What They Expect to Give
Chapter 33: Chapter 32
Previous Chapter Next ChapterWhen they landed, Rainbow felt her senses heightened. Everything seemed brighter, and the shadows ceased to be a veil. The forest was alive with the sounds of the night. Her skin tingled with every slight shift of the cool wind—
Every light caress of her lover.
Maybe it wasn’t the super-senses that Fluttershy had experienced earlier that night, but Rainbow certainly felt more alive in a way that also dismantled her careful facades.
She felt fierce...
She felt afraid.
The possibilities flashed wide in her mind like the view from a train car as it exited a dark tunnel, the window bursting with a sudden vibrant landscape rich with crisp hues of cream dotted azure skies and heaving verdant hills…
But the revelation was ripped away, almost cruelly, as the metaphorical train wound its way back into the mountain. Back into the shadows over cold steel tracks as spinning wheels barreled her closer to that ruthless tomorrow.
Rainbow held Fluttershy tight in her arms, her face buried in her girlfriend’s neck.
“Please stay with me, Flutters,” she begged quietly...and she hated herself for doing so.
She was a winner. A fighter. She wasn’t supposed to beg for anything. She wasn’t supposed to ‘need’ anyone.
Bitterly, she saw it as the lie her father propped her up with before tearing away his support. Just another way to assert his dominance over her life. Everything was a game, and Blaze always intended to win.
Fluttershy stroked Rainbow’s hair as one arm squeezed about her shoulders, and the act quieted the rising shame and anger.
“I’ll stay with you,” Shy murmured.
They returned to the dorm. Fluttershy borrowed some of Rainbow’s clothes and took a shower. Rainbow sat on the bed with Tank and tried to think on what to do the next day.
The heightened awareness had gone. Now she only felt tired and weary. She tried to take some comfort in her newfound calm, even if it was one borne of resignation.
“If I skip class, I’ll have a lot of time,” she murmured to Tank. Her brow tightened a little. “Maybe I can swing by my dad’s place and grab my stuff while he’s out? Or do you think I should wait?”
Rainbow looked at Tank. The tortoise retreated a little in his shell. She hummed thoughtfully. “Yeah… I guess you’re right. I’ll give it a day or two, then.”
Her eyes turned up to the ceiling. “My scholarship isn’t a full ride, Tank. That means it covers my tuition and that’s about it.” Rainbow’s eyebrows lifted as she wrestled a detail from the ether of her deep memories. “It… does give me a little extra, though. Not much. It was mostly supposed to be for food and bus fares.”
Rainbow’s eyes squeezed shut. “It won’t be enough for my phone. My dad will kill that for sure, anyway. I gotta get a new one. A pay-as-you-go phone, I guess?”
Her mouth screwed to the side and she creaked one eye open. “If I stop driving so much I can save on gas. I could use that extra money for other stuff. It’s not like I need to actually go anywhere off-campus. Everything is right here.”
She sighed roughly and hung her head. “Almost everything… My dad will kill my gym membership, too. He only let me have that because I begged him to let me train on my own a little.”
Naturally, ‘a little’ turned into ‘a lot’. Having a taste of freedom from Blaze had been too much to resist. She doubted his allowing it had been from any true generosity, though. Her father was probably just interested in hiding his business struggles from her. If that were truly the case, she supposed it worked.
Her gaze darkened as she glared at her knees. “My dad’s such a liar.”
Tank re-emerged from his shell. His scaly head butted her hand gently. It’ll be okay. I’m here, he seemed to be trying to tell her.
She looked at him and smiled softly. “Thanks, buddy.”
Rainbow took a deep breath and raised her eyes again, her attention now falling on the light coming from under the bathroom door. The shower had turned off.
“I’ll figure something out,” she said quietly. “Maybe my dad hasn’t killed my membership yet. I can try and stop in one last time.” She sighed as she reached over and adjusted her alarm. If she was skipping class, she could sleep in a little before heading in. She’d need it.
