Author's Notes:

Well look at you! You made that look easy!

Too easy.

You think you understand how to bend the rules of this world to suit yourself? Don’t kid yourself; there’s no way you’ll stay on this path the whole way. Not after you see how the world really is. But go ahead; it’ll be fun to see how far you get before you break. And since you only get one shot at it…

Kehehahaha!

For a brief moment after stepping through the Ruins exit, Diamond Tiara thought she had escaped the underground entirely, and that Winter had somehow come already. Snow covered the ground and tall black trees lined the path forward thickly on either side, but when she looked up she saw that the trees were brushing against a rock ceiling studded with twinkling crystals which cast the whole, enormous cavern in perpetual twilight. The Filly’s disappointment was quickly swallowed up as she heard movement within the trees and she remembered Toriel’s warning that something nearby probably wished her dead. She briefly considered going back into the Ruins, but stopped herself with a determined snort.

“I refuse to be afraid,” she said loudly, and set off down the path at what she hoped looked like a confident trot. The path went on and on with no turns or change to the screening trees on either side. Every so often, a sound came from the trees, but nothing jumped out to attack her. After a short while, she saw a black stick lying across the road and decided to pick it up and carry it in her mouth.

The stick made her feel a little more confident about facing whatever might be stalking her, until she’d gone a few feet and heard a voice behind her ask, “What happened to my stick?” Diamond Tiara whirled around, but saw nothing on the path behind her. After looking around for a moment, she whirled back around, saw that nothing had snuck up while her back was turned, and started trotting again, a little faster. Eventually, she saw some kind of structure in the distance, and at the same time felt something watching her. When she stopped and looked around, she still saw nothing, but the feeling of another presence nearby didn’t go away. Diamond Tiara gulped and broke into a run toward the structure, which she soon saw resembled wooden arches built over a bridge across a short gap.

Just before the Filly reached the bridge, something suddenly appeared behind her and said, “Hold it right there. Don’t move.” Diamond Tiara bit hard onto her stick as she fought the urge to run screaming. “Before you turn around,” the voice, deep and rattling, said, “I have one question. Does the name ‘Frisk’ mean anything to you?”

“N-no…?” Diamond Tiara answered.

“You sure?” The Filly nodded, and something seemed to change in the presence behind her; it no longer felt menacing. “Alright then,” it rattled, “now turn around and give your new friend a handshake. Or hoofshake in your case.”

New friend? Diamond Tiara thought in bemusement even as she turned around to comply. She closed her eyes before getting a good look at the figure and reached a hoof out to what she thought was its proffered hand.

Pffffft. Bllllr…

Diamond Tiara’s eyes popped open at the unexpected sound and stared into the white, grinning face of a bipedal skeleton about half a head taller than her wearing a blue hoodie and black shorts. Blue lights glowed in the skeleton’s eyes as it spoke in a chuckling rattle. “the old whoopee cushion in the hand prank. a classic, don’t you think?” It returned its hand to its hoodie pocket. “i’m sans, sans the skeleton. nice to meet you.”

“Um, nice to meet you, I think?” Diamond Tiara said. “I’m Diamond Tiara… the pony.”

“nice name,” Sans said, “very fancy.”

“Thank you,” the Filly said proudly. “So, why were you following me?”

Sans shrugged. “just doin’ my job, guarding the door to the ruins and dealing with anyone who comes out.” Diamond Tiara gasped and backed away from the skeleton until she stood on the other side of the bridge and tried to brandish her stick. “calm down, kid,” Sans said, holding his hands up, “i don’t mean you any harm. we do need to have a long chat, though, about how your being here is going to affect things.” He put his hands back in his pockets and walked across the bridge. Diamond Tiara moved aside to put space between her and the skeleton, and Sans walked by without comment. He stopped after a few feet and looked back. “you don’t want to have the talk here, do you?” he asked. “it’s cold, there’s nothing to eat for miles, and you haven’t met my brother yet.”

