The next morning, as my alarm clock was singing to Pinkie Pie and me, sometime around nine in the morning, I got up and turned on the lights, then went back to my side of the bed to let the song play through before turning off my alarm clock. But, as I was listening to the song, I heard an unexpected, light tapping sound coming from the other side of the bed. I turned around to see Pinkie Pie looking at me while her tail was arched a little higher than usual.

I got up to have a look, but the tapping sound stopped before I could see for sure if it was Pinkie Pie urinating off the bed. When I circled the bed to see for sure, I did see a wet spot on the carpet between the bed and the wall, directly behind the little pink filly.

One thing I’ll say about Pinkie Pie. She was at least polite enough to aim her urine stream off the bed. But, that was just the beginning.

I saw that her tail was still arched, so I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised at the emergence of feces that came next. Again it didn’t touch the bed; and, considering how much had come back up out of her mouth that last night, it wasn't surprising that very little was leaving her bowels. But, when it was all over, I still had a mess to clean up.

In the mean time, she’d distracted me along enough that my alarm clock had finished the first song it was playing, and had moved on to the next one.

I walked quickly to the alarm clock and pushed a button to reset it, then went into the kitchen for some paper towels to clean up the mess that Pinkie Pie had made.

I suppose it was a good thing that my parents hadn’t woken up yet, or at least I didn’t hear anything from the room they’d chosen as I got the paper towels.

When I got back to my room, I saw Pinkie Pie between the bed and the wall, all-fours position, in the middle of the mess she'd made.

As the pink filly looked up at me, I can only guess she could sense my anger, as she lowered her head and her ears folded backwards. I can only guess she was expecting some kind of punishment for the mess she'd made, or that she was now in it, or something similar.

I must admit, seeing her the way she was, I wasn’t the happiest I could’ve been. But, seeing her on all fours in her own urine, awaiting whatever punishment I might have in store for her, I found I couldn't bring myself to do anything to carry it out. After all, this was her first day on Earth, her first day in a new world. She didn’t know about the rules of the house, she wasn't familiar with any rules. How could I enforce rules on a creature that most likely wouldn't understand? But, there was one thing I could do.

I set the paper towels aside, reached out and picked up the pink filly, then took her to the bathroom to give her, and my hands, a rinse. After that, I went back to the bedroom and did my best to clean up the mess she’d made between the bed and the wall, including some of the urine which had ended up on the wall itself. Whatever was left I’d have to deal with later. At the moment, I had a bunch of paper towels to throw away, then a meal to prepare, at least for me and my parents.

By the time I returned to the kitchen, my parents were there, talking about what to do about the “new addition to the family.” As soon as they saw me, with my hands full of dirty paper towels, my dad asked, “Is everything alright?”

I answered, “Yeah, everything’s fine. Pinkie Pie just made her first mess, that’s all.” I suppose, technically, it was her second mess. On the other hand, it was her first mess of her second day.

Mom asked, “Is she alright? What happened?”

Then, from my right, I heard the familiar whinny of the pink filly, and looked down to see her next to me in the doorway.

I answered, “As you can see, she’s fine. She had to relieve herself, and decided to do so off of the bed. I’ll give her that much, she didn’t mess the bed, just the floor between it and the wall.”

I didn’t realize until I looked behind her that I’d forgotten to dry her after rinsing her off. Behind her was a trail of wet hoof-prints leading from my bedroom.

Mom said, “If you’re going to keep a pet in the house, you’re gonna have to train her.”

It was something I knew already, but I guess it didn’t hurt to hear it again. I said, “That’ll have to wait until after I find out more about her. Until then, let’s take her to the vet. There must be some reason why her mane and tail keep curling and uncurling.”

Neither mom nor dad argued that point. I think they were as puzzled over the behavior of her mane and tail as I was. But, first thing came first.

I went into the kitchen, followed by my parents and Pinkie Pie, and my parents and I prepared a breakfast for the three of us, and I provided another bowl of milk for Pinkie Pie, this time less than before. I didn’t want a repeat of last night’s spill.

After fixing and having breakfast, we went outside, dressed for winter; and I kept Pinkie Pie in my coat, since I wasn’t sure how well she’d tolerate the cold.

One observation I’ll make right now. Pinkie Pie’s mane and tail remained straight, and her mane to one side of her head and neck, for the time she seemed to feel she was in trouble. And, it was only her posture that suggested she sensed any trouble. Now that she was safe in my coat, her mane went back to curling and uncurling as it had been doing before.

