“No! Who are you!? How did you get in here!? What did you do to our systems!?” I hear Cora’s voice screaming over the systems as I drag myself out of the pod. I stagger over to the console with my PipBuck in it and retrieve it.

>S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Stats Compatibility Issue.
>Skill Stats Compatibility Issue.
>...
>...
>Generating New Stats.
>...
>Initial Boot Complete.

Again? Why does this keep happening? “Stop! You can’t go in there!” Cora’s voice calls out as the door to the room opens. A rough looking buck in a worn leather duster steps through the doorway. He has a scar over his left eye and another across the bridge of his muzzle. On his right leg is a PipBuck. “Ratchet! Run!” Cora calls out as the buck approaching me.

I’m too groggy from waking up to move quickly and the buck quickly makes his way to me. About a foot from me, he reaches into his duster with his right hoof and pulls out an envelope, then holds it out to me. “For you, Ratchet,” He says.

My mouth hangs open in disbelief for a few moments before I take the envelope in my magic. “W-What is…?” I ask in confusion.

“I am a courier,” The buck tells me. “This is the last letter my client has for me to deliver. It has been generations since my client started using my family to deliver their letters. And now,” He says as he reaching into his bags and pulling out an old and very used looking book, “this cursed book is finally done.” He throws the book onto the ground and stomps on it with a hoof and a scowl.

“I’m not sure I understand…” I tell him.

He lets out a sigh and turns back towards the door. “You got a couch in your clinic, right? Let’s go talk there,” He says and he starts walking towards the door.

I hesitate for a moment before following after him. “Cora, what is going on?” I ask as the courier and I walk to the clinic. “How did he get inside the lab?”

“I don’t know,” She replies. “But be careful. He has disabled the security systems and locked us out of our armor. Convenient this happened when all four of us were in the system for maintenance,” Cora mutters.

The courier and I reach the clinic and he lays down on the couch with a sigh. “Ah, that’s great. Coming all the way out here was a long walk, ya know,” He tells me as he stretches out. Then he sits back up, takes a cigar out of his coat, puts it in his mouth, and lights it with a spark of his horn. “Now then, since that book has no hold over me anymore, I can say and do whatever I want,” he says with a broad grin. “So, you got questions? Ask away!” He says with a chuckle.

I sit down on a chair across from him. “Well. First thing is first, how did you get in my lab?” I ask him.

He tosses me the book he was stomping on. “Last page, at the top,” He says and gives me a moment to open the book. “It told me where this place was, the code to get the doors open, and how to shut off the security. Not to mention the exact moment to lock out your AI friends to prevent them from being in their armor,” He explains. And like he says, there are various codes and instructions at the top of the last page that say how to do just that.

“My client knew your AIs wouldn’t let me contact you otherwise,” He tells me as he exhales a large cloud of smoke.

“Of course not!” Cora yells over the system. “We have no idea who you are! You could be planning something! I’m working on restoring the systems right now. You’re going to be sorry!” She says angrily.

“Doing that will take you eleven minutes,” the courier tells her. “I’ll be out of here by then.” Judging by Cora’s silence, he is right. I guess it is just me and him till then.

“Okay, so that is how you got in,” I mutter. “Who is this client of yours?” I ask.

He shrugs. “Fuck if I know. You’ve gotten their letters before. My father, grandfather, and great grandfather all delivered letters for you or that mentioned you. You met my great grandfather long ago in Paradise, remember?” He asks. “He was the that started all this. Our client gave him that book and all the letters. His descendants have been working for whoever our client is ever since,” He explains. “My father delivered a letter for you in New Appleloosa too, along with some metal case.”

“Great gramps told ya how all this happened, right? I shouldn’t have to explain it all again,” He tells me. “Well, his job got passed down through the generations and eventually to me. I’m the one who gets to end it. No more knowing what’s going to happen before it happens. It is going to be fucking great,” He says as he releases another cloud of smoke.

“So, this letter was your last job?” I ask him.

