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We Call It Erotica

by eLLen

Chapter 1: Introduction


Introduction

Rarity hummed a delightful tune to herself as she poured herself a cup of tea. Carefully laden to her satisfaction with the exact sugar-to-water ratio, the woman grasped it in her hand.

Taking a sip and then smiling as she found it to her liking, Rarity walked out of the kitchen and into the living space of her boutique. Alternating between her sipping and the tune caught in her head, she couldn’t help but feel a pang of boredom as she glanced toward the empty space between her and the front door. Slow day for business , she thought. Rarity didn’t know quite why, other than such a day would rear its head every now and then, but she could only hope it wouldn’t become a regular occurrence. As much as the fashionista loved her breaks, she still had bills to pay.

Much to her boredom, Rarity didn’t even have Sweetie around to keep her entertained. Although she was staying with her for a few weeks of summer vacation, too often she would be picked up by her two friends to prance about the town and hopefully not cause a scene. …I’d hate to see her in her teens, Rarity half-joked to herself.

Her attention perked up as a familiar knock flew through the air. Someone’s at the door!

With a flick of her purple, lavishly styled hair over her shoulder, she put on her mask of professional cheer as she made her way toward the doorway and grasped the doorknob. After giving herself a last glance over, she pulled it open.

“Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where every garment is chic, unique, and magnifique!” the designer sang. “May I take… Oh, Applejack! What a surprise to see you here.”

Her friend stood in the doorway, satchel hanging off her shoulder, and silent for a few moments. She seemed content to stare at her friend behind a blank expression before shaking herself into focus. “Uh, hey, Rares.”

Rarity raised an eyebrow, but she decided not to question it. Yet. “Hello to you too, dear. Come in, come in!” She ushered in Applejack, guiding her to a seat on the couch. “Would you like some tea?”

“No thanks.”

“Are you sure? I know you don’t drink it often, but this cup turned out quite nice.”

“I’m fine, thanks.”

“Suit yourself.”

As she watched Applejack fidget in her seat, it became more and more apparent that she was keeping something to herself. Wonder what that could be, Rarity thought, a hint of a playful smirk on her lips. “What brings you over, Applejack? I thought you would be working your market stand today.”

She nodded after a moment. “I was. But Big Mac’s running it right now. I’m taking a break.”

“And you decided to spend that break by visiting me?” Rarity giggled. “How sweet of you.”

Applejack tried and failed to share in the humor, ending up sounding like something had caught in her throat. “Uh, eeyup. Heheh…”

Rarity could’ve burst into a fit of full-fledged laughter right then. Why, I can’t remember the last time she’s been this flustered. “So…” she said, forcing her voice calm, “how is Apple Bloom? I always hear from Sweetie that they’re up to no good. Nothing new there, I suppose.”

“She’s fine, yeah. Soon she’ll be old enough to help with work on the farm.”

“Is that so?”

“Eeyup.”

Rarity cocked her head. “Applejack?”

“Hmm?”

“What’s on your mind?”

Applejack recoiled back as if jolted by the words. “On my mind? Nothing, nothing at all.” Her face scrunched up as she glanced toward the corners of her eyes. The true face of honesty.

“Really?” Rarity continued. “I could’ve sworn by the way you were acting that something was eating at you.”

“Nope.”

She waved her hand in a dismissive fashion. “No? Well, pardon me for—”

“What the hay did you do?!”

Rarity leaned away at the sudden outburst, taken by surprise. She blinked. Well… there it is. Regaining her composure with a breath, she set her sights on the anxious Applejack. “Whatever do you mean, dear?”

“You-you…” She shook her head as she heaved a sigh. “Just what did you do?”

“Applejack, if I know what you’re going on about, I might be able to answer you.”

A defeated look overtook the farmer’s features, but she simply nodded. “Uh-huh. Here, I’ll just show you.”

Rarity watched as Applejack reached into her bag, whipped out a magazine, and slid it across the table toward her. It landed cover-down, only showing off the usual assortment of advertisements on the back page. “What’s this?” she asked.

“Take a look for yourself.”

Rarity narrowed her eyes but decided to go along with it. As she flipped the magazine over, she only needed a second to recognize the logo. Repressing the urge to roll her eyes, she thought, Oh, it’s one of those “beauty” magazines. Which one is this? The cosmoponytan? As usual, they had a model on the cover dressed in about square foot’s worth of fabric and posed in a way that just so barely kept her decent. At least they chose a girl that looks half-decent this time. I do like her purple, lavishly styled— She froze. …Hair…

Her eyes bolted up to meet Applejack’s, only to find a confused, almost helpless face peering back. She returned to the magazine, eyes becoming glued to the cover girl as if watching a train wreck. “Applejack…?”

“Yeah…?”

“What is this?”

“Latest edition. Came out today.”

Rarity let out a sound akin to both a squeak and a gasp. Her hand twitched a few times as if unsure of what it should be doing, but it managed to grip the magazine’s side, crumpling up the paper, before swiping it away and onto the floor. With a shaky breath, she glanced back up to her friend. “You… didn’t answer my question.”

“Huh? What do you—”

“What. Is this?”

Applejack cringed. “I dunno. I saw it at the magazine stand. Hay, I came here ‘cause I wanted to know what it is.”

“I don’t… Please tell me this is a joke. Please tell me Rainbow’s going to pop out and yell ‘gotcha!’”

The farmer shook her head. “Okay, Rares? I know you’re mighty confused, but I’d bet I’m even more so. Would you mind telling me what’s going on?”

With a reluctant nod, Rarity agreed. “That… photo… isn’t supposed to be there. It shouldn’t be in any magazine at all. It shouldn’t even…” She trailed off, drawing out a sigh.

“How about you start at the beginning?”

“I will,” she replied in an instant. “I will… But, Applejack, just think of what’s going on right now. Out there, people must be buying the magazine in numbers!”

“Uh-huh... Well, it could be worse, right?” she said, trying to put an upbeat note into her voice.

Rarity deadpanned. “Yes, yes it could. And it is. That photo—” She pointed to the ground. “—is far from the worst of them.”

Applejack’s brow furrowed. “What do you…mean?” She shook her head. “You know what? Just tell me what’s going on. Everything. Then once we get an idea of what’s happening, we’ll go from there, alright?”

“I already know what’s happening,” she retorted. “But what the hay? I’ll tell you... I’ll tell you what I know.”

“Right. Start at the beginning…

“Tell me just how you ended up on the cover of Equestria’s ‘most notorious’ magazine.”

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