Celestia was lying on her beach chair, sipping a cool, red, fruity cocktail. She really loved the beach; the smell and sound of the sea, the warm sand...
She closed her eyes and enjoyed her sun shining on her face.
Until, all of a sudden, this warm feeling was gone. She opened her eyes again, curious what might have caused this shadow.

"Hello, sister," Luna grinned.

"Oh, Luna," Celestia sighed,
"you do know I am not very fond of you entering my dreams, especially if I have such a nice one. What do you want?"

"Well, I just wanted to tell you that this 'Nightmare Moon and Antonius are here to destroy us'-rumor was not spread by Blueblood."

Celestia sat up:

"How do you know?"

"Antonius and I asked him."

Uh-oh.

"Luna, what have you two done?"

"Relax, sister, I just entered his dream and tagged Tony along. We politely asked him if he really has stopped badmouthing Tony, and he swore he had. And you know what? I actually believe him. Guess this rumor has developed a life of its own."

"That's hardly good news," Celestia sighed,
"but at the moment, we can't do anything about it. Was that all you wanted to tell me? That could have waited until tomorrow."

Luna smiled.

"Perhaps, dear sister, but I also wanted to invite you."

"Invite?"

"Yes, I suggested fighting some fierce creature to Tony. That way, he can blow off steam without accidentally endangering anypony. He accepted. Now, I want to invite you to join us."

Celestia made a face.

"So, you want me to leave my delightful beach dream to watch Antonius slaughter some dream construct? It will be dream constructs, not real dreaming creatures, right?"

"Of course, sister! What do you think I am? I will simulate their behavior, and Tony will fight them."

"Why do you want me to watch?"

"Come on, this will be interesting! And - between the two of us - you really could need a little fighting experience. Watching Tony would certainly be beneficial."

Celestia sighed again.

"Okay, Luna. Let's go. Just save this dream for me."

"As you wish, sister", Luna grinned and lit her horn.

The next moment, they were standing in a large, grassy clearing. Antonius was already waiting for them in full armor, helmet on his head.

"Greetings," he said,
"I suppose that means we can start."

"Indeed," Luna told him and lit her horn.

A chimera appeared a few meters away.

"And another legendary creature," Antonius commented and drew his sword.

Ugh, this would get messy. Unless...

"Antonius," Celestia said,
"do you think you could defeat this chimera without using your weapons?"

Antonius looked at her, then back at the creature.

"Probably," he stated.

"Then, I dare you to try it. Fight the chimera unarmed!"

Antonius took another look at her and said:

"I accept your challenge."

He put his sword away and assumed a defensive stance.
Celestia was contend. With this challenge, she had really managed to trick him into not using his weapons. She was sure that meant that the messiness and violence would be kept within reasonable limits.

"Ready?" Luna asked,
"then let the fight begin!"

Celestia and Luna took a few steps back to watch the scene from a safe distance while the chimera came to life.

"Ah, a guest," the tiger head said.

"It talks. I'm not too surprised," Antonius noticed flatly.

"I wanted to create the appropriate atmosphere," Luna told him.

"That's good," the goat head bleated, ignoring Antonius and Luna,
"we haven't eaten in days."

"Yeah," the snake head confirmed,
"we are very hungry."

"In a second, your hunger will be the least of your problems," Antonius stated coldly.

Hmm... at least he played along.

"On three, sisters," the tiger head growled.

"OnetwothreeMOVEIT!" Antonius barked.

The chimera attacked, its heads roaring, bleating and hissing. It jumped at Antonius, but he quickly took a step to the side and evaded the creature. As it passed him, however, he grabbed its snake part and stopped it in the middle of its jump, leading to a rather ungraceful landing.
Now Antonius stepped on the chimera's back, where the snake part was attached, and...
Yikes!
... ripped the snake part out of the creature's body, creating a fountain of blood!

So much for keeping the messiness and violence within reasonable limits. Celestia was totally aghast.

"Wait a second!" Luna shouted.

Antonius turned to her, the chimera under his boot, the severed snake part still in his grasp.

"Is something wrong?" he asked almost innocently.

"Well, to be honest, I did not expect this. I have to admit that I have no idea how a chimera would behave in such a situation."

"I guess it would be in serious pain and mad as hell."

"Umm... yes... probably."

"Then, just maximize the creature's aggressiveness. That should do."

He turned to the severed snake head:

"Don't you think?"

He moved his hand a little, so that it looked like the head was nodding.

"Antonius! That is disgusting! And macabre!" Celestia shouted.

"Hey, it's just a dream. A simulation. I just wanted to lighten up the mood," Antonius told them.

"It would probably be better if you did not use severed body parts in that process," Luna said.

"Okay," Antonius answered curtly and threw the snake part away.

Now, the chimera started moving again and almost made Antonius loose his balance when it jumped up. It quickly turned around and attacked him, trying to bite his head off with its tiger-head.
Antonius managed to prevent it from doing that by grabbing the head with both of his hands. He could not take care of the chimera's claws, however. They scratched across his pauldronds and arms as the creature tried to rip him apart. Furthermore, the goat head tried to bite him.
It really looked as if he was in serious danger now - for about a second.

He kept his grasp on the tiger head and elbowed the goat head. This shook the chimera enough so that he could adjust his grasp: his left hand held the creature's upper jaw, his right hand the lower jaw. Now, he ripped the tiger's lower jaw out, spilling more blood in the process.

She really should have allowed him to use his sword, Celestia thought. Couldn't have been any messier.

