Rainbow Dash was lying sprawled out on the grass in Everfree Forest, watching the bulbous creamy clouds scroll by an otherwise pure azure sky. Were they cumulus clouds? It was one of the few weather terms she actually knew. She supposed that maybe if she could control the weather, she ought to learn a few more. At any rate, it wasn’t the most pressing of her concerns.

The striking contrast between white and blue above created a schism in her mind. The dueling desires she was contending with left her insides feeling like it was the aftermath of a terrible battle. On the one hand, she desperately wanted to relax. Just recharge so that she could take care of the problem dead in front of her: her psych project. On the other hand–?

She wanted to find her mother and get some damn answers.

Heck, why not? She had the address! She could just… Go right over there and–

Rainbow squeezed her eyes shut.

We’re supposed to be relaxing, stupid.

If only she could be like a storm cloud, ripping through open hostile skies with the lightning she felt in her belly. Then she wouldn’t need rest. Or even a plan. Just… to unload torrential hell on earth.

She winced and felt guilty for the thought.

Control your brain, featherhead! You wanna go all Dark Rainbow on everyone again?

She’d always prided herself on being badass. The unmistakable leader and glorious hero that brought mad wins and sick feats to the tapestry of legends that made up her life.

But right now…

All she wanted was the caress of her sweet girlfriend, those soft hands undoing all of her stress and worries. Except they couldn’t just have sex all the time. That wasn’t a real solution. She’d hoped that an outdoor picnic could make her well, spiritually and mentally…inasmuch as Rainbow ever thought of things “spiritually” or “mentally”, but she didn’t really know nor care about the specifics. She just wanted to feel right again.

It wasn’t that being with Fluttershy and the critters wasn’t nice. It was. Just…

She sighed roughly.

This sucks.

“Rainbow?”

She turned her head to see Fluttershy on the quilt, pulling things out of the picnic basket. A real picnic basket. Rainbow laughed when she’d seen it. It was like straight out of a 1950s painting. She didn’t feel like laughing now. Seeing her perfect girl over there with her perfect picnic made Rainbow feel out of place. When in her life did she or her family ever do something so idyllic? Never.

She was damaged goods.

Her darkening mood must have been plain because Fluttershy’s pretty blue eyes became tensed with evident concern.

“We don’t need to pretend, you know,” she murmured to Rainbow. “Just because we’re out here doing this, you can be honest with me. I know you have a lot on your mind.”

Rainbow looked back up at the sky. “I thought this was about forgetting all the bad stuff for a while?”

“It doesn’t do us much good if what you really need is to talk, Rainbow.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

A small sigh. “You want to see her… Don’t you?”

Rainbow scowled and sat up. “How’d you guess?”

She peered sidelong at Fluttershy just in time to see her girlfriend twirling a lock of her hair around a dainty manicured finger. She ran her teeth over her bottom lip before answering.

“I just thought… If it were me…” Her voice petered out. Her gaze dropped.

Rainbow’s stomach did an unpleasant flip. Of course. If given the chance to see her parents again, Fluttershy would do it in a heartbeat.

“Hey,” Rainbow said as she turned onto her hands and knees and crawled closer. “I’m sorry. I’m being a butthead.”

She kissed Fluttershy’s hand, then leaned in and kissed her girlfriend softly. Her lips were so soft, it made Rainbow flush. When the kiss ended, she pressed her forehead against Fluttershy’s and rubbed her arm.

“I guess I’m just having trouble relaxing,” Rainbow said reluctantly, casting her eyes down to the quilt they sat on. It was a very beautiful blanket. Fluttershy’s mom had been an excellent quilter. “I’m trying not to ruin the vibe, but it’s not working, I guess…”

Fluttershy held Rainbow’s face in her soft, cool hands. “Dashie...”

With a little huff, Rainbow met her eyes.

Fluttershy smiled sweetly at her. “Whatever you would like to do, I’ll support you. Okay?”

