My eyes shot open as I let out a light gasp. Looking up at the metal ceiling above me, I blinked a few times in confusion. Turning my head, I felt as the pillow under it was matted with sweat. However, looking over toward Buck’s terminal, I found his chair empty, and the terminal screen dark.

The sound of sizzling food from through the open door to the Rec area filled the container, and shortly after, the delicious smell of cooking vegetables met my nose. Bringing my forehooves out from under the blanket draped over me, I rubbed at my eyes, trying to force myself to stay awake this time. Looking at my forehooves, I stopped to admire at the deep blue of them for a moment. I’d wondered if over time they’d get lighter, but looking at them now, I guessed that they’d be a deeper blue than my coat forever. Giving off a soft groan, I froze and perked my ears.

“So,” Buck’s voice resonated clearly through the open air, “you’re sure you saw Night walking through the market?”

“Yeah.” Hardcase grunted. “Same guy who showed up in Carmacks, I’m sure of it.” He spoke, making the bench by the radio creak as he shifted on it. “I wish that he’d stop copying ponies from our convoy.”

Wait, copying!?

“Hey!” I called out to them, throwing the quilted blanket off of me and scrambling to get out of bed. “You guys are talking about Salt, rig…” That was about as far as I’d made it before I went crashing down to the container floor.

“Shit!” Hardcase gasped before he bolted inside. His magic wrapped around me and helped to push me back up to my hooves. “Bombay, are you alright?” Looking at me, he held his hoof out for me to grab. I felt light headed for a moment, and kept a tight hold of his hoof until it passed.

“Yeah, just still a bit woozy I guess.” I laughed, looking up as Buck came in. “Hey, what’s for…” I tried to say and walk over to him, but found myself flat on my face for a second time. Instead of Hardcase’s magic, Buck’s enormous paw scooped under me and pulled me up off the floor.

“Night,” Buck whined before pulling me close against his chest. “I… I’m so sorry.” He whimpered, squeezing me in the most awkward manner.

“What’s going on?” Pushing against him, I couldn’t deny that I loved being this close to him, but this was a bit much. “You’re acting really strange.” Looking as he pulled his head back for a moment, he gave me a worried and disappointed glance at me. Gazing into his eyes, I locked up. “Okay, Buck, you’re scaring me.”

“You… can’t feel it?” Hardcase struggled to get out.

“What?” I asked. What was this, wasteland national riddle day? “Guys, what’s...” Shifting myself in Buck’s coddling hold, I stopped halfway around as only part of me swung over. Looking down, I stared at myself, finding an asymmetrical shape sitting in my vision. I wiggled my rear left hoof against Buck’s fur, and watched it move. But when I went to wiggle my right… only empty air sat where it should have been.

“You were hit above the hock with a shot from Double Drum’s Anti-Machine rifle.” Buck spoke softly. “I did my best to save what I could, but…” Staring at the patchy sky blue fur that covered the mostly bandaged stump, I almost couldn’t believe it. Trailing dark pink lines of scar tissue ran out from under the bandages, pointing down to where the rest of my leg once sat. Immediately it made me think I was looking not at my own leg, but simply the scars that ran on both Lucky and Gearbox’s stumps. “I only ended up saving part of your leg. I’m sorry.” Buck sighed.

It was just… gone. Blinking a few times, I stared at where my right hind leg should be, but it was just… gone. My chest tightened, and I felt my throat tighten up with it. It was becoming harder to breathe, and I reached over for Buck to help me.

He lifted me up, pulling me closer into his neck as he ran his paw up and down my back.

“It’s alright, everything’s fine, Night.” He spoke into my ear as I started to hyperventilate.

“No, it can’t just be gone, not like that.” Surely I would have remembered losing it! “This is all just some sort of bad joke! Right?” I asked, pressing myself against Buck’s neck as even though I tried to convince myself it wasn’t real, now that I’d seen it, I could feel that nothing was where my leg was supposed to be. “Right?”

Whimpering turned into tears as I sat there with the truth plainly in my mind. Crying out, I pressed myself against Buck as hard as I could and just let go. Why? Why did this have to happen to me? I lost my home. I lost my parents. Now I’d lost my leg. Why does everything keep getting taken from me? What the fuck did I do to deserve this!?

“It’s alright.” Buck said softly, walking us over to his bed. “Just let it all out, it’s perfectly normal.” Listening as he held me tightly against himself, that’s what I did. “It’ll be okay, Night.” He said softly before turning us around. Sitting down onto his bed, he rolled and laid down so I’d be on top of him. “We’re going to get through this.”

“What do you mean we.” I snapped at him, still burrowing my muzzle against his matted chest. This was my problem. I was the one with the fucking missing leg! I… that... I shouldn’t have said it like that. He’s done nothing but helped me at every turn. He doesn’t deserve that. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it...” I whined, feeling as he reached up and brushed his claws through my mane.

“It’s okay, I understand.” He sighed, taking deep breaths as he spoke. “You’ve been through so much, Night.” He whispered to me, drawing back my mane from around my face. “You’re such a strong pony. You can’t let this bring you down.” Reaching up, he pressed a claw under my chin and pulled it up. Looking up at him, I found his bright blue eyes streaming tears down his own cheeks. “I can’t bear to see you like this, Night. I want you to be every bit as happy as you’ve made me.”

I whimpered, grabbing around him tightly. “Please just… stay with me.”

“I don’t ever want to leave you, Night.” He smiled and leaned forward. Planting a small kiss on my forehead, he held me in his arms. I pressed myself against his warm fur, and prayed for this to be nothing more than another bad dream that I could wake up from, and go back to my boring old life again...