“Maybe coach or Sass can help after that,” she continued. “Worst case, the university has a small gym, right?”
Though whether the campus gym had everything she’d come to rely on was another issue. Not all gyms were equal, and Rainbow had been training at an intense level. If her routine changed too much, it could affect her performance.
“There’s gotta be a way,” Rainbow whispered tightly.
The bathroom door opened, and Fluttershy emerged, dressed in a plain blue t-shirt that hung loose on her body, and a soft pair of green cotton shorts. The shy girl tucked her chin upon seeing Rainbow, but she smiled warmly as she undid her hair tie. Her pink hair fell over her shoulders, mostly dry save for those few locks that managed to get damp in places.
“Are you sure Sunset won’t mind me staying the night?” Fluttershy asked as she neared. She knelt at Rainbow’s feet and kindly stroked Tank’s head. The reptile turned to her with a slow blink of his eyes.
Rainbow waved away Fluttershy’s concern. “Why wouldn’t Sunset be cool with it? We’ve had sleepovers loads of times.” She pointed at her phone on her bedside table. “But if you’re that worried about it, I sent her a text to let her know.”
She regarded her phone with a frown, feeling her stomach lurch unpleasantly at the thought of waking up to see her service was cut.
Fluttershy rose and sat next to Rainbow on the bed. Her hand laid over the tomboy’s. “Dashie?”
Rainbow looked at her and forced a smile. “Sorry,” she murmured. She took hold of Fluttershy’s hand and raised it to her lips, kissing it softly. “Thanks for staying with me.”
Her eyes dropped down to Tank. The tortoise was looking at her with lidded eyes.
“Tank thinks I should wait before getting my stuff from my dad’s,” Rainbow said.
“I think he’s right,” Fluttershy replied. She rested her head on Rainbow’s shoulder, her hand caressing her girlfriend’s thigh through her pajama pants. “These are things you can focus on later. Right now, why don’t we get some rest?”
“I don’t know if I can sleep,” Rainbow admitted with a little fidget. The anxiety that had been pushing at her resigned calm was forming cracks, and the fear was spilling through. “Fluttershy, what am I going to—?”
Fluttershy lifted her head, grabbed Rainbow’s face, and kissed her firmly.
Rainbow’s eyes went wide at this uncharacteristic forwardness and she fell silent against Fluttershy’s soft mouth.
When Fluttershy pulled away, she bit her lower lip and peered at Rainbow beneath a creased brow. “S-Sorry…” she mumbled. “I just didn’t want you to spiral again.”
Rainbow blinked, still trying to gather her composure. Her heart was doing drum rolls. “Uh… No biggie?”
With effort, she reminded herself that Sunset could return to the dorm at any time…
But her nipples perked and the warmth pooled between her legs all the same.
Fluttershy turned and crawled up the bed, flashing her cute soft butt under the generous cut of the short shorts, and that absolutely did not help in easing Rainbow’s growing heat, but when the girl put her head on one of Rainbow’s pillows, the tomboy bit her tongue and took a deep breath.
Tonight wasn’t about that. Just having Fluttershy here, looking at her with love, was more than enough.
Fluttershy held her arms out, the corners of her plush lips curling up into her round cheeks to form those charming dimples. “Please lay with me?”
Rainbow needed no further invitation. She gave Tank a quick kiss, set him on the floor, then scooted up the bed and laid her head on Fluttershy’s cushy chest. Her girlfriend’s arms wrapped around her, gentle and warm, and Rainbow’s eyes eased shut.
Still, even as she listened to Fluttershy’s steady heartbeat, she could feel the worm of anxiety try to eat its way through her again. She could feel it try to grow…
Then without a word, Fluttershy began to sing, softly. She sang no words, only a pleasing melody that Rainbow could feel straight down to the marrow. It reverberated through her, just a soothing vibration…
When Rainbow Dash’s alarm went off, it was with the sudden realization that she had, in fact, fallen asleep, and not only that, but Sunset Shimmer had returned.