“Brother?’ Diamond Tiara asked.

“yep, i think you’ll like him. he’s-”

“SANS!!!”

“he’s coming right now.” A skeleton twice Sans’s height wearing a short white shirt with big shoulders, blue hotpants, orange boots, orange gloves, and a short orange cape tied bandana-style around its neck came running down the path ahead and stopped a few feet short of Sans. “sup, bro?” Sans asked.

“YOU KNOW WHAT’S ‘SUP,’ BROTHER!” The taller skeleton’s bone-rattle voice seemed to be set permanently to “loud exuberance.” “IT’S BEEN EIGHT DAYS AND YOU STILL HAVEN’T RECALIBRATED. YOUR. PUZZLES! YOU JUST STAND AROUND OUTSIDE YOUR STATION. WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING?”

“making a new friend,” Sans replied casually.

“WHAT?” the taller skeleton asked.

“right back there,” Sans said, pointing over his shoulder with a thumb at Diamond Tiara. “want to meet her?”

“I…” the other skeleton hesitated and glanced aside. “NO, I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THAT!! WHAT IF A HUMAN COMES THROUGH HERE?!”

“bro, is something wrong?” Sans looked taken aback, but didn’t say anything as his brother continued his tirade. “I MUST BE READY!!! I WILL BE THE ONE! I MUST BE THE ONE!!! I WILL CAPTURE A HUMAN! THEN I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL GET ALL THE THINGS I UTTERLY DESERVE!”

“if you say so,” Sans cut in, “but there won’t be any humans today, papyrus.”

“WHAT MAKES YOU SO SURE, SANS?!” Papyrus asked, glaring.

Sans pointed to Diamond Tiara again. “well, the little pony there just came out of the ruins, and she didn’t see any humans.”

“OH,” Papyrus looked disappointed. He then crossed his arms and turned his head to the side aloofly. “VERY WELL THEN, I GUESS THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS A LITTLE TIME TO SPARE TO… MAKE A FRIEND?”

Diamond Tiara heard a tone of wistfulness enter Papyrus’s loud voice in his last few words. As she examined the tall skeleton’s behavior more, she recognized something familiar about it that she couldn’t quite put her hoof on. That feeling was enough to dampen the last of her nervousness about Sans, so she put her stick down and approached the skeleton brothers. “Hello,” she said, but before she could get another word out, Papyrus burst forth with more enthusiastic yelling.

“GREETINGS, PONY! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, UNDERSTAND YOU WISH TO BE ONE OF MY FRIENDS. IT’S OBVIOUS WHY, SINCE I AM SO GREAT AND POSSESS MANY ADMIRABLE TRAITS. HOWEVER, I AM A SKELETON OF STANDARDS, AND I MUST MAKE SURE YOU CAN MEET THEM!!” He seemed about to continued, but then hesitated and looked at Sans. “SANS,” he said in what for him probably constituted a whisper, “UH, COULD YOU GIVE ME A HAND?”

“sure thing,” Sans said, and then started to applaud. Papyrus’s eye-sockets actually narrowed in annoyance.

“CUT THAT OUT!” he snapped. “I SWEAR, YOU NEVER TAKE ANYTHING SERIOUSLY!!”

“sorry,” Sans said with an exaggerated shrug, “but you know i can’t pass up chance to be a little… humerus.”

“UGH!” Papyrus face-palmed. “NEVER MIND; I’LL JUST… WAIT! I JUST HAD AN IDEA!! NYEH HEH HEH!!” He spun around and dashed away in a flurry of kicked-up snow.

Sans and Diamond Tiara stared at the retreating figure for a couple minutes. “well, that’s papyrus,” Sans said at last. “what do you think?”

Diamond Tiara smirked. “He acts like he doesn’t have a single calm bone in his body,” she said.