It had been another hour or so of me pressed into Buck’s hold before I’d felt like the shock from seeing my… stump, started to wear off. The others in the convoy had apparently all left to go do some errands in Destruction Bay, and had left Buck and I all to ourselves on Bertha. Part of me felt like my crying and whimpering had been too pathetic for them to watch, but I couldn’t say that. Not when the others had become the closest thing I’d felt to family outside of mom and dad.

Sitting in Buck’s warm grasp however, I knew that this must have weighed heavily on him. Knowing what he had to do, trying as hard as he had to save what he could. All on the pony that he’d grown the closest to on this crew. I owed him a debt that was more than I’d ever be able to repay in a thousand lifetimes. Yet, all I could think, was that he deserved better than a three legged pegasus who couldn’t fly well…

“Hey.” He whispered into my ear. Softly rubbing along my back, he looked down at me with his caring gaze. “Don’t you ever think that you’re not anything more than I could ever want.”

“What…?” I froze up on him. How did he… I… can he read my mind!?

Buck gave a soft chuckle. “No, I can’t read your mind,” He said before scrunching up his muzzle. “If that’s what you were thinking.” Running his claws over my feathers, he softly sighed as he nuzzled me. “You tend to have an odd twitch to your ears whenever you seem down about yourself.”

“Figures.” I groaned and drove my muzzle against his fuzzy chest. “Everypony else seems to know who I am but me.” Wriggling against him, I did my best to push myself up to a sitting position on him. Without any effort at all, he reached around me and helped to prop me up. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so ungrateful. I should just enjoy what I still have and not worry about who I am.”

“Nonsense.” Buck snorted and reached up toward my mane. Running a claw through it, he pulled it around from my ear and let it flop down across half of my face again. “You’re still young, Night. Figuring out who you are just comes with maturing into an adult, and that will come in it’s own time.”

“You don’t understand, Buck.” Flaring my wings slightly, I looked back at the messy feathers that hadn't been preened in almost a month. Raising my hoof, I pushed back my mane which hadn’t been washed in just as long. “I don’t know why I like my mane this length. Why my wings are so screwed up…” Turning back to him, I was met with a disheartened frown on it. “Why I even prefer stallions in the first place.”

“You’d rather not?” He asked. Looking up I watched as he scrunched his muzzle up the same way mine probably does when I blurt something out.

“I… I don’t know.” Shaking my head, I sighed. Seriously, why couldn’t I ever seem to sort myself out? Maybe it’s normal to be this way, and I’m just overthinking it? If that was the case, I just wish I knew so I didn’t feel so damn confused all the time.

“If you don’t know, then what does it matter?” Reaching a claw up, he gently used it to hold my muzzle in place as he leaned forward and gave me a soft kiss. “So long as you’re happy, you’ll grow at your own pace. Just… do what feels right, and one day, you’ll understand just why that is.”

I laughed at that. “You sound like my Mom when I asked her about cutie marks.” And from one depressing topic to another. “Seriously, that’s not how it…” Moving so I could take a look at my boring blue flank, I froze. “Wha…?” It seemed it wasn’t so blank any more.

I… had a cutie mark. I got my cutie mark! I… didn’t know what it was? It was sort of hard to tell looking at it in this orientation, but it sort of looked like a protractor from back in school, with a bomb sitting under it.

“Hardcase said that it was some sort of crude bombsight.” Buck sounded more than disappointed when he spoke, though I could tell that he tried to hide it from me. “Something like what they used in the early days of the war.” He forced a smile as I looked back up to him, giving out a short laugh. “Guess Violet was right after all. It might not have been with the Yaks, but you did end up getting your cutie mark from bombing.”

“Your marefriend got it for her superb bombing accuracy.” A stallion with a coat as black as the asphalt roadway, and a shoulder length flowing mane that was the color of ivory stood outside our container. He smiled nervously as he stepped through the door and up to the end of Buck’s bed. He was lean for an earth pony, but by the way he shifted on his hooves, I could see he was well toned. “At least, I hope she did. Otherwise she didn’t mean to miss my cab with that shell.”

“Double Drum?” I asked, watching as Violet poked her head up behind him and nodded. “You’re right. I didn’t want to kill you just because Galina lied to you. I only wanted to keep you from following us.”

He grunted with a smirk. “Well I’ll be damned.” Turning back toward Violet he pointed at me with a short laugh. “She’s as damn humble as you said.” Shaking his head, he rolled his neck to swing his long mane to the side. “I wish I could say I’d been the same after you knocked out my road roller.” With a sigh, he reached up and stiffly rubbed at his neck. “Figures that the one shot I did manage to land…” He paused, looking over at my leg.

“It’s… fine.” I said, lying through my teeth. I was furious that he’d done this to me, but… I couldn’t blame him for it. Anger wasn’t going to do anything for me now. “I’m just glad that nopony else was hurt.” With something between a groan and a sigh, I laid myself back down against Buck’s chest.

“Well,” Double Drum sighed. “I just wanted to tell you personally how much I regret my actions. I’ll be working with your convoy head to arrange some sort of compensation for this incident.”

That perked my ears. “What?” I said, looking up to find a look of confusion mirrored on his face from my words. “I blew up your machine…”

“Archanotech engines can be scavenged, rebuilt, and replaced.” He cut me off with a laugh and a dismissive wave. “And I’d rather lose another ten engines for the Road Roller before I lost my life.” He paused and pointed at me. “On top of that, it’s definitely not worth the wrongful loss of a limb.” Brushing his mane aside again, he smiled. However, this time there was confidence in it. “I’ll do what I can. Probably won’t be much given the short time you’ll be here, but I’ll try to right my wrong. Besides, I can’t have the Road Crew getting a reputation as being untrustworthy to those traveling our roads!”

