“Welcome to mah home away from home!” Honey gestured dramatically to the humble little house.

“Yes. I have been here before.” Silver tittered elegantly at the larger mare’s antics and stepped forward. Honey then hurried ahead and rang the doorbell.

“Plow, Jona, we’re here!”

A second later, the door opened to the absolute tower of a stallion that was Big Plow. Before Honey could even react, the larger male pulled her into the tightest of bear hugs, lifting the tower of a mare right off the ground. She resisted a little, her dangling hooves kicking weakly and making them both laugh, but eventually she surrendered to her huggy fate. When Plow turned his big green eye on the far smaller mare, that’s when she tensed. She’d seen the way his muscles tightened around the great pillar that was Honey’s physique and couldn’t help but compare how she’d fair against such force. Unfortunately, she wasn’t given long to think before the brown behemoth gave her a frightfully winning smile, dropped Honey to the porch with a soft clop, and pulled her into his embrace. There was no escape.

He was much gentler, thankfully. That shouldn’t have been surprising, though. Any stallion who hugged this much with those tree trunk arms probably had plenty of experience with smaller, more fragile creatures. It stung Silver’s pride to think of herself as small and weak. The former was an unfortunate fluke of genetics, but the latter filled her to the brim with inexplicable shame. Worse, other feelings swirled in her gut, competing for her attention as she weakly returned the hug. It was only polite.

Most prominent among those feelings was an unavoidable sense of arousal. The stallion’s body was riddled with muscle. His arms were wide and mighty. Wrapped around her as they were, she felt safe behind his impenetrable shield. His pectorals seemed especially defined as they threatened to engulf her lithe frame. He smelled a lot like Honey, fruity and with just a hint of musky sweat. He didn’t feel sweaty, but some stallions just stank like that. It wasn’t his fault that his body’s assault on Silver’s senses made her own body want to retaliate by piercing his chest with her sharpened nipples.

“Whoa there,” the big stallion boomed in good humor, letting the mare down. “Watch those things. Ya might poke out an eye.”

Realizing what he was referring to, Silver covered her erect nipples while the earth ponies struggled not to laugh at her embarrassment. She wanted to yell at them, to defend her involuntary physical response, but no words came to mind that didn’t sound petulant. And, as if to add insult to injury, Plow’s body hadn’t reacted at all. Stupid sexy earth ponies!

“Easy, Plow,” Honey chided, stepping between them. “This one’s a li’l jumpy. Don’t wanna spook her into bitin’.”

Plow just shrugged his acceptance. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Those words left Silver curious. A few explanations came to mind, and she hoped there’d be a chance later in the night to investigate; a point in the conversation that wouldn’t feel awkward.

“But please, come inside.” He motioned his guest in. “Better hurry ‘efore Jona yells at us fer dawdlin’.”

Struck with fear from her mate’s wrathful scolding, Honey just pushed Silver the rest of the way in and closed the door behind them. Though she still had sense enough to quip, “That’s what she said.”

Silver could only groan her irritation at such a crass remark.

“Is she here?” The small yellow mare poked her head from around the corner. Spying Silver, she gave her warmest welcoming smile and came fully into view, wearing nothing but an apron. “Well aren’t ya’ll a sight fer sore eyes.” In the blink of an eye she’d closed the distance with the only pony who wasn’t taller than her. Her hug was restrained and the kiss she planted on Silver’s cheek was chaste yet affectionate.

Silver mirrored Jona’s actions, finding the gestures most inviting. “‘Tis a pleasure to be here.” She gave the entry hall a cursory glance. “You certainly know how to make a pony feel welcome.”

Planting her hands on her hips, Jona threw back her head and pushed out her chest in a flagrant show of pride. “If it don’t feel like home, it ain’t Apple.”

“C’mon Jona. We ain’t sellin’ right now,” complained Honey. “Hay, she’s already sold on me anyway.”

“Hush, you. Let’s get this scrawny thing ta the livin’ room. She looks like she could use a warm beverage, ‘n’ maybe a meal or three.”

“Just some tea would be nice,” Silver said as she allowed herself to be herded into the living room and onto a sizable couch. The couch was clearly designed for earth ponies. Besides the obvious size, which left Silver feeling rather foalish in comparison, there was also the design. Silver knew very little about the composition of couches, but something about this one made it look rather sturdy. Somepony could drop a boulder on the thing and Silver imagined it would be the stone that broke. It put the bat mare in mind of a humble farmer, neither bragging nor complaining as she humbly performed her backbreaking labor. Although the farmer was probably smiling in proud acknowledgment of her capabilities.

