Author's Notes:

SURPRISE BITCHES

I'd like to thank Ironwolves21 (Author of: YHaY: Ballad of Nasty Jack, please go check it out) for helping me with this chapter!

Also here's some Walter art that I made!

The solar princess and her lunar sibling exchange glances between one another, both of their expressions filled with concern. Tension and unease grew across Twilight’s features, her eyes examining the now limp form of Walter as he lies motionless in the chair.

“This is odd… This isn’t the reaction I thought would happen.” Twilight says as she kneels down, cautiously reaching out to cup Walter’s face between her hands. Slowly she examined his blank expression while her own concern grew.

“This command we recovered from our sources, it was one of stationary order, yes? Is this not the reaction you anticipated?” Luna inquired in a clipped tone as she lifted a brow.

“Not exactly… From what our sources provided, the command I gave was supposed to just put him in a trance like state but still remain somewhat conscious, so we could gently question him.” Twilight explained, glancing over at Luna before returning her gaze to the unconscious human before her. “It’s like he just… Completely shut down.”

“Does this suggest that our source gave us faulty information?” Celestia asks, frowning slightly. Nobody in the room liked those implications, not in the slightest.

“I’m not sure, a lot of information surrounding this man is rather… Distorted. We don’t know exactly what’s true or false when it comes to him, which is why I was hoping we could get some information from his subconscious, assuming that he’s oblivious to everything going on around him”

Ponyville. Seemingly, quite lively at night, though not surprising since it’s the perfect time for thestrals and other nightlife to come out and start having some fun during the time of the gala. It also proved to be the perfect time for Jessica to infiltrate the masses without drawing too much attention.

It’d been a few days since Jessica ran afoul of the buffalo hillbillies, but having traced their tracks back to their mobile home, she’d been finally given a break. The hillbillies had quite the stockpile within their home; weapons, ammo, tools, food & water, and spare clothing were all enclosed within their mobile home. It certainly seemed that Jessica hadn’t been the only woman unfortunate enough to get within a hundred foot radius of those two, either that or they liked to dress up in womens clothing several sizes too small for them. But, the stains and tears on the clothes put that pipedream to rest quicker than Jessica had the pair.

While she couldn’t be of any help to their past victims, she felt that she’d done right by them in her vicious removal of their testicles. Small victories, right? Right.

After throwing on some civilian colors that were less tattered and stained than her own, Jessica picked over the accumulated gear and weapons. None of it would be any use to the castrated duo afterall. Once pleased, she took off in their jeep, leaving the carnage behind her. With the Jeep, she could almost taste the impending reunion. Or rather, that’s what she thought...

Upon arriving at Ponyville, she didn’t really know where Walter could be. But, knowing her brother’s habits, she decided to check the first place a big oaf like him would visit in a town like this: a bar.

It took some asking around, but eventually Jessica had found out where her brother may have visited recently. She managed to get some info from a local that he had seen a man fitting Walter’s description enter a karaoke bar with three colorful looking mares, it seems Walter has gotten quite ‘biz-ay’ since his arrival in Equestria, or at least that’s what Jessica would say just to make him all flustered.

This karaoke bar that the local had mentioned is a moderately sized building, two stories high covered in a black matte paint job with colorful murals of dancing, singing, and drinking ponies having a good time. Above the entrance to the bar is a neon sign in the shape of a microphone with a pink bow tied around the grip. Jessica looked over the building a bit while adjusting the hood over her head, entering the building while examining the colorful furniture and decorations around her.

“Welcome to Siren’s Lounge, how may I help ya darling?” Wilde calls out to Jessica with a warm smile..

“I’m looking for a human man; about six feet seven inches, three-hundred or so pounds, dark brown hair, dresses like he lives in the back alley of a Goodwill?” Jessica says as she leans up against the counter, revealing the bottom half of her face to the mare across from her.

“Yeah, I saw a guy like that not too long ago. What’s it to you, if I may ask?” Wilde inquired, tilting her head curiously.

“He’s family, we got separated a while back on our way into town. I’ve been looking for him for a while, I would call him but I’m afraid I’m out of minutes.” Jessica explains in a very friendly voice.

“Oh, are you his little sister?” Wilde asks.

“Nope, big sis, he’s my own little Baby Huey.” Jessica replied with a grin.

“Oh my… Just how old is he?” Wilde asked, seeming a tad flustered.

