THE TEACHER, THE SORCERESS, AND THE WONDERBOLT

Chapter 10: Bets and Balls

“Mith Cheerilee, Thouldn't we go inthide? Look at thothe cloudth.”

The schoolmarm looked up in the direction to which was alluded, and gave a skeptical frown. Deciding that the darkening clouds were nothing to be concerned about, she turned to the filly who had asked the question. “I think we'll be alright, Twist. Lunch and recess is only another half-hour. We'll be in long before they get close enough to bother us.”

The red-maned filly nodded and ran off to join Apple bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo in a game of extreme hopscotch. The mare wasn't certain what the rules were, but the hopping had to be done on one hoof while trying to juggle three pine cones on one's nose. So far, nopony had won a game yet. She watched the game for a moment, smiling when Scootaloo dropped the pine cones, one after another right on her face.

“That looks like it hurt.”

Cheerilee turned to see her sister, Berry Punch leaning on the fence that demarcated the schoolyard, one foreleg draped over it casually. “Berry? What brings you here?”

“My hooves,” she answered simply, getting an annoyed look for her flippancy. “I was just dropping off Berry Pinch's lunch.” She nodded towards her daughter who was now sitting under a tree, biting into a daisy sandwich. “So, I heard some new competition is sniffing around your mare.”

Cheerilee's expression turned from annoyed to outright sour. “She's not mine, she's her own mare, and I'll thank you to leave it alone.”

“With an attitude like that, it's hardly surprising that she's not yours yet.” Berry could see that her remark really hurt and softened her normally acerbic tone a little. “Look, Cheers, I'm just trying to watch out for my little sister, you know? We may not always get along, but you're still family, and I care about you.” Cheerilee stood there, considering her sister's words.”And Li'l berry seems to have taken a shine to you as well for some strange reason.”

The teacher shook her head in amusement. “Well, I-” She came up short in realization. “Wait a sec. What did you mean by 'I heard'? Heard from whom?”

Berry Punch face-hoofed and groaned. “Seriously? Cheers, practically the whole town knows about you pining away for that silly little unicorn of Celestia's. You're not exactly subtle about it. I think the only ones who don't know attend your class. Even then, I wouldn't be surprised if they did know. And her, of course.” She leaned closer looking her sister in the eye. “And since the liar and the superstar rolled into town, ponies have started taking bets on who is going to win.”

“They what?” she shrieked.

Berry Punch motioned with her hoof. “Hssst! Quiet! You want the little ones to find out? Besides, aren't you supposed to be their model for civility?”

Cheerilee whipped her head around, and noticed several fillies and colts suddenly becoming interested in what was in front of them. “They're betting? On who Twilight chooses?” she hissed. “That's... that's... disgusting!”

The plum earth pony rolled her eyes. “Tell me about it. The rubes totally refuse to lower the odds on you winning. Keep saying that you're 'too plain'. Won't even listen when I tell them that the little nerd obviously has a thing for teachers. Anypony can see the way she looks at Celestia, for crying out loud.”

Her sister was incredulous. “You bet on me? ME?”

She firmly tapped her hoof on the fencepost saying, “Yeah, on you winning! And you better, too. Li'l Berry's college fund is getting a big boost from this.”

“Berry, that's just... I don't even... the ethical implications here are just... ugh!” Cheerilee threw up her hooves in disgust. “Wait,” she turned to her sister, “what did you mean, 'the way she looks at Celestia'? She doesn't look at the Princess in any particular way other than as a mentor.”

Berry Punch looked to the heavens. “Oh, my Celestia, not you too! Look, do you know how long she was Celestia's student?”

Cheerilee nodded. “She spent something close to fifteen years under her direct tutelage, not to mention the time she spent working for her here. So what?”

“And she has a 'thing' about learning, right? Always looking for a lesson in everything?” the plum mare received a nod in return. “And Celestia is reputed to be the smartest, cleverest, most beautiful, tolerant, kind, blah, blah, blah, all-around bestest pony ever, right?”

