Dear Pinkie Pie,

Um, so do you care to explain why the fuck you teamed up with Twilight for Trivia night?

Sincerely,
Rainbow Dash and Applejack

Dear Rainbow and AJ,

If you take the time to think about it, you'll realize it's all part of the plan. I already slipped Granny a few bits to rig the random drawing, guaranteeing that I'd get paired with her, and then all I have to do is suck the entire time.

We can't lose.

Sincerely,
Pinkie

Dear Pinkie,

I thought losing was the whole point of this idea.

-Rainbow and AJ

Dear Rainbow and AJ,

That's what I meant. By performing so badly so Twilight can't win, we can't lose.

...Yeah, when I say it like that, I need a drink.

-Pinkie

Dear Sunburst,

Just what the hell are you doing here? You aren't taking advantage of this spare time to fuck Starlight?

Sincerely,
Twilight

To: Twilight

That's exactly what I said!

-Starlight

And a 21-month hiatus (for actual episode parodies) ends out of the freaking blue.

Thanks for reading after all this time. Let's see if I can maybe finally finish this thing.