“Old enough to fuck, if that’s what you’re curious about.” Jessica replied, causing the older mare’s face to light up red.

“A-Ah, well, a-anyway, if you’re looking to find him you’ll probably find him at the Gala. I heard that all the Elements of Harmony are gonna be there, if they’re gonna be there then so is your brother, since they’re friends with him and all” Wilde explained.

“...Friends, eh?” Jessica murmured, furrowing her brow slightly. “Thanks for the info, babe, maybe I’ll drop by sometime and I can see what that pierced tongue can do” Jessica says as she turns around and walks out of the bar, leaving Wilde a hot steaming mess.

“Sister, I do not see this taking us anywhere constructive anytime soon. Perhaps we should postpone such experiments to a later date?” Luna suggests as Twilight tries to use a spell on Walter to diagnose what exactly happened.

“You have a point, sister. We all anticipated this scenario to go far more smoothly than it currently has unfolded. Twilight? Once you are finished, please make sure Mr. Barnes remains unaware of what unfolded tonight.” Celestia says as she turns her gaze from her sibling to Twilight, who seemed to hold a worried expression on her face. “Is something troubling you, my student?”

“Um, yes… I can’t find his memories. There’s… It’s like, he has hundreds of thousands of memories buried within his mind, it’s hard to locate which one is his precisely.” Twilight explains as Celestia and Luna cast one another a concerned glance.

“This is troubling news…” Celestia speaks softly as Twilight nods in agreement.

“I… I think I found some of his memories!” Twilight says as she then attempted to access the memory.

Suddenly, all sound leaves her ears, all that is left is the sound of a heartbeat. Darkness begins to creep up on her, surrounding her vision with blackness until she can no longer see any of her surroundings.

It felt as if somebody had forced her eyelids shut. She tried desperately to open her eyes, for the disappearance of her two main senses began to throw her into a panic. After what felt like several long minutes of panic, she was finally able to force her eyes back open, only this time she was no longer in the council room of the Ponyville Community Center, no, she was somewhere far far away… The Griffon Kingdom.

Or at least, that’s what she could guess based on the immense crowd of angry looking griffons standing before her, shouting, all of their voices merging into one unintelligible roar. Fear is the first thing that filled her, fear that eventually turned into confusion since none of their gazes seemed to be locked onto her, rather, somebody behind her.

Slowly turning around, Twilight stifles the urge to cry out in shock, covering her mouth, her eyes widening like dinner plates. Before her is Walter, but much younger than he is when she first met him, at least several pounds lighter. His hair is cut short, fashioned in a rugged crew cut and the goatee he has on his chin is nowhere to be seen on his shaved face. His youthful age spoke higher volumes without his facial hair, which is why it twisted Twilight’s heart to see his face covered in broken flesh, dried blood, and swollen bruises.

Walter was heavily restrained, trapped within a reinforced wooden pillory held together by fat iron nails and fittings. His eyes were drained of color and life, completely different from the warm and welcoming gaze he had when she first saw him. His wrists were bruised and bloody, most likely from the rusted iron shackles that kept his arms bound by chain.

Standing behind Walter were several heavily armed Imperial Officers, all of them dressed in combative uniform, all except for one, who wore a high ranking military fatigues, gripping a thorned whip in his clawed fist.

“Private First Class Walter Barnes, you are hereby discharged from the Legion permanently, and for your crimes of aggravated assault, attempted murder, and the hospitalization of ten of your fellow Imperial Guardsmen, you are to be reprimanded at the full extent of the law. Under most circumstances, scum like you are left to the judgement of the victim’s families. However, thanks to the kind generosity of the Crown, you have been given a pardon, under the condition that you endure the punishment of thirty-five lashes before the public eye.” The well dressed griffon man says as he slowly steps over and kneels down, leaning his beak next to Walter’s ear. “If you beg for mercy, and grovel at my feet… I will reduce your sentence to twenty-five lashes.” the griffon says with a sadistic smile stretched across their beak.

“Your son screamed like a little bitch while I shattered his beak with my boot, asshole…” Walter choked out, spitting a wad of blood at the griffon man’s feet before returning to his aggressive staring contest with the stage floor beneath him.

“Have it your way, you filthy ape.” the griffon hissed venomously, a visible scowl splashed across his features as he quickly stepped behind Walter, moving back several feet before unravelling the gruesome looking thorned whip.

