"What is life? Is it nothing more than the endless search for a cutie mark? And what is a cutie mark but a constant reminder that we're all only one bugbear attack away from oblivion? And what of the poor gator, flank forever blank, destined to an existential swim down the river of life to an unknowable destiny?"

I honestly didn't know, and sitting there, watching as half of Ponyville soared through the air with panicked looks on their faces while the other half of the town stood and watched with their mouths hanging open, wasn't helping.

So, in order to give myself some motivation to solve the enormous puzzle that was life, I decided to go downstairs to Sugarcube Corner and get some food, and maybe ask a cupcake or two if they have any ideas. Even though I don't even speak cupcake, (that's more Pinkie Pie's thing), It's worth a try.

Anything's better than asking a pony. After watching half the ponies I've ever met in my entire life sail across the town waving their hooves frantically like they were going to die and nearly killing a dozen helpless birds and a helicopter turtle in the process, my faith in the equine race has been destroyed.

Of course, no hysterical ponies, Pelicans, or helicopter turtles were actually killed during that little, episode. The drama queens. Wait. Did I just say Pelicans? Have I ever even seen a Pelican?