“Well, I wouldn't put it lik-”

“Right?” Another nod. “Well, I'm sure you can do simple math, so start adding it up. Cheers, she so has a 'thing' for teachers. She can't have Celestia, because let's face it, a Princess and a minor noble, no matter how uncommon has exactly zero chance of getting together. And Celestia's just too hard to read. She's had thousands of years to perfect her poker face, so it's hard to say how she feels about Twilight.” Berry Punch leaned further against the rail, closer to her sister's face and looked off into the distance. “So, here's the facts. One: we have a mare with a fetish for teachers, two: a teacher/mentor who either can't or won't return her feelings, and three: an available teacher with the hots for her.”

She gave Cheerilee a sideways glance as she continued, “And just what does the competition have? Fame and magical power. Fame we can dismiss out of hoof, because have you ever known that bookworm to be dazzled by fame? At least, when it wasn't her precious Princess?” She could see her sister giving her words careful consideration. “So that just leaves little Miss Great and Powerful as your only real challenger. And the day my sister can't beat a blowhard like her, is the day I stop drinking, because obviously, I'm doing it wrong.”

“Berry, I appreciate your confidence in me, but this is none of your concern,” Cheerilee sighed.

“Wrong again, little sis,” she retorted. “This is my concern because I will not have you moping around my house again, moaning about how you let another one get away.”

The maroon mare looked offended at this. “I did not-”

“Roadapples,” Berry Punch interrupted, her vulgarity causing Cheerilee's cheeks to redden. “Remember your second year in college? What was her name? Moondancer?”

Cheerilee shot her a dirty look. “That was low, bringing her up.”

The plum mare looked at her with sympathy in her eyes. “The point Cheers, is that I'm helping you for two reasons. First is that I want to see you happy, and as much as it confuses me, I honestly can see you being happy with the little geek.”

“She is not-”

“Whatever,” Berry Punch dismissed her sister's indignation with a wave of her hoof. “And the second reason is that winning this pot could mean the difference between a university or a community college for Li'l Berry.”

Cheerilee looked at her in astonishment. “The odds on me are that long?”

Nodding the plum mare said, “Oh, yeah. You have got a heck of an uphill battle as far as public opinion goes in this town. At least when it comes to desirability.”

The more Cheerilee thought about this, the angrier she got. When she looked up at her sister again, there was a fire in her eyes. “Put me down for five hundred bits. On my winning.”

Berry Punch reared back. “Are you sure about this, Cheers? That's like a month's pay for you.”

Cheerilee stood her forelegs on the fence rail, putting her face-to-face with her older sister. “As Celestia as my witness, I will win. That. Mare's. HEART!” Berry Punch was so taken aback by her vehemence, that she fell backwards onto the ground. With that, she turned around, shouting, “Inside, children! We have learning to do!” Groans of disappointment from the foals were punctuated by a single “yay” from Twist.

The plum mare laid where she had fallen, watching her little sister lead her flock indoors from the coming rain with surprise. When the door finally closed, a devious smile spread across her face. “All too easy, little sis,” she whispered to herself. “I'd feel bad about manipulating you, if we weren't both getting something we want out of this arrangement.” As she got to her hooves and dusted herself off, she made a mental note to put her sister down for just one hundred bits. No sense endangering her livelihood unnecessarily. After all, if she wins, she'll be set for life anyway.

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Twilight set down the fourth and final bowl on its plate before returning to the kitchen to tend to the food. Left behind at the table, was Celestia, Trixie, and Spitfire, with a space left empty between the last two. Spike was once again, conspicuous in his absence. Spitfire was glaring at Trixie, who was herself looking smug and ignoring her altogether.

“So, how was the trip, Captain?”

Celestia's question startled out of her brooding. “Huh? Oh, um, it was rather... uh, cathartic, Your Highness.”

An arched eyebrow said volumes, but she seemed to not notice, so Celestia just asked her distracted pony. “Cathartic? In what way, Captain?”

Spitfire finally registered what she had said and blanched. “Uh, um, er, that is... you see... it was...”

