I waited for something to happen. A sign that I can still get out of this void. Then it happened. I heard voices, voices that talk about something.

“Should we start?” One asked.

“Yes, this is the only way he can remember.” Another replied.

“Is he aware of us?” The first voice asked again.

“He is aware, after all, we are his voices that linger behind his mind. We are the voices he had shut off a long time ago, in an attempt to erase his beginnings,” The second voice answered. “We are the ghosts of his past.”

“Yes, I’m afraid you’re right. He tried to forget about what happened to him, his friends, and his family. All because of The Great War. Then let us begin! It’s time for him to remember, even if it will be little. Once he knows more about his past, it’s up to him to find the rest,” The first agreed. “Before he gets corrupted like the others.”

As soon as the conversation ended, bright light replaced the haunting darkness. Then a pathway formed beneath me, building a path towards door in front of me.

“Go to the door. Don’t be afraid.” It told me soothingly.

I walked towards the door, scared of what’s behind it. As I move closer, I started to hear even more voices.

Then a malicious laughter. It shushed every voice in the void, an eerie silence settling once more. I looked behind me and gasped. The darkness was engulfing the light slowly. Scared, I ran towards the door. I braced myself and smashed through it.

“AJ, I’m back!”

I entered the barn, looking around for the mare that usually wears a hat.

“Applejack?”

There was no one I could see in the barn. It was just empty. I sighed and turned around. When I did, I finally found her.

“Hey there, AJ!” I greeted her. She smiled at me.

“What brings you here?” She asked me, tilting her head. “It’s not even noon yet.”

“I’m just here to tell you about the results from Twilight’s tests. You know, she insisted me to do it, to see if we really are related,” I answered her. “Worst mistake of my life. I can’t believe she can deal with some experiments that is really weird.”

“Yeah, hopefully it’s not too crazy,” She said, smiling a bit.

“It is crazy!” I exclaimed. “Especially this one experiment. It involved...a lot of touching.”

“Whoa whee, let’s just skip to the results,” She quickly told me.

“Okay, so according to her...it’s a 50-50,” I told her. “It’s either I’m your cousin or I’m just a family friend.”

“Oh wow, that was unexpected,” She fixed her hat and sighed. “Well, so how should we call each other, friend or cousin?”

“I don’t know. I’m not really good at making a choice so you pick,” I replied, smiling sheepishly.

“How about...cousins?” She answered. “I feel comfortable with that, how about you?”

“Yeah, I’m okay with it,” I replied. “At least I have someone to call ‘cousin’. Back then, I barely knew anyone that’s related to me, other than my parents of course.”

She nodded and gives me a pat on the back.

“Hey, AJ?”

“Yeah?”

“You can speak to me normally, with the accent,” I told her. “Why are you trying so hard to hide it when you’re speaking to me or my parents?”

“Aww, shucks. I’ll be honest with you. It’s because you and your parents are from the city,” She replied. “When I was young, I once went to visit my aunt and uncle. They’re city folks so you can say they are ‘sophisticated’. Anyways, when I was there, they told me to lose my accent ‘cause… We’re in the city. So when I met you...Well, you can guess.”

“AJ, just because I’m from the city doesn’t mean you should talk to me like Rarity,” I told her. “Just be yourself.”

“I guess you’re right,” She smiled one more time and chuckled. “Ah shouldn’t act like Rarity. That was a pain in th’flank t’speak like that.”

I smirked and grabbed her hat, putting it on as quickly as possible. She looked at me with confusion. I arched my eyebrow at her, smiling smugly.

“Hey, what was that for?” She asked me, annoyed.

“Ya know, t’annoy ya,” I replied.

“Oh, just give me back mah hat!” She demanded.

“Ya better come and get it then, sugarcube!” I quickly galloped towards the apple orchards. She ran after me, trying to catch me and grab her hat. We ran and ran and ran…

“My, my, darling, what are you doing?” A white unicorn asked me as she tried to look over my shoulder to see what I was trying to make.

“Oh hey, Rarity,” I greeted her. “I’m just making a gift for your sister. She seemed to like one of the stuffs I made so I decided to make this thing for her birthday.”

