Hey guys! Static Wielder here! And I just realized something... something very life changing. It's that I don't have a religion. No don't get me wrong! Please don't go as low as to call me an atheist! It's just... I hate all Christian morals and methods. Stuff like that. I still believe their is a god (I actually believe in multiple gods.) and I understand the teachings of Jesus... but I think the truth has been lost. You know?

If God's holy word was so amazing... so breathtaking... so powerful, then how can we understand it? How could it have been translated to a mere sentence in the bible? And then I tell that to someone and if he responds 'Oh you're gonna go to hell!' OH MY GOD! I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE THESE DAYS! *sigh* I'm yelling through a fucking keyboard because I don't want to yell at another person! I'd hurt their feelings... bah. Time for the story to continue.

The cave was dark... it was a very large cave too. And inside it... it felt like time stood still. But Twilight and I could see just fine. Cat eyes! But if it get's too dark, then I need a lamp or a flashlight or something. If you spend enough time in the dark, then you can see everything all around you just fine. That is true in my case, but I haven't spent enough time in it yet.

"I'm wondering how this cave was formed." I asked Twilight, carefully stepping over a cliff.

"It doesn't say in the book." She was really into that book. "It says here that this was the quickest way for anamorphs to get around."

"Get around where?"

"To Canterlot. Their are thousands of entrances. Most of them have been destroyed however."

"But not all of them." The entire time down here, I was playing with the mask I had. I wasn't sure about putting it on. Twilight stayed beside me, not losing sight of me. I kept on walking till I saw a large white light. It was a structure built down here. Their was an elevator to take up to Canterlot. But it was invisible to the regular human naked eye. "Twilight, do you see this?" I asked pushing the button to open the door.

"I do. I had no idea! Dustin this is amazing!" the door opened to show the elevator had been destroyed. No doubt by King Faust. But he left a latter. "What do we do?"

"...Well..."

"Dustin, it's going to be a really long climb."

"Then hold on to my neck and keep reading the book." I said crouching, letting Twilight get on my back. I walked into the shaft and started to climb the elevator, one handlebar at a time.

In the future...

"I love exploring." I told myself as I teleported to the cave I found. Isn't shadow magic just the best? I walked down the cave looking for signs on how to either A. Find the empire. Or B. Kill Sombrero for good. Yeah I know I know... Twilight and I agreed to not split up, but I can't help myself! So I brought them with me!

"So the book said that the door we found in the village was just a trap." Twilight said.

"How do you know?" Rarity asked. "I mean, whoever wrote that might be lying."

"Well it says here 'First door was a trap.' Then their is a bloodstain and a page that describes a majority of the team dying. The next page says, 'Am in process of being frozen. Can't find cave.' Does that answer your question?"

"Not quite. Dustin, my good man, where did you find the book."

"Lightning found it and it was inside some ice. With a dead body." I stopped when I saw a Hydra sulking about. "Shh... Hydra."
[Do we kill it or just sneak past it?]
<I choose kill. Just to be safe.>
"I'm going to kill it. No one tell Fluttershy, got it?" They all nodded in approval. I ran around the corner to see that the shadow had fooled me. It was just a baby frost hydra. "D'awww... ain't you the cutest little monster?" I asked putting my blade away and picking it up.

"It's so adorable! And a magnificent shade of blue, I might add!" Rarity said taking it away from me.

"Ah don't think we should keep it, ya'll." Applejack said. Her honesty was telling the truth once again.

"Rarity, we can't keep it. The mother might be around somewhere and we don't need that kind of attention." I whispered pulling my sword back out. I heard a loud moan.

"Rarity put it down!" Twilight whispered back.

"Alright, go home now little cutie." She put the hydra back down, which turned around climbed back up into her arms. "Oh I can't keep you! Spike and I already have Pee-wee!"

"I got this." Lightning picked it up and pushed it away from her. We kept on walking down the cave while the baby followed us.

"What do we do?" Niko whispered.

"Nothing. Just ignore it." Applejack said.

At this time... only back in 2014...

"*pant* I...*pant*...don't know why their are so many handle bars."

"Do you want me to climb?" Twilight asked. We were almost to the top. Now I've always wandered why their was a hole in the bottom of Canterlot, and you couldn't touch it because of a force-field. Well this elevator tube is exactly why. After about 20 more steps, we made it to the top.

"Well I got my exercise for the day."

"Good?"

"Very... very good." we sat at the top and Twilight forced me to drink from a water bottle. We walked until we found a sewer duct. I was in a hurry so when I lifted it up and jumped out, I bashed my head on something. "Ow fuck!"

"You okay?"

"I'm fine. Be careful getting out." I said pulling myself from underneath the carriage. It was very dark outside. I think the curfew is still in order, but I'm going to hope not. I looked at the logo on the side and grumbled to myself. "Property of Trixie Lulamoon... You shall here a complaint from me Trixie. Trixie? TRIXIE!" Oh god dammit, why of all people, did I run into her carriage?
[Maybe you two are meant to be together.]
<I doubt that, she couldn't fuck us and we were tied up Beta.>
(And we were in a girl's body too.)
[Didn't she see you naked?]
<How do you know she didn't have her way with you? You were a girl and she was a dude.>

"Dustin, you okay?" Twilight asked while climbing out from underneath.

"I'm gonna puke..." I said walking away from the carriage. "It's nothing though. I'm fine."

"So what is our plan?"

"Well... let me think on that."

"We can go find the others."

"That's probably our best bit." We walked to an intersection when a larger guard than before came marching towards us. "Quick! Hide behind me!" I pushed Twilight behind my back and tucked my ears in my hair. Someone must've called the authorities.

"Stop right there criminal scum!" he shouted. I put a firm grip on Twilight and she hugged me tightly. "I mean it! Don't move!" Shit... looks like this is the end for me. "Where do you think you're going?" he asked the guy beside me. It was just a tired dude eating a bagel.

"What?" he asked with a full mouth. "I'm eating a fucking bagel. You gonna take away my right to eat?"

"Let me see some I.D."

"*sigh* This is the 5th fucking time this week! You can't keep harassing me!"

"By orders of her majesties-"

"You've come to take me in! Blah blah blah! Why don't you fuck off pal?"

"Twilight..." I whispered.
"Hmm?"
"We're gonna leave. Take my hand, hide your ears and tail, and act casual."
"I'll try." she held on to my right hand tightly and hid her tail under her skirt. We walked in the other direction, not from the one he came in. We walked back towards the manhole we left from. He followed us unfortunately.

"Hey, you two!" the giant beast shouted. He was absolutely massive. "Where are you two suppose to be?"

"Uh..."

"With me!" A girl said behind us. "They're friends of mine."

"Trixie, you had best be telling the truth."

"I promise. If you have a problem then go take it up with Celestia."

"I'm keeping my eye on you two." he said before walking away.

"What are you two thinking being out in the open past curfew like this?"

"We...um...didn't know Ms. Trixie."

"It's Lulamoon. Ms. Lulamoon. And just call me Trixie."

"I'm-"

"Dustin Shafer and Twilight Sparkle. I never forget a face. Well come on... " she lead us back to her carriage and let us inside.

"You seem...nicer than last time." I asked her.

"No I still hate you both. I just felt bad for the things I've done to you. And when you both disappeared... I never got to apologize. So in return I'll let you rest here for a day."

"We appreciate it Trixie." Twilight said happily.

"Don't mention to anybody. I have a reputation to keep up."

"Oh...o-okay."

"Lighten up Twilight!" she reached over and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. "So tell me... what's your secret?"

"Hm?"

"How is it that you look like you haven't aged a day? Hell your bust hasn't even grown!"

"Oh my...um...well..." she lightly touched the tips of her fingertips together.

"It's...seaweed." I said out loud.
(What the hell? I didn't mean to say that!)
<Just let me talk for you.>
"Just wrap yourself in seaweed and take a mud bath. It'll make you look 2 and a half years younger."

"Really? I haven't tried that. I'll give it a shot."

"Thanks for the save." Twilight whispered.

"No problem."
(Alpha!)
<What?>
(Thanks for saving the day man.)
<Yeah yeah, just don't dance in celebration. Yeah, that's right. I've seen you dance. You're almost as bad as Twilight.>
[Well she did win that DDR championship, remember?]
<But Dance Dance Revolution isn't real dancing. Yeah she can move her feet around really fast, but she can't dance!>
(Don't you talk bad about my wife! I'll choke you with my mind!)
[Dustin you can't do that.]
(I know! I've tried already!)
<Ahahahaha...wait... are you being serious?>

"Trixie, is this really okay? Us staying here I mean."

"It's fine. And uh...Twilight? I hate to ask, but do you have a tail, or am I drunk?"

"You're drunk!" we both said at the same time.

"Oh...hehehe...then I should probably sleep..." she put the bottle away and laid sideways on her chair falling into a quick sleep. Twilight gently pulled the blanket over her and smiled.

"She really saved us."

"Hahaha... And Trixie of all people."

"Times have really changed."

"Let's get as much rest as we can right now. Tomorrow, we look for our friends."

"I'm cold."

"Then come here." I opened my coat. "This new coat is actually really warm."

"Mm...it is." She snuggled onto me and I wrapped us up. "Dustin...I'm sorry for everything that's happened."