Yes. This was an earth pony’s couch.

“Ah’ll get it,” volunteered Plow, making himself scarce. “Ya’ll want sugar or anythin’?”

“Just some lemon would be nice. Thank you.”

“Ah’m so happy ya’ll could take time from yer busy schedule to visit,” gushed Jona as she planted herself beside Silver.

Honey, unsure of what else to do, sat to Silver’s other side.

“I imagine your schedule is far more demanding than mine, but yes. I am also glad that-”

“Enough o’ that fancy talk,” Jona interrupted. “We won’t judge if ya wanna relax. C’mon! Kick yer horseshoes off ‘n’ let it all out.”

Silver laughed appreciably. “That is lovely of you to offer, but I am afraid I cannot.”

Jona looked huffy at this response. “‘N’ why not?”

Honey grinned, curious as to how these two small yet willful mares might come to blows. Although, if they were going to fight over anything, a differing definition of manners seemed like the most likely subject. Honey wondered how she might react if the worst came to pass. Trying to separate them by hand would be like asking to lose a finger; a thought that made her smile morbidly. Worst case scenario: she’d grab Jona by the ankles, chuck her at the wall, and then, before Silver could react, she’d scrunch her into a ball and pitch her out the window. Of course she was sure it wouldn’t come to that, but a small part of her felt guilty for hoping it would, just to satisfy her curiosity.

“How do I put this?” Silver asked herself. “Well, you seem quite proud of your hospitality, yes?”

“Sure ‘s shootin’! It’s a matter o’ pride as an Apple.”

“Well, are you willing to relax the standards instilled in you by your family?”

Jona blinked once, confused. She blinked a second time, more thoughtful. By the time of the third blink, she’d gotten it and made an ‘o’ with her mouth. “Fair enough,” she conceded, no longer looking like she was ready to go to war over Silver’s relaxation. “Ah can respect a mare who respects her family’s teachin’s.”

“Likewise.” Silver bowed courteously. “Thank you for respecting my lingering fear of my dame bursting through the door and scolding me if I so much as slouch.” They all shared a laugh. They all understood the inherent, lingering fear of disappointing parents with high expectations.

Plow chose that moment to come back in, carrying a tray like a waiter. Upon it were four cups of beverages and a plate of cookies. “Fer the lovely ladies.” That set the ladies tittering again. “Careful now. The cookies ‘r’ still hot.”

After feeling the rising heat warm her palm, Silver snatched the topmost cookie from the pile and took a long inhale before biting. “Mmmh! These are delicious.”

Plow beamed. “Ah hope so. Ah made ‘em mahself.” He took a cookie for his own, along with one of the beverages over to a nearby chair. The other ponies took this chance to grab their own treats, enjoying them in the comfort of a modern home in a very picturesque representation of civilization.

That was what Silver thought, anyway. She also wondered if this had been set up deliberately to make her feel more welcome. If so, it was working. However, her expression fell as she looked down into her tea.

“Somethin’ wrong, sugar?” Honey set a hand on the smaller mare’s shoulder.

“The opposite actually,” Silver began. “You have such a lovely home. I confess to feeling a little jealous.”

“Ya’ll should ‘o seen the place when we got it,” Plow spoke up. “It was a bit ‘f a fixer-upper, but nothin’ a bit o’ elbow grease couldn’t handle.”

“Ah, so that’s why this place feels so homely,” she praised while surveying the furniture. “It was literally made with love.”

“Jus’ like mah cookies.”

“It’s the strongest force in the universe!” Jona proclaimed. “Whole civilizations rose ‘n’ fell on the whims o’ love.”

“Careful Princess Cadance don’t hear ya,” Plow cautioned. “Wouldn’t want her realizin’ she’s actually the top mare in town. She’d bake cookies stronger ‘an any army.”

Silver laughed, as did Honey, but both noticed Jona’s contemplative look.

“Is that a thing?” she asked of Silver, whispering as if fearing eavesdroppers. “Could she really take over the kingdom with love?”

Honey and Silver shared a quizzical look.

“Ah dunno,” admitted the tallest mare. “Ain’t never thought about it.”

“Neither have I. Although, now that I am, I wonder if the both of us are not overdue to meet with her pinkness.”

“Ah don’t think Ah’ve ever seen her around the castle, though. Does she have different hours?”

“I could not say. I had to wait in a que for weeks just to interview with Princess Luna, and that was only after Thomas gave me a recommendation.”

“Only a couple weeks fer me, but yeah,” agreed Honey. “We gotta make an appointment, or do we get some kind o’ semi-royal privilege?”

