Universes Apart

by Shotoman

First published 19th of November, 2015

Time travel has become normal for the Doctor. Alternate dimensions? That's still a little new and different.

While trying to run an annoying intergalactic pest out of Ponyville, Derpy and the Doctor end up in a whole other universe. Strange, but not unheard of. The weird part is the new bodies that came with the trip. The even weirder part comes when the Doctor meets the locals.

He always did wonder whatever happened to Sunset Shimmer.

Chapter 1

Unsurprising given that it was the home of the Princess of Friendship, Ponyville was quite possibly the friendliest place in Equestria. Usually. Today, however, it was... not. Arguments had burst out everywhere. Hooffights were at an all time high. The police department, with just a pair of overnight cells and a small hooffull of officers, which dealt more in disturbances from the Everfree Forest than civil unrest, were rather overwhelmed. Sad to say, even the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony were not immune, with Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash themselves being held in separate rooms in the castle, nursing black eyes and bruises from their own hooffight.

Princess Twilight had her hooves full today.

As her unmistakable violet form streaked across the sky, one particular earth pony ran a hoof through is short, messy brown mane. “And there she goes, off to stop another hullabaloo.” A chuckle escaped his lips. “Well, this is all rather horrible, isn't it, Derpy?” he said as he turned to his partner, a gray pegasus with misaligned gold eyes and messy blonde mane.

She nodded. “How did a... what'sitcalled?”

“Nnn'tok.”

“Right, Nnn'tok. How'd one of those get here, anyway, Doctor?”

The Doctor rubbed his chin, with a rather embarrassed grin on his face. “Ahh, well, that may be our fault. Nnn'toks are common pests over at Poleron X, and our little invader may have managed to get into, or even just cling to, the TARDIS on our way home. Watch it!”

The Doctor pulled Derpy into a nearby alley as Berry Punch hit the ground where they were standing just moments ago. “And stay out!” the proprietor of the store she just flew out of yelled just before slamming the door shut.

“Yeah yeah. Like anypony'd want more of your slop,” she grumbled before stumbling off.

“If it's such a common pest, why is it affecting the town so bad?” Derpy whispered.

The Doctor shrugged. “Pests carry diseases. For Poleronians, most diseases are of a psychic sort, and Ponyville would naturally not have any sort of defenses or immunity.” The Doctor pulled his sonic screwdriver from his coat and pressed a button, grinning as the emitter lit up bright green. “Not to worry, this thing's been going for about ten hours now, and should run its course within the next two. Ponyville's a hardy little place, it'll survive. Princess Sparkle will see to that. But we still must find that nnn'tok. Get it back where it belongs. Don't want any other cases like this one, 'specially since we don't know if it's brought any buns in the oven if you know what I mean.”

Derpy nodded. “Oooh. I hadn't even thought of that.” At the Doctor's raised eyebrow she said, “What? Were you expecting me to be all 'Mmmm, buns'? When things're this bad? C'mon.”

The Doctor chuckled as he began making sweeps with his screwdriver. “Of course, of course. No time for silly when Ponyville is punching itself out.” After a moment, he grunted in disappointment. “I can't get a clear reading of the thing,” he said as he shook the sonic screwdriver.

“Try reversing the polarity of the neutron flow!” a high pitched, sugary voice said from above.

The Doctor groaned as he looked up to see a very pink face peering down at the two with a pair of very blue eyes from a nearby rooftop. “Hiya, Pinkie!” Derpy said with a wave.

“Yes, hello, Pinkie Pie,” the Doctor said with considerably less enthusiasm as she dropped from the roof and landed right next to him. “Do you even know what 'reverse the polarity of the neutron flow' means?”

“Nopers! Not a word! But I bet it'll still help ya.”

The Doctor gave a sigh, knowing better than to argue, and punched in the settings. “Huh,” he said, surprised (though even he knew he shouldn't be anymore at this point). “I've got a firm lock on, now. Thank you, Pinkie.”

“No problemo, Doctor,” Pinkie almost sang as she started to skip away. “I gotta go help Twilight with a fracas, now. See ya!”

“She is so weird,” Derpy said with a chuckle as Pinkie skipped away, nonchalantly dodging any hints of violence coming her way.

“Yes, she is,” the Doctor agreed. “Word of advice, never try to figure out the 'why's and wherefores' of that weirdness. That is a road that leads to madness. Now, with my screwdriver set to the right setting, let's...” the Doctor sighed again. It was just one of those days, wasn't it? “It's in the lower levels of the Castle of Friendship.”

Derpy actually laughed at that. “Of course it is. It can't be too easy, can it? So, are we gonna keep hiding in this alley all day or are we gonna go get it?”

“Where did you pick up this near suicidal need to rush into the unknown, Derpy?” the Doctor asked, a small smile on his face as he started back out in the streets.

“From you,” was the response.

“And don't you forget it. Now, come along.”

“You know, you'd think Princess Twilight would have guards or something,” Derpy noted as they rather easily made their way to the basement of Equestria's newest castle.

The Doctor shrugged easily as he continued to follow the path left by their target. Removing his screwdriver from his mouth he said, “That'll come in time. She's rather new to this whole 'princess' thing, and the castle itself is only a couple of months old. Besides, she's left plenty of traps, in the form of enemy-detecting spells and charms. The only reason we're traversing the place so easily is because of that time her future self charmed us against such things. The place already recognizes us as friends, otherwise we'd likely already be caged up at Canterlot, probably with polka-dots in our coats and the taste of purple in our mouths.”

“Like last Tuesday?”

“Essentially, but without the threat of immediate, painful death. We are thinking of the same last Tuesday, aren't we?”

Now it was Derpy's turn to shrug. “Who knows anymore?” she said with a grin. “I'm pretty sure we've seen all the Tuesdays, and we're always caged up under threat of immediate, painful death.”

“True enough,” the Doctor conceded. They continued onward, making light banter until they came to what was obviously one of Twilight's labs, and within it, an odd sight. A large, oval mirror with a gold frame, attached to such an odd arrangement of machinery and devices that it could only have been designed by the Doctor himself, or Twilight Sparkle, and the Doctor was about 86% certain that he didn't make it.

“So, what is it?” Derpy asked.

“Well, it's a mirror, obviously,” the Doctor said, his screwdriver still trained on it.

“Yeah. Duh. But what's up with... the rest of it?”

“No idea, but the nnn'tok's trail ends here.” The Doctor began to hum a little in thought as he put the sonic screwdriver back in one of his pockets. “I do wonder...” he said softly as he gently tried to touch the glass with a forehoof. The hoof went right through, easy as if the glass were water. A mad grin split his face. “Brilliant! It's a portal! The odd patchwork of technology attached to it must keep it self perpetuating!”

“Okay, that makes sense,” Derpy said. “So where does it go?”

The Doctor shot her that smile. The one that let her know she was likely to regret the next few minutes. “Only one way to find out!”

“Oh, no. You're not gonna...?”

The rest of Derpy's question was interrupted as the Doctor shouted “Allons-Y!” and leaped right on through the looking glass, vanishing without a trace.

Derpy brought a hoof to her face. “Oh, this is crazy, even for us.” But when she uncovered her eyes and looked at her reflection where the Doctor had vanished, there was a grin on her face. Really, there was only one thing for it. Derpy took a couple of steps back, then made a running leap of her own.

“Cannonball!”

Derpy's landing was rather on the painful side, it was a hard fall right on her rump, followed by a rolling tumble which left her pretty well face first in the cement she landed on. Eyes jammed closed, she propped herself up on a foreleg and rubbed her sore tush with the other. “Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow. Ow. Okay. That was dumb,” she said under her breath. Then her thoughts stopped suddenly. Something... was wrong. It was a general feeling. Her whole body felt off. But there was one thing, one specific thing, that was definitely missing.

“Where's my tail?”

At that realization her eyes popped open, and she brought her foreleg from her still sore back end and into view, and gasped at what she saw. It was considerably more slender than usual, and instead of a hoof, ended in a five fingered hand (and, yes, she did know what a hand was. All of time and space equaled a lot of different species after all.). After a brief moment of staring at the now-wiggling digits, Derpy yelped and leaped to her feet. Or tried to at any rate; her mind and body got into a bit of an argument over whether she was quad or bipedal, and she immediately fell backwards again, right into a pair of waiting arms.

