Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06

Made In Manehattan

Dear Rarity,

Alright, listen up, you fashionista fuckwad.

Last I checked, you're a unicorn, and you deal with clothes professionally every single day.

So why the hell would you ever think I would want some old hat from a street vendor over my pa's family heirloom? Ever think of that before you just up and threw it away? Ever think you could just work a little of that fucking unicorn magic and fix it instead?

Say, you remember how much farmwork you did to impress Trenderhoof last year? Well, I hope you enjoyed it. You're gonna be quite busy working off that hat. In the orchards and in my bed.

Pucker up, buttercup.

Sincerely,
Applejack

Author's Notes:

Quick edit for a perfect response from a reader: