The harem only had a short while to tidy themselves up and get back into position, while trying to look as professional as possible, before Attentive Eye announced the next applicant.

In strutted a tall earth mare with an emerald green coat, while her mane and tail was the color of platinum gold and her tail was styled with whorls though her manestyle was a cresting comb over and an unbound ponytail, and light purple eyes gazed at Luna, Thomas, Moonlight, and Silver. Unlike her predecessor, Apple Honey came wearing clothes. Her red flannel shirt was short and tied tightly around her barely contained breasts, leaving her midriff exposed. She wore short, thigh high blue jean pants that had her cutie marks stitched on the sides, which were three green apples. There was a noticeable clopping sound as she walked forward, which suggested that she had horseshoes on. She was tall, like Surprise, but also well-muscled, clearly developed due to a life of hard labor on the farm. Her body was almost a dead ringer for Applejack’s, if Thomas was remembering correctly.

“Howdy, ya’ll.” She tilted her head in greeting. Her voice was gentle and feminine, but her tone was distinctly tomboyish. “Name’s Apple Honey, most folks just call me Honey, ‘n’ Ah’m just pleased as punch to be here.”

Luna extended her hand, palm down, just as before. Apple Honey took it, but rather than kissing the back of Luna’s knuckles, she daringly opted to slip the alicorn’s middle finger into her mouth where she sucked on it with loud slurping noises. Thomas watched as Silver and Moonlight pulled back in shock at the mare’s brashness, while Talon grinned in approval. Luna, smiling mischievously, could not help but toy with the mare, moving her hand this way and that as the apple farmer followed.

After a moment’s thought, Thomas realized that Apple Honey was trying to impress Luna as Surprise had done. To win the approval of Luna and her concubines, it made sense to approach the situation with a go-big-or-go-home mentality. Seems like the system’s a little rigged against introverts, Thomas thought, worried that he’d have likely failed if asked to interview for a position in Luna’s harem.

“I like these new applicants,” Talon declared with an amused chuckle. “They’re fun.”

“Certainly a fair grade above the last batch,” Luna grinned wryly, “for what little that is worth.”

Honey finally released Luna’s finger with a soft pop and stood at semi-attention across from her interviewers. “Ah take it yer referrin’ to the lot that secretary was tellin’ me about?”

“Depends,” Talon said. “What have you heard?”

“That they were a bunch o’ snakes in the grass, all smiles ‘n’ no substance.” Honey crossed her arms over her ample chest with a huff. “Just makes me sick ta think there are ponies out there who’d actually try taken advantage of a Princess like that.” She snorted irately. “But Ah don’t wanna get bogged down with the negative stuff.”

“Very well. Shall we begin with introductions?” Luna motioned to the other concubines.

Out of the corner of his eye, Thomas saw Silver’s lip curl into a brief smile.

As with before, Moonlight was first as the mares reached over the table to shake hands. “Pleasure to meet ya’ll. Cousin AJ says you lot helped save Ponyville from a rampagin’ ursa.”

“That we did,” Moonlight acknowledged, noticing the way Honey’s eyes fell below the neck line. It didn’t necessarily bother her to have her breasts stared at, but she did clear her throat to let the mare know she was being a little rude by not looking her in the eye. “It was a hard fought battle, but one all of Ponyville should be proud of for how they rallied together.”

“No argument here,” Honey agreed and moved on to the human, shaking his hand. “Ah’d know that filly face anywhere, what with how much AJ ‘n’ her sister keep writin’ about cha.”

Thomas shrugged off the comment about him looking like a filly, unsure how he felt about growing numb to such a comparison. As Honey’s eyes looked him over appraisingly, Thomas felt little guilt in returning the gesture. She was an impressive specimen. “It was pure adrenaline,” he admitted. “Not sure if I could do that again.”

“If yer smart, which Ah reckon ya are, ya won’t want to try somethin’ that crazy again.” Her hand squeezed tighter, but not so much that it was painful as she stared into his eyes. “Even so, ya did it. Ya saved mah little cousin, an’ that means a lot ta the Apple clan, an’ me personally. Far as Ah’m concerned, that makes you kin.”