“You know, if I remember correctly,” Hardcase remarked as he tapped at his chin. “The H.M.S. Mercy was outfit with some pretty high tech prosthesis manufacturing equipment. Able to manufacture some complex cybernetics and the like.” Looking back over to Double Drum, we all watched him cringe. “Is that not an option?”

“Well, not since the Enclave came down.” He sighed, both perking my ears, and making me cringe for just what they’d screwed up for ponies this time. “During their ‘operation cauterize’, a few of them managed to sneak in before their attack and plant some pulse charges around some of our manufacturing equipment. Took half the staff inside hostage as well.” Snorting, he tensed up and looked as if he wanted to smash something to pieces. And I didn’t blame him. Sure, Tail End and the others at Filly Crossing didn’t deserve the attitude, but even I wasn’t having a hard time finding the Enclave as untrustworthy assholes. And that’s how I was feeling before whatever this ‘operation cauterize’ had been.

“But we fought off the main force of them trying to come down,” He continued, “at least until they gave up the attack altogether when the Lightbringer fixed the sky. Still, some of those cybernetics machines they sabotaged are rarer than a ray of sunlight.” He paused, scrunching up his muzzle. “Pardon the outdated phrase. But as it sits, the Docs on board are still trying to get most of what was ruined back up and running. Prosthetics are mostly back up, but cybernetic parts production is still going to take some time.”

“That’s a shame, but I doubt Night here would want another heavy piece of metal strapped on when flying. I’ve even heard of griffons having a hard time flying with some of the older models, and they’re race is particularly good at flying with heavy weight on them.” Buck sighed as he reached over and gave my mane a little ruffle. I blushed brightly at his affection, and smiled up at him. “Still, I want to get him over there to have them check his leg out anyway. Maybe they’ll have something simple that he can use instead?”

“That’s what I was thinking.” Double Drum nodded and waved for me to get up. “Why don’t you all have a look around town for a bit? Destruction Bay may not look like much at first, but there’s plenty of relaxing to be had! While you all do that, I can head over to the H.M.S. Mercy and have a talk with the head of staff, Mrs. Edith, about finding some way to accommodate you with a free prosthetic, even if it’s a simple one.”

“Getting some good grub sounds like a great idea to me. Hopefully they’ve got an open table we could snag at Peddler’s restaurant.” Violet smiled and nodded, looking between the others who all did the same.

However, as I watched them each nodding, it felt like they were all exactly the same movement. Maybe it was because I was still a bit in shock at all this, or maybe it was the familiarity of the situation I was in, but I’d seen this sort of behavior before. The fake-ish smiles, the want to get out and do something to distract me while they work on finding a way to ‘fix’ me. This was just the same as when I’d been told my wings weren’t like everypony else's.

“Does that sound like something you’d want to do?” Buck asked, lowering himself down next to me and giving a hesitant gaze. “I can stay here with you if you’d like, we don’t have to go out right now if you don’t want to leave.”

It really was just the same as back then with my wings. It was a well worded deception, a sneaky usage of ‘we’ and ‘you’. I wasn’t supposed to say no, I was supposed to buy into what they’d hoped would be something to keep me from feeling depressed. To keep me from folding in and shutting out the world.

The thing they didn’t understand was that I wasn’t depressed. There was nothing I could do about my wings back then, and there was nothing I could do about my leg now. Moreover, the thing that couldn’t be more similar from back then, was the fact that I simply didn’t want to go out. Not because I was sad or depressed, but I just didn’t want to go anywhere at all.

“Okay.” I said, smiling and nodding to Buck, who responded with the same bright smile I loved to see on him. “Let’s go.”

As much as I didn’t want to go out, I didn’t want to disappoint anypony either. Back then with my wings and my parents, I regretted buying into their words. I swore that if I ever had to choose again, I’d lock myself away and never come back out. But I wasn’t a colt anymore, and I knew I’d have to leave this room at some point. So it might as well have been now, and it might as well have been with Buck.

Even if I’d hate every moment of my time outside.

Pity.

I just knew it was going to crop up everywhere I looked in this city. Just like back in school at Neighvarro when the other foals learned of my ‘disability’. Hushed talking and snarky giggles behind my back were everywhere in those days. I hated it. I hated knowing that I’d become nothing more than a shared joke, a source of perverse amusement to all of them. It made me sick. But I’d survived it once, I’d survive it again.

However, the ponies milling about in the open air bazaar just inside the city gates on the outskirts of town… didn’t even take notice of us. There were hundreds of ponies here, just within this small section of town. Ponies who’d obviously been drinking, ponies singing songs together as they worked, and ponies quietly packing up their supplies or dealing with customers.

They were all intermixed with the half dozen other races I’d seen everywhere else down in the wasteland, conversing with them without a care. Some of those around here to my surprise even had missing limbs as well, and more of them had visible scarring somewhere on their bodies. The more I looked around, the more I felt my eyes open.

Even just the outskirts of this city looked full of ponies who’d been broken and battered, only to carry on. Happy had been right that my time in the wasteland so far had been easy. The griffon without wings, the unicorn with a shattered horn, and the earth pony with two missing legs. They’d literally been torn apart by the things that had happened in their lives, and yet, they still worked and lived out their days, just as I now would have to. This was the wasteland, but no one here let it get to them. Hell, none of the ponies who looked healthy even cast more than a curious glance at what was probably just another set of outsiders coming through their city.

The gloom I’d expected to feel lifted, and a weight felt like it trickled away off of my back. Even more surprising, I felt a smile grow across my muzzle as I looked around those who populated the ruined city. There was so much hope here, and a strength among its citizens that almost seemed to steady my legs all on it’s own just by looking at them.