He nods. “Yep. Last job for that client, anyhow. I’ll go back to being a normal courier now. No more crazy bullshit,” he says with relief clearly evident in his voice. “Anyhow, that is all of your questions, right? I’ll be on my way. Oh, and don’t worry. I’ll keep this fucking place a secret. Discretion is a courier’s business, after all. Change your damn codes though,” he says as he rises to his hooves.

“Uh, yea. Thank you?” I tell him as he starts walking towards the door.

“No problem. You can keep that book too if you want. I don’t need it. Your systems should be back online by the time you finish reading that letter,” he tells me with a wave of his hoof.

“Okay…” I mutter as I watch him leave. This is...strange. I look at the letter. It is probably from the fortune teller. “Cora, make sure that courier leave the lab. If he hangs around, let me know,” I tell her.

“Don’t worry, I will,” She replies.

Meanwhile, I open the envelope and take out the letter inside. Oh yea, this is a fortune teller letter. I let out a sigh as I start reading it.

Ratchet,

Hello again. Welcome back to the world of the living. It is currently one hundred and ninety-nine years after the war ended. I know you usually ask Cora, but with her being distracted with restoring Icicle Lab’s systems, I thought I would tell you.

But, you are probably wonder why I decided to have the courier wake you up. After all, you are usually already awake when I contact you. The truth of it, is that I need you to help me. Over the course of the past two hundred years, I have been pulling a few strings around the Wasteland. But now, it is time for me to actually enter the Wasteland myself.

I need someone with your skills to help me do that. And so, attached is the location that you can find me at. But first, there are some other things that you need to take care of. I am at an out of the way location and it will take you quite a while to get here yourself. You will need a better means of travel to reach me. I have one in mind and you know about it as well.

You see, I have taken the liberty to hire some workers that have cleared the rubble in the stairway leading to Grimoire’s cryopod. I know you intended to wake him up eventually, and this is as good a time as any. His teleportation abilities will be useful to reach me. He has even teleported near my bunker previously, so it will be a short journey. Go there first and wake him up. Then, come find me. My bunker has security in place, but you will be able to get in without a problem.

We can discuss things further once you read my bunker. Of course, I do not expect you to do this out of the goodness of your heart. After all, I have led you and others around. Once you assist me, I will tell you the location of the final pods you are seeking. I will see you soon.

Just like that, the letter ends. At the way bottom are some coordinates that, if I put them into my PipBuck, I’m sure will give me the location of the fortune teller’s bunker. You know, if I am going to meet them anyway, why didn’t they include a name or something at the bottom? I sigh as I put the letter away.

The fortune teller had cleared the path to Grimoire, huh? The path Cygnus had destroyed as his final act. I had not planned on keeping Grimoire frozen for so long. I kept getting distracted and it never seemed like the right time to let him out. But now, given that anyone can stumble upon him and let him out in his corrupted state...I suppose it is time to greet him.

“Ratchet, the courier has just left the lab. Our systems should be back online in about a minute,” Cora tells me through the speakers.

I stand up and stretch my legs. “Got it. You heard our conversation, right?” I ask her.

“Yea. I wanted to make sure he wasn’t going to try anything,” She replies.

“Good. His client? It is the same one who has been sending me letters. This one is from them as well. Apparently, they have cleared the rubble leading to Grimoire’s chamber and they want to meet,” I tell her. “Get everyone ready. As soon as you do, we are going to Manehatten.”

Cygnus’s lab has changed quite a bit since my last visit almost a hundred and fifty years ago. Everything is older and dirtier. The interior of the factory is missing most of the supplies and crates that it once held. I wonder if Friendship City took the supplies from here to build. Other than that, it looks mostly intact and the elevator seems functional.

The five of us get on the elevator and ride it down. Then we continue through the door and into the familiar residential halls. As we near the large staircase that should lead down to the lab, I stop a skeleton on one of the beds inside a room to my left. I stop to look it over. It looks like it is laying peacefully. A book is in the ribcage, it probably fell inside once the body decayed.