Thomas smiled, his cheeks reddening at the heartfelt meaning in Honey’s words. From what he understood of the Apple family, being referred to as kin was about the highest compliment they could give. However, Thomas felt a bit of unease as he watched the earth mare move to the next pony in line.

“Silver Bell,” Honey greeted next. “Ah’m afraid Ah’m not very familiar with you, but yer a lovely mare Ah hope ta get ta know better.”

Silver smiled. “Even though my breasts are on the small side?” she asked testingly.

“Aww, Ah don’t mind none.” Honey made sure Silver saw her eyes crawl across the bat mare’s chest. “Teats are teats, an’ Ah love ‘em.” She snuck a quick glance at Luna’s chest and licked her lips.

Sentiment shared, Thomas agreed. Although, since bisexuality is basically the norm around here, does that even need to be said?

“In that case, I look forward to getting to know you as well,” Silver replied without a hint of disapproval, much to Thomas’ relief.

“An’ you must be Talon, self-proclaimed sexiest griffon in Equestria.” Honey took Talon’s claw in hand, making a show of how hard she was squeezing.

Talon just smiled, seemingly happy at the challenge. “You know it, babe. Glad to see my reputation precedes me.”

“In more ways than one,” Honey added with a grin. “You’re the third hero from Ponyville, ain’t ya?”

“That’s me.” Talon released her grip of the mare’s hand and examined her claws idly. “Hero by day, sex goddess by other day.”

Luna motioned for Honey to sit, allowing Thomas to go through what he’d seen. Friendly country attitude and fair bit of daring. So far so good. Thomas almost reached his note cards, but decided against it.

“I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume you’re the sort who likes it when people are straightforward about things, am I right?”

“They say assumptions make asses out o’ all of us,” Honey said with an unconcerned shrug. “But yeah. Ah’d wager that’s a fair thing ta say.”

“Before we begin with the questions,” Thomas interlocked his fingers and set them on the table, “I’d like to say something so you know I don’t mean any offense.”

Honey raised a brow skeptically. “‘Kay…”

“When I was little, I was diagnosed with a disorder called dyslexia; something, it seems, Equestrian doctors don’t really have a grasp on. It’s a reading disorder.” He noted the way Honey’s eyes widened and ears stood at attention. “In grade school I had to take remedial lessons. They even sent me to a different room with other dyslexic kids during certain parts of the class.”

“Sounds embarrassin’,” Honey said neutrally.

“In hindsight, but I really didn’t think so at the time. For me, it was just an excuse to get out of the harder portions of the spelling test, at least at first.” Thomas sighed. “I remember my parents sitting me down and quizzing me with note cards, especially if I didn’t do so well on a test.”

“Yer lucky,” Honey said. “Mah parents just said an apple farmer didn’t need readin’ ‘n’ writin’ all that much, so Ah spent the first part of school days at home doin’ chores. Ah guess Ah was a little like you at first, thinking Ah was lucky to get out of lessons, but…” she was unable to finish her response.

“I remember one time I’d spent almost a minute reading and rereading a single line until my parents finally had me stop. I guess they didn’t want me to get upset, which I was, but feeling like a failure didn’t exactly help much.”

Honey’s lips finally broke into a sympathetic grin. “Ah can see that,” she snorted. “Well, Ah guess things paid off fer you, anyway. Don’t need to be much of a reader ta stick it ta the Princess.”

“I’m actually writing a book.”

“You what?” Honey was taken aback.

“Yeah. With Moonlight,” he indicated the unicorn who waved in acknowledgement. “She does a lot of the grunt work, but I edit to make sure everything’s written properly.”

“Y-you’ve got what Ah got,” Honey murmured in disbelief, “but you can write?”

“I’ll never be as fast as those without my condition, but I’ve got a mind that’s overflowing with ideas.” Thomas sat up straight, beaming at the mare. “I’ve got dyslexia, but that doesn’t make me stupid. Anyone who says otherwise can kiss my pasty white ass.”

Honey managed to choke down her sobbing chortles before they could escape, though she did have to wipe her watering eyes. Beaming down at the little human, she once more offered her hand, which he took. “No. Ah’d say yer one of the smartest ponies Ah’ve ever met, even if ya ain’t a pony.”