“Yeah, it’s not much to look at.” Hardcase smiled, giving me a small nudge on my side. “But it’s more civilization than most of the wasteland has. Destruction Bay, the safest and most welcoming city in the north!” He took in a deep breath of air, seeming to relax a bit as he did. “Well, it isn’t so much that way nowadays, but still, it feels good to be back here again.”

“Enjoy it while we’re here, boys.” Violet smiled as she leaned against Hardcase. However, from how she said it, I was getting the feeling that she was mostly speaking to Buck and I. “But don’t let it fool you, Destruction Bay is probably the largest and nicest settlement you’ll see until we get back home. Enjoy it, but don’t get used to it.”

“Oh?” Buck snorted and put a claw to his muzzle, “I was sure I’d heard somewhere on the Inuvik that Cantercross was a much larger city than this, housing more ponies in the cities ruins than anywhere else this far northwest.”

“Larger, yes.” Hardcase looked about nervously before looking over to violet.

“Nicer,” Violet continued for him with a disgusted look across her muzzle. “Not so much.”

Figuring I’d worry about all that those words implied at a later time, I turned my attention over the city again.

Overall, Destruction Bay wasn’t quite what I’d expected it to be. Along the bowl shaped rise that connected to the forested hills that ran around the entire harbor, sat hundreds of small, simple scrap wooden homes. Most of them looked of fairly solid construction, and showed themselves off with muted, but worn technicolor paints across their patchwork exteriors. Hundreds of ponies wandered along the hills in and around the houses. Foals could be seen playing in hock high wild grass front lawns, their parents were milling about cooking fires, or busy collecting their hung out laundry in the falling evening light.

Of course that was just the outskirts that ringed most of the top of the raised hill that gently sloped down almost a quarter of a mile toward the muddy ocean bay. Lower on the hill, and closer towards the center of the city, there were the various ruined buildings I’d expected to see from after the apocalypse. It looked a lot like how Cannon city was, but if Cannon city were many times larger. The crumbling and mostly overgrown remains of the many buildings here didn’t look charred or burned out. Instead, they looked fractured and broken backwards, as if attack of the 50 foot mare had actually occurred here. But rather than climb to the top of a skyscraper, she pushed over every tall building she could find, resting them all against the hillside.

Even though the destruction was odd, it wasn’t hard to guess that some sort of tidal wave could have caused this. Scattered in, on, and across the various city ruins were the numerous rusting hulks of old navy ships. The old hulks were in various states of decay themselves, but were all mostly intact. This place had apparently once been some sort of official naval port back in the war, which had become fairly obvious as I hobbled along with the others further down toward the bay.

The closer to the bay you looked, the denser the collection of rotting and rusting ship hulls was. The parade of beached ships ended in two overly large and contrasting ships still mostly sitting between a pier that ran quite a ways out into the muddy water of the bay. The one sitting on the southern edge of the bay, resembled the Empirica a bit. Well, if it had been a bit smaller, painted white and green, and had an enormous red cross plastered on it’s side like some of the old medical kits before the war did. The name H.M.S. Mercy still sat across her prow in bold black letters, and the setting sun far off over the open water behind her gave her a glowing halo that simply shouted that she was here to help.

Across from her, on the northern half of the bay however, sat the largest, most military looking boat I’d ever seen. And having seen some of the post war retrofitted Raptors around Neighvarro, that was saying something! The wide, nearly all black metal hull was impressive enough in it’s size alone. Sitting well above most of the ruins along the edge of the concrete seawall it leaned against, the massive ship was as long as two raptors, and nearly as wide as two near its midpoint.

The sturdy and well armored conning tower sat all lit up atop a mountain of smaller decks that held countless old small gun batteries. The conning tower itself rose a hundred feet or so into the air, and I could see plain as day as various ponies moved about the two separate bridges inside the top of the structure. Shrouded behind the impressive conning tower was a silver object of mystery with ponies darting along the deck around it. It sat on a pair of rails that jutted over the edge of the ship, and was definitely out of place among the black steel. I’d seen something similar on one of the luxury airships that flew around Neighvarro city when I was a kid. It was a catapult, for launching a sky vehicle of some sort, though I don’t know why a ship this size needed something like that...

But it was a pair of things that sat in front of the conning tower, as well as a pair behind, that quickly pulled my attention from the catapult. Two sets of impressively large, black turret casemates sat fore and aft of the tower, and had their own intimidating feel to them. A feeling made worse by the fact that each of the steel turrets held matching pairs of immensely big articulating cannons in them. All eight of the massive guns on the enormous wartime ship were turned and pointed up toward the front of town where we were. I won’t lie, it made me more than a bit wary of sticking around up here while we were staring down the eight massive gun barrels.

Moving my gaze to focus on things other than the giant artillery pieces, I quickly found myself staring at the various shipwrecks around the rubble of the city itself. They had pretty much all been repurposed into trade huts for weary travelers, bars and restaurants, or workshops for sorting through various scraps. One of the ones closer to where we were standing had even been converted into a full garage that looked to be solely devoted to keeping a few of the Cordite tank mercs and their rides housed.

In fact, one of the varied old tanks in particular caught my eye. Parked next to what happened to be a small, grey, lightly armored tank with two small machine guns in its turret, was the odd looking BT-42 we’d seen up at Filly Crossing. Climbing out from the top of it, was a ghoul stallion in well kept khaki military garb. He wore his mane... well, what was left of it, underneath an old burgundy beret. The waxed mustache on the end of his muzzle was still impeccably full bodied for as degraded as his body was, and was split around a softly glowing wooden pipe that he puffed on.

“Sure does seem fairly peaceful for having been recently attacked.” Buck spoke up, breaking what had been an overtly awkward silence. “Not that it’s a bad thing.”