The tomboy sat slouched, her legs over the edge of the bed as she blinked blearily across the room at her roommate. The other girl didn’t stir.
Rainbow reached over and shut off her alarm. It was almost five o'clock. A late start for her. Somehow she still felt exhausted.
Fluttershy shifted, and the tomboy looked over her shoulder at her with a wince.
“Dang. Didn’t mean for that to wake you,” Rainbow whispered apologetically.
Fluttershy scooted closer, her arm reaching around to stroke Rainbow’s stomach through her t-shirt with a sleepy smile. Her hair wreathed around her head like she’d been rolling around in her sleep.
“It’s okay, Dashie,” she whispered back. “Off to the gym?”
Rainbow winced again. “Yeah. With the game this weekend, I can’t skip out on training. I’ll be done soon. Do you wanna sleep here some more, or should I take you back home?” She rubbed her neck and blushed. “I didn’t really think about what a pain this could be for you, Flutters. M’sorry.”
Fluttershy shook her head. “No, Dashie. I wanted to be with you.” She patted the bed. “I can stay here.” Her shoulders crept toward her ears as her forehead wrinkled a little. “Um. May I borrow your laptop, though? I’d like to e-mail Professor Zecora. I might be able to study a little, too.”
Rainbow nodded eagerly, glad that she hadn’t inconvenienced Fluttershy too much. “Sure! When I get back, we can stop by your place so you can change or get whatever you want, and then maybe… I dunno.”
Her first thought had been, Breakfast! But then she remembered she was going to need to save money, now. She supposed eating on campus was an option. The meals were a little cheaper, if less glamorous. But were the cafeterias even going to be serving food by the time they got back? She wasn’t as familiar with the campus food schedules.
She frowned, feeling the anxiety nip at her yet again. “What are we going to do all day?” A broad, but easy question. She felt a little guilty laying it at Fluttershy’s feet.
Some leader I am...
“We relax,” Fluttershy said firmly. “Or at the very least, try to channel ourselves into something positive.”
She raised herself on one arm and touched Rainbow’s cheek, her sleepiness giving way to earnest care. “We’ve both been through a lot the last twenty-four hours. You more than me. It’ll be good to slow down.”
Fluttershy’s thumb caressed Rainbow’s cheek as she regarded her with a smile. “We can’t heal in a day. But we can start to.”
Rainbow nodded once, feeling her love for Fluttershy swell and fill her every inch. She kissed Fluttershy’s palm, then her wrist, before kissing her on the mouth.
She kept it brief, worried that her morning breath would put Fluttershy off, but when she pulled away, her girlfriend was smiling broadly.
“I love you, Rainbow,” she whispered.
Rainbow felt her throat tighten with emotion. Her heart felt like it was on fire. Would she feel this way every time the words were said aloud? Every time she said— “I love you, Fluttershy.”
She hoped it would last forever.
Rainbow rose and set about getting ready, energized and encouraged. After all…
The sooner she was done with her workout, the sooner she could be with Fluttershy again.
After Rainbow left, Fluttershy reclined back in the bed again. She closed her eyes and drifted off, but was soon awoken by another alarm—this time Sunset Shimmer’s.
Only the other girl didn’t rise to turn it off.
Fluttershy felt her stomach tighten. This certainly wasn’t a predicament she’d anticipated, and she was not all that happy to be faced with it. Did she wake Sunset up herself? Did she turn the alarm off and go back to sleep? Did she sit and wait for the alarm to pierce her friend’s deep rest?
Fluttershy sighed with suffering.
No. Clearly she needed to wake her friend. She just felt rude doing so. After all, she was the visitor here.
“Sunset?” she called, softly. Quietly.
No answer.
Fluttershy felt her armpits dampen with stress as she sat up and tried again, a little louder. “Sunset?”
