” Diamond Tiara said sadly.

“That’s more or less a technicality,” Scootaloo said.

“You know you’re welcome to stay at our house,” Silver Spoon offered.

“And somepony brought you this blanket,” Apple Bloom pointed out.

“That’s true… must have been Daddy,” Diamond conceded, giving the blanket a deep sniff. “I bet he’d take me back if it was just up to him.” The group gave her a firm hug, until she regained her composure. “So! Next order of business…”

“The school talent show,” Silver Spoon offered, revealing a poster which she promptly affixed to the clubhouse wall. “If we’re going to call ourselves the Elements of Greatness, we need to make a good showing for ourselves there. Leadership, what’s the plan?”

“Right, thanks for asking, Prosperity,” Diamond said, moving to the head of the clubhouse to address the others. Perseverance, I need you on set design and construction. After what you’ve done for this clubhouse since your sister hoofed it over to us, I know you can do it.”

“Aye, aye,” Apple Bloom said, saluting. “I’ll start drawing up the plans.”

“Awesomeness, I need you center stage, with some dancing and stunts. You’ll be the highlight of our group, while we’ll back you up with some choreographed moves. Think you can handle it?” Diamond continued.

“Can I?” Scootaloo asked rhetorically. “They’ll never know what hit ‘em!”

“Just don’t literally hit them. Gracefulness, you’re on music. The theme song you made for us is great, but we need to kick it up a notch for this,” Diamond said.

“I won’t let you down,” Sweetie Belle promised.

“Power, you’ll be actually playing the piano. Work with Gracefulness and get the notes down perfectly. Those hands of yours are great on the piano, and we need all five ponies for the formation prancing,” Diamond said.

Spike cracked his knuckles. “No problem.”

“And Prosperity and I will be supporting each of you as we go, lending a hoof where you need it,” Diamond concluded.

“And bringing pies,” Silver Spoon offered. The pies were easily the most popular prospect.

“So… does that mean we can get back together now?” Rainbow Dash asked before sipping a bit of tea from her cup.

“No. It means I’m done dating ponies. Certainly for the time being. Maybe forever,” I said, before doing the same.

“Ouch. I wasn’t that bad, was I? Anyways, I guess that means I came here for nothing,” Rainbow said.

“You came here for the tea, cookies, and conversation, I would hope,” I said. “Though I’m not sure if you were even invited. Thank you for the lovely spread, Fluttershy.”

“Oh, you’re quite welcome. And you know you are both welcome over anytime,” our host quietly replied. “I’m always happy to have another mare at my tea party.”

“Great!” Pinkie said, as she popped into a seat across from me. “Fill ‘er up!” She slid a tea cup over to Fluttershy, and was quickly rewarded with a steaming hot beverage. “You know, I’m going to have to do a lot of updating on my shipping chart now, but don’t worry, I’ve still got plenty of options on the board for you.”

“I said I’m not dating any more ponies,” I repeated.

“I know, that’s why it’s a lot of updates,” Pinkie said. “But I’ve still got others. Diamond Dust, Iron Will, Cranky, Tom, Red XIII. Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find your special some-not-pony.”

“Red XIII? That’s a weird name. What about this ‘Tom’?” I inquired.

“Oh? He’s rather close to my sister, Maud Pie. Maybe you two could get to know one another and she could introduce you?” Pinkie offered. “She’s away at school right now, studying geology, but I’ll make sure you meet next time she’s in town.”

“Sure, why not,” I said, before sipping some more tea. “Not promising to date anyone anytime soon, but it wouldn’t be bad to meet my friends’ families at least.”

“That’s the spirit. Here, have a cupcake!” Pinkie said, offering the aforementioned baked good before heading off as suddenly as she had arrived.

“Does anyone else think this cupcake is a trap?” I asked the pegasi after she left.

“Hard to say,” Rainbow conceded. “She does like pranks as much as me, but she also likes to bake. If you don’t want it…”

I offered it up to my ex-marefriend. “Enjoy. My turn to be the victim of the un-prank.”

“Unprank?” Fluttershy prompted.

