Journal of Shining Armor Sparkle
06- Jun- 12 ALR

Equestria is going to crap. There is no other way to put it. The politicians, the reporters, the whoevers of the whatevers can spin it however they want, but Equestria is going on its last limb and there is nothing we can do about it. Even though Brisk Wind has had an insane amount of success in combating the League of Justice, I don't think she is giving me everything. She is hiding something. It can't be the torture since I was there. Or maybe she tried hiding it, but couldn't after I showed up. It makes me wonder how many were tortured in her custody.

Speaking of torture, Trixie Lulamoon finally talked after almost two weeks of nonstop interrogation. I sent Flash Sentry to oversee the guard's interrogating to make sure that they don't try to copy the EIB, who sent some hotshot named Lock over to continue what Brisk Wind started. On top of Trixie's confession, Brisk Wind failed to notify me of the said confession and apparently the guards and EIB agents got into an argument that almost turned into a hoof fight. The good news is that despite the friction between us, our combined reports have given us the League of Justice's headquarters. I want to be there at the battle when we root them out, but in my condition, I'd only be a hindrance, so I am going to ask General Ji to lead the charge in my stead. His Frontier Watch ponies are worth twenty guards easy. No offense to Royal Guard, but they are not ready for this. Equestria has not faced a crisis like this in a thousand years and we need a way out fast and sending an unprepared force against any enemy is asking for a disaster.

When this is all over, I hope that things can go back to the way they were. I hope Twilight can go back to her cheerful self and I hope harmony can return to Equestria so we can do away with the EIB and the CDA and the dozens of other life-sucking agencies we have now. But, with the way things are going, I don't think even the Higher Powers can save us.

P.S.- Mouth writing sucks. How can non-unicorns do this?

BRIEF PSYCH-EVALUATION FOR: Trixie Beatrix Lulamoon (PN: 03231 / CN: 5-05-L)
Filed By: Dr. Note Pad
Date: 06 June, 12 ALR
Report:
Trixie Lulamoon shows symptoms of night terrors, paranoia and possible dementia. I believe she has manifested her fears into an entity named “Sunshine”. She says Sunshine frequently visits her and makes lewd comments and likes to keep her trapped in a corner. She has also been showing intense mood swings, ranging from guarded reservation to aggressive outbursts -many times physical- both in the office and in the commons with me, the guards and other prisoners. I believe that she will need somepony near her at all times for her safety as well as the safety of others should she be released from state custody. Until then, solitary confinement and strong medications are recommended and will be listed below.
Suggested Course(s) of Action:
Transfer to solitary confinement under close supervision by trained medical personnel
2- 25mg of ef̱tychisménos i̱liofáneia with every meal
-NOTE: This will combat her mood swings and ensure a more pleasant nature
-NOTE: Last meal must be biggest. Very important!
-REPORTED SIDE EFFECTS: Increase in energy, excessive happiness, energy crash, munchies
1- 30mg of fengári paidí with last meal
-NOTE: This will help her sleep at night, and if taken with the ef̱tychisménos i̱liofáneia, she will sleep through the night with no trouble after the crash.
-REPORTED SIDE EFFECTS: Drowsiness, minor loss of motor functions
1- 30 mg of afaíresi̱s fántasma with first meal
-NOTE: This will remove hallucinations and lasts up to 24 hours
-REPORTED SIDE EFFECTS: Tingly tongue, leg cramps, twitching eye, floppy ears, itches on rump, uncontrollable tail flicks, temporary color blindness has been reported in 5% of users, ringing in the ears, numb tongue, tooth pain, watery eyes, muscle spams, estrus flash for 1% of mare users, sterilization reported for 2% of stallion users, and addiction to gambling

In a small day care center designed like a Wild West saloon, a group of foals are crowded around a pair of decorative swing doors, waiting in anticipation for the arrival of a mare that has kept appearing and disappearing right before their very eyes. The teacher -an earth pony mare in her thirties with a white coat, a rusty red mane tied into a bun and a piece of chalk as a cutie mark- children can only smile at how easily the kids are amused and how they are oblivious to the azure hooves that are not covered by the door.

“Wheeere’s Trixie?... Here she is!”

A thirteen year old Trixie pushes open the doors, wearing her star studded pointy hat and cape, grinning brightly at the group of little foals. The group giggles, cheers, and awkwardly clap their hooves together, and then Trixie disappears behind the doors after pulling them shut. The foals stop clapping and stare at it, and some sniffle while others wonder out loud where she went.