Now that his right hand was free, Antonius punched the chimera in the chest with enough force to lift it into the air. He used this gained space to shift his body and get the goat head into a chokehold. A jolt, and a loud crack told Celestia that he had just snapped the goat's neck.

The fight was over.

Antonius obviously thought otherwise. He threw the chimera onto the ground and his armored boot came down on what was left of the tiger head, crushing it with a sick crunch.

Now it was really over. Finally.

"That was an outstanding performance!" Luna cheered.

What? Celestia was sick and her little sister was downright enthusiastic?

"Thank you," Antonius said,
"I have to commend you, too. This fight felt absolutely real, from the creature's strength to the effects of the wounds. We really have to do another session sometime soon."

"With pleasure!"

Great. Luna and Antonius had found a hobby.

Well, at least it would enable him to 'blow off steam'. Celestia, for her part, was happy that it was over. And she knew she wouldn't eat anything red for breakfast. Or anything crunchy. Or mushy.

"Please get me back into my beach dream now, Luna," she asked.

"At once, sister!" Luna answered and lit her horn.

The next moment, Celestia was back in her beach chair, her cocktail next to her. Her blood-red cocktail.

"Damnit," she mumbled.

"Do you think I succeeded in creating the right atmosphere?" Luna asked.

"Definitely. Why do you ask?" Antonius replied.

"Well, you seemed to be a bit annoyed by the chimera's talking. You interrupted it and urged it to attack immediately."

"That was actually part of my strategy. Talking seemed to be a part of the creature's routine, so I disrupted its routine to rattle it."

"Oh, so you really were content with the fight?"

"Of course, just like I said. Were you content with the fight, too?"

"You know, if I am completely honest, I have to tell you that the way you defeated the chimera had been a bit messy," Luna told Antonius.

"What did you expect? I couldn't talk it to death, and without weapons, the possibilities were somewhat limited," Antonius answered.

"Maybe, but ripping it apart bit by bit was a tad... nauseating. First the snake head, then the tiger's lower jaw..."

"Hey, it wanted to bite me."

"True, but please don't do something like that to a pony, okay?"

"Don't worry," Antonius smiled,
"I know something better to do with a pony's jaw."

"And that is?" Luna asked, half curiously, half worriedly.

At that, Antonius started stroking her under the chin.

"Funny. Really funny," she deadpanned.

The next morning, Luna and Antonius waved goodbye as Stormy left for school.

"Without us escorting her," Antonius mumbled.

"Don't worry," Luna smiled,
"she is, in fact, old enough and knows the way by now. And as you have seen yesterday, nopony will dare to bully her."

"Right."

"What are you going to do today?"

"I think I'll revise my first draft of the history of mankind, unless something else happens and pulls me away from that."

"What do you think could happen?"

Suddenly, Antonius' vox beeped.

"Right on cue," he said and turned to the vox.

"Applejack's frequency," he added.

"Hello? Antonius?" a voice came out of the device.

Not Applejack, but Rarity.

"Yes, it's me. How can I help you?" Antonius answered.

"I just wanted to tell you that your clothes are ready. You can come by any time and pick them up."

"Good, thank you. I'll come as soon as I can. Antonius, out."

"Out? Oh, I see. Rarity, out! ... now, what do I have to... ah!"

The transmission was cut.

"Well, I guess I know what I really will do today. I'll head for the chariots. Bye, Luna. Until sunset, respectively moonrise."

"Bye, Tony."

Antonius left and Luna got on her way to Celestia.

"Good morrow, dear sister," Luna smiled,
"how was the rest of your night's sleep?"

"I slept well, Luna, thank you. Despite the carnage."

"Yeah, his fighting style is really unique. Since he is our ally, this actually benefits us."

"Maybe. I just hope that he never shows such aggression towards a pony."

"Don't worry, sister," Luna grinned,
"the worst thing he'll do is some stroking under the chin."

"Huh? How do you know?"

"Umm... first-hoof experience?"

Celestia stared at her sister:

"Luna! We are NOT pets! Bring this fact home to him."

"Oh, he already knows that. It's just a little friendly teasing."

"Hmm. I certainly hope so," Celestia said thoughtfully, then she started smiling:
"Just tell me if he should try to put you on a leash."

"Nah, I really don't think he's into that sort of stuff... could be worth a try, though."

"Luna!" Celestia cringed.

"Haha! You should have seen your face! But seriously, everything is fine. You know he is basically a friendly creature."

"As long as he doesn't rip apart his enemies..."

"That is exactly the point, sister. His ENEMIES. And only them. As he said, he is a warrior."

"Right, but seeing the way he fights, his almost creepy prowess, I have one question: What kind of war needs such warriors?"

"The war against Chaos. You have not been in Hope. I was. I can tell you, he needs - and we need - every bit of his skills."

Celestia nodded and said:

"Indeed... but wait a second... weren't the Space Marines created primarily to reunite mankind and fight the aliens that oppressed it? That means that those aliens were - or are still - as dangerous as Chaos! Not a nice perspective.
It is also possible, of course, that their emperor already had the fight against Chaos in mind... impossible to say.
Be that as it may, one thing is clear: Antonius really is critically important to us. Well, luckily, we don't have to be overcautious and watch his every step. He has shown that he can take care of himself. I don't think there is anything in Equestria that can easily endanger him."

"Come on, Applejack," Rainbow Dash complained,
"you have spent some time with him. Can't you help me?"

"No, Rainbow," Applejack answered,
"I won't help you to prank Antonius. Seriously, what has gotten into you?"

"I hate losing," Rainbow pouted,
"and he defeated all of us with ease. I just want to come back at him, show him that we are tough!"

