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Clueless at Canterlot Castle

by PonyThunder

Chapter 1: The Canterlot Banquet

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The Canterlot Banquet

As per usual, atmospheric music if you so desire. Each chapter will have different music chosen to best fit the theme (in theory). We'll see how well I can find songs...


Canterlot Castle loomed high above the surrounding landscape, casting its complex shadow over the valley far below. The air was cold and misty, with darkened clouds filling the space above the tallest towers. The full moon shone brightly amidst twilit skies, its rays of moonlight piercing through the clouds. It was the time of day that had a certain aura of mystery about it. The sun had begun to descend below the horizon, yet the full moon also cast its own light. It served as a reminder of the balance of power between the two alicorn sisters who controlled the sun and moon, Celestia and Luna. Legends had it that the two sisters were once at odds with each other, until one banished the other to the moon for their outburst and thirst for their turn in the limelight.

Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. Everypony knew their story, and everypony knew how it ended. Or more accurately, continued. The sisters were once again together, working in harmony and balance in a co-operative effort to govern the kingdom of Equestria fairly. But the two sisters did not always work well with one another. There were times where that disorder found its way out from behind a veil of secrecy. Such was the nature of having such powerfully opposite creatures living and reigning together. But, with great opposition came the opportunity to rule more effectively, and the two sisters lived happily as they served their kingdom.

Twilight and her friends walked towards the main entrance of Canterlot Castle, on their way to attend a banquet to commemorate the revival and destruction of Princess Luna and Nightmare Moon, respectively.

"Sheesh, has Canterlot Castle always looked this creepy?" said Spike.

Twilight glanced back at Spike, who was trailing the group of six ponies on their way into the castle. "It only looks creepy because it's nighttime."

"That's what they all say," Spike added with a dismissive claw in the air. "That is, until they're picked off one by one until finally, in their last dying moments, the killer is revea--"

Fluttershy was looking about nervously, shaking uncontrollably.

"Oh," said Spike as he put his claws back to his sides, "sorry Fluttershy."

"Look at what you're doing to Fluttershy, Spike," Twilight scolded him.

"Oh, th-that's okay, I'll be f-fine..." Fluttershy replied.

"Besides," Twilight continued, there's no reason to be worried about anything. This is Canterlot Castle. There are hundreds of guards all patrolling the castle grounds." She paused for a moment at the castle gate as two guards let them into the main foyer where Princess Luna and Celestia were greeting ponies as they entered. "Why are we even talking about this? We're going to a banquet for Celestia's sake!"

"Yes, Twilight?" Celestia replied from across the hall.

Twilight blushed. Most ponies tended to avoid invoking the name of their nation's leader in commonspeak because it tended to feel awkward when "her highness" herself was within hearing distance. Celestia seemed to enjoy it, as she had a warm smile on her face.

Twilight immediately trotted over to greet her properly, and the rest of everypony ensued behind her. Princess Luna and Celestia stood beneath two tall stained-glass windows depicting the sun and moon, respectively. Twilight admired the purposeful symbolism of having each princess stand beneath the other's stained-glass representation. It showed that the two sisters stood united, instead of against each other.

"I'm delighted to see everypony could make it to the banquet tonight," Celestia said warmly. "I'm positive you'll enjoy the night's festivities."

"I was hoping to have some time to talk," said Twilight.

"Of course, Twilight," Celestia smiled, "when the guests stop arriving and there's been some time for things to quiet down, you can be sure we'll have some time to partake in our usual chit-chat." She smiled and winked at Twilight.

Twilight opened her mouth to talk more, but Celestia politely coughed into her hoof and gestured to the line of ponies behind Twilight and her friends.

Twilight immediately understood and blushed as they headed further up the stairs to the main hall.

"Of course, you can always feel free to talk with me," said Luna during their departure, "if you'd like."

Twilight paused for a few moments. "Yeah, sure thing!" she replied half-enthusiastically, and continued up the steps.

Celestia turned to her sister. "I'm sure they'll warm up to you as time goes on," she consoled warmly.


Twilight and company trotted through the main hall and into the ballroom, which was already quite packed with guests. At the far corner was a long table decorated with a wide assortment of cakes and pastries, at which Pinkie Pie had already been standing next to despite seemingly being at their side only moments prior. Some fancy, important-looking ponies were admiring a statuette of an alicorn by the main window overlooking the landscape several hundred feet below. At the other end of the room near a raised platform around which several Wonderbolts were conversing and seemed to be in raucous laughter over something that was entertaining. In a quiet, cozy corner with a few chairs and tables were several mares and stallions enjoying the food and tea, one of which was Treehugger.

"Alright, everypony," said Twilight, "shall we--"

"Um, Twilight," said Applejack, abruptly interrupting her sentence, "it's only you an' me. Everpony's already skedaddled."

Twilight looked back, sighed and rolled her eyes. "I guess so," she replied. "I guess it's just you and..."

Twilight's mouth hung open slightly as she watched Applejack make her way over to what she could only assume was either a problem that needed fixing, or some kind of amazing apple-related item. Probably the former, Twilight reckoned.

"I'm still here," said Spike. Twilight had almost forgotten he was even there. In the crowd of ponies, Spike's lack of height wasn't doing any favors for his noticeability. More than usual, at least. "That is, until the murderous perpetrator comes and get's me," he added with a mockingly scary tone of voice.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Come on, now," she dismissed playfully, "nothing creepy is going to happen. I still don't even understand why this came about. We've been to plenty of late-night parties just like this one before, you know."

