Chapter 4: Sometimes I Want to Be Punished

The next morning, Twilight was in the middle of writing the letter to Princess Celestia about Spike being sent away when she heard a knocking at the door. It was just as well, as Twilight was having difficulty explaining Spike’s situation in the letter. I might as well take a break. She opened the door and saw a very anxious Fluttershy standing at the threshold.

“Fluttershy, what a surprise!” Twilight said. “You usually don’t stop by unannounced.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Fluttershy sputtered, “is this a bad time?”

“Not at all!” Twilight said. “Make yourself at home.” Fluttershy trotted in and awkwardly sat down in a spare cushion on the floor. She kept glancing around the library, looking at the titles of books, and her right foreleg was twitching nervously. Twilight was used to Fluttershy’s discomfort, but this was a bit much even for her.

“Is something bothering you?” Twilight asked, taking a seat across from Fluttershy.

“No. Well, yes, a little bit, but it’s…I don’t know…” Fluttershy let out a small squeak. Twilight couldn’t help but smile.

“It looks like something’s up,” Twilight said. “You know that it’s okay to tell me anything. I’m here for you whenever you need help.”

“Thanks, Twilight, I appreciate it,” Fluttershy said, “but this is a very, um…personal problem…” Twilight was starting to feel concerned for her friend.

“How personal…?” Twilight asked. Fluttershy sighed.

“Well, I was talking to Rarity yesterday about…” Fluttershy muttered something that Twilight couldn’t hear, recalling the first time she had introduced herself. Fluttershy huffed with impatience; she knew that it had been far easier to explain this to Rarity, who had impeccable tact. She was also aware that she had known Twilight for much less time.

“About what, Fluttershy?” Twilight probed.

This was so much easier with alcohol… Fluttershy thought. True, she hadn’t had that much at the slumber party, but it had helped her inhibitions and she was a bit of a lightweight.

“Fluttershy, I’m really starting to worry here…” Twilight said.

“Oh, this is stupid,” Fluttershy said. “I was talking to Rarity about sex and how I’m so uncomfortable with my own desires. She suggested that I go to you.”

“Really? Why me?” Twilight asked. Fluttershy wavered; this wasn’t the reaction for which she had been hoping.

“Well…” Fluttershy stalled. How did Rarity word it? “Rarity said that, um, the others were more comfortable with their feelings but…well, thought that with your reluctance to make friends that you’d feel…less comfortable, and might be able to understand how I’m feeling.”

“Oh,” Twilight said, not sure if she should be flattered or miffed at Rarity’s suggestion. “Well, on an analytical level, I knew my feelings were perfectly natural, but something about them made me feel…I don’t know…wrong.”

“Like you were a bad pony?” Fluttershy asked.

“Sort of…” Twilight said, “like I really shouldn’t be enjoying myself as much as I was.”

“Oh,” Fluttershy said, slowly realizing it was becoming easier to talk to Twilight. “Sometimes, when I finish, you know…clopping, I feel like I should be punished.”

“Why would you want to be punished, Fluttershy?”

“Well, some ponies think sex is a sin, you know, and they think it’s wrong to make yourself feel that way, that it should only come after marriage.”

“Yeah, I see what you mean, but why worry about what everypony else thinks? It’s your body; you should be able to use it how you see fit.”

“See, at some level I know that,” Fluttershy said, “but on a deeper level I feel really wrong about the whole thing. Sometimes I imagine myself getting caught and being punished by somepony else.”

“Oh,” Twilight said, honestly unable to relate to such imaginings. “That’s never really occurred to me before. I’ve always felt a little wrong, but I usually just shrug it off.” Fluttershy sighed. Will nopony understand how I feel?

“I shouldn’t have brought it up…” Fluttershy said, trying to make herself smaller by withdrawing her legs.

“No, it’s fine,” Twilight said. “Some ponies just feel that way sometimes.”

“I was hoping you’d understand,” Fluttershy said.

“Fluttershy, I don’t know exactly how you feel, but that doesn’t really matter. Talking things out always helps resolve problems. Remember how you got caught up in modeling and didn’t learn till later that Rarity wanted you to quit? If you had talked things out, you could have avoided a lot of trouble.”

“That’s true…” Fluttershy said.