"All right," Applejack deadpanned,
"so we have a very important alien super warrior and you can only think about annoying him. Great, really."

"I'm sure he will appreciate a good prank."

"I wouldn't bet on it."

"Okay, fine. Don't help me. I'll think of something myself, but I must hurry. I saw him go into Rarity's boutique. I must come up with a good prank before he leaves again!"

Rainbow turned around and darted into the sky.

Applejack sighed and wanted to get back to her work, but she hesitated. Should she better warn Antonius that Rainbow wanted to prank him? It wouldn't be very nice towards her friend, but it would certainly be better than an angry Antonius. She sighed again and set out for Ponyville.

Antonius knocked and entered the boutique.

"Rarity?" he asked into the empty room.

No answer.

"Rarity? Are you in here somewhere?" he asked a bit louder.

Still no answer.

Antonius used his auspex to scan the area around him: One pony life-sign ahead of him behind a door. But why did this pony not answer?
He went to the relevant door, knocked and got a scream as an answer. Deeming this as prove enough of an emergency, he charged through the door - just to find Rarity in front of a large mirror... wearing socks?

She screamed again. Antonius quickly looked around the room, but could not see any hostile creatures.

"Rarity? Are you all right? Why are you screaming?" he asked.

"How could I not scream? You charged into my room!" she answered indignantly.

"I charged because you screamed."

"Well, I screamed because you startled me!"

"By knocking at your door? How could that startle you? I also called your name when I entered your boutique. Twice!"

Her indignation made way for some embarrassment, including a little blush.

"Oh? Really? Sorry, I was 'in the zone'."

"'Zone'? What 'zone'?"

"Well, it's sort of a creative thing..."

"Ah. Intriguing. Has this something to do with you adapting the concept of socks for ponykind?"

Rarity looked down her legs at the white and blue socks and her blush deepened.

"Umm...actually, yes."

She shifted from one hoof to another, then she said:

"Antonius, I must ask you a question, especially since socks are from your culture."

"Go ahead."

Rarity turned a little, so that her side was visible.

"Do they look somewhat... indecent to you?"

Well, that was a question Antonius definitely had not expected.

"Huh?"

"I mean, they are great casual wear, very comfortable. But I also noticed that they slightly accentuate a pony's flank, so do you think a pony looks indecent wearing them?"

Antonius caught himself actually taking a look at Rarity's flank. He quickly turned his eyes back to her face and tried to come up with some sort of answer.

"Well, this question is a little strange, especially if you take into consideration that ponies usually don't wear clothes at all. Still, I don't think there's anything indecent about ponies wearing socks."

"Perfect!" beamed Rarity,
"now please wait a second, I'll quickly take them off and then we can have a look at your clothes. They are ready behind the curtain where you took the measurements. Please try them on, so that I can see if they fit."

Antonius went ahead and vanished behind said curtain to take a look at the clothes:
Just as the pajamas, they followed the Ultramarine color pattern. They were heavier though, more resilient, and instead of replacing the skulls with smilies, Rarity had omitted them completely. Really more fitting for something you wanted to wear in public.
He donned the clothes and stepped through the curtain into the room. Rarity was waiting for him.

"And?" she asked eagerly,
"do you like them?"

"Yes, they are fine," Antonius nodded,
"really, excellent work. Fitting, colors, everything is immaculate. Thank you."

"Oh, you're welcome! I have to admit, thinking in those different shapes was a bit of a challenge, but I'm happy that you..."

At that moment, Rainbow Dash burst into the boutique.

"Hello, Antonius!" she blurted,
"I hope you have a little bit of time to spare. I have something very important to show you!"

"Should I pick my armor and weapons?" Antonius asked.

"Nah, not necessary. Just come, quick!"

Antonius turned to Rarity:

"Okay, I'll leave my equipment here. Please don't touch it, you might hurt yourself."

"No problem," Rarity assured him.

"Come on, Antonius!" Rainbow urged.

Antonius followed Rainbow Dash out of the boutique.

As Applejack entered Rarity's boutique, she could only see the back half of her friend, the rest was hidden behind a big curtain.

"Hello, Rarity," she greeted.

Rarity took a leap backward and shouted:

"I haven't done anything! Especially not taken a look at Antonius' armor!"

Applejack smiled.

"I'm not here to monitor you," she assured her,
"but now that you've mentioned Antonius, where is he? I've got to warn him of a prank Rainbow wants to play on him."

Rarity stared at her.

"Oh dear," she said.

"Where is this 'something' you want to show me?" Antonius asked.

"A little into the forest. Just follow me!" Rainbow answered.

They had just passed the border of the Everfree. Had Rainbow told him that they were going into the forest, he would have taken his chainsword with him. Well, it was too late for that now, and if she said he did not need his weapons, she was probably right.
A bit suspicious was her eagerness - and this quite snickering now and then. His transhuman awareness suggested that this could be some sort of trap, but why should the Element of Loyalty lead him into a trap? They were allies, after all.

"Here it is!" Rainbow exclaimed and hovered in the air, close to some treetops.

"What is where?" Antonius asked.

"Just a few steps more, then you will see it!"

Okay, this whole situation downright screamed 'TRAP!', but that did not make any sense. As alert as possible, Antonius slowly advanced, constantly scanning his surroundings. No sign of a threat. He stepped into a patch of blue flowers. Still no sign of a threat.

"Seriously, Rainbow, what did you want to..."