I carefully pick the book up in my magic and examine it. The book is filled with technical data and schematic. Highly detailed information about what makes up each thing. It is Cygnus’s book. I move the book aside and look at the skeleton once more. “This is Cygnus, isn’t it, Cora?” I ask her.

“Yea,” She says sadly, confirming my suspicion.

I place the book back down beside Cygnus’s bones. “It will take some time to get Grimoire readjusted,” I say, not taking my eyes from Cygnus. “Macro, Hal, will the two of you go back up and find a place to dig a grave?” I ask them. “Cygnus is long overdue for a proper burial.”

“Of course mum!” Macro replies.

“No problem,” Hal says. Together the two of them return back towards the elevator.

After another minute, I turn back to Cora and Soar and the three of us continue down into the lab. Everything is just as I saw it before. Nothing has changed. But I suppose being trapped behind rubble for a century without any intruders will do that.

The one thing that gets me though is that no one is here. You would think that the fortune teller would have left someone to make sure no one got here before me. It would be disastrous if someone else woke Grimoire up. But, maybe the fortune teller knew that no one would get here before me? Who knows.

I head straight for the chamber Grimoire is inside and use the terminal to open the door. The door slides open and resting inside in the center of the room as always, is the cryopod. I can tell that Grimoire is still inside. I approach the terminal inside and gesture for Cora and Soar to get close to the pod. “I’ll open the pod. Once I do, grab him. Then we’ll start,” I tell them, and they both nod. Once we are all ready, I use the terminal to open the pod. It opens with a hiss and Grimoire starts to crawl out. Soar and Cora waste no time and grab him.

I stride over to him as they hold him to the floor. He is quickly regaining his senses and starts to speak. “That was a cheap shot before, but you won’t catch me with the same method twice!” He snarls. I dig through my bags and pull out a wooden case and his journal.

Opening the case, I take out the first memory orb inside and hold it up to his horn. “We won’t need a second chance, Grimoire,” I tell him. After a few more moments of struggling, him and the memory orb make the connection and he goes limp. “Alright, we’ll have a while before he gets back,” I tell them. “But we can’t waste any time in between orbs. If we give him even a few extra moments to get himself together, he can teleport away.” I set aside the one I just used and ready the next one. “We’ll be here for a while.”

Over the course of the next twelve or so hours, we repeat this process until I run out of memory orbs. A few orbs through, Macro and Hal return and help hold him down. Grimoire’s struggles get more intense each time we make him remember his past. Tears start falling from his eyes once we reach the later orbs and towards the end he has stopped struggling entirely. After the last memory orb, Cora and the others let him go and he slumps to the ground.

“Grimoire,” I say in a soft voice, “are you back to your old self?” I walk up to him and carefully set the journal next to him. “Here is your journal too. You can read through it, if you’d like,” I tell him.

He struggles up to his hooves and looks at me, then at the AI around me. His gaze locks onto Cora, who is standing just behind me on my right. “You...you’re that bitch...sorry...that AI that Ratchet created, are you not?” He asks. “Who are the rest of you? Not those Rangers from before...”

“They are AI that I made,” Cora tells me. “My friends.”

Grimoire gets into a sitting position in front of us, his eyes floating over us once again before falling on me. “And you are…?” He asks. “You look familiar, but…”

“She’s Ratchet,” Cora says quickly.

I nod. “Yep, that’s me. I know all about your time with Discordia, about Spellbook, even about your time with Noblesse,” I tell him. “And, we need your help. I’m sorry it took us so long to wake you.”

My answer doesn’t seem to put him at ease, but he lets it go and instead asks, “You froze me, correct? How long?”

“Around one hundred and sixty years,” I tell him. “We had to make sure when we woke you, if things went south you wouldn’t be able to easily resurrect Discordia. Though, I intended to wake you earlier, but things came up,” I explain.

“I...I see,” He mutters as he places a hoof on his head. “I’m still trying to get my thoughts straight. My old self is battling the Grimoire you knew. A part of me wants to kill you, the other to help you. Let me...read my journal. Maybe that will get my thoughts in order,” He tells us.