"It's going to be fine. It'll all be fine in the end. Let's just enjoy being alive for now. Apparently, that's a luxury now a-days."

"*giggle* Okay. Wake me up when it's time to...go..." she passed out immediately. How long has Twilight been awake? I mean I know she's weaker, since the near death experience from earlier, but... I've just worn the poor girl out. She needs a good rest.

In the future...

"I'm getting tired." Niko huffed.

"Oh come on. You need the exercise!"

"I just want to do this as quickly as possible..."

"Niko, I'm sure Dawn will be fine. You said the baby was due at the end of the week, and it's only Tuesday. Relax already man. Right?" I turned around to see the others pretty far behind. "Hey guys!" I shouted too them. They didn't move an inch. "Niko are you seeing this?" I turned around to see he was perfectly still as well.

"Hah hah hah hah... did you really think you could defeat me?" The evil king asked, manifesting in my face. "Come now Shafer. You can't expect to beat me without a fight, right?"

"Oh I wouldn't dream of it."

"In order to defeat me, you must prove yourself in the...*duhn duhn!* Rooms of Terror!"

"I'm sorry, but did I hear dramatic noises?"

"You must get through the 3 Rooms of Torture in order to find the heart of the empire, but be warned, it's not easy." He snapped a finger and made everyone else disappear. "And you must do it alone!"

"Where did you send them?"

"Back to the village. I don't want them to miss what I'm going to do to you when I have my revenge."

"Yeah yeah... so where are these rooms?"

"That a-way." he pointed to the hole in the wall. I shrugged and ran inside it.
<It's got to be a trap!>
(Well... I imagine the Rooms of Terror not sounding like Roses on top of... Titties.)
[You tried to find another title with ROT in it?]
(At least I'm trying! You make a sweet title with 3 letters!)
[...Ripe Orange Tangelos.]
(Oooh... that does sound good.)
"You win this round tangelos!"

"What are you talking to?" Sombra asked.

"...Shut the fuck up Sombrero." I tripped and fell down the cave, hitting every rock on my way down. "Oof! Did I win yet? *neck popping back into place* Oh there we go..."

"Welcome to the first room! Take off your boots!"

"What?"

"And socks. You'll get them at the end of the room."

"Alright." he zapped them and sent them to the other side of the cave. The space between here and their was pitch black. "So... what's the challenge?"

"Walk to the other side."

"Is that it? Seriously? Well that doesn't sound to-OW SHIT! What the fuck!" I held my foot in pain. "I know this pain... Sombra, you sick bastard!"

"Ahahahaha!" He cut on a light showing the room! The entire floor was made of Legos. "Their is no greater pain than stepping on a lego."

"I hate you." I jumped back into the room. "Ow! Owie! OW OW OW! Why would you do this?! Oh my god! This hurts so bad... Oh I can't stand it! This is the worst fucking- Oh hey I made it across."

"Dammit!"

"Time for the next room!" I threw the socks in the air, flipped upside down, let them fall on my feet perfectly, and stuff them back in my boots.

"How...How did you do that?"

"NEXT ROOM!"

"This room is almost impossible to pass through. No one has gotten past it..."

"What is that?" I asked pointing to the jar with over 20 dead skeletons surrounding it.

"It's a jar. Inside it is a key. These people have died attempting to get the key."

"What else is in it?"

"Barbed wire, salt, lemon juice, shaving razors, poison, and a bear trap!"

"Why would you keep these things together?"

"You'll never figure out how to get the key! Bwahahahaha!"

(It's a jar right?)
[Is it open?]
(Mm hmm.)
[And is it made of glass?]
(Yep.)
[Jar.]
<Is Sombra really being serious? Wow... he's the lamest villain ever."

"I'm ashamed to call you another version of myself Sombra!"

"Why is that? Have you given up?" I held the jar in the air. "What are you doing?" I turned it around and dumped all the contents out, and pulled the key from the pile of barbed wire and the bear trap. Now I was impressed about how he got that in there, but I was disappointed about how many people were killed by this simple test. "No! It's impossible! No one has gotten the key before!"

"This is ridiculous."

"I know! You're suppose to be dead!"

"Now I know why Celestia said you were a waste of time. You're not even a reincarnation of me! You're just another shadow magic user! And you want to know something else? You're the worst one I've seen yet."
<Ohhhh snap! You ain't got nothin' on us!>
[Suck it you used up BITCH!]

"Grrr... you still have one more test left." He pointed to the door against the wall. "Continue." I did what he asked and pushed the door open. It was a large column with thousands of stairs leading up it. "Hahahaha! Stairs! I love stairs!"

"...Well I'm impressed."

"Really?"

"I did not know how low a bad guy could go. Well done Sombrero-"

"SOMBRA! IT'S KING SOMBRA!"

"...What made you love stairs so much? Did you, like, play with a slinky this entire time or what?"

"That's none of your business!" he had a massive blush.

"Gravity spell." I jumped on the bottom of the stairs and started to slide down it.

"NO!"

"I figured you'd learn from this by now! AHAHAHA!"
[He's catching up pretty quick.]
<You know what time it is?>
"It's sliding on stairs time!" I summoned my guitar and started to play the Wild Stallion theme from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. "YEAH! Oh... whoops... summoned Clementine. Didn't mean to do that."

"I'm going to kill you!"

"No your not. ALPHA WAVE!" I combined with Alpha and moved down the stairs at least 5 times faster, leaving Sombra in the dust. At the top, I found the crystal heart. I turned the guitar into a scythe, hooked the blade around it, and pulled it towards me in-case of a trap.

"Well you made it here, but you won't ever make it out!" I jumped inside of his shadow. "Where'd you go?" And I teleported back to the town hall.

"Dustin! We thought we lost you!" Twilight cried jumping into my arms.

"What? I'd never leave my girl hanging. Oh hey, I found this." I held up the heart. "Bring back memories?"

"What is that exactly?" Rarity asked. "It's absolutely beautiful!"

"It's the heart of the Crystal Empire!" Twilight said happily.

"Then where's the empire?" Lightning asked. We all heard the ground shake.

"Good timing."

Back in 2014...

"*gasp* Huh?" I woke up when I heard a bottle get smashed outside. I was extremely tense, and very easy to startle in my current state of shock. I looked to my right to see Trixie was still drunk and passed out.

"...Father." I looked down to see Twilight crying in her sleep.

"Hey... wake up."

"Huh?" she asked as I was lightly shaking her.

"You were having a nightmare." she reached up and wiped her tears. "Twilight, I'm sorry."

"So am I. I didn't even get to say goodbye, I was so focused on getting to you."

"It's Discord's fault."

"We don't know that! We don't know how my parents or Cody died yet. Who else could have gotten killed?"

"Let's not think about that. Let's just find our friends."

"You're right! We can't just sit back and cry about things that have already happened!"

"Because we cannot change the past!"

"We can only change the future!" Now were both full of energy.

"Keep it down..." Trixie mumbled.

"Well be off now Trixie. Thank you for the assistance." I said ruffling her hair.

"Mm...Bye."

"Bye." Twilight gave her a hug and ran out the door with me. "Well it was nice of her to help us."

"Yes it was. Do we have everything?"

"Yep, I just checked."

"Okay. Well... we found Niko, and he's a security guard around here."

"Maybe he can help us around the city."

"Maybe... I'd say we could go talk to Celestia and Luna, but... I don't want to risk it."

"Look over there!" she pointed to a store. "The Carousel Boutique."

"Rarity?"

"Rarity." I shrugged and walked with Twilight to the store, hoping for some answers.
[Maybe if we ask nicely, she'll give us the full treatment.]
<Hey! Rarity is not a whore! She's a lady!>
[...What the hell are you thinking? We need some boots and pants to match the overcoat.]
(And maybe something underneath the coat if it's too cold.)
[Like a matching vest!]
(And maybe we'll get a discount!)
<...I can't believe what I am hearing.>

I stopped walking when we got there and I began to think to myself that something else was wrong here. It was obviously the castle. It just felt... different. Like it was kinder and happier than before, but it was also hiding something. Maybe it had something to do with Cody's death. Oh goddamn curiosity!

"Twilight, I'm going to check out the castle."

"What? But we just got here!"

"You talk to them, find out where the others are. Just listen to your instincts. Tell me that something is just wrong about the castle."

"Well...now that you mention it... it does seem different."

"Exactly."

"Then be careful and meet me here in a half-an-hour. Got it?"

"I got it." She moved up and we kissed. I watched Twilight walk inside the store and happily talk to her friends. But now I had come to realize the position I was in. An assassin. A tool for death. Now I don't know why this is all happening so fast, but I do know that I have to find out why. So I equipped the mask, pulled up the hood on the coat, and slowly made my way to the castle. I used the shadows to make my way to the garden and then I climbed up into the open window.

"Is someone there?" A person asked looking around the books. I saw it was Luna. Now I'm not going to kill her. This is a person who I've always looked up to. And here I was, sulking in the shadows, with a sword in my hand. The times have really changed.

"It's just your imagination." said another voice, which I recognized as Murphy, my chemistry teacher.

"Grimm, I'm serious, I did hear something." So was he always Grimm? I mean, Sombra talked about it in Equestria. "Must be a rat." When she turned around, I went to another bookcase and made my way around her. I didn't want to use up all my magic energy right now. "So this is impressive."

"What is?"