Rainbow pulled away as she jerked her head up and down in a stiff nod. She eyed the clouds. Was she crazy, or were there more of them? “Sure.”

“Would you like a sandwich?”

“Yep. Thanks.”

There was a rustling as Fluttershy retrieved the food.

Rainbow mulled over her next move. Talk? Don’t talk? Make out with Fluttershy? Angel and Tank seemed more than amused on their own. She watched them as they chirped to each other on the other side of the picnic basket, enjoying some spinach leaves together.

Fluttershy handed her the plastic-wrapped sandwich–a basic stack of swiss, avocado, tomato, and lettuce from the nearby deli. She hadn’t forgotten her promise to try a vegetarian diet for a week.

Rainbow stared at the food in her hands. She looked up.

Nope, she wasn’t seeing things. There were definitely more clouds and they were getting darker.

Her skin broke out in cold sweat.

“I’m afraid I’m gonna lose it again,” she said hoarsely.

Fluttershy looked at her in surprise. “You mean now, or–?”

“Yeah, now. Like in a ‘cause a natural disaster’ kind of way.” Rainbow swallowed through a tight throat, her eyes fixed on the clouds that had drifted over them. “It was bad that night, Shy. I really flipped out.”

Fluttershy slid over the blanket to sit next to Rainbow, making their hips touch as she draped an arm over her back. “Rainbow, you aren’t a bad person for feeling angry. It’s how you handle that anger that matters. And you stopped it from truly getting bad! You stopped it!”

Rainbow squeezed her eyes shut. Tears built up behind her eyelids. She felt her face burn, ashamed at the sudden emotion overtaking her. She had the irrational sense that the entire world could see her in her moment of weakness. Even the critters stopped their chirping, no doubt listening in.

She drew her knees up and hugged them, pressing her head down so that her forehead rested on her forearms. It hid the tears falling from her eyes, but she couldn’t keep the emotion out of her voice.

“This freaking sucks,” she sobbed.

Fluttershy hugged her, tightly, her hands rubbing her back. Rainbow realized with chagrin that this loving contact was what she’d really been craving earlier. Not more sex.

Just a lousy hug.

---

Rainbow did eventually eat. With a full belly and her eyes all cried out, she supposed she felt slightly better. It had drizzled a bit during her sudden teary episode, but nothing else seemed to occur. The dark clouds lightened and eventually drifted away without incident. Maybe Sunset was right, and there wouldn’t be any more major power spikes?

Her eyes fell shut as Fluttershy ran her fingers through her hair. They were sitting on the blanket with Shy directly behind Rainbow. Her girlfriend was trying to collect a decent section to begin braiding. Rainbow had been reluctant with her consent, but she was pleasantly surprised with a crazy relaxing scalp massage before the braiding began in earnest. Now the gentle tugging she felt as Fluttershy began her work felt nice.

“You wanna watch TV back at your house after my practice? Or we can hang in my dorm, I don’t care,” Rainbow asked languidly.

She watched as Angel ran laps around a smiling Tank. Or at least she assumed he was smiling. He followed the rabbit as best as he could, even bothering to turn on the spot. She wasn’t sure what game they were playing, but at least it looked like they were getting along and having fun.

Fluttershy answered Rainbow’s previous question after a moment of thought. “We can spend time at my house. Actually…” Her hands slowed. “Would you like to stay the night? I have an idea for dinner you may really like!”

Rainbow turned her head slightly, a small muted smile on her lips. A free meal? She supposed she wasn’t really in a position to say no to that anymore. Not that she would’ve. “Sure. That sounds great.”

She felt her hair rustle as Fluttershy let out a big sigh of relief. “Oh! I’m so glad to hear you say that!” She started braiding again, faster. “We could even watch a movie with Star Weld!”

“Yeah, that’d be cool.” She squinted one eye. But maybe not a martial arts movie. Star gets a little intense with those. She still remembered vividly his promise of ripping out the heart of anyone who hurt Shy and felt frost form on her spine.