“'Ey. Careful there,” a wonderfully trottingham-accented voice said.

Derpy looked up and grinned. Despite the flat face, small nose, and odd little ears on either side of his head, there was no mistaking those blue eyes, giddy smile, and unkempt mess of brown hair on his head. “Thanks, Doctor.” Then she noticed something and pouted. “You're already walking on two legs, like you've always done it. That's so not fair.”

The Doctor's grin widened. “It's not my fault I've already changed bodies nine times in the past.”

Derpy harrumphed as she struggled up to her feet. She took a few halting steps, her arms stretched out for balance. “And all of 'em were pony-like, so you can't use that as an excuse.”

“Excuse me!” The Doctor said in an affronted tone. “I'm not pony-like, you're Time Charger-like.”

Derpy smirked as she took in the Doctor's full form. Tall and skinny, naturally, and that old brown overcoat of his had changed to fit the new form, with a patch resembling his hourglass cutie mark now sewn on the shoulder of the right sleeve. From what was visible, he was wearing a blue suit underneath, and odd red and white shoes adorned his feet. His posture was annoyingly easy, his hands in his pockets, and his grin was wry.

“I got news for you, Doctor,” Derpy said with a smirk. “It doesn't matter today. You're not pony like or Time Charger-like, today.”

“The same could be said of you,” the Doctor responded.

Derpy looked down and took in her blue top/green skirt combo, with her bubble cutie mark going up the right side of the skirt. “Hey, not baaooaoah!” Derpy came very close to falling over again, but a moment of unsteadiness with her arms wheeling about, and she was able to regain balance. “That is going to take some getting used to,” she said, rubbing the back of her head. She frowned as she noticed something. “Seems like I got a lot more mane than before.”

The Doctor similarly rubbed the back of his head. “Yeah, and yet I seem to have considerably less.” When his fingers found his newfound sideburns he added, “mostly.” His expression brightened as he waggled his fingers in front of his face. “By the way, I love these hands. So very useful.” He withdrew his screwdriver from his coat and began rolling it around his fingers. “Especially for building and operating complex machinery. Can you just imagine how much easier piloting the TARDIS would be with opposable thumbs?” He suddenly dawned a slightly confused frown. “You know, it does make me wonder how we got along with hooves for so long. You know, from an evolutionary standpoint.”

“You can keep 'em,” Derpy said as she slowly turned around and took in the large, rather majestic unicorn statue that they were standing in front of. “I miss my hooves already.” She poked the mirrored base of the statue with a finger and sighed with relief when it rippled as if it was water. “Portal home still works.”

“Excellent,” the Doctor said, his eyebrows doing a quick waggle. “Oooh, I would love to take that mirror home and study her for a night or two. A portal to another world is one thing, especially on a magically strong world like yours. But a portal to another world with such unique morphogenic properties is something else entirely.”

“Getting distracted again, Doctor,” Derpy reminded him, as she began circling the statue.

“Right! Yes! Distracted! Thank you Derpy. Always keeping my head in the game, and my focus on track. That's why I keep you around, after all.”

“And here I thought it was because I was cute as a button and had an adorable, bubbly personality.”

The Doctor coughed, as pink tinged his cheeks and ears. “Er, well, I... ah... wouldn't know about... please, Derpy. It's time to focus.”

Ignoring the smirk he knew was on Derpy's face, the Doctor pointed his screwdriver at the building he just now noticed they were in front of. It was large—far larger than anything in Ponyville, with a design aesthetic that wouldn't have been out of place in Canterlot. It was certainly pretentious enough, in the Doctor's opinion. It was a violet color, with a stained glass window in the center, golden pony heads on each corner, and a clock tower in the middle of the domed roof. It would take hours to search the place for something as small as an Nnn'Tok, even with a precision instrument like the sonic.

So, naturally, it the signal was pointing right at the place.

“Hey, there's a sign here.” Derpy called from the other side of the statue. She ran to a golden horseshoe shaped display not too far away. “Says here the place is 'Canterlot High School.'”

One of the Doctor's eyebrows nearly rose into his hair. “Canterlot 'High School?'” He shook his head with a chuckle. “Alternate universes. Always something juuuust a little different.”

Derpy jogged back to the Doctor's side, even managing to stop without falling flat on her face. “Not gonna lie. I'm not exactly thrilled to be here.”

“No fond recollections of your own alma mater?” the Doctor asked.

“Not really, no,” Derpy said in a tone that caused the Doctor to frown.

“Sorry. I keep forgetting. Why is it I keep forgetting?”

Derpy gave a small but sincere smile. “Don't worry, Doctor. The stuff you forget is usually not important anyway.”

The Doctor grinned. “Quite.”

“You don't suppose it's Saturday, do you?” Immediately after Derpy asked the question a loud, trilling school bell echoed across the grounds.

Once again the Doctor smirked in amusement. “When have we ever been that lucky?”

Author's Notes:

I've unfortunately hit something of a dead end with "Time Keeps Wibbling On." One of those, I mostly know where I want it to go but every time I try to write it nothing comes out" kind of things. So I'm doing something a little lighter and breezier for a bit. Just to keep the juices flowing as it were. Enjoy.

Chapter 2

They waited until the between classes stampede ended before going in. The main hallway was as expected, open and bare, save the rows and rows of lockers. The Doctor couldn't help but smirk. The style, level of technology, and aesthetics may be different, but the overall basics weren't entirely different from the Academy on Gallopfrey. It was enough to bring up a number of rather pleasant memories. He did notice that the same wasn't true for Derpy. She was obviously uncomfortable, biting her lip and glancing around.

"C'mon, Derpy," the Doctor said in as soothing a voice as he could muster. "You've been less nervous about sneaking into Dalek motherships."

Derpy smiled weekly. "I know, I know. I'm usually better than this."

"Was it really that bad?"

Derpy sighed. "Not all the time. You know how Ponyville is. Friendliest place in Equestria and all that. But it really only takes one bully to really ruin your day. Or week. Or year. And y'know, even the nice ponies treated me just a little different. And that's okay. I am just a little different. I'm proud of it, even. At least, nowadays. But still..."

"You don't have to do this, you know."

Derpy laughed. "You can't do anything without me, and you know it."

The Doctor scoffed. "I survived for centuries before you were born, you know."

"Sure, sure. Alone, though?"

The Doctor opened his mouth to reply, but nothing came out, so he decided to close it again. Derpy laughed again.

"What are you doing in my school?" a sudden voice interrupted, causing the two to jump. They spun to see a tall woman in a classy pantsuit strolling down the hall with a cross look on her face. The Doctor and Derpy instantly recognized her, given the multi-colored hair that still managed to look like a mystical cloud, despite not actually flowing like one.

The woman, the local version of Celestia, stopped a few feet in front of the intruders, hands on her hips, and a stern look directed specifically at Derpy. "Miss Derpy? What are you doing out of class? And who is this?"

Derpy fidgeted under the scrutiny. "Errr, well, uh..."

"Hello, yes, sorry, hi. I stumbled upon this young one as she was coming out of the loo, and she was just showing me where I needed to go," the Doctor interrupted with a smile as he withdrew an old wallet from his coat pocket. "My credentials." He opened the wallet and showed her the blank paper within.

After just a moment of looking the paper over, Celestia's demeanor softened. "Well, you certainly came fast," she said with a smile. "I was certain I'd have to teach the next class myself."

Derpy looked confused. "The next class...?"

Celestia turned her gaze back down on Derpy, this time much softer. "I apologize. Mrs. Cheerilee suddenly had to go home. Stomach ache. Left us in a bit of a bind. I wasn't certain if we'd be able to get a substitute at all today, let alone this quickly." Turning her attention back to the Doctor, she added, "If it's all right with you, Mr. Turner, I'll show you the rest of the way."

The Doctor nodded. "If it's all right with you, I'd like to thank Miss... er... Derpy, was it?... real quick before we get going."

Celestia nodded. "Certainly. Be quick, you both need to get to class."

The Doctor turned his back on Celestia to see Derpy grinning up at him. "Did you just psychic paper Princess Celestia?" she whispered.

"I think it's Headmistress Celestia, but yes, I did," he whispered back. He pulled out his sonic screwdriver and handed it to Derpy. "Here, I set it to beep at you like a metal detector. Not as precise as the readings I can see, but good enough. I'll get back to you as soon as I'm done with the class."