"This, in father's journal. He speaks of people with animal traits. Anamorphs, he dubs them. He said that they were the hardest workers of all, and the most magically talented. They had royal blood in their veins, and in order to control them... he executed them."

"Faust did? Why haven't I heard of this?"

"He must have done it before you came to Earth."

"Cheeky bastard." I need to get this journal. Problem is... how? I put the sword up and dashed out of the library I was in. I would come back for it. I ran along the carpet, not the tiles, to muffle my footsteps and made my way to Celestia's bedroom. It smelled like bananas... though. I mean I do like bananas... but I never loved them this much. But I must find answers. And I bet Celestia has all of them.

(Let's go through her things.)
[...This might be fun after all.]
<I bet you the answer is in her diary.>

So I looked for a diary in the princess's room. I checked under the pillow, the nightstand, under the bed, but no diary. So I went to the drawer and opened that. Inside I found dresses, sexy lingerie, a photo album, and a large journal. But it was locked.

(Oh goddamn it!)
<It's reasonable to keep a lock on your diary dude.>
(But she could've made it easier in our case.)
[Shut up and find the key.]
(Hmm...if I was a key, where would I be? Oh!) I stood on the edge of the bed to look on the top of the cover and I found a keyring. (Aha!)

I quietly went through the keys and opened the journal. I flipped through the pages, scanning each one for things I'd want to read. I also hid in the shadows behind the drawer in case she came looking for it, so I could easily re-lock it and place it back in the shelf.

'Entry 63... There still hasn't been any signs or reports of Twilight. I fear for my faithful student, that something horrible has happened to her. Still I had no way to provide for my suspicions...'
(Ugh... even her writing has this elegant way of words.)
<That or you're feeling guilty about going through her diary.>
(Moving on...)
'Entry 64... One of our most loyal of soldiers, named Cody Shafer, has been captured and imprisoned. He has been hiding the fact that he is an anamorphic human. My father and mother plan to execute him this evening, for everyone to watch! Such an act hasn't been done for ages! If he does this... then I fear for what punishment he could face.'

I don't know if I can keep reading. This is... terrible news. But I must continue! I have to learn for why Faust would kill my brother. Cody was a good soldier, one of the best! There is no way he would ever betray his king or country! Not even if it meant sparing MY life! He was the most loyal soldier in this forsaken army... so why kill him?

'Entry 65... Shafer was executed. He didn't cry. He didn't complain. He only wished to serve his king, to show that he was a good person. His death was executed in public. I am afraid that it has sparked a rebellion. I also fear for Dustin Shafer. I know his secret as well. I promised to never tell my father, because Dustin is one of the greatest people I know. He's also the only one who can protect Twilight Sparkle, wherever she is. So I need his trust.

But Dustin was the only member in his family who could use magic. Well actually Lilith knows magic, but she hides it unlike her twin. Now when word of this gets to him... I'm scared that he'll do something drastic.'

Well your suspicions are correct princess. If I wasn't here, then I'd kill Faust myself. Nobody...FUCKS with my family! I went to read the next chapter but I heard someone walking towards the door. I relocked the journal/diary, put it back in the drawer, put the keys where I found them, and jumped inside the shadow.

"Luna, you're being paranoid." Celestia told her sister.

"Something felt wrong. I felt a strong presence enter the library, and I heard the sound. The sound of someone's feet."

"Was it your own?"

"I don't think so."

"Then continue."

"Well that's just the thing. Both you and Grimm say that I am being paranoid."

"Have a seat." both of the girls sat on the bed, right above me. I mean, sure I'm in the shadow, but it scared me so I moved to the closet. "...*sigh* Luna I don't know how much longer we can keep up good relations with the Griffon tribe."

"We must try harder than dear sister."

"Father and Mother were much better rulers than I."

"Don't say that. You are so much better! You didn't try to wipe out an entire race like they did!"

"I just wish I knew why."

"We've allowed Anamorphs to re-enter society."

"But it's still not enough. It'll never be enough."

"Sister...Tia... you must have faith in yourself."

"Yes, dear sister. Let us go attend to whatever else we must." they both left the room. Celestia just announced that she didn't know why her father did this, so I should move back to the library and get that journal. I checked my watch quickly to see that it's almost been a half-an-hour. I promised Twilight I'd be back. So I teleported all the way to the Boutique using up a majority of my energy.

I walked inside the building, and was confronted by the people I call my friends. It was obvious that they knew who I was the second I walked in by the amount of times I heard my name, and the hugs I received.

"You've grown Dustin!" Rarity said looking up. She was right, I had grown a couple of inches. But I didn't feel any different. I looked at Spike who resembled a grown man now.

"Oh...hahahaha!" I couldn't help but laugh when he picked me up. "Down boy!"

"But I missed you guys so much!" Oh no... he's getting teary eyed. No if he cries then I'm gonna cry. I mean it's bad enough that I've tried to hold it in this much, even with Cody and Pal gone. "It's just that I was worried sick." he put me down. "Thank you for keeping Twilight safe. With Mom and Dad gone and Shining at work all the time, Twilight is my only family left."

"I'm sorry about what I've put you through Spike." Twilight said.

"We already talked about this, it's okay now because your safe and sound." I was eavesdropping on them, trying to find out what the hell they were talking about when Rarity asked a question.

"So Dustin, when did you marry Twilight?"

"WHAT?" We both said at the same time.

"You have matching rings, different colored crest inside them, and Twilight. You've been keeping something between your legs this whole time. I imagine it being a tail."

"She's right!" Spike said pulling up Twilight's skirt.

"Hey! Stop!" she cried as he started to tickle her. I smiled and sat down in the couch beside Rarity after she closed all the windows and closed the store.

"It's an old agreement called the Shadow Pact."

"Tell me more."

"It's an holy sacrament, it was used back in the beginning of times actually, between two lovers. It was how magicians use to get married, but now only a few know how to do it."

"Why this and not a regular marriage?"

"Ah, a good question. One, it was a lot cheaper, It only cost me a pint of blood and the tiger stripes from my ears and tail." I said showing her my now pitch black tail which matched Twilight's.

"Oh I loved your stripes!"

"Speaking of stripes..." I handed her Pal's collar. "Sir Pounce-a-Lot apparently passed away. Could you fix up this collar for me?"

"Ohh... woe is me! I loved that little kitty so so soooo much!" she hugged the collar and cried in it. "I'm so sorry Dustin."

"It's okay. He's probably in heaven with Cody."

"I saw that. When he was executed in public. It was horrendous! Such an act cost Faust his life, ironically."

"What do you mean?" Twilight asked.

"Faust killed Cody because he was anamorphic. Then Faust and his wife were assassinated some time after. I've been able to get this much information. Oh! I also learned that Anamorphs don't need to hide in public anymore. So you can show your ears and tail."

"Oh so that's why you weren't hiding it when you walked in."

"Exactly. Now back to the original question Rarity. The Shadow Pact. We both share the same blood now. I had royal blood in my veins... you see and-"

"So that's why King Faust tried to kill the entire race! He doesn't deserve to be king, your ancestors were suppose to rule, right?"

"H-how do you know that?"

"I can tell from your facial expressions. Also Twilight showed me your family history." I looked over at the girl who gave me a sheepish smile. I nodded and mouthed 'Thanks for making this easier on me' which surprised her actually.

"Right then... the next reason as to why I married Twilight was because she was injured, stabbed by the king we fought in Equestria. So by doing this agreement, I managed to save her life. Also their are a few more perks with royal blood."

"Like what?" Spike asked. I opened my wings which made him jump. "That's awesome!"

"Oh and we're immortal Twilight."

"What? I didn't know that." Twilight said.

"Apparently that's how blood works."

"Well, I don't need a royal Shadow Pact to get married. All I need is Spiky-wiky..." Rarity said while making out with the large boy.

"How old is he now?" I asked Twilight while they were distracted.

"He's our age!"

"Amazing..."

[I just thought of something.]
<Oh I don't know...>
[Relax.]
(What?)
[You and Twilight haven't finished your high school education.]

"...Uh oh." I said to myself when Twilight was staring directly at my shoulder. "Can you see him?"

"Them, and yes. Dustin, we haven't finished high school!"

"Relax, just go ask Celestia for your education."

"It's not that simple!"

"...I think it is. Just tell her what happened, show her the cat ears and tail to prove yourself, and she might even give you the college education for free."

"B-but..."

"But you're the smartest person in, like, ever." Spike said cheering her on.

"Go for it!" Rarity said as they started to dance beside us. Why? I dunno.

"But..."

"Stop saying but!" I demanded.

"*sigh* Fine. We'll go see the princess."

In the future...

"Keep on reading!" Twilight said happily, moving on to her 26th book.

"Twilight, I'm on book number 2!" I shouted, going through the pages slowly. I looked over to see Applejack and Rarity handing Twilight books, Lightning defending us, and Niko sleeping. I was only pretending to read too. I was actually singing songs in my head the entire time.

(It was a normal day... just like any other. Then out of the blue, it turned into horror!)
[<How could they? Why would they?>]
(The innocent suffer from hell's inferno! A senseless act... that goes unforgotten!)
[<How could they?>]
(They will pay! When...the eagle criiiieeeesssss...)

"Found it!" Twilight said while jumping out of a pile of books.