“Yeah,” Hardcase nodded, pressing himself up against Violet as the two walked together. He eyed over down into the large black ship in the bay. “I’m actually surprised to hear that the Enclave attacked here at all. The H.M.S. Fairy Flight is normally a big enough reason to keep anypony from starting a fight around here, but I guess it doesn’t mean there aren’t some colossal idiots out in the wasteland.”

“Hun?” Violet sighed and wrapped her wing tightly around Hardcase, “Fairy Flight is a Fairweather class dreadnaught. She was meant for bombarding fortified targets 14 miles away, not shooting pegasi out of the sky. Overkill like those fifteen inch guns only works when you can actually hit something with them.”

“Actually,” A mare from behind us spoke up in annoyance. “You’d be surprised at how well it performed.” Spinning around, I nearly ran nose first into a set of sleek, black Enclave power armor. Looking up, I tried to backpedal, but without four legs, I simply fell backwards right into Buck. As I did, my eyes were locked in a horrified stare on the mare. She was already more than intimidating enough in her armor, but looked like she was missing half of her face just to boot. Well, at least the entire right side of her head was bare bone. From jawline to mane line, it was bone, scratched, chipped, and charred mostly black. Her empty right eye socket still had some skin and muscle around it, while the rest of her head had knotted skin at the edges, looking dull and dead.

“They put up more of a fight than we were expecting. Her secondary guns gave us a run for our bits, and I respected their courage and tenacity.” The mare turned her one amber eye on Violet with a menacing scowl. “Something you Dashite traitors wouldn’t know.”

“At least I wasn’t murdering innocent foals and hiding behind a half baked general's orders as an excuse.” Violet snorted back. Her retort was almost as sharp as the dropping of the crate of metal scrap from the armored mare’s back. “Oh, what’s that? You can’t possibly tell me that offends you. No, you Enclave bitches have no morals left to offend.”

“Ladies.” Buck growled, “Let’s not escalate this.” I quickly found myself scooted aside by Buck’s enormous paw as he stepped up toward the two who were now locked in a death-stare.

“Hah, that’s rich coming from a Dashite.” The mare laughed. “You wouldn’t understand what I did.” She lifted her armored hoof as the scorpion like tail on the rear of her armor curled forward. She brought both to her neck, and pressed them against her flesh. “I did murder innocent ponies. I did what I was told to, without thought or hesitation just like I was trained for.” A crooked smile split the mare’s muzzle as she started to laugh.

“But they don’t train you how to feel afterwards. They don’t prepare you for how you can’t forget what you did.” Pulling the bladed scorpion tail away from her neck, just the tip of it dripped a small bit of blood off of it. Using her hoof, she traced it around the grievous wound on her head. “We were monsters for listening to the orders of a corrupt and foolhardy government, I can see that now. We deserved everything that was brought against us, and I nearly paid for it with my life.”

Snapping her hoof out toward Violet, Buck’s claws were nearly as fast. Whether it had been an intent to strike her, or just an accusational expression, the mare had underestimated Buck’s speed. To her credit, she didn’t even flinch as he wrapped his paw around her leg and stopped it dead. And to my surprise, Buck simply held her leg there, not letting her extend the last few inches toward Violet’s chest. I knew he was strong, but I never thought he could hold back the strength of power armor...

To this, the mare only laughed. “That’s good. Your friends are loyal to you, for now.” Leaning forward, her armor creaked as she put more weight on the leg Buck held. He grunted, straining to hold the limb in place. “And while that’s admirable, they’ll learn soon enough that traitorous cunts like you don’t stand for anything other than yourselves. All it’s going to take is the right offer, and then they’re nothing but bodies in the way of your own selfish goals. Isn’t that right?” The words made Violet take a step back, and Hardcase was immediately there to reach out and grab ahold of her. With a sharp tug, the mare pulled her leg out from Buck’s grasp and stepped back as well.

“This town offered us sanctuary, medical treatment for our wounded, even though we’d been the enemy only hours before hoof. They saved my pathetic and wretched life. Something that the Enclave was willing to just throw away, even after everything I did for those cowards in charge.” The mare smiled, and her nearly skeletal grin sent a shiver down my spine. “I may have to work the rest of my life to make up for what I did to these ponies, but I’ll never deny why I did it. I know what I’m loyal to, and I’m willing to fight for what I believe is the right thing.” Turning around, she picked up her crate of metal bits with an ease only power armor afforded her. Turning back, she cast an amber eyed glance back over to Violet only for a moment. “Can you say the same, Dashite?”

As she turned and walked away from us, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d been lucky to have come down when I did. I can’t quite imagine how it must be for the tens of thousands of other pegasi out there. Having to live with what they’d done to the ponies of the wastelands, and all the hatred that came with it. Still, while the ponies of Filly Crossing hadn’t been accepting, they’d been far from violent. Even Destruction Bay seemed incredibly forgiving for what had supposedly happened.

And yet, that mare exemplified the worst of both our worlds. She hated the Enclave government for what it made her do. But, she still couldn’t see that she was the same as Violet now. She was too lost in the hatred all of us pegasi are taught to have for the Dashites, and I’m glad I learned about how much of a lie that all had been. Maybe I was an idiot in saying what I did to Violet when I met her, but I’d been lied to about so much that I gave her a chance.

This mare might be too set in her ways to change, but in the end, it didn’t matter to me. I had my own morals I stuck to. I’d proven it with Delilah, and from how Violet reacted to the mare’s harsh words? I couldn’t help but think that maybe some small part of Violet actually believed in what the mare was saying at least a little bit. However, I was pretty sure that I knew Violet well enough to say that she didn’t need to doubt herself.

“Fuck her.” I grunted, turning to Violet. “Fuck the Enclave.”