“We had best just ask Luna. Cadence is still a Princess and no doubt busy with princessly duties, although I’m certain she would make the time to see us.” Silver then turned to Plow. “What is so funny?”

“Both o’ ya,” he gestured between the tallest and shortest mares in the room. “Ya’ll ‘r’ talkin’ ‘bout goin’ up to a Princess like it’s nothin’.”

“Now Ah’m wondering if Ah should apply fer a castle job,” Jona added. “The pay’s good ‘n’ they seem ta have a lot o’ perks.”

Once more Honey and Silver looked into one another’s eyes. It was true that they were discussing meeting a Princess of all ponies with an astonishing level of casualness.

“Ya know, if’n Ah told mahself from a year ago what Ah’d be doin’ now, Ah’d probably slap mahself fer thinkin’ mahself a liar.”

Silver, demonstrating the height of poise and etiquette, added, “I cannot confirm, nor deny my hypothetical jumping off the walls in what could only be described as a happy dance.” And she took the most refined sip of tea that anypony had ever taken in that house.

Inevitably, after a noble effort of restraining themselves, the earth ponies all burst out laughing. They were deep belly laughs, the sort that caused one’s sides to ache and the face to painfully strain. Such laughter ultimately proved contagious as even Silver fell victim. Fortunately all were able to move their snacks to safety so that nothing was spilled. It was several seconds before the ponies could speak normally again.

“Ah like you, Silver,” Jona admitted. “Yer a nice, refined kind o’ mare, but ya don’t let it get ta yer head.”

“Thank you for that. I must say that you and your home are just as lovely.” And she took another sip of her tea. She considered raising the issue of her jealousy again, but decided that doing so would make her a rude guest. If need be, she’d raise the issue back with the harem.

“Say, Ah was wonderin’ if ya’ll could set a few things straight,” Jona inquired.

“I will if I am able.”

“How would ya say mah little Honey fairs in bed?”

“Jona!”

“What? It’s a perfectly reasonable question,” Jona replied matter-of-factly.

“It’s a perfectly private question is what it is!”

“Not like ya got anythin’ ta hide in this house,” Jona pointed out while taking a very ladylike sip of her own beverage. “Everypony here’s seen it, felt it, spanked it, ‘n’ done everythin’ else under Luna’s moon. Far as Ah’m concerned, this room’s full o’ experts in the great science o’ tappin’ that plot.”

Honey looked mortified that her lead mare, the one whom she trusted to guide this herd, had so brazenly come out and asked such a question. She was squirming in place, suddenly very self-conscious about her plot and everypony’s apparent familiarity with it. It only now struck her how the very concept of two herds was inherently awkward. She realized that her past explanation to Thomas had been flawed, because she’d not been forced to confront that awkwardness until just now. It was like having two groups of friend’s who’d bonded over very different interest meet, and failing to see eye-to-eye. But this was worse than those groups of friends not clicking, or even coming to blows over differing interests. This was the two groups recognizing their mutual interest in her, the shared friend, and coming together to bask in the dirt they each had upon her. Truly this was the worst possible outcome.

Jona just sat there, her demeanor calm and her expression patient yet expectant. From her position she had a clear view of Honey, her beloved herd mate. Honey was a true beauty, meeting earth pony standards in mind, body, and spirit, and then giving that little bit extra effort, because that’s what earth ponies did. Honey was a true beauty, her strength unmatched, but it was in her moments of weakness that she was truly adorable. Jona felt her heart swell as she watched how the tall mare felt comfortable enough to show this awkward side of hers. It meant she trusted everypony present, which further added to her liking of Silver for winning over the lovable lug.

And, had Jona known the word, she might also reflect on the meaning and implications of schadenfreude.

Plow, wisest of them all, slapped a hand over his muzzle and did everything possible to conceal his very existence. The harem was still a peculiar concept that, as a pony on the outside, he knew that he might never understand. It bothered him a little that there was this part of his herd mate’s life that he could never be a part of, but he loved her. He trusted her to look out for herself, for him, and the herd, so he wouldn’t pry. If she had something that needed saying, she’d say it. That was just how Honey was, and he was glad for it. Also, he didn’t know if it was appropriate for a stallion to be included on what may or may not have been mare talk. Even so, his curiosity was making demands of him. He’d leave if asked, but not a moment sooner.