Derpy pocketed the sonic then ran off in a direction she hoped would be towards the classrooms. "Bye Principal Celestia!"

"No running!" Celestia called back. She rolled her eyes, though the Doctor did notice a very subtle smirk of amusement. "Now, Mr. Turner, if you'll follow me, I'll take you to your classroom."

The Doctor gave Principal Celestia an exaggerated bow. "Of course, my lady." As the two began walking down a hallway opposite of the one Derpy took, he said, "Now, as you might imagine, I was called over in something of a rush, so, if you don't mind my asking, what class am I set to teach?"

"Physics."

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "Physics. Of course."

"Sorry! Sorrysorrysorrysorry," Derpy apologized as she stumbled out of the boy's room. "I really didn't mean to."

"Yeah, no problem, Derpy," a voice from within said in the tone of one who was used to it.

Derpy sighed and entered the girl's room. She had been so focused on following the beeping sonic that she hadn't been paying attention to where she was going. And there's another me who's just as bumbly as I am. Makes things easier, I guess. The sonic beeped again. "Oh, beepies!" A moment later, she was in the back stall, the sonic beeping particularly loudly when pointed at the drain on the floor.

"Kreeee!" The sudden sound from within the drain made her jump. She heard a distinct scratching sound that faded quickly as the sonic stopped beeping. Derpy groaned. "The sewers. It's always the sewers."

She turned to leave, only to come face to face with... herself. At least, she assumed it was herself. Grey skin, blonde hair, blue and green outfit, and googly eyes. A second later, she also confirmed that she wasn't looking at a mirror. A nervous smirk crossed her face. "Hi," she said with a small wave.

The other Derpy suddenly sprouted a huge smile and said, "Hi! You from the other side of the portal thing?"

"I'm... wait, what?"

"Hello there, class," the Doctor said as he entered the classroom. "As you might guess, I'm your substitute teacher for the day. I'm Mr. Time Turner." Here he wrote his name in big letters on the chalkboard. "Now..." He turned to face the class, and as soon as he saw the room full of eyes staring up at him--a certain appreciation in the eyes of roughly half the girls that he did, in fact, catch--his mind froze. Again. "Sooooo... Physics. Physics, physics, physics. Physics."

Dammit.

Though, he did note that a couple of boys really seemed to appreciate that he said that. One of them even pumped his fist. That was odd. "So, let's begin with a rundown of what you already know..."

And the class continued on, running actually rather smoothly. The Doctor actually was quite enjoying himself, truth be told. With any luck, He'd be able to catch up with Derpy after class and she'd have something for him on the Nn'tok, and they'd be in 'n out within an hour. He didn't notice the girl with the fiery red hair in the back that watched him the whole lesson through, a shrewd expression on her face.

Chapter 3

"Well, that was only... mildly horrible," the Doctor said to himself as the students filed out. Luckily the physics themselves weren't too difficult--basically the subject was the same as back home, just without the added wrinkle of established, accepted magic. But he was never professor material. His desire impart knowledge upon others was sort of at odds with his ability to actually do so with any degree of effectiveness. He could ramble for ages on any given subject, but only a few select ponies could ever parse anything meaningful out of it--gods bless Derpy--and trying to slow himself down for a group of ordinary students? Maddening. Still, it was only an hour. He was able to survive an hour. The students did, too, from the looks of things. "At least that's over and now I can get down to..."

"Hello, Doctor," a sudden voice said from the classroom doorway, causing him to jump. He turned to see that the owner was a young girl who was clad in a leather jacket and who also had distinct, striking red hair with yellow streaks throughout. Something about her was definitely familiar. Very familiar. On the tip of his tongue familiar. She was in the class he just taught, wasn't she? But it was more than that. It was... Wait, did she just call him...?

"'Doctor?'" he said, putting on his most convincing (i.e. not very) act. "Now why would you call me 'Doctor?' 'Professor', maybe. Or even, ugh, 'Mister Turner.' But 'Doctor?' I know I'm brilliant but last I checked I didn't have the credentials."

"Oh, sure you do," the newcomer said with a smirk. "You are still carrying around that psychic paper, aren't you?" The Doctor's jaw dropped so suddenly he was surprised it didn't hit the floor, and the young woman laughed. "You don't recognize me, do you? I suppose that's understandable. New species, new face, and I was barely out of fillyhood the last time you saw me at the castle."

The Doctor's eyes narrowed as he scrutinized the girl in front of him. So she was an Equestrian native, eh? That red hair was really, really familiar, and she said he'd seen her at the castle? That sort of narrowed things down... And suddenly, he realized exactly who he was talking to. "Wait. Wait wait wait wait wait. Wait wait waitity wait wait. You're Sunset Shimmer? My Sunset Shimmer?"

"Well, I'm not your anything, but, yeah, I'm... woah!" Shimmer was suddenly yanked off her feet as the Doctor enveloped her in a grand old hug, the kind that pulled her off her feet and spun her around the room.

"Oh, it's great to see you!" the Doctor managed to say through the laughter.

"I, ah. I can tell," Shimmer said, her eyes spinning. "Could you... could you put me down... down please?"

"Oh, sorry. It's just... one day you were there, the next you weren't. Completely vanished, from the history books and everything, after June third, 988 C.R. And Little Tia wouldn't tell me anything. Not one word about it, even after a decade of pestering. Always changing the subject, always asking me to 'just drop it.' Right. Like that ever works. You know how snoopy I can be, but there wasn't any kind of evidence for me to find, either, and whatever happened was a real doozy. Perhaps even bigger than that--maybe a slobberknocker--because the TARDIS just plain and simply refuses to take me there to see for myself. Lots of very powerful magics released that she doesn't like. So thanks to my two favorite girls, your fate's an even bigger secret than the secret behind her whole 'raising the sun' thing, and you know how much Little Tia enjoys hanging that one over my head. I mean, it's just... completely impossible, even taking magic into consideration. Planets orbit celestial bodies. That's just how it works but..."

Shimmer glanced away briefly, and the Doctor saw the shame in her expression, which caused him to drop the suddenly off-topic rant. "So she never talked about me? Somehow I'm not surprised."

"What...? No. No! You she talks about all the time. Well, not all the time. Sometimes. Mostly on lonely sort of nights where... never you mind. I think that's one of those privacy sort of things I'm still working on recognizing and respecting. The nights aren't so bad anymore, anyway, what with Luna's return and all. What she doesn't speak of is that specific day. The one where you disappeared. It's similar to how she used to shut out her battle with Nightmare Moon, now that I think on it. The difference being I was there for that one. The aftermath at least. The point here, and believe it or not I do have one, is that she loved you. And whatever it was that happened that day you disappeared didn't change that."

The sigh Sunset Shimmer made was surprising to the Doctor. "That... almost makes it worse."

"Oh? Care to share? Or is this one of those privacy things?"

She shrugged with another sigh. "Yes? No? I don't know. It's not a day that I'm proud of. I sorta started a... well it wasn't a coup exactly, at least I didn't think of it that way at the time. Your ship's right though. There was a lot of casting that day. Real dangerous stuff. Looking back on it, it was the childish tantrum of a young foal who just wasn't getting the lessons Princess Celestia was so desperately trying to impart."

"Aha!" the Doctor exclaimed. "I thought it was something like that." At the look on Sunset's face, he backpedaled. "Oh, sorry. It's just... well there's only a few things that make Tia clam up like that and one of them is, er, well... I'll... I'll stop talking, now."

"Please do," Sunset said with a playful smirk that didn't quite hide her pain. "I messed things up. I mean, I really messed things up. But I spent years, literal years, blaming everyone but me for my troubles. And then, when I finally figured out the secret to the portal--that secret being that it only opens at certain times, these times being years apart, mind--and managed to make my way home, what did I find? A purple little pony taking residence up in my room."

"Twilight Sparkle," the Doctor said with a thoughtful, almost blank expression on his face.

"Yeah. Twilight Sparkle. My replacement." Even Sunset seemed surprised at the venom in that last word, but she continued on. "I mean, I was gone--what?--half a decade, and she'd gone and replaced me? It usually takes centuries for her to take up new students. You know that better than anyone. And she replaced me in less than five years." Sunset closed her eyes and released a long breath to calm herself. "Of course, that's not exactly fair, is it? Huh, I didn't even know I was still so bitter about it 'till just now. I guess I've just... avoided thinking of it. Twilight and I're actually really good friends now, y'know."

