“Owww… Guys be careful, theres a random oiled section!” I heard Luke say from down the hall a few minutes later.

I smirk and mutter, “Giggity.”

Flynn was quietly snickering.

Pecila smacked Max on the back of the head. “No. No talk of sex around the children.”

“I HEARD THAT AND I’M NO CHILD!” Luke shouted down the hallway.

I rubbed the back of my head. ”If I was going to, I would’ve said I want Flynn’s d-” I was interrupted by another smack.

“Excuse me!” Flynn’s face immediately turned red at what Max said.

“I was talking about Repede, not you!” Pecila yelled back before hitting Max again.

“Awoo?” Repede tilted his head in confusion.

“And leave Flynn alone, she’s had enough to worry about over the past thousand years!”

I look back at Flynn, interest evident on my face. “So you’ve had your gender swapped as well?”

“As well?” Flynn look to Max, still blushing.

“Yeah, I used to be a guy.” I gave him my best bedroom eyes, “Looks like we’re-”

Pecila grabbed Max and pushed her away. “No. Don’t hit on my friend.”

Flynn was about as red as a tomato and was actually left speechless. He opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, unsure on how to respond.

I scoffed, “Fine, I’ll leave your studs alone.”

“They are not ‘studs’, they are human freaking beings you sexist ass!” Pecila snapped.

“Okay. But you haven’t denied that they’re yours~!”

Luke had stopped at an open doorway, and looked to the group when he heard Max say that “...Oh god why.”

“... Before you leave, I will hurt you.” Pecila spoke up. “I don’t care if it’s physically or mentally, I will hurt you.”

“OKAY. Now before Max decides to say ‘kinky’ lets go explore this new room!” Luke said as he sprinted into it.

Flynn gave a small noise, following Luke at a rather slow pace. The male looked confused, shocked and a bit distress. Repede whined at this, worried that his owner might be broken.

Pecila hugged Flynn, rubbing his back. “It will be okay. The mean lady won’t touch you while I’m around to kick her ass.”

I rolled my eyes. “I wasn’t going to unless he asked me to,” I said as I jumped to the ceiling again.

Pecila just looked up to glare at me.

Luke waited for the others to catch up to him, mainly because there was a robotic arm holding him in the air by his tail “...So, anyone care to help?”

Flynn moved in the direction Luke was in after hugging Pecila. He moved to where he heard Luke’s voice before stopping when he saw the male. “.....How?”

I slowly reloaded my gun, being careful not to agitate my wound.

“Don’t ask me, because I seriously don’t know. I also don’t know why my bag is defying gravity either.” Luke said gesturing to the upside-down bag which didn’t seem to have anything falling out of it.

I aimed carefully, “Try to get him to hold you up higher, I can almost-”

Sigrun just rushed in and slashed at the arm, damaging it. “Or we could do that.” Sigrun remarked.

Luke fell when the arm released his tail and landed on his face “Why does everything cause me pain?”

“Cause the world hates you?” Flynn asked.

I opened up on the robot’s face, tearing through the metal and clay in a shower of bullets.

Sigrun grabbed Luke and jumped away. “Stay back.”

Once the clip was empty I reloaded again and trained my sights on it once again, holding my fire. “Man, fifty bullets and it still isn’t down?”

“Thats because you’re shooting a decoration.” Luke said as he pointed at where it was on the wall.

“.... I knew that.” I said as I looked anywhere but up.

“Sure ya’ did.” Luke said as he dusted himself off.

Sigrun facepalmed. Flynn shook his head slightly.

Pecila put her finger to her lips, trying to listen.

Thump thump thump-

“Footsteps?” Pecila questioned.

I turned to our right, kneeling down as I did so. “I hear them too....”

Pecila put a hand on her scythe, tensing up.

Something appeared in the doorway no one had been in. It appeared to be human but it was covered in thick golem-ish armor. It was also dragging a huge stone sword.

“...What is this? Skyrim?” Luke asked as he drew his sword and revolver again.

“I’ll distract it! You guys try to destroy it,” I said as I started to shoot.

“At this point, it could very well be,” Flynn replied, pulling out his sword.

My bullets did nothing more than bounce off.

“Lets see... thick armor, large sword, bipedal machine… Aim for the knee joints to stop movement and aim for the wrists to prevent it from using its weapon.” Luke said, shooting a few Ice Bolts out of the revolver at the machine’s wrists “Man I love this thing!”

“Yeah. I’m just going to focus on the knee joints. Last thing I want to worry about is that thing dropping its sword,” Flynn muttered slightly before closing his eyes. He didn’t make any more to attack the being.

I focused my fire on the thing’s head and neck, making it lift an arm to try to protect itself. “This feels like Shadow of the Colossus to me.” I said as I reloaded.

The humanoid groaned as the attacks hit it before it started lifting the sword, cracks appearing on it.

“Really? You’re not getting the Dwemer Ruins vibe from this place?” Luke asked with a raised brow.

“I am, I just- Whoa!” I’m interrupted by the giant sword carving a line straight towards me. I’m not fast enough and cry out in pain as my leg gets shortened about seven inches.

“Holy hell! Your leg! The hell are we going to fix that?!” Luke shouted, jumping out of the way of the blade.

Pecila redirected the blade with her scythe, gabbing a key with her free hand. “Kotonoha, I call upon you! Heal Max!” Sigrun disappeared, only to be replace by a very foxy lady.

The floating fox lady went to Max, grabbing the cut off limb and using her magic to reattach it. “That will be 200 gold coins~”

“....O divine spear..” Flynn said quietly, having quickly moved to avoid the blade. What looked like a glyph formed underneath the creature. Spears composed of what looks like light appeared above the blond.