“Damn straight!” Talon cheered, pumping her fist.

“Finely spoken, my little human,” Luna sighed happily.

“You’re so cute when you’re inspired,” Moonlight cooed, fussing Thomas’ hair.

Silver gave a relenting sigh, looking upon the earth mare with newfound sympathy before turning back to Thomas. “I believe there was meant to be a question at the end of that.”

“Right,” Thomas chuckled as she retrieved his hand. “Well, Silver brought up that you left your final comment section blank. She said it’s important for applicants to share why they’re applying, and I’m inclined to agree. So, Honey, why don’t you tell us why you want to be a member of Luna’s harem?”

Honey straightened up in her cushion. “A fair enough question, Ah s’pose. This might sound bad, but Ah’m not too sure Ah have a reason.” She looked up at Luna, her prior confidence waning somewhat. “Ah mean, Ah do have a reason. Ah just… don’t really know how ta say it.”

Thomas watched as Luna frowned, clearly dissatisfied with this answer. Damn it! No way that heartfelt speech is going to waste this early. As the human racked his brain with something to say, anything to help the mare regain her prior confidence, Silver cleared her throat.

“Perhaps an example is called for,” the bat mare suggested. “My family line, like so many others, has always dedicated itself to the service of the Princess of the Moon. Where others are famed for producing gallant warriors, mine specialized in the training of lovers. It’s a very old tradition, and one we’re quite proud of. I suspect a member of the Apple clan can sympathize.” She paused as Honey nodded gratefully. “Yet of all my siblings, I was the only one to answer the call of duty. Do you know why that is?”

Honey shrugged. “Can’t rightly say.”

“Me neither, but I am going to give it a try anyway,” Silver said with utmost seriousness. “We all had the same training, but I knew even when I was little that I was the only one who ever really took it seriously. They might have teased me about it, but as a filly I really did believe that Luna was going to return and that I would be the one to carry on the old tradition. I believed it with all my heart, that my Princess,” she gazed up at Luna and took her hand, “would return to us, and that she would need me by her side.” She paused, apparently losing herself in her alicorn’s eyes.

“More or less the same, but nothing quite so proufound,” Talon chimed in. “I always had a feeling I was destined for more, but never really knew what. Then one day I saw Sunbutt and knew there was nothing I wanted more than her. Lucky me she shared the sentiment.”

“That’s it!” Honey beamed, glancing gratefully between Silver and Talon before settling back on Luna. “Princess,” she tilted her head in a respectful bow. “Ah’m a simple mare from a simple farm. Ain’t got no fancy pedigrees or ancient birthrights. Ah know there are a lot of ponies out there, most of ‘em fancier than Ah could ever be. But…”

“Speak truly and from the heart, Apple Honey,” Luna beckoned. “To be my concubine, nothing less will be accepted.”

“But Ah think you need more than just fanciness,” she gestured towards Silver and Talon. “No offense.”

“You are forgiven for calling me fancy,” Talon said good-naturedly while grabbing hold of Silver’s hand, wordlessly stopping her from replying. “For the record, it’s pronounced ‘sexy beast’.”

Honey laughed appreciatively. “Mah folks said Ah was just bein’ stupid, but the moment Ah heard about ya from the papers, Ah just couldn’t get the idea out of mah head.” She ruffled the left side of her mane. “Ah just kept seeing ya, all cooped up in yer fancy tower, eaten fancy food, dealing with fancy over perfumed ponies day an’ night, an’ Ah thought to mahself: wouldn’t a mare in that position like a nice home grown apple as a break from all them fancy quiches ‘n’ such?” Her idea finally concluded, Honey sat straight and proud as the Princess stared her down. “Ah hope that makes sense.”

“Am I to understand, little Apple,” Luna licked her lips, “that you are offering yourself to be devoured?”

“Mah name is Honey,” she fluttered her eyelashes playfully, not missing a beat. “Be a shame ta let mah namesake go ta waste, Princess,” she said with a giggle. “But all flirtin’ aside, what Ah really mean is ta give ya a more down ta earth look at yer kingdom. If you’ll have me, Ah’d like ta be the one ta give ya a taste of Equestria’s workin’ folks, how we’re really like when we’re not bowin’ ‘n’ scrapin’ just ‘cause a lot of ponies think we should be.”