“No! Please!” Twilight called out desperately, running between Walter and the Imperial Officer. “You can’t do this, he’s just a boy! You can’t!” Twilight pleaded, but her voice seemed to fall on deaf ears. She flinched as the officer slung back his hand before thrusting his fist forward, lashing the whip aggressively. The thorned whip phased through her completely, as if she were a ghost, and clashed with Walter’s exposed back with a loud crack mixed in with the sickening squelch of Walter’s flesh being shredded mercilessly.

“GRH!” Walter muffled his cry of pain, his entire body jolting forward in agony, trying to escape the white hot pain eating away at the torn flesh on his back. He gritted his teeth, clenching his fists until his knuckles were bone-white.

“NO!” Twilight cried out, watching in helpless horror as Walter is flogged over and over again. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion, blood and tears splattered against the concrete stage along with chunks of flesh. Soon enough Walter could no longer stifle his screams of pain, his agonizing cry of misery shook the air like the explosions of cannon fire.

Twilight tried to use healing magic, desperately trying to light up her horn with her violet aura, but no such thing would happen. She could not use any magic, she could not interfere with the horrific torture Walter was enduring. Not once however, did Walter beg for mercy, not once did he cry out for them to stop. His screams were of pain, this is true, but they almost sounded as if he were… Laughing. A toothy grin was spread across his face, his bloodshot eyes aimed directly at the crowd before him, obviously intending to make them uneasy… Which seemed to be working based on the disconcerted gazes the crowd was giving.

By the time the officer had reached the final lash, Walter’s entire back was covered in torn and abused flesh soaked in blood. Twilight’s voice had left her, it was stuck at the bottom of her throat, held back by the inability to choose whether she should scream or cry. Beads of tears raced down her cheeks as she held her hands over her mouth, holding back the urge to vomit, hunched over with her back facing Walter.

Twilight’s mind was racing; fear, shock, horror, and awe. She was at a loss of words, or rather, the ability to speak was robbed entirely from her. Her body shook, trembling like an autumn leaf. All she could do was just stand there and watch as Walter was flogged, she was overwhelmed by a feeling she had not felt in a long time… Helplessness.

As Walter is removed from the pilloy and thrown to the concrete floor of the stage, darkness would once again begin to consume her sight. It seems the memory was over, considering Walter was most likely losing consciousness after enduring so much abuse. A small wave of relief washed over Twilight, for the horrible memory was finally over… But what she saw would always be imprinted within her mind.

“Twilight? Twilight!” Celestia called out for her protege in alarm, raising from her seat and approaching the unicorn in her tranced out state. Upon reaching Twilight and kneeling down Celestia is met with the horrified expression that had framed itself firmly on the unicorn’s visage. Twilight’s eyes glowed a dull blue light, signifying that this trance she was in involved magic somehow. Obviously she had been sucked into Walter’s memories, something that usually happens when a unicorn is not careful with memory altering spells.

“Twilight? Twilight can you hear me?” Celestia spoke worriedly, placing her hands on Twilight’s shoulders, gently shaking them. The concern for her student grew even greater as tears began to pour down Twilight’s face like a broken faucet.

“N-No! Please!” Twilight would cry out, struggling weakly to reach out, her hands desperately grasping for Walter. “You can’t do this! He’s just a boy! You can’t!” the unicorn cries out as she tries to reach out for Walter, a strong instinct to protect radiating from the powerful look of helplessness strewn across her face.

Celestia’s horn lights up in a golden aura, she had no other choice at the moment but to forcibly pull Twilight from Walter’s memories. Whatever was happening, obviously it had destroyed any ounce of stability Twilight’s composure had to offer. With surgical precision, Celestia manages to drag Twilight free from the memory, bringing her back to reality. Twilight awakens with a loud gasp,cold sweat beading down her face as her composure slowly reforms, allowing the visibly shaken unicorn to gradually calm down. Being in the arms of her mentor was also an aiding factor in this.

“Twilight, what did you see?” Celestia inquired, still cradling the smaller mare within her arms.

“...A bit of Walter’s past it seems. I let my guard down and… I got sucked in. I shouldn’t have been so careless.” Twilight mutters as she slowly pulls herself onto her feet, adjusting her dress before casting Walter a disconcerted stare.

