The Gift of the Maud Pie
by milesprower06
Additional Contributions by MixMassBasher

Dear Pinkie Pie,

So let me get this straight. You'd rather trade your signature party cannon for a rock pouch instead of, oh, I don't know, asking a close and dear friend to make it for you? Give your sister's gift a nice personal touch? No? Fine.

Bitch.

-Rarity

Dear Pinkie Pie,

You are hereby ordered to appear in court, charged with illegal firearms trading. You gave an unregistered Class 3 Artillery Cannon to a stallion without a firearms license.

Officer Judy Trots

Ms. Trots,

I'm sorry, but you'll never take me alive. I knew the day would come when Celestia would try and come for our cannons. The only way you'll get this is by prying it from my cold dead hooves.

-Pinkamena Pie

Dear Rarity,

You had better hire me to be in charge of your new shop!

Your pen pal,
Coco Pommel

"Pinkie?"

'Yes Rarity?"

"You went through all this trouble to get Maud that present but couldn't you just have given her Tom?"

"...Mother Fu—"