“Thanks, though I don’t have any money,” I say as I stand back up.

“Well it’s good thing it’s not ObamaCare isn’t it Max?” Luke asked with a slight snort, firing another Ice Bolt at the cracks on the chestplate, hitting it and having ice form in the cracks, expanding as it was created.

The humanoid suddenly roared out, like it was in pain.

“That doesn’t sound like a construct. That sounds a LOT like a living creature.” Luke said as he strode forward and slammed the blunt part of his scimitar against the chestplate as hard as he could.

It got knocked back, the chestplate breaking off to reveal sparkling dark red fur.

“... We made a mistake, didn’t we?” I said as I saw the fur.

“Mainly you. That chestplate was made of granite, you’re lucky your bullets didn’t penetrate it. I listed ways to stop it if it was a construct, not lethal ways.” Luke said as he walked over to the furred creature, pulling the helmet off to reveal a cat-like head and face with a bit of fear showing in it’s wide eyes.

“I know what my bullets can and can’t get through. I knew I wouldn’t be more than annoying.”

“...” Flynn suddenly frowned before the magical glyph underneath the creature vanished. The male turned away from the others and placed his sword in his sheathe.

“Guys, we should probably still get the sword away from him or her.” Pecila pointed out. “I mean, what if she attacks in fear.”

“Going out on a limb and saying that, also visual guess here, that SHE retaliated because she was attacked first,” Luke said, gesturing to the female “Though you’re right about the sword…” Luke said as he bent down to pick it up.

Yet again, Flynn didn’t respond. He simply listened to the others in silence.

Pecila cautiously walked over to Flynn. “We’ll talk about later, ‘kay?”

Yet again, Flynn didn’t respond. He simply glared in the direction of the wall, grumbling something about a wasted arte.

Pecila rubbed Flynn’s back. Flynn, however, moved away.

“Why don’t we try talking to her?” I asked.

“Jesus… Christ… This is a damn heavy sword…!” Luke grunted as he picked it up and dragged it away, dropped it, and returned to the female with a sigh “Fair point Max.” He crouched down in front of her “If you can understand me nod once”

The cat blinked before one of it’s paws started glowing.

Luke groaned and stood, backing up a bit, “I’m going to assume you understand me but just don’t like us or trust us?”

There was a flash throughout the chamber. “Working now?” The cat asked in scratchy English.

“Yes, it is. So, uh, sorry for attacking you without much reason.” Luke said to the cat, glaring at Max a tiny bit.

I gave a sheepish smile, “Yeah, sorry about that.... Everything else had tried to kill us, so I just assumed you would as well.“

“So far the only things that tried to kill us were mechanical spiders with elemental cores. The robotic arm had just picked me up by my tail for some reason,” Luke said with a slight frown.

“Kinda weird since dungeons like this usually have more enemies.” Pecila muttered.

“You’ve jinxed us again. Thanks for that,” Luke said with a slight groan as he looked back to the cat “So, I doubt that you’re living here, and that there’s a reason for you to be here.”

“Yes, there was reason.” The cat said in scratchy English. “Disease on surface. Many dead.”

I jump and smack Pecila on the back of her head. “Seriously need to stop that.” I land and say, ”You just invited Murphy and his law in.”

“No, No, you’ve got it wrong, Murphy IS the law in this world, Max.” Luke said with a groan.

“I wondered where his book had gone.”

Pecila rubbed her own head. “I was just pointing something out.”

“What did the disease do?” Flynn replied, ignoring the other three as he look to the cat. “And you came here to avoid the disease?”

“Not only one. Others came. Scientists and Civilians.” The cat replied. “Disease cause death and insanity.”

“Oh, so you’re not alone?” Flynn questioned.

“Not when asleep. My pod only one safe.” The cat looked to the floor.

Luke looked to the cat with sorrow in his eyes “...Thats terrible, where did the disease come from?”

“No cat knows. Just appeared. No affect Dogs. Only cats affected.”

“I’m sorry for disturbing this place, none of us knew what it really was, but to make up for what we’ve done, would you like to come with us?” Luke asked, looking to the cat.

“No. Must find others. Must be alone.”

“But why must you be alone? Surely having people help you would be a great boon in your search,” Luke said as he sat in front of her.

“Maybe because of the fact she doesn’t exactly trust you,” Flynn muttered under his breath as Repede poke his head out of his bag.

“Or there’s secrets she wants to hide.” Pecila pointed out.

“I still say it’s more so my reason,” Flynn grumbled slightly.

“We no trust outsiders.” the cat said, standing up.

Luke’s ear twitched when Flynn had said that, showing he had heard what Flynn had said “Any particular reason why?”

“Either way, this is starting to get above my paygrade,” I said as I put away my gun.

“Bye, Max.” Pecila waved to her. “The contract is fulfilled. You can leave.”

Flynn simply just muttered something to himself, returning his gaze to the wall.

I waved as I sank into my portal.

Luke stood from sitting in front of the cat and turned to Max “Goodbye Max, may you be free from the laws of Murphy~”

I called out just before the portal closed, “Make sure Pecila isn’t too rough in bed you two~!”

“What the hell?!” Luke shouted.

“Damn it!” Flynn growled.

“I WILL MURDER HER!” I heard Pecila say as the cat's laughter followed me.

Author's Notes:

Yep, had to do that innuendo. Just had to.

Posting now because I haven't heard that I couldn't yet. I'll still try to do one chapter a day, but no promises on that.