“Yeah,” Just like that, the grimace she wore faded away as she gave off a haughty laugh. “Fuck that bitch.” Leaning her head against a relieved looking Hardcase, she sighed. “Shit, I forgot my bits bag back in our room.” Looking over to Hardcase, she smiled to him before glancing over to Buck and I as well. “Go on ahead, I’ll be right back.” Flapping her wings, she took off back over the wall toward where the Convoy was parked.

I nodded, turning towards Buck, only to find him still standing and watching as the power armored mare walked into the crowd of ponies packing up sections of the Bazaar. He seemed tense, and his ears were perked as if he were waiting for something.

“Buck...?” I asked as I hobbled a few steps toward him. Reaching out, the moment my hoof touched him, he flinched and spun around to me with wide eyes.

“What...?” He asked nervously. “Oh, right. Ready to go?” He forced a smile that made me feel like he wanted to just drop whatever was going on. But I wasn’t going to do that.

“Are… you okay?” I wasn’t sure what had him so on edge, but I hoped he’d tell me.

“Yeah, just...” Looking back over his shoulder, he paused. “Thought I saw Salt.”

“Oh…” That was less surprising than it probably should have been to me. I’d heard Buck and Hardcase talking, but I just sort of forgot when the whole missing leg issue came up.

“You guys coming?” Hardcase called out to us already a ways ahead down the muddy road.

“Yeah, just go on ahead, we’ll catch up.” I said, smiling as I hadn’t the faintest idea of where he was going, or how to find him. However, that wasn’t important right now. Turning back to Buck, I found that he’d gone back to looking in the direction of the Bazaar. “Maybe we should just leave him alone?” I said as I hobbled up beside him and wrapped my hooves around his waist. Holding him for a few moments, I felt as the tension that he had started to wear down, falling away with me at his side. “I just want to spend some time with you for now, and try to get my mind off of recent events.”

“Of course.” Buck replied softly. Reaching around my side, he scooped me up with his paw and curled me around against his warm chest. If it weren’t for the fact that it was probably the most comfortable place for me to be right now, I’d have insisted on hobbling. But from how uneasy he’d just looked, I knew he needed me right here with him.

“Hey!” The squeaky squawk of Hispano chimed in from above us. With a fluttering of her wings, she swooped down around us. “Woke up from my nap and found you’d all decided to leave without me!” She smiled as she slowed her flight, putting herself into a slow orbit around Buck and I. Lifting her goggles up over her flight cap as she circled around, her eyes were locked on me. In them, I could see the pity that I’d expected to see from the rest of the city. “How you holding up, Dum Dum?”

“I’m fine.” I lied. While I wasn’t going to cry anymore over my leg, it was still something I didn’t have to be happy learning to live with. “We’re all going to get something to eat,” I said, pointing in the vague direction downtown where Hardcase had walked off to. “You can join us if you’d like.”

“I would…” Hispano sighed as she slowed her orbit around Buck even more. It was odd. She’d been fine the last few days, as energetic and bubbly about things as ever. Now though, you’d think we’d stepped right out of the Diner in Carmacks all over again. Rubbing at her neck plumage, she nervously pointed across the city. “I... need to go find my dad. He should be around here somewhere.” She shrugged as she looked around before fluttering her wings to bring her to a hover in front of us. Her beak split into a nervous smile as she fidgeted uneasily. “But I’ll come find you afterwards, i-if that’s okay with you that is. Alright, best friend?” It wasn’t the same fake nod that I’d gotten from the others on Bertha, but something that felt genuine this time. Still, she was trying to avoid me for some reason, and I wish I knew why…

Buck huffed. “Well, after we eat, I was planning on taking Night onto the Mercy to have them look over his leg.” Turning my attention to him, I could feel as he tensed up a bit as he looked over her. Looking back to Hispano, she did everything to avoid his gaze, which made a realization hit me like a ton of bricks. “You can find us there if you wish.” Buck said as he held me tighter than he’d been before. Of course that was why! She didn’t want to hang around with the one I’d chosen over her.

Well, tough luck.

“Hispano?” I spoke up, pulling her nervous look back to me. “You’re dad can wait. You’re coming with us so my friends can meet you.” I’d felt bad enough for what happened at Carmacks, and I really did want to at least try to be friends with her.

She cringed at that. “Night… you know that’s not such a good idea.” Rubbing at her neck plumage she pointed up to the sky. “I really think I should be going.” Turning, she flapped hard.

“Hispano!” I grunted, making her freeze up. “If we’re really going to be the ‘best of friends’, you should get to know the ones I’m traveling with, and they should get to know you.” Who knows, maybe if they all got to know each other, she’d reconsider joining us, even if that went against what her father wanted. “I know I disappointed you with what I said in Carmacks. I know how much it hurt you.” Buck froze up as he held me, and I could see as Hispano nearly deflated at those words. “But I meant what I said, I want to get to know you better first.” And there I go again, hinting at the promise of something I can’t give.

“You’re an idiot, Dum Dum.” She sighed, slowly sinking through the air. Slowly, she spun around, revealing a wide grin across her beak. “But I’ll join you on two conditions.” She pointed her talon back up to the evening skies. “The first is that I’m going to find my father. Second…” She shifted her tallion back toward the exit. “You wear that dress you bought for our date again.”

I cringed as she said that, and similarly felt Buck tense up around me. I wish she hadn’t said that…

“Deal.” I said, nodding nervously to her. “I’ll have to get it from the Hauler, but I’ll wear it for you.” Hearing that, she squeed before hammering her wings at the air and taking off like a bolt into the sky.

“Such a peculiar young griffon.” Buck remarked, watching as she curved around through the air, and disappeared over one of the ruined buildings nearby. “You’ll have to tell me how you met her sometime.” Looking down at me with a cocked eyebrow, he gave me an uneasy glance. “And just what she meant by ‘date’.”

