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Dazzle Robs a Bank

by Eyeswirl the Weirded

Chapter 3: Chapter 3: Things May Get Hairy

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Two waves of SWAT guys later, Jacket had set down the ammo bag so everyone could re-stock. She was the only one that didn't need more ammo at that point on account of barely having fired a shot since they entered the vault. Punch and Fluffy (wisely) never let the cops get within shotgun range, but at least it meant she personally was at little to no risk of running out for now.

During one of the quiet moments, the SWAT hostage spoke. "Bullets aren't pointy." This won Punch's attention. "They're projected with sufficient force to puncture, but you could do the same thing with a perfectly flat object if it were fired fast enough at something, so while live rounds may produce an outcome similar to sharp objects, the truth of the matter is that these similarities are purely-"

Rat-tat-tat!

He was silenced by Star's SMG, which made Fluffy stomp her foot in annoyance. "STAR!!"

"What? He was breaking my concentration and we've shot tons of cops by now."

Groaning, Fluffy maskpalmed. "You could have just kicked him or something." No matter. Three hostages.

There was another pair of shield-bearing Chargers that they couldn't take out as they were, so the three robbers by the vault door ducked completely out of sight and waited for them to come in, Jacket smashing her hammer into the first one's head when he made the mistake of walking in and turning to look at the two other felons. The second came in facing Jacket, but was shot in the back of the head by Fluffy. Something about the situation drew creepy little giggles from Punch, which Jacket earnestly tried to ignore. Eventually, Star called out to them.

"Eight!"

Fluffy glanced over her shoulder to see her dropping another duffel bag of loot onto the pile. "Eight? I told you we only needed six."

Star shrugged, putting her lockpick away. "Yea, but each bag is sorta heavy and I doubt we'll get far carrying two at a time with everybody shooting at us, so we'll have to make two trips. I figured if we'd be coming back for two bags anyway, might as well get everybody carrying full loads. More loot, more pay, right?"

Nodding, Fluffy quickly checked to make sure the coast was clear. "Good thinking, everyone grab a bag and let's move, I'll bring one of the hostages." She hoisted one of the bank tellers to their feet and motioned for Jacket to take point, the four of them moving to the front entrance.

Punch stopped at the vault door, sticking a proximity charge with a red, glowing light in the doorway. "This should keep them coppers from taking our dirtbags!"

No sooner than the second all four of them were out in the hall did the group hear a metallic impact not far away. They turned in the direction of the sound, weapons ready, but the only thing they noticed was a little, black ball rolling in their direction, stopping at Star's feet. The ball immediately sprayed acrid smoke in every direction, which left the four of them coughing and nearly blind.

"Smoker," Fluffy rasped through a cough, "look for green lights!"

Jacket tried to scan the area, shotgun raised. "The guys in g-gimp suits?!"

"Yea," Punch answered, "they'll probably try to-HUAGH!!"

There was the sound of a body hitting the floor, Star and Jacket immediately turning and firing in the direction of the new silohouette in the smoke, which promptly fell and did not get up. When the smoke cleared, Star, Jacket, and Fluffy looked down to see Punch lying by the fallen Smoker, groaning in pain.

"Ooooowwwiieeee..."

Fluffy quickly knelt down to look her over, but to her equal surprise and relief, there weren't even any knife wounds. "Did this one just kick you too?"

"Yea, but he kicked me really hard!"

Maskpalm. "Just get up, we've got a robbery to finish." She looked around for her hostage, finding the teller lying next to the Smoker, equally still. Goddammit, I bet he did that on purpose! Or maybe the Smoker was hoping all four of them would have the presence of mind not to shoot through obscuring smoke with a hostage nearby? Bad planning on his, and Fluffy's parts, perhaps. She bit back snarky comments on carelessness and waved an arm toward the entrance as Punch got up again. "Come on!"

Jacket watched Fluffy curiously. Huh, no mockery there. Did she already get even with Sonata the first time she got taken down? Or is it that she'll wait until we're being shot at a little less for payback?

The four of them had barely set foot out the front door when a loud gunshot was heard, a bullet impacting by Fluffy's feet in the same instant, which made her audibly shriek and fall on her rear, quickly scooting backwards to get out of their range.