Suddenly, Antonius recognized that something was wrong. His Multi-lung sprung into action and everything started to get blurry.
He shook his head to clear his vision. It did not work.
He could feel both of his hearts beating and found it difficult to keep balance.

"Ah, it's gone. We can go again," Rainbow said, snickering.

It had sounded like from far away.

Antonius body started to feel numb and his hearts were beating at maximum. Antonius knew this procedure:
Emergency detoxification. If a Space Marine encountered a particularly devious poison that his body had problems handling, all organs were shut down, with only a few exceptions. The hearts and the Oolitic Kidney were set to maximum to get rid of the poison before it could cause serious harm.
That was what was happening now. He only had a few second before he would fall unconscious. He had to get away from this place, from those... flowers? The flowers. Probably.

He stumbled out of the patch and tried to get as far away as possible from those damned things.
He did not get far. He managed to clear the patch, but just a few meters later he fell to his knees.

"Hey, Antonius, is something wrong?" Rainbow asked from far away.

She did not snicker anymore, though.

Antonius toppled over and kept lying on the ground. He thought he heard hooves in the distance. Then, everything went black.

"Great! Just great!" was the first thing Antonius heard as he regained consciousness.

That was Applejack's voice.

"Poisoning him? Really? THAT WAS YOUR GREAT PRANK???"

Wow, Applejack sounded seriously angry.

"I did not mean to," Rainbow cried,
"Poison Joke is not dangerous, just... silly."

"Rainbow, perhaps you haven't noticed it, but... ANTONIUS IS NOT A PONY!!!"

Yep, Applejack was angry. Definitely.

Time to get up again.
He couldn't. In fact, he felt terrible. Had the detoxification not worked?

"Applejack, Rainbow Dash, his heart rate is slowing down again."

Huh? Rarity?

"That's a good sign, isn't it?" Rainbow asked.

"I don't know," Rarity answered.

"I'll better call Twilight," Applejack said.

"Whoa, don't rush things. He's tough. He'll be fine."

Antonius could almost hear Applejacks skeptic look.

"Uh, girls, his heart rate keeps slowing down, I think he's... umm... dying," Rarity told them.

Huh? Oh, yeah, right: The detoxification was not successful, so his Sus-an Membrane kicked in and put him to hibernation to prevent the poison from spreading and destroying his body.
Oh shit! He needed an Apothecarius to revive him! And there was none available!
If the ponies did not somehow find a way to revive him - low probability - he would stay in hibernation for centuries until he finally died. Or worse, Chaos would wake him up only to sacrifice him. An especially unworthy end.

"Applejack, call Twilight!" Rainbow shouted.

"Oh dear," Rarity thought aloud,
"I better start CPR... how did that work again?"

"CALL TWILIGHT! CALL TWILIGHT!!!" Rainbow cried.

"TWILIGHT! TWILIGHT!" Applejack shouted, probably into her vox.

Antonius did not hear the answer. Everything went black again. A stupid way to end one's life.

Much to his surprise, Antonius regained consciousness again. He still felt anything but well, but it was definitely better than the last time. Had the ponies found a way to wake him up? He had no idea. Unfortunately, he could not open his eyes, so he checked his other senses.
It was... warm. Quite comfortable, even. He thought he felt something, in front of him as well as behind him. Then, he heard a voice:

"Damnit, sister. This is an almost impossible task."

Luna!

"Just keep going, you'll make it."

Celestia.

"He's very deep in hibernation. I don't know if my attempts to wake up his mind are successful."

Oh, they were. Antonius still could not move, but he could hear and think - a bit slower than usual, but he was really content for the moment.

He felt the touch of Luna's mind again, dragging the command 'wake up' into every fiber of his soul.
Well, he was awake - more or less. Had she just listened for a second, she would probably have realized that, but she supposedly was to worried to do that. At least she sounded worried.

"Damnit! He just keeps sleeping. I think the bath should already have cleared the poison joke poisoning, but I simply can't put him back to a waking state. I just don't know what to do! I'm inadequate!" Luna complained.

Bath? That explained the warmth.

"Don't be too hard on yourself, Luna. We only know his species from fairytales," Celestia soothed her.

Fairytales? If someone called him 'Sleeping Beauty', he would run amok. Even while asleep.

"Fairytales? Fairytales! Sister, that gives me an idea!"

"Huh?"

"How do you awake sleeping ponies in fairytales?"

Well, good question. You... damned, his mind really was slow.

"You don't want to..." Celestia said.

So, she already knew the answer. And she was not too enthusiastic about it. Antonius kept thinking. You woke someone up by...
Oh. Uh-oh! She wouldn't really...

She would. She did.
Antonius could feel the touch on his lips. Just for a second, then it was over.
Strange experience.

"Hmm... did not work," Luna stated disappointedly.

"My surprise about that is somewhat limited," Celestia commented dryly.

"You are right, sister..."

Good.

"... the kiss should be adequate for his size."

WHAT THE HELL???
ABORT! ABORT!
Too late.

Whoa. Luna might have called it a kiss, Antonius called it an attempted tonsillectomy.
Making contact with pony saliva in that way was definitely the weirdest thing that ever happened to him, but it had an effect: The alien DNA reached his Omophagea and activated the implant. This sudden activity kick started the rest of body; he could feel the numbness vanish and his ability to move return, which meant... she had actually kissed him awake. Like in a fairytale.

Now, his attention was caught by the information his Omophagea transmitted to his brain.
This information was neither very extensive nor sophisticated - there had not been enough of Luna's DNA for that - but one thing was surprisingly clear: there was something strange about this DNA, although Antonius could not really put his finger on it. A little bit of it was somehow... sort of familiar, which did not make any sense. Of course, it was also possible that his Omophagea was malfunctioning, especially in his current condition.