Sunset Shimmer stirred, and Fluttershy quailed, her eyes going wide. Had she been too loud?
But then Sunset only curled tight into a ball.
Fluttershy’s eyes closed with torment. Her friend wanted to keep sleeping. She hated being part of an unwanted awakening. Years of living with Star Weld had made her dread the role. But if Sunset were late to something important…?
Fluttershy placed her feet on the floor and stood. “Sunset…” she said, speaking finally at a normal volume. “I’m sorry, but your alarm is going off. A-Are you ignoring it for a reason, or—?” She touched Sunset’s shoulder.
Sunset Shimmer shot up, inhaling sharply, her eyes snapping wide open but seeing nothing. She grabbed Fluttershy tightly by the arm, making the shy girl squeal in surprise as she was pulled halfway down.
Sunset froze, her eyes beholding Fluttershy’s fearful face. She released her friend quickly, her face tensing in bewilderment. “Flutters?”
Her eyes batted rapidly and she turned her head to look at her alarm clock. It was a quarter past six.
Fluttershy took a quick step away from Sunset’s bed, her eyes like great circles, and her mouth turned down with uneasiness. “I’m s-sorry, Sunset! I didn’t mean to startle you!”
Sunset groaned. She turned the alarm off and drew a knee up to lean on it. She buried her face in the crook of her arm. “No, no! I’m the one who should be apologizing. I was half-dreaming still.” She turned her head and looked at Shy, her brows tensed with concern. “I didn’t hurt your arm, did I?”
Fluttershy shook her head quickly, glad to feel her heartbeat was slowing. “No. I’m all right.”
She bit her lip and wrung her hands. “Were you having a bad dream?”
Sunset’s gaze ticked down toward the bed as her lips puckered in thought. “I definitely wouldn’t call it a good one.” Her eyes slipped closed. “I was dreaming about my life before I met you all. Before I even started at Canterlot High.”
Fluttershy sat on the end of Sunset’s bed. “That must have been a difficult time. You’ve never talked about it with our friends.”
Sunset lifted her head up to rest her chin on her arm as she peered at Fluttershy carefully. “I know you all think I was the worst when I was in high school, but… I did awful things to survive here in the beginning.”
She swallowed audibly as her gaze fell once more. “I was ruthless. I clawed for opportunities to make my plans come to life, and I didn’t care about the damage I left behind.” Her brow tightened. “The… people I left behind.”
Sunset shook her head. “It’s not something I like revisiting.”
Fluttershy kneaded the flesh between her thumb and index finger, trying to work away the last trembles from her recent scare. She mused as she did so.
Sunset said this wasn’t a topic she liked to discuss… but maybe she needed to? Oh, but Fluttershy didn’t want to make her friend uncomfortable! And what did she know, anyway? Sunset only had a bad dream. Sometimes that’s all it was. An unpleasant blip from the mind.
But a single question floated from Fluttershy’s throat, soft and teeny.
“Can we help the people you left behind?”
The silence that followed was thick.
Sunset’s expression melted to something doleful. Fluttershy could feel her stomach revolt inside her, angry that she’d been so presumptuous to think that she could do anything but make it worse.
“I’m sorry!” Fluttershy rushed out tremulously. “You seemed troubled like this was something you’ve been worrying about. I shouldn’t have assumed—!”
“It’s all right,” Sunset said. She smiled but it looked like it took effort. “I’ve asked myself the same question recently.”
She shifted so that she was sitting slouched and cross-legged. “I didn’t really find an answer, though. The people I left behind haven’t really demonstrated a desire to actually change.”
Fluttershy bit her lip as something rose up, dividing her anxiety. She saw a damaging misconception, and no matter how uncomfortable it was, a good friend would try to point it out.
After steeling her nerve, she murmured, “N-Neither did you, Sunset.”
Sunset looked at her with surprise.