Star pulled Punch backward into the bank. "We got Hunters!"

Jacket quickly ducked behind the wall next to the doorway as well. "Hunters?" She peeked through the door to catch sight of two waggling red lasers tracing through the air, originating from a pair of windows on the second floor of a building across the street. The building itself was right next to the alley in which the van was parked. From what Jacket could see, the men holding sniper rifles were both wearing akubras, apparently talking to each other.

"Oi, croikey, looks loike they're fallin' back, gonna 'ave to woit for 'em tah come out again, eh?"

"Aw, piss."

Dammit, thought Jacket, this is getting nuttier by the minute! All I wanted was to rob a bank with a trio of still-kinda-evil divas without much incident, is that so much to ask?!

Her thoughts caught up with her.

Whatever, I know what to do.

"Hey guys, I've got the most armor, I'll pop out and draw their fire, you three pick 'em off when they're distracted, okay?"

The four of them enacted the plan as it was outlined, Jacket getting staggered and almost knocked down by a shot she wasn't fast enough to duck out of the way of, but coming out no worse for wear. Star grumbled about not being able to reliably hit the Hunters at that range with her SMG, costing her two possible kills to Fluffy and Punch, who held the most accurate weapons. Luckily, she was able to make up for this when they charged across the street, being fired on from both sides, Star enthusiastically offering suppressing fire.

Four bags secured in the van, the group turned and charged back, even Jacket firing blindly toward the surrounding police as she and the others ran back into the building. Jogging back to the vault, Sunset found herself smiling under the mask.

Twilight wouldn't approve, but this is getting pretty exciting!

They stopped just outside the vault door to find police untying one of the two remaining hostages, who was already on his feet. Jacket raised her shotgun to clear away one officer, but the newly-freed civilian, before her very eyes, wandered a few steps with just the right timing and direction to bumble in front of the cop and take the shotgun scatter himself. As he fell to the ground, Sunset's world slowed down, tears gathering in her eyes.

I did it. I'm a murderer. I take it back, this isn't exciting. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

When she came to her senses, Fluffy was fuming about all the hostages being dead, but saying through audibly gritted teeth that it probably didn't matter anymore anyway.

"Wait," Sunset nearly begged, "I killed both of them with that shot?!"

"Nah," Star said in a relatively assuring tone, "Punch's bomb went off a little too close to one of 'em when the cops came in. Looks like she took out three more cops with it, though!"

Punch glanced back and forth between Star and Fluffy, something telling Sunset she was alternating between pride and contrition with each turn of her head.

Fluffy appeared indifferent. "Last load, let's move!"

Sunset would keep that tragic accident in her memory, but for now, Jacket's team needed her. She shook off the gloom and grabbed a bag, the group immediately turning and moving as quickly as they could for the entrance.

Standing in the doorway when they got there was a huge, hulking, green blob of a man, his arms and legs as thick as tree trunks, his whole body wrapped in thick, heavy, armor that completely put Jacket's to shame. He even had a helmet! In place of a face mask, however, he wore a thick plate with what looked like tiny holes where the eyes should be. Raising a heavy shotgun in their direction, the man-tank stepped forward, all four robbers opening fire.

He didn't even slow down. There was no blood, no sign of pain, just the occasional sparks flying from the advancing behemoth as he casually fired off a few rounds of his own, Star diving out of the way, Fluffy letting out a high-pitched yelp and ducking behind a counter, Punch running around a corner and out of sight. That left Jacket, who gulped, but didn't back down, leveling her shotgun at the Tank's face-plate and firing every round she had in it.

The plate didn't even seem to be cracking. There was no sign of damage on the Tank whatsoever.

She was sure that if she kept firing, that would change, but there was no time to reload! Luckily, Star and Punch stood side by side behind the Tank, calling out in unison.

"EAT LEAD, FAT BOY!!"

They fired at the same time, rifle and SMG rounds impacting the back of the Tank's well-armored head... and not even making a dent. The Tank turned to face them, heavy shotgun raised as the two frantically started reloading.