“Accessing Walter’s memories holds more risk than it does benefit. Perhaps we should try another approach…” Celestia says as she stood up along with Twilight, concern still evident on her visage.

“Another approach… I may have an idea, but it would require a lot of your time, Princess Luna” Twilight says, the Lunar diarch perking up in attention.

“What would that be?” Luna inquired.

“His dreams; if we were to access his dreams, and subtly guide his subconscious to reveal the information we need, then no harm would be done, we could document the outcomes, and Walter would not get suspicious. He would most likely conclude that he’s been experiencing an odd array of dreams. But to be on the safe side, we should limit to how often we manipulate his dreams.” Twilight concludes while Celestia and Luna exchanging thoughtful glances before returning their gazes to Twilight.

“I approve of your proposal. In another time, we shall resume such experiments, in the meantime, it would be best if we return Walter to the land of the living, yes?” Luna says with a hand gesture to the limp body of Walter.

“Yes, Twilight if you may” Celestia nods in agreement.

With a firm nod, Twilight turns to Walter, taking in a shaky breath before slowly and clearly speaking.

“Oscar. Alpha. Epsilon. Beta.”

And with that, Walter’s empty eyes slowly regained their life, however they quickly fell closed. Convenient too, it was easier this way, having him unconscious would give them enough time to move his person somewhere less conspicuous.

Suddenly, a loud commotion coming from the hallway outside the room draws the attention of all three of them. By the sound of it, there was two voices trading hostile threats with one another. One was a male’s voice, and the other, a female’s.

Ashfall leaned idly up against the wall adjacent from the twin doors leading to the council rooms his charge had just entered. It would seem that his presence was requested by Twilight, but as to why she would isolate Walter like this was beyond him. As of now his only chore was to stand guard outside the room, and make sure nobody got lost and tried to wander mistakenly into the room. Why they couldn’t have a pack of REMF’s do it, was beyond both his imagination and pay grade. He had been standing there in silence for several long minutes, swirling the freshly acquired slab of nicotine gum around idly in his mouth as he waited..

The sound of approaching footsteps came to his attention, it wasn’t the first pair of footsteps he had heard in the past twenty minutes, beforehand it was simply that thestral mare from earlier patrolling around the hallways. It usually takes her roughly five minutes to make her rounds in the small maze of corridors. However, it seems like something had slowed her down, or had her distracted, considering she hadn’t passed by in the past ten minutes. Glancing upward to see if the thestral had returned to her patrol, he is met with an unexpected sight.

A woman, a human woman, standing no taller than five and a half feet tall. Her frame is built like that of a professional wrestler. Despite her shrouded attire, Ashfall could clearly observe the empowered physique that lies underneath those ragged clothes, especially those legs of hers. She looks like she could launch sputnik into space just by kicking it as hard as she could. Sensing a tense aura coming from this woman, Ashfall centers himself in the middle of the hallway, acting as an obvious obstacle between this mysterious woman and the room behind him. He slowly clasped his hands behind his back, to look both professional, and to unclasp the catch on his sidearm.

“Oho?” the woman grins, the lower half of her face being the only visible part of her visage. “You’re different from the other guards aye? A frail old stallion, but a skilled one at that, I see. I like a challenge…” the woman says as she cracks her knuckles and neck, before letting out a slow sigh. “But unfortunately, I have no time to play with you… According to those I asked around with, Walter is in that room. I promise I won’t hurt you too much if you stand down right now…” the woman says, her tone shifting from playful to dark and serious real quick.

“Hnn…You know, the Gala is invite only..” Ashfall remarks with a deadpan growl, narrowing his eyes as he slowly adjusted his stance into a combative pose. Mild surprise struck as the woman drew a pistol from a holster concealed in her ratty clothes, but decades of training and combat saw her staring down the barrel of a .45 USP as she fixed a 9mm for his center mass. Or at least, that’s what would have happened if his decades of service hadn’t caught up to him in the face of youthful exuberance.

“Ah-ah, down, on the floor.” The woman motioned with her pistol. “Like I said. I am in a hurry. I don’t have time to play with you.” The woman says coldly as Ashfall narrows his eyes, cursing himself silently.

“What exactly is your relationship with Walter?” Ashfall inquires, setting his sidearm down on the marble floors. She was only a few meters away, all he needed, was a distraction.