Even on his good side, she had to admit, the guy played scary big brother damn well.

“You know, Rainbow… You, um…” Fluttershy inhaled sharply as she tried to muster the rest of the words out. “You could always stay there. Star wouldn’t mind!”

“He prob’ly wouldn’t.” Rainbow’s smile faded away. “I don’t want to put you guys out, though.”

“I know. At least… At least until your situation improves. Won’t you let us help you?” There was a pause as Fluttershy’s hands stilled. “I know that money will be tight. You were thinking about that yesterday, weren’t you? All those expenses.”

She felt Fluttershy hug her gently from behind, her slim arms encircling her torso, and her cheek resting on the back of Rainbow’s shoulder. “You’re not alone in this, Dashie. I want to help. Even if it means picking up more shifts at the vet clinic, I’ll do it because I want to and I love you!”

Rainbow’s jaw tightened, and she heard her teeth creak against the pressure.

“Is that… all right? That I said that? I didn’t offend you, did I?” Fluttershy whispered shakily. Rainbow barely heard her. The breeze was almost enough to drown Shy out, she was so quiet.

With effort, Rainbow relaxed her jaw. Her eyes fell shut as she laid a hand on Fluttershy’s arm, her thumb caressing the goosebumps raised on her girlfriend’s flushed skin. The poor girl had really gone out on a limb to say that. How far had she come to express what she felt so clearly?

“It’s all right, Flutters. I’m just not used to needing so much help,” she said. “You really are the best.”

She inclined her head to the side again. “Maybe I will stay with you for a few days. I dunno if I can swing that for long, though. I’d use up more gas commuting back and forth.”

“Not if we share a ride,” Fluttershy responded eagerly.

Rainbow shook her head. “I’ve still got gym early in the morning.”

She heard Fluttershy release a tiny whine before squeezing her midriff.

“I just said I can stay for a few days, featherbrain!” Rainbow laughed, amused by her girlfriend’s sudden consternation.

Gently freeing herself from Fluttershy’s hug, she turned so that she was sitting on her side and facing Flutters. She was delighted to see the other girl pouting, that succulent bottom lip shining in the sunlight. Her cheeks and ear tips were tinged a light pink. Her brow furrowed, producing the tiniest wrinkle.

Even disgruntled, her girlfriend was freaking adorable.

Rainbow rolled over all the way, onto her knees. She crawled closer, making Fluttershy’s eyes widen as she leaned in for a lingering kiss. She inhaled deeply, taking in that familiar lavender and mint scent she liked so much. Maybe she’d use some of Fluttershy’s shampoo too? Then she’d be comforted by the smell of her girl all day.

When she pulled away from the kiss, their lips smacking, she murmured into Fluttershy’s mouth, “Aren’t you excited to have me in your bed for a while?”

Fluttershy’s eyes became lidded.

Gently, but firmly, Shy pulled Rainbow back toward her for another kiss. Then she parted just enough to whisper against Rainbow’s lips, “That would be just lovely.”

It was really tempting not to wait for the bed.

---

Rainbow walked Fluttershy back to her class when their picnic was through. Angel ended up staying with his owner, snuggling happily in her school bag and eating carrots. Rainbow wondered if he ever pooped in Fluttershy’s bag. She almost asked, but refrained. She knew the thought may have been fueled by mild jealousy that he got to spend more time with her.

Being jealous of a rabbit was beyond cringe.

Fluttershy gave Rainbow the key to her house so that she could return the picnic stuff. She tried to encourage Rainbow to stay and rest there till her practice, but the tomboy insisted she needed to return to her dorm to pack a bag and get her uniform for practice anyway.

She did all these things and still managed to have some time left over.

Reluctantly, she sat on her dorm bed and took a crack at making some sense of the latest notes she and Fluttershy had worked on for her psych project. After nearly 30 minutes of effort, Rainbow despaired that she didn’t grasp enough. Oh sure, she got some of it. But enough to build a whole presentation and paper off of?