“So whatever you’re feeling, you don’t have to worry about my ability to understand. Just let it out in the open and we can see if we can figure out your problem.”

“All right,” Fluttershy said, her stomach appropriately fluttering for some indiscernible reason. “Well, it’s not just the fact that I imagine being punished for being a bad pony…”

“What do you mean?” Twilight asked. Fluttershy leaned closer. Twilight took the cue and leaned towards Fluttershy, placing her ear near her mouth. Fluttershy then spoke in the softest audible whisper.

“Sometimes I want to be punished.” Fluttershy drew away, giddy and embarrassed for revealing something she hadn’t even been truly aware of herself. Twilight unwillingly flushed at the revelation, but she remained undeterred.

“You must think I’m really weird…” Fluttershy said, misinterpreting Twilight’s reaction. “I mean, what pony in their right mind wants to be punished?”

“Fluttershy, it’s okay!” Twilight said, relief washing over her as her intellect took over. “I actually have a book about that.” Twilight used her horn to levitate a book off of a shelf that was otherwise out of reach. Once it landed at Fluttershy’s hooves, Fluttershy read the title of the book out loud.

“Pleasure in Pain: Understanding the Concepts of BDSM,” Fluttershy said. “What’s BDSM?” she asked Twilight.

“It stands for a few things,” Twilight said. “It’s an amalgamation of three abbreviations. BD refers to bondage and discipline, DS is dominance and submission, and SM is sadism and masochism.” Fluttershy stared blankly at Twilight, conveying that her explanation had only confused her more. Twilight chuckled.

“Let me elaborate further,” she said. “Bondage and discipline are when ponies allow themselves to be restrained or ‘punished’ for certain ‘behaviors.’ Sometimes a pony will allow her legs to be tied up, restricting her movements.”

“Oh my…” Fluttershy said, imagining herself in that position and shivering with a nervous excitement that terrified her.

“Dominance and submission are when one pony establishes control over another. Fluttershy, forgive me, but I would say you would be submissive.”

“Probably,” Fluttershy said, still thinking about ropes constricting her to a bed.

“And then sadism and masochism refer to sexual desires to give and receive pain, respectively.”

“Really?” Fluttershy asked, imagining a stallion lording over her with a whip before snapping herself out of it.

“So read it in your spare time,” Twilight said, “and see if it helps explains some of your thoughts. There's nothing wrong with you, Fluttershy. Some ponies just like things like this.”

“Thanks, Twilight. I certainly will read it when I can.”

“No worries, Fluttershy,” Twilight said. “I have to get back to writing this letter.”

“Oh, okay,” Fluttershy said cheerily. “Um…can I borrow something to carry this in? Only I don’t want to be seen carrying it around…”

“Oh, of course, Fluttershy! You can borrow one of my saddle packs.” Twilight levitated a saddle pack to Fluttershy, who put the book inside of it and placed the pack on her back.

“Thanks, Twilight! See you later!”

“Bye!” Twilight called as Fluttershy headed for the door, looking decidedly less nervous than she had when she entered.

***

Applejack, true to her word as always, had remained quite busy on the farm again today. She had finished the plowing now and was watching the sun set over the rolling pastures of the apple orchard, a sight she always made a point to see at the end of each day. The evening breeze played beautifully in her mane and cooled her as she chewed on some wheat. Were it not for the mosquitos, she would have considered lying under the stars and sleeping outside tonight.

Thinking about the work she needed to do tomorrow, Applejack saw a rainbow-colored streak soar past, and she suddenly remembered something she needed to ask her.

“Rainbow Dash!” Applejack cried at the top of her lungs, the wheat dropping into the grass. The streak stopped short before approaching the ground where Applejack reclined. Soon the features of the mare producing the streak became clearer, and Rainbow Dash finally touched down next to Applejack, rustling her wings.

“What’s up, AJ?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I’m sorry fer interruptin’ ya, RD. Ya looked like you were in a hurry. But ah forgot to ask ya if the rain was gonna pass by Sweet Apple Acres tomorrow.”

“Applejack, I already told you too much about that,” Rainbow Dash said. “If I were to tell you to expect rain tomorrow, and my boss were to find out, I could be in a lot of trouble.” Rainbow Dash winked at Applejack, who got the message.

“Ah won’t ask then, RD. Sorry fer troublin’ ya.”