"Huh?" I looked around to see I passed out. I also saw I drooled on the book so I just slept it under the table and stood up. I walked for the door and saw the crystal bearers leaving their homes. Each one of them was depressed and walked at a good 2 mph. I mean, who walks that slowly? Honestly. "Twilight, I'm going to set up the heart." I said grabbing the large bag with the crystal inside it.

"Be careful."

"I will!" I walked outside and downstairs, backwards just for the hell of it, and made my way into the bottom of the tower. There I met up with Cadence and Shining Armor again. "How's the love goin'?"

"We're fine." Shining said.

"Good to hear brother. And Cadence?"

"Oh I'm doing much better Dustin."

"Nothing out of the ordinary?"

"Nothing besides the constant shadow banging against the shield I'm raising."

"Oh nonsense. Well, Shining, you do know you could help with the barrier."

"When I fought against Sombra, he did something to limit my magic."

"Is it... the dark crystals stuck in your back?"

"Must be."

"...Huh... well I'm gonna go put this heart in. I'm just... you know... waiting for everyone to start sending all of their love into it. So bye!" I jumped out the window and slowly walked down the side of the building. "Hmm... I can't even remember why we arrested Trixie."
[Because of her drinking and how she started to beat up random people.]
<She also shoved a bottle up the asshole of one Mr. Iron Will.>
"I didn't hear about that. Isn't he the Total Gym guy?"
[No that's Chuck Norris.]
"No I meant... Ohhh... what did he do?"
<Iron Will sold Shake-Weights.>
"That's it! Man what a fag..."

I jumped off the side of the building when i was at the bottom and I pulled the heart from the messenger bag. I placed it inside of the two spikes that deployed and I saw people who were at the Fair coming by to donate their love. The Fair had just started though, so it was going to be a while till this thing sets off a chain reaction and kills Sombrero.

<Technically a fag isn't an insult.>
(Isn't a fag a bundle of sticks?)
[Yeah. You would kindle with a fag. I don't see how people think that was gay.]
(Their is nothing gay about lighting a bundle of sticks on fire. You want to survive don't ya?)
<*sigh* People these days.>

"Dustin! Great news!" Niko said running up to me.

"Hmm?"

"It's about Dawn! The doctor called!"

"Oh, so what's the good news?"

"The baby is due right now!"

"...Oh shit." I reached into my pocket and pulled out a walkie-talkie. "Hello Big Bird, this is Little Boy Blue. Over"

"Dustin, for the love of god, we don't need to speak in code!" Lightning yelled on the other side. "...Over."

"Big Bird, it appears the 'sun has set.' I repeat. The 'sun has set', do you understand? Over?"

"...Oh shit... get Red Rover to me Little Boy Blue and I'll get him home to the missus. Over?"

"Over Big Bird... over." I put the talkie away. "Niko, get over to Lightning right now, he'll get you home."

"But don't you need me here?"

"Niko! Your wife is giving birth! She needs you right now man!"

"But I'm scared!"

"You put her in this position, you're going to help her get out!"

"Alright... I can do this. I can... do this."

"What are you?"

"I...am...a winner..."

"What?"

"I'm a winner."

"A winner and what?"

"Proud."

"One more time."

"I'm a winner and proud!"

"Louder."

"I'M A WINNER AND PROUD! I'M A WINNER AND PROUD! I'M A WINNEEEERRRRR!!!" he ran off screaming what I tricked him into saying and I heard him talking from over here. "Hey Tombs!"

"What?"

"I'm a winner and proud!"

"I could here you from over there!" he pointed to me, and I waved my hands violently in the air so he'd acknowledge me. "Let's get you home Lover Boy." I watched as Johnathon opened up a portal and walked inside it.

"I'm a winner and proud!"

"Sure you are..." I said to myself.
(Isn't childbirth fascinating?)
[It's a miracle!]
<I remember when we met the female version of ourselves. Why don't you ask her?>
(Destiny? Oh she'd say the same thing that every other woman would say. Don't do it unless you are absolutely ready for it.)

I decided that I'd have to do something to get the hearts flying. I was afraid that I would have to play a song, and these people would be terrified by it. I mean, you take these crystal bearers who have been asleep for a thousand years, give them a fair out of nowhere, and have a king play a mean song on his guitar. I don't think they can handle the awesomeness from this situation, so I'm just going to work a regular booth like everyone else.

"Pies! Come get your pies! Pies are for sale for the low price of nothing but my hard work!" I shouted making more people come.

"What else do you got?" A little boy asked.

"Well... I got donuts, bagels, funnel cakes, Twinkies, pies, and I also got a regular assortment of candy." I held a box up. "Would you like some?"

"Oh boy would I!" he grabbed a Butterfinger and shoved it in his mouth.

"Wait! You might...wanna... take of the wrapper."

"No it's cool." He continued to eat and walked away.

"Oi! Kitty boy! Get me a pie!"

"Sure thing Old Coot." I handed the old man a cherry pie. I wasn't as good as a cook like Pinkie Pie, but I've taken cooking classes and have learned how to make a decent meal. I can cook great pies and soups. The only two things I need to survive... I miss Pinkie Pie.

"I'm not old! I'm only 68!"

"Hahaha... no you still look like your in your prime man!"

"Darn tootin'!" he walked away.

"See ya!"

"Yeah yeah..."

(I like that guy.)
<Yeah, you and old people. Two words. Lemon party.>
[Oh yuck...]
(Dude! Come on! I'm trying to sell pies!)
<And he wanted your pie. Your thigh pie to be exact.>
(Okay I'm taking a break...)

I threw the apron down and walked out of the booth over to the music section. I had to run a bunch of booths, or it wouldn't be the same. "So what the hell is a Fleugelhorn?" Just an hour ago, Spike and Fluttershy came to the empire. I asked Fluttershy who was selling them and all other merchandise.

"I'm not entirely sure."

"Hey Shy! You need to go joustin'!" Applejack said.

"Jousting? Oh my... I don't think I can do that Applejack."

"Sure you can! We just need to find someone who will take it easy on ya!"

"I'll do it if you'll sell the goods." I put my thumb on my shoulder, gesturing to my bake shop.

"Dustin, I can't beat you in a sport!"

"But you will. Don't worry, I'll take it easy on you."

"Will you really? I mean... what if I accidentally hurt you."

"Then try your best not to."

"*giggle* Okay, I'll try." Fluttershy looked towards Twilight and I as her closest family. I mean her parents... Ugh... trust me when I say you're better off not knowing. I picked up two mugs of cider, alcoholic of course, hoping this would help her out. "You're giving me alcohol?"

"I figured it might help. Just remember what the exercising Mr. T dude taught you on how to be assertive."

"Iron Will? Oh but I wasn't satisfied with his teachings."

"Wait... that was Iron Will? Huh... Yeah he was the shake-weight guy..."

"What do you mean?"

"Just a conversation I had with me, myself, and I earlier."

"Oh...so how do I joust?" she asked taking a sip from the cider. Then she started drinking even more.

"Hey, easy on the cider!"

"Let's do this!" she smashed the wooden mug against her head, huffed her chest, and marched to the arena.

"...What...have I done?"

In the past...

"Of course you'll get your diploma!" Celestia said. "Oh Twilight, you've had the worst of it! A college education is the last thing you should worry about. Actually I'm going to give you a college diploma to help you out."

"But, isn't that cheating?"

"Twilight... I can't have you in school anymore. Haven't you learned your destiny yet?"

"I mean... I may have...but..."

"Let's not worry about that now." I cut into the sentence.

"Did you not explain it to her?"

"Actually she knows more than I do."

"I'm suppose to become the..."

"Future Queen of Earth." Celestia said finishing her sentence. "You have royal blood in you, these cute little cat ears prove that don't you think?" she said holding onto Twilight's ears and lightly squeezing them.

"But Princess, how do you know?"

"Because Twilight..." Celestia took her tiara off and showed she had pony ears. "We all have our secrets."

"...I'm not ready for this."

"Oh of course your not. It will be several years before you over-throne me."
(I swear... It's like Celestia doesn't want to rule.)
[She had no trouble doing it in Equestria.]
<Something else must've happened here.>
(Twilight and I aren't ready to rule. I mean, we're only 17!)
[Technically 19.]
<But biologically 17.>

I walked with Twilight until we got to the library. There I saw Luna and 'Grimm' reading, still looking for something.

"Sister, I found something! It appears that father..." Luna stopped talking when she saw me. "Dustin Shafer. I owe you and your family an apology."

"Good to see you man." Grimm said putting a hand on my shoulder. I didn't return their feelings, but I smiled and said thanks. I in all honesty was more interested in the journal. The black journal decorated with moons and stars... oh wait that is Luna's diary. Then where the hell is the one I'm after? Ah I don't even care anymore. If they think Twilight should become a future ruler, and they keep apologizing to me, then I can learn what the hell happened without stealing a journal. The journal from the asshole who haunted my family.

"Can I ask you something...Grimm."

"Sure."

"Sombra... when I fought him in Equestria-"

"You went to Equestria?!" he dropped his book and jumped out of his seat. "What? How?"

"Discord. He tricked me and Twilight. We were there for... 2 months."

"I remember the time difference. So as you were saying... Sombra?"

"Yes. He said I was an alternate version of you. Or at least a man named Grimm."

"Yeah you're me alright." he said putting his hand on his chin. "Maybe a little better than the original... and how old are you?"