“He’s my-”

A shrill ear piercing shriek caused her to flinch as a maid spotted the stand off, and began screaming her head off. It cost her a second of attention, but a second was all Ash ever needed. Lifting his pistol with the toe of his dress shoes, Ashfall flicked the 861 gram weapon at the woman as he went low. Spells took moments and he only had one. As the woman swiftly recovered from her own surprise and trained the pistol barrel on him, his small spell went off, and a tiny jolt of telekinesis flicked her safety on. Tackling her hard at the midsection, Ashfall drove air from her lungs as the pair crashed into the wall, the gun lost between them.

“Hah! Keep this up you old fuck and I might have to take you for a rut!” the woman remarks with a hyena’s cackle, sucking air into her lungs as fast as she could manage while pushing herself and Ash away from the wall, giving her just enough footroom to bring her right leg back and drive her knee into Ashfall’s pelvis. She repeated the strike enough to shake Ashfall’s grip enough for her to pull herself into a more advantageous position. She draws her head back and strikes her forehead hard into Ashfall’s jaw, resulting in a welt to form at the top front of her forehead.

“Try to keep up, Kid.” She’d given him all the time he needed, five moments and a half breath. His horn flashed and banged, blinding her as he drew into her guard and delivered a piston driven straight to her jaw. His horn flashed and banged again within the span of a second, dazzling her eyes as he grabbed her arm and hip tossed her to the ground, twisting the limb the wrong way as she fell. His horn continued to flash and bang, filling the hall with chaos.

“Nffg! Fuck… This is almost getting me wet!” she groans under her breath, gritting her teeth as she twisted and contorted her body, her arm may not be any use to her at the moment but she had other limbs to work with. Warping her body, slithering her powerful thighs and muscular calves around Ashfall’s body, she manages to turn herself around, dislocating her entrapped arm in the process, giving her just enough room to place Ashfall in a vice-like grip between her two thighs, clamping down hard on his windpipe with her pillars of hard muscular flesh. “Hope you don’t mind the musk! I haven’t-- nnffg-- had too many chances to bathe!” she remarks with a wheezing chuckle.

With his head trapped between the mystery woman’s thighs and all air cut off from his brain, Ashfall’s options were brutally small. He could always wait her out until guards came running to investigate the racket, but then they’d see him like this. No, he was going to fight, and if there was ever one thing he was good at, it was fighting. Flicking his dress shoe, the short, five inch blade jutted from the heel. Bringing his leg up hard and fast, he struck her across the face with his heel, before bringing it back and driving the blade into her shoulder. The shock of the wound caused her grip to slacken just so, enough to get air back to his brain, and finish a quick combat spell. Electric energy coiled around his fingers as he grabbed the tendons behind her knee, and dumped fifty thousand volts into the back of her leg.

“GNNAAAAFFUCK!” The woman cried out in a violent hissing screech, the shock of the electric current causing her legs to unfoil from Ashfall’s neck almost instantly. Acting quickly on her reflexes, she strikes Ashfall in the center of his back during her descent to the marble floor. She tuck-and-rolls a good distance from Ashfall, and after regaining her footing, she locks her predatory gaze onto the older stallion once more. “You fuckass…” she snarls bitterly, gritting her teeth as she forcibly pops her dislocated arm back into place. Quickly she rips her hooded jacket from her shoulders, throwing it into Ashfall’s peripheral vision. This provides her with a window, giving her just enough time to launch a sprinting tackle into Ashfall’s center mass. The force of her tackle grants the momentum required to lift Ashfall off the ground, her aimless tackle guiding them both straight through the twin doors behind Ashfall, carrying him several feet before dropping him hard in the center of the room.

Gasps of surprise went up around the room as the fighting pair crashed through, still locked in combat. “Punk ass-” Ashfall snarled as he fought her for mount.

“Old ass-” Jessica growled back as she tried to dig her thumbs into his eyes, only to have to defend her own.

“ENOUGH!” Celestia’s booming voice rocked the room as a squad of royal guards came galloping to.

Looking up from the clinch, Ashfall huffed lightly. “Evening, Princesses. Elements. Don’t mind me, just taking out the trash.”

“What in Equestria’s name is the meaning of this?!” Celestia barked, both her and Luna marching forward with their horns lit up in their respective radiating auras.

“Would you believe me if I told you two I’m here to sell girl scout cookies?” the mystery woman remarked jokatively, snickering while she remained locked in a stalemate with Ashfall.