“You do know that Sweetie Belle’s birthday is still a few months away, right?” She continued to look at what I was making.

“I just wanted to have enough time to perfect this,” I answered her. “I want to make sure that this can survive a really long time. maybe one day it can remind her about her young self.”

“Aww, how sweet. You really are thoughtful,” She complimented me.

“Uhm, yeah. Thanks for your kind words,” I smiled, feeling a bit happier than before. I stopped my work to rest for a while, grabbing a nearby towel to wipe the sweat off my forehead. I felt a hoof rest upon my shoulder and I looked back to see Rarity a bit too close.

“Whoa, hey there,” I smiled awkwardly. “What brings you here so close to, uhm, invading my personal space?”

“Oh, am I really that close to you?” She moved back a few inches away from me. “I’m really sorry, darling. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable.”

She smirked at me. I just stared blankly at her.

“Uhm, yeah. It’s okay...yup,” I muttered mindlessly.

“Oh, darling, did I break you?” She cooed. I started to babble random words in an attempt to answer. Nope, I was really broken.

“I’m just teasing, darling!” She laughed.

“Oh, eheh,” I nervously laughed along.

“Mmm, say, did you ever find a mare worth your time?” She asked me.

“W-What do you mean by that?” I stammered.

“You know what I meant by that,” She told me, smiling. “You're a very handsome stallion, and I expected you to have someone to live your life with.”

“I...I...I’m not ready for that kind of thing yet,” I placed my face on my hooves. “Why do you ask? Don’t tell me that you-”

“No no no no no!” She quickly responded, her eyes wide. “I’m not implying that I, ahem, like you. Just curious, that’s all. Can’t a mare ask a stallion about love without receiving such kinds of responses from him?”

I shrugged and looked back at my work. I should have expected that question one day, seeing that it’s nearly Hearts and Hooves day. I could just stay inside my house, or more accurately, in the basement. As I let my thoughts wander around, Rarity decided to clear her throat just to grab my attention.

“What is it?” I asked her.

“Oh nothing,” She replied. “I just want to know if you are deciding in finding your true love eventually.”

“I don’t think I’ll find anyone that can relate to me,” I said with a chuckle. “Maybe when I’m more comfortable with talking to other ponies.”

“Yes, I’m afraid you need to try to improve on your social skills,” She agreed. “Anyways, I better get going. I still have to fetch my sister and help her with her school project. See you tomorrow.”

I nodded and waved her goodbye. Once she was gone, I decided to clean up the place. It was a mess, tools and materials were strewn all over the place. While I was cleaning, I noticed a purple blur at the corners of my eyes. I turned to look at it and was surprised to see the assistant of Twilight in the room with me. How did he even get here?

“Spike?” I looked at him with confusion. “What are you doing here?”

I was back at the hospital, getting my back massaged by a nurse. I could have gone to a more appropriate place for a back massage but I had a perfectly good excuse to be in a hospital. I happened to push my body a bit too much on a race against Rainbow Dash. I don’t even know why I did it, it sounded fun to me at that time. Yeah, so by the time the race is over, my whole body was ready to fall apart. Was that a good excuse?

“Next time, don’t race with a pegasus,” The nurse sternly told me. “That was stupid of you to do that.”

“I know…” My ears drooped. I was not having a good day.

“Good that you know,” She continued to pound on my back, a bit stronger than before. “I wish you had thought it through though. My job may involve taking care of injured or sick ponies but I know it doesn’t involve massaging. Why am I even assigned to take care of you?”

“Do you have to speak to me that way?” I groaned. “I already know racing with a pegasus is bad. You don’t have to make me feel worse by making me feel sorry for you.”

She sighed and moved on to my limbs. This time, the force she’s exerting is much weaker.

“Well, I’m sorry if I sound rude to you,” She apologized. “I’m just having a really bad day today.”

“You’re not the only one with a bad day…” I muttered. “At least you’re not the one that is being scolded for doing a stupid thing.”

“I just lost 2 patients today, how does that sound?” She said heavily. “Still having a worse day than me?”

“Whoa...I didn’t know. Sorry…” Now I feel bad for comparing my day to her’s.