“No problem. I was just on my way home, anyway, and I figured I’d scout out my route tomorrow. What were you up to?”

“Just doin’ my daily ritual of watchin’ the sunset. Care to join me for a spell?”

“Um…sure!” Rainbow Dash said, and she lied down next to Applejack facing the setting sun. The golden rays of light made the trees look austere, almost regal. Above the sun, glimpses of the night sky were beginning to form like ribbons around the sun’s perimeter.

“Gosh,” Applejack said, “Celestia can sure work her magic, can’t she?”

“You bet,” Rainbow Dash said. Something about this moment, lying next to Applejack, made her squirm. This scared her a little bit, but she was so relaxed right now that she decided to ignore it.

“Still bothered ’bout that thing you won’t tell me about?” Applejack asked.

“Oh, well…yeah,” Rainbow Dash said.

“Me too,” Applejack said. “I was plowin’ the fields all afternoon, and that’s dead borin’, so mah mind had all kinds of time to think about mah troubles.”

“I hear you,” Rainbow Dash said.

“Say, RD, have ya ever done somethin’ yer family wasn’t too proud of?”

“Huh?” Rainbow Dash asked, jarred by the sudden shift in conversation.

“Ah mean did ya ever git in trouble fer somethin’ ya did that disappointed ’em?”

You have no idea… Rainbow Dash thought to herself, but she had rarely discussed her family with anyone except Fluttershy and she felt uncomfortable starting to divulge her complicated home life.

“I suppose so,” Rainbow Dash said.

“How did ya work it out?” Applejack asked, trying not to sound too eager.

“Um, well…I didn’t,” Rainbow Dash conceded, realizing her hesitation had given it away anyway.

“Oh,” Applejack said, looking outright dejected. “That’s too bad…”

“Whatever, it’s in the past now,” Rainbow Dash said in an attempt to shrug it off. “Why do you ask? Did you do something wrong?”

“Well…not exactly…” Applejack said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Rainbow Dash asked.

It’s not what ah’ve done, RD, but part of who ah am that might be the problem…

“Ah mean that ah haven’t really done anythin’ wrong, but well…in case ah do, ah was just wonderin’ how to work it out.”

“Are you thinking about doing something wrong?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Applejack squirmed. This was becoming more and more awkward by the second.

“No…” she finally said.

“Then what made you ask?”

“Um…well, the summer harvest is always a bit stressful fer the Apple Family, and we’re bound to get at each other’s throats every once in a while.”

“Yeah, but it usually gets better, doesn’t it?”

“Ah reckon so. But this year’s been an awful slow season fer us, so we’re already worked up as it is…”

“I had no idea, Applejack. I’m sorry.”

“Weren’t your fault, Rainbow Dash. Just…some more rain in the middle of April woulda been nice. That drought did a number on our tomato plants.”

“Hey, I don’t make the forecasts, I just carry them out.”

“Well…thanks anyway, RD.”

“For what? I didn’t answer your question.”

“Nah, but it’s fine. Ah reckon ah should get some shut-eye. Sounds like ah’ve got a lot of work to do tomorrow.”

“All right then. See you later, AJ.” Rainbow Dash took off, puzzled by her friend’s unusual query. Applejack started trotting back to the farmhouse, desperate to understand what had her so worked up.

***

Fluttershy was trotting home, Twilight’s book in tow, when all of a sudden Pinkie Pie, who was bounding about recklessly, crashed into her. While dusting themselves off, Fluttershy realized that the saddle pack had fallen off of her back, which meant that―

“Ooh, what’s this?” Pinkie Pie asked, pointing at the book that was lying cover-down in the dirt. Fluttershy panicked, but was too slow to object as Pinkie Pie swiped the book off of the ground and looked at the title. Pinkie Pie let out a loud gasp. Fluttershy was grateful that nopony else was outside to overhear them.

“Did you borrow this from Twilight?” Pinkie Pie asked.

“Um…not really,” Fluttershy lied. “I mean, I checked it out for a friend who was too embarrassed to ask for it.”

“Really? Who?” Pinkie Pie asked.

Fluttershy mumbled softly, but then decided that thinking up a name was childish. She was a mare, after all, and she thought it rather foalish to be so embarrassed.

“Just kidding, it’s for me…” Fluttershy said. A second gasp from Pinkie Pie made Fluttershy cringe.