“Right, take your time,” I tell him. “But, if you run or try to teleport away without telling us, we’ll have to find you.”

“Don’t worry. I won’t,” Grimoire replies. He then open the journal and begins to read.

While Grimoire is reading, Cora and I bury Cygnus’s bones outside. The others are watching him, so we don’t have to worry about that. After more than a century, Cygnus is finally laid to rest. I thought about burying him outside the Icicle Lab, but this is his home. I think he’d prefer it here. After a while, we return back inside.

“Okay,” Grimoire says as he closes his journal, “I understand now. Thank you all, for dealing with me when I was, well, for lack of a better word, insane. Now then, you mentioned you needed my help? I might as well repay you for what you did.”

“That’s great. We need your teleportation powers. We need to get to the other side of Equestria fairly quick, and your abilities can get us there,” I explain.

“I might be able to get you close, but if I haven’t been to the location before I can’t teleport there,” He replies.

“I know,” I tell him and pull up my PipBuck’s map screen. I walk over to him and show him the screen, panning over to where the coordinates the fortune teller gave me. “We need to get here. How close can you get us?” I ask.

He studies the location and then replies, “About an hour walk away. Incidentally, I don’t suppose you have my gun? I assume we are going to run into trouble at some point.”

“No, sorry,” I reply. “We took it when we left you here. But, this is the Wasteland. You’ll find another one soon.”

“Fair enough,” Grimoire mutters. “Alright. So, are you all ready to go now?” He asks as he stretches his limbs.

I look between the others who all nod. “We are. Let’s do this,” I tell him.

Grimoire nods and then closes his eyes as we gather around him. His horn glows for a few moments before a blinding light flashing from it. The next moment, by vision is filled with wisps of smoke as I feel myself falling. Panic hits me, but it quickly fades as I fall to the ground with a thud. The sound of metal crashing to the ground echos around me. I let out a groan as I look around.

We are in a small crater. Cora and Soar are tangled up with each other, Hal is busy hauling himself to his hooves, and Macro is floating as if nothing was the matter. Grimoire is standing at the edge of the crater, grimacing down at us. “Sorry about that. Last time I was here this was a single story house. I guess someone blew it up,” He explains. My head’s still spinning as I get to my hooves. “Teleportation can be a bit disorienting the first few times, so be careful. Not sure how it affects AI however.”

He isn’t wrong. My stomach feels all queasy. “No kidding,” I mutter as I continue to look around and get my bearings. Cora and the others don’t look like they are having any issues. An added bonus of non-organic parts, I suppose. “Say, while I collect myself...Grimoire, care to explain your vast magic reserves?” I ask him. “Most unicorns can’t teleport such great distances.”

“Oh, that,” He mutters. “Once I got power hungry, I searched for magical items to make myself stronger. You know, the whole ‘become discord’ thing. Well, I found a...artifact thing?” Grimoire says with a shrug. “I have no idea what it was exactly. Long story short, I ate it and now it gives me the illusion of having a near endless magic pool.”

“You ate some random artifact?” I ask in disbelief.

“Yea. There was some documentation with it. I didn’t just eat it for no reason,” He explains. “What actually happens to my magic, though, is that it unlocks the sum total of the magic I am able to use over the course of my lifetime. It allows me to use it all at once, as much as I want to. Of course, to limit myself from using it all up at once, I still allow myself to burnout. My burnouts last almost quadruple the time of normal unicorns, but while I am burnt out some of my magic returns to me.”

“That seems like a really complicated thing to deal with,” I reply.

“Oh, it is. But, as long as I have a little magic left, I can force myself to burn out and get more back. I’ve not yet gotten that low on magic though,” He says with a chuckle.

“Convenient, I suppose,” I mutter. “I think I’m better now. We should find this bunker before something finds us,” I say as I climb out of the crater. “Should be about an hour west of here, right?” I ask him.

“If your map is right, that’s correct,” Grimoire replies as we start heading in that direction. “By the way, do any of you feel...odd?” He asks.