Silver was also uncertain on how to approach such an inquiry. The rule of the harem was that harem matters could not be discussed with outsiders. Honey’s herd seemed like they were on the outside, but their status as Honey’s herd put them into a gray area; at least as Silver saw it. She knew that Princess Celestia would occasionally invite the herds of her concubines to join them in bed, but that was at their discretion. Luna had done the same in the past, so it stood to reason that she’d pop the question sooner or later, if only to satisfy her carnal curiosity. Was the idea that they’d probably be invited someday sufficient justification? That seemed like bending the rules to a degree that left the bat mare uncomfortable.

Silver thought about what her dame might say to such an excuse, and internally cringed at the scolding she’d no doubt receive. Defying the sanctity of an alicorn’s bed would, no doubt, be condemned as blasphemy. However, the spirit of the rule was for the protection of the Princess. That was the most logical interpretation. Concubines were still free to discuss their friendships and sex lives with whomever they wished, so long as the Princess’ privacy was protected. The Princess was at the core of the harem, so if she wasn’t mentioned, was it still a harem issue? And what would Luna say on the matter?

After much deliberation, Silver finally settled on an answer that would fall well within the admittedly vague boundaries of the harem’s rules. She began by taking a sip of her tea. It was a very careful, very slow sip to drag out the moment. Anticipation needed to be built, which added to the drama. She’d picked that up from Thomas’ stories and appreciated how such techniques enhanced the mood. Giving a very satisfied sigh, Silver smacked her lips and turned bodily to face Jona, her posture ladylike and perfect. With the most refined of smiles, she spoke in the most patronizing way that was equinely, and said, “She does her best.”

Jona’s laughter was a deep, booming uproar that seemed to shake the various knickknacks of the house. Tears flowed from her eyes. Silver feared the neighbors might file a complaint. Plow had both hands covering his muzzle in what appeared to be a losing fight. His body repeatedly convulsed as peels of laughter threatened to break free, resulting in him sliding off the chair and onto the floor. If one were to walk in just then, they might fear he was suffering a stroke. Naturally, Honey appeared to be handling this admission the best out of all of the earth ponies. Clearly all those lessons in self-control had paid off. Mouth open and teeth bared in a silent scream of rage, she was merely gesturing that she wanted to strangle the life out of Silver instead of actually doing it.

Pleased with herself for provoking such extreme reactions, Silver took an extra refined, aristocratic sip of tea. Even her satisfied ‘ah’ had an air of culture and class to it. Her dame would be proud; assuming she didn’t join Plow laughing on the floor.

Honey finally found her voice, and her words were as restrained as they were fitting. “Yer gonna pay fer this,” she informed through labored breaths. “Somehow, someway, Ah’m gonna make ya pay.”

Struck by another burst of wit, Silver began patting her naked sides. “Oh dear. Silly me. It seems I forgot my wallet.” Turning slowly to stare up at the big mare looming dangerously overhead, Silver fought to maintain her straight face as she added, “Would you take an I-owe-you?”

Honey gave a cry like a savage beast, her fingers digging into her own scalp as her head thrashed around. She looked like she might pull out some of her lovely mane. Jona’s booming belly laugh had gone on for too long, and had devolved into breathless wheezing. She looked like she was in pain, but also like she didn’t know if she wanted it to end or not. Plow had lost the fight against himself and was competing with Honey for who could make the loudest sounds. He was rolling around, bumping into things, and it was nothing short of a miracle that nothing fell or broke.

It was a struggle for Silver to maintain her poise in the middle of such chaos. Desperate chortles were at the gates, begging to be let out, but she held strong. Her aristocratic scowl might have curled into a grin and the occasional chuckle snort might have breached her defenses once or thrice, but she held strong. She held strong, the model of noble elegance. Besides, she’d think up a way to turn the tables later. Although these things had to be planned carefully. To bring down divine justice in front of Honey’s herd might make the big mare lose face, which would be inexcusable. And even if she avoided stepping over the line, there was still the risk of repercussions. She knew Honey was the sort of mare who would make good on her word. It was the pride of the Apples, after all. A spanking that made it impossible for her to sit for a week would only be the beginning as the earth mare turned the bat mare’s own techniques against her.

It was some time before the house had finally calmed. Jona was hanging off of Silver and laughing like she’d had too much to drink.

Plow, sensing that somepony needed to be the adult around here, had intercepted Honey’s wrath by pulling her into his lap as he sat back on the chair. There was nothing lewd about the action, nor in how he held her or patted her head. The act was paternal in nature, resembling a parent trying to calm down a very large child, but not in a patronizing or sarcastic way. That would just make things worse. He embraced her with his love, his touch passing on his affections and reminding her that she was still cared for. He did this until the tension left her body, and then he did it some more until he was certain that any homicidal urges were thoroughly pacified. To the best of his ability, the warm firmness of her expansive plot atop his muscled thighs was ignored, although it still felt nice.