Spike simply shrugged his shoulders, dismissing it on the grounds that what's fun is fun, and not everything needs a reason. "Well, I'm going to hit the buffet. Pinkie Pie seems to know the real way to enjoy these kinds of parties."

Spike meandered his way through the crowded ballroom floor, even sliding beneath a few ponies on his trek to the far side of the room. Twilight sighed once more and began socializing with the ponies around her, but most of the conversations tended to drift into statements like, "Oh wow! The Princess of Friendship? It's an honor to meet you!" and "Did you really have a magical laser battle with Tirek?" or "Is it true that you have an unhealthy fear of quesadillas?"

Yes. Yes, I did. Mhmm, yup. Yes, that is true. Yes--WHY DOES EVERYPONY KNOW THAT

Twilight could only imagine what Celestia had to go through, greeting literally everypony that was attending the banquet. It must have been exhausting, having to constantly keep up appearances to everypony she ever met. Except her, of course. And Luna. And probably some other ponies as well. She dismissed the train of thought and decided to trot towards the punch bowl.


"I do say, that just may be the most intriguing story I have ever heard," said an upscale pony wearing a hat nearly the size of her body. Rarity had just walked up to a group of ponies exchanging conversation in front of an exquisite statue of an alicorn placed in front of a rather large window overlooking the valley far below the castle. The view below was daunting.

"Oh, if it isn't Rarity," said Fancy Pants, adjusting his monocle at the same time. "It's a pleasure to see you again."

"The feeling is mutual," Rarity replied, casually smiling and acknowledging both Fancy Pants and the other mare with him. She didn't recognize her. She was a deep pink color, almost red, and with a yellow mane.

Thankfully, he quickly took notice and introduced them to each other. "Rarity, this is Incongruous Aberration."

"Um, nice to meet you," said Rarity. "That is a...beautiful name."

The mare glanced towards the vicinity of Rarity but did not meet her gaze, her nose tilted slightly upwards. "Yes, it is."

An awkward silence ensued, which Rarity thoughtfully broke through with an observation of the statue standing next to them. "This is quite the exquisite statue, don't you think? I especially adore the attention to detail on the mane. It must be so painstakingly difficult to chisel away at stone for such a long time."

"Perhaps," said the snooty mare, "if you are inexperienced in the art."

"I...suppose that is true..." replied Rarity, trying her hardest to ignore how rude this pony was being.

"Well," said Fancy Pants, "I think it's beautiful either way."

"Absolutely," replied the snooty mare with so much emphasis that Rarity was sure she would need to take a breath half way through her response.

"So," said Rarity, "do you know who made this sculpture? I haven't seen it before in my previous visits to the castle."

"Of course I do," she replied. "I'm the pony who financed the artist to build it."

Of course you were, thought Rarity.

The snooty mare continued. "I'm merely renting it out. It'll be moved out of here tomorrow morning when the banquet has long been past."


Rainbow Dash was in conversation with Spitfire and Soarin, who were talking at the opposite end of the room next to a slightly elevated platform.

"So anyways," continued Rainbow Dash, "that prank was one of my best yet."

"I can't believe you actually tricked that little dragon dude in sending hundreds of scrolls to the princess," said Soarin. "What did they say, anyways?"

Dash laughed, a little bit nervously. "Uh...that's probably not the best thing to repeat out loud..."

"Just spill it, newbie," said Spitfire.

Dash looked around behind her head, on the off chance that Celestia was near them, and then whispered into their ears what was written on the hundreds of scrolls she had pranked Spike into sending to Celestia.

Soarin raised his voice in shock, only to have his face muzzled by Dash's hoof. "Holy Celesti--"

"Not the best thing to repeat out loud," she reiterated.

Suddenly, an ear-piercing scream echoed over the dull roar throughout the room. For some reason, an earth pony was perched high atop the rafters near the ceiling between Rainbow Dash and the far end of the room where the statue in front of the large window was located.

They were tied to the rafter itself, but the rope was coming loose until suddenly, it broke free and the pony began to plummet towards the floor. Like a bolt of lightning, Rainbow Dash leapt from the floor and shot through the air towards the falling pony, catching them in mid-flight and continuing to soar through the air, right towards the fancy statue.

This is going to hurt, Rainbow thought to herself before she slammed into the stone statue, causing it to sway towards the open window as she tumbled to the ground beneath it holding the pony who had been tied up. Everypony in the room gasped as Dash looked up at the statue as it precariously tilted towards the glass window overlooking the valley below. But before she could think to do anything to stop it, the statue continued in its path and smashed through the glass, tumbling out of the window and falling down several hundred feet until crumbling into dust at the end of its fall.

Several seconds of sustained silence permeated throughout the entire room as everypony had their gazes fixed on the broken window, as well as the pony that Dash had rescued.

Dash looked back where she had placed the falling pony. "What were you doing way up...there..."

The pony wasn't even a pony at all. It was an elaborately dressed mannequin with rope tied around it. Dash looked at Rarity with a mixture of shock and confusion, to which Rarity could only reply, "What in Equestria is going on?"

The lights went out, and a chorus of yells and screams immediately followed.

 

Next Chapter: And Then There Were Five Estimated time remaining: 9 Minutes

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