Apple and Chip laid side by side on Apple's bed; each lost in their own thoughts and emotions. Both were panting, sweaty messes. Chip could hardly believe he had actually just done IT. The thing men begged, barrowed, lied, stole, and killed for. The thing that men bragged about having long before they actually had. The thing that Chip had always been 90% he would never get to experience unless there was an exchange of cash.

Apple, on the other hand, couldn't believe that Chip had actually been good at it. For males, a little friction and all was right with the world. That and coupled with the fact they couldn't get pregnant, and not only weren't they stigmatized for having it, but actually lionized, no wonder it was all systems go for them all the time. For females of any age, sex was a labyrinth of mixed social messages and politics, weird body reactions, emotional hang-ups, and ( at least the first few times) pain, both physical and emotional.

She had heard the stories from other girls about what their first times had been like and without exception almost all of them were bad. Really bad. In a lot of those cases it was clear the boy in question didn't care about anything other than his own pleasure; using his girlfriend as little more than another hand by which to relieve himself. But even in the cases where the boy really did care and wanted to make everything special and perfect; more often than not, he fell miles short of the mark.

Apple loved Chip and she knew he loved her. The idea that their first time might be horrible (at least for her), while statistically guaranteed, made her feel sad and a bit fearful. She didn't want to be disappointed; but, more so, she didn't want him to feel like she was disappointed. But she also knew she didn't want to be with anyone else, that regardless of when they had their first time they had would have the same abysmal chance of mutual satisfaction, and she had been feeling for the past week that this was something she wanted to do sooner rather than later.

Not that she had planned it for tonight. In fact she had been thinking a little later, maybe at the Fall Formal. That did seem to be the majority's pick for best time to give up one's virtue; but everything seemed to work out so perfectly tonight, she had decided to go for it. And now she was more than glad she did.

Far from being a disappointment, Chip had been an extremely pleasant surprise. His knowledge of the female anatomy and what to do with it was so precise and breathtaking, she would have assumed such knowledge could only be consumed over several lifetimes of pouring over the most obscure volumes of ancient text dedicated to the joys of the flesh; followed by several more lifetimes of particle application.

When she could finally bring herself to form words, she said, "W-where, where did you learn to do all that? Holy crap! I still don't think I can feel my toes!"

Chip, who had been lost within his head. snapped back to Earth. Apple's question was a procedural one. He was good at that; answering questions. "Well," he started, "when things became serious between us, I, uh, thought intercourse might be a possibility someday, in the future, the distant future. So I took and thought about it as a giant science problem. I looked at all the variables, studied all the information I could about first times, the body's neurological systems, common reactions to certain stimuli, possible psychological barriers, and so on. Once I collected all my data; I came up with a routine that would provide maximum stimulation for you while not causing me to, uh, well, eh, cross the finish line early.

Apple turned to him and shot him a look that was halfway between annoyed frustration and loving amusement. "Why to charm a girl there Chip."

Chip smiled awkwardly. "Well, I realize my use of the scientific method to provide sexual satisfaction is not the classical romantic ideal, my motivations were. I knew, on my own, I would be a disappointment. So I just wanted to do whatever it took not to be. I love you and I want to please you, in all ways."

Apple started to laugh and then rolled over and hugged him. "You did and you do sugar cube."

*******************************************************************

Aria sat stewing on the couch while Pinkie and Sonata had gone back to playing their asinine games. Their antics where childish for the human girl, but someone of Sonata's age and experience, it was down right disgraceful and made Aria just all the more certain that her former cohort was a complete idiot.

As Aria had just gotten to the point of contemplating suicide to escape this hell, Maud and Big Mac came through the door. Maud said nothing but went straight upstairs as fast as she could. Mac looked after her with a concerned expression. Soon the unmistakable sounds of vomiting could be heard coming down from up stairs.

"I better check on Maud," Pinkie said and ran off.

Sonata looked at Mac and asked, "What happened?"

"She just got a little sick on the way to the restaurant," before big Mac could finish; Maud let out a rather loud and extra pulpy sounded yack followed by coughing and cursing. Mac looked up at the ceiling and then turned sheepishly to his audience and picked up where he left off, "so we decided to come back early."

"Wow," Sonata said in surprise. "I thought human females only got sick in the morning when the were pregnant."

Mac's mouth dropped open in shock. "You, you knew?"

"Well, duh," Sonata responded. "It's not like I haven't seen a million pregnancies over my time."

Mac shot a look over to Aria who was quietly smirking. While she was amused to see the humans attempt to keep their love child a secret fall apart, she did realize that it came at the cost of some her leverage over them.

"Does Pinkie know?" he asked, half afraid of the answer.

Sonata shrugged. "I dunno. I haven't asked." Then, as if scripted, she yelled up and asked, "PINKIE, DID YOU KNOW THAT MAUD IS PREGNANT?"

"OM MY GOD! MAUD!" Pinkie squealed in pure delight.

Mac slapped his hand over his face while Aria tauntingly said, "She does now."

"I'm gonna say by to Maud and then we'll get back to the farm," Big Mac said, barely holding back his anger at being outed like this. "Hopefully Apple and Chip are done studying."

*****************************************************************

Apple walked Chip to the front door. Their hands locked in a grip so tight, that had not they been in the opiate state of love, surely would have been unbearably painful. Chip opened the door and they walked onto the porch.

"I don't want to go but I have to," Chip said, still feeling to high on romantic bliss to even feel sorrowful at his departure.

"I know, I feel the same," Apple sighed.

They kissed once more, exchange some vows of love and then Chip slowly walked off and drove off. Apple watched as he disappeared into the darkness of the night, turned around and then walked back inside.

"How'd the studyin' go?"

Apple whipped around in shock to see Big Mac come from out the front room.

"Uh, Big Mac, I thought you were out with Maud," she said not even trying to hide her fear.

"I did, but she got sick so I had to call it early." His face was blank and gave up nothing.

"Oh. Well, what time didja get back?"

"Oh somewhere between, 'oh, oh, oh yes right there', and 'sweet Jesus take me home Chippy'."

Apple's face turned the deepest crimson and she started to shake and yet freeze in place at the same time; tears welling up in her eyes.

Big Mac then smiled. "Applejack, Jenn, it's ok. I ain't no virgin and I'd be the biggest darn hypocrite to insist you was one as well. Chip's a good guy and you both love each other. I understand and it's ok."

Apple ran over to Big Mac and gave him a huge hug. "Thank you, thank you," she said over and over in heavy sobs.

After she had calmed down, Big Mac step backed and looked her in the eyes, a serious expression upon his face. "All I ask is you be careful. I don't want you to end up like me."

Apple looked at him with a confused expression for a bit before the full weight of his words and their meaning became clear. "Oh my God Big Mac! Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

He smiled and nodded. Apple hugged him again. "What are we gonna tell Granny?" she asked concerned but still happy at the news of her becoming an aunt.

Mac shook his head. "How's about we all just keep quiet for a bit longer? I don't think Granny would want to know she raised to hedonist. At least not quite yet."

"Agreed."