You know what you're getting fucking tired of? Vomit. Like, for real. The last few days or so have been a fucking nightmare for you. Fluttershy's fetish guesses seem to just continually include some sort of vomiting.

But, you know what? Not today. You aren't gonna deal with her sorta bullshit. That why you find yourself in Sugarcube Corner today, sipping coffee, because you can't get a good night's sleep to save your life.

Pinkie Pie strolls past your seat and makes idle conversation in the otherwise empty bakery.

"So, what's up, Anon?" she says. "I didn't get the chance to see you yesterday. Did something stop you from your normal daily visit?" she asks.

You sigh to yourself, stirring coffee.

"Oh, you know. This and that. I was Over Watching somepony's house for the day, and I guess time just got away from me. I should be back on track. I think," you say.

Pinkie Pie stares at you blankly.

"You know, you can just be blunt and tell them that you were playing-"

"Video games don't exist here, Pinkie Pie."

Pinkie furrows her brow at you.

"Uh, Yeah huh they do. The other day I was watching Button-"

"Button doesn't exist, Pinkie Pie."

"Of course he exists," she says, becoming frustrated. "I just saw him yesterday."

You wave a hand in front of the mare's face.

"Button Mash doesn't exist."

Pinkie Pie looks at you blankly.

"Has anypony ever told you that you're off you're rocker, Anon?"

You smile and lean back in your booth.

"Coming from you, Pinkie Pie. That's a compliment."

Pinkie smiles, waving a hoof.

"Sure thing, Anon. Just lemme know if we go back to your marefriend or something. That was a way better arc."

Pinkie Pie trots away as you turn towards her.

"Wait. Marefriend? What? I don't have a-"

"Hi, Anon!" Fluttershy says happily.

Marefriend. Fucking great.

"Hi, Fluttershy, you say, turning to her.

Then, you immediately scoot your chair back. This pony is about to blow! Her entire body seems to be engorged, especially her stomach. Little streams of white begin to run down her nose and from the corners of her eyes.

"I-Is..." she chokes out, clearly trying to keep her muscles tightened. "Cum inflation your fetish?"

"JESUS CHRIST!" you yell, running from your seat to behind the bakery counter. "PINKIE! TAKE COVER!"

Pinkie leaps from behind the kitchen, wearing a WW2-esque Military helmet and war paint.

"DUCK AND COVER," Pinkie yells. "ANON! DETONATE THAT BOMB!"

You peek your head over the counter to Fluttershy, who's staring at the two of you, completely baffled.

"U-uhm..." Fluttershy stutters to yourself as you scream.

"NO! IT'S NOT MY FETISH!"

"O-oh. O-okay," Fluttershy replies, then relaxes.

You duck behind the counter as you hear a quiet ringing. Then, all hell breaks loose. Cum shoots out from almost every free orifice that Fluttershy has and projects itself all over Sugarcube Corner, giving all of the cakes, muffins and cookies and extra dose of stallion icing.

"IT'S GOING EVERYWHERE?!" Pinkie Pie screams.

You hear the ring of the welcome bell. A lime green mare with a rock cutie mark happily hops into the store but is pushed back outside from the torrent of cum. After a few minutes, Fluttershy collapses on the ground, her throat sore and cum vomit spree ended. You rise from your battlements to view the carnage of war.

An old, cranky stallion sits in the corner, still eating his cum covered eggs. Fertilized eggs? Nah, bad joke. Cut that. Cut this paragraph from your memory.

You tiptoe through the solid inch of cum on the ground and make your way to the front door. Pinkie Pie rises to her hooves and looks between you and Fluttershy.

"Oh, come on! Isn't somepony gonna help clean this up?

You look back to the pink mare as you shrug.

"I dunno. You're Pinkie Pie. Can't you do a montage or something and just... immediately clean this up?"

The pink mare goes blank in surprise.

"Huh, why don't I think of things like that more often."

With a shrug, you open the front door and step out of the bakery, leaving your cum covered stalker behind.

Author's Notes:

I missed a day. I'm trash.