"17."

"Ah. My life began to change when I was 17." he said to himself. Celestia cleared her throat, making an obvious sign for him. "Fine. I'm gonna go. Come on Luna! Adventure!"

"Where to today?"

"I'm thinking our next place to live. If we give up the throne-" they were cut off when Celestia slammed the door.

"So you were planning on us to come back?" I asked her.

"At least Twilight. I knew you had the blood in you, so you had to marry her to get her the powers-"

"Wait wait wait... did you set this up?"

"Of course I didn't!" she said with pain in her voice. I had offended her. "How could you jump to such a conclusion?!"

"I-I'm sorry. I'll leave now."

"Dustin-" Twilight began to calm me down but I stopped her.

"No it's okay. Look this is between you two. I'm merely the tool." I walked outside and moved far away from Celestia. Why did she infuriate me so much? She makes it sound like this is her fault... like she expected this... and she's standing their telling me that she only cared about Twilight after putting us both through this ordeal?! The nerve... but she was right. It was the fault of Discord.

In the future...

I sat on a pile of hay holding my left hand towards the sun. I was waiting for the judges to say 'The Jousting Games shall now commence!' but still nothing came to my ears. I sat up, feeling the heavy metal vest slump down on my chest, and wiped the sand from my eyes.

"Hey mister! Are you the king?" a child asked.

"I sure am. Good to meet you, I'm Dustin." I held my hand out and he backed away in surprise.

"Whoa! Where's your pinky at?"

"Oh...um...I lost it."

"Where?"

"To a bad man."

"Like Sombra? Is he a bad man?"

"Oh he's a very bad man. And by the end of this day, I promise he can't hurt you anymore. No this nub means something to me actually..." I held it up at the sun again.

"What does it mean?"

"It means that I love my family more than anything."

"I don't understand."

"You see-" I was cut off by the sound of a horn. Possibly the Fleugalhorn I've heard so much about. Or however you spell it. i don't care. Point is, when I turned, I saw the child was running towards the games. I grabbed the golden helmet and planted it on my head.

"The Annual Jousting Games shall now commence!" Spike said into the speaker. I grabbed the lance and dragged it to the gate.

(Guys... I'm starting to second think this.)
<Relax. You're fighting Fluttershy.>
[Who is drunk...]
(And I can't hurt her! She's that adorable!)

I walked to my gate and saw Fluttershy in hers. She was steamed with a look that resembled Rainbow Dash. You could literally see the fire in her eyes. Now most men would run away, but seeing that I signed up for this, I should receive the punishment I am just asking for.

"In this corner is the King of Canterlot and quite possibly, the greatest ruler of Earth! Dustin Shafer!" I heard the crowd cheer furiously. They just loved me. I waved at them and smiled like they would expect a star to do. "And in the other corner is the greatest veterinarian to ever live! Combined with over 12 years of self-defense and bear-wrestling! Give it up for Fluttershy!"

(...I'm dead.)
[Hey look! Twilight's watching!]
(Where!)
<By the pond.>

I turned to the right and saw her helping people out. She turned and waved at me. At that second... time stood still for us. The lovers made for each other by Mother Nature and Father Time. Their is no one who would say we shouldn't be together. Only that we need to be with one another. It's the only thing I have left to look forward to, really. Just spending time with friends, my daughters, Twilight... and I work for that feeling every week.

*WRRRR!* Spike blew a whistle and the gates opened. I held up the lance and took a light jog to match Shy's speed. I was aware that I had the lance aimed directly for her neck, like I was about to kill, so I pulled it away and she stabbed me in the chest, destroying a chunk of the breastplate.

"Gaaahhh...focus!" I smacked myself lightly on the head.

"Dustin! Stop eyeballing my sister and get in the game!" Spike called.

"I can't hit her! She's too adorable!"

"Not my problem. *WRRRR!*"

This time I aimed at a non-lethal spot so I could risk hitting her. Also i was using my right hand so I had a stronger grip. Still my judgement got the better of me and I couldn't bear myself to hit this girl. So instead I moved the lance into a defensive position and deflected her attack.

"I need another drink!" she demanded.

"Oh no no no no!" I shouted as someone ran to her with a large mug. I mean this was even bigger than Niko's hand!

"Would you like a drink ma-lord?" another worker asked me.

"Do you have painkillers to go with that?"

"Yes I do. May I ask why?"

"This is gonna hurt me..." The man fetched me the medicine and I braced myself for the pain that was heading towards me. I couldn't get drunk so I'd always have a guilty conscious from this. "Sorry Shy!" I shouted. When we ran towards each other again, I gently knocked the piece of metal from her left arm with extreme accuracy.

"I'm still...*hic* Good to go!"

"One more go?"

"One more..."

"Okay. One more go." I went back to jogging towards her and moved the helmet sideways to protect my face as I saw her lance go up. I felt the metal hit the helmet, shattering the lance to pieces and knocking the armor from my head. "Phew! That was close!"

"Dustin, I'm sorry." she said.

"Is the alcohol starting to wear off?"

"Yes. I'm going to be sick!" she cried as she ran off and vomited in the trash can. I walked over and picked her up. "*giggle* You're a naughty boy aren't you Dustin?"

"*pfft!* Me? As if." she leaned up and kissed me on the cheek.

"Let's go to my place..."

"Let's not."

"Oh, why not?"

"I'm a married man Shy. Also don't you have that special somebody back home?"

"Well...yeah. But-"

"But nothing." I laid her on the bed in our guest room. "Go to bed Fluttershy. You're drunk." I closed the door behind me and wiped the lipstick mark from my cheek.

(Since when did Fluttershy wear make-up? I thought she was all natural.)
<Well... I have nothing to say to you really.>
(What? Why?)
<You embarrassed us. Particularly me.>
[Would you beat up someone as cute and innocent as Shy?]

I continued to argue with myself until I felt the ground shake and a large ripple fill the air. I recognized it from 18 years ago, when I first visited the Crystal Empire. Yeah! When the heart was full of love, it exploded like this, and then I would hear Som-

"NOOOOOOOooooooo..." I heard Sombra's voice cut me off from my train of thought and saw him explode in the distance. A job well done Dustin. You got this asshole destroyed from your world. It's about goddamn time. I felt up to see my long hair was up in a braid with crystals dangling from it.

"Huh...well I look...different." I said to myself in the reflection I saw in the pond at the park on my way to Twilight. It was different from my usual center-parted appearance, but it was still nice. I reached up to undo the braid but couldn't get my hand through the knot so I just let it stay for now. I found Twilight, who was glowing a little bit, and had her hair in a bun. "Hey Twilight. How was your day?"

"Oh pretty good. I never though I'd see you with a braid again."

"I'm glad you enjoyed seeing me back then with a ponytail."

"You we're the only assassin following tradition. I have a question for you. Why do you look like you just got beaten up?"

"Did you see the jousting games?"

"No."

"I couldn't bring myself to fight Fluttershy, then she got alcohol in her system, and then-"

"So you lost?"

"I lost."

"...Did you give her alcohol?"

"Yes."

"Then I found your problem." We continued to talk as we walked for the castle. Inside we found Cadence and Shining Armor. He would hold me down and give me a noogie, treating me like he would Spike.

"How's it going buddy?" he asked holding me down.

"Hahahaha! I wouldn't know! I have someone's knuckle digging in my brain at the moment so it's hard to think!"

"Oh hahahaha... then I bet you wouldn't want to pass on a drink."

"Never!"

"Okay, but first I need to talk business with Twilight."

"Go ahead." I moved to the side so he could hug his sister. I talked to Cadence while he was busy. "So, are you relieved to put down the protection barrier?"

"It's a shame too! I just got use to it!"

"Aw..."

"I saw you joust as well."

"We'll never talk about this. Ever."

"Has the wise king with the heart of gold lost his ability to maim and kill?"

"Well..."

"Speak up. The others can't hear, they're too busy talking amongst themselves." I turned to see the brother and sister still teasing and laughing at each other.

"I almost killed her. Fluttershy. It's an odd ability of mine... to just know where to strike for a kill. So each time we rushed each other, I'd have to force myself to miss."

"Is it really that bad?"

"It's pretty bad. But she's alive and unharmed. Can't say the same for me." I found the spot where the braid in my hair began and I un-twirled my hair. "Aha! I got this damn braid out!" My hair lifted up by itself and we-wrapped itself. "No no no no!" I grabbed a fork from the table and stuck it in the knot. "Not gonna happen...Huh?" I felt the fork snap and I held the handle in my hand. Not the end. I reached up and pulled it out.

"Just don't fight it." Shining said with a chuckle.

"How come your hair doesn't do this?" I asked him.

"Because I have manly hair." He struck a pose and I heard the singer from Judas Priest yell 'MANLY HAIIIIIRRRR! YEAH!' and the girls clapped.

"Hmph!" I crossed my arms and looked out the window, half-embarrassed, the other half-because I wanted to. "I like my hair though. It's not as straight and greasy as yours." I said pointing fun at his long blue hair.

"Greasy?"

"Shining, I've seen you with the same hair-cut since I was 12!"

"...I like my hair." he puffed his cheeks and chest and looked at Cadence.

"What? Don't give me that face. Your hair is better than Dustin's any day in my eyes."

"She's right." I told him. "Once you go blue, you never go back. Twilight what do you think?"