Sans gave her a sideways look. “bone humor? heh. not bad for a first try. anyway, we should probably head into town now. just keep going straight ahead; it’s hard to get lost.” He started to walk away back toward the Ruins, but stopped where the Filly had dropped the stick and picked it up. “hey, you should probably take this with you. there are more sentries on the road up ahead. they’re good guys, but they can be a bit… excitable. keeping a stick on hand will be good if you can’t get by any other way.”

“How’s a stick going to help?” Diamond Tiara asked.

“do you have dogs where you come from?” Sans asked. Diamond Tiara nodded. Sans tossed the stick to her and said, “then you already know the answer. see you up ahead.” He walked across the short bridge and disappeared into the thick trees. Diamond Tiara wrangled the stick into her bag and set off in the direction Papyrus had gone.

The tall black trees quickly gave way to shorter, friendly-looking pines covered in snow, and the path forked. The left path just led to a river where someone had left a fishing pole stuck in the ground with its line cast into the water, so Diamond Tiara took the right path. Up ahead she saw Papyrus and, to her surprise, Sans having a conversation. The skeletons stopped what they were saying as the Filly approached, and Papyrus rested one hand on his hip in a jaunty manner. “PONY!!” he declared, “LISTEN WELL! IF YOU WISH TO BE MY FRIEND, I HAVE A TASK FOR YOU. UP AHEAD ARE SEVERAL PUZZLES PUT TOGETHER BY MY BROTHER AND I TO CHALLENGE AND CAPTURE HUMANS!! TAKE ON A FEW OF THESE PUZZLES AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF THEM, AND THEN I WILL CONSIDER BEING YOUR… FRIEND!!” The skeleton’s bone-rattle voice somehow gained a gleeful squeak on the last word, and Diamond Tiara thought she saw sparkles forming inside Papyrus’s eye sockets before he caught himself and regained his dramatic aloofness. “MAYBE,” he added. The Filly smirked as she realized what lay below the skeleton’s projected persona.

“Ok,” she said affably. “Sounds like fun.”

“NYEH HEH HEH!” Papyrus laughed. “GREAT! LET’S GET STARTED THEN! SANS!! COME HELP ME SET UP!” He dashed away in another flurry of snow, but Sans stayed put, leaning against a tree with his hands in his pockets.

“thanks for playing along,” the short skeleton said to Diamond Tiara. “he seems like he’s enjoying himself, even though you’re not a human.”

“What’s the big deal with these human things anyway?” Diamond Tiara asked. “and what the hay is a human in the first place?”

Sans gave the Filly a sideways look. “let’s just say for now that capturing a human is papyrus’s ticket into the royal guard. as to what a human is,” he spread his arms wide and winked, “imagine me with skin and muscle, and not made of magic.”

“SANS!” Papyrus’s voice echoed from up ahead, “STOP BOONDOGGLING AND GET YOUR LAZY BONES OVER HERE!”

Sans chuckled. “well,” he said, “you heard him. after you, kiddo.” He remained leaning against the tree as Diamond Tiara set off down the path again, but the Filly suspected she’d find him up ahead of her again, eventually.

A little ways ahead, Diamond Tiara saw a tiny roofed stand tucked into a gap in the trees to the side of the road. Just before the stand was a sign that read “Absolutely no moving!” The Filly was puzzled about the sign until she stepped in front of the stand and a black-and-white dog-like monster with shifty eyes, wearing an absurdly pink shirt and polka-dot pants, a bone-shaped dog treat in its mouth, and holding a pair of short swords in its front paws popped up from behind the counter, and Diamond Tiara quickly decided to take the sign’s advice.

“Did something move?” the dog asked. “I can only see moving things. If something was moving…” It hopped over the counter, looking around wildly. “Like, for example, a human…” Diamond Tiara’s heart started to pump hard and her vision blurred as the dog approached, swords raised threateningly. “I’ll make sure it never moves again!” It swung one of its swords in a slow, questing arc, and Diamond Tiara fought the urge to flinch as the blade passed within a hair of her muzzle. “Hm…” the dog said, looking around. “Nothing?”