Whatever, it was time to show the two alicorns that he was awake, so he tried to open his eyes. This time, it worked.
He looked into Luna's face and blinked. A huge smile crept onto her features. Suddenly, she grabbed him and pulled him into a bear hug.

"HUZZAH! HE'S AWAKE!" she shouted at an almost deafening volume.

"Luna! I'm happy, too, but please show your joy a little quieter - my ears are ringing," Celestia groaned.

"I feel compelled to agree with Tia," Antonius mumbled,
"that was loud. Thank you anyway."

"You are welcome!" Luna grinned and slowly ended the hug.

Antonius looked around to check his environment.

"We're at the Ponyville spa," Luna explained,
"in the central tub, to be exact."

"How long?" Antonius asked.

"How long we are here?"

"How long have I been unconscious?"

"Hmm... about 20 minutes."

Now Antonius was surprised.

"20 minutes? I expected my hibernation to be much, much longer. 20 minutes and you found a way to wake me up. Impressive."

"Isn't it?" Luna grinned.

Now Antonius realized something rather obvious:

"Are you sitting on my lap?" he asked.

Luna blushed.

"I had to keep the distance as short as possible to use my magic with optimum efficiency. Sorry."

"And, by the way, you are sitting on my lap," Celestia said from behind him,
"I kept you from drowning while Luna woke you up."

Well, under normal circumstances, he could not drown, thanks to his Multi-lung. Now... better safe than sorry, he guessed.

Now Antonius looked down his body, then at Luna again.

"Umm... of course I could be wrong, taken my current condition into consideration... but I'm fairly sure I put on some clothes before leaving Rarity's boutique."

Luna's blush deepened.

"I'm sorry, but we had to ensure that the antidote could circulate all of your body, so we... umm... sorry. Again."

"Hey, I don't think you have a reason to complain," Celestia said with a chuckle,
"you are the first one to take a bath with both ruling princesses of Equestria, after all."

"Oh, my joy knows no bounds," Antonius deadpanned,
"but now, it's time to get up again."

"Umm, Tony, you are still weak and half asleep. Better wait a few minutes," Luna opined.

"Oh, yeah?" Antonius said and grabbed Luna under her front legs.

Then, he lifted her - a few centimeters. The more of her body left the water, the heavier she got, up to the point when he could not raise her any more.

"Damnit," he muttered.

He should have been able to lift her completely out of the water, but he couldn't. Luna had obviously been right, he was quite weak at the moment. He sat her down again.

"Told you so," Luna said, worry written on her face.

Antonius felt uncomfortable. He was used to his strength, to his abilities. Now, he was an easy target, easily defeatable by just about anyone, not to mention the fact that he was inside a princess-sandwich. Fortunately, there was a way to change that.

"My armor," he said,
"fetch me my armor; it's in Rarity's boutique, behind that big curtain."

"Okay," Luna nodded.

She left the tub, quickly used a spell to force dry herself and left the spa. Antonius was still half hanging in Celestias grasp, half sitting on her lap. He had to admit that it was a little awkward.

"Enough of this lazing about," he decided,
"release me."

"Are you sure you won't sink?" she asked.

"I'm a Space Marine. Lying in bathtubs is not what we were made for."

"Okay, but please be careful."

Celestia loosened her grip and Antonius slid from her lap onto his knees. He almost toppled forward, but got hold of the rim of the tub. It was unbelievable: His arms and legs seemed to be heavier than ever and the world was turning around him.
What a day. He just had one goal now; to get into his armor. Until it came, he would use the time to get ready to don it.

Celestia watched Antonius slowly moving through the tub to the opposing rim.
It was hard to believe: This creature was a warrior without peer and had given her the beating of her lifetime - figuratively. Now, he could barely move. She just hoped that this condition was not permanent.
He reached the rim and started climbing over it.

"Umm, Antonius, are you sure this is a good idea?" she asked worriedly.

She got the answer when he toppled over and fell out of the tub. She rushed to him and saw him lying on the ground with a confused expression.

"Hmm... that could have gone better," he stated dryly.

"Probably," Celestia agreed with a forced smile,
"wanna come back into the tub?"

"After that much effort to get out? No thanks," he said and sat up.

Now, Luna came back, Antonius' armor in her magic grasp.

"Antonius, here is your... armor... What are you doing in front of the tub?"

"Drying," he answered flatly.

The princesses exchanged a worried glance, then they helped him get into his armor. It took them quite a few minutes, but as soon as he had donned it, he stood again without faltering.

"You are feeling better?" Luna asked,
"your hoofing - footing - seems to be much more stable now."

Antonius looked at her.

"The armor gives me stability. I'm still unnaturally tired. I need to go to a safe location to try and get rid of this weakness," he said.

"Canterlot?" Celestia suggested.

Antonius thought about that for a few seconds, then he nodded.

"My quarters. Quite far away, but the best solution."

"We should call Twilight and her friends before we leave. They were really worried about you."

Antonius nodded again, then he asked:

"How many ponies do know about my... sensitivity to that damn - how did you call it - poison joke?"

"Oh, you heard that?" Luna asked with some surprise,
"well, my sister and me, Twilight and her friends, Zecora - she is the source of the remedy - the owners of this spa and some ponies who have seen how we carried you here."

Antonius sighed.

"So, quite a lot of ponies know how to easily defeat me. Great, just great."

