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Feminine

by hhhhhhh

Chapter 1: They Think He's...?


Author's Notes:

Just a little oneshot about the fact that some people are seemingly unable to comprehend the fact that there are others in the world who are as strong as/stronger than them. Oh, and also the stupidity of the gay streotypes.

"AJ, can I tell you something?"

Applejack looked at the cyan pegasus on her doorstep, who was trying not to look nervous. Cautiously, she nodded. "Uh, yeah. Is it the thing you wanted to --?"

"Yeah," said Rainbow, perhaps too quickly.

"Okay. Ah'm sorry Ah couldn't stop, by the way. Mah cutie mark was --"

"Yeah, yeah, can I just tell you?"

"Sure. Ah ain't stoppin' ya."

Dash bit her lip, her eyes drifting to the orchard. "Somewhere...else, please? I-I don't want anypony overhearing."

"Sure." Applejack's voice was clear of cation, now that she had a pretty good idea of what Dash was going to tell her. Well, what she suspected Dash was going to tell her, anyway.

The two mares walked in silence for a while, slowing down a bit as the humidity got to them. It was near noon, so some of the taller trees provided glorious shade, but the heat was so close that it caused both of them to start to sweat.

Eventually, Dash decided upon a particularly shady tree and lay down under it. AJ sat by her side, looking at the pegasus mare expectantly. She wasn't bothering to hide her anxiety now.

Her mouth opened; no words came out. "Take your time, sugar," Applejack said softly, relaxing and focusing on a spot away from the multihued mare, but made sure she was still visible in her peripheral vision.

"I'm gay," she blurted after a minute or so of fumbling with her hooves and words. AJ resisted the cruel temptation to declare 'Ah knew it'.

Instead, she embraced the pegasus loosely. "Cool. How many of us have ya told?"

"...Everypony. You were the last to know, sorry."

"Nah, it's alright. Mind me askin' how long you've known?"

She blew air out of the 'o' shape her mouth had formed. "Like, forever," she decided. "But consciously? I only properly came to terms with it a couple years ago. Before then...I thought I was just giving in to the teasing."

Applejack looked at her. "The...teasing?"

Rainbow pinched the bridge of her nose in annoyance. "Please, don't. Yeah, I've been teased about my 'walking lesbian stereotype'-iness my whole frickin' life. I didn't really give a crap, and I still don't, but it irritated me because part of me knew it was true."

"Oh. Ah'm a might sor --"

"I said don't. I've had enough of it, what with Rarity and Fluttershy bursting into tears and forgetting that I'm one hell of a strong pony. Just don't."

"Okay." Applejack stayed quiet for a while. "Have you told Scootaloo?"

Dash scratched the back of her neck. "Yeah. She'd kinda already guessed it, though."

Thank Celestia Ah ain't the only one. "That's great, sugar. So," she arched a sly eyebrow, "do you have a crush on anyone?"

Rainbow pushed her away, annoyed but laughing regardless. "Nope. Well, I've considered dating all of you, and it didn't seem like the worst thing in the world -- that's pretty much how I figured it out -- but other than that...no."

"M'kay." Applejack still had her suspicions, but she set them aside. "Are you still gettin' crap about your sexuality?"

"No." She laughed harshly. "The ponies...they've kinda moved on to someone else, as I'm sure you know."

Applejack's brow creased. "Ah...no, Ah don't. What d'you mean?"

Dash's eyes widened. "You don't...? Aw, crap." She massaged her temple, sighing. "I-it's not my place to tell you."

"It certainly is now you've brought it up," demanded the earth pony sternly, though her face was still riddled with concern.

Rainbow sucked on her lips. "It's...well, ever since the Sisterhooves Social, your brother..." She trailed off, but enough had been said.

"W-what?" Her face was unreadable. Was she confused? Upset? Angry? Relieved? Dash didn't know. Rainbow's own expression was grim.

"Who's doin' it? Dash tell me who it is!" AJ nearly yelled.

Rainbow grinned. "Now that I can do: Flitter and Thunderlane are the main two, but also Flitter's sister and a couple others on the weather team. I've only seen it happen a few times, and I've told 'em to buck off, but I doubt it's doing any good."

Applejack's lips parted. How could she not have noticed? And, more importantly: why hadn't Big Mac told her? Rainbow watched as the worry in AJ's train of thought slowly spread to her face.

"Ah...Ah gotta go, Rainbow." She galloped off.

"'Kay. See ya." Rainbow flew up into the sky, heading Celestia knows where.