What do I do? Diamond Tiara thought. I could try to throw the stick, but if he sees me moving he’ll probably slice me up before realizing I’m a pony. Maybe I’ll just wait until he gets bored. She stood perfectly still, barely daring to breathe, as the dog poked around with his swords some more. The blades occasionally came dangerously close to her, but due to what Diamond Tiara could only call luck they never touched her. Eventually, the dog turned his back on her, scratching his head, and the Filly made her move. She pulled the stick out of her bag and threw it as hard as she could over the dog’s shoulder.

“Stick?!” the dog exclaimed and ran after it. The stick hit a pine tree and started to tumble toward the ground, but the dog managed to catch it in his mouth and then came trotting back toward Diamond Tiara, who froze in place the moment the dog turned back around. The dog dropped the stick and started looking around again. “Who threw the stick?” he asked, “Where’d it come from?” He looked down, realized he couldn’t see the now immobile stick on the ground, and whined, “And where’d it go? What a strange day…”

Diamond Tiara felt a twinge of sympathy for the dog. He’s just doing his job, she chided herself, and here I am messing with his head. As the dog knelt down and started feeling around for the stick, Diamond Tiara reached out a hoof and stroked his head.

“Wan!” The dog leaped two feet into the air, dropped his swords, and started dancing in place in agitation. “I’ve been pet!” he exclaimed, “P-pet by something that isn’t moving! T-t-this is too much; I need another dog treat.” He ran off down the path, abandoning his swords and barking his head off in confusion. Gold coins fell out of his pockets as he ran, and the Filly’s vision returned to normal.

“Whew,” she sighed in relief. The Filly picked up the coins and her stick and put them in her bag. Continuing down the path, Diamond Tiara came to a spot where the trees spread out briefly around a frozen pond. Sans was lounging near a tree, and as Diamond Tiara approached his skeletal grin seemed to widen and he gave her one his odd, skull-bending winks.

“looks like doggo didn’t give you much trouble,” Sans said.

“I think I scared him out of his wits,” Diamond Tiara said.

“nah, he’s just jumpy,” Sans said. “he’ll calm down by the time he gets to snowdin.”

“I should probably apologize anyway, if I ever see him again,” Diamond Tiara said. “What are you doing here, anyway? I thought you were helping your brother.”

“yeah,” Sans said, nonchalant, “the first puzzle’s just up ahead. careful on the ice.” Diamond Tiara nodded and, skirting the edge of the pond, continued down the path.

The trees came to an end at the edge of a cleared area of ground that terminated in sheer cliffs on three sides. Papyrus stood at the end of a short bridge connecting the path to a large plateau, and he held up a warding hand as the Filly reached the edge of the cleared space. Daimond Tiara stopped and waited. After a few moments, Sans came moseying up the path and leaned against one of the trees at the very edge of the clearing.

“SO NICE OF YOU TO FINALLY SHOW UP, BROTHER,” Papyrus said sarcastically. Sans just gave him a thumbs-up. “ANYWAY…” Papyrus stood up straighter and grinned at Diamond Tiara. “PONY!! BEHOLD MY FIRST PUZZLE: THE INVISIBLE ELECTRO-MAZE!! TRY AND NAVIGATE IT, BUT IF YOU TOUCH THE WALLS…” He held out a small orb, “THIS ORB WILL DELIVER AN ELECTRIC SHOCK!! NYEH HEH HEH!!”

“Um…” Diamond Tiara hesitated.

“just go for it, kid,” Sans said, giving the Filly a reassuring pat on the back. “it won’t hurt a bit. i promise.” Diamond Tiara looked at him askance, but then he winked and her doubts faded. With slow, cautious steps, the Filly began to cross the clearing, reaching a hoof out every other step to feel for walls. So intent was she on feeling out the maze that she didn’t realize she’d crossed the whole clearing until her nose bumped into Papyrus’s thigh bone. She looked up and saw that the tall skeleton was frowning.