“Wheeere’s Trixie?”

The foals eyes widen and sparkle with anticipation.

“Here she is!”

Trixie pops out yet again and the foals cheer and clap as loud as their little bodies can. Feeling exhausted from doing such a simple act so many times, Trixie lies down on the ground by a pile of Ursa Minor and Major plushies, which just happen to make excellent pillows. However, the foals crowd around her, begging for more of her amazing disappearing act, so she can't rest as much as she would like. She is not annoyed, though. She likes those little rascals and all the attention they are giving her.

Trixie giggles and snuggles up with an Ursa Major plushie while hugging an Ursa Minor to her chest, keeping her eyes closed but her lips curved to a playful smile. “No, I’m sorry, but I already did that fifty times. I’m tired and must sleep to regain my disappearing powers.”

Then she pretends to snore, and the foals inch closer to her and start poking her all over her body, starting from her face, and moving down to her sides, and eventually her cutie mark. Trixie is using every bit of willpower she has to stop from giggling, especially when they poke at her wand cutie mark, but that task is easier said than done. Every time they poke her cutie mark, there is a surge of ticklish jolts that radiate from the magical marking and takes over her whole leg. In spite of all her best efforts to pretend to be unaffected, her leg still kicks and every time she pulls the leg in, the foals poke it out. Not even tucking her hind leg under her body and covering it with her silver tail can spare Trixie of the onslaught of the amused pokes.

“She’s ticklish,” whispers another foal.

Knowing what's coming, Trixie tries in vain to hold back her smile and giggle.

“TICKLE ATTACK!” yell the foals.

Suddenly, an army of little hooves rub Trixie all over her body, overwhelming her with dozens of tickling sensations in every spot the hooves touch, and she bursts into a trashing, laughing fit that makes her face turn a shade of crimson in seconds. Trixie is soon on her back, flailing her hooves in the air and struggling to breathe through her laughter, and during the tickle assault. The foals continue their relentless tickle attack against Trixie, ignoring her begs to make them stop, not that she could be understood easily since her laughter is turning her words into something less coherent than gibberish.

The eternity that is only a couple of minutes of tickling is brought to an end when the teacher approaches the group and gently shoos the foals away from Trixie. With the kids gone, Trixie is left lying on her back, breathing heavily, sweating, and still giggling sporadically from the overdose of joy that the attention brought.

The teacher helps Trixie up and brushes the loose paper and chewed crayon bits off of her star-studded cape. “Sorry about. These foals hardly had anypony entertain them until you came along. They just can't get enough of you.”

“Oh no, it’s alright, Miss Aural, I love entertaining these little guys,” says Trixie while levitating her hat back on her head.

The teacher nods and heads over to her desk with Trixie following close behind. “I am actually surprised you're still here, to be honest. You will be amazed how many professionals conveniently find more profitable clients to attend after spending a day with those little animals.”

Trixie shrugs and takes a seat in front of the desk, watching the children now wreck a little town made of colorful blocks and little pieces of wood with the Ursa plushies. “Well, their loss.”

Miss Aural pulls out a small bag of bits. “It's not a loss to them. Why spend an hour here for ten bits when you can get four times as much for half the time just by going down the street?”

With that, Miss Aural hands Trixie the bag of bits, which she takes with a grateful smile.

“Well, you won't have to worry about me going anywhere. I will be back tomorrow to entertain these kids again.”

Miss Aural smirks. “Unless you get detention again for cheating.”

Trixie's smile flips to a frown and she points defensively at the teacher. “Hey, I was not cheating. I was using my resources.”

“Well, where I come from, stealing the answers to the wrong test is not only called 'cheating', but 'screwing up', too.”

Trixie's eyes narrow. “The price for the shows just went up to fifty bits, Miss.”

Miss Aural frowns and squints challengingly at the Trixie. “Is that so?”

Trixie nods slowly and steps closer, having to strain her neck a little to look up at the mature mare, who is frowning down at her. This goes on for a few seconds before Trixie's stern gaze cracks into a smile and a snorting laugh. Miss Aural follows suit and the two mare giggle with each other as they go to the exit, with Trixie saying her farewells to the now confused foals. That confusion turns to sadness when they wave goodbye, but changes to happiness when they are assured that Trixie will be back the next day.

“Same time, tomorrow?” asks Ms. Aura as she holds open the door.

“Same time, same pay,” replies Trixie with a smile.