“Ya’ll wanna know a li’l somethin’ ‘bout how Silver is in bed?”

Hearing her tone and looking into her eyes, Plow’s expression fell. He saw that his efforts had only mostly succeeded, and that his beloved still had revenge on the brain. It was probably too much to expect otherwise, but he was allowed his hopes. But being a practical pony, he maintained a gentle yet unyielding grip around the mare’s body, just in case things escalated beyond words. He hoped that if the worse came to pass, Jona would be mindful enough to do the same with Silver.

“Ah already told ya ‘bout the ropes ‘n’ spankin’s, right?”

“Yes you did,” Jona confirmed, still chuckling. “And Ah’ll admit, that was pretty… interestin’.”

Silver scoffed. On the one hand, she was a little upset with Honey for having already revealed the harem’s secrets like that. Granted, it was using the bat mare’s own logic, but it was the principle of the thing. On the other hand, she scoffed again. “Say what you want,” she challenged. “I have nothing to hide. How about you tell them about the time I tied your wrists and ankles like a pig and… well, I’d rather not spoil anything,” she snickered smugly.

Honey shook her head. “Nah. Ah was thinkin’ more like a couple nights ago. Remember?”

Silver’s face scrunched in thought. She remembered that night well, but couldn’t think of anything embarrassing. Nothing she’d done seemed like suitable fodder for Honey to use against her. Unless…

“Remember what ya did ta,” she paused, looked around the room conspiratorially, and whispered, “the big mare.”

Silver felt her blood run cold. She wouldn’t.

“Who’s the big mare? That Surprise gal?” Plow asked. “She’s cute. Looks soft enough ta bounce back from anythin’.” He was smiling, trying to disarm the feeling of growing tension. One look at Honey’s eyes told him he was wrong.

“Nah. The other big mare.” Honey briefly wondered why she needed to make the clarification, why he hadn’t immediately made the connection. Maybe, being outside the harem, it was harder for him to really conceptualize the Princesses as sexual beings? Knowing a thing and knowing it were two very different things, after all.

Silver did not concern herself with such philosophical quandaries. Rather, she swallowed convulsively at the look of deadly daring the big mare was shooting her way. She would.

Jona had finally stopped laughing, sensing the seriousness of the situation. Her gaze darted between the two concubines. One looked like her head was on the chopping block and the other looking proud to have put it there. She thought back to the harem, running the roster over in her mind. Which mare was bigger than Honey or Surprise? And which mare would make Silver’s body temperature drop so low? She knew that there were only five concubines. Honey would have told her if there were more. She told her herd everything. Well, almost everything. On the night she’d first been accepted as an applicant, Honey’d said that there were certain things that she wasn’t allowed to say, things that were meant to stay private.

Jona then felt her body tense as the pieces finally came together. She remembered what those secret things were about. She realized who this big mare was. A part of her was ready to shout, to chastise her thick headed love for breaking what seemed like such an important rule. But that’s when the context of the conversation clicked. Those things Honey had been saying had added up to something… something truly dreadful. If Jona was right, which she hoped she wasn’t, it meant that Silver had been a very naughty mare.

Honey held her head high, her posture as regal as Silver’s had been not long ago. Her eyes sparked with a vengeful flame that threatened to consume the entire house.

She is, Silver realized, her heart sunk. She braced herself. The words would be bad enough, but it was the aftermath that she truly feared. All that time, all that training she’d gone through to do the things she’d done; Jona and Plow had none of it. They were regular ponies, as she had once been, as her family still was. They saw the Princesses as just that: Princesses, alicorns, and goddesses. One did not do the kinds of things Silver had done to a goddess. How badly would they think of her once the truth came out?

“It was her idea, ya know,” Honey began. “That big mare that don’t need to be named.”

Silver pursed her dry lips. At least the rule wouldn’t be broken, technically.

“Ya shoulda seen her, bent over on her elbows ‘n’ everythin’. She was…” Honey paused to fan herself. “Woo! She was smokin’ is what she was. Jus’ those two luscious orbs hangin’ out there like… Well, Ah don’t really no,” she laughed. “But trust me when Ah say they’re like the best pillows ah ever slept on. ‘N’ Ah’ll fight anypony who says otherwise.” She surveyed the room with a mighty stink eye, daring any to challenge this truth. Then she offered a “Sorry,” to Plow, who stared back in silent awe.