“THAT CAN’T BE RIGHT,” Papyrus said, “I KNOW I PUT AT LEAST THREE TURNS IN THE MAZE...” He stepped out into the clearing and jumped around waving his arms around wildly for a bit. “WELL THAT’S STRANGE,” he said, rubbing his chin, “THE MAZE DIDN’T COME UP. GO BACK TO THE START PLEASE, PONY; LET’S TRY THIS AGAIN.” Diamond Tiara obliged and Papyrus went back to standing by the bridge. “AHEM,” Papyrus said, waving a hand, “INVISIBLE ELECTRO-MAZE!” He waited for a few seconds while nothing seemed to happen, then crossed his arms and said, “UH, TRY IT NOW.” Diamond Tiara stepped into the clearing and slowly made her way straight across again. “OH MY GOD, IT WAS WORKING A MINUTE AGO!!” Papyrus exclaimed. He ran out into the clearing again, and Sans ran out to join him. The two searched around for a moment, and then Papyrus threw his hands up and exclaimed, “FORGET IT! I’VE GOT OTHER PUZZLES TO SEE TO!” He charged across the bridge and out of sight.

Diamond Tiara looked at Sans, but the short skeleton just waved her on. “i’m going to work at this a little longer,” he said. “puzzles don’t just stop working out of the blue.” Diamond Tiara nodded and trotted off across the bridge.

Finally alone, Sans knelt down and scraped a bit of snow away from the south edge of the clearing, uncovering a thorny green vine that bulged out of the dirt. “that damn flower. what’s its game this time?” Sans looked around, saw no obvious clues, and walked away from the clearing.

* don’t think i didn’t notice that.

When Sans reached the next plateau, he saw Diamond Tiara speaking with the Nice Cream salesman. The Filly had bought one of the compliment-wrapped treats, and was now dispensing some commentary. “What gave you the dumb idea to try and sell cold ice cream during cold winter weather?” she asked.

“Um,” the salesman said, ears drooping, “it’s fitting to eat cold stuff when it’s cold out?”

Diamond Tiara face-hoofed. “No, no, that just makes you colder! When it’s cold, ponies… or monsters – whatever! They want to warm up. Now, if it were hot out, then you’d have customers looking for something cold to eat so they don’t feel so hot.”

“Oh, really?” the Nice Cream guy said, perking back up. “That does make sense. Perhaps I should head toward Hotland then?”

Diamond Tiara blinked. “Hot…land?” She glanced aside and caught a glimpse of Sans out of the corner of her eye, giving her a thumbs-up. “Yeah, sure,” she said to the salesman, “you do that.” She walked over to Sans and in a low voice asked, “Hotland?!”

“yep,” Sans said, “it’s just past the marshes of Waterfall and before you reach our capital, New Home.” He shrugged at the Filly’s bemused look. “what can i say? the king is rather bad at coming up with names.”

“Is there an ‘old’ Home?” Diamond Tiara asked.

“you passed through it on your way out of the ruins,” Sans replied.

“Ah.” The Filly and the skeleton moved on across the plateau, turning south to follow alongside a snowball mini-golf course that had been built over most of the plateau. About halfway along, a nearby bush shook and Diamond Tiara stopped short as she felt the familiar sensations of a potential monster fight. A white dog in full plate armor and wielding a stone sword leaped out of the bush and landed in front of her, panting excitedly. Diamond Tiara looked around for Sans, but the skeleton was still walking along the minigolf course without a care. The Filly looked back at the dog and hesitantly raised a hoof toward it, saying, “Uh, good doggy?” The dog woofed and leaned its head into Diamond Tiara’s hoof. The Filly pet the dog a few times and its tail started wagging fast enough to produce a faint sound. “Oh, you like that, do you?” Diamond Tiara said, continuing to pet. “Well, if you stick by me I’ll-” The dog’s eyes suddenly sparkled and it broke away, running off in a flurry of snow and leaving a trail of gold coins behind. “Or you can just drop all your bits for me to pick up,” the Filly sighed. She followed the trail, collecting the gold, until she reached a narrow natural bridge leading to another plateau, where Sans was waiting for her.