We walked to my parents’ house, which wasn’t more than a block away, got into the van; and my parents drove to the veterinary clinic in town, after which we entered the clinic, with me still holding the pink foal in my coat.

And, here’s another interesting thing. Pinkie Pie’s mane remained curly the whole time we were in the van. I had to wonder if that meant that she was enjoying the ride. Little was I to realize that I’d be right, just not for the reason I thought it was.

I had a rather interesting time explaining to the people there how I’d gotten this pink foal, and why I was bringing her in. Clearly a checkup was in order. Perhaps that would help solve the mystery of why Pinkie Pie’s mane and tail kept curling and uncurling.

The doctor who gave the checkup to Pinkie Pie didn’t have too much of a problem studying her. That is, until he took out a pair of scissors and attempted to cut off a hair from her tail.

At that point, Pinkie Pie’s mane and tail went straight, her mane fell to one side of her head and neck, and she started growling at the veterinarian. She kept her face to the vet, not allowing him anywhere near her tail.

At this point, I leaned in close to her and said, “Now, the doctor just wants a sample of your hair.”

To my surprise, I clearly heard her say, “No.” It wasn’t a whinny that sounded like the word, it was that word.

I asked, “What’s wrong? Couldn’t he just have just one hair?”

Pinkie Pie answered, “No. No cut hair.”

Whatever the pink pony’s origins were, they clearly gave her the ability to learn very rapidly, at least how to speak. I began to wonder if this ability to learn expanded to other areas. But, now wasn’t the time for such curiosity.

Standing up straight again, I asked the doctor, “Is there some way you could study her hair without cutting it?”

The veterinarian set the scissors on a nearby table, then, taking a moment to think it over, said, “I suppose I could bring in the microscope, or you could bring this foal into the lab where the microscope is, and I could just study a sample of her mane or tail without cutting it.”

I turned to Pinkie Pie and asked, “Is that alright with you?”

Pinkie Pie calmed down and answered, “Study. No cut.”

I turned back to the doctor and said, “I guess that’s a yes.”

The veterinarian took a step backwards toward the door he’d entered through and said, “I’ll be right back.” And, with that, he was gone to get the microscope.

Pinkie Pie’s mane and tail remained straight, and her mane remained on the one side of her head, as she eyed the scissors suspiciously.

I tried calming her down further by stroking her on her opposite side from me and saying, “It’s alright, Pinkie. The veterinarian’s just going to get the microscope, and he’ll study your hair then. You don’t need to worry about the scissors anymore.”

I could feel her vibrating as she said, “No scissors. No cut hair.”

At this point, I knelt down so I was eye-level with the pink filly and, gently using a finger to direct her attention to my face, I said, “It’s alright, Pinkie. I won’t let anyone hurt you.” And, for reassurance, I hugged her.

That seemed to work. She relaxed somewhat, although, when I backed away, she still stared at the scissors on the table.

To this day I still don’t know why she was so scared of those scissors.

Not long after I stopped hugging Pinkie Pie the veterinarian came in with the microscope, then put it next to Pinkie Pie.

The pink foal just kept staring suspiciously at the scissors.

I asked the doctor, “Do you think you could put those scissors somewhere else? They’re really scaring Pinkie.”

The doctor didn’t answer vocally, just walked over to the table where the scissors were, opened a drawer under the nearby counter, picked up the scissors and put them into the drawer, then closed it. He then turned to me and asked, “How’s that?”

I looked down at Pinkie Pie and noticed that her mane and tail immediately started curling again. I turned back to the veterinarian and said, “Much better.”

In the mean time, Pinkie Pie started sniffing at the microscope.

Then, the doctor walked over and turned a light on under the microscope, startling the pink pony. He then produced a thin glass and a spray bottle. After spraying the glass, he moved behind Pinkie Pie, separated one strand of hair from her tail, put it lengthwise on the glass, then set it under the microscope.

Pinkie Pie was as curious as I was to see what the doctor would discover about her hair, at least on her tail.

After a few minutes, the vet backed away form the microscope and, gesturing for me to have a look inside, said, “Whatever’s causing her hair to move around the way it does, I can’t find it. I expected to see muscle fibers or something that’d make her tail hair curl and uncurl the way it does, but I just can't find any.”

I had a look into the microscope, but I couldn’t see anything in the hair either.

When Pinkie Pie tried to get a look into the microscope, she pulled the hair free and was unable to get a good look at it.