Fluffy popped out of her hiding spot, firing more to get the Tank's attention than to damage him. "You want a real criminal?! I'm the brains of this outfit, catching me will make your pitiful career!!"

The Tank turned toward Fluffy, Jacket certain she heard an 'eep!' as the mass of orange ducked back behind the counter. Having only reloaded two shells by this point, Jacket fired both into the back of the Tank's knee, hoping the area was less protected, but it didn't even slow him down. Running out of ideas and knowing she couldn't let the Tank reach their medic, Jacket clutched her sledgehammer and grit her teeth.

Don't worry, Dagi, I'll protect you from the big, bad bullet-sponge.

Screaming with berserker rage, Jacket swung with all her might, raining down blows on the back of the Tank's head, elbows, and shoulders. This at least got some response in the form of pushing him downward by an inch or so through sheer impact, which got his attention enough to make him turn, shotgun raised, and blast Jacket point-blank in the stomach.

The air was knocked out of her and she saw stars, falling back as a cold pain spread from her gut to the rest of her body in slow, regular pulsations. The Tank was standing over her, time seeming to slow as he leveled the shotgun at her head.

Then it sped up again, Punch jumping up onto the Tank's shoulder like an enraged chimp, screaming not unlike Jacket had just a moment before as she toppled the tank over with her weight. Hers, and that of the portable drill, which she hefted in both hands over her head, fired it up, and brought the furiously-whirring drill-bit down on the Tank's face-plate. She stabbed several times until the tip found an eye-hole and plunged it as far as it would go.

The man's dying screams would echo in Sunset's nightmares.

Before she could think about asking Fluttershy to sing her a lullaby or something over the phone when she went to sleep every night for the next week, Jacket was snapped to attention by Fluffy tracing her hands over her stomach, drawing a wince from the bruised robber.

"Jacket! Can you hear me?!"

"Y-yeow..."

"I'll take that as a yes, c'mon, get up!" Jacket couldn't see who Fluffy was snapping her fingers at before dropping her loot bag, throwing Jacket's off too, hooking one of Jacket's arms over her own shoulders, and hefting her up herself, grunting with exertion.

"Sorry," Jacket muttered, "I know, armor's heavy."

"Don't talk," came Fluffy's terse order, "we're almost out!"

Over the cacophony of gunfire, Jacket just focused on keeping her legs moving so as to take as much strain off Fluffy as possible, finding herself in the back of the van next to a pile of loot bags before she knew it. She couldn't see through Fluffy's clown mask as she pulled the doors closed and sat next to her, but she didn't really need to.

Fluffy turned and shouted to the front seats. "You two, take off!"

Star and Punch, driving and riding shotgun respectively, shouted back. "Aye-aye!"

The van started to move. They were getting away with this, mission accomplished. And yet, Sunset felt guilty. "Sorry," she whispered.

Tilting her head a little, Adagio sounded confused. "What? Why are you apologizing?"

"We dropped two bags. I know we got enough to get out, but-"

Adagio chuckled. As she took off her mask, she was sweating, her disheveled (though still fairly straight!) hair hanging in damp tendrils in front of her face, but Sunset could see that she was smirking. "What makes you think I left a single thing behind?" She nodded to the pile of bags accompanying them in the back of the van.

One, two, three... Eight!

Sunset looked back at her in surprise, getting another amused chuckle in reply. "Aria kept the street clean while Sonata was dealing with the Tank, the two of them moved the remaining bags while I tended to you. We didn't lose a thing."

"Oh!" Despite the lingering pain in her stomach, Sunset grinned, taking her mask off. "Great!"

The van trundled along down the road, the sound of police sirens suspiciously absent as Adagio whispered to Sunset.

"And, in case you're wondering?" She smiled, just slightly flushed. "Yes, it would be a little despicable of me to abandon you even if we couldn't have gotten the bags."

Sunset smiled back. "Yes. Yes it would."

Still, she thought, you didn't even poke fun at me a little after the name thing... Was I wrong about you taking revenge to start?

The world faded to white.

Next Chapter: Chapter 4: See You At the Safehouse Estimated time remaining: 18 Minutes
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