“Like what Diamond Dust did to Rainbow Dash at Hearth’s Warming. Making the victim prank themselves with paranoia while not actually doing any pranks,” I explained.

“I knew she was up to something,” Rainbow Dash said, clopping the table with a hoof loudly and making Fluttershy wince. A few bits of baked good landed on the table from her mouth. “Sorry. Oh, and this is a great cupcake, you’re really missing out.”

“I kinda always thought of you as a pony, but apparently Pinkie doesn’t. When I told her I wasn’t dating any more ponies, you were first on her list of remaining candidates on her shipping grid,” I told Diamond Dust, sitting on the memory of the Nibelheim water tower.

“Well, she can cross me off. That ship has sailed,” Diamond Dust said. “Nothing against you, Master Strife, you just waited to long. I’m dating John de Lancie now.”

“Really? Good for you, I guess, but how would that even work?” I asked a bit incredulously.

“Let’s just say he can make some ~sweet vibrations~, unless you really want me to spell it out,” Diamond Dust explained.

“Okay, no, that’s plenty, thanks,” I said.

“Anyways, neither of us are looking to have foals, and there aren’t a whole lot of other options around here,” she pointed out. “And you’re not actually interested in me or you would have made a move, or at least responded to one of mine.”

“That’s true. I was just making conversation,” I admitted. “And I’m sure it won’t hurt for both of you to be in a better mood, in general. So, uh, good luck with that.”

“Thanks,” she said. “Speaking of which… we have a date over in your memory of Aeris’ church. So I’m going to go. Have a nice night.”

I waved her off and sighed, settling back to look at the memories of stars. The moon didn’t look quite how I remembered, or rather it matched more recent memories than it should. “Luna, if that’s you, you can come on down.”

The moon returned to how it looked on Gaia, and the darkly colored mare appeared at the base of the water tower. I hopped down to join her. “We heard that you have rebuffed our nephew’s advances.”

“Word travels fast,” I said. “He treated me well enough, but there was never much love nor lust in either direction, truth be told. He’s welcome to remain a friend if he cares to, especially if he remains in Ponyville.”

“That is… a rather mature ending,” she said. “And a rather bland description of it. I have heard…”

“He’s with somepony else,” I cut her off. “Somepony who appreciates him more than I ever could, and who meets his fancy more as well. Though it seems he has concerns your sister won’t approve, and will prevent it from going farther. Either way, it really isn’t my concern.”

We looked at each other for a bit. “‘Tia worries you’re dangerous.”

“I am, to my enemies. To those who would hurt my friends,” I said. “I don’t need a lover to have a reason to fight to protect the ponies around me. I cherish them enough as comrades, friends, and even neighbors.”

“You’ve changed. For the better it seems,” Luna said.

“Discord did something to me. In desperation. He tried to make me the opposite of myself, and it only… made me more like when I first arrived here. Like when I arrived in Midgar, for that matter. I wasn’t myself back then. I was trying to live out someone else’s dream,” I said.

“The man with the black hair?” she inquired.

I nodded. “Zach Fair. He was my friend when I was working for Shinra. He was a member of SOLDIER. I… I never made it in, despite my efforts. When he died, saving me… we had both been exposed to a lot of Mako, Jenova cells… experimented on. I got some of his memories, somehow. And his dreams. But… I think I’m back to myself now, or closer to it at least.

“When reversing our personalities only made us more vicious and efficient at attacking him, Discord tried restoring our personalities, and using the opening that left as a chance to hurt me. It finally cleared my head. And, well, I think you’ve seen the memories yourself. Impaling me on a sword never seems to work out that well for my enemies.”

Luna chuckled. “That’s true.”

“Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time,” John said.

“Discord! Show yourself!” Luna demanded.
“He can’t… that’s not Discord, just his voice. Somehow,” I said.

“Too true, sadly. What you hear is what you get,” John said. “Cloud rendered Discord speechless, and in so doing defeated me, his voice. And promptly made me into a summon. Now I’m not even a shadow of my former self, more an echo really.”

“Don’t you have a date?” I asked.

“I’m late!” he said.

“That’s… very strange,” Luna said. “But then, he, or rather Discord, is the avatar of chaos. Strange shouldn’t be too surprising.”