Luna touched a finger to her lips. “So you wish to act as a representative of working class earth ponies, to ensure that I do not lose sight of your ilk amidst all the, as you say, fancy perfumed ponies. Is that accurate?”

Honey giggled. “That, an’ Ah just thought you’d appreciate some good ol’ fashioned Apple ruttin’.”

Thomas felt the brush of a tail against his lower back, pulling him out of his engrossment with what was being said and reminding him of his job. “I,” he cleared his throat. “I think that answers my question well enough. Who’s next?”

“I would volunteer, but I’m afraid my question was taken from me,” Silver smiled with faux accusation at Thomas. “Your answer was more than satisfying, so I shall pass. Thomas can have a second turn.”

“You sure?” he asked.

“By all means.” Silver gestured amicably.

Surprised by the opportunity, Thomas decided to give his next question some careful thought. Going over all that he had heard so far, his face took on a look of mild horror as he recalled what Honey had called him earlier. “If we’re kin, is that gonna cause any problems for us, ya know, down the road?”

Honey blinked in confusion, retracting her hand. “Not sure what yer gettin’ at, little fella.”

Thomas had a sinking feeling that he knew what he was about to learn, but decided to ask anyway. “There’s no problem with sleeping with relatives, even if we aren’t related?”

“Sure as shootin’ there ain’t.” Honey shook her head in amusement. “That don’t even make sense. Don’t know what it was like fer you, but a herd livin’ out on the frontier, on those nights when it gets below freezin’; they ain’t got no choice but to sleep together. Things ain’t as cold as they used ta be, what with all them new magical heatin’ lamps, but snugglin’s still nice.”

“Sex,” Moonlight interjected. “Humans have very different views on sex than we do. In this case, he’s asking if there is a taboo on incest, I think?” she asked and Thomas nodded in affirmation.

“Ah,” Honey said in understanding. “Well, Ah guess it all depends on what you call incest. Like, it’s fine if it’s just me ‘n’ my siblin’s ‘n’ cousins jus’ foolin’ around when there’s no heat. But if there is heat, then Ah’d say it’s downright deplorable if me ‘n’ mah brothers were ta get too frisky, if ya know what Ah’m sayin’.”

“I… think I do,” Thomas acknowledged, noting the use of qualifiers. She specifically said brothers, which probably means sisters wouldn’t be an issue. “So its fine so long as there’s no risk of pregnancy, right?”

Honey nodded. She and the other mares all looked pleased at his understanding.

Siblings and cousins, Thomas mentally noted. He hoped the qualifier implicitly excluded other kinds of relations, but didn’t want to press the issue.

“Good thing too,” Honey continued. “‘Specially with all them fillies ‘n’ colts hittin’ puberty an’ gettin’ all curious ‘n’ hormonal. Who else are they gonna turn to, ‘cept family?”

“Very true,” Moonlight agreed, surprising Thomas. “I don’t know what I’d have done without my sisters to help me through my heats.”

“Such is only natural,” Silver added matter-of-factly, earning an exacerbated eye roll from the human.

“It’s just all in good fun,” Talon shrugged, this time earning a cold stare. “What?”

“For some reason, that one doesn’t surprise me,” Thomas admitted.

“Why do I get the feeling you’re being less than complimentary right now?” Talon asked with a glare.

Honey cleared her throat, breaking the man and wren from their glares as she gestured up at the mare who had remained noticeably silent during the exchange.

Luna just gave a contented smile and shrugged.

Thomas opened his mouth to speak, but found he had no words. The more he thought about it, after everything he’d been told about the mare’s past, after everything he’d seen the mare do, he’d have been more surprised to learn Princest was where they drew the line.

“Ah reckon it’s not mah place ta ask, but…” Honey was leaning forward in anticipation.

“You want we, Princess Luna,” she folded her arms under her chest, propping up her breasts as she pouted sultrily, “to divulge the intimate details,” she licked her lips as her fingers ran along her cleavage, “of actions that may or may not have taken place, involving our big, bountiful sister and ourselves in,” she fluttered her eyelids coyly, “compromising positions?”