AJ had never run so fast in her entire life. Multiple times, she thought knew for certain that she was going to trip and fall and smash her face in, but she willed herself not to with every fibre of her being that wasn't otherwise occupied and -- surprisingly -- kept running.

Her head was low, but she could just about see her house now. Perhaps it was the air resistance rushing against her eyeballs, or perhaps it was...something else...but Applejack felt cold tears flying away from her face as she neared.

She hastily wiped her cheeks as she slowed down, then burst through the front door. "Big Mac?!" she hollered, her voice cracking and betraying her strong demeanour.

No answer. Of course; of course; he's in the barn!

Mentally slapping herself for not going there first, AJ cantered down the steps and directed herself towards the barn. Stupid, stupid, stupid, Ah should've known!

She knew she should've apologised for not persisting further with the issue between him and Apple Bloom -- that way, he might've trusted her enough to tell her! Shoot, does Apple Bloom know? No, no, she would've told me! Or...maybe he told her not to...? Darn it! No, you can't think like that, Applejack! He's just --

Thwack.

Applejack's head snapped sideways as she crashed into a soft yet sturdy figure. The force caused it to collapse, so they both ended up in the dirt.

"Applejack! Are y'all alright!" came the voice of Big Mac.

The farm mare bounded to her hooves in an instant and pushed her brother upright as well. "Of course Ah'm alright! Ah should be asking you that question! Are ya alright?" Her last sentence was calmer than the rest.

"Eeyu --!"

"Of course ya ain't...wait...what?! Mac, please! Ah know some of the folks on the weather team are givin' ya a hard time 'cuz of what ya did at the Sisterhooves Social! Why didn't ya tell me?!"

Big Mac looked blank for a second and opened his mouth, but decided against whatever he was going to say and lowered his head.

"Ya can't keep stuff like this from me! It's important; Ah need to know!"

"Applejack, will ya please stop treatin' me like a child."

"And it ain't as if y'all are doin' anything against it! Ya can't let ponies do this to ya, Mac!"

"Applejack!" She froze at her brother's sudden harsh tone. "Stop lecturin' me. Please."

She paused for a second to think, then narrowed her eyes at him. "This ain't somethin' you can sweep under the rug! It's a big issue, and y'all need somepony to --"

"Ah do not need somepony to stand up for me!" He stomped his hoof. "Especially not you! Ah don't need you to defend me, alright! Ah don't care what they think, because what Ah did made Apple Bloom happy and that's all that matters!"

Applejack breathed sharply. "That well may be, big brother," she admitted, her voice dangerously low. "But what happens when the afterglow fades away, hmmm? Will it still be 'worth it'?"

"Yes! So long as Apple Bloom pays attention to me, Ah'm content with whatever nonsense they throw at me, 'cuz Ah know that that's all it is: nonsense! Honestly: if Ah didn't know better Ah'd say you're jealous of all the attention Apple Bloom's givin' me!"

Applejack fumed. Through gritted teeth, she said, "Ah ain't jealous. Ah'm worried about ya, and Ah'm buckin' mad at the ponies who're treatin' ya like this."

"Then why don't ya go blow a fuse nearby them instead of me, huh?"

Applejack held a firm gaze on her brother. It was no use. There was nothing in his eyes that suggested he was more hurt than he was letting on.

The mare slumped into the ground. "Ah wanted to make sure y'all were alright first."

"And that's all fine and dandy," Big Mac said, sitting by his sister. "But for next time...ya just need to ask. Don't get mad, but Ah've got a feelin' that all the praise and superiority Apple Bloom showered ya with has gone to your head."

Applejack opened her mouth to argue, but controlled herself and mulled it over. "Ya may be right, y'know."

"'May be'?" He laughed. "Ah am right. Ah know ya like the back of mah hoof, Applejack. You're barely even a year younger than me. Ah've always been able to talk to you about stuff.

"The only reason Ah kept this from you was because Ah knew you'd react like this. Ah don't need ya to baby me, Applejack. Ah'm not Apple Bloom. Ah'm older than ya, for cryin' out loud. Ah can handle this. It don't bother me, and Ah wish you'd be able to respect that."

A silence clouded with deep thinking descended upon them. Applejack forced her stubborn side to stay out of the way while she processed and contemplated everything that her brother had said.

"Can Ah still give 'em a what-for if Ah come across them in town?"

Mac laughed. "Eeynope. Like Ah said, it don't bother me."

"So...should Ah not tell anypony?"

"Nope."

Silence.

"Big Mac?"

"Eeyup?"

"Ah love ya. Ah know Ah don't say it enough, but Ah love ya?"

"Ah love ya too, little sis."

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