Fluttershy held up her hands as if she could ward away any hurt feelings. “Please! Don’t take that the wrong way. I only meant that…”
She slid closer, placing a hand on Sunset’s knee. Fluttershy smiled shakily. “I only meant that breakthroughs can be hard sometimes.”
Her head tilted to the side as her sleek brows pushed towards each other. “In the past, I thought that a gentle hand was always best. But not every situation calls for that. Sometimes… Sometimes you have to be firm.”
Fluttershy’s forehead creased as her tense brows lifted. “Especially if it means saving a life.”
She held Sunset’s wide eyes, hoping her friend could hear her. Her next words came with slow deliberation. “That’s what’s at stake, isn’t it? If there’s someone you think that has the capacity to change, but just lacks the motivation… Maybe all they need is you to get there?”
Sunset’s mouth fell open a little. She blinked once.
“Wow,” she finally managed to say. “Fluttershy, you’re… um…” She squeezed her eyes shut. “Uncomfortable, sometimes.”
Fluttershy felt her cheeks burn hot. She pulled back her hand and looked down at her lap. “M’sorry,” she mumbled.
Sunset Shimmer laughed and scooted to sit next to her friend. She threw an arm over her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. “No way! This… this was good.”
She bobbed her head from side to side with a light Eeeh! and added, “Maybe a bigger dose of truth than I would have liked in the morning—”
Fluttershy covered her face with her hands. “M’sorry!” she squeaked again.
Why couldn’t she keep her mouth shut, lately? What was going on with her?
“But it was totally worth it,” Sunset continued firmly, “and I appreciate your kind advice.”
She laid her head on Fluttershy’s and said in a haltingly simpering tone, “So please... don’t… beat... yourself... up! Pretty please?”
Fluttershy, with effort, lifted her face from her hands and peered at her friend. Sunset Shimmer regarded her with a crooked grin.
“Pwetty pwease?” she repeated in a silly voice.
Fluttershy tried to keep the smile off her face, but she knew the effort was lost when Sunset released a tight snicker. Within a short moment, both were giggling happily.
When they’d calmed down, Sunset stood up from the bed and stretched. “Ugh! I guess I can start getting ready.”
Fluttershy looked up at her with wide eyes. “I thought you enjoyed your classes!”
Sunset chuckled. “I like my classes… to a point. This semester is a bit rough when I’m covering—” she held up her hand and started ticking off fingers, “Applied linear algebra, development of quantum physics, principles of biology, my undergraduate research with Twilight, and global environmental history.”
Fluttershy’s eyebrows rose. “Oh my…”
Sunset chuckled again. “It’s all right. I can handle it.” She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “I just wish I didn’t have all this other stuff on my mind, too.”
She snapped her fingers and dropped a fist into her waiting palm. “Which reminds me! I wanted to send Princess Twilight another message.”
Sunset crossed her arms and looked at her magical journal on her bedside table. “She hasn’t gotten back to me yet, which probably means she’s dealing with something super important, but maybe Spike will see the message and take it to Starlight Glimmer? She’d be just as amazing at helping with Rarity’s problem.”
She let out a harsh breath. “In the meantime, we have to keep an eye on Rarity. Pinkie’s in the best place to do that, but she can’t stay by her side all day.”
“I can check on her between classes,” Fluttershy said eagerly.
Sunset gave a short nod. “I can try too. The Visual Arts Center is a bit of a walk for me from the science buildings, but Rockhoof Hall, where I take my history class, is close.”
Then the redhead looked at Fluttershy with sudden interest that made the shy girl nervous.
“How’re your senses? Any changes this morning?” Sunset asked with a serious expression.
Fluttershy tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Umm… No?”
A small smile spread across Sunset’s face. “Good.” Her eyebrow arched. “Since you stayed the night here, you and Rainbow must intend to take the day easy, huh?”
Fluttershy nodded. “Yes. She’s still struggling with what happened.” She looked down as she wiggled her toes on the carpet. Tank was by her feet, looking up at her. She was glad to see his eyes were starting to look better. Rainbow was doing a good job caring for him.