"Actually I didn't." The Doctor couldn't help but grin a little.

"Right, but at the time, I well, snapped, basically. Started down a very long, very dark path, one that would have led to my own destruction and possibly the destruction of two worlds except..."

The Doctor waited a good four seconds for her to continue before he said, "Except...?"

The smile that was now on Sunset's face was small but surprisingly bright. "Well, except that Princess Twilight came over to this side to stop me. And when she did, I became friends with... heh... the girls." Here she reached into a pocket of her jacket, withdrew her smartphone, and held it up for the Doctor to see the screensaver.

The Doctor's first inclination was to marvel at the technology. Of course, it wasn't as if he hadn't seen similar, but it was certainly far away from what Equestria was capable of at the moment. But he then actually looked at the picture and couldn't help but chuckle. In the middle was Shimmer, a wide but slightly embarrassed smile on her face, and cramming into frame from all sides were five young girls that were unmistakable even as bipeds. There was just no mistaking those pink curls, or that freckled face under the Stetson hat, and there was certainly few who would forget that disheveled head of rainbow locks. The versions of these girls he knew back home were known as the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. Here, they were apparently just a group of high school girls. And from the sound of things they were still capable of great things.

Sunset chuckled. "Yeah, I thought you'd recognize them. I bet back home the history books have a lot to say about them, don't they?"

The Doctor joined in on the laughter. "Oh, you have no idea. Those five ponies, and Princess Sparkle, are among the most important of ponies in this current age. I daresay they do more for Equestria than Starswirl the Bearded did in his day."

"I'm not surprised," she said with a little nod. "They're certainly something special on this side of the mirror. So. Enough about me. What brings you here?"

"Oh, nothing much. Especially compared to my usual disasters. Just a non-malicious little pest that happens to carry a rather annoying psychic disease."

"Psychic?"

"Makes ponies irrationally angry for about forty eight hours. Probably people, too. Sooo... kinda need to find it quickly."

Sunset Shimmer's face paled slightly. "So what are you doing waiting around here then?"

"Well, I can't very well go snooping around without my companion and screwdriver, can I?" the Doctor said as he walked out into the hallway. "I'm betting both'll be back here aaaaany minute now." Sunset was about to ask what he meant by that when the Doctor was very nearly knocked over by a grey blur that launched itself into his chest.

"Hi, Doctor!" the suddenly arrived Derpy said as she gave the Doctor a big hug. "Didja miss me?"

"Always," the Doctor said with a smile. "So what did you find?"

"It's in the pipes. I've tracked it all over the school and it doesn't look like it's coming out any time soon."

"Wait a second," Shimmer said with a smirk. "She's your companion?"

"That's right," the Doctor responded, a jovial smirk of his own on his lips. "Is there something you find funny about that?"

"Well yeah, kinda." Turning to Derpy, Sunset added, "No offense."

"None taken."

Clearing his throat, the Doctor got down to business. "Now then, with the Nnn'Tok in the pipes, things are going to get a little dingy, but nothing I didn't already think of. We just need to AKK!"

This time the Doctor was knocked off his feet, from behind. "Ooops, my bad," a familiar voice said from atop his back.

"Quite all right, Der...py?" the Doctor said as he noticed something. Looking down on him, grins on their faces, were Sunset Shimmer and... Derpy. "Ohohoho no. Don't tell me you...?" He didn't need to finish his question as Shimmer helped up the newcomer off his back, and he saw that it was, indeed another Derpy. "Derpy, I thought we talked about this."

"What," his Derpy said with a shrug. "It was an accident."

"Besides," the other Derpy said in response. "We all know about the pony world anyway. What's the big deal?"

"And that's besides the point," the Doctor grumbled lamely as he got back to his feet.

Sunset grinned as she brought out her phone. "Well, if you're bringing in extra help anyway, I'm bringing in the girls."

The Doctor actually paled a little. "Don't even think about..."

"Too late. Already texted them. C'mon, we'll meet them out at the soccer fields."

"When did I lose control of this operation?" the Doctor groused as he was led away by the aggravating little redhead.

"Losing control implies you had control," Derpy--his Derpy, he was pretty sure--said in a lecturing tone.

"That was a rhetorical question," the Doctor groused.

"Yeah, and?"

As the group disappeared around a corner, another figure suddenly appeared standing in the hall as if he'd always been there. He was tall, dressed in an old brown suit that was nice once, but was now patched with a number of mismatched additions. His hair was long and grey, as was the beard he was stroking. From beneath an equally old and patched fedora hat, a pair of red eyes narrowed as a yellow-toothed smile appeared on the man's face. "Hoooo, ho ho ho ho. This place never fails to entertain."

With that, he snapped his fingers, and in a flash of light, completely disappeared.

Chapter 4

"So then, Sunset Shimmer joins in and starts singing too, right? And she changes too! And her color gets added to the rainbow, like, I dunno, a splash of sunlight or something. And the rainbow, it then turns into this... this unicorn with wings."

"Alicorn."

"Huh?"

"Unicorns with wings? They're called alicorns."

"Oh, so anyway..."

A few paces ahead, the Doctor chuckled, any lingering bad mood from Shimmer's co-opting this trip vanishing. Part of it was the actually rather fascinating story--he had been reasonably certain he knew all the big Twilight Sparkle stories, so hearing a new one was a pleasant surprise--but also, well, Derpy in stereo was surprisingly entertaining.

As the other Derpy was finishing up on the story of how the Sirens were defeated, the Doctor could just imagine the way his Derpy's eyes brightened. She loved a good Twilight Sparkle story, especially now that he let her in on the Princess Twilight Sparkle stories. Boy was that a difficult spoiler to keep quiet about. Worth it though, to see his Derpy genuinely surprised at something that happened in her lifetime in her back yard. "Wow," she said. "I guess that makes you a hero, Sunset."

Sunset's face flushed almost as red as her hair. The Doctor pretended not to notice. "Look, Derpy. I'm not a hero. Like, at all. Derpy... that is... Gha... She's not telling you everything. Not by a long shot."

The Derpys shared a glance before the Doctor's Derpy turned back to Sunset with a bit of a smirk. "Lemme guess? You used to be a big, mean, scary super villain, grrr, before Twilight Sparkle and her friends defeated you and made you their friend, and now you're a good girl just trying to make up for past mistakes."

Sunset Shimmer's jaw dropped. "How on Earth did you...?"

Derpy interrupted her with with a giggle. "Because that's just something that Twilight Sparkle does. The names, places, and plots are different, but the same story sorta kinda happens to her an average of one and a half times a year."

"For a timespan of decades," the Doctor interjected. "That filly was named Princess of Friendship for a reason."

Derpy was suddenly at Shimmer's side, an arm draped around her shoulder. "As somepony who personally knows quite a few of these past and future former baddies, lemme just say something, okay? What you used to be doesn't really matter. If you're a hero now, you're a hero, period."

Sunset sighed, but there was a small smile on her face. "If you say so."

Derpy sighed dramatically as she turned back to her counterpart. "Why are they always like that? Every hero I've ever met is always all like 'no I'm not a hero really I'm not,' blah, blah blah." At the Doctor's brief bark of a laugh, she turned to him in mock anger. "And you're the worst of the bunch!"

"Well, of course I am, and I have a legitimately, honestly, really very good reason." The Doctor's grin widened when Derpy said the next line right along with him. "I'm not a hero." The Doctor removed his hands from his pockets as he pointed a semi-accusing finger at his companion. "And what about you, eh? You're far more heroic than I could ever hope to be."

"Well, sure," Derpy agreed immediately. "But I'm more of a sidekick." She winked at Sunset, who couldn't help but laugh. "Twilight Sparkle's pretty bad, too. Every time you bring up one of the many, many times she's saved Equestria, she's bound to bring up that time the parasprites destroyed the town--which actually wasn't her fault, really--or the 'Want it Need it' thing--which, okay, yeah that one was kinda her fault, but you can't really blame her. She was, what, a week out from her first Discord battle. That kinda stuff does something to ya."

