I woke up with a killer headache and felt physically drained, everything ached and hurt, which lead to it took a while for me to properly wake up, rubbing my eyes and yawning a lot followed by the daily stretches that took way too long to be healthy for someone of my age. I still hadn’t quite gotten used to waking up in a strange place, after being taken from my home to Canterlot, and Canterlot to Ponyville I didn’t feel at home, but that would take months or years for me to feel normal in Equestria. I took some time to look around the room, my sword was now in the corner of the room, leaning against a corner, there were a couple bookshelves in here, none of which I could read. I would make a mental note to get Twilight to teach me Equestrian, just so I could read something. If I was staying here for a while then it would mean I’d have to do something to not go batshit insane. Though honestly I’ll just spend my time pissing Diamond off or something along those lines.
It took me a while, a lot longer than I’d have liked it to, but I did eventually notice Diamond and Spike standing in my room looking at me stretch and yawn. Celestia still wins with seeing me at my most unattractive.

“You what?” I grunted, staring at Spike, he had what looked to be a rolled up yellow-cream bit of paper. Spike looked confused for a moment and it was Diamond who answered.

“We have new orders.” He muttered. I had to rethink what he said in my still dazed state, but eventually I heard what he said. I slowly nodded, not sure how to feel about Celestia giving me orders. Sure gives me something to do but with the whole Timberwolves/Nightmare Moon incident, I would’ve figured Celestia noticed I couldn’t fight for shit. Well that was due to not having any sort of weapon or protection, now I’ve got God Killer or whatever the fuck that sword was called.

“Alright let’s hear them.” I said, nodding again. Spike began to unroll what I found out to be a parchment and began to read:

‘To Defender of Harmony, Aron; I brought you here on the premise that the Wild Magic inside of you would either disperse back into the Equestrian atmosphere with the rest of our stolen magic, or, it would stay inside of you and become inactive. Either way, the rift between Equestria and your world should have closed. However, this is not the case. The rift is still showing signs of activity and seems to have no intention of slowing or closing. You will still have to remain in Equestria and at present time it is best for you to stay in Ponyville where I know where you are for easiest access. You are always welcome in Canterlot and I will make sure a room is always ready for you if you wish to visit the capital. Your friend Diamond has also received a letter on him also staying in Ponyville with you to give you some companionship. If you do wish to leave Ponyville and Canterlot you are free to do so, I wish to put as much trust into you as you have with me. That said, please tell me the next time you find a dangerous artefact, and tell me if you intend to go travelling. Princess Celestia.’

There was silence for a bit, I just had nothing to say, thought about it and the logic worked. Was allowed to do as I please and Diamond was here to keep tabs on me to make sure I didn’t burn Ponyville down or some shit. What I didn’t understand was the last bit, it felt forced. Like it had been added last minute. She obviously meant the sword, so my guess what that Twilight had told Celestia about it just as she was writing the main bulk of the letter. But if Twilight was troubled enough by the sword, why give it back? And why didn’t Celestia want to take it off me, probably something to do with the whole trust thing.

“So I guess we are stuck in Ponyville.” Diamond finally muttered. I nodded, and Spike just stood switching between the two of us to stare at.

“Look at it this way Diamond, no more boring guard duty.” I suggested, Diamond nodded slightly but didn’t seem cheered up.

“Instead it is waiting around in some small town on the edge of one of the most dangerous places in Equestria.” Diamond countered.

“Hey Ponyville is actually fairly big, compared to other towns anyway!” Spike cried. “And there is plenty to do.” He added.

“Name one town that is smaller than Ponyville.” Diamond said.

“Ponyton.” Spike replied. I took over from here.

“Ponyton, Ponyville. Did you just name all your towns Pony-puns?” I asked, voice raised slightly. Spike looked lost again but Diamond laughed slightly.

“Besides Canterlot, yes. Manehatten, Las Pegasus, Fillydelphia, I think the only other place I can think of is Cloudsdale. And that’s got Cloud in the name!” Diamond said, he began to sound more and more desperate with each town he listed and started muttering to himself various other towns and cities. Many I recognised from America.
After a time I just got out of bed and walked over to him and began to pat his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry Diamond, you deserved to have not been born a pony. You would have made a great human.” I muttered. Diamond nodded and stopped naming locations. He looked like he was about to cry.

"I am okay." He muttered, I smiled and nodded.

"It's not much better on Earth honestly, we don't name our towns human based puns. But we have some weird shit, there is a place called Eye nearby where I live, lived. It probably wasn't pronounced Eye, but fuck it, it's how I pronounced it." I said after a pause. "Also a place called Disappointment, I wonder if I was born there, can't remember where it is, not in England as far as I know."

"Why say that?" Spike asked.

"Say what?" I asked.

