Additional contributions by MixMassBasher.

Dear Hasbro,

Why did you give me a diet-tier fake parent?! I want to know my real dragon parentage!

Pissed off,
Spike

Dear Spike,

Are you sure you really want to get canon parents?

Sincerely,
Rainbow, Sunburst and Starlight

To Headmistress Twilight,

Since I've helped your assistant learn how to fly properly, can I get some extra credit in my friendship assignments?

Your student,
Smolder

To Smolder,

Let me think...

No.

Signed,
Headmistress Twilight

Dear Sludge,

Mooching off of others? I like your style. Let's hang out, dude.

Impressed,
Zephyr Breeze

Dear Ember,

Could you command a certain green and pudgy dragon to strangle himself to death?

Your friend,
Spike

Dear Spike,

No, but I can make him walk instead of fly, maybe the fatass can lose a few pounds that way.

Sincerely,
Ember

Dear Sludge,

Joor Zah Frul

Sincerely,
Ember

Dear Headmistress Twilight,

So there was somecreature in the castle that you actually didn't want to go down on?

Maybe we should have kept him around.

Sincerely,
Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Starlight