“I want to make sure she’s okay,” Fluttershy said, lifting her eyes again. “I think these next few days will be the hardest for her.”
Sunset hummed and shifted her weight to one foot. “Yeah. I bet Blaze will mess with her head again before the week is through.”
Fluttershy frowned and looked back to her feet. “He’s a mean man. I… I don’t like him.”
She disliked admitting this, but somehow, saying the words took a weight off her heart. She could forgive so many things… But the more she saw of Blaze, the less Fluttershy thought he had the capacity for change.
“None of us like him, Shy,” Sunset said gently, as if sensing Fluttershy’s distaste for the stance. “Now that he’s out of Rainbow’s life, maybe she can start working through everything else, too.”
Fluttershy regarded Sunset with confusion. “Everything else?”
Sunset stared at her friend, her expression going blank. “Oh.” Her eyes tensed. “Oh boy…”
Fluttershy stood, her hands wringing as concern flared white hot inside her. “Sunset, what else happened to Rainbow? Was it recent??”
Sunset rubbed at her forehead and placed a hand on her hip. “No, it wasn’t recent.”
“Then what—”
Sunset held up a quieting hand, her face long with suffering. “I was dumb to assume Rainbow told you, but it’s really not my place to say, Shy.” She looked at Fluttershy apologetically. “You can try to ask her yourself. Tell her it’s my fault. She can yell at me later.”
Fluttershy chewed the corner of her lip, her hands wringing themselves so hard, her skin stung.
“All right,” she said eventually.
Sunset sat on the bed and grabbed her magic journal and a pen. “Hey, seriously. This is old stuff. She probably didn’t want to mention it because it happened so long ago. I wouldn’t worry too much, okay?”
Fluttershy sat on Rainbow’s bed with a small pout. Not worry? How could she not worry?
But it did make her feel a little less panicky to think that this other thing hadn’t happened recently. “Of course. You’re right, Sunset. I’ll stay calm.”
Sunset opened the journal and started writing a hasty note. She glanced up at Fluttershy and flashed her a smile. “Atta girl.”
She shut the journal and returned it to its place before rising. “I’d love to stay and keep chatting, Shy, but I have to get going.”
She went to her dresser next to her desk and quickly pulled open a number of drawers, extracting jeans, a t-shirt, and smaller items.
Fluttershy carefully grabbed Rainbow’s laptop from her girlfriend’s bedside table and opened it. She tapped the keyboard, waiting for the device screen to light up.
She heard Sunset enter the bathroom. There was the clatter of movement. The shower turned on…
But it shut off abruptly.
The bathroom door wrenched open and Sunset took a step out onto the carpet, her eyes wide with sudden disquiet as she looked at her dresser, then into the bathroom, and back again.
Fluttershy’s hands paused over the laptop keyboard as the screen came to life. She eyed her friend with concern. “Sunset?”
Sunset didn’t look at her. She ran a hand through her hair as she looked back into the bathroom once more. She chewed her lip.
After a long moment, she murmured, “I’m... overthinking this.” Her voice sounded taut.
Fluttershy sat up straighter. “Overthinking what?”
Sunset’s eyes finally landed on her friend, and Fluttershy could see the glint of panic in her cyan eyes. Her gaze searched Fluttershy’s face as an internal debate waged.
Then carefully, she said, “I’m overthinking what to wear.”
Fluttershy’s eyebrow tilted up. “Um… Are you... trying to impress someone?”
She tried not to make assumptions.
She failed as her curiosity ran rampant with her imagination.
In the years she’d known Sunset, she’d never seen the girl worried about putting on a good look. Certainly she’d fretted a great deal about how she behaved, but never about being able to look good.
If there was one thing from Sunset’s old nature that remained, it was an almost arrogant confidence in her style. Seeing her doubt that all of a sudden…
Fluttershy’s heart sped up with excitement. Maybe she has feelings for a boy?
