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Group Precipitation

by FanOfMostEverything

Chapter 384: Cardiopulmonary a Dull Moment, by Speckle

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Author's Notes:

Content Warning: Homestuck.

“Breath is all about freedom, direction, and the motivation to achieve both at your own pace. And your goals, of course! Breath, for all its detachment, is really big on goals.”

“Mmm-hmm.”

Having remembered her notebook this time, Twilight Sparkle barely looked up as she jotted down everything that came out of Abstract Cognition's mouth, even as it moved a mile a minute.

“And, from the outside, it looks a lot like Rainbow Dash is bread and butter Breath! BUT! She's always there for her friends, stands by them and the school as a whole, she's inspiring and almost leader-like whenever she takes up the torch of heroism—”

The pen stopped mid-scribble, “Torch of what-now?”

“—and all of that ties into things like Loyalty, responsibility, and taking the community at large into account. And that's Blood! I mean, sure, she's got an ego and is super obsessed with being cool despite everything, which is why I slotted her into the Knight Class AND the Page Class.”

Abstract Cognition was once again airborne, her lunch balanced on her stomach as she laid back in midair, as though resting within a hammock. Her juice forgotten in one hand, the orange glow around her grew brighter with every bit of exposition she spoke, warring with her lightbow in terms of brilliance.

“Pages start out slow in their Aspect despite producing it in crazy amounts without realizing, and Knights are all about masking their true personality with one that they believe society will accept.” Abstract wasn't really looking at Twilight anymore, instead focusing on the sole cloud in the sky as she gestured with her free hand. “But, more importantly, Knights utilize and apply their Aspect to just about everything they need to get through life. That's where the Knight of Breath/Page of Blood dichotomy comes in!”

Her own lunch forgotten beside her on the bench, Twilight chewed on her lower lip as she rechecked her notes for the ninth time before looking back up at Abstract. “But Rainbow's loyalty is obvious,” Twilight felt the need to defend her friend, glancing over at the open field before them and the soccer game taking place upon it.

It was easy to spot the rainbow-headed girl zigging and zagging with impressive speed between players without spreading her lightbow. Rainbow herself had set up the rules of this game and, because of the various aspects at play, decided on a "normal, old-school version of soccer." “She never would have been chosen if she hadn't been worthy of—”

“GANG WAY!”

Reacting with the speed and grace of someone used to hitting the deck whenever the PE teacher decided on volleyball for the sport of the day, Abstract somersaulted out of the air, bellyflopping onto the remnants of her mother's tuna salad while Twilight let out a loud, unladylike squawk as the forgotten juice nearly stained her notes. Meanwhile, a soccer ball sailed with incredible speed into the makeshift goal across from Rainbow Dash, the goalie very nearly losing his head as he dove for cover with a wail nearly identical to an infamous cinematic sound effect.

One very loud whoop and a resounding group cheer later, Abstract remembered where she was and, with bright red staining her rosy cheeks, she slowly got to her feet, looking down at the mess on her shirt. Twilight, meanwhile, had determined that nothing of vital importance—i.e. all four of her notebooks—had been lost, and so collected herself as much as she could before sitting back down and leveling a glare in the pegasus aspects' collective direction.

“... She also has an ego, as I mentioned before, and it's kinda huge.” Abstract's voice fell a bit flat as she tried to clean off the mashed fish and mayo with a napkin. “It's shrinking, sure, but it's still there. The biggest issue that a Page has, besides procrastination, is getting over their self-centeredness. Horuss only got over the first hurdle and Tavros never had the latter. Jake English, hoo boy, full package. Total train-wreck in terms of relationship management. Thankfully, Rainbow isn't Jake, but she's not exactly Tavros either.”

"... Rainbow Dash isn't obsessed with horses to a sexual degree," Twilight finally got out, deciding that, with her notes safe, there was no reason to remain angry. Vaguely bemused by the source material, but not angry.

"No, she just likes to win and look cool while doing it."

"That's fair."

Realizing that her shirt was a lost cause, Abstract's face scrunched, but the orange glow remained as she dutifully continued her analysis, collecting her salad bowl and spork as she did. “She performs heroic services for others for their sake, but also to satiate her own ego. Granted it's nowhere near as bad as last year. Breath and Blood already have an intricate duality, but Rainbow Dash is her own personal paradox, it's no surprise I noticed her first when I started the project.” A pause. “Well, okay, Sunset was hard to ignore even before the whole Saturation thingy, but she was harder to figure out Classpect-wise."

"That's understandable." Twilight offered Abstract the remains of the juice, which she took with an apologetic smile. "The whole thing was a bit... much for her, at least at first."

"I'll bet." Abstract grinned. "Dash, however, was actually pretty easy. Granted, her Master Title took some work, what with the two-syllable system and all, but I finally decided that Squire of Spirit is the perfect fit, since a squire is, historically, the medieval rank between knight and page."

Twilight glanced at the field again. With the game over, Rainbow Dash was performing a midair victory dance over the heads of the opposing team while her own laughed and cheered. Twilight's face twisted into a concerned look as she turned to Abstract.

"Who is she in service to?"

"Sunset, of course!"

The concern morphed into full-blown worry.

Next Chapter: On Binary Star Formation, by FoME Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 7 Minutes
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