Sighing and rubbing so hard into her face it stung her skin, she tried to think about what to do.

Maybe I just need to quit for now? I dunno what else to do without Shy here…

And she hated it. She hated that she couldn’t keep up with this stuff. She felt dumb and rotten.

Suddenly feeling profoundly depressed, Rainbow tossed her notebook aside, rolled over and within 15 minutes she succumbed to restless sleep.

---

The practice came and went. Fluttershy, who had finished chemistry hours ago, was there watching, waving, and smiling. Rainbow once again felt bolstered at the sight of her, but even this lift in her spirits wasn’t quite enough to remove the emotional fatigue that was wearing her down.

“Dude, you okay?” Sassaflash asked with a clearly alarmed look.

“I’m fine,” Rainbow said, trying to wave it away.

“Don’t look fine, cap,” Spitfire chimed in.

Rainbow glared at them both. “The game with Griffonstone is in just a few days. You chuckleheads wanna tune into the work, or what?”

If she thought the matter was settled after that, she was wrong. She was immediately pestered with questions again after practice in the locker room showers.

“Get over it, Dash! We’re gonna worry if you’re acting all down,” Sassaflash said as she lathered her shampoo into her hair. “Just spill it, already! If you’re trying to put a brave face on things, you suck at it. Like, really.”

“Really, really,” added Spitfire in the other stall. She still had her sunglasses on. Rainbow had learned early on that it was kind of a thing with her.

Rainbow raised two hands filled with suds and blew them at both her teammates over the partitions. “You guys are a real pain. Like, really.”

“Okay, but like, REALLY. Just tell us!” Sass exclaimed, stopping to look at her friend seriously.

Rainbow met her eyes and sighed. She looked at Spitfire who also stood waiting expectantly. She thought she could feel the eyes of the other girls in the showers, and maybe even a few from over by the lockers.

“I had a fight with my dad, all right?” She bit out.

Rainbow glared a hole into the tiles across from her. “It was bad. He didn’t like me dating Fluttershy, so I told him where he could stuff it.”

Spitfire whistled.

Sassaflash didn’t react immediately at first. Rainbow half-wondered if she’d even heard her.

Then Sassaflash raised her hands and clapped once. After three whole seconds, she clapped again. Then again, but faster. Others joined her. They were doing one of those movie slow-claps, her whole team.

Rainbow looked at Sass sidelong and shook her head. “Sass, please knock it off.”

But by that point, the clapping had gained speed and was beyond her friend’s control. The whole locker room started hooting and hollering.

Rainbow closed her eyes, her fists clenching. “Guys,” she said firmly, but the team was making such a ruckus they didn’t hear. “Guys!”

The clapping and cheering finally started to die off. When it didn’t end completely, Rainbow punched the wall and screamed, “STOP! Damn it! Stop!”

Dead silence followed.

Rainbow fumbled for the shower valves and shut them off. She still had suds in her hair and on her body, but she didn’t care. She grabbed her towel off her hook along with her PVC bag of shower stuff. Hastily wrapping the towel around her body, she gazed furiously around at her team. They all stared at her, each face seized either with shock or unease.

She opened her stall and stepped out, moving to the center of the locker room so that everyone could hear her better.

“You jerks didn’t let me finish!” She spat irately, turning on the spot to eye a now distressed-looking Sassaflash with a dark look. “You see, I didn’t just stand up to my dad. I got freaking disowned, you guys. No more fancy gym. No more money. No more family. Still wanna clap?” She looked around. “Huh? What about it? No claps for that?”

Her lip curled as her teammates avoided her gaze. Even Sass. “Yeah,” she sneered. “I didn’t think so.”

Rainbow hastened to get dressed. Her hand throbbed and ached. She hadn’t broken skin with her stunt, but it would definitely be sore for a few days. She almost ran out of the locker room, but Sass and Spitfire were quick on her heels just as she met Fluttershy outside.

“Rainbow!” Sass called.