“No need to feel bad, happens most of the time in this kinds of places,” She told me.

She finally finished massaging me. I felt more relaxed now than before. Actually, this would be the only time I was this relaxed.

“How are you feeling?” she asked me. “Feeling better than before I presume?”

“Totally,” I said happily.

“Good, now will you please get off the bed,” She requested. “You can’t stay there all day you know.”

“Sure,” I yawned. “In a minute. For now, maybe we can talk?”

“And why do you want me to talk to you?” She asked, eyebrow raised.

“We’re already doing it so why not?” I told her, smiling. “We don’t need to talk about our lives, I’m fine with just a friendly conversation.”

“I don’t see why not,” She grabs a chair nearby and sits. “I don’t think I need to do anything after this anyways. ”

Inside, I high-fived myself for finally having the courage to speak to a stranger. It was even a mare! Better yet, we found a comfortable and relatable topic we could talk about. I felt good to finally try to socialize with others, I must have missed a lot of golden opportunities when I decided to stay silent.

We talked for a long time. A minute turned into 30 minutes. 30 turned to 60. And then hours flew by. I didn’t even know you can hold a conversation for hours. I decided to check the clock that was hanging on the wall to see the time.

“What?!” I exclaimed. “We’ve been talking for 3 hours? How’s that even possible?!”

“3 hours?” She also looked at the clock and gasped. “That’s way too long for a simple conversation.”

I quickly got out of the bed, though the amount of time my body stood still made my limbs stiff. So instead of landing on the floor with my legs, I landed on the floor with my face instead. The nurse quickly rushed to my side.

“Oh my Celestia, are you alright?” She worriedly asked me.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I assured her. “Just give me sometime to get my limbs moving again.”

She did not give me time to move on my own. Instead, she helped me up. I kinda objected to that but she wouldn’t listen to me so I gave up. Once I can finally walk on my own hooves, she let go.

“Thanks for helping me,” I thanked her. “But it wasn’t necessary to do that.”

“Well, as a nurse, I have to help anyone that needs help,” She points at her nurse hat. “And by the look at your face when you hit the floor, you really needed help.”

“Then thanks for being so thoughtful,” I smiled at her, awkwardly. I noticed I’ve been smiling a lot lately.

“Hey, that’s what I do,” She smiled back at me. “If you want to try another race against a pegasus, you know where to find me.”

“Great! But I’ll need your name first if I were to consult you,” I told her with a wink.

“My name is...Just call me Nurse Redheart,” She looked at me as if she knows what I’m trying to do,“What’s your name?”

“Me? My name is-

“War…” I stared at the mirror, studying myself. “...It just had to happen.”

I was tired, my work taking up all night to be finished. For a moment, I looked like my dad. I was thinking of talking to him over breakfast when I remembered he was one of the ponies that volunteered to join the army.

I went downstairs to the dining area, expecting mom to be waiting for me there. But when I arrive at said area, the only thing that was waiting for me was a plate of pancakes. Pancakes? Why not?

“Mom?” I looked at the pancakes. She must have went somewhere. She usually does this everyday ever since dad left.

I took a sit and started munching on my breakfast, thinking about random things. Maybe I should try different mane styles, you know, to change my look a bit. My friends always complained about how I always look the same. I could also try baking muffins or maybe even go further and bake a cake.

I looked at the calendar that was placed on the wall. I noticed a number that was circled repeatedly with an arrow pointing at the date. Strange, I thought, what’s so important about that date?

“Oh no…” I slapped myself. Of course! It was Mom’s birthday today and I haven’t greeted her yet. I quickly finished what’s left of my pancakes and placed the plate in the sink.

Maybe I could get Pinkie to help me with setting up a surprise party. She is pretty good at it after all. With these thoughts in mind, I hurried to prepare myself, trying to make myself as decent as one could get when it gets to going out. Grabbing my saddlebag, I rushed towards the door. I opened it and was surprised to find the mail mare looking as shocked as I was.

“Ditzy! Do I have mail?” I quickly asked her. “If I do, please give it to me now. I’m in a bit of a rush.”

