The Legend of Echo the Diamond Dog
Chapter 9: [II - Prologue] "Don't make me regret this, Disarray..."
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T H E ~ D I A M O N D ~ D O G
An MLP:FIM fanfiction written by: R U S T
with editing and proofreading by: Nathan Traveler, RaiderRy4n and Flame Runner
cover art and illustrations by: stupidyou3
PART THE SECOND, PROLOGUE
In which there are... wait, who are you? What are you, put that down! Help! Hel -- ACK!
In which the Narrator is sacked and temporarily replaced by me. Yes, hello to you too. I can see you all out there, hunched over your screens, reading my words with the obsessed zeal of a drug fiend with his cocaine.
Weirdos.
It's been quite a while, hasn't it? I think that's why He let me stop by and sit a spell. It does get rather dull, floating aimlessly around in the bowels of the internet. It's nice to have an outlet again. So, how have you been? Actually, don't answer that, I don't really care....
I'll talk about myself; mostly because I enjoy tooting my own horn and I get the idea you enjoy tooting my horn as well. Things have been very strange here in the story as of late. Just because He's too lazy to show you all what's happening doesn't mean nothing is happening. Does the light go off in the refrigerator when you close it? Of course not! How else would the little fridge gnomes survive?
Honestly. Fridge gnomes. They sprinkle freshening powder on your vegetables to keep them from spoiling.
What? You think I'm lying!? MOI!?
How absurd. Go and boil your heads.
A large hand comes down from the heavens and smacks the Narrator upside the head. Get to the point, you overgrown plot device.
OW! HEY! All right, all right, I'm getting to it. Don't be such a sour-puss. I think I'm forgetting... oh, right! The job I was supposed to be doing. Ahem.
Introducing... the Second Act. His story has been divided into several part, each Act covering different and similar characters. You might be surprised as to whom we observe! Anypony is fair game, after all. Especially when He's at the helm of this doomed ship.
Now, where were we? Ah, yes.
Act Two of the Legend:
...In which friends are forever, a fallen god rises again, and I continue being sexy...
Next Chapter: [II - First] Upon the Business of Resurrection Estimated time remaining: 4 Hours, 52 MinutesAuthor's Notes:
"But wait, there's more! Call now and receive a free bobble head of yours truly, just pay additional shipping and handling. All this for the very low price of YOUR SOUL AND THE BLOOD OF YOUR FIRSTBORN!"
Disarray, get out of here.
"Spoilsport."
I created you, and I can make hilariously terrible things happen to you, as well.
"You wouldn't!"
I would, I could, and I've been waiting for the chance to make a joke involving fuzzy handcuffs.
"...I'll be good."
Damn right you will.