“you’re making out like a bandit,” Sans commented as Diamond Tiara scooped the last of the dog’s gold into her bag.

“How many more dog-sentries are there?” the Filly asked, “and are they all going to be so easy to get by?”

“three more,” Sans said, holding up three fingers, “although dogamy and dogaressa are an inseparable unit, and yes, so long as you keep using your head. or the stick.” They continued on until they came upon Papyrus again. The tall skeleton was making a valiant attempt to pick up a plate of spaghetti from a table, but the plate and pasta appeared to have fused to the table. “hey, bro,” Sans said.

“AH!” Papyrus looked startled. “OH, IT’S JUST YOU TWO. AHEM.” He struck a gallant pose. “I NOTICED THE SPAGHETTI I SET OUT AS A HUMAN TRAP HAS GOTTEN COLD, SO I WAS GOING TO WARM IT UP AND OFFER IT TO THE PONY, BUT…” He kicked the table, breaking one of the legs. The table fell over, but the plate of spaghetti remained in its spot. “WELL, YOU CAN SEE,” Papyrus said dejectedly.

“How is spaghetti supposed to be a trap?” Diamond Tiara asked.

Papyrus perked up instantly. “AH-HA!” he declared, “YOU SEE, LITTLE PONY, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, MADE THIS DELICIOUS SPAGHETTI TO ENTICE HUMANS INTO STOPPING TO EAT IT… AND STOP MAKING ANY PROGRESS!! NYEH HEH HEH HEH!”

Diamond Tiara quirked an eyebrow and went over to investigate the spaghetti. Besides being ice-cold and stuck to the plate, the noodles appeared to be simultaneously undercooked and burned and the sauce was little more than crushed vegetables frozen in their own juice. “Yes,” she drawled, “very enticing.”

“YOU THINK SO?” Papyrus exclaimed. “YES!” He pumped a fist in the air, and then remembered himself. “OH, I NEED TO DOUBLE-CHECK THE NEXT PUZZLE!” He ran on in his usual manner, laughing.

“Does he not get sarcasm?” Diamond Tiara asked Sans.

“most of the time,” Sans replied. “he’s just too hyped to notice right now.”

The next plateau was broken up such that the southeast corner was several feet below the northeast corner and the western side sloped downward. The path continued in the southeast, but that corner was blocked by spikes. Sans found a tree to lean against and, despite Diamond Tiara’s asking and then giving him the evil eye, left the Filly to figure out the puzzle on her own. Sans felt like taking a quick nap, but as he watched Diamond Tiara run about, troubling thoughts intruded on his mind. So far, aside from Doggo and Lesser Dog, she hasn’t run across any monsters. Snowdrake and the Ice Caps are always getting up in your face, but I haven’t even caught a glimpse of them. And Papyrus checks his puzzles every morning; there’s no way the invisible maze just stopped working without warning. Is something easing this pony’s path for her?

And why am I even watching a little pink pony instead of a human in the first place?

What the hell happened to Frisk? Gee, I wonder if a pony’s soul compares to a human’s…

“Hey Sans!” Diamond Tiara’s voice broke into the skeleton’s thoughts and he looked over to see her standing by the now-receded spikes. “I solved the puzzle, so let’s go.”

“don’t worry about me; i’ll catch up,” Sans called, waving the Filly on. He watched her cross to the southeastern corner of the plateau and nodded as, on cue, the Dogi appeared to block her path. At least some things are still on script, Sans thought.

The two cloaked, axe-wielding dogs circled Diamond Tiara, sniffing, and then looked at each other over her head. “Strange smell,” Dogamy, the dog with a mustache, declared.

“Excuse me?” Diamond Tiara exclaimed, miffed.