“Oh, uhm, yes…” She looked a bit worried or even sad. She reached in her saddlebag and gave me a letter. “I”m really sorry for what happened.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked her as I grabbed the letter. Suddenly, I had a dreadful feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I read the letter, which was smudged for whatever reason, and I looked at Ditzy. She looked back at me, her eyes filled with worry.

“P-Please, tell me this is not real,” I can’t accept it. I can’t accept what the letter had revealed to me.

“I’m sorry…” She looked at the ground, avoiding eye contact. “Really, I am…”

“But...but...no...It can’t be..” I let the letter drop on the floor. “I...I…”

Ditzy hugged me, trying to comfort me. I started crying, my tears wetting her fur.

“It...It’s her birthday today. It’s her birthday,” I kept on saying. “I never said greeted her happy birthday. It’s her birthday today…”

Memory Overwrite...

“What are you-?!” I tried to ask but the general forcefully threw me into the ground.

“You know why we’re doing this, traitor!” He yelled at me.

“You’re not making any sense!” I glared at him.

“You want to know what you did again?” He spat at my face. “You killed a great stallion today. One that knows the meaning of what sacrifice is.”

“What?! I still don’t get it!” I tried standing up but he pinned me down.

“You tried to assassinate the Princess!” He stomped my back, hard. “And in the process, you killed one of the the best soldiers there are, Big Macintosh. You are going to pay for the crimes you commited.”

“I didn’t do such thing!” I tried to tell him. “I would never try to kill Her Highness and especially not Big Mac! I demand proof that I did or try to such things.”

“Hehehe, I expected you to say that,” He said menacingly. “I have a lot of eyewitness that claimed to see you fire that bullet that killed Big Macintosh. Want more proof? The bullet that hit him was specially made for a unique gun. That gun belonged to you!”

“W-What?” This can’t be happening. “Wait, that was an accident! There was a fight happening and-”

“Aha! So you do admit to doing the crime,” He interrupted me.

“NO!” I objected. “I never intended to do it! It was an accident, I was about to shoot-”

“Shoot who?” He asked me angrily.

“The zebras! The zebras!” I quickly answered. “We were battling them at Shattered Hoof Ridge. One of them got close to me and I tried shooting him but he somehow managed to knock my-”

“Lies! You willingly shot Big Macintosh and tried to shoot the Princess too!” He kicked me in the ribs.

“I never did it!” I was losing it. I tried to fight him but I was the weaker one. He was a unicorn, which gave him a lot of advantage over me, and he continued to eat me up until I was just a bloody mess.

“I’m done with you,” He levitated his revolver and aimed it at my head. “A life for a life, sounds fair to me.”

This was now how it’s supposed to go. He can’t just make decisions on his own or even sentence me to death. I closed my eyes and waited for my death.

Why did I join the army? Ever since Mom died, I was depressed. I thought I was lost without any of my family. That’s when I saw that poster(or was it flyer? I don’t know) about joining the army. I decided to do it, to become a part of the Equestrian Army. One of my reasons was that I could see Dad again. I never did, they told me he was probably assigned somewhere far away.

About Shattered Hoof Ridge, I never knew why I was assigned there. I remember Big Mac telling me that I would be there as backup, just in case anything bad happened. I’m not the only one he told me to come, I think there was this group, I’m not really sure. So while he was guarding the Princess, I was hiding somewhere (I can’t recall where specifically, all I know I was camouflaged with the environment). I was waiting for something interesting to happen. Then I heard gunshots all around the place. I reacted quickly, shooting any threats I encountered. But they were too many and I was cut-off from poor Big Mac. They managed to incapacitate me and I might be dead if...Actually, I don’t remember how I got out of there or how I ended up here. I don’t even know how I got accused for killing the stallion or trying to kill the Princess.

I know I never did it. I was never there. I think I was framed. They hated me, the team I was placed in, I never knew why. I think it’s because of my relation to Applejack. I heard there were some that despised her. And the memories of the battle? I think those are fake memories. I suspect they did something to me, while I was asleep maybe. Big Mac did die but not by my bullet. No, it belonged to another, I’m not sure who did it though.

Before he shot me, I heard someone enter the room and quickly screamed.

