Flash Sentry didn't like to think of himself as vain, but he could admit to himself that keeping his car polished to a spotless shine wasn't exactly practical when he could fly almost anywhere in Canterlot in about the time it'd take to drive there. Still, he happily spent Sunday afternoons caring for his ride in his driveway whenever possible.

"Flash?" Of course, that made it all the easier for childhood friends to find him.

He looked up from the hood of his car. "What's uhhh..." Flash looked at the Carousel Boutique bag. Then at Ditzy. Then back to the bag. Then back to Ditzy.

She gave him a nervous grin and thrust the bag towards him. "Happy birthday?"

"Thanks?" he said with just as much uncertainty, then took the bag with perhaps even more. "That's not until Wednesday, but..." He trailed off as he moved aside the tissue paper and got a good look at the bag's contents.

There was lace. There were frills. There was crinoline. Flash wasn't sure what crinoline was, but he was certain it was present in the dress barely contained by that diamond-marked paper sack.

He was also certain that his icon was embroidered just under the bodice.

"I, uh..." After a moment, Flash's brain rebooted enough for him to tear his eyes away from the dress and say, "I feel like there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. Please tell me there is."

"W-well..." Seeing that Ditzy was just as embarrassed as he felt was strangely reassuring. "See, lately I've been noticing some, uh, trends."

Flash felt he should contribute something at that point. "Trends." He kicked himself mentally.

"Yeah. Among, uh, other yous." Ditzy looked down at her twiddling thumbs. "You know, in nearby universes."

"Other mes." The kicking got harder.

"Metal Cog."

"Metal Cog?" Flash blinked. Ditzy smirked. Both laughed. He put down the bag and said, "So, uh, these other Flashes are, um, cross-dressing?"

"Among other things," Ditzy said with a blush. "It, uh... Well, some of them looked so miserable before they started, well..."

"Flouncing?"

"Flouncing's a good word for it. But yeah, when they did, they seemed so happy. Some were beating themselves up over being happy, but still." Ditzy gave a crooked grin. "I just wanted you to know that I'm there for you, no matter what you're... you know, into."

"Well, uh..." Flash cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. He unconsciously smoothed the feathers back down and said, "I appreciate the thought. Really. But..."

"You're not..." Ditzy bit her lip. "Confused?"

"Oh, I'm definitely confused right now. Just not the way you mean."

"Oh. Got it." Ditzy looked down. "Sorry."

"I really do appreciate what you were trying to do." Flash gave his usual winning grin as he offered her the bag. "Why don't you exchange this, get something for yourself?"

After a few moments of eying the bag, Ditzy accepted it. "Well... I did keep the receipt. You know, just in case."

Flash nodded, his smile widening. "There you go."

Ditzy returned the nod and spread her wingbow. "Bye, Flash," she said as she ascended.

Flash started to wave, but paused when a thought crossed his mind. "Hey, uh, before you go..."

"Yeah?"

"Why were you checking out all those other mes anyway?"

Ditzy just stared at him for a few moments, mouth agape and cheeks aflame. Then she collapsed in on herself, dropping the Boutique bag in the process.

Naturally, the dress spilled out.

Naturally, Flash's mother pulled up the driveway that very moment.

She looked at the dress, paying particular attention to under the bodice, then looked back at Flash. She gave an attempt at a smile and said, "Dear, just know that I support you no matter what your lifestyle."

Flash buried his face in his palms and groaned.

Author's Notes:

A loving tribute to the ongoing Skirtsian Renaissance.