"'Discord?'" Sunset said, a brief look of confusion crossing her face. "As in, the concept of disharmony?"

"Heh. Something like that," Derpy laughed as she and Sunset exited out the double doors that would lead them to the soccer pitch, where the girls were apparently waiting for them.

The Doctor chuckled as he began to follow, but stopped when he noticed someone not joining him. "Well, come along, Other Derpy," he said to the hesitating teen.

The local Derpy's expression shifted from uncertain to a wonderfully familiar smirk of amusement. "Is that really what you're gonna call me?" She rolled her eyes as his grin got cheeky, then got uncertain again. "Do you really need me? I mean, you already got eep!" She started when the Doctor unexpectedly draped an arm over her shoulders.

"And she chose to let you get involved, despite the many, many lectures I've given her in the past about involving doubles in such things--not that I'm one to talk--and I trust her judgement."

"But we just sorta... ran into each other. By accident."

The Doctor loosed that one brief HA! that "Other" Derpy was beginning to notice he did rather often, before looking rather fondly at her. "My Derpy is really very smart, like I suspect you are. She could have found a way to get away from you or scare you off if she wanted. But she didn't. And I've learned the hard way--the remarkably, incredibly hard way--to trust her judgement. And what is this all of a sudden? You were quite gung-ho about this whole adventure a minute ago."

Other Derpy gave a sort of half-hearted shrug, her face getting a little pink due to the continued contact. "Yeah, but then I saw her and Sunset. I mean, I'm not... I can't... I mean, I'm all cross eyed, clumsy and different, and she's..."

"Equally cross eyed, clumsy, and different." The Doctor finally, mercifully removed his arm from around Derpy, and chuckled. "Yes, she is really quite confident, isn't she? Thing is, she wasn't so much when I met her, and she still does better with ponies outside her town and time zone than she does with the locals. The only difference between her and you is a decade or so of timey wimey travel. Now, are you coming along or not? Not to press, but we've got a bit of a timetable."

Other Derpy gave a rueful smirk. "Well, then, lay on, Macduff."

The Doctor was laughing again as he led Other Derpy out the door. No matter the 'verse, no matter the species, she was most definitely still his bubbly, brilliant, deceptively well-read Derpy.

Moments later, the two caught up with Derpy and Sunset, who were now in the middle of the school soccer field with a new group of girls. "What kept you?" his Derpy whispered when they caught up.

"You did," he whispered back with a smirk.

"Omigosh, Sunny you were right, there are two of 'em!" the unmistakable Pinky Pie squealed when she caught sight of Other Derpy, who gave a small grin at the attention. "So you're the Doctor, huh? So'zzat mean you travel around in a bigger-on-the inside blue box thingie forwards backwards and all around through time and the Derpy of your world is your ever faithful companion who gets kidnapped a lot but keeps you grounded and motivated to save the day and all that?"

The Doctor, who it bears reminding was normally very articulate and verbose, could only say, "Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh." His Derpy punched him in the arm, and he instantly returned to his usual self. "Yes, Pinky. That's me," The bubbly pink girl gave a little squee of joy at being proven right, and the Doctor gave the other girls a quick sweep.

Rarity was admiring him with that look girls sometimes gave him these days, though she was trying to be coy about it. Applejack seemed unimpressed, and Fluttershy seemed to be somehow trying to hide her face behind her pretty pink hair, all expected reactions. Meanwhile Rainbow Dash seemed to be staring at him, despite her best efforts not to. It was almost like what he knew of her early meetings with the Wonderbolts, or Daring Do (though to be fair, even the Doctor was pleasantly surprised to learn she wasn't fiction). There was definite recognition there, and though he was honestly not over surprised about Pinky Pie knowing exactly who he was at first sight (not the first time, after all), this was a little strange.

"Y'mind tellin' us what this's all about?" Applejack asked. No nonsense like usual.

"Right, yes, certainly. 'This' is all about an inter-dimensional pest that we may have accidentally chased through Princess Twilight's portal thing. Long story short, bad things may happen if we don't find it and flush it out, though it's not itself malicious in nature. Think of it as an extra-dimensional rat. Now let's see here..." The Doctor suddenly sat down right in the middle of the grass, cross-legged, and began emptying out his pockets, to the surprised stare of seven of the eight girls surrounding him as the pile of miscellaneous junk and gadgets continued to grow. "Hmmm... looks like I have enough spare parts and tools here to make... three tracking devices to distribute out, and I should be able to add a little sonic to them to help herd the little thing if necessary. With my own sonic added to the mix," and here he withdrew said tool from his jacket and began getting to work, "that will allow us to split up into four groups. Perfect for casing a building the size of your school." He cast an enthusiastic smile at Sunset. "I suppose calling 'the girls' was the right play, after all."

"Told you."

"No comic downloaders this time," his Derpy reprimanded. "Or music players. And please try not to have it cook anything it's not supposed to this time..."

"Yes, mum," the Doctor muttered, his mind not exactly on his work. Rainbow Dash was not the first person to recognize him who shouldn't have. The Doctor was certain he saw some form of recognition if a couple of students at the class earlier. And come to think of it, cross-dimensional species change notwithstanding, was the Doctor wearing his current face last he saw Sunset? Something odd was going on here, and it had nothing to do with extra-dimensional pests, dimensional doubles, or suddenly solved unsolved mysteries.

He and Sunset Shimmer were due a little talk.

Chapter 5

"Theeeere we go. Et viola!" the Doctor said with a flourish as he set the final completed tracker on the ground in front of him. Quite brilliant little devices if he said so himself. Looking up from his seat on the pitch, he could tell the girls didn't quite share his enthusiasm.

"Er, y'mind tellin' me what we're lookin' at?" Applejack asked.

"What?" the Doctor responded, gesturing to his devices. "They're Nnn'tok trackers. They..."

"Lemme guess!" Derpy with a smile. "They ding when there's Nnn'toks?" Other Derpy chuckled at that.

The Doctor gave an exaggerated sigh before deadpanning, "Yes, Derpy. They ding when there's Nnn'toks." Here he grabbed the tracker that looked vaguely like the controller for a fishing arcade game. "Derpy and Other Derpy." Derpy grabbed the device and the two of them fist-bumped (an action which somehow knocked them both over, to the Doctor's amusement) Then he grabbed one that started life as a supermarket price gun. "Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack." AJ took this one. The final one looked much like a fishing rod turned metal detector. "Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie." Dash took this one before Pinkie could. The Doctor spun his sonic around his fingers. "That just leaves the Doctor and Sunset Shimmer."

"So, once we've located this particular... creature," Rarity asked, "what exactly are we to do with it?"

"Yes, well, Nnn'toks don't much care for high frequency sonics," the Doctor explained. "So each of your trackers have a button on them to activate just that. You can use it to lure the Nnn'tok to... oh wait a tic." Here he produced from his pockets four cages, about the proper size for a large sized rat. "There. You can lure them into these."

There was a brief silence, then Rainbow Dash asked what they were all thinking. "Uh, Doc? Even forgetting that you pockets are..."

"Bigger on the inside!" Pinkie interrupted.

"Why do you have cages in them?"

"Oh, those're from the Great Parasprite Infestation of 3012, aren't they?" Derpy asked.

The Doctor nodded. "Exactly. It's a long story, and you're probably right, Miss Dash. It's probably time I cleaned my pockets out. But let's not ask about whys and wherefores and just use our available tools to catch the little guy before he can cause any trouble."

"Fair 'nuff," Dash agreed. "Me 'n Pinks'll start out on the fields. She's scarily familiar with the bushes around here."

"Gotta hide the eyepatches somewhere!" Pinkie added with a smile.

"Ah s'pose we'll check out the other side of the grounds," Applejack said. "There're some critters that Flutters'll be able to get some help from." Fluttershy herself didn't say anything--something that neither surprised nor offended the Doctor--but she did nod with a little smile that exuded a quiet confidence.

"Excellent," the Doctor agreed. "Two teams outside, two teams inside. I assume the actual administrative offices are on the ground floor?"

"By and large," Rarity said. "There is a small break room with some vending machines for the teachers upstairs to use between classes, but that is about it. I take it you and Sunset will be taking the ground floor?"

"Well I am a 'teacher' after all. It's a bit easier for me to get to those places than you can. Unless one of you plans on catching detention for the sake of our search?"

