The warm water of the shower drips against your face and runs down your body. It's strange how a warm liquid running down your body can be almost... theraputic. The water doesn't strike you with much force, so it isn't quite a massage. It's warm, but not much warmer than if you wore a sweatshirt, which arguably would envelop you into a tight embrace. Heck, without scrubbing, the water doesn't even wash away all of the sweat, dirt, and toxins that build up on the outside of your body.

But, the water feels good. Soothing. Releving, in fact. In this shower, you can let the issues of your mind fall away for just a moment. Once the water is gone, the tension will be back. But, for now, this moment is worth relishing. Right now, you know that everything will be all right. The water brings peace. Calm.

Then you hear three loud knocks from your door downstairs.

And now that tightness in your upper back returns.

"LA LA LA. I CAN'T HEAR YOOOOUUUUU," you sing loudly to the shower.

But who are you kidding? The knocking continues. You can't get away from your problems, just ease them off your mind for a moment. The sooner you get done with what's stressing you out, the sooner you can step forward to the next moment of relaxation.

You kill the water, throw on a robe, throw on a pair of slippers, then head downstairs.

You toss open the door, and on the other side is that pony who never fails to make your day more exotic. Erotic? No. Definately not. That's not the word.

"What? What the fuck do you want?"

"H-hi, Anon. Uhm. I-I have a strange one today.... s-so. Could you be just a little patient with me?" she asks, her face hiding behind her mane and tail hanging low.

"No."

"Pleease?" she begs, her cheeks turning pink.

"Fine."

"U-uhm. S-so. Today's guess is Crushing so..."

And then your gut drops. You know what crushing is. It's in your folder of "Things I won't admit I'd fapped to and then hated myself for." What the fuck is she going to do? Crush a squirrel under her hooves? Push you down and crush your jewels?!

You take a step back as Fluttershy takes a deep breath.

"Anon, I have a crush on you."

Silence.

"Wait, what?"

"There, I did it," she says, smiling to herself. "I finally expressed my feelings."

In that moment, you're taken off guard. This tiny pony in front of you put herself out there and expressed her feelings for you. This... this wasn't a guess at all. She is actually trying to start some sort of genuine romance.

She's not a bad pony. Hell, you might even call her kind. Isn't that worth at least one date?

However, that's not really 'you' is it?

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY," you shout at her.

"W-what?"

"GROSS. YOUR FEELINGS ARE GROSS."

"Oh shoot!"

As Fluttershy pouts, she stomps a hoof, idly crushing a nearby ant. For some reason, your pants seem to feel strangely tight. Oh god damnit. Of course that did something for you. Fucking thanks, body.

Fluttershy's face pales in horror. She picks up the ant in her hooves, tears welling in her eyes.

"O-oh. Oh no! Poor Mr. Ant! It's okay! I can help you!"

And with that, her wings unfurl and she flutters off without saying goodbye. You slam the door and walk inside.

"Well, I guess that happened. Time to go beat off to weird porn again."

And so, you went and beat off. It was pretty great until the end, then you wondered what happened to make you so fucked up.