She and Spitfire were out of breath, both their hair still damp. Neither had brought their things. Sass was even still in her underwear, which made Fluttershy super obviously embarrassed. Rainbow didn’t bat an eye, mostly because she was still angry and also because at this time, hardly anyone but the team was at this part of campus anyway.

“We’re sorry,” Sassaflash said breathlessly. “Me especially. I had no idea it was that serious, and I probably should’ve taken the hint. I honestly was just trying to make you feel better, Dashie!”

“Also you’re not fucked,” Spitfire panted, pushing her aviator glasses farther up her nose. “Cuz several of the team are already chatting about pooling money for a gym membership for you.”

Rainbow’s eyes widened. “What? No way, I don’t wanna make you guys do that!”

Sassaflash held up her hands. “Figured you’d say that, which is why I asked everyone to hold off while I let the coach know ASAP. You know he’ll want to help you.” She shrugged and smiled. “One way or another, Rainbow, your training will be covered. We got you, girl. And anything else you need! You name it.”

Spitfire reached over and punched Rainbow lightly in the arm. “We’re fighting for you, cap.”

Rainbow swallowed hard against the fist that rose up in her throat. Her eyes burned suddenly and she couldn’t see for a moment.

Fluttershy, who was at her side, rubbed her back warmly.

Swiping a quick arm over her eyes to hide her tears. She laughed and said in a thick voice. “I do suck at hiding my feelings, don’t I?”

Sassaflash and Spitfire spoke simultaneously:

“Yep, you’re really bad.”

“You might be the actual worst.”

Rainbow laughed, one tear managing to slip down her cheek before she hastily wiped this away with her sore hand.

“How’s your hand?” Sass asked with a creased brow as she eyed it.

Rainbow lifted it up. It was red around her knuckles, and on the back of her middle finger, there was a darker bruise where the blood from a ruptured vein sat just under the surface. “Small bruise. Kinda sore. Can still move it, though. No biggie.”

“You still need your hand healed up, cap,” Spitfire said seriously. “Take it easy with it, all right? Want me to get some ice?” She thumbed over her shoulder.

“Nah. It’ll be fine for a second. I’ll be careful with it.” Rainbow pursed her lips and gestured at the locker room. “I’ll apologize to the others later, but I’m sorry I–”

“Nope, shut up!” Sassaflash lifted a finger. “Let’s just forget it, and I’ll try not to be a jack–”

Spitfire clapped a hand over her roommate’s mouth, her glasses slipping down enough to show her eyes had become huge with alarm.

Sassaflash frowned, then her eyebrows lifted with understanding.

Rainbow and Fluttershy watched, confusion plain on their faces, as Spitfire removed her hand, and Sassaflash took a deep breath to say–

“Jack…donkey?”

She squinted her eye and looked at Spitfire. “Is that a sanitized way of saying it?”

Rainbow’s face lit up as it finally clicked…and a wicked smile appeared on her lips. Oh yeah. That happened.

She put an arm around Fluttershy’s shoulders to lean in and murmur, “Sassaflash Pinkie Promised to never swear again.”

Fluttershy put a hand to her cheek. “Oh my!”

Rainbow frowned and looked at Spitfire. “Wait, why are you spooked? You thought it was funny last time Sass got cannoned!”

Spitfire scowled and crossed her arms. “It was funny at first! But not the second time when Pinkie busted in at 2 am with a pie to Sassaflash’s face! Who do you think was collateral damage here, cap?”

Sassaflash wagged a finger as her eyes grew wide with grim recollection. “Oof, yeah. Banana meringue on silk pajamas? Yikes!”

Spitfire’s shoulders slumped. “Those were my favorite PJs… It was a total fugazi…”

“What the heck!” Rainbow chortled. “Why at 2 am??”

“That’s what matters to you?” Spitfire asked, clearly annoyed. “She broke into our locked dorm room and ruined my clothes!”

Sass put her hands on her hips. “Hey! What about me?”