“Yeah, about that…” I whined, pressing myself against him tighter. Okay, damage control begins now. “So, I may have run into Hispano back on the Empirica where she ended up saving my life from some angry stallions. As payment, she wanted a date with me, alright?” I’d never wanted him to find out, and my heart ached as I watched as Buck deadpanned with a sigh. “Look, she’s got a good heart. But… along with that, comes an interest in me.” As much as I hadn’t wanted him to ever find out, he knew now, and I had to trust that he’d be understanding with me.

Straightening up, he pulled me securely against his chest before he turned back toward the entrance of town. “And you have an interest in her?” He asked, trying to hide the wavering annoyance in his voice. It wasn’t that I’d never expected it from him, being so protective of me so far, but… I think he was actually jealous of Hispano having my attention like that. Between Salt and Hispano, no wonder he’d felt like he’d gotten tense.

“No.” I sighed, rubbing at him with my forehoof. The more blunt I put this, the more I hoped he’d understand my position. “I only agreed to the date in Carmacks in lieu of having any other payment to give her for saving my life. However, I told her that night that I didn’t have an interest in a relationship like that. And while she’s seemed fine when she left, I know she took it pretty hard.” Looking up at Buck, I could see him relax slightly at that. “Please, just give her a chance. I just want us all to get along together.”

“I understand, Night.” Buck nodded. Then he stopped walking. Without any explanation, he just stood there staring up at the sky. I was about to ask what was wrong when he gave out a soft whine. “And while I’m relieved to know all this, I wanted to come clean with you about a few things.” He began, “First, I already knew all that.”

“You… knew?” My mind went blank as he just stood there. How… how could he have known!?

“She came down and explained it after I did my best with your leg.” He spoke flatly, not shifting his thousand yard stare one iota from where it was. “She might be excitable, emotional, and a bit... annoying, but she cares about you, Night. It’s not hard to miss that. She explained that she was your friend, and while the others did what they could to keep her away, even at gunpoint she wouldn’t leave.”

“Then why would you ask me about her if you already knew?” This all felt off to me, and there was a growing pit in my stomach that this was leading somewhere I didn’t like.

“She was a wreck after seeing you like that, Night.” Looking down, his gaze felt cold and lonely. “I’m not going to lie in saying that I’ve been overprotective of you because of my feelings, but seeing her like that shook me up.” Sharply, his focus returned, and with it came a look of regret and sorrow that I’d hoped never to see across his face. “While I care about you more than anything, Night... seeing you almost die like that? While I looked calm to the others, it scared the hell out of me. Hispano looked exactly how I felt, but I couldn’t show it to any of them. As their doctor, I can’t show how something like that affects me.”

“But, i'm fine! You patched me right up!” Wiggling my stump against him, I nervously laughed as all sorts of red flags went up in my head. Oh goddesses, please don't have him say he doesn't want to be with me. Why does everything always go so wrong so fast? “You saved me again, Buck. I’m still here because you keep saving me.”

“I know, but…” He paused, giving my mind ample time to run circles around me with just what he was going to say. Here it comes. Where he says he doesn't want to be with me anymore… “It's going to sound so selfish, but... who would save me if that were to happen?” He let out a sad laugh that made my mind lock up. “I don’t ever want you to feel the way I felt, Night.”

“Wha…?” I… I didn’t know how he could even think something like that could even happen. “Buck, it’s not going to happen to you. You’re a Snow Dog! You’re big, and tough, and radiation doesn’t even bother you!”

“It hardly means I'm invincible.” Shaking his head, he looked forward again the dozen feet or so to the city gate. “I've been giving it some thought, and while I was waiting for a good time to talk to you about it, I think now is the time to bring it up.” He lowered his gaze to me before shifting on his paws. “Hearing Hispano talk that way, right after your leg… it reminded me of how fragile life is. How important family is.” Raising a paw, he ran it down his muzzle slowly with a grunt. “And as you know, my family and the Inuvik are going to be down in Seaddle even before we get down there.”

“You want to go back to them, don't you?” This wasn’t him simply leaving me, this was objectively worse than that. “I can't just leave Delilah, you know. If you leave, I won't be able to follow.” It’s not that I didn’t understand his hesitation to be out here after all that’s happened so far. Hell, I’d go with him in a moment’s notice if I hadn’t already agreed to stick with Delilah and the crew.

“I think you misunderstand.” Buck said, reaching down and cupping under my chin. “I don't want to leave. Not this convoy, and especially not you, Night.” He smiled, making me blush and feel a bit embarrassed to have assumed that. “Being around all this violence has only served to remind me of how short life could be for either of us. What regrets might I have were I to perish today? Tomorrow? Where would that leave my family?”

“I don't understand…” Shaking my head, I wasn’t sure what he was getting at. “You don't want to leave, but... what?”

Blushing, he covered his face again. “Like my radiation mutation, most Snow Dogs aren't fortunate enough to be born with the ability to procreate. There are currently twenty eight female snow dogs on the Inuvik who aren’t sterile, as opposed to only fourteen males. My mother and father are two of those, and admittedly, I am one as well.” With a sigh, he shook his head softly. “It was my duty to keep our family line going before I left. It still is my duty to uphold.”

“But... you only like males, right?” While he’d never expressly told me this, I sort of assumed it with his only experiences being Saxon and I. Though, I never did ask if there was anyone else…

“Mostly, yes that’s true.” He looked uneasy at the question, and pulled me up against his furry chest. “But it's not about love, or attraction. It's about my family’s survival, and about a legacy I can leave behind with them. If anything else, before I say goodbye to those on the Inuvik for the foreseeable future, I'd like permission to find someone to have pups with.”