Silver might have offered the obvious counterargument, but she was too busy contemplating the doom of her good standing with this lovely family.

“It was all Ah could do ta not run up ‘n’ hug ‘em. Maybe try fallin’ asleep right then ‘n’ there.” Honey hummed longingly as she spread her arms to engulf the coveted mass, imagining herself giving the grand orbs their proper reverence with a steady stream of nuzzles. “Hmm. Soft,” she mimed squeezing, “but jus’ firm enough. Like nothin’ ya ever felt ‘efore.”

Plow stared in rapped attention at his mare. He’d caught onto what she was talking about and had already formed a picture in his mind. There was nothing wrong with that, though. He’d gone into book stores, read the paper, and picked up the occasional magazine. He’d never set out to look for such pictures, which would have earned his bottom a fierce battering if his folks ever found out. He’d been raised to honor those that, apparently, weren’t being named. Rather, the pictures had found him, irreverently scattered about as they were. He had eyes, so there’d been no harm in stealing a peak, or two, or six. As such, there was absolutely no reason for him to feel guilty as he used those pictures as a reference for his lifelike and detailed mental image.

Jona watched dumbfounded as Honey spread her arms wide, groping the imaginary ‘pillows’ that weren’t actually imaginary. She knew she should stop this. Honey knew better than to start. And yet the words died in the yellow mare’s throat. This was terribly disrespectful, what the big mare was doing. But why? Jona couldn’t quite answer that. In any other circumstances with any other pony, Honey talking like this would be perfectly harmless. But with this pony and this context? It surely exemplified everything that was wrong with city life. Their families had warned that city life would make them decadent and disrespectful of tradition. Even if was mostly in gest, Jona feared that Honey and the herd had already been contaminated. As lead mare, she had a responsibility to look after her herd, to guard their moral integrity, to put a stop to this right here and now. So why wasn’t she? Why was she hanging on Honey’s every blasphemous word, and why was she getting all tingly down there?

Honey finally let her arms rest, looking mighty pleased with herself for enthralling her audience like this. “So there she was, bent over, her mighty moon almost glowin’ as it rose over the horizon.” Her hands waved in awe. “She looks back over shoulder at her.” Her eyes fixed on Silver, causing the others to do the same. “She wiggles that thing all come-hither-like, her teats swayin’ as she does,” Honey rocked her body to mimic the described movement, her own teats swaying almost hypnotically, “‘n’ she gives this sexy li’l wink.”

Silver made a low mewling sound deep in her throat. Her hands wrapped around herself, partially to warm herself up, and partially to cover her shamefully erect nipples. The memory was all too real. And although there were a few things Honey had left out, or maybe could have better described, the bat mare couldn’t bring herself to voice such criticisms.

“‘N’ Ah thought Silver’d jus’ do the sensible thing ‘n’ hug ‘em. Ah really did. The others, well, they was busy with… other things,” she trailed off, briefly averting her gaze. She might have been out for revenge and skirting the rules, but she knew better than to cross the line. There was no need to bring innocents into this. “But Ah saw it. From where Ah was, Ah got a good look at that mare when it took her.”

“What did?” The words left Jona’s mouth before she’d even realized they were hers.

“The hunger,” Honey beamed. “Ah don’t know why, but it was like the mare’d suddenly got herself possessed by a starved dog. ‘N’ with,” she paused to check her wording, “the big mare shakin’ those big sacks o’ meat in her face, well…” She gave a shrug. “Ah guess it wasn’t that surprisin’ what she did.” Then, with the shit-eatingest of shit-eating grins, Honey opened her mouth just so, fully exposing her pearly whites, and closed her mouth with a mighty click. And then, as her audience all gasped in horror, she decided to be a total ass and click her teeth twice more.

Silver buried her face into her hands and screamed.

“You didn’t?” Jona asked, horrified.

Silver just screamed into her hands again, if a bit more softly.

“You did.” Plow’s words were more of a statement than a question.

“I thought she wanted it!” Silver declared. “We were talking about it just before and… You heard it.” She pointed to Honey. “You heard what she was saying. Obviously she was dropping hints, so don’t make me out to be the bad guy.”

For a moment, Honey was a little worried. A serious question like this wouldn’t abide an answer that was anything short of the truth. But the truth would exonerate Silver of her guilt, which would completely defeat the purpose of everything that had been said thus far. If Honey lied, even if her herd didn’t find out, then she’d be the one feeling guilty. However, feeling a spark of creativity that she was most proud of, she found a loophole. “If’n ya say so.”