“I think she means physically,” Twilight answered for the stammering mare. Celestia and Trixie stared in wide-eyed shock at the librarian. It was obvious that licentious thoughts were running through their heads, but Twilight didn't notice, concentrating as she was at trying not to spill any of the soup she was carrying.

Celestia was able to find her tongue first. “I don't think I quite catch your meaning, Twilight.”

Twilight set down the enormous soup pot as well as a plateful of oyster crackers. “You know how good it feels to just go out and run? Kinda like that. The Everfree is such a dangerous place, that just walking through it is a bit of a harrowing experience. It really gets your blood pumping.”

All three mares breathed a sigh of relief, though each for different reasons. Celestia was surprised at the sigh coming from Spitfire and wondered at its reason. Was she just covering up for her? No, my Twilight would never outright lie to me, and her thinking isn't nearly twisty enough to convolute that answer into something other than what it is. “So what was this sphinx like? I've only met one that I know of.”

Twilight beamed at the Princess as she served the soup. “Oh, she was the cutest little chatterbox you've ever seen. Smart as a whip, too. You should see the library she lives in. It makes the Royal Canterlot Archives look like a corner book nook.”

The monarch turned her attention away from the tomato soup in front of her in surprise. “Library? She wouldn't happen to be Nyx, would she?”

“Well, her mother is Nyx. The little one wasn't old enough to have chosen her own name yet, according to the elder one who actually owned the library.” Her answer seemed to send her mentor into a thoughtful posture.

“So that's what's been going on...” Celestia mumbled to herself after a moment.

Twilight cocked her head to the side. “Sorry? What was that, Princess?”

Startled out of her reverie, the Princess looked over to her student and smiled. “Just woolgathering, Twilight.” I'd better have a talk to Luna about leaving me out of the fun. Still, no rule saying I can't use my own spoon to stir the pot a little myself, now is there? “You know Twilight, your brother and new sister-in-law should be back from their honeymoon soon.”

The librarian looked up at her ruler as she sat down to eat. “Really? So I can finally find out where they've been?”

“I suppose it's alright to let the cat out of the bag now,” Celestia tasted her soup and hummed her approval. “They went to the Bahamares. Shining Armor picked the spot out himself.” She looked over, not at Twilight, but at the mares seated to either side of her. “He can be quite romantic when he puts his mind to it. It must run in the family.”

Twilight waved a hoof at the Princess. “Oh, come on, Princess. That tourist trap? He may as well have taken her to Las Pegasus for all the romanticism that it can offer. Sure, there's the beaches and sunsets, and what have you; but it's so crowded and... kitschy. No, I love my brother, but I'm willing to bet bits to beignets that he got the idea from one of his subordinates. Probably Lieutenant Goldenrod. He always was a bit of a lost cause when it came to mares.”

The alicorn grinned at her, but kept slipping a surreptitious glances to the others. “So where would you have chosen if it were you getting married?”

Both Spitfire and Trixie sat frozen to their seats as they stared intently at Twilight, waiting with bated breath for her answer.

“Well, of course, the first thing to do is to research what my partner, in this case, Princess Cadence, likes and doesn't like. I happen to know that she absolutely hates crowds. Despises them, even. She doesn't care for the way they always bow and scrape when she's around them. Right there, the Bahamares are out. Not even your private villa there would provide the solitude that she would desire. Secondly, she doesn't like to spend anything frivolously, whether it be time, money, or even patience.” She took another spoonful of soup, she and the Princess being the only ones to still be doing so.

She swallowed her mouthful before continuing, “Thirdly, she attaches more value to grand, romantic gestures, than to cost of said gesture. Allow me to illustrate.” With her magic, Twilight arranged the oyster crackers into a line graph on the table. “Now, as we all know, there are certain things that can't be done without money. This is especially true of entertainment. The bottom axis represents, well, the bottom line. Money spent. The vertical axis represents romantic value.”

More crackers joined the graph, forming a rough line that peaked, then dropped suddenly near the end in a standard bell curve. “As this graph clearly shows, romantic value, or RV drop after a certain point, called the point of diminishing returns. We can call this the average point for mares.” She enveloped one of the crackers a little more than halfway to the peak in a magical field and turned it pink and heart-shaped. “I believe that Princess Cadence would actually find her saturation point somewhere around here.”