“You have got to be the worst girl scout I’ve ever met. Stop squirming so I can stab you again.” Ashfall grunted in mild displeasure.

“Keep your limp old man dick away from my ass you dusty fuck” the woman spat in return. Suddenly the two would become enveloped in magic aura, the mystery woman in Celestia’s golden aura, and Ashfall in Luna’s turquoise magic. They are forcibly separated from each other, Ashfall being set across the room next to the royal guards who had barged into the room after the outburst began. Celestia hovers the mystery woman closer to her, casting a shadow over the small human female with her powerful authoritative radiance.

“I am Princess Celestia, Diarch of Equestria. And, who might you be, little one?” The duality of her voice against the authoritarian aura she emitted caused the woman to completely pause, caught up in the magic of the moment. “Well?”

The human woman pauses under the authoritative gaze of Celestia, her sarcastic demeanor bleeding away into a more serious stature. Before words could leave the mystery woman’s parted lips, a soft yet deep masculine voice breaks the silence deafening the room.

“...Jessica?”

There’s that feeling again, the feeling of my head being held under water after having it rapidly struck with a blunt object. My ears ring, I can practically feel my brain cells clamoring around inside my skull trying to set my mind straight again. It feels like I am trapped inside my own head, swimming around in a pool of chilled molasses.

My mind slowly begins to clear itself, the thick gelatinous mass that is my brain slowly diluting into a more sensible state of conscious, allowing me to slowly orientate my senses. The first thing to reach my comprehension was that I was postured limply on a structure of some sort, most likely a chair. My ears were still ringing, and I couldn’t muster the strength to open my eyes fully. All I could make sense of my surrounding was the blurred movement of three colorful figures presumably conversing with one another. As time passes however, two more blurred figures enter the room, resulting in the previous three figures to move more erratically.

The ringing slowly begins to fade away as time progresses, and soon enough the ringing had died down enough for me to make out voices. The voices were unintelligible for a few minutes until I could make out the frustrated voice of a woman.

“I am Princess Celestia, Diarch of Equestria. And, who might you be, little one?” The woman’s voice speaks sharply. That name quickly resonates recognition within my mind, and I slowly drag my head to face the origin of her voice. “Well?”

As I begin to peel my eyelids open more and more, my vision clears and a peculiar sight is revealed before me. Before me is Celestia, who I remember is one of the two leaders of Equestria, standing with her hands on her hips, her footlong horn enveloped in a golden aura, an expression of frustration and impatience strewn across her visage.

After soaking in Celestia’s appearance, my gaze shifts to the woman dressed in ragged clothing before the solar alicorn. She is short, no doubt about it. I’m mad that it took me this long to process her face, but… I know her. I’ve known her for a long time. This woman… She’s… She’s my…

I force my body to stand from the chair I was slumped over, my knees shaking slightly under the stress of my body weight. My eyes lock onto the small human woman in shock, disbelief. Tears begin to form, blurring my already hazy vision, but despite this I could still make her out.

“Jessica…?” I managed to choke out in a soft and tired tone of voice.

All the attention in the room shifts from Jessica to me, but I could care less. I walk past Twilight, who I now just noticed was standing to the right of me while I was slumped in the chair. I completely ignore both of the insanely powerful alicorn diarchs, standing less than a foot away from my sibling now as she stares at me with an equal gaze of shock and excitement.

“Hey there Little Bear! Glad to see you’re still in one pe-” before Jessica had the chance to say anything else, she is interrupted by my massive arms wrapping around her form, yanking her free of Celestia’s telekinetic grasp. Jessica squeaks as I squeeze down on her, burying my face into the crook of her neck while my eyes leak tears like broken faucets. Jessica remains silent, apart from wincing in pain, not saying a word as she slowly relaxes within my grasp while I hold her two feet off the ground, embracing her in what appears to be an inescapable bear hug. “I missed ya too, big guy…” Jessica whispers as she rests her chin on my shoulder.

Across the room, Ashfall could only mutter and shake his head as all the mares smiled at the show of affection. “I need a fucking smoke…”

“So I take it that… You are Jessica Barnes?” Twilight interjects, approaching Jessica and I while I continued to keep my face hidden within Jessica’s neck. My sister manages to shift her gaze over to Twilight, showing a small grin.