“Okay, good. I'll see you then. Have a safe walk home.”

Miss Aural and Trixie exchange quick hugs, and then the aspiring magician steps outside to the cobblestone streets of Canterlot. She takes a moment to breathe in the fresh air consisting of freshly watered grass and newly bloomed flowers, and feel the warm rays of the sun warm her body.

The inside of Miss Aural's daycare center is at least ten degrees cooler than it is outside, and Trixie loves the warmth of the sun more than the coldness of the inside. After taking in the wonderful feelings for a few seconds, she takes a deep breath and begins trotting down the street, cheerfully greeting the vendors and passerbys along the way. However, someone, or something, catches her eye in an alley.

The pony is familiar, but why he is watching her from the alley instead of walking up to greet her is quite peculiar to her. So, Trixie does the only reasonable thing when a featurless shadow pony is watching someone from an alley. She grins from ear to ear and trots towards it.

“Hey there, Shadow Pony! What are you doing?” says Trixie as she slows to a stop in front of him.

“Watching you enjoy a pleasant memory,” replies the Shadow Stallion.

“Oh...”

“It is nice having ponies that love you, isn't it?”

Trixie nods, but her smile fades to a disgusted frown. “Yeah, but I'd like my father to love me, too. He probably doesn't know that I'm gone since he's always in his office or on the road.”

The Shadow Stallion hums. “I hope one day you can forgive him for his terrible parenting skills.”

“That is probably the biggest understatement of the century, and it will be a cold day in Tartarus if I ever forgive him.”
“Hopefully that cold day comes soon. Your happiness cannot be burdened with grudges.” The featureless pony's horn glows, and before Trixie can do anything besides stepping back, he says: “You need to wake up.”

The glow of his horn blinds Trixie and-

She wakes up on the cot of her new cell, which is a little over half the size of her old cell. Trixie has been his problem for almost three weeks now, and she meets it like how she has been meeting it for the past two weeks. Yawning, curling underneath the thin blanket, and using the worn out pillow as a soft barrier between her head and hoof.

She wants to go back to sleep so she can go back to her happy place, but she is wide awake and is only keeping her eyes closed in the hopes that she can force herself to sleep. There is not much to do in her new cell besides, eat, sleep and stare at the wall. Sometimes the guards will slide a book in with her meals, but Trixie hates reading, especially books that get mushy with all the friendship is magic junk, which is apparently the only kind they have. Trixie would rather stare at a wall than read that kind of garbage.

The only bright side to her situation is that with all the medications they have given her, she no longer sees Sunshine and she feels virtually stress free. With the happy pills, she does not mind being in the cell as long as she gets to pace in circles and think about wonderful rays of sunlight and the colorful bands of rainbows. Another good effect of the collection of pills is that she barely feels the scab ring around her eye, her split lip or the collection of bruises she obtained from her scuffles with the prisoners and guards. She hardly cares that her mane and tail are a mess, too.

As she thinks about the joys of pill induced happiness, the solitary cell door opens and a pair of guards walk in, with one carrying a chain leash and the other carrying a baton. The one holding the leash clips it to Trixie's collar and she makes a whine of disapproval when they gently nudge her up.

"What did Trixie do this time?" whines the mare.

“Nothing. You got a visitor,” says the guard with the leash.

Trixie gasps and her eyes sparkle with amazement and joy as a wide smile spreads across her scarred face. “A visitor for Trixie? Where? Where is this visitor for Trixie? Trixie must know at once!”

She starts pacing in circles again, but with much more vigor and excited giggles and hops, and after the guards manage to get her under control using a combination of colorful vocabulary and threats, they leave the cell. The guards escort Trixie through the passages on the outside of the courtyard, and the prisoners leaning by the fence jump away from Trixie and those that are passing through with their own guard escorts scrunch up against the wall as much as they can. Trixie just smiles and waves, though. She has a visitor! She does not have time to play with the others.

It takes a few minutes for the guards to lead Trixie to a long room separated by a wall with thick glass panels showing what’s on the other side. There, she is brought to the very back where an odd visitor is waiting for her on the other side of the glass. She is an earth pony mare with mint green coat, a wavy pink mane and tail, and she’s wearing a flower necklace and a flower clip in her hair as well as a basic, red frock with a black belt.

Trixie giggles at the amusing sight and pushes a small button on the floor that turns on the intercom for their spot. “You look funny.”

The earth pony smiles and turns on her side of the intercom, replying in a carefree, bubbly voice: “Genetics, gotta love it.”