"They would never try to harm you!" Celestia exclaimed,
"furthermore, most of them don't really know what happened, and I have ordered everypony who knows to stay here and keep everything a secret. They won't talk about it."

"Hmm, quick-thinking. I would like this poison joke to be harvested, by the way."

"So that nopony can use it against you? I've already told you that..."

"That's just the bonus," Antonius interrupted,
"the main thing is that we might have found a weapon against the Word Bearers who will come sooner or later."

Celestia had to admit that she had not thought about that. She had been too busy thinking of ways to help Antonius.

"Good idea," she said,
"but now, I'd like to call Twilight and her friends."

"Okay," Antonius agreed.

Antonius was tired, more tired than he had ever been, but to maintain his reputation as a warrior, he had to hide that, so he stood perfectly upright, aided by his armor.

Celestia went to the door, opened it and told Twilight and her friends:

"My little ponies, you may come in n..."

She had not finished the sentence as they came running into the room, and they were not alone. Zecora, Lyra and Bon Bon were accompanying them.

"Antonius! We are very happy that you feel better!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Yeah, good to see you upright again," Applejack added.

"I told you he'd be fine, didn't I?" Rainbow grinned smugly.

That smile quickly vanished as everyone in the room glared at her. She seemed to shrink a bit, then she shouted:

"Okay! Okay! I know it was my fault! It was a stupid prank! I'm sorry!"

"Well," Antonius opined,
"it was stupid, careless, and almost disastrous. Luckily, there is a positive aspect to even this incident: If we can weaponize this poison joke, it might aid us greatly against the Word Bearers."

"See? So I..." Rainbow started, but her friends' glances made her think otherwise and she shut up again.

Antonius turned to Zecora:

"The remedy is from you? Do you have experience with such potions?"

"I'm used to work with a lot of plants,
some of my potions are quite advanced," Zecora answered.

"Can you distill the poison joke's agent into a volatile liquid?"

"You mean, build some kind of gas potion?
I've never done that, it's a new notion.
Be that as it may, I'll see it as test,
and I promise I will do my very best."

"Thank you."

He turned to the other ponies:

"I'm going to return to Canterlot now. I think you could say I 'take the rest of the day off'."

"That's not because you are mad at me, is it?" Rainbow asked.

"No, there is an important task waiting for me there."

"So, you're not angry?" Rainbow asked with a hopeful smile.

"Oh, I am angry," Antonius answered and Rainbow's face fell,
"believe it or not, but I do not like being tricked and poisoned. In the light of peaceful coexistence, though, and since you did not intend this to happen the way it happened, I won't take revenge on you. But if you should do something like that again, if you should ever try to 'prank' me again, I will show you what happens when I don't give a shit about 'peaceful coexistence', got that?"

"Umm... okay," Rainbow said ruefully.

"Yep. He's angry," Lyra commented quietly.

Antonius turned to her and her friend:

"Lyra, Bon Bon. I guess you have seen me when I was brought into the spa?"

"Umm... yes," Lyra answered,
"we have seen you in Ponyville and, well, we went to buy everything for lunch in case you wanted to join us again. Then we saw the princesses drag you into the spa and we knew something terrible had happened. Then, Rainbow told us what it was. Don't worry, we won't tell anypony. Well, umm, you don't want to stay for lunch, do you?"

Antonius smiled weakly at her and answered:

"No, thank you. I've got to go now."

It was high time; he could barely keep his eyes open now. He said goodbye, left the spa and stomped to the waiting chariot, followed by the ponies.

"He's not as well as he wants us to think he is," Fluttershy whispered behind him.

Oh, great. His attempts to appear fully recovered had been in vain.

"I know," Rarity agreed,
"I think he's still feeling awful."

Well, she wasn't exactly wrong. Still, Antonius turned around and said:

"Don't worry, I'm fine."

He turned back to the chariot and almost stumbled into the vehicle.

"Twilight, Spike," Celestia said,
"you may stay in Ponyville for a few days. Look to it that there are no rumors about today's incident. And make sure that the poison joke is not mentioned! Antonius was just sick, but he is fine again. I will send you a chariot when we need you in Canterlot again."

"Yes, Princess," Twilight answered.

Antonius and the princesses said goodbye and took off.
The flight to Canterlot seemed to take forever, but finally they reached the landing platforms. From there, they headed directly to Antonius' quarters.

Luna opened the door and Antonius walked in, followed by Celestia. Once the three of them were in the room, she immediately closed the door and sighed:

"Okay, we have arrived without incident. How do you feel?"

"Tired," Antonius answered,
"the aftereffects of the hibernation, since it was not terminated properly."

"I'm sorry, but..."

"No need to apologize. It's almost a miracle that you were able to wake me up again at all. Well done, really. Now, I think I'll take a nap to get rid of that fatigue."

"Are you sure that is the right way to treat your condition?"

"No idea," Antonius said and made a move to sit down on the ground.

"Hold on! We can't help you if you are inside that armor. You know, we don't have such a big can opener. Please don your pajamas before you lie down."

A little bit of humor to lighten the mood. It did not really work.

"Whatever... makes sense somehow..." Antonius mumbled and started stomping towards the bathroom.

"Do you need help?" Luna asked.

"No," Antonius answered and vanished into the bathroom.

"He really is in a bad condition," Celestia stated quietly.

"I know," Luna agreed,
"I just hope this nap is the right thing to do. I suggest we don't leave him alone until he has fully recovered."

"Agreed. Who will take the first shift?"

"Me. I'll monitor his sleep and make sure this hibernation does not kick in again."