"I don't want to get involved honestly!" she said with a laugh. It wasn't often that we got to have these fun encounters. The last time I met Shining was on the battlefield actually. So I always enjoy these visits with my friends and family more than anything else in this world. It's all I have to look forward too. Yet I'm always full of sadness and grief when I think about a time when all of my friends will be gone. What will I have to look forward to then? "Dustin? Is something wrong?"

"Well no. Nothing PARTICULARLY is wrong."

"Is it THAT again?"

"Yeah."

"Alright. Go meditate."

"See you in an hour."

"Actually we leave in a few minutes."

"Then I'll meet you back home. Bye Shining, bye Cadence."

"Goodbye Dustin." they both hugged me and sent me out the door. I walked away from the empire and found a quiet spot near a pond in the woods. So I meditated and lifted myself over the pond.

(What should we meditate on today?)
[One, get this gay braid out of our hair!] Beta was still on the ground (my shoulder) wrestling with it.
<We meditate on the hair.> Alpha was in the same position I was but was digging in his hair at the same time. <I can handle a ponytail, but not this bun thing.>
(I shall meditate on the hair.)

The pond started to glow, and the my clothes and hair started to move with the wind. Arms rose from the pond and a whirlpool emerged. I felt it surround me in it's magical warmth and the arm move towards my head. It booped me on the nose (this is how we acknowledge each other.) and it pulled one pin out of my hair making the braid fall.

"THAT'S IT?!"

"That's it." Aquarius said letting herself come out. "You're looking as good as always Traveler in the Dark."

"And you're as beautiful as ever Bringer of the Water." I sat down on the bench she formed for me, even with the whirlpool still around me. I kicked my legs back and forth playfully.

"Please, I am merely one deity. You've accomplished more than I could ever do."

"Don't count yourself out yet. You bring for the waters of life. What you don't know is that no one could ever survive without it."

"Very wise."

"Also don't let it go to your head. Keep on doubting yourself. Set goals to break. Challenge your abilities. I'm still doing it now."

"But you can do almost anything with your shadows!"

"I know! But I don't admit it, so I can force myself to try."

"*giggle* Have fun Dustin."

"You too Aquarius. I'll see you next Saturday."

"Okay! Bye!" the water disappeared around me as I exited my meditating state. I opened my eyes to see I wasn't alone in the woods. I saw that boy from before.

"Hello child! What may I do for you today?" I asked lowering myself and walking along the water.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" he screamed and ran away. It's the cat ears. Always the cat ears. And in his imagination I bet I looked like one of those big scary silhouetted people you see in your dreams that say 'I'm going to gobble you up!' I guess I'm the new Nightmare Moon now too. Hehehe... I could have fun with that.

"Fun!" I heard below me. I looked in the water to see Pinkie Pie.

"Pinkie...Pie?" she held a knife in her hands and waved at me cheerfully. I dodged to the right as her arm came flying out of the pool. "Damn mirror pool!" I kicked my foot through it and made contact with her face, sending her back. I stuck my arm through and use my magic to cut the large boulder in the ceiling. It should be big enough to block the pool and stop her. I swear, I have to do this a lot more often than usual.

I pulled my arm out and stood on the pool, using the force of myself to block the mirror on my side. The boulder came flying down and as soon as it did, I saw the clear blue colors return to the poor. It wasn't Aquarius's fault. It's just when she visits, she accidentally leaves a portal open from the spirit dimension. Then someone could find another point in another world or universe and pass through said portal. It's such a wonderful form of magic.

Science would disagree with me on this. I swear a group of those lab coat wearing assholes would just try their best to come up with big words and say that this is merely my imagination at work, that I am unstable with my magic, and then condemn me. It's not the first time I've gotten lectured from scientist. I'll just sit still, listen to them, and then I'd turn it around and twist everything they said into my own words and use it to wound them. Words are the strongest of all weapons.

(Well... besides the whole Pinkie tried to kill me for the 7th time thing...and the kid running away from us... I'd say today went pretty well.)
[...No, it was horrible.]
<I hated every bit of that braid.>
(Fucking hurt.)
[Yeah it did! Why did it hurt?]
<Because hair isn't something you can just... play with.>

Then quickly, a lightning portal opened beside me. I instantly recognized it as Tombs's magic. Instantly the royal guard walked through the portal and bowed to me.

"My lord! I found you!"

"It shouldn't be hard. I mean... did I not swallow the tracking device you asked for?"

"No! You didn't!"

"Hehe! You're right. I'm sure you came to take me home now."

"This way."

"I appreciate it my good man." I walked through his spell and found myself in the throne room. "Home sweet home."

"As I promised, now I've worked overtime-"

"What was it? 3 days extra?"

"Dustin I worked only a half a day over but-"

"You're right. I shall give you a week off and a full week's worth of pay!"

"...Are you serious?"

"Yeah! Go have some fun! Enjoy time with the family, that's what I'm gonna do."

"Thank you my lord!"

"Dustin! Just say Dustin! You did before-"

"I already told you, that I must keep up good appearances!"

"...Damn it you did say that. Alright. Blah blah blah well done royal subject yada yada yada you are dismissed until further notice in a week's time." He bowed and ran away very happily. I mean he even jumped up and kicked his feet together. "Hahahaha..."
(Wish we still had that enthusiasm.)
<But...we do.>
(...)
[Oh yeah.]

I jumped up and kicked my feet together as I skipped through the hall. I sneaked upstairs and into the kids room so I could surprise my children. I saw Sunlight Comet with her hands against her eyes and her body turned towards the wall.

"8...9...10! Ready or not! Here I come!"

"Boo!"

"Gah!" She jumped and turned around. "You scared me Dad. You want to play too?"

"Of course I will. I just got to find-" I felt two hands cover my eyes.

"Got you Daddy!"

"Hahaha! You're quieter than I was at your age!" I picked both of them up and hugged them closely as I swung in circles. "Hahahahaha!"

"*giggle* Okay! Put me down now!" Comet demanded.

"Or what?"

"I'll get you back!" she put her hands to my sides and started to tickle me.

"No! My only true weakness! Hehehehehehehehe! Q-quit it! Stop! No!" Star helped her out and I fell onto the couch as they continued to harass me. I looked up to see Twilight run in. "Help me O' brave knight!"

"I shall rescue my King!" she picked up the children and hugged them like I did a minute ago. "How's that?"

"Well you do need a just reward..." I grabbed her hands and started to tango. "How about another dancing lesson?"

"You know I can't dance!"

"Not with that kind of negativity!"

"Mom! We were about to play hide and seek!" Star said in a way that was so adorable...Oh I felt my heart explode a little bit. "Will you play with us?" Oh there it went again. Yep. My heart.

"Tag you're it!" Comet jumped up and gently poked Twilight on the nose.

"Okay! Do I count to 10 or 3?" Twilight asked. The kids looked at each other and bolted out the door.

"Well..."

"3..."

"Are you being serious?"

"2... You don't want to know what I'm going to do when I catch you."

"Oh my..." I jogged out the door and climbed on top of one of Twilight's bookshelves.

"1!" she ran out of the room and looked around. "Oh... darn heels." she bent down to take her boots off. When she did, she looked directly up at me. "Aha! Caught you!"

"Aw... but you didn't even mean to catch me!"

"That may be true, but I did mean I was going to do something to you when I caught you." she leaned up and kissed me lustfully on the mouth. "Meet me in the bedroom in an hour."

"Of course my queen."
[Twilight is going to get sexed up!]
<Hmm...I don't think she'd want to be with you Beta. She's into more mature men who know exactly what a woman needs!> Alpha stood and held his hand up to the sky as tears soaked his face. He was dead serious about his words.
[Is it... the Lifetime channel and a box of chocolates?]
(That usually works.)
<SHUT UP!>

I walked into the kitchen to make a snack when Fluttershy walked in.

"You forgot to wake me up." she mumbled. "Rarity and Twilight got me. I also heard that I kicked your butt in jousting."

"Yeah you did..." I reached up to the cupboard and grabbed a box full of cinnamon bread sticks, poured those into a bowl, and put them in the microwave. "Want a snack?"

"...Um..." she watched me take out the bread sticks and dip them into a bat of custard. "No thank you." She smiled when I took a sip from the bowl giving myself a large custard mustache. I've always had these strange cravings since the royal blood awakened inside me.

Back to the past time...

Well I thought to myself about how big of a jerk I looked earlier. I was just still upset about the entire ordeal that I've been thrown into and I took a majority of that anger out on Celestia. She wasn't ever mean to me so I owe her an apology. Still I realized I was extremely hungry, and had no energy left in me what so ever. I laid against a table, my head resting on my arm, and I was unable to move. I couldn't even move my mouth. I was so busy looking after Twilight that I had forgotten to take care of myself.

"Would you like something to eat?" Luna asked sitting at the dining table across from me. "Dustin? You okay?"

"Nnngghh...yeah." I struggled to move. "I could go for a bite..."

"*giggle* How is it that you have forgotten to eat?"

"I was eating adrenaline and I've spent this entire time keeping Twilight safe. Now it appears both hunger and pain has caught up to me by surprise."

"Let's get some food in your system."