“That’d be me”

“Reports say that you went missing three days before your train arrived at Appleloosa, would you mind answering a few of our questions? That is, after your brother here decides to release you” Celestia says, gesturing to me.

“That’s gonna be awhile, Princess. Whatever questions you have Little Bear will mostly ask me as well so you might as well ask me here” Jessica says a she wiggles a bit to try and adjust to a more comfortable position, but sighs in defeat considering my arms would not budge.

“Very well. Would you care to explain all that occurred over the past two weeks?” Celestia inquired.

I didn’t even listen while Jessica explained all that happened to her over the past two weeks, I was just glad she was here, that I had family close to me again. While she rambled on back and forth with the solar alicorn, I noticed that the royal guards that were gathered near the entrance of the room began to make their approach. They paused though after I gave them the look of death, though, I’m sure that whatever gesture Luna made might have had more of an effect..

“Little Bear, I caused quite a mess. I was reckless, now I have to own up to it” Jessica says as she pulls on my ear.

“But… You just got here!” I protested, slowly setting her down. Jessica winces once again in pain, holding onto her bleeding shoulder, a look of realization falling onto her face as if she just now remembered how she got that wound.

“It’ll be alright Little Bear, I won’t be gone for long. I just have to take responsibility for what I did. Once things are cleared up things will be relatively back to normal” Jessica explains as she smiles up at me.

“But… But…” I fumble over my words, staring down at her like a kicked puppy.

“Awe come on Little Bear, you know it’s hard to say no to you when you look at me like that” Jessica laughs softly, reaching up with a non-bloody hand, cupping my cheek with it. “How about you and I go have a brother and sister day after I sort my shit out?” she proposes, flashing a toothy grin my way.

“...Aaaaaagh….. Alright, alright… Okay” I nodded, sniffling a bit, rubbing my face as I lean down and hug her once again.

“You look fuckin’ sexy in that suit, by the way” Jessica remarks, reaching down with a free hand, squeezing a good handful of my butt.

“AYEE!” I screeched, yanking myself away from her, holding my posterior with a bright red blush on my face.

It seems everybody in the room shares the same expression of disbelief toward Jessica, except for Ashfall, he just looks tired and grumpy.

“Time for me to go now, toodles~” Jessica snickered as she walked over towards the guards, allowing them to slap a pair of cuffs onto her while they lead her out of the room and down the hall.

“Damn it Jess, you had to ruin a good moment…” I muttered, my hands still covering my backside. “...Hey, what am I doing in here again?” I asked as I glanced around, noticing how I was in a council room rather than the ballroom. Last I remember I was sitting down at a table stuffing my face with finger foods and washing it all down with wine.

“You were very drunk,” Twilight began.

Oh, that explains it…

“And since you seemed to be losing the strength to stand upright I would bring you here to rest up until you were in a better state of mind” Twilight explained with a sheepish smile.

“...But why are they here?” I asked, gesturing towards Celestia and Luna.

“Well… I needed to talk with them anyways, so I figured I’d have you rest in here while I did so”

“You mean… While I was drunk, you thought it would be a good idea to bring me into a room of the two ruling diarchs of Equestria…?” I asked, staring at Twilight with wide eyes of embarrassment.

“...Yes?”

“...Oh god” I slam my face within my hands, “The first time I get to meet the princesses and I’m under the influence!” I groaned quietly while Twilight attempted to comfort me by hesitantly rubbing my back.

“If it is of any consolement, we did not mind your presence. You were still very sweet and quite adorable, even while tipsy” Luna interjected, causing my face to grow an even darker shade of red.

“Yes, I do agree” Celestia responded, a playful smirk crossing her lips.

“Gaaaaaah! I’m so sorry your majesties! I gotta go scream in the bathroom now!” I say, bowing my head quickly to both of them before I took off running out of the room.

Why me?

I quickly make a mad dash to the bathroom, making my way past a few guards getting chewed out by a higher ranking guard. I didn’t particularly care about what was going on nor was it my business, so I just kept marching onward until I entered the bathroom, which thankfully was empty.

I pull off my cotton gloves, tucking them into my pockets before turning on one of the sinks across from the bathroom stalls. I lean over and begin splashing my hot flustered face, groaning lowly as the cold water begins to cool me off a bit.

I hear one of the stall doors behind me open, I don’t hear anybody leave the stall for a few minutes, but soon I can feel a presence approaching me from my left.