Sunset’s gaze narrowed. “‘Am I trying to impress someone’... That’s the question, isn’t it?” She chewed her lip again and looked at the bathroom mirror. From where Fluttershy sat, she could just catch the edge of the reflection—and the troubled look on Sunset’s face.
Fluttershy slowly pushed the laptop away. This clearly needed her full attention.
“Do you want to answer the question?” she asked carefully.
Sunset let out a single, harsh laugh, her eyes turning down to her toes. She leaned her back on the doorway and ran her tongue along the inside of her lip.
After another moment, she murmured, “I’ve been avoiding the answer, I think.” Her eyes widened under her furrowed brow. “For a while, even, if I’m being completely honest.”
Fluttershy blinked and tilted her head to the side. “Why?”
Sunset leaned her head back. Her throat moved with a tense swallow. “Because if the answer is yes, then that complicates things I didn’t want complicated.”
Fluttershy drew her knees up and hugged them. “Is the other person in a relationship?”
Sunset’s cheeks gained a warm glow. “I never said this was an attraction, Fluttershy.” Her eyes slid sideways to take in Fluttershy’s small wince.
“I know,” Fluttershy admitted. “But you’d hardly be this worried if you were just trying to impress, say, a supervisor at a job interview.”
Sunset sucked at her teeth and held up her hands. “Fine. You got me.” She pouted. “To answer your other question— No. The other person isn’t in a relationship. But I also know they have feelings for someone else.”
Fluttershy nodded in sympathy. “I know what that’s like. I’m sorry.”
Sunset shook her head. “That isn’t the problem. They can’t get with the person they love. What worries me is…” she scowled and knocked the back of her head lightly on the doorframe. “Damn it.”
Fluttershy turned on the bed to fully face her friend, her eyes wide with concern. “Sunset, are you afraid of getting hurt?”
“Not me,” Sunset answered quickly. Her eyes slipped shut. “The other person.”
Intuition pulsed.
Fluttershy’s heart beat harder in her chest as she quietly asked her next question. “And has… she... signaled no interest?”
Sunset’s dusky skin became very flush. She swallowed again, loudly, before fixing a steady gaze on Fluttershy. She didn’t blink, though it appeared to take effort not to. Her eyes glistened.
Fluttershy stiffened, her gaze growing massive and her lips pinching thin, but she held her friend’s stare. She had the strange sense that looking away was failing some unspoken test of trust and sincerity. A deep-seated pony custom, perhaps?
The shy girl’s palms grew sweaty and she wanted nothing more than to drop her eyes and apologize profusely. The words even started up her throat, and she barely swallowed them in a low mewl that pushed against her pinched mouth.
But her eyes held.
Sunset’s gaze softened. Her body slouched against the door frame. Her next words came on a shaky breath. “She… has never said anything about it, one way or the other.”
Fluttershy closed her eyes with relief.
After taking a second to gather herself, she asked in a low voice, “So you think you could seduce her?”
“Will it sound too arrogant if I say I know I can?”
“It depends,” Fluttershy admitted, creaking one eye open. “Why do you think it would be so easy?”
Sunset had slid down the door frame and was now sitting on the floor with her elbows on her parted knees. The look of disquiet had returned to her features, creating lines of worry along her forehead and around her almond-shaped eyes.
“Because the other girl is vulnerable right now,” Sunset murmured. “She isn’t in a relationship, and as far as I know, hasn’t been in one for a while. But her hopes for the person she likes have been crushed.”
Sunset peered at Fluttershy sidelong. “You could say she’s on the rebound.”
Fluttershy nodded, understanding settling in. Though she was sad to hear of Sunset’s plight, she felt relieved at having more information. She didn’t have to stumble through the conversation anymore.
“So you feel that if you acted on your attraction for her, you’d be taking advantage of this girl?” she asked gently.
Sunset nodded once without a word.
Fluttershy hummed, her eyes turning up in thought.