"Yep." And so everyone came to the table, but oddly with a book in their hands. The only thing interesting I had to look at was my mask and my weapons... and I don't want to pull those out during dinner. It never took much to fill me up. I couldn't eat as much as the normal child. I taught myself how to eat properly and how to eat only what I need, and save the left for another time.

I sat at the table, staring at my plate. I was never a big fan of gravy. Okay I down right hated it. Something inside it just... made me sick. But I didn't want to be rude, so I forced myself to eat it and hold it down.

"I *cough* never got to apologize *cough cough* Celestia... for being a jerk." Twilight knew I hated gravy, and I think Celestia found out. I was the only person who got that to eat. She's a troll!

"In that case I properly accept your apology." she snapped her fingers and a waiter took the gravy away from me. There wasn't even any meat in it! "What would you like to eat?"

"I..." I stood up and ran to the bathroom to puke. I could hear them laughing in there, except Twilight. I saw her face from the mirror's reflection. But she couldn't speak up to her teacher. No one could. She was the ruler... and she could dish out whatever punishment she wanted. I looked at my vomit to see that it was extremely runny and my stomach was shaking violently. I hadn't eaten in a long time... and now I was in a worst condition. I cleaned my face and hands before returning to the table and munching on the salad they brought me. "Thank you."

"You're more than welcome." she said with bemusement in her eyes. She was just waiting for another chance to strike back at me.

[You alright man?]
(Just let me eat.)
<Dustin, I think she's trying to get us mad.>
(What?)
<Didn't she say she didn't want to rule? Maybe she wants us to 'assassinate' her, if you know what I mean.>
(Make her disappear?)
[It's a good plan.]

I felt my cravings kick in and my mouth drool when I saw a bowl of banana pudding. But before I could ask for a bowl, Celestia snatched it and started to enjoy teasing me by eating more.

"Sister, if you eat too much then you'll get sick too!" Luna cried.

"Nah, I'll be fine."

<As if all that food hasn't gone to her ass already.>
[Even the pony version of her had a big rump!]
(...I'm don't even want to talk. I'm still so hungry...Fruit! I want fruit!)

"Excuse me waiter..." I said to the man delivering the food.

"Ah... the CAT has finally made his choice on what he wants for dinner." I don't like his attitude. I mean... that was rude right?

"...Eh...I...can you get me some apples please?"

"Whatever you desire." he walked out and came back with a small bowl of red apples. Now these I actually enjoyed eating. I picked up two of them and started to chomp away. You'd know how happy I was by how fast my tail was wagging! "Enjoy your apples. People actually had to work for those." I stopped eating once his attitude got to me.

"Come now, relax Jeeves." Celestia spoke. She had already hurt me enough today.

"I refuse to take orders from a freak like him!" he shouted while pointing at me. "They all deserve to die!" I swallowed the last bit of food that was already in my mouth and put the apples back in the bowl. I backed the chair up and walked out of the room.

"Thanks for dinner." I said before gently closing the door. I didn't want to look like I lost my cool, I just didn't want to be in that room anymore. I actually stuffed a few apples into my pockets (like I said, I conserve food!) and I made my way outside. I sat on the wooden swing set under an old tree which showed the world around me. It is truly a sight to see you're on a floating island.

No ocean... no land... just the sky with the moon and clouds looking at you. Now this was a better place for me to eat in. I swung gently back and forth thinking about how easy I could just kill myself now. I was the catalyst to get Twilight into this position. Now I wasn't needed. I was actually a threat. Maybe Celestia knew that... and she needs that. So she wants to build tension between us so we don't bond.

"I'm sorry." Twilight said behind me.

"Why are you crying?"

"Because..."

"Because your an Anamorph too. Right. Come here!" I patted the seat beside me. "It's a sturdy swing, it can hold both of us."

"Dustin, you've been through so much pain and suffering. Your pet is gone... your family was hunted and chased out of Evergreen Fields... you haven't eaten in 2 weeks even!"

"I have to keep you fed."

"But I'm not the problem here! You look sick and tired!"

"I am... I am completely exhausted. But I got you here Future Queen to be. To this castle... to your new life. You deserve this. Not me. And I'm not needed anymore."

"You're my husband and I refuse to let you talk bad about yourself anymore!" she smacked me hard on the cheek causing me to spit out the apple piece I was chewing on. "Oh no! I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright. Just next time, keep your claws down." I reached up and felt the blood starting to pour. I used a shadow to wrap up my face and let it heal. "What's wrong? Talk to me."

"I'm the horrible person in this equation. I'm taking advantage of you! Even now! Out of everything you've done for me and out of everything you've given up... I've done nothing in return."

"Twilight you made me truly happy." I smiled at her. I hadn't smiled in actual happiness for a very long time. "You have actually noticed me! When I was a kid... I was so happy that you liked me!"

"Please... don't bring that up."

"Do you remember that weekend?"

"I do."

"I was that small kid... walking home with all my books and stuff from the locker."

"And all the neighborhood kids jumped on you and beat you to a pulp."

"Yeah... and you chased them away from me. You helped me back up. You were my first true friend." I watched her wipe another tear from her face. "You taught me how to get back up when I fall. You taught me to never give up. To always do my best, no matter how hard the situation..." I felt my eyes get runny. "Where is that person now? Why has she left?"

"I'm right here..."

"No you're not! You complaining since you've fallen for the first time! Where is the girl who taught me to get back up? Where is she?"

"I'm right here!" she yelled gaining a sudden burst of energy. "You're right! You've always been right! Dustin..."

"What?"

"You were right!"

"Go see 'Dustin was always right!' the new blockbuster. The movie starts at 11."

"*giggle* And you always know how to make me laugh. I'm going to teach that chef to never insult you again!" she stood up and walked confidently to the castle. I sighed to myself and closed my eyes as I took another bite from the apple. My cheek had healed and I went back to swinging. I summoned my guitar and swallowed my apple.

"When I see your smile
Tears run down my face
I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold
And breaks through my soul
And I know, I'll find deep inside me
I can be the one
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven..."

I heard a footstep behind me break a stick. It wasn't Twilight and I don't think it was a princess. I couldn't tell who it was from my angle so I flipped around and turned the guitar into a sword.

"Wait! Don't don't don't!" The chef cried falling down.

"Oh hey! You scared me man!" I put the sword down. "Take my hand." I helped him get up and I wiped the leaves from his coat. "Sorry."

"No, I'm sorry. You're...wife... told me about everything we put you through and I was being prejudice." he handed me a basket full of apples. "And no men didn't work for these. They were just bought from the store."

"You know I use to sell apples right?" I asked him taking the basket away.

"Really?"

"Yep. How ironic. It was before your WORKERS kicked me out of my land and killed everyone I loved."

"Oh my god... I am so so so sorry!"

"You didn't seem that way before."

"I...oh is their anyway I can make it up to you Mr...?"

"Shafer."

"SHAFER?!"

"Yeah. Remember that name? The King executed my beloved brother, the most loyal of all soldiers, for being Anamorphic in front of every man, woman, and child."

"So you must be..."

"Dustin Shafer. The last survivor of Evergreen Fields."

"Please don't kill me!" he got on his knees and begged for his life. I tilted his head up with the sword.

"Don't you know?"

"Know what?"

"That Anamorphs are the most kind and generous people to ever live? They would never fight back, never insult without a cause, or curse their victims. I won't kill you. I haven't even thought about it until you brought it up."

"Thank you! You're a good man! A good man!"

"So I'm a man now?"

"Y-yes? OH! I mean... You've always been a man. A hard working man trying to make a good future!"

"That's exactly right. You're forgiven..." I picked up another apple.

"Thank you!" he said wiping his tears and snot away.

"For now."

"What?"

"Get running before I change my mind."

"Eek! Yes sir!" he got up and bolted for the castle.

(I don't think I've ever heard a man eek before.)
[You had fun messing with him didn't you?]
<I thought it was brilliant! Hahahaha!>
"Hahahahaha! I did get carried away didn't I?"

"So do you feel better?" Celestia asked walking out.

"A little."

"I can read your thoughts Dustin." I was scared for a moment and I turned to face her when she handed me King Faust's journal. "You deserve to go through this book more than me."

"I..."

"And I'm sorry about the gravy and pudding. I was merely teasing!"

"Thank you Princess."

"But I am sorry about Chef Jeeves. He had always hated people that were better than him. He even made Twilight cry."

"It was all in good fun in my eyes!" I leaned back in against the tree as I rested on the floor. "And I got enough apples here to last me 5 months!" I went to eat another one but I reminded myself that I had already eaten about 9 of them. I'd get sick if I kept it up. But I went ahead and ate one more apple.

"Enjoy. I look forward to spending quality time with you tomorrow!" she said walking away with some sway in her step. I was caught off guard and coughed up the apple chunk. "Oh and Dustin?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you for keeping both you and Twilight safe. Her life means more than anything to me right now. This isn't just about me, but it's about the good of the people." I didn't know what to say. I can't find a good word to say! I mean... she just gave me the best complement I needed to hear and I'm sitting her speechless while coughing up an apple! She can read my mind right? Tell me the word I should say back Celestia! "The word you're looking for is, 'Welcome.'"

"W-welcome!"

"Goodnight Dustin. Prince of the Shadows."

...Once again... I am speechless. But I'm happy knowing that my relationship with Celestia hadn't changed over the past 2 years. I still looked up to her, like a child eager to learn. Of course not as eager as Twilight, but I kept an open mind. I did learn to barter... from my mom actually. She was the best. I don't see why she became a doctor and not a merchant.