“Um, you doin’ okay there Walt?” I hear a familiar voice speak up from behind me.

“R-Rainbow Dash?” I quickly turn around, meeting face to face with my cyan pegasus friend, both of us sharing an awkward blush. “Umm… I got the wrong bathroom, didn’t I?” I asked, smiling sheepishly.

“Yup, seems like it” Dash replied as she walked up next to me, washing her hands as well as her face.

“I’m terribly sorry, I must’ve not been paying attention.” I say apologetically while Dash simply waves me off.

“No problem, big guy. How about you tell me what’s goin’ on? You seem to be… Well, I dunno, you look like a dog who just got whacked in the nose with a rolled up newspaper” Dash explains as she leans herself against the sink, glancing over at me.

“It’s… A long story” I say as I rub the back of my head.

“How about we talk about it outside the mares bathroom? The girls and I are hanging out at a table outside the mob of brown-nosers. Why not join us?” Dash offers with a smile.

“That… Would be good” I say with a small smile. After that Dash leads me out of the mares restroom, guiding me down the hall back to the ballroom. The ponies seemed to have been a bit stirred up by some of the commotion that apparently went down. Knowing that my sister was apparently in trouble, the commotion was probably started by her. I give a sigh as I approach a table full of mares, most of them I recognize: Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Applejack, and who I assume to be Rarity considering I recognize her voice from when I spoke to her over the phone. As we approached Pinkie Pie launched herself at me, giving me a firm bear hug that almost squeezed the air out of my lungs.

“Walter! Where have you been? We thought you left early!” Pinkie Pie declares as she looks up at me with puffed up cheeks, looking like some stereotypical girl from an anime pretending like she was upset.

“I… Guess I had too much to drink?” I respond.

“You sound unsure of that answer” Dash says as she takes a seat. I pull up a chair and sit down as well, giving a shrug.

“I dunno, last thing I remember is sitting at a table with my new Guardian, eating and drinking, then all the sudden everything went blank. That’s all I can remember” I say with a shrug.

“Told’ya you should take it easy on the booze~” Applejack teasingly quipped.

“Says the mare who got shitfaced and went viral by grinding your ass on a human man in front of a crowd of drunk college students. That video has almost half a million views on youtube now.” Dash says as she takes a seat at the table along with me, causing Applejack to blush a bit with a sheepish smile.

“Oh yeah… I forgot about that.” I mumble as I rubbed my head. Rarity nearly chokes on her drink, coughing a bit as she covers her mouth, losing herself in a small giggling fit.

“That was you?” Rarity laughs, causing both Applejack and I to grow red in the face. “Oh don’t worry darling, I’m only jesting. It’s nice to finally meet you Walter, I heard great things about you from my sister Sweetie Belle.” Rarity says with a friendly smile.

“Oh?” I tilted my head curiously, I didn’t know Sweetie Belle all that long, so I wonder what kind of impression I left on her during my time there.

“Oh yes, she says you have a nice firm ass.” Rarity remarks, causing Dash and Applejack to nearly spit take while I hide my blushing face between my hands.

Of course...

“Can we stop talking about my ass? I don’t really feel all that comfortable with my ass being objectified like a piece of meat!” I say in a whimper.

“Welcome to the club.” Dash says as she takes a swig of her drink.

Silence falls upon our table aside from the occasional idle small talk that would branch into a discussion of some sort. I kinda tuned it all out after a while, my thoughts reached elsewhere at the moment. All I could think about was Jessica, and why exactly she had risked getting into as much trouble as she did to find me if I just passed out drunk and was taken off to another room. Then again, I was taken to a room with two of the most powerful beings in Equestria, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna…

Wait a minute…

Things are starting to make less and less sense here. If I were simply passed out drunk, wouldn’t I be taken to a less populated corner of the ballroom like I already was in? Maybe the girls would arrange for me to be taken back home or some shit like that? But no, instead I was taken to a room containing the two most important people in this country, and not only that but I woke up to my sister being interrogated by Celestia. Jessica would never use excessive force unless she believed her family was in danger. And the fact that she’s facing legal punishments for apparent violent actions, can only lead me to believe that…

I did not pass out drunk, I was in that room for a reason, something was done to me and Twilight as well as the two diarchs of Equestria are lying to me.

But why?