The doctor tried the same thing with a hair of Pinkie Pie’s mane, but couldn’t find anything there either. Whatever was causing Pinkie Pie’s mane and tail to continually curl and uncurl, except when she sensed danger or was enjoying something, it had nothing to do with the hair itself. And, the rest of her body fur didn’t curl or uncurl. It was just her mane and tail.

The checkup cost some one hundred fifty dollars, which I paid.

After that, I carried Pinkie Pie as my parents and I started for the front door.

Just then, the bishop of our ward, Bishop Morris, walked in and, seeing the pink foal in my coat, said, “I see you’ve got a new pet.”

I answered, “Her name is Pinkie Pie. My parents and I just brought her in to figure out why her hair’s always curling and uncurling.”

Presently Bishop Morris said, “You do realize what you have there are conjoined twin ponies.”

All I could do, at that moment, was grunt in curious confusion.

The bishop elaborated, “Pinkie Pie is actually two identical ponies. They’ve been conjoined so completely that they’re essentially two pony spirits in one pony body.” He then asked, “What’s her full name?”

I answered, “Pinkamena Diane Pie.”

Before I could ask why he wanted to know, he said, “Those first two names aren’t just the first and middle names of one pony. One of the twins is Pinkamena. The other one is Diane. You’ll be able to tell the difference.” He then held the door open for my parents and me to leave.

As I passed Bishop Morris, all I could think to say was “Thanks.”

The bishop answered, “You’ll know which one’s which, as you’ve seen that one of the twins has curly mane and tail, and the other one has straight mane and tail. You’ll know which name to give which pony. And, after that, just ask for the pony by name, and she’ll let you know she’s listening. Or, you can just call her Pinkie.”

After that, mom, dad and I went back into the van; and we headed back for my parents’ home.

On the way there, noticing that Pinkie Pie’s mane was remaining curly, I decided to give it a try; so, I asked, “Pinkamena?”

She responded by turning to me and whinnying in curiosity. I dare say the whinny sounded like she was asking, “Huh?”

At this point, I thought aloud, “So, your sister is Diane?”

Pinkie, no, Pinkamena, whinnied, “Uh huh,” then turned back to the window.

Honestly, I hadn’t thought of that possibility. Pinkie Pie’s hair curls when Pinkamena is in control; then her hair straightens out, and her mane falls to one side of her head and neck, when Diane is in control. What else was I going to learn about this pink pony? Most certainly those DVDs and the CD would have information that was going to prove useful to me, hopefully information on Pinkie Pie’s background.

When we got back to my parents’ house, I, still keeping Pinkie Pie in my coat, said goodbye to them and headed back home again.

Once there, I let Pinkie Pie out of my coat, then put it away, then turned to the pink pony and said, “Well, it’s just been one day, and you’ve already taught me quite a lot about you.” I then knelt down and stroked her mane and said, “I enjoy a good learning experience, and I can see that living with you is gonna give me a whole lot of them. Maybe together we can get a better idea about what your background is from those discs, and I can learn better how to take care of you. So, what do you say? Are you ready to get started?”

I wasn’t expecting it, but Pinkie Pie crouched, then leaped into my chest, causing me to close my arms around her to keep her from falling backwards away from me again. She then nuzzled and licked my chin, then whinnied, “Daddy!”

Again that thrill. Whatever else I was going to do, it was going to be with Pinkie Pie at my side; and I was going to be at her side. Then I realized something: in all the activity, I’d forgotten that I needed to use the bathroom. Then I also realized that it was the perfect opportunity to teach Pinkie Pie how to use the toilet. And, if there was one thing good that came out of this morning’s event, it was knowing how Pinkie Pie expels waste.

Under normal conditions, when I saw a creature, real or fake, watching me, I wouldn’t be able to urinate or defecate. But, for some reason, I didn’t have that problem around Pinkie Pie.

I didn’t immediately undress in front of her, I just opened the lid of the toilet and told her, “Now, the next time you need to urinate or defecate, I want you to come in here and aim it into this basin here. But, open the lid first.”

The way her head was tilted, she was making it clear she didn’t understand what I was saying, or at least didn’t understand the words “urinate” and “defecate.”

I had a foot stool nearby under the sink, so I pulled that out and tapped it, inviting Pinkie Pie to jump up on it. I then said, "I’ll now demonstrate urinating for you.” And, yes, I undid my pants, opened up and proceeded to urinate into the toilet in front of Pinkie Pie.