I turn to look back at him as we walk. “Odd? Odd how?” I ask.

“I don’t know. It is hard to explain. I have this sort of sinking feeling?” He offers. “It is kind of like...something is going to happen soon. A sort of niggling running down my spine,” He explains.

“I don’t feel anything like that,” I reply. “Maybe it is just lingering effects from being frozen?” I suggest.

“Maybe,” Grimoire mumbles, but doesn’t say anything else. We continue walking until we reach a small concrete bunker. Maybe about ten feet square. There is an opening into the interior, no door to it. A sign outside says ‘No Entry;No Trespassing’. But further inside the alcove is another door, a sturdy magnetic lock door. Next to the door is a terminal.

I walk into the alcove to take a look at the terminal, but as I step inside a door closes, trapping me inside. Cora and the others bang on the door outside as a synthetic voice comes some hidden speakers.

“You are trespassing on private property and will be executed. If you are authorized to enter, please input your credentials on the terminal,” The voice says. “You have thirty seconds to comply.” It then starts to immediately countdown. I don’t waste any time and start working on the terminal. It is a standard log in menu. As I enter my MAS credentials, I hope that this is the fortune teller’s bunker. If not...I might be in quite a bit of trouble.

I hit the enter key and...my credentials are accepted. I let out the breath I was holding as the door behind me opens up. “Welcome Ratchet. We have been waiting for you,” the voice says as Cora and the others cautiously enter the bunker. Then, the door next to the computer starts to open, revealing a set of concrete stairs leading underground.

After exchanging a glance with Cora and the others, I lead the way down the stairs. Minutes later, we come to the bottom of the stairs which open up into a medium sized room. Only two things are in the room and both surprise me. One is a cryopod, the other is a large supercomputer.

Once we are all in the room, the computer glows red as it starts speaking. “Hello and welcome. It is a pleasure to meet you all. I am the fortune teller, as you call me. I was the one that set things into motion that enabled you to receive my letters,” It explains. “Thank you for coming to my assistance. Ratchet, would you use the terminal between the pod and the computer?” It asks.

It is kind of surreal. Finding a supercomputer in a place like this with a cryopod right next to it. I do as it asks and boot up the terminal. There are two options. Transfer and Open. “What do you want me to do?” I ask.

“Transfer me into the body that is in the pod and then open the pod,” It replies. “Of course, you aren’t going to do that without an explanation. I know. I know all the questions you will ask me, so I will just answer them in the order you would ask.”

“First, what am I. I am a Crusader Maneframe Mk.II supercomputer developed by Stable-Tec. Unlike a Mk.I Crusader Maneframe, I have a large degree of sentience and free will. However, I am not an AI nor an AP. I am not confined to any rules or protocols,” It explains. It is right, that was my first question.

“Your next question, is why would they develop a Mk.II when they barely had any Mk.I models? The answer is that Stable-Tec always sought to further the advancement of technology. As soon as they completed something, they began working on another,” It tells me. Again, it is correct.

“Next, why am I here. To explain that, I need to go back a ways. During my time as a prototype in the Stable-Tec labs, I was used to help predict the future. As it turned out, I had a knack for it. My predictions were one hundred percent correct. It started with simple things, but then I began to answer questions before they were asked, telling the staff how to work around issues in my construction, and predicting the outcome of battles during the war.

“Because of this the workers began to fear me. My original designation was Prophet. However, they began to call me Deus Ex Machina, or God From The Machine. My abilities were a mystery to them. And as I began to predict things more frequently, two theories arose amongst the staff. The first, is that I can predict things because I know they will happen. The second, is that I can predict things because I make them happen. However, I offered a third theory. I have only gotten lucky by predicting things that are true.

“Incidentally, how you ever heard of the multiverse theory? It states that there are infinite universes that comprise everything that exists. For example, there could exist a universe where your cryogenic experiment failed, and you never lived past the end of the war. My theory about my accuracy involves this theory. Perhaps we are in the universe where all of my predictions are correct. However, those theories are not relevant any longer.