“Don’t you give me that!” Silver jumped to her hooves, only to spread her wings and fly right up to Honey’s face. “You even said from the start that it was her idea.”

Honey blinked at the hovering mare. “Ah did?”

“You most certainly did,” Silver announced victoriously. “It was all her idea.”

“Yeah? But who was the one that done it?”

Silver’s flight faltered and she almost fell.

“Ya can’t say ya’ll was ordered, ‘cause it was jus’ hints ‘n’ stuff,” Honey countered, going back on the offense. “She implied things. Ya’ll were the one that attacked her.”

But before the two could get any further into a shouting match, a much quieter voice made itself heard over the ruckus. “Is… is this what ya’ll do in the harem all night?”

Honey and Silver turned to face Jona, brought back down to reality and too dumbstruck to know how to respond. More mindful of herself, Honey also became aware of a thing poking at her inner thigh. She swore internally for not anticipating this. Etiquette demanded that she hide her stallion’s indecency from their guest, but she swore further at her inability to do so from such an awkward position.

“Ah can’t even imagine,” Jona trailed off, staring absently down at her hooves. “Ah always knew ya’ll did stuff, even weird stuff, but never that… Ah don’t even know if ‘weird’ is a strong enough word.”

“She wanted it,” Silver stated. She dropped down to the floor, feeling that flapping wings might distract from the importance of her words. Pushing aside her fears and embarrassment, she stared steadfast back at Jona, her pride as a concubine on the line. “I do not say that as an excuse, but as a fact. L-” She stopped herself. “She needs us. She has a… There’s no getting around this. An insatiable appetite. She has needs that we,” she motioned back to Honey, “are charged with meeting. And sometimes,” her cheeks reddened as she explained, “that requires a level of… experimentation.”

Looking up, Jona just nodded absently as the bat mare finished saying her piece. “So ya bit her?”

Silver pursed her lips, swallowed, and then said, “Yes.”

“‘Cause ya’ll were experimentin’?”

“We were.”

After several seconds of agonizing silence, Jona heaved a long and powerful sigh. It was the sound of exasperation, of a mare who was not mentally prepared to deal with this kind of crap. “‘N’ here Ah thought stallion mouths was the worst of it.”

“Actually,” Silver replied, “that is rather tame compared to our other activities. Activities, I will say right now, that only she is allowed to tell you about.” She looked back at Honey and gave an expression that brokered no argument.

Honey, having a good idea of what Silver was likely talking about, nodded.

“What d’ya mean she’ll tell us?” Plow asked, finding his voice.

Honey chuckled. “Ah thought Ah told ya. If she asks, a concubine’s herd can be invited to join.” Regaining a bit of her earlier confidence, she elaborated. “Then ya’ll won’t need ta jus’ imagine what she looks like all bent over-eep!” She almost jumped out of her seat, only to turn a stern glare upon he who had so carelessly poked her.

Plow just glared back, the rightness of innocence bolstering his conviction. “Its yer own fault fer gettin’ me worked up.” He then slapped a hand down on her flank. “Don’t deny it.”

As the pair had their little standoff, Jona let out a quiet little giggle. “That was a lot more intense than Ah was expectin’.”

“Sorry,” Silver said. “This sort of thing happens a lot in the harem. I guess you could call it our workplace culture.”

“It’s weird.”

“I cannot argue that.”

Silver’s deadpan gave Jona a snorting laugh. She stood and said, “How ‘bout you ‘n’ Ah go find ourselves a seat. Lunch’s been cookin’ ‘n’ we should give Plow a chance ta calm down ‘efore we eat.”

“That would be appreciated,” the stallion deadpanned, still locked eyes with Honey. “Shame more mares don’t know how ta treat a stallion proper like.”

Silver started giggling and turned to follow Jona to the dining room. “Even I know how that’s going to end.” The two took their seats, with Silver making sure her back was to the living area. She did the polite thing and pretended not to notice when she heard the pair move about, absconding to parts unseen to take care of recently risen issues. “So, how do you like Canterlot?”

Honey and Plow eventually returned, smelling of soap and with damp spots on their fur where they’d recently washed, and served lunch. The lasagna was placed in the center of the table, allowing everypony to reach across and take as much as they wanted. It was food made by earth ponies with primarily earth ponies in mind, so it went without saying that the food was plentiful, delicious, and that failure to consume until one’s gut was swollen was not an option. Conversation turned to more casual topics, such as turns in the market, current events, and other miscellaneous issues.

“Yer a fine mare,” Jona stated, slapping Silver’s shoulder while her other hand rested on her expanded stomach. “Don’t let no pony tell ya otherwise.”