“Shaped wrong for a human, though,” Dogaressa, the dog with long eyelashes, said.

“That’s because I’m a pony!” Diamond Tiara snapped.

“Pony?” The Dogi exchanged another confused look.

“Yes!” the Filly said. “P-O-N-Y. An earth pony to be precise, and…” she trailed off into a frustrated growl as the dog’s eyes glazed over. She glanced over at Sans and saw the skeleton giving her what she assumed was an amused grin. “Fine,” she said, reaching into her bag, “you know what? Go fetch!” She pulled out her stick and threw it in Sans’s direction. It landed at Sans’s feet, but he looked unconcerned as the two cloaked dogs bounded after the stick with little semblance of control. He stepped aside just as Dogamy lost his footing on a patch of ice and somersaulted into the tree, spraying gold coins everywhere, and then again as Dogaressa slid to a stop next to her mate. Dogaressa helped Dogamy to his feet, then the two sheathed their axes and carried the stick back to Diamond Tiara together.

“That was fun,” Dogamy declared. Diamond Tiara gave him a strange look. “Again?”

“Sorry, but I’m really too busy to play,” the Filly said.

The Dogi exchanged a look, shrugged, and dropped the stick. “Ok,” Dogaressa said, “thanks anyway.” They left the way they’d come. Diamond Tiara shook her head at them until Sans came and handed her the dropped gold.

“Whoever made the clothes for all these dogs is really bad at pockets,” Diamond Tiara noted.

“nope,” Sans said, “we just all drop some of our gold when someone beats us in a fight, violently or trickily.”

“How much farther to the town?” the Filly asked.

“just a couple more plateaus,” Sans said, “and a few more of papyrus’s puzzles.”

“Joy,” Diamond Tiara said dryly.

Heading south, Sans and the Filly quickly came to a sharp turn in the path toward the east. Just around the corner, they saw Papyrus hopping madly on and off a large button while the two Dogi were alternating stepping on and sniffing at a pair of large blue Xs painted on the ground in the midst of a formation of ice boulders. A wall of spikes blocked the path onward. “TRY IT AGAIN!” Papyrus cried after stomping the button down one last time.

“They’re still not changing,” Dogamy said with a sigh.

“Not even making the click sounds,” Dogaressa concurred.

“GREAT,” Papyrus grumped, folding his arms.

“problem, bro?” Sans asked casually.

Papyrus looked over, jawbone swinging open with a snarky reply, but then he saw Diamond Tiara and just threw his arms in the air and declared, “I GIVE UP!!” He fell backward into the snow and stared up at the cave ceiling with a forlorn expression. “THIS IS IT,” he said, “MY PUZZLES AND TRAPS DON’T WORK, MY SPAGHETTI IS COLD… THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS NO MORE.”

“bro…” Sans started to say, but Papyrus threw up a hand to cut him off.

“DON’T MAKE LIGHT OF THIS SANS! I ALREADY LOOK LIKE ENOUGH OF A FOOL IN FRONT OF THE LITTLE PONY.” He turned his head to look at Diamond Tiara, tears leaking from his eye sockets. “I’M SORRY, PONY,” he said, “I TRIED, BUT… I GUESS YOU WOULDN’T WANT SOMEONE AS PATHETIC AS ME AS A FRIEND.”

Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes. “First Toriel, now this,” she said, strutting over to the tall skeleton. “Get up, Papyrus,” she commanded. “The only thing pathetic about you is how you’re acting right this minute. Come on, on your feet!” Papyrus sat up and wiped away his tears. “Good enough,” the Filly declared. “Papyrus, you remind me a lot of some fillies I know back home. They had a dream of achieving something big, and they put their whole hearts into trying to reach that goal. It wasn’t easy, and they probably failed more times than I’m even aware of, but that didn’t stop them. I see that same sort of determination in you, Papyrus. You want to join the Royal Guard, right?”