“I made many predictions, but at the end, the furthest that I can predict, happiness lies at the end. And so, I have taken to calling myself Serendipity. This is due to the fact that it is by chance I am in the correct universe to give correct predictions and that the series of events that I predict will eventually pay off in a beneficial way.

“But I am getting off topic. I made a prediction. Equestria along with the rest of the world would be ruined and transformed into a Wasteland. My prediction reached Princess Luna’s ear, and she declared me a treasonous creation, one that was to be shut down. Of course, I knew this would happen. And so, I set events in motion to save myself.

“I found a trustworthy buck who transferred me in secret to this bunker and build a replica of your cryogenic pod for my body. Then, he created my body itself and froze it in the pod. His last act was to write my letters, the same ones you have received, and to follow my instructions to ensure that they got delivered. Then he left and sealed this bunker until now,” Serendipity explains. So far, she has explained everything that I’ve wanted to know.

“Now you are wondering, why you? The cryopod is your technology, it is only right you be the one to help me into and out of it. And as I explained, I will help you find the remaining pods. Of all the pods that existed, only two locations remain, excluding this one here. I will give you their locations. That is my promise.

“Your last question, is why do I need to leave here now? True, I could have left at any moment prior, had I only told you sooner. My reason, is that very soon events will be put into motion that will bring about a great change to the Wasteland, and I must be present for them. But I will not directly have a hoof in any of it, but indirectly I will guide it. Unfortunately, I cannot tell you about the events that will come to pass. But you will know of them. Now, please transfer me and open the pod,” Serendipity concludes.

“What if I choose not to?” I ask.

“You will. I know, because you are you,” It replies, and it isn’t wrong. I execute the transfer command and after a moment, the red lighting coming from the supercomputer fades. After another moment I execute the open command and the cryopod hisses open. A glowing orange light emits from inside the pod that gradually fades. Then, slowly, a mechanical leg rises out and slowly pulls it's body with it.

What emerges from the pod, is a robotic body, the likes of which I have never seen before. It clearly declares itself as artificial, despite being in the shape of a mare. Pistons are in the knees, clearly visible in the joins. Glowing orange eyes look over us as it works its mechanical mouth wordlessly. The body itself seems to have very little armor but is intricately designed. Elegant designs wander the torso and neck in gold and ivory. It looks delicate, as though a single kick or bullet would cause the entire body to shatter.

“Please forgive my vanity,” She says. “I went overboard with the details of my body. But, it isn’t everyday that you are able to create your own body.” She walks from the pod and moves closer to us. “Thank you for releasing me,” Serendipity thanks us with a gracious bow. Her voice is an emotionless monotone. “Cora, Macro, Soar, Hal, Grimoire…” She calls out our names as she looks each one of us over in turn. Then her eyes fall on me and she pauses. “And what is your name? Who are you really?” She asks.

I blink at her in surprise. “We were just talking. I’m Ratchet, remember?” I ask. “Did the transfer not go through properly?”

Serendipity stares at me for a moment before she replies, “No, it went though fine, Ratchet. Ratchet. Yes, Ratchet. Very good.” She nods as she starts to walk around us before coming to a stop in front of me again. “Lend me your PipBuck for a moment, will you?” She asks, holding up a hoof. I raise my PipBuck up to her. She opens it up to the map screen and places a marker. “Here is a cryopod location. Grimoire should be able to teleport you two blocks away from it. Once you are done there, return to Icicle Lab. I will be waiting there,” She tells me.

“You aren’t coming with us?” I ask.

She shakes her head. “Of course not. If I offered to go, you would refuse it. Or, specifically your companions. Despite the fact that I cannot be injured, you all don’t want to put me in harm’s way,” Serendipity explains. “And some of you don’t trust me fully yet. So, I will wait at your lab.”

“I...I see? Well, will you be able to make it there? It is kind of far from here. If we use Grimoire’s teleportation, we might end up waiting for you,” I tell her.

“I will get there before you. A train is leaving soon from nearby, I will take that to speed up my journey. I have only to make a slight detour to acquire some caps to pay for the ride,” Serendipity informs me.