When I was finished, Pinkie Pie proceeded to turn around, point her tail up in the air, and squirt a fountain of urine into the toilet, not unlike what I had done. Except, she got more on the toilet seat, or onto the floor, than she got into the toilet.

When she stopped and turned around and saw all she’d done, she looked up at me and frowned, even whinnied sorrowfully.

I reached out and stroked her mane as I said, “It’s alright. Human males, like myself, urinate standing up. Human females urinate sitting down. How human females urinate’ll probably work best for you.” Then, as I pulled my pants and underwear down, I continued, “Now, I’ll demonstrate defecating for you.” I found it surprisingly easy, while more or less sitting above the toilet seat, to have a bowel movement in front of the curious pink pony.

Again when I was finished and stood up, Pinkie Pie turned around again and pointed her backside over the toilet; but this time she proceeded to empty her bowels. Unfortunately, since her colon was already empty, she had nothing to empty into the toilet from there. But, on the other hand, as much as one might expect such a creature as small as Pinkie Pie was to fall into the toilet, surprisingly enough, she didn’t.

When the pink filly was finished trying, she turned to me, panting, and groaned in disappointment.

But, her disappointment turned into happiness when I said, “It's alright. When you need to, I'm sure you'll do it,” and gave her a thumbs-up gesture. After that, I said, “Now, us humans like to clean ourselves after we’ve defecated. If you think you need to clean your own backside, you can stay here and do so. If you think you need to, just stay; and I’ll get you some toilet paper. Otherwise, you can just go on and wait for me in my bedroom. But, I’m gonna stay here and get cleaned up, then clean up the bathroom as well. Then, I think we’ll get something to eat, and watch one of those videos on one of those DVDs. Does that sound good to you?”

Pinkie Pie just stared at me as though I was crazy.

Seeing that she wasn’t leaving, I took some toilet paper, folded it, and handed it to her. I then got some for myself and proceeded to use it.

I couldn’t help watch as Pinkie Pie observed my example, then look at the toilet paper I’d given her, then proceed to turn away from it and trot out of the bathroom.

When I was finished I pulled up my underwear and pants, then proceeded to use the paper I’d offered to Pinkie Pie to clean up the mess she’d made on the floor and the toilet seat. After that, I went and got a snack for myself, some popcorn, then proceeded to my study room, parallel to the hallway; then, with Pinkie Pie following close behind me, set up a folding chair for her and took the swiveling chair for myself. I then turned on my computer, took the disc marked “My Little Pony Friendship is Magic season 1,” and put it into my computer’s DVD player, then waited for the media player to turn on, acknowledge the disc, and offer a list of the files on the list for me to choose to watch. After a few seconds of reading the twenty-six file names, I chose the first episode, which was entitled “Friendship is Magic Part 1,” and sat back to watch the episode with the pink filly.

I had expected it to be informative, and perhaps part of me expected to get information on Pinkie Pie’s friends as well as her. I guess a part of me just expected it to surround Pinkie Pie. Instead, when the story actually started, it was about a purple horned pony, a unicorn, called Twilight. I was later to learn that her full name was Twilight Sparkle. She was a librarian of sorts, or that’s what I gathered from her presence in a library setting when I saw her during the progress of the episode. And she had a dragon helping her, purple-colored, named Spike. Also, this Twilight Sparkle didn’t originally live in Ponyville, but in a place called Canterlot.

I began to get the feeling that these names were perhaps variations of places I’d heard of. Canterlot, for instance, sounded a lot like Camelot. I began to wonder, what other places would remind me of places I’d heard of? This place, Ponyville, didn’t remind me of anyplace I’d particularly heard of, except perhaps Orangeville? But, that seemed unlikely to me.

In the mean time, Pinkie Pie seemed just as fascinated by the video that was playing as I was. The introductory song was similar to the theme song from the original “My Little Pony” series, except, after the title was quoted twice, the theme changed dramatically. As the tempo became more upbeat, the title “My Little Pony” was repeated, but in the background; while, in the foreground, lyrics I wasn’t familiar with were sung to a different tune that went along with the background theme, evidently following the theme of the rest of the title, “Friendship is Magic.”