Celestia smiled as she watched the other two mares goggle at Twilight's in-depth explanation. “So, where would you take her for the honeymoon?”

Twilight put her hoof to her chin in thought, looking off into the distance. “Hmmm... well, considering how much fun she had on the ski trip we took when I was eight, I would venture to say that I would take her to the same little ski chalet in the Swayback Mountains. Not only is it fun and cozy, it holds special memories for she and I.” She took some of the crackers from her graph, and floated them to her soup. “I would also make sure to arrange with Luna for a meteor shower, and to bring the moon especially close, but not so close as to cause problems.”

The lavender mare sipped some more of her soup, then appended, “Of course, there'd be little touches, too. For instance, the living room would be filled with tiger lilies, her favorite flowers, a bottle of chilled wine waiting for us, the makings for Eggplant Parmesan, her favorite meal, which I would prepare myself, and of course, a sexy negligee...” Twilight drifted off and turned as red as the soup in her bowl, which she was now studiously examining.

All three members of her audience looked at each other in surprise. “It seems this is something you have given considerable thought,” Celestia stated.

Twilight regarded her in shocked embarrassment. “No! I-I mean, you misunderstand, Princess. This was just a hypothetical situation, really! It was based off of easily obtained data that any halfway observant pony could gather.”

“So, you would do the same for whatever pony you married?” Celestia asked.

The purple mare fidgeted in her chair. “Of course. That is, if I was in charge of it.”

Celestia carefully watched Spitfire and Trixie and noted their reactions. Both were looking at Twilight with adoration in their eyes. It seems rather obvious that both of them care deeply for her. I wonder if Cheerilee feels the same? I'll have to watch her carefully during Twilight's lesson today.

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The walk to the schoolhouse was interesting to say the least. The promised rain came down with a vengeance. The weather team wanted to put it off for the Princesses' visit, but Celestia threatened to fire any weather pony who put off the much-needed scheduled storm. The torrential downpour turned the town square as well as the unpaved streets into a giant mud puddle, and showed no signs of abating. Seeing further than the muzzle on one's face was pretty much impossible, and the noise of the rain was deafening. Twilight insisted on erecting a shield over their collective heads, and laying down a magical floor as they walked to keep from tracking mud into the school. The end effect was a lot like walking in a giant purple bubble.

Finally, they arrived, the bubble dissipating as they walked in. Cheerilee greeted them in the hallway to the classroom, bowing towards Celestia. “Your Highness. I'm so glad that the rain could not keep you from seeing Twilight teach her second class.”

The alicorn smiled at the teacher in greeting. “As if I'd let some wind and water keep me from my favorite student.” Twilight practically radiated joy at her mentor's words as she nuzzled up to her. “Has my sister arrived yet?”

“Yes, Ma'am. Just before it started raining in earnest, she arrived,” Cheerilee replied. “She's waiting inside.”

A beaming Twilight trotted towards the class. “Then let's get started!”

They walked in, with Twilight taking up her position at the blackboard, and the guests at sitting on cushions at the back of the class. Celestia sat next to Luna and whispered to her, “Did you have a good time at Fluttershy's, sister?”

Luna nodded. “Sooth, we ha-”

Further conversation was interrupted by an attention-getting cough from Twilight. Very polite, but the looks she was giving the adults in the back row brooked no argument. When sufficient quiet reigned, she loudly said, “Good afternoon, class.” The now-familiar chorus of “Good afternoon, Miss Twilight”s from the foals greeted her in return. “I know we have some illustrious guests with us today, but for now, I want you to ignore them. We have lots to cover today.” The mare's horn glowed purple as she examined each of them in turn, and she smiled. “I see that you all have been doing your homework. Very good, everypony.”

A pink filly raised her hoof, and stood when Twilight acknowledged her. “Miss, Twilight, how did you know if we practiced or not?”