"Okay, Luna. I'll relieve you in the afternoon."

Some time went by and Antonius still was in the bathroom. Luna became more worried with every second that passed.

"Perhaps we should go in and see if he's alright," she opined.

"Let's give him a few more minutes," Celestia suggested.

From her voice, Luna knew that her sister was almost as worried as she was.
Antonius left the bathroom a short time later, however, and staggered towards his bed.
He almost made it. Almost. He faceplanted into the carpet in front of the bed and fell asleep immediately.

"Damnit!" Luna mumbled and ignited her horn,
"guess we will have to put him to bed."

"Yes, but I think we shouldn't use more magic on him than absolutely necessary. Not until we know what exactly has caused his condition."

"We have also used magic to put him into the tub."

"Yes, but back then we were in a hurry. Now, we can afford the time to make this as cautious as possible."

The princesses went up to Antonius' sides and put his arms around their necks. Then, they slowly started lifting him.

"Umm... and now?" Luna asked.

"We just crawl into his bed and drag him with us," Celestia answered.

Unfortunately, it did not work.

"He must be weighing a ton," Luna complained,
"how about one of us getting below him and lifting him that way?"

"Worth a try," Celestia opined,
"I'll do it, I'm closer to his size than you are."

So Celestia crawled under Antonius so that he was lying on her back, then she crawled into his bed. Luna held him in place and watched for his legs. Finally, Antonius was lying in his bed.

"We've done it, sister!" Luna smiled.

"Not yet," Celestia disagreed,
"if you take a look, you'll see that he's still lying on me. You are right, he must weigh a ton. Now get him off me!"

Luna snickered.

"Try to crawl forward, I'll lift him a bit."

It took Celestia some time, since Antonius was not really easy to lift, but soon her front half was free again. Then...

"Celestia! He's slipping from my grasp! Hurry!"

Too late. Antonius' head plunged into the fur of Celestia's rear. Her expression was hilarious! Luna burst out laughing.

"Not funny, sister," Celestia grumbled,
"this is very undignified. Lift him again, now!"

"So no big, sunny cushion for him?"

"LIFT HIM!"

Luna did so, still grinning, and Celestia finally got free.

A short time later, both princesses were standing next to Antonius' bed. He was lying prone, covered with a blanket and peacefully sleeping.

"What do you think, should we turn him over to his back?" Luna asked, still smiling,
"or do you want to enact your revenge by slamming your face into his..."

"Luna!" Celestia hissed,
"this accident is not to be mentioned ever again!"

"Pity. But anyway, should we turn him over?" Luna asked.

"I think he's fine," Celestia answered,
"I'll leave now, but I've got my vox with me. If you need my help, do not hesitate to call me. Oh, I almost forgot: Even if the situation is tempting, you should better keep your hooves off him. He'll need his energy for regeneration."

Having said that, she quickly left and Luna was alone with the sleeping Antonius.
Luna stared at the closed door.

What? Damnit, that was her sister's revenge for the 'cushion' joke. Ever since that one night when they had met in the kitchen, she just loved to tease her about her relationship with Antonius. They were just good friends, but Celestia had a lot of fun implying there was a bit more to it.

"There is no more to it," Luna told the sleeping Antonius,
"we are just friends. Good friends, but just friends. We have never done anything indecent, after all. Okay, I removed your clothes. And then I kind of sat on your lap. But you are okay with this, are you not?"

Antonius did not object, he just kept sleeping. Luna sat down next to his bed, put her head next to his and took a look into his mind, using just as much magic as absolutely necessary. There was no sign of this hibernation. He really was just sleeping. Luna sighed.

"An exciting day, wasn't it?" she mumbled with a smile and continued monitoring him.

For about four hours nothing happened. Antonius did not move, but there was no sign of him starting to hibernate again.
Then, he started moving his arm. He came upon Luna's neck and dug his fingers into her fur. Luna smiled. He was still sleeping, this move had been completely subconscious. Just as the little smile that had appeared on his face. He was fine.
Luna had to admit that it was a strangely comfortable feeling, and as the tension started falling off of her, she realized how tired she was herself. However, she kept monitoring him, and she kept his hand on her neck. She could not wait for his face when he woke up and realized that he was petting her in his sleep!

That happened an hour later. His hand on her neck started moving, but stopped immediately. Then, it started fumbling up and down her neck for a few seconds. Finally, Antonius opened his eyes a bit. Luna smiled at him, her head still next to his, and his eyes were completely open at once. His expression was hilarious!

"Umm... Good morning, Luna... or good afternoon? Goodnight? How long did I sleep?" he asked confusedly.

"About five hours, so it's 'good afternoon'," Luna told him.

"Okay... and why am I petting your neck?"

"Heart's desire?"

Antonius just stared at her and she started laughing.

"Don't worry, you just grabbed me while you were sleeping. The rest of me is sitting on the carpet in front of your bed, by the way."

"I can't remember going to bed..."

"That's because you only reached the carpet. My sister and I tucked you in."

"Oh?"

"Yes. Was not too difficult. Just Celestia got a bit... stuck."

"'Stuck'? I am not sure if I want to hear that story."

"I was able to help her get free again. No worries."

Antonius nodded and put his hand away from her neck, then he turned on his back and sat up. He seemed to feel much better now.

"How do you feel?" Luna asked compassionately to make sure.

"As good as new, I think," Antonius answered and got up,
"yeah, I'm feeling fine. No trace of fatigue."

"I'm happy to hear that," Luna smiled.