“Are you Trixie's visitor?”

“Yes, ma'am, I am.”

“Do you want to be Trixie’s friend?”

“Actually, I am already a friend of yours, Trixie.”

Trixie taps her chin, humming. “Hmm, I don’t seem to remember you, though. Did we go to school together at some point? Are you Ribbon Wishes? Oh, no wait, Clarence? You're Clarence, aren't you? You look like a Clarence.”

The earth pony shakes her head, smiling patiently. “No, my name isn't Clarence, silly filly. My name is Minty Sprinkles, and I'm an associate of Princess Celestia.”

“Ohhhhhhhh...” says Trixie, eyes big and her head moving up and down just as slowly as the lone word leaves her lips. “... Minty Sprinkles .... Minty Sprinkles...” Trixie suddenly clops her hoof against the counter and points at the colorful pony in front of her, grinning from ear to ear. “Math class at the Academy! Missus Calculus, right? She had that ruler and that face and nopony liked her because she was a meanie butt-face!”

Minty Sprinkles shakes her head. “Nope. I got-”

“But how can you be Trixie's friend when you haven't shared math class with Trixie?” whines Trixie.

Minty Sprinkles sighs. “I promise I'm your friend Trixie. Anyway, I got-”

An eager smile sprouts on Trixie's muzzle. “Mint?”

Minty Sprinkles cocks her head to the side, brows scrunched and lips pursed. “Mint?”

Trixie nods. “Yeah, mint. You're Minty Sprinkles, you must have mint. Trixie loves mint. Especially minty stuff, like minty gum, minty cookies, minty frosting, minty toothpaste, minty soda-”

“Trixie, how would you like freedom?”

Trixie snorts a laugh. “You’re funny, Minty. Haven’t you heard? This is Singsong Prison! Nopony gets out of Singsong!”

“Not easily, Trixie, that is until now,” says Minty while giving a quick wink. “You see, me being your friend, I had a very long talk with Celestia and now the Princess is like: ‘Gee, maybe Trixie isn’t all that bad’. Now, I'm here and soon you'll be home in a comfy ghetto apartment in Canterlot.”

“Oh, Minty, quit pulling Trixie's tail.”

“I'm not pulling your tail. When you get out, I’ll be acting as your caretaker and we'll be living together in an apartment until we think you are a good pony.”

Trixie's smile disappears and her ears droop as she points at herself with sinking eyes, whimpering: “You don't think Trixie's a good pony?”

Minty sighs and scratches at her mane, contorting her face in response to obvious discomfort. “Well, I think you're a good pony who made some bad choices, but everypony else thinks you're a mean, rotten pony.” She stops messing with her mane and flashes a bright smile at Trixie. “Which is why we're going to show everypony how good you are when you get out of here. Kind of like a super big trust exercise... I think. It might be something else.”

Trixie grins and nods. “I like trust, trust is good. Trust is very good. Just like candy. Do you like candy? I like mint candy.”

“We’ll buy you all the mint candy you want, how’s that sound?”

Trixie squeals joyfully and claps her hooves together. “Oh yay! This is great! I get candy! Lots and lots of candy!”

Minty motions Trixie to push the intercom button and the imprisoned unicorn quickly pushes the said button.

“Do you want Trixie to repeat what she said?”

“Nah, I can read lips,” says Minty Sprinkles with a dismissive wave of her hoof. “But, the process to get you officially out of here will take me a little while, so sit tight and soon you’ll taste the freshness of sort-of freedom. Which is better than the no freedom you’re getting.”

Trixie nods her head quickly, her messy mane bobbing up and down with her motions. Minty smiles and tells her hang tight and then she leaves in a flash. Trixie presses her face against the glass to try to find her, but all she sees is wood and a boring brick wall. She does not stare long, though, because the guards take Trixie back to her solitary cell where she waits patiently for her freedom bringing mare to come and get her and give her candy.

And freedom, too.

Hours later, Trixie is still sitting in her solitary confinement cell, stomach rumbling and face twitsted to an aggravated scowl aimed at the dreaded steel door holding her in this prison in a prison. The drugs have worn off, leaving Trixie feeling empty and hateful. She has lost track at how long she has been in this prison, and being locked inside a box with no way to tell time has not done her any favors. Still, there is no Sunshine, which is nice for her, but she is hungry and miserable and wants those happy pills.

No, she needs those happy pills.