“Wow, Fluttershy, I didn’t know you were interested in naughty pony playtime, too!” Pinkie Pie said.

“Naughty…” Fluttershy mused, but then snapped to understanding. “What do you mean, ‘too’?”

“Well, it’s kinda always been a fantasy of mine to get a little…rowdy…when I’m with somepony else.”

“Really?” Fluttershy asked, confused.

“Yeah, silly! Pinkie doesn’t mind a little rough-and-tumble action! It makes it more…I don’t know, exciting!”

“I guess so,” Fluttershy said, growing ever more embarrassed as the conversation continued.

“Why don’t you come on up to my apartment?” Pinkie Pie asked. “I’m off today, and I want to read about this with you.”

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea…” Fluttershy muttered. Pinkie Pie realized the awkward nature of the suggestion.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Fluttershy. I don’t want to embarrass you. It’s just…I don’t know, I’ve always had these super-secret thoughts and I always thought there was something wrong with me for having them so I didn’t tell anypony about them but then I saw that you had that book which I didn’t even know existed up until now and that made me realize that it’s okay to have these thoughts because one of my best friends has them, too, and I guess I got carried away because I wanted to share that with you because everything’s better with friends but sometimes that’s not always true and I’m sorry I probably shouldn’t have even said anything I mean look at you you’re blushing so much right now and―”

“It’s okay, Pinkie Pie!” Fluttershy said, her voice louder than normal, which brought Pinkie Pie’s yammering to a sudden stop. “I always thought it was wrong, too, but I talked to Twilight about it and she said it was okay…”

“Twilight’s such a nice pony!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “She doesn’t judge anypony. I wish everypony else could be more like her.”

“What do you mean?” Fluttershy asked.

“Well…some ponies would probably think what you’re reading is bad! But those ponies don’t know any better.”

“I guess you’re right…” Fluttershy said. There was some silence between the two friends.

“Well, I guess I’d better let you go home and start reading. Here,” Pinkie Pie said, placing the book back in the saddle pack and kindly putting the pack back on Fluttershy’s back.

“Thanks, Pinkie Pie,” Fluttershy said. “I’m so happy you understand.”

“No problem, Fluttershy!” Pinkie Pie said, bounding away as energetic as she had been before. Fluttershy spent the rest of the trip home being careful where she trotted.

***

Perhaps it was the summer heat. Perhaps it was a result of the slumber party. Perhaps it was this stallion’s positively rippling thighs. But as Rarity took the measurements of her client, she kept catching her mind drifting to some titillating thoughts about what this stallion could do to her, nay, what she would beg him to do to her.

This isn’t proper, Rarity! she scolded herself. Stop it this instant! You’re a consummate professional, this is strictly business. Oh, dear Celestia, look at that dock… Rarity measured the stallion’s backside with utmost precision, mostly to extend the amount of time she could spend with her hooves so close to it. Reluctantly, she moved to the stallion’s croup, cursing herself again. The stallion just stood there politely, noticing the slight flush in Rarity’s cheeks but tactfully staying mute about it.

“Well, I’ve taken down all the measurements,” Rarity said, turning away from the stallion, as she feared talking directly to him would be too difficult. “I believe I can have your tuxedo ready by the end of the week. I can usually turn it around much faster but I’m in the middle of a massive order that’s due in two days, and I’m afraid I won’t be able to get started on your order until I’ve finished that up.”

“That’s quite all right, Rarity,” the stallion said, and the soothing sound of his baritone voice made Rarity tremble.

“All right, I shall expect payment upon receipt of the tuxedo. You may stop by to pick it up on Friday after three o’clock.”

“Three o’clock, got it,” the stallion said. “Thank you kindly, Rarity. I’m sure it’ll look stunning.”

“Oh, there’s no need for flattery, my dear. I’m only doing my job.”

Oh my God he said my design will be stunning he must think so highly of me oh I would gladly except other forms of payment― Rarity caught her thoughts flying away from her and giggled softly before showing the gentlecolt the door. She returned to her massive order, stitching together a dress for one of the Canterlot ponies for a prestigious party. Rarity had so much practice as a seamstress that the work was second-nature to her now, and her idle mind kept wandering back to that hunk of a stallion.

