It’s another lonely night in Equestria. You eye your telephone carefully, unsure if this is really worth it. Sure, it's hard to find someone special in Equestria... but this... might actually be unhealthy.

You sigh.

"Fuck it."

You pick up the phone. All you have to do is imagine there is a human on the other line. That’s all you have to do.

You dial the number Big Mac told you about and put the phone up to your ear. The phone begins to ring.

”If you would like to talk to hot, sexy fillies near you, please put in your credit card number now.”

You sigh at the word filly. After putting in your number, you put the phone back up to your ear.

”Just one moment.”

The phone rings, until you hear the other side pickup.

”Mmm… Hey there big boy… I heard you were feeling a little lonely tonight.”

Well, off to a good start.

"Yeah… a little." you mutter into the phone.

”Well mama is going to make it alll better. Mmm. You sound so sexy. Tell me your name big boy.”

Uhh…. Shit.

"My name is Mous."

”Ohh. Mous… Well. My name is Shy… and I’m going to make you feel amazing.”

>Wait.

"Shy? As in…. Fluttershy?"

The line goes quiet.

”Mous? A-As in Anonymous?”

You go quiet. Fuck it.

"My place. Five minutes."

”I’ll be right there.”

You spend the next 5 minutes pulling on your best clothes, making your bed and spraying on as much deodorant as possible. A knock on the door grabs your attention.

Were you really going to do this?

Stumble downstairs and stop dead in front of the door. You take a deep breath. You need this, Anon. You've been pent up for months.

You open the door. Fluttershy peers up at you, wearing a lovely lime green dress. She put way more effort into her appearance than you did, it seems. The pair of you eye each other up for a second.

Then the pegasus launches herself forward and locks her lips against yours. You hold her up to your body tightly, a hand clutching her butt. You use your free hand to slam the door shut.

The two of you make your way upstairs, lips locked and adrenaline pumping. You nearly fucked her right there on the steps.

You kick open your bedroom door and run over to your bed, your partner breaking contact for a second to muss up her mane and get under the covers. Rip off your shirt, buttons flying everywhere. Your pants soon follow before you join your ‘date’ in your bed.

"Fucking hell."

Fluttershy gazes into the distance, drooling.

"That was exactly what I needed."

She doesn't reply.

"You alright, Flutters?"

”S-stallions…Usually... Last 20 seconds… In bed…”

Looks like you broke her. Fuck yeah, humanity.