Honey had leaned so far forward that her breasts were acting as support against the table and a small puddle of drool was collecting beneath her chin.

Luna touched her chin, making a thoughtful sound. “No,” she said with coy finality.

Honey frowned dejectedly. “Ma always told me if Ah didn’t have something nice ta say, Ah shouldn’t say nothin’ at all.”

“Permission granted to speak honestly,” Luna allowed.

“Yer so mean, but Ah’m okay with that.” Honey’s words were met with laughter from her interviewers as she straightened up.

Was that really just a coincidence? Thomas thought.

“My turn,” Talon said as she took the clipboard, examining it quietly before she found what she was looking for. “In herd status it says you’ve got a herd of three, including yourself. Being in a harem’s a lot like being in a family. So if we’re getting you, I’d like to know who else is along for the ride.”

“Sure thing,” Honey beamed proudly. “There’s mah cousin Jonagold, an’ our stallion Big Plow.”

Thomas exhaled. Potential for sex puns aside, I suppose I should be grateful they’re not siblings.

“Jona’s a petite little thing an’ real cute. Big Plow is, well, he lives up to his name, so whatever yer imaginin’s probably pretty close.” Honey tittered. “An’ before ya ask, no. Plow’s only an Apple by herd, not blood. Me and Jona were like two peas in a pod growing up, so when she said she had her sights on that hulk of a stallion an’ wanted mah help, Ah just couldn’t say no. They’re both awful sweet, an’ Ah love ‘em ta death.”

So she’s used to sleeping with a Big Mac? Thomas bemoaned, cursing the inevitability of comparing himself to someone who’s arm was probably thicker than his waist, let alone cock sizes. Why me?

“You made it sound as though your parents didn’t approve of your decision to apply as a concubine,” Silver chimed in, “but you wrote that your family helped you with the application.”

“Sorry fer the misunderstandin’. By family, Ah meant mah herd, not mah natal herd or the clan,” Honey corrected. “They’ve actually been real supportive so far, but we agreed it’d be best if they stayed home until Ah get things settled. Plow’s been especially eager to see what life in the capitol’s like.”

“Out of curiosity, who is your lead, if you have one?” Moonlight asked.

“Hands down, that’d be Jona,” Honey declared. “She might be tiny, but she’s a feisty one. Ah learned from watchin’ her ta never underestimate smaller mares.” Her eyes fell on Silver. “Might seem like they’d be easy to take, but they’re the last ones ya want ta get in a scrap with if ya can help it.”

Silver beamed, clearly pleased by this assessment.

“If we’re still going off the question of your family,” Thomas interjected. “I’d like to know what they plan to do for work, you know, if you’re accepted. I mean, if they move here with you, is there really much work for farmers?”

“That’s a mighty thoughtful thing ta ask,” Honey said. “But don’t worry none. Plenty of fields on the north side of the mountain lookin’ fer a few extra hands. Don’t matter the crop. Plant an Apple on a farm, they’ll grow ‘n’ bloom.”

When it seemed like the discussion of Honey’s family had reached its conclusion, Moonlight was handed the clipboard. She frowned as she flipped back and forth through the pages, having difficulty finding something that might warrant a question. Eventually she set the clipboard down and met Honey’s eyes. “To be honest, I’m having trouble thinking of anything,” she admitted. “Your preliminaries show you have strong family values and an honest disposition. Your reasons for joining suggest a deep commitment to not only your Princess, but an often overlooked segment of the Equestrian population. With everything I’ve seen and heard, I can’t think of any reason to question your character.”

Honey beamed brightly at that. “That’s mighty sweet of ya, sugar.” She then turned to survey the others. “So is that it, then?” she asked with cautious hope. “Did Ah pass?”

After sharing confirming nods with the others, Silver set the clipboard down. “Your training begins immediately.”

And there we have our token earth pony. As you might have guessed, her personality was largely based on Apple Jack’s, but, as with Surprise, I hope to gradually distance her from her mane six counterpart and help her bloom as a separate character. Only time will tell, not to mention constructive suggestions from my readers.

Also, after much debate with my editors and with myself, I’ve answered the incest question. It’s not taboo so long as there’s no risk of pregnancy.