Antonius stretched, then he froze. Luna cold tell from his facial expression that something was wrong. Before she could ask what it was, he took off his pajama jacked and swiped over his chest with his hand. Then, he examined that hand.

"What's wrong?" she finally asked.

Antonius showed her his hand. She took a close look at it, then she told him truthfully:

"I can't see anything, just your hand."

"That's it," he answered,
"do you remember what I told you about my Mucranoid?"

"Oh, your sweat-yourself-clean-thingy?"

"Yeah, that."

"Well, you said you exude some oil that... hey, wait a second... there is no oil on your hand!"

"Exactly," Antonius grumbled,
"my Mucranoid seems to be defective. That means no more self-cleaning, and no advanced resistance to extreme temperatures."

"Is that all?"

"I really think that's enough."

"Well, to be honest, you can use a tub or a shower to clean yourself, and the temperatures here are not that extreme, so it's not that bad after all."

Antonius regarded her for a long second, then he told her:

"Maybe the impact isn't that serious, but the fact that one of my implants has stopped working is unsettling."

"Can't we somehow start it again?"

"Not without an apothecarius."

Luna thought about that. This Mucranoid-thingy was more or less useless around here, but if she was on an alien planet, cut off from proper medical care and a part of her body failed... yes, that was an unsettling thought.

"Be that as it may," Antonius continued,
"I'll get back into my armor. Can't run around like this."

"Okay. I'll call my sister and tell her you are awake again."

Antonius went into the bathroom and Luna voxed her sister.

"I'm on my way," Celestia answered.

When Antonius left the bath again, Luna told him:

"My sister is..."

She yawned.

"... coming."

"Tired?" Antonius asked.

Luna nodded.

"I'm way past my bedtime, and with all that magic and worrying..."

She yawned again.

"Thank you for your help, Luna, but now you should probably go to bed. I'm fine."

"No. First, we have got to talk to my sister."

Now that the tension had fallen off of her, she was barely able to keep her eyes open. Well, perhaps she should close them, just for a second or two...

She fell asleep.

Antonius caught Luna just as she toppled over. He put her into his bed and tucked her in. While he was doing this, Celestia arrived.

"I see you two have changed parts," she said witha warm smile,
"how do you feel, Antonius?"

"Better," he answered.

"Better or really well again?"

"I'm fine."

"Thank goodness. Luna and I were honestly worried about you."

"Thank you for your help."

"You're welcome. Now, we should call Twilight and her friends and tell them you're alright again."

Celestia took our her vox and called Twilight. She responded immediately.

"Hello, Princess Celestia?"

"Hello Twilight. I called to tell you that Antonius is fine again."

"Thank goodness. We were really worried about him."

Celestia smiled.

"So were we. Please tell you friends there is no reason to worry anymore."

"They already heard the good news."

"Oh, apropos news: Are there any rumors about this incident?"

"Well, in fact, yes, there is a rumor."

Great. He could lose his reputation if it became known that a simple plant, rather harmless to ponies, had been able to fell him, and he needed this reputation for commanding the PDF. Not to speak of the fact that everyone was now able to easily defeat him. Not a nice thought.

"Have you been able to contain it?" Celestia asked.

"I don't think that is necessary, Princess," Twilight opined,
"the rumor is that Antonius got severely ill, but it took him just half an hour to defeat that illness that would probably have killed a pony."

What?

"Does the rumor mention the poison joke?" Celestia inquired.

"No, Princess, not at all."

"Thank you, Twilight. Please keep vigilant. Celestia, out."

Antonius turned to Celestia:

"It seems that this once, a rumor even works in our favor."

"Indeed. Now, what are you going to do with the rest of the day?"

"I'll stay here and revise my first draft of the history of mankind."

"Okay, Antonius," Celestia said, and turned to leave. When she had just passed the door, she turned around again and added with a smile:

"I hope my sister's snoring won't distract you too much."

Then she was gone and Antonius took a look at Luna. Why did he suddenly have the idea of a big white cushion for her head? He shook his head and fetched his data slate.

Antonius managed to finish his work until Stormy came back from school. When asked about his day, he told her the rumor that ran through Ponyville to keep this story consistent. Later, after dinner, when the little mare was in bed and Luna was awake again, he met the princesses in Celestia's quarters.

"Antonius," Celestia started,
"I've been thinking about your... sensitivity towards poison joke. Please tell me exactly what happened."

Antonius did her the favor and described the events as detailed as he could.
Celestia thought about his words for a little while, then she said:

"I think this is some kind of allergy. Poison joke is not dangerous, but your body reacted to it as if it was dangerous and your defenses ran amok."

"I think you can call it that," Antonius agreed a bit hesitantly,
"so, I actually am allergic to something."

"Then the reason for your defective Muk... Mucr... thingy is not really the plant, but you own body?" Luna asked Antonius.

"Defective what?" Celestia asked worriedly,
"Antonius, you told me you were fine!"

"Oops," Luna said sheepishly.

"Mucranoid," Antonius sighed and told Celestia about his implant.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Celestia asked.

"I'm not used to hawk my weaknesses around," Antonius answered.

"Don't worry, I'll keep it a secret. At least we have learned that we probably can use poison joke as a weapon against those Chaos Space Marines."

"And I have learned that I hate pranks," Antonius added a bit sourly.

"Oh, you shouldn't," Luna opined,
"a good prank can be very funny. My sister and I love pranks! I tell you something: we will play a harmless prank on you within the next few days. Then you can decide if you really hate pranks in general or just Rainbow Dash's prank."

"Can I persuade you to let that be?" Antonius asked.

"Not a chance!" both princesses smiled.