I wasn't like most other barterers. I wouldn't spend the money I have at once. I wouldn't take a risk without lots of facts and details. I was the guy who could take 2 copper pieces, and make 10 shillings from that and turn those silver pieces into 4 sovereigns (Those are the gold pieces. Remember this entire money system uses only 3 coins.)

So I lifted my sleeve to see that my worn watch said it was nearing midnight. I stretched my back, deciding I would read this journal when I had the energy to match my patience... since when did I start thinking wise things? Oh well... I headed inside and asked a guard to escort me to my room. One of them took me to Twilight's chambers and left us be.

"Mm...Dustin?" she asked turning over in bed.

"Hey... you missed it." I said placing the basket of apples against the dresser where I stored most of my clothes. "I made the chef cry."

"Well if he's learned his lesson, then I guess I'm suppose to be happy, right?"

"You could, but it doesn't change the fact that he insulted us. You see... words are the strongest of all weapons. They can pierce further than any arrow and cut deeper than any blade, and they are also the easiest to hide from your victims."

"When did you become wise all of a sudden? I didn't expect you to get smart all of a sudden."

"Not every smart man is a wise man."

"And that's another wise saying! I guess we're both changing."

"Yep." I jumped in the bed beside her and hopped up and down in it.

"What? Why do you look so happy?"

"I've never been in a bed this comfortable before! Hehehehe!" I kept on moving up and down on the spring until Twilight pulled me down to her level.

"You're wise, but your childish."

"It'd be best if I kept up a good spirit with myself then sit in a corner all day and gloom at the world!"

"I'm not being gloomy! I just enjoy reading!"

"Well I got us a new book to read tomorrow."

"Book! Where? What is it?!"

"It's King Faust's journal..." I saw the sparkles in her eyes. "In the morning Twilight. We both need some sleep. And with a bed this soft... *yawn* I don't know how much longer...I... can keep awake."

"Can I see it?"

"Mm hmm..." I handed her the book which she held happily. "Dustin this is great! We can learn everything!"

"..." I had passed out right that second, with one arm over Twilight, and my head right above hers. But I could still hear her talk.

"Guess it can't be helped." I heard her put the book on the table. "Mm...I love you more than anything Dustin Shafer." I felt her arms wrap around my torso and her breath on my neck. I didn't even get to dream today. The second I opened my eyes, it was already 8 o'clock in the morning. I looked down to see I was holding Twilight tightly in my arms.

(Did you guys dream?)
[...No...don't touch me...*snore* I want to punch the fat kid...]
<...>
"Hmm..." I moved my arm once. A tiny little harmless twitch. And Twilight woke up almost immediately. "Oh hey..."

"Morning!" she yawned and stretched her arms. "God what's wrong with my back? It's so...stiff..."

"Okay. Lay flat on your stomach."

"Okay." she did what I asked.

"Now stick your butt out."

"Why?" she asked with a light blush forming.

"Trust me. I do this when you're not looking."

"Okay." She stuck her butt out.

"Now move the top of your back up. I mean your shoulders and that section of your spine." she did as I asked her to do and I heard her back pop back into place.

"Oh wow! This feels great! I don't think my back has felt this good ever!"

"Get use to doing that more often than you think."

"I've never seen you do this before!"

"Oh, I do it when I'm standing up!" I stood up and bent my back forward sending the bone popping sound straight to her ears. "You've seen me do this every day!"

"I thought you had back problems."

"Nope."

"Why when your standing up?"

"Because I'm not gonna stick my ass out in that position." I said pointing to her as she was in the same spot. She threw the blanket over herself and poked her head out the end of the blanket.

"Well I still enjoyed it. But I'd like to see you do it sometime."

"Tell you what... I'll do it for you right now IF, you help me decode Faust's journal."

"What?"

"I did look through it before I came to you, and he has it worded and written completely different from what we're use to."

"Okay. I'll help you out."

"Alright." I stood on all fours.

"Get on your stomach."

"Oh so you're giving me that treatment huh?"

"Stick your butt out."

"*sigh* Anything for you." I pulled my knees closer to my chest and stuck my butt and tail up in the wind.

"Now lift the top of your torso, around the shoulder area." I did the command that I gave her a minute ago and popped my back like a proper cat. Then the door opened and Celestia walked in.

"Twilight I need...your...huh. Looking good Dustin!" she gave me a thumbs up.

"Aw...what?"

"What do you need?"

"I just need to see your for a while."

"Oh, okay. Dustin I'll help you with the journal later!" she said before running out the door.

"*sigh* Alone again..." I looked over to the basket with the apples in it. "Well it's not all bad." I said munching on one of the fruits. I looked out the window with my head in my hands as I starred at everyone in town. I saw people who I have never met before, I saw smug rich assholes... but then I saw a guy that reminded me of somebody. He had long blonde hair and I tasted iron in the air. "...Tombs?" I asked myself. It is! That's Lightning!

Oh shit! It's Lightning! I totally forgot about him!

Flashback...

"Can you look after this kid? He's a friend of mine. His name is Johnathon Tombs... but we call him Lightning." David told me.

"Sure thing Mr. Visor."

"It's David to you!"

"Yeah I'll take care of him."

End of Flashback...

"Oh my god I forgot to take care of him!" I put my hands to my face. "I hope the past 2 years haven't been too hard on him."
<I bet it was a living hell!>
[It's all of your fault Dustin!]
"Oh please don't say that!"

"Hey Lightning!" Another guard said behind him. "Back for training?"

"Yes Lt. Adler." Adler? As in... Brandon Adler? I can't tell... he's wearing a helmet. But it sounds like him none the doubt.

"Just Brandon to you." It is! It is him! "Today, you will receive your first post."

"As what?"

"Royal Guard."

"To who?"

"Twilight Sparkle and Dustin Shafer."

"Twilight Sparkle...Okay. Who are they?"

"The cute little girl walking with Celestia is Twilight. I haven't seen Dustin though. It's been two years. We went to school with him." he said pointing to my wife who was walking to the Rarity's Boutique with Celestia, no doubt to get a new outfit.

"Ah yes. I remember them now. The Dustin dude was suppose to give me lessons, but I always turned him down. Then when I heard that he died... I felt horrible for rejecting his friendship." While he was talking, I got dressed, grabbed my equipment, stuffed my pockets with apples. I also grabbed Faust's journal, in case someone tried to snatch it. I was very paranoid at this time.

"Do you remember what he looks like? Not very tall, unkempt brown hair, cat ears, a tail..."

"I never saw his ears or tail."

"...Well he's got them. The point I'm trying to make is-" he stopped when I put a hand on his shoulder.

"You need help finding a friend Lieutenant Adler."

"Ha...hahaha! Dustin!" he hugged me as tight as he could before he pulled Lightning in on this group hug. "So... Are you Mr. Sparkle or is she Mrs. Shafer?"

"We haven't decided on that yet." I said scratching the back of my head. "She'll tell me what she wants."

"How's it going...Um...Lord Shafer?" Lightning asked.

"...Are you being serious? I'm no King...least not yet. Just call me Dustin like you use to do."

"Sure thing Prince Dustin!" So he finally found my title. Well... I will admit this kid is a fast thinker. But if it's been 2 years... he's probably my age. Why is Tombs a guard and not in school? What happened when I was gone? I will ask one of the princesses when I go back in.

"Dustin, I'll talk to you later. I have a mission to file in."

"Y-yes. Of course Brandon. It was good seeing you man."

"I have to go find Twilight." Lightning spoke.

"Rarity's Boutique."

"Thank you Prince!" he said running off.

"It's Dustin! And don't you dare hit on my wife!"

(That went well.)
[...No it didn't.]
<It was awkward.>
(Very...)

But now I have an entire new city to explore. After all of this eating and resting, I'm back to 100% full strength! And who knows what kind of new opportunities will come my way! Watch out Canterlot... I'm the new assassin in town. Hmm... It's got a nice ring to it. And usually most people wouldn't be happy about being an assassin... but I'm not like most people.

This is probably the best spot for me to end this chapter. So I've been thinking... I'm going to re-write A Few Good Stallions so it's easier to understand. I mean I'll probably call it A Few Good Stallions: Rewritten and improved or something like that. I also learned that the default text for when people read this is in italics, and that's what I've been using to write things like 'in the future...' or 'back in the past' so now I'm going to put it in bold to make it easier.

I also read a book called 'The Road' by Cormac McCarthy. Boy I cried. It was the greatest environmental book I have ever read in my life! That's what I've been doing for a while now! Reading books instead of writing! It's such a strange transition... and a very satisfying one. Now I'm being forced to either A. Read the Twilight saga. Or B. Read Fifty Shades of Grey. I hate how my friends make me do these challenges. But it's all in hardy good ol' drunk fun.

IN OTHER NEWS... It appears that Twinkies are officially dead. The Hostess company is losing the long battle against Michelle Obama and all other good food haters. So do you want to know what I did? I bought the last 5 boxes of Twinkies at the Wal-Mart near me. Uh huh. I'm an asshole. So in like 20 years, I'm just going to walk out to a crowd and say 'Hey everyone!', then after I get their attention I'm going to eat a Twinkie in front of them as SLOW...AS...POSSIBLE!