“A very good question, Berry Pinch. It's because of this,” she said and pointed to her horn. “I saw your magical auras have strengthened considerably since we last met. I'm especially impressed by yours, Dinky Doo. I daresay it's almost doubled in intensity. Well done.”

The little gray unicorn blushed, but smiled at the praise. She was surprised when a gold star sticker floated over to her, and affixed itself to her chest like a medal. Twilight winked at her before returning to the rest of the class. “Now then, today we're going to practice our levitation techniques.”

A collective groan reached her ears. “I know, I know, most of you already have the basics down. But today's lesson is for two reasons. The first is to get everypony up to about the same level right now. The second is to improve your technique. I've noticed that some of you who already can levitate are wasting a lot of energy.” Her horn glowed again, as she lifted eight balls from her saddlebags and placed one in front of each of her students.

As she went into a lengthy explanation on exactly how to lift the balls, complete with graphs and illustrations on the chalkboard, Celestia sent her mind to her sister. You have some explaining to do, little sister.

Luna was startled, but recovered quickly. What dost thou meanest? Hath we offended thee in some way?

Indeed you have, Lulu. You went and arranged a little adventure with Nyx so that you could play matchmaker. I was not even aware she had returned, let alone reconnected her library to this plane. Celestia grinned at her sister's mental shying away. Surely, you know that if anypony deserves to meddle in her affairs, it is I.

Luna gave a chuckle. Verily, we are most contrite, and beg thy indulgence. We knew that yon mare was thine to “meddle with” as thou put it. We merely sought to bring a mote of happiness to she who hath done so much for us. And because...

Celestia picked up on her melancholy through their link, and sent a wave of reassurance back at her sister.I'll forgive you this time... provided you include me in any future dealings. Twilight is... well, I have a vested interest in her happiness, let us say.

The moon Princess looked at her sister, who sat with a Saturnine expression. More so than the others? Thou... thou truly cares for her like a dam, dost thou not?

An almost imperceptible nod was her only response. Celestia's sadness was fleeting, however. It was quickly replaced with a glowing pride for her “daughter” who seemed to be leading her class like a genius conductor leads an orchestra. Her attention was drawn to the mare who occupied the cushion next to the blackboard.

Cheerilee was openly staring at Twilight with half-lidded eyes. Barely perceptible for those who knew to look for it, was an ever so slight blush on her cheeks. Celestia even detected a miniscule movement of her hind legs. There was a scarcely detectable clenching and relaxing of her strong, earth pony muscles that signaled to the Princess that she was trying to relieve some built-up... tension, of a specific sort.

As the lesson continued, her attention was once again brought back to the students, who were now levitating the lead balls into the air. It was nothing fancy, but even the most raw among them was working with the adroitness of a seasoned student several years beyond their grade. A few of the more daring among them were even spinning the balls, but not much more than that, because Twilight would put a stop to any shenanigans before they could get out of hoof.

When she felt that everypony had more or less a grasp of the fundamentals, she said, “Alright, everypony, time to pass the balls forward.” As they came into her telekinetic grasp, she pulled out a stack of books from her saddlebag, and passed them out to each foal. “These will be your textbooks for the class.” A chorus of groans came from the assembled students. “At least, they are the first of your textbooks. “An even louder paean of disappointment met her announcement.

The thick tomes landed on their desks with a light, yet audible thump. One glance at the cover let them know that the fun part of today's lesson was over. A Brief History of Magic, while insightful and chock full of intriguing information, was not the sort of title that evoked images of excitement, or even vague interest. “Now, remember,” Twilight announced, “These books are only on loan from my personal collection, meaning that if they are conveniently lost or destroyed, your parents will be stuck with a bill for fifty-four bits to replace them.” This news was greeted with disappointment mixed with fear.

“Also, please be so kind as to not draw or take notes in them. That's what your composition books are for.” The lavender mare walked over to her desk and opened her own copy of the book. “Now, then. Who wants to begin reading chapter one for us?”