“It is annoying, though,” I said. “But at least he’s mostly harmless, occasionally slightly useful, and the rest of him is safely petrified on the moon, where he won’t find much chaos to empower his escape.”

“I feels strange for me to imprison somepony else on the moon,” Luna commented. “But you’re right, it is the safest place to store him. Though I fear he will break free in time, regardless, without the Tree of Harmony to maintain the power of the magic binding him.”

“Is there anyway to actually restore the Tree?” I asked.

“Not that I know of,” Luna said, sadly. “If anypony knew it would have been Starswirl the Bearded. Perhaps your librarian friend could research his writings, see if there are any helpful clues there?”

“It’s worth devoting at least some of her time toward,” I agreed. “I’ll suggest it to her tomorrow.”

“And I will mention it to Tia. His works are under lock and key, because they can be quite dangerous in the wrong hooves, but I am certain she will grant access to her favorite pupil. Destiny or no, I know my sister has great fondness for the mare,” Luna said.

The next evening, most of the town gathered at the theatre to see the local school children compete in a talent show. With a few of the Elements having sisters in the competition, our whole group were in attendance.

Rarity sat at one end of our group, with Prince Blueblood by her side. He seemed to be much more interested in his companion than the goings on on stage, which didn’t surprise me. Rainbow Dash was by my side, and I suspect was a little annoyed that I was more interested in the show than her. Twilight skipped the event entirely, already packing to leave for Canterlot and begin her new studies.

The Elements of Greatness were the final act for the evening, after we politely suffered through the amateurish efforts of various children, clapping for acts that would have gotten an adult booed off stage. The other foals had worked in teams of two or three. While this group was a full six, including Spike who never actually appeared on stage, we hadn’t expected anything nearly so elaborate.

The others had stepped out in front of the curtains to perform before the audience. But the Elements of Greatness raised the curtain to reveal a full set laid out. While it wasn’t professional grade, it was quality workmanship nonetheless. The five fillies before us were all dressed in their uniforms, spruced up with makeup and adorned with jewelry and other added markings.

“Weeeee-” they sang out. “Are the Elements of Greatness. And weeeee will do anything it takes, yeah~”

Applebloom soloed for a moment. “We will overcome any hast-le. Even when the Princess is in another cast-le.” Applebloom kicked down the Canterlot prop to reveal a prop of the ruins in Everfree, with Celestia and Luna painted into the window, well coreographed into their song and dance routine.

The sang out the chorus again as they rearranged themselves, somehow triggering a ramp to pop up from the front of the stage.

“We will overcome any doo-ooom!” Scootaloo declared, as she pulled out a scooter and started riding toward the audience. A circular rainbow lowered from the ceiling. She jumped over the audience, barely visible cables carrying her through the middle of the prop before bouncing her back out into the stage. “And even make a sonic rain-boom!”

They sang the chorus again as Diamond Tiara came to the fore. “I will lead my friends through any tri-al,” she sang as she slipped her namesake onto her head. “And stand together ‘gainst any deni-al.”

“And we are surely here to stay, and we will surely save the day, and then we’ll come around and play, enjoy the sunny day,~” Sweetie Belle sang, her own verse much more melodic and sweet then the edgy song the rest had been, a cardboard sun lowering to highlight her own verse before the song took on its former tone.

“For friends I’ll gladly bake a pie, but monsters get kicked in the eye,” Silver Spoon sang to a more staccato rhythm. “For with my friends I cannot fail, bad ponies simply go to jail. Cause we won’t let them ruin our day, in the end we’ll shout hurray!”

They wrapped up with a final rendition of the chorus, highlighted with fireworks and, shortly thereafter, a standing ovation. Spike finally joined them on stage to take a bow with them, and greet the audience.

“Did you see Scootaloo’s part? That. Was. Awesome!” Rainbow Dash gushed, as I smiled and nodded.

I had noticed even the Prince was paying rapt attention to the song, and Rarity was too engrossed herself to be bothered by the fact. I had to hand it to them, they had shown themselves quite capable at stagecraft, on top of their heroic contributions.