"Only if absotootly necessary," Pinkie piped up as she dragged Rainbow Dash away. "C'mon, Dashie. Those bushes aren't gonna search themselves!"

"We should be off ourselves," Rarity huffed. "The sooner we find the little..." she cast a glance at Fluttershy, who was looking at her with the slightest bit of annoyance. "...darling, the better."

The Doctor stood up and brushed himself off with a grin aimed at Sunset. "Good. Excellent. The girls are searching outside, the Derpy's have the upper floors, and that leaves us with the ground floor. A nice, simple, easy plan."

"Which means it's somehow bound to fall apart horribly," Derpy said with a grin of her own.

"Oh, absolutely," the Doctor agreed.

"Why are the two of you so happy about that?" Other Derpy asked.

Derpy chuckled. "That's when the fun starts. You'll see." and with that the two blonde girls went running for the school.

Sunset gave the Doctor a rather severe look, complete with the crossed arms and everything. "And you paired yourself off with me because..."

"Would you believe 'professional curiosity?"

Sunset shook her head with a grin. "I might, if you were the least bit professional."

"Oh, you cut me to the quick, miss Shimmer," the Doctor said dramatically, a hand over one of his hearts. "Though, admittedly, the last time I tried to use the Psychic Paper to convince someone I was professional, the darn thing fritzed out for a week."

Sunset chuckled as the group started back for the school building. "Something's bothering you, isn't it? You've got questions."

No point in denying it. The Doctor shrugged. "That I do."

"As do I," another voice said, as the door to the school opened, revealing a dark blue woman, dressed professionally. "Vice Principal Luna," she introduced herself. "I take it you are Mr. Time Turner, the substitute teacher?"

The Doctor was actually quite surprised, but slid right to "all charm and smiles" without missing a beat. "That is correct, Miss Luna. To what do I have the honor?"

Luna leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, a smirk on her lips. "For one, I don't believe for a minute you're actually a teacher."

"Your sister did," the Doctor replied, almost keeping the petulant pout out of his voice.

"My sister is a very intelligent woman, but even in light of recent... events, her imagination at times leaves something to be desired." Luna held a hand out, palm up. "May I?"

Here the Doctor produced his open wallet and handed it to the Vice Principal. She looked it over and her smile widened. "'The Doctor,' Real name: 'question, question, question,' birthplace..." Her expression changed, one eyebrow raised. "'Gallopfrey.' You're from the other side of the portal, aren't you?"

"Whuaaat? Portal? No. N-No! I couldn't, what are you evennnnyes. Yes. Yes I am." The Doctor turned to Sunset and groused, "Does everyone here know about the portal?"

"Pretty much," Sunset said with a grin. "My demonic freak out was kind of... nuclear."

"My sister is aware as well, but, as I said, she can lack imagination. She needed a substitute, a man was there with a magic paper that confirms him as a substitute, she's going to think he's a substitute." The Doctor could hear just a little bit of smugness in Luna's voice. Friendly but constant competition, much like at home. Suddenly Luna got very serious. "Is the event that brought you here something I should know about? The school's been rebuilt twice in the last year, and I'd hope to avoid that now."

The Doctor sighed as he took his Psychic Paper back. "With luck you and your students won't even notice anything amiss." Luna continued to glare. "If thing do go bad, we'll be sure to come to you first. Fair enough?" Luna cast a look at Sunset Shimmer, who shrugged.

"Fine. I'll trust you, Doctor," Luna said with a sigh. "But if things start getting out of hand, I expect to be informed straight away."

The Doctor hmm'ed distractedly. He was looking at the Psychic Paper, calling up its last illusion. Sure enough, it was a very convincing looking identification card, with a photo of his current transformed appearance, but the information was actually true. That was something that could only be accomplished by someone very intelligent (Okay, fine. Check), and if they were aware of Psychic Paper and what it did.

"How did...?" he started, looking up. Luna was gone. "I hate it when she does that."

Sunset had to laugh. "She likes to to that when patrolling the halls, too. Absolutely terrifying."

The Doctor pocketed his wallet with one hand as he produced his sonic screwdriver with the other. "That little encounter just added more questions to my list as I'm sure you've already figured. But first thing first, let's get rid of our little pest."

The poster distracted him. He couldn't help it, it was a distinctly more colorful poster than anything else on the poster board. It was only about an upcoming sports festival, so he was going to ignore it. Then he saw the opposing school was "Crystal Prep," and easily recognized the picture of this universe's Princess Cadance and found himself really interested. Alternate universes. Always surprising. Then a yellow hand appeared right before his eyes and snapped, drawing his attention back to its owner. "Sorry about that, Sunset. My attention span's a little short these days."

"Yeah, right. These days," Sunset said with a knowing smirk. "Your sonic is blinking."

"Ah, so it is," he said, pointing the tool across the currently abandoned cafeteria to the source of the signal. The kitchens, of course. "Looks like I'm going solo for now. Unless they let students into the kitchens in this universe."

Sunset sat at one of the tables. "Not likely. Go on. I'll wait for you here."

And he was off, already pulling out his Psychic Paper wallet. Then her phone chimed and she pulled up her texts.

FOUND IT!!! in pink text and hearts.

chasin the varmit now. Yellow text.

gOt ti. Gray, this time.

"Wait, wha...?" Before she could even piece the thought together the Doctor was returning, pleased as punch and with something in his cage. He was completely ignoring the shocked, angry, and scandalized looks the kitchen staff were shooting him.

"What do you know?" he said. "The plan actually worked. And without a hitch for once." Here he showed her his catch. It actually did look much like a rat, but without ears, and it was a deep purple with green polkadots.

"Yeah, about that. You said there was only one of these things, right?"

"Yes I did. Why?"

"Do they, I dunno, explosively breed?"

"They can, but if that was the case I'd find this one with her litter. Again, why?" The Doctor didn't like where this was going.

Sunset showed him the texts. "Then I think we've got a problem."

Chapter 6

Four.

Four Nnn'toks.

There were four Nnn'toks.

Ah, ah, ah.

The Doctor shook his head. Did he say that aloud? He actually wasn't sure on that, but given the smirk his Derpy was shooting him, and his known propensity for gab, probably. Just once he'd like to look cool in front of a new group of people Ah, well.

They were back at the Football (oh, yeah. They call it Soccer here) pitch, and there were four pest cages, each with an Nnn'tok within. They certainly didn't happen as a result of breeding -- at least not here -- and as near as the Doctor could tell, they were actually the same age. The Doctor also knew for a fact that there was only one Nnn'tok in Ponyville, and that was the Nnn'tok that escaped to this dimension.

The Doctor crouched down next to the cages, and picked them up one at a time to inspect the creatures. "Curiouser and curiouser." They were all the same age, but there was something else about them. Something he was pretty sure he could see, but just to be on the safe side... "Fluttershy, if you would?"

The young girl in question almost seemed to jump out of her skin, before pointing at herself. "M-me?"

The Doctor gestured rather impatiently for her to get down by him. "Yes, you. You are the animal one, aren't you? Pretty sure you are, unless I've got you confused for someone else and I don't think I do."

Fluttershy crouched down next to the Doctor. "But, er, Mr. Doctor, ah, sir? Aren't the Nnn'toks aliens? I don't really... know anything about aliens."

The Doctor shrugged and flashed a grin. "You'd be surprised, actually. In a lot of cases, animals are animals. In this case in particular, apart from their differently developed psionic brains, Nnn'toks are not overly different than most rats or mice in your world. At least so I would imagine given the various differences and similarities between here and back home." The Doctor gestured to the cages. "There's something here I think I'm seeing, but juuuust in case, I'm asking for a second opinion. See anything off about these creatures?"

Fluttershy cast one last doubtful glance at the Doctor before looking at the Nnn'tok's more closely. "If they really are like mice and rats... they're all the same age as each other, possibly from the same litter... wait a minute." Fluttershy picked each cage up, one at a time, and spent at least a minute looking at each one. The Doctor and his Derpy shared a grin. Some things didn't change, no matter the universe.

"They're identical," Fluttershy finally said as she put the last cage down.

"Well, yeah," Applejack replied. "Y'said they looked like littermates, right?"