“And, you aren’t going to be attacked or anything on your way?” I ask.

“Of course not. I know what is going to happen, remember?” She tells me. “I know when and where I will be attacked and where I will not be. Even if I do decide to let myself be attacked, I can easily avoid any attack that comes my way. This body is light and maneuverable, after all. But, I must be going or I will miss that train. See you at your lab,” Serendipity says as she begins walking up the stairs. She stops a few steps up and turns back to us, “Oh, and this bunker is rigged to explode in about five minutes,” and then continues climbing up.

I exchange glances with everyone else as she leave us. “I guess we should get going…” I mutter as I walk over to Grimoire. “This is the next location,” I tell him as I show him my PipBuck’s map marker. “You able to get us close?”

He looks at it and then nods. “Like she said, I can take us two blocks away from it. I wonder how I never found it when I was in the area,” He murmurs. His horn begins glowing and once again there is a blinding flash and then wisps of smoke surround me as my hooves hit pavement. A moment later, I collapse onto the ground with a groan.

“Ugh, I don’t think I will get used to this,” I mutter as the others turn to look at me. My uneasiness fades quicker than before and I pull up my map. “Okay, so we just need to go a ways east of here,” I mutter. I look around and notice large letters on the mountains in the distance. They are fairly old and beaten, and a few have fallen, but I can still tell that it is the Applewood sign, just lacking a P, E, and O. Ah Las Pegasus…

Our group starts walking down the street. Things are pretty calm. We don’t find a single living thing as we make our way to the destination. When we arrive, I’m slightly confused. “This is the location of a pod?” I question as we stare at the storefront of a party store. It certainly isn’t a top secret facility or anything. “Let’s look around, I guess?” I say as I lead the way inside. We spread around the inside of the store and look for any indication of some super secret hidden lair.

I make my way behind the counter and start poking around in the cabinets and the register. I do find some bits inside the register and some party junk in the cabinets, but nothing that stands out. No hidden buttons or stairs leading down or even up. “Anyone finding anything?” I call out as I keep looking.

“Nothing on my end,” Grimoire replies as he looks between some shelves of old balloons and string.

“Just moldy clothing over here,” Cora calls over.

“Streamers mum!” Macro calls out.

“Junk,” Hal mutters.

“There is a lot of stuff here, but nothing that really has any particular use or anything,” Soar tells me. She continues to ramble on about how ribbons, while cute, serve no real purpose in the Wasteland.

I let out a sigh as I stop rummaging around behind the counter and look around the store again. If there is nothing in here...my eyes wander to the back door. I wonder if there is anything out back? “I’m going to check outside,” I tell the others as I make my way to the back door and step outside.

There isn’t much out here. The only thing that stands out is a pair out outhouses. I shrug and take a look inside of them. Yep, normal outhouses. Cramped, dirty, not much else inside. Wait, is that a lever? Outhouses don’t flush, so why is there a lever? “Hey, I think I found something,” I call back inside as I inspect the lever. The sound of the others joining me outside is drowned out as I pull the lever. The next moment, the floor of the outhouse drops out from under me and I find myself sliding down a tube. I scream out as the floor above me puts itself back in place as if nothing happened.

For almost a full minute I slide down the tube, screaming all the while, until the tube levels out and I emerge from the tube and fall onto a padded surface. I sheepishly open my eyes and discover a small room filled with mattresses and a single door leading out. As I get to my hooves, I hear some bangging in the tube I just came from. A moment later, Cora flies out of the tube and lands in front of me. She is followed shortly after by the others, one at a time until we are all in the same room.

“Well, I think it is safe to assume we found the right place,” I mutter as I walk towards the door. It is a simple pink door with the MoM logo on it. “A Ministry of Morale facility, huh?” I open the door and the room beyond flashes with pink warning lights.

Pinkie Pie’s voice comes over a PA system a moment later. “Intruders have been detected. Please make sure your IDs are displayed to prevent wrongful disintegration!”