At any rate, I shared my popcorn with Pinkie Pie as we watched the story unfold, of this Twilight Sparkle being assigned to move to Ponyville to make friends with other ponies there. Pinkie Pie was the first she met, and I think the reaction of the Pinkie Pie in the video was as surprising to the Pinkie Pie sitting next to me as it was funny to me. Later on, she’d explain why she reacted the way she did; but in the mean time Twilight had other ponies to meet: a yellow winged pony, or pegasus, named Fluttershy, a blue pegasus named Rainbow Dash, no doubt because of the rainbow-colored mane; an orange pony named Applejack, and a white unicorn named Rarity. And, it still seems to me that Rarity was very appropriately named.

In fact, all the ponies were, as far as I could tell, appropriately named. And, all the ponies were female. So, considering the word “pegasus” was given a Latin theme, it seemed to me then, and it still does now, more appropriate to call Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash “pegasae,” and, in singular, “pegasa.” But, let’s get back to the story.

The reason for her mission to Ponyville, to make friends with five other ponies, was to help her to deal with a menace known as Nightmare Moon, which was scheduled to appear during the approaching Summer Sun Festival, evidently an event celebrating another pony known as Princess Celestia, who was scheduled to appear in the town hall. When she failed to appear on schedule, she was replaced by the previously mentioned Nightmare Moon.

The appearance of Nightmare Moon was interesting to me, although terrifying to Pinkie Pie, who grabbed hold of my closest arm and wouldn’t let go until the black, winged-and-horned, evidently carnivorous horse disappeared from the screen. And even then, as I stroked the side of her neck opposite me, I could still feel her vibrating. If I didn’t calm her down, I had a feeling I was going to have one sleepless night.

The episode ended, I must admit, leaving me to wonder what was going to happen next. And, considering the whimpering little filly that was seated next to me, I figured I needed to do something at the very least for her sake. So, after the closing credits, I clicked on the picture of the second episode, which was titled “Friendship is Magic Part 2,” to see how this two-part episode was going to end.

After a review of the highlights of the first episode, and the opening theme and credits, Nightmare Moon disappeared after a while; and the scene shifted to a view of Spike sleeping, evidently having a nightmare about what he’d seen. Considering the dragon’s evidently traumatic experience, I still have to wonder why Twilight left him alone to go search for the elements of harmony, which she’d describe to her friends soon after covering the little dragon.

The young Pinkie Pie was fascinated to see her cartoon self first find a book for Twilight, then help the group laugh their way out of a forest scene where they were surrounded by trees with ghostly faces. I’d already had a look at Pinkie Pie’s more unusual physical attributes, watching her mane curl and uncurl, then found out that what I was seeing was evidence that the pink filly was actually two ponies in one. Now, the two (three?) of us were getting an understanding of Pinkie Pie’s character in the show. We would later learn that what we’d seen was proof that Pinkie Pie was the bearer of one of the elements, specifically the element of laughter.

There was a cliff scene which, according to the end of the episode, was supposed to demonstrate that Applejack, the orange pony, was intended to hold the element of honesty. Another scene, involving a wailing taniwha in a river, was supposed to show that the white unicorn Rarity would bear the element of generosity, because she’d chopped off her tail to use as the taniwha’s missing facial hair. One scene involving a broken bridge over a chasm was intended to show that the blue pegasa with the six-colored mane and tail, Rainbow Dash, was going to bear the element of loyalty. Then, one of the earliest scenes involving a manticore, evidently a lion with a scorpion’s tail and bat wings, was supposed to prove the yellow pegasa, Fluttershy, was going to bear the element of kindness. But, it was the last scene, when the group of six ponies dealt with Nightmare Moon, that Twilight would realize she would bear the element of magic. Which, considering the show was called “Friendship is Magic,” makes a lot of sense, I suppose.

I think, when Pinkie Pie saw Nightmare Moon, with the help of the rainbow that came from the jewelry that the six ponies wore, turned into Princess Luna, the apparently long-lost sister of Princess Celestia, a white horse with wings and a horn, the little pink foal seemed ashamed of having been scared of the black horse with the bat's wings and the horn. But, after all, who could blame her for being so scared?

I didn’t find the creature that scary because, after all, I knew it was a cartoon; and wouldn’t be able to harm me. But, Pinkie Pie, as young as she was, wouldn’t have known that.

The good news is the show would indeed help me learn about Pinkie Pie, especially while she watched it with me. The bad news? Well, that’ll come later. For now, it’s sufficient for me to say that I didn’t have such a sleepless night after all. In fact, as much as one might not expect it, that was one of the more restful nights I ever had.

Author's Notes:

By the way, the word taniwha is Maori, and means "water monster." Specifically, a taniwha is a draconian water monster, or water dragon.