She knew what it was like to have feelings for someone involved with someone else. In Fluttershy’s case, she’d had to sit by and watch Rainbow date girls for years.
But by Sunset’s own words, this girl wasn’t in a relationship. Might have even been single for a while. She was only coming off of the realization that her romantic hopes were in vain. Was it really so wrong to pursue someone in that position?
Then a more salient question struck her.
Fluttershy asked, “If the girl accepted how you felt, wouldn’t that be a part of her healing?”
Sunset’s eyes blinked quickly. She looked at Fluttershy. “I mean, maybe?”
Fluttershy shrugged. “You said you aren’t afraid of getting hurt, right?”
“Uh, right?”
“If your only concern is for the girl, then I wouldn’t worry.” Fluttershy touched the place over her heart, her gaze unfocusing as she looked to the window.
Through the curtains, she could see the blue sky. The same sky she and Rainbow had flown through mere hours before, confessing their love. None of that would have been possible had they not taken the chance to be together.
“So long as you’re considerate of how you do it, then trying to catch her attention is hardly a bad thing,” she went on softly. “It might encourage her to see a new way forward. One where she can be happy with you.”
Fluttershy smiled again, wider this time. She met Sunset’s wide eyes. “You care about how others feel, Sunset. I don’t think you’d be this worried if you didn’t have the girl’s best interest at heart. That alone speaks volumes!”
She tucked her chin a little and added, “And I know you can be a private person, so I understand not saying anything about liking girls before now. But it’s nothing that affects our friendship… okay?”
Sunset’s eyes became more than just glistening, they suddenly swam with unshed tears. She inhaled deeply, then let it all out in a harsh, hurried exhale. She wiped at her eyes and her lips pulled up in a quivering grin.
“Thanks, Flutters,” she said with a thick voice. She sniffled and wiped at her eyes again. “I, uh, didn’t think that would be so scary.” She frowned and looked at her palms. They trembled a little. “I always told myself I didn’t care. That I was just being private to avoid looking like I was seeking attention.”
She inhaled and exhaled again, faster this time, one hand rubbing over her left breast. “But geez, my heart is racing! I guess I was more fearful than I thought.”
“It can be a little scary,” Fluttershy said with understanding. “I suppose it was easier for me because everyone I cared about already knew.”
Sunset nodded her head jerkily. “Yeah.” She looked at her friend. “I’m bisexual, by the way. I, um… I like both guys and girls.” She winced and shrugged one shoulder. “I don’t know where I am on the bi-spectrum, so please don’t ask.”
Fluttershy shrugged. “I hardly think that matters, Sun.”
“Right.” Sunset grinned again, and a small nervous giggle escaped. “Of course. You’re totally right.”
Fluttershy stood from the bed and went to kneel by Sunset. She held her arms out. “Hug?” she asked with a kind smile.
Sunset laughed, and the sound felt stronger. She turned and spread her arms, and the two girls embraced.
Over her shoulder, Fluttershy whispered, “Wear what you want, Sunset. Don’t be afraid like me. I lost so much time because of that.”
Sunset sighed. “All right.”
They pulled apart, and Sunset stood up. She held a hand out to Fluttershy, who took it and rose with her friend’s help.
Sunset flashed her teeth in a broad smile. “Y’know, in Equestria, your pony counterpart was the spiritual successor to the pillar of healing. More than just kind, she was famous for her wisdom.” She squeezed Fluttershy’s hand. “I see that in you, too.”
Fluttershy’s cheeks heated up and she let her uncombed forelock slip forward over one eye. She didn’t really know what to say, so she opted for a timid smile.
Sunset put her hands on her hips and looked at her clothes, which were folded neatly on the closed toilet seat. They weren’t dull selections, at least by Fluttershy’s standards, but she knew her friend was capable of something more eye-catching.
“No more fear, huh?” Sunset’s eyebrow arched high as she smirked. “Sure. Let’s mix it up, then...”
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