A human, a pony, and 576 cabbages shipwreck on a deserted island. The human wants to eat the pony. The pony wants to eat the cabbages. The cabbages aren't sapient creatures and thus have no thoughts on the matter. Reeking of untapped potential, this is a very dumb, disappointing, and unfunny--yet somehow authorized--parody of The Savage Way.

My apologies, Horse Voice. You didn't deserve this.

Speaking of undeserved, praise for the story from Cynewulf:

”Better than Waiting for Godot, more Tragic than King Lear, more filled with cabbages than a smallish box of cabbages

9/10 cabbages would lettuce this salad of destiny”