Spitfire’s face burned red. “What about you, oxygen thief?!”

But Rainbow would not be deterred.

At her eager gaze, Sassaflash sighed heavily before shrugging and shifting her weight to one foot. “I was masturbating, all right?”

Rainbow, used to her friend’s frank honesty, just rolled her eyes and let out another laugh.

Fluttershy, on the other hand, pressed hard into Rainbow’s side, her hair curtaining forward to hide half her face as she gazed at the half-naked Sassaflash wide-eyed, not unlike one did when gazing upon a wild person.

Spitfire, meanwhile, threw her hands up and walked away at a good stiff clip.

Sassaflash gazed after her anxiously. “Aw, c’mon Spitfire! Deep down you knew!”

Spitfire didn’t even turn around. “Not like that!” she hollered. Her voice echoed down the concrete hallway that led into the underground locker rooms.

Sass started to follow her, a whine slipping into her voice. “That’s mean! I’m just lonely!” No response. Sass added, “Geez! Gimme a break, I’m finally freaking single! Don’t judge me!”

Finally, Spitfire whirled around and spat, “Judge you?! I was in the fucking room! Couldn’t you at least go into the bathroom and get off in there??”

Sass bowed her head and stubbed a toe into the ground. “But it’s cold and uncomfortable in there…” She said in a simpering baby voice.

When she looked up again Spitfire had already stormed off into the shadow of the descending concrete hallway.

Sassaflash turned to Rainbow and Fluttershy and winked mischievously. “She’s not really mad about that. More annoyed that I can’t keep my mouth shut. She worries it makes her look too permissive.”

Rainbow arched an eyebrow. “'Feeling lonely', though? Not having second thoughts, right?”

Sassaflash held up her hands, “No, I meant what I said. We're through.”

Rainbow would have cheered, but she knew all too well that these matters were hardly black and white.

“I know it's hard saying goodbye to someone you care about, dude. Even if that person isn't any good in your life. I know you guys were together a long time and that isn't easy to walk away from,” Rainbow said with a look of sympathy.

Fluttershy looked at her and smiled. It looked bittersweet and knowing.

Sassaflash rubbed her arms, her chin crumpling for a second as tears rushed to her eyes. “Yeah. It sucks. He’s so troublesome, but I still kinda miss him.” She chuckled weakly and wiped at her eyes before gesturing at Rainbow. “Whatever. We both know you have it worse.”

Rainbow shook her head. “It’s not a contest, Sass.” She parted from Fluttershy’s side for a moment to step forward and give her blonde friend a one-armed hug.

“I know, I said I kinda miss him. I swear it,” Sass murmured over her shoulder. “You broke out of the status quo. When I saw that, I wanted to break out, too.”

“You’ll be all right,” Rainbow said as she pulled away. “If you wanna hang at all, just lemme know. Could use with seeing more friendly faces, these days.”

“Oh my, yes!” Fluttershy gushed, her hands clasped over her bosom as she gazed earnestly at Sassaflash. “You simply must come over for dinner one of these nights!”

Sass beamed and pulled her cell phone out from the back of her underwear. Both Shy and Rainbow did a double take.

Unperturbed, Sass asked brightly, “What’s your number, Flutters? Let’s make it happen!”

After they exchanged numbers, Sassaflash started to make her way back toward the locker rooms. “About Spitfire– Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to her!”

Rainbow wagged a finger at her. “You know she still hasn’t taken revenge for that last prank you pulled on her with the underwear on the ceiling, right?”

Sassaflash blew a raspberry as she began to walk back to the locker room, her cellphone now showing its conspicuous rectangle shape on her pert backside. “Whatever! That shizz can kiss my aspen tree. No one beats my pranks.”

As Rainbow chuckled, Fluttershy looked at her to Sassaflash, then back.

“She owns an aspen tree?” she asked with a tilt of her head.

Next Chapter: Chapter 35 Estimated time remaining: 2 Hours, 53 Minutes