Oh, Rarity, this is positively unladylike! Having desires is one thing, but letting yourself get carried away like this is disgraceful. Still, it has been a while since I…oh, what am I thinking! I’m in the middle of a very important order and I even stop to consider clopping. But good lord did he have gorgeous thighs… Rarity let out a groan of frustration.

“What’s wrong, big sis?” Sweetie Belle said, unknowingly having picked the most inopportune time to trot past Rarity’s workroom. She usually wasn’t in the store, but their parents were vacationing for the rest of the week and had left her in Rarity’s charge.

“Nothing, dear, the fabric just got caught in the needle.”

“Okay,” Sweetie Belle said. “Hey, that last customer you had coming in here was real handsome, don’t you think?” Rarity froze, panic settling in even when she knew there was no reason for it.

“Oh, Sweetie Belle, I look at a customer and all I see are his individual body parts. I think of them merely as the vehicles for my clothes, nothing more.” Sweetie Belle gave her sister a skeptical look. Rarity swallowed nervously.

“And I thought I was uncomfortable about noticing boys…” she said.

“Sweetie Belle, really, you don’t have to be so brash.”

“And you don’t have to be so wound up all the time, big sis! I saw the way you were looking at him. I know you liked him. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.” Rarity shook her head in disbelief. Was she really being lectured by her little sister?

“I am not wound up, I did not like that stallion, and you shouldn’t be peeping at my customers while I’m taking their measurements. It might make them feel uncomfortable.” Sweetie Belle was put off by Rarity’s tone and took a turn for the nasty.

“Well, not nearly as uncomfortable as if he saw you trying to look at his penis while measuring his inseam…” Rarity let out an offended huff.

“I will not tolerate such vulgarities! You are still only a filly. Why, I have half a mind to wash your mouth out with soap.”

“Oh come on, Rarity, I was just kidding. You really do need to lighten up…” Sweetie Belle trotted away, smirking. Though they got along far better than they used to, Sweetie Belle still took a little sadistic enjoyment at aggravating her big sister. Flustered, Rarity found it more and more difficult to concentrate on her work. Finally, she gave up and decided to give in to her needs briefly, hoping to clear them away so she could focus better on her work.

Using her magic, she shut and locked the door and closed the blinds before sprawling out in a rather undignified position and lowering her hoof to her groin. She closed her eyes and imagined her customer picking up his tuxedo, flustered at having forgotten his money. She pictured him lamenting his mistake and wondering if there was some other method of payment he could offer.

Well, there is one thing you could do…

He was upon her, hooves firmly planted on her thighs, thrusting into her rump as his penis penetrated her vagina and rubbed up against her clitoris. Though she didn’t know the feeling, Rarity imagined the delightful sensation stimulating her clitoris as she rubbed it with her hoof. As she became more and more heated, she began to stroke her horn with her other hoof and it started to glow as it responded to her touch. Rarity gasped as her strokes became more fervent. Her strokes became gasps and her gasps outright moans as she felt herself close to climaxing. When she imagined her customer crouched beneath her, licking her clitoris, she was hit by a wave of ecstasy and felt her hoof become slightly damp with her fluids.

Rarity lay on the floor, cooling off from her climax, and her ecstasy was drowned by a wave of shame. She was usually so composed, so dignified. Rarely if ever had she imagined becoming intimate with any stallion, and she couldn’t understand why she was so heated. She thought back to kissing Applejack and realized that ordinarily she would never consent to try anything so raunchy. But this heat, this inexplicable heat inside her had developed a craving that was becoming more and more difficult to feed on her own.

Rarity finally rose and levitated over some tissues to clean herself up. The self-treatment had been pleasant, to be sure, but she felt herself strongly desiring for somepony else to touch her that way. She returned to her work in dismay, fearing that that pony would never come.

***

Twilight, having finished her letter to Celestia, was casually reading a sultry novel about the love affair of a prince with a commoner. She usually wouldn’t be caught dead reading such literary trash, but for the time being she wanted to shut off her mind. As she lay on the bed levitating the book above her, she imagined taking the role of the mare in the novel, wooing the handsome prince with her good looks and clever flirtation.