Fluttershy shook her head. "No, I mean they're identical. Right down to spot pattern on their coats. That's just not possible, even for twins and triplets. Er, I mean, you know. In theory."

"Just as I thought," the Doctor almost whooped with a grin. "Miss Shimmer, could I borrow your mobile for a moment?"

Sunset passed her phone over almost automatically. It wasn't until he had it in hand she thought to ask "I am getting it back as it was, right?"

"Mmm-hmm. Oh yes, of course," the Doctor said even as he pointed the sonic at the back of the phone. Sunset cast a somewhat desperate glance at the Derpys, one of whom looked as nervous as she suddenly felt, the other giving her a little shrug and sheepish grin.

"Why did I do that?" Sunset whispered. "I mean, I didn't even think about it 'till it was too late."

"He kinda has that effect on ponies, er, people," Derpy responded. "I still fall for it and I know better."

"Ah-HA!" exclaimed the Doctor as he finished whatever it was he was doing to Sunset's phone. (Sunset herself shuddered at the tangle mess of wires and metal bits that were now attached to the back of the thing.) Then he started taking pictures of the captured Nnn'toks, after which he plopped down on the ground, legs crossed, and started tapping commands into the phone's screen.

"Mind telling us what you're doing there, chief?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Following a hunch," was all the Doctor would say. After around thirty seconds he sighed, pointed his sonic at the back of the phone, which caused all the added machinery to fall off the back of it (he pocketed these), then tossed the apparently restored phone back to Sunset as he stood up.

"Find anything?" his Derpy asked, putting an arm around his waist.

"Naturally," the Doctor answered, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Thanks for letting me borrow that, by the way, Sunset. I needed a little more than a 'dings when there's stuff' device and your mobile saved me hours of work."

"Well, don't just leave us hangin', Doc," AJ insisted.

Suddenly Pinkie Pie was right up in the Doctor's face. "Yeah! Whadidyafind,whadidyafind,whadidyafind?"

"Well," the Doctor said, pushing Pinkie away from himself, "I checked the Nnn'toks' molecular makeup, and that one's made of bubble gum ice cream, that one's made of coffee--an espresso I'd guess given the caffeine content--that one's made of brussel sprouts, and that one is," another sigh, "cotton candy."

His Derpy seemed to try to hide her entire face in her hand. "Ah, geez."

"Okay, that is really weird," Other Derpy said. "But what does it mean?"

The Doctor ignored her as he turned away from the group of girls and shouted out to the open field. "All right, you might as well show yourself. I know its you."

A sudden, seemingly ownerless voice answered back. "You know, I was just about to make a big grand entrance, but now I'm reconsidering it. It's no fun when they know you're coming." The voice turned sly and teasing when it added, "And besides, you've got that 'otherworldly wrath' look on your face, and last time I saw it, I got turned to stone. Again."

"Please. I'm mildly irritated at best. Now, if you don't show yourself, then I might get well and truly--what did you call it?--wrathful."

A black cane suddenly appeared out of thin air, its golden unicorn head-topper pointing at the Doctor's face. "Are you threatening me, sirrah?" the voice asked, still not coming from any particular direction.

The Doctor shrugged. "I don't threaten. I say what's going to happen, then back it up. As you know full well."

The voice laughed as the cane stuck itself into the ground (where it made a rather disturbing sound, like it impaled a goose.) "That's what I love about you, Doctor. Your mastery of banter." At this, a gloved hand appeared and grabbed at a spot about six feet above the ground, then pulled down and with a loud zzzzzzip a man suddenly appeared.

He was tall, skinny, and rather old. He wore a suit in the cut of a tuxedo, but it was worn, and had enough patches to make it a veritable rainbow of colors, with a focus on various browns and light blues. He looked to be rather old, with a long grey goatee. Despite his red eyes, he had a surprisingly friendly face. "Why hello, girls," he said, taking his top hat off his head as he bowed with flourish.

The Doctor rolled his eyes as he turned back to the group of girls. "Derpy, Derpy, and the rest, I present to you... Discord."

Chapter 7

Author's Notes:

So, I'm not dead. And neither are my fics, though I may have bit off more than I can chew with "Time Keeps Wibbling On," I am horribly behind on the show -- I've not been watching shows in general, really, the last couple years -- which has affected my writing drive a bit, admittedly, but I am still here.

It has been so long that a quick reminder of the timeframe may be in order. So, while my Doctor's history isn't quite the same as the canon one, he is still the Tenth Doctor, with roughly the same experiences (as an example, "his" Daleks are still the brassy ones, and he may or may not be aware that Davros is still alive out there), Equestria is just shortly after the battle with Tirek, so Discord's reformation is set in stone, but he's still got a few things to learn. And the Equestria Girls universe hasn't yet had the Friendship Games, so they haven't met SciTwi yet.

Discord laughed as he put the hat back on his head. "It's not quite as good as what I had in mind, but you do have a certain flair for introductions, Doctor."

"Aren't you supposed to be, I dunno, reformed or something these days?" the Doctor's Derpy accused. Discord smiled, and the Doctor -- who was actually quite familiar with Discord and his moods -- could tell it was one of his actually genuine smiles, not one of his look-at-how-genuine-I-am smiles.

"Still traveling with the Doctor and kicking gods in the face, eh?" With a shrug Discord began pacing a bit. "Yes, yes. I am in fact one of those one-and-a-half-per-year former baddies." As he spoke a teapot appeared in his left hand and a teacup in his right. He held the cup upside-down high above his head, and a stream of tea poured up from the pot into the cup. "First one of the big, world threatening ones, if I may be so bold." Here he stopped pouring the tea, made the pot disappear, and turned the cup rightside-up again, bringing it back down to face level. "Not counting my Loony Little Luna, of course. I maintain she doesn't count, given that she and Nightmare Moon were effectively different ponies. Hmm, a little too cold." Here he produced an ice cube, dropped it in the cup, and after a brief hssss, there was a noticeable plume of steam rising from the cup. The Doctor couldn't help but smirk at the little show he was putting on. "Though it would behoove students of history like yourselves to remember that the Princess isn't the only one who can pull those off." Here he offered the cup to Fluttershy, who cast a nervous glance at the Doctor -- who smiled and gave her a 'go ahead gesture -- before taking the offered cup and taking a sip. Her eyes widened and a small smile formed on her face.

"I trust I got it right?" Discord asked, his smile a gentile one generally reserved for but one other.

"Yes thank you."

Discord's smile turned to a grin. "That said, I'm betting you're wondering why I'm here, turning your little expedition into a wild goose chase."

"Omigosh, yes!" Derpy responded in exasperation.

Discord turned, one of his bushy eyebrows rising into his hat. "I'm surprised I annoy you so much. I'd have thought you'd find my... idiosyncrasies charming. I mean, the pony you travel with is at least as chaotic as I am."

The Doctor grinned at that. "True." he agreed. His grin widened as his Derpy glared at him. Other Derpy was smirking behind her back. "In fairness, though, Discord, do you remember what you actually put her through on your first trip to Ponyville?"

At that, Discord's cocky facade slipped just a little. "Actually, no. You must understand, I'd been trapped for a very long time, so I basically let the chaos do its own thing even more so than usual. I was only really focused on the Element Bearers. And even that was only until I thought I'd beaten them. Was it... particularly bad?" Derpy levied a rather scary glare at him -- it didn't come close to what he'd seen Luna do in the past, but not bad for a normal pony. "Huh. I don't suppose a sincere apology would suffice?"

Derpy seemed to get even more agitated. "Really?"

The Doctor couldn't help but bark out a laugh. "Oh, Discord. Discord, Discord, Discordy-Disco-doo. Even I can read the room better than that."

Discord actually looked a bit put out by that. "Honestly, I really don't see what the problem is, here. I would have thought you'd be thrilled at my little intervention."

Other Derpy put a hand on her counterpart's shoulder before she could respond with something she might regret later. "Why'd you think that?" she asked.

With a deadpan expression on his face, Discord caused a small record player to appear in the palm of his hand, complete with a brass bell-like horn for a speaker. He placed the needle on the vinyl record, then: "Good. Excellent. The girls are searching outside, the Derpy's have the upper floors, and that leaves us with the ground floor. A nice, simple, easy plan."

"Which means it's somehow bound to fall apart horribly."

"Oh, absolutely."

"Why are the two of you so happy about that?"