“WAIT! It’s not him! it’s P-”

Bang!

I remembered that loud sound, the sound of death. I was shot, but for another reason. Mercy kill, I think. I’m not so sure, most of my memories while I’m in the army is so vague. Death…Why am I still here?

I walked towards my house, finally glad that the day was nearly over. As usual, apple bucking was hard. I don’t know how AJ could do such task. Hell, I should question Apple Bloom, where did she get her strength?

Anyways, as soon as I stepped into the place I call home, I noticed the room I entered was pitch black. This was confusing, I thought, the lights were only turned off if no one was home and my parents are usually home when it’s evening.

“Quick!” I heard a barely audible whisper. “Do it now!”

I heard a click and suddenly the room was filled with bright light, blinding me. I also heard a bunch of voices greet me as soon as the lights turned on.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” The voices said at the same time.

“You turned on the wrong lights! You blinded the poor kid,” I heard one say.

My eyes eventually got used to the lights and I could now see the ones who were talking a while ago. To my surprise, it was nearly everyone in Ponyville. The Mane 6, my parents, ponies I’m related to, Ditzy, Turner, Carrot Top, Nurse Redheart, Rose Luck, Amethyst, Cheerilee, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Octavia, Vinyl, and many more. A banner which was on the floor (I think it fell when Ditzy tried to open the lights as she accidentally pulled it down, according to Dad) which had the words “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” on it.

“Wow,” I forgot that today was my birthday, how could I have forgotten it? “This...This is amazing!”

Everyone cheered, satisfied that I am genuinely surprised and pleased about what they did. That’s when Vinyl hit the switch and most started enjoying themselves on the party. I was sitting on the couch, taking a sip from my cup of punch (I asked Twilight if she made the punch. Turns out it was Spike. Hopefully, I wouldn’t feel strange after drinking some punch). I then noticed Dad walking towards me.

“Son, I have a gift for you,” He told me with a smile. “Come, follow me.”

He lead me through the crowd and towards the basement. I was really curious about this gift. Was it another sweater? A bunch of books? Maybe if I’m lucky, a screwdriver? I think Dad can feel me trying to keep my excitement contained so he told me to quickly press the button on the middle of the room. I pushed the button, maybe a bit too hard, and waited. After some time, I looked at my dad in confusion. He gave me the same look and shrugged.

“Uhm, nothing’s happening,” I told him.

“Hmm,” He rubbed his chin before pointing behind me. “Wait, what’s that?”

I looked behind me and noticed some sort of gadget that is placed on your foreleg. To most, it will look meaningless or something not worth their time. To me, it was a beauty. I stared at it in awe.

“So, what do you think?” My dad asked me.

“It’s amazing!” I told him. “What does it do?”

“Simple, it’s a device that helps you with building things,” He explained. “You can download blueprints there, do this, do that. I’m sorry but I’m not really good in explaining that. Maybe you should try it, so you’ll know what to do.”

I continued running, away from the darkness. No, I can’t go back to the void. As I tried to escape, I barged into door after door.

“Run, Eclipse, run! Head towards the light and don’t look back.”

For every door I break down, I start to remember little bits of my past. My life with a family and friends, my days before the war, and the sorrow and anger I experienced. Slowly, I managed to piece together a small part of me. But I noticed one thing as I relived these memories, not even once was my name mentioned. Why?

Instead of answers, I had more questions. Questions that I know that can’t be answered by anyone, not even me. Some of my dreams contradicted my memories, confusing me on what's real and what is not. I needed to know who I really am. The only way I’m knowing that is by remembering everything about my past.

I felt myself closer to the exit, the lights slowly getting brighter as I continued to run. The darkness was insistent to catch me, roaring as it tries to engulf me. Finally, I could see an end. It was another door, but this time, it’s transparent. Bracing myself for one last hit on the door, I smashed through it and suddenly feel myself falling. I was scared, unsure of what to do. I looked around me and noticed the light getting dimmer. Then suddenly, I felt a searing pain in my sides. I screamed in pain, trying to find a way to put out the heat. As I fell, I heard one more sentence before the darkness finally caught me.