“YES,” Papyrus said, “BUT-”

“No buts,” Diamond Tiara said. “So your puzzles are broken today, so what? Look on the bright side: at least they didn’t fail while a Human was around. And from what I’ve seen, you’ve at least got some good ideas behind the puzzles. I think you have it in you to be one of the best Royal Guards this underground has ever seen.”

Papyrus looked like he was about to cry again. “YOU… REALLY THINK SO, PONY?”

“Yes,” the Filly said with a nod, “and I’d be glad to be your friends as well, but first you have to pick yourself back up and never give up on your dream.”

“I…” Confidence returned to Papyrus’s face and he surged to his feet in a triumphant, cape-billowing pose. “YES!” he shouted, “I WILL NEVER GIVE UP! I WILL BE THE GREAT PAPYRUS, MEMBER OF THE ROYAL GUARD! UNPARRALELLED SPAGHETTORE! I WILL BE RESPECTED! THE KING WILL CARVE A BUSH IN THE SHAPE OF MY FACE!!” He grabbed Diamond Tiara up in a hug, then caught himself and put herself and tried to regain his cocky demeanor while ignoring Dogamy’s chuckling. “AHEM. THANK YOU PONY, FOR YOUR FRIENDSHIP.”

“You’re welcome,” Diamond Tiara said. “Although,” she added in a flat tone, “if we are to be friends, you have to stop calling me ‘Pony.’ My name is Diamond Tiara.”

“THAT’S A BIT OF A MOUTHFUL,” Papyrus noted, rubbing his chin, “BUT IF YOU INSIST. I CAN’T SAY NO TO A FRIEND.”

“this is great and all,” Sans cut in, “but we still have a broken puzzle blocking our way.”

“RIGHT!” Papyrus said, whirling around until he faced the spike wall. “WAIT HERE; I’LL SEE IF THE HIDDEN RESET SWITCH IS WORKING.” He sprinted toward the spikes and leaped over them in a single, high bound. A few moments later, the spikes retracted into the ground and Papyrus reappeared, striking a heroic pose. “NYEH HEH HEH HEH! THE PATH IS CLEAR, THNAKS TO THE GREAT-”

“Thank you, Papyrus,” the Dogi said as they ran past him. Papyrus watched them go with arms akimbo and an annoyed look on his face.

“HOW RUDE!” the skeleton yelled after the two dogs. “I’LL BE REPORTING THIS TO UNDYNE, YOU KNOW!” He huffed and then glanced back. “WELL P- UH, DIAMOND TIARA, SHALL WE GET GOING?”

“Yes, please,” the Filly answered.

Diamond Tiara and the skeleton brothers traveled together the rest of the fairly short way to the entrance of Snowdin town without serious incident. Papyrus explained the remaining puzzles on the route, all of which were either inoperable or already solved by the Dogi, who were sniffing around for clues to the mystery puzzle saboteur. Diamond Tiara was momentarily frightened when the Greater Dog emerged from a snow pouf just outside the town, but the hulking canine simply looked at Sans and Papyrus, gave them a nod and a friendly bark, and stepped aside.

“yeah,” Sans explained, “he’s just a big softie. actually, more of a little softie in huge armor.”

Snowdin had a small-town, welcoming feel to Diamond Tiara, once she got over her surprise that most of the population was bears and giant rabbits all walking on two legs and wearing clothes. Papyrus took the Filly on a whirlwind tour of the town’s main street, pointing out the general store and inn, Grillby’s restaurant, the library, and finally the skeleton brothers’ own house. Sans hung back by the town’s welcoming sign, deep in his own thoughts, until Papyrus and the Filly came trotting back.

“YOU LOOK GLOOMY ALL OF A SUDDEN SANS,” Papyrus said, bringing the shorter skeleton back to reality.

“huh?” Sans looked up, and then at Diamond Tiara. “oh, right, i guess you’ll want to talk about what comes next, huh? let’s go to grillby’s; i’ll treat you to lunch while we talk.”