Twilight had a hand mirror on her nightstand. She levitated it next to the book and took a look at her face. She sighed, noting the bags under her eyes that indicated she wasn’t getting enough sleep. She thought they made her face look droopy. She was also critical of her mane, which in her opinion was much too straight. She wished she could have Rarity’s mane with its elegant swoops. She wouldn’t even mind sharing the rest of Rarity’s body features. Twilight mused about her friend and remarked to herself that she was quite attractive. Twilight looked at her face and sighed.

An idea struck her, and Twilight cast a spell to reposition her mane to look like Rarity’s. She remembered the time when her mane had commonly formed the same shape, and Spike’s reaction to it. She chuckled, thinking that she had caught the eye of someone, only to grimace at the thought that it was her assistant dragon.

Across the room, Owlowiscious hooted at Twilight. She glanced over at the owl and sighed.

“Do you think I’m ugly, Owlowiscious?” she asked. The owl, with its uncanny ability to understand conversation, shook his head emphatically.

“Well, how come nopony notices me?” Twilight asked. Owlowiscious hooted, pointing his wing at the shelf of books. Twilight stared at the bookshelf confused, but then realized the message.

“I suppose I do read a lot,” Twilight said. “It’s just that for so long I lived my life without friends, and I guess I’m still not used to socializing.”

“Who are you talking to?” Spike asked, suddenly coming into the room. Spike looked around and noticed the owl on his perch.

“Oh, it’s just you, Owlowiscious,” Spike said. “Wait, Twilight, why are you talking to an owl?”

“It’s nothing, Spike,” Twilight said.

“And why does your mane look like…?” Spike started to ask, but as he stared at the shape in a trance he lost his train of speech. Twilight laughed and cast a spell to return her mane to its normal shape. Spike snapped out of his trance.

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly.

“It’s fine,” Twilight said, chuckling still. “Hey, Spike, you think Rarity’s attractive, right?”

Spike gave her a deadpan stare. “You’re seriously asking me that?”

“Right, never mind,” Twilight said. “Well, how come…? Oh, forget it.”

“Forget what, Twilight?” Spike asked, concerned about his friend.

“It’s nothing, Spike,” Twilight said.

“Uh-huh, sure,” Spike said, walking over to the bed and jumping on next to Twilight.

“Whatcha reading?” Spike saw the cover of the book and snickered. The title was A Royal Affair.

“Are you serious, Twilight? Why are you reading that smut?” Spike asked.

“Oh, can’t you just leave me alone, Spike?” Twilight huffed, now becoming impatient.

“Well, something’s clearly bothering you, and as your faithful assistant, I won’t let you face your troubles alone. Is it about Rarity?”

“Yes, well…no, not really, it’s just…she’s so much prettier than me and I guess I’m jealous. I see the stallions give her a second glance as they pass by and I want a stallion to look at me that way and it never happens.” Spike shook his head, realizing the triviality of Twilight’s problem and correcting her.

“Twilight, you don’t see it because the stallions only look at you after you’ve passed them. Are you really that oblivious?”

“Have you been reading my dictionary again?” Twilight asked, sneering.

“Presumably,” Spike answered. “My point is, even though you don’t attract the same attention that Rarity does―and come on, who are we kidding, she’s gorgeous―most stallions don’t find you hideous, either.”

“Well, I wish one of them would say something…”

“Twilight, think about it. You’re the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria! You saved the world from Nightmare Moon and Discord! You’re Princess Celestia’s favorite student! It takes guts for the other ponies in Ponyville to even say hi to you!”

“You really think so?” Twilight asked, considering her position for the first time.

“Well, duh! Come on, Twilight, do you really think you’re ugly? I mean, you’re no Rarity, but you certainly aren’t Derpy Hooves.”

“Don’t say that about Derpy, Spike. Somepony could take it the wrong way.”

“That’s not the point. The point is you need to consider why you think you’re so unattractive! Don’t you see?” Twilight thought about this. True, logically she would be a prime catch for any stallion. But inside her heart she just could not bring herself to say so with strong conviction.

“I just don’t know, Spike…” she said, smiling sheepishly. Spike put his face in his hand and shook his head.

“Well, I can’t make you believe anything, Twilight. You’ll just have to see for yourself.” With that, Spike leapt off the bed and left Twilight alone. Twilight, though touched by Spike’s attempt to help, could not accept what he was saying as true and could not understand why. She returned to her book and tried to push her troubles out of her mind.