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The day's lesson over, students began to file out of the classroom, greeting the Princesses as they left. Snips and Snails also shot Trixie a dirty look on the way out. After all, it was her fault their parents were stuck paying for much of the damages the Ursa Minor had caused. Trixie, of course, ignored them.

Twilight walked up to Cheerilee, eight heavy lead balls levitating beside her. “Would it be alright if I stored these here, Cheerilee? I'm kinda tight on space right now at the library.”

“Of course, Twilight,” she replied. “Let me open the storage room for you.” As they left the classroom for the hallway, the maroon mare explained, “The lock sometimes sticks. I've been trying to requisition a new one, but the superintendent doesn't seem to think it's a high priority.” She used a key to unlock it, before stepping in and putting a bucket in the doorway to prop it open. She walked towards the back where there was some shelf space open. “Here you go, right next to the cleaning supplies.”

Celestia watched them leave for a moment with a smile, then made a big show of looking out the window as if she had spotted something. Naturally, all three other ponies looked as well to see what she was looking at, giving her the opportunity to use her magic unseen. Her horn began to glow, as did the bucket which could barely be seen from her position. The prop was gently shoved inside, allowing the door to close automatically.

Unaware of all this, Twilight gingerly placed the balls between several large bottles of floor cleaner. The audible CLINK they made as they came to rest, covered up the sound of the door closing and locking them in. “I really think I'm reaching them,” the purple mare said. “I've never seen foals so eager to learn before. All my classmates in school just wanted to learn the flashy stuff or play around. It was very distracting when I was studying for the entrance exam to the Princess's school.”

Cheerilee nodded in agreement. “I suppose a lot of it has to do with the approach of the teacher as well as the temperament of the students. Of course, it helps that they all know you personally.”

“True. I don't mind telling you, there were some teachers that could put even me to sleep,” Twilight replied.

They walked back to the door, and Cheerilee stopped dead in her tracks. “The door!” She ran up to it, and found it firmly closed. Since there was no handle on this side, she was left standing there dumbly. She picked up the bucket and examined it. “How did this happen? The bucket's never failed before.”

The maroon earth pony dropped the bucket and ran up to Twilight, shaking her by the shoulders. “What are we going to do? We can't get out! We're trapped! There's not even a window we can crawl through!” She started breathing heavy, tears forming in her eyes.

Twilight held her in her forelegs, and caressed her mane, trying to calm her down. “Shhh... it'll be okay, Cheerilee. It'll be okay.” She looked her in the eyes, and immediately, the earth pony's breathing returned to a semblance of normality. “Remember? I'm a unicorn. I'll get us out of this.”

“Please hurry. I... I don't like confined spaces. As long as I know I can get out, I do okay, but this...”

The lavender mare held her close as she began working her magic on finding a way out. “Hmm, I can't seem to grab hold of the key on the other side. I don't want to destroy the door, so I'm going to try a new spell. It should allow us to walk through the door as if it weren't there.” She looked the other mare in the eyes once again. “Ready?”

Cheerilee nodded, and Twilight's horn took on its familiar glow. The door shimmered and waved like a mirage and turned translucent. The ponies hustled out of the storage room, and immediately, Cheerilee started breathing easier. “I... I'm sorry you had to see that, Twilight,” she gasped. “I haven't had a panic attack like that in over a year.”

Twilight rested a hoof on her shoulder reassuringly. “It's alright Cheerilee. We all have our fears. Why, it wasn't too long ago that I turned the whole town on its ear because I was afraid of being... t- t- late.” She shuddered at the mere mention of the word. “I think we can forgive this, uh... incident. And don't worry. Nopony will hear of this from me. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my- OW!” She pulled her hoof away from her sore eye, wincing in pain. “Never can get the timing on that right.”

Author's Notes:

Woo! This story just keeps chugging along, doesn't it? This is fun to write, though. Never thought I'd get more out of my writing than I do my drawing. I guess it's just because the gratification is faster. The actual drawing doesn't take very long, but inking and coloring can turn into a real chore. With writing it just... flows out. Anywho, the usual disclaimers apply here, everything in this story but the arrangement of the words belongs to Hasbro and Lauren Faust.