Without them, she is left with only the truth. The cold, hard truth that life sucks then you die. It is a truth she does not want to deal with and at least with the pills that come with her lunch -which should be coming very soon- she does not have to deal with this reality. She can live in another one that is full of joy and love and everything that this world is not. Besides, there is also Minty Sprinkles.

Trixie has been sifting through her memories for any clues about the strange pony ever since they parted ways, and she is left with nothing but a desire for ice cream with mint sprinkles. It actually makes her mouth water and a part of her hopes that they will stop by an ice cream parlor and get some mint ice cream with the cool sprinkles, but she also does not want to get her hopes up.

She does not trust Minty Sprinkles.

Maybe her drug-persona does, but not her sober, absolutely miserable state that needs the drugs. Why would a random pony come out saying she was a friend? Why would Celestia pardon her of her crimes even though she leveled a construction sight, killed Pinkie Pie and assaulted Twilight? Did Celestia finally realize how much Twilight sucks and is willing to pardon her for beating the snot out of her prized pupil? Is Minty Sprinkles actually Twilight Sparkle in disguise and is she going to stab her in the back and leave her to choke on her own blood somewhere in an alley where no one will find her?

So many possibilities, so many things not right with this sudden release.

Trixie shifts her position again and continues to stare at the door, waiting for the grungy steel barrier to open and for the guard to drag her along that leash of theirs like she is a dog. Minutes later of staring and tummy rumbles later, Trixie looks at the floor and realizes how dirty it is. The worn concrete is bleeding rust in spots and the cracks in the wall and the sounds of water rushing through the pipes add to the dread she’s feeling. And it does not help that the weak light bulb is constantly flickering on and off.

She really needs those pills. They will take her out of this Hell in no time.

Right as that thought ends, the door opens and Trixie's ears perk as she looks up, hoping for a lunch and some more pills. What she gets is a pair of guards with the leash and no lunch. Her face falls and her stomach groans in disappointment. She stays still and quiet like a petrified animal as the chain is clipped to her collar, and she gets up with a low grumble and a stomach rumble as she is led out to where more guards are waiting.

Trixie’s mind goes blank as they lead her to a bathroom, where they give her a quick wash that makes her sparkle. Well, almost sparkle. She would be if it was not for the large amount of bruises and scratches she has sustained from her stay, but at least her mane and tail got their natural curl and shine back.

After the guards wash her up, they remove her collar, the cuff on her horn with plenty of unicorn guards watching to make sure she does not do anything stupid and her prison garb. When that is taken care of, they give her a month’s supply of her prescription drugs that were issued to her by Doctor Note Pad, and then they take her to Minty, who is waiting for them on the other side of the prison's main gate. Minty is alone and beaming at Trixie with obnoxious, frantic waving and shouting of greetings, which makes Trixie feel all the more uncomfortable and suspicious. After all, how can Celestia employ a loon?

The guards lead Trixie up to Minty, who's smile disappears when she sees Trixie's grumpy look, and she stares at the guards curiously as she points at the newly released pony.

“Did I get the right Trixie? Because the one I talked to was a happy-go-lucky filly,” says Minty.

“She's the right one,” says one of the guards.

Trixie grunts.

Minty looks at Trixie, demeanor sulked slightly. “Aren't you happy to be sort-of free?”

Trixie frowns at Minty. “The circumstances are suspicious to me.”

Minty's smile returns. “Yeah, the circumstances are odd, but at least you’re getting your kinda freedom right?”

Trixie is silent and Minty moves next to her and playfully nudges her side with her elbow as the guards leave, and said nudged pony scowls and inches away from the crayon-baby pony.

“Right?” says Minty.

“Yeah, I guess so,” grumbles Trixie.

“Good! Joe is waiting for us just around the corner in the parking lot.”

Minty grabs Trixie and pulls her in for a hug, causing her eyes to bulge and her muscles to tighten and body to tremble as her heart rate increases tenfold.

“Next stop, Canterlot!” proclaims the crazy mare, completely oblivious to her body vibrating from Trixie's shakes.

Trixie's stomach roars and grumbles and rumbles, and Trixie freezes and scrunches her mouth and averts her eyes to the sky as Minty looks at Trixie's stomach, smile gone and eyes bugged out. That lasts only a second before Minty points to the sky, grinning again.

“Never mind! Next stop, Donut Joe's!”

Trixie sighs and lowers her head.

She has a feeling she is in for a long day.

Author's Notes:

Added 10 May 2015