A chuckle. "That's when the fun starts. You'll see."

As all the girls' eyes turned to look at her, Derpy's face turned a red so deep it just started to tinge into purple. The Doctor, meanwhile, was sporting a rather toothy smile. "You don't get to say anything," Derpy said, a finger jabbed in his face.

"I don't believe I did say anything," The Doctor responded, with absolutely zero shame in his voice. "Nope. Not a peep out of me. Nor any other small woodland creature sound."

"Now, that's all well an' good," Applejack spoke up. "'Cept the rest of ain't the thrill seekers those two are. We ain't enjoyin' these... complications, that's f'r sure."

"I kinda am," Pinkie interrupted.

Rainbow Dash chuckled and draped an arm around Pinkie's shoulder. "Yeah, but Pinks? You're weird."

Pinkie seemed to put some deep thought into that, chin tapping and all. "Hmmm... True," she said, a small smile on her face.

"If you don't mind me asking," Rarity said, "why are you even here, in this world. You're clearly from the other side of the portal."

Discord nodded. "Very astute, Rarity. Very good. Yes, I'm not from around here. In fact, normally I look like this!" And for a moment, he transformed into his true draconnequus form, startling most of the girls (minus Pinkie, Fluttershy, and the Doctor's Derpy) to take a flinching step back at the sheer unnatural-ness of it. He the popped back into his human form, a mildly irritated frown on his face. "Something about this world doesn't like me taking that shape, though. It takes more concentration than it's worth to hold it. Anyway," and here he flipped into the air and hung there, upside-down, legs crossed and hands behind his head. "You can blame the Doctor for that, at least indirectly. We had a little dust-up a... hmm, it's actually difficult to put a time frame on it; I imagine it's like that a lot with you. Let's just say a while ago, that opened my eyes to a bigger world out there. Made me realize how actually kind of small Equestria really is. It didn't take long for me to discover the mirror that leads here. Took even less for me to circumvent the limitations on it, even before Twilight Sparkle figured it out. And this place is most enjoyable to observe. I mean, Sirens! I thought they'd gone extinct."

"So, wait," Sunset Shimmer said, "You were here, in this world during the thing with the Sirens, and you just... watched it happen?"

Discord just shrugged his shoulders at that. "Why would I need to do anything else? You already had Princess Sparkle and the girls working on the problem with you. I had faith the lot of you would succeed. Of course, not before giving me a good show first." He chuckled a little at that.

"Careful there, Discord," the Doctor said with a chuckle of his own. "You're starting to sound, dare I say it, sinister."

"Am I?" Once again Discord looked legitimately put out as he ran the last minute or so of conversation over in his head. "Apologies, I'm not exactly used to being one of the 'good guys.' Old habits do die hard."

"I don't exactly buy that ya are one a' the 'good guys,'" replied Applejack. "I mean, ya are keepin' us from stoppin' a potentially major problem from breakin' out at our school 'n all."

Discord flipped himself rightside up again. "You mean the little alien rat thing? You have nothing to worry about on that front. I have him right here," and with a snap, a dome shaped birdcage appeared, floating to his right, a purple spotted Nn'tok visible within. All the girls fell silent at that. "You can scan it with your devices if you'd like, Doctor. You'll find this one is indeed flesh and bone. So you see, Applejack, there is no threat to your school. I don't intend on making one, either. My intent is in fact to let you take this little fellow back where he belongs. Happy endings all around. All I ask is that you play one more little game with me. I promise it will be perfectly safe. Mostly safe. Relatively safe."

"So, let me get this straight," Sunset said. "You crossed the dimensional divide, or whatever, to a world where you can't even keep your own form, which I can tell irritates you, just to mess with the Doctor and have us... play a game? Why?"

Discord stroked his beard, an unreadable expression on his face. "You know what? That's fair. You don't know me, and I only know alternate versions of most of you. I suppose you would appreciate a straight answer. I guess I can give you one -- just this once and don't tell anybody. Now, I'm going to try to explain something that I suspect only the Doctor will have any inkling of, and only an inkling because he's only..." here he turned to the Doctor with a discerning eye. "Not quite a thousand years old? Maybe just barely there?" The Doctor just smirked and shrugged.

"In any case, you have to understand something about immortals, whether they be 'good' or 'bad.'" The quotations could practically be heard in his voice. "We just plain see things differently than you all do. And I've been quite literally the personification of chaos for eons. Plural. And literal. I've utterly and completely lost track of how old I am around eon...3, I think. And now... now I've given up on the whole 'Lord of Chaos' thing. And yet, in a very, very real way I still am Chaos. So I hope you can appreciate where I'm coming from when I say that sometimes? I just get so bored." Here Discord sort of collapsed, dangling in the air like a marionette for a moment to stress his point.

"You're here because you're bored?" Rarity asked. "Are you serious?"

"No, no, I get it," Pinkie Pie said with a sage nod.

"As do I," the Doctor agreed.

Derpy reluctantly nodded with a shrug. "Sure. Me, too."

Discord grinned, even as the other girls tried not to gawk at the more nutty ones of their group. "Look, how about this?" He snapped his fingers again, and suddenly the sky darkened just a little, and the sun moved from it's current position to near sunset. "We're now entering early evening. Everyone's gone home. No one to get in the way or possibly get hurt. Okay, maybe your loony little Vice Principal is still here. She's a nocturnal one no matter the universe. But still, I've more or less cleared the play field for you." At the lack of response, Discord floated back down to the ground, another put-upon frown on his face. "Look, I'm really bending over backwards here for you." And here he did so, his head burying itself into the ground, the popping up out of the ground in front of himself. "Would it kill you to throw me a bone, here?"

The Doctor's smirk was threatening to tear his face in half as he gestured to the rest of the group. "Come on, huddle up. Don't you listen in, Discord."

"Who, me?" Discord asked, as a halo appeared over his head (which was still sticking out of the ground.).

"So, not going to mince words, I think we should play his game," the Doctor said.

With the exception of the Derpy's and Pinkie, the girls all simultaneously said "What."

"Look, most of you don't know him the way I do. He's actually being quite reasonable, by his standards. Especially for the current time frame. He's already done the work for us, and all we have to do is entertain him for a little while -- possibly lose a little dignity, but that's all. So I say we do it."

"You do realize, he is basically holding the Nn'tok, and by extension the school, hostage, right?" Sunset asked.

"Hmm, yes. I suppose I'll have to have a talk with him about good form. Don't laugh, Derpy. I do understand good form, even if I choose to ignore it. But here's the question: what other options do we have?" Here there was silence. "Look, you've all seen what he can do, he's not been exactly subtle about how powerful he is. We don't really have any chance of beating him in anything resembling a direct fight. I've defeated him once, but it was under some astronomically specific, very timey-wimey circumstances. Now, all he is asking, is that we give him a little bit of our time and possibly embarrass ourselves for our amusement. So, what sounds better? A little time and dignity, or risk offending him by refusing, knowing how powerful he is?"

The discussion did go a few minutes longer -- Rarity in particular was rather reluctant, unsurprisingly -- but the Doctor could tell that he'd already won the argument. Once all the girls finally were in accord, the Doctor turned to Discord and said, "All right, we're in. What is this game you're proposing?"

Discord's face lit up with such delight that the Doctor felt both a surge of both satisfaction and dread at the same time. Discord never quite lost the ability to instill such conflicting emotions in a pony-slash-person. He pulled himself back up to a proper standing position. "It's actually quite simple. I've released another group of creatures on the school grounds. You lot just have to go catch them again. But this time -- this time, I've added some... surprises to make catching them more interesting."

"That's it? Catch some more Nn'toks?" Other Derpy asked, slightly confused.

"That's it." Discord confirmed. "But I feel I must stress -- it's going to be much more entertaining this time."

The Doctor turned back to the group. "I suppose for the sake of simplicity, we should take the same groups to the same places. Is that okay with you, Discord?" Discord nodded. "Soooo... break, I guess." And at that the group dispersed, though the Doctor and Sunset stayed behind for a brief moment more. The Doctor turned serious for a moment as he turned to Discord. "When this is over, you and I will have to have a serious talk."

Discord just grinned. "You're welcome."

Though she didn't say anything, Sunset couldn't help but notice that the Doctor was grinning, as well, as he turned back to the school building.