“Permission...?” I paused, thinking about the absurdity of that. Laughing, I felt Buck tense up again around me. To help relieve it a bit, I nuzzled against his side. “Oh, I can't tell you what to do, Buck. You're your own dog. If that's what will make you happy, I won't stand in your way.”

“Oh, thank you!” Buck gasped, grabbing around me tightly and pulling me up against his neck. He sniffled, and I could feel as his warm tears rolled down onto my fur. “I was so scared that you'd be jealous like I’ve been, or even downright hate me for wanting to do it.”

As much as I wanted to be jealous and keep Buck all to myself, I couldn’t really refuse a request like that. Maybe it was all the propaganda and rules of the Enclave, but when you were given the okay to have a foal up there, you never said no. Who was I to deny Buck that happiness, especially if he was willing to stay with me afterwards?

“I... I love you, Buck.” That word effortlessly slipped out of my muzzle. I’d been hesitant to use it before, but really? I've never loved someone more than I do him. “I just want you to be happy.” Carefully, I wrapped my hooves around him and squeezed tightly, feeling him relax under me. “But, I do have one question. How long will you be gone for?” I could excuse him wanting to have pups, and I was more than willing to wait for him to return to me. But I wanted to know just how long that would be.

“No more than a few days.” He smiled, reaching up and wiping his tears away as I froze up. A few days!? He must have seen my surprise, because he laughed softly before rubbing along my side with his paw. “With litters so large, and sterility so rampant, there are more than enough willing dogs on board to adopt a pup or two. And I’m sure my family would be willing to help care for them all until such time as they are given new homes.”

“So… you wouldn’t even get to see them?” It was an odd question to ask. I’d never really put any thought into foals, but if I were to have one with a mare, I’m not sure I could ever just leave it with her forever.

“Well, I’m sure once we get settled down in Brahman Beach after this whole trip is all over, we could make the trip back up to Seaddle to see them at some point.” He shrugged, looking down at me and distracting me with his kind blue eyes and soft smile again. “But the thing I wanted was only to do my part to give my family a future...” Pausing, his ears perked as something in his eyes sparked. “I know it’s not a pleasant subject for you to be reminded of your family, but have you ever thought about it?”

“What?” Okay, I know he’d said he wasn’t psychic, but again with him basically knowing what I was thinking. “N-no.” I grunted, limply hanging off of him. Reaching up, I wrapped my fetlock against my mother's dog tags. “Well... not until now.” I don’t know if I could have a foal with some random pony. What good is it to leave a ‘legacy’ behind when it’s not with somepony you care for? Besides, my parents knew I liked stallions, they would have known I wouldn’t have given them foals...

“Well I think you should put some thought into it.” He stated, standing us up stiffly and finally beginning to walk back toward the large metal gate that led outside the city. “I know you’re like me, and that you may not have too much interest in it right now. But for what it’s worth, I’ll be behind you one hundred percent of the way if you ever find a mare you want to have a foal with.”

I know that it may not have been something I felt like I’d ever take him up on, I still appreciated him saying it was alright with him. Keeping my hooves wrapped around him tightly, I sighed and pressed myself into his warmth. While everything about my relationship with him had moved fast, I loved Buck. He was the one I would do anything for down here, and I know he was the exact same way with me.

“Or you know,” Giving a chuckle as the large gate opened, Buck gave me a pat on the back. “Maybe a griffon, seeing as they are compatible...”

“Not in a million years.” I gave a half grunt, half giggle at the absurdity of that. In fact, an idea that made me giggle even more forced it’s way into my mind. “I’d sooner give up on going south with Delilah and the others and stay here forever before agreeing to anything like that.”

And as the wasteland had been endeavoring to do the last few weeks, it proved once again that irony was the greatest force in the universe.

There was a nearly deafening crack that shook the air from behind me as the gate to the city opened. A bright orange fireball rose up from the side of Bertha as her massive front right tire was engulfed in flames. I spun around from Buck’s chest just in time to watch as the huge front tire gave out a heavy groan before tipping over and flopping down in the mud with a splash. The cracked and blackened axle where the tire had once been attached now sat above a growing pyre of burning rubber.

Ponies from all over the gate, and even some from the market rushed out at the noise. Some of them ran out with buckets of water, running over to douse the bright flames that licked at the fallen tire. But Buck and I stood there in shock, not sure what to make of just what had happened. But I’m sure we were both thinking the exact same thing. That… was it then. We were stuck here.

No.

I was sure that Delilah would be able to fix this. She’d always had a contingency plan, and this time would surely be no different. Still, my mind jumped between the only two who could have done this. Either Galina had come and waited for the right moment, or Hispano’s dad had set all this up. Really, while this was going to be a setback for us, I found myself remarkably not worried about it. Delilah would get this all sorted out. We’d get back on the road before Solomon got here, and that would be that!

Then again, none of that worry really mattered when I had the one I loved standing here with me. There could have been another megaspell apocalypse and so long as Buck was with me, I couldn’t have cared. Slowly, Buck reached up and pressed his paw against me, holding me tight. Reaching down, I took his paw in my hooves and held tight as well.

Focusing myself, I closed my eyes and relaxed against him, trying to imagine the quiet and peaceful life we would have when this trip was over, and we’d finally made it down to Brahman Beach with all of our friends. And as much as I didn’t want to be with her, or with how irony had just made things worse by joking about her, that vision of our future included Hispano. Just all of us, living happy lives together away from the horrors of Solomon and the northern wastelands.

That time couldn’t come soon enough.

Author's Notes:

First of all, I'd like to thank TheFurryRailFan for his help in going over this chapter. It's invaluable to have another set of eyes look over things, and it's that much better when someone as dedicated as him lends a helping hoof! So thanks, buddy! It means a lot to me!

Also, thanks to Kkat for allowing us all to use the wonderful Fo:E setting, and for the amazing story that started this all!