Silver, feeling that she’d earned the right, slapped Jona’s shoulder right back. “Likewise. No matter what Honey says.”

The big mare choked on her beverage, almost performing a perfect spit take before she covered her spewing lips.

Jona laughed, more at the display than the joke. The rest of lunch passed uneventfully. It wasn’t until Jona had to leave for her work that everypony agreed that it was time to go. Silver shared long and warm embraces with the members of Honey’s herd, agreeing that they needed to meet up more often.

“Ah think Ah’ll walk ya back home.”

Silver looked up at the tall mare. “Really? But I thought you had tonight off.”

“Technically, but its good manners ta see a friend home, ‘specially if the friend is all tiny.”

Silver’s eyes narrowed. “I assume your vow of vengeance is still in effect?”

“You bet yer sweet plot it is,” Honey affirmed jovially. “Don’t worry, though. Ah ain’t gonna hogtie ya ‘n’ leave ya in a dumpster somewhere.”

“I was not worried… until just now.”

Honey shook her head, a warm smile upon her lips. “Nothin’ bad like that. Justice will be served, but it’ll be fair, so don’t get yer nickers in a knot.”

Silver very nearly made a crass remark about Honey knotting her nickers, but didn’t want to give the big mare any ideas. “Well, I appreciate the offer. Thank you.”

The pair waved their goodbyes and began the journey back to the castle. They walked hand-in-hand, taking in the sights as they moved at a casual pace.

“Your family was simply delightful,” Silver beamed. “I admit I’m a little jealous of what you have to come home to.”

“Ah don’t blame ya. Sure as shootin’ beats a room full o’ pinups, plushies, ‘n’ that thing ya keep in yer drawer.”

“Says the mare with a stack of comics taller than she is.”

“It’s actually mostly manga, but touché.”

“But in all seriousness, I’m envious of the family you have,” Silver said with a hint of sadness. “I had never put much thought into having a herd of my own. There was always something else that needed my attention, but I had always assumed that having my own herd would be inevitable.” She licked her dry lips.

“Well that’s dumb,” Honey blurted. “Ya can’t jus’ except that kind o’ thing to jus’ happen. Ya gotta look fer it. Ya gotta work fer it. Ya gotta trudge through the mud ‘n’ find the ponies ya were meant ta be with. That don’t jus’ happen.”

“Surprisingly insightful words, coming from you.”

“Hey. Us Apples ain’t the oldest clan in Equestria fer nothin’. We got the wisdom o’ ages on our side.”

“Oh. Does this wisdom have anything else to share?”

“It says if’n ya say anythin’ about this ta Jona, you’ll be drownin’ in suiters ‘efore the next sunup.” Her tone was deadly serious.

Silver chuckled. “And now I’m wondering if that is worth the risk. Although I suppose I’m glad for the option. Thank you.”

“Eh. Don’t mention it. We’re in a kind o’ herd, right? Lookin’ out fer each other jus’ comes with the territory.”

“That is very magnanimous of you,” Silver said appreciatively. “It almost makes me feel bad for what I’m about to say.”

A wary eyebrow made the mighty climb up Honey’s forehead, her eyes alight with warning. “Ya’ll about ta say somethin’ stupid?”

“Not at all,” Silver assured, flexing her wings to be ready for a swift getaway. “Simply a passing observation that I wish to share.”

While seemingly impossible at first, Honey’s brow climbed even higher, almost touching her mane line. “Ah know yer gonna say somethin’ ta piss me off, but yer so cocky about it Ah’m gettin’ curious. So go ahead.”

“It was just a little thing, really. A fleeting thought that I very nearly forgot about.” She tittered like a filly. It was very fake. “Earlier, back when everypony was laughing at your expense, I got to thinking.”

“Here it comes,” Honey muttered, cracking her knuckles. They weren’t too far from the house just yet. If she grabbed the little trouble maker, she could run her back home, throw her on the bed, and tickle her until she either surrendered or peed herself. If the latter, she’d make the mare wash the sheets in atonement for her terrible crime. Honey smirked at her own deviousness, anxiously waiting for Silver to give her an excuse.

Silver gets a taste of Honey’s family life and finds it to her liking, setting up a possible character arc for later. If there was one thing that I’m especially pleased with in this chapter, it would be how I drew things out to establish tension. Tension is something I’ve always struggled with even noticing in other works, let alone my own, but I think I did pretty decent this time around.

Tier 1: None at this time
Tier 2: Jake Nelson and Magetsu88
Tier 3: Drake565