"You were born in Disappointment?" He replied, figures.

"I put myself down a lot, too much, I barely register when I do now." I muttered.

"Well you shouldn't. It's not healthy." Spike said, yeah he was trying to be helpful and maybe I should think about what he was saying, hell maybe I should-.

"Eat a dick Spike." I said. He looked slightly hurt but I doubt he knew what I meant, not that I did mean it. "A lot of things I do are unhealthy, I'm surprised I've survived this long."

"You are a pretty depressing stallion Aron." Diamond muttered. "When you are not cracking jokes and swearing." He added.

"Ninety percent of my life has been in and out of depression dude." I muttered. "Anyway, what we doing today?" I asked quickly.

"Well what is there to do? You have been told to fuck around in Ponyville until Princess Celestia gives further orders and I am to accompany you. She said to tell her if you intend to travel, so we should take that to the effect of something more towards; we can go between Canterlot and Ponyville at any time. Anywhere else is most likely off limits. Unless Twilight Sparkle wishes to take us anywhere." Diamond replied.

"Alright cool. Spike, what can we do in Ponyville besides hide in a fucking library all day. As much as I'd love nothing more than to stay indoors all day, I don't have my laptop so I'm fucked for stuff to do. What do you suggest?" I replied, then looked to Spike to ask the question. He thought about it for a moment before beginning to reply.

"Well Twilight has gone to help Applejack with the harvest, I was going to help but I asked if I could stay and help you find your way around the library when you woke up. I don't know much of Ponyville since Twilight makes me do chores all the time so I don't get out much. We can go explore, see what there is to see I guess." Spike replied, I nodded slightly and laughed.

"So you didn't want to help Twilight and Applejack and skipped out on being used as free labour?" I asked. Spike laughed a little bit and nodded.

"Something like that. So, exploring?" Spike said. I nodded and began to get up. Spike fucked off somewhere into the main room but Diamond decided to stay and watch me get dressed. It was a bit creepy but I really didn't care too much, I put on a blue top with the words 'Sarcastic comment loading please wait'. I found it pretty funny every time I wore it. It was short sleeved so I was a bit concerned about what the weather was going to be like but so far it seemed pretty humid here so even if it was cold, it still would be warm enough to not bitch about it being cold. Or at least, that's what I understood from humidity. I could be wrong.

"What is loading?" Diamond asked.

"It's a human term, we have a much higher technology level than Equestria and use stuff like computers, basically a book but they can hold much more and you can watch videos, moving images, I won't go too much into it cus I'd have to explain a lot more than just loading. But it basically means when something takes too long to happen the computer will 'load' so if I want to read a book on the computer when I go to said book it will take time to load up, time is lengthened or shortened depending on how good a computer is. Obviously you won't understand much of that sentence, it's a human term, and it means I take a while to think up a funny reply sometimes." I replied, Diamond just nodded. Spike came back in randomly with what looked like a cut emerald in his hand. A large bite mark was in it.

"You guys ready?" He asked, I nodded and Diamond picked up his spear and put it on. Using his wings to lift the saddle up and onto his back like an extra arm.

"Hey Diamond." I muttered.

"Yes?" He asked.

"During the Timberwolf attack, where we nearly died." I said.

"Yes." He grunted.

"Why the fuck didn't you use your wings to GET AWAY FROM THE FUCKERS!" I said, beginning to shout. Diamond didn't even flinch.

"Because then I would not be protecting you, as Defender of Harmony-" Diamond began.

"Temporary." I muttered.

"As Defender of Harmony, you were, are, the highest priority, I had to protect you. Flying away would not have helped you survive." Diamond continued.

"You're a prick, now I have a weapon I don't need any help." I said.

"Do you have much training in combat?" Diamond asked.

"I shot myself with a crossbow once." I muttered, then lifted my arm, showing off a large, deep scar that started at my hand all the way down to my elbow. "This was from when I was fighting in a re-enactment and decided to block a not-so-blunt-sword with my arm. Rather than the weapon I had been given." I added. Pointing at the scar.

"I still need to protect you then, and you should go through at least basic combat training." Diamond replied.

"Is the training program pony focused? Solely pony focused?" I asked. Diamond didn't answer. "I'll pass." I added after a long pause.

"You will need some sort of training Aron, you cannot just go around with a deadly weapon." Diamond argued.

"Well when you find me some human training then I'll train. Speaking of, are there any races like me?" I asked. Diamond looked confused for a second and looked at Spike who shrugged.

"From the proclaimed 'only human on Equestria' that's a pretty dumb question Aron." Spike muttered.

"I meant, creatures that walk on two legs. I'd say you're one of them but you're a fucking dragon, unless lore really is completely off compared to Earth legends, and if it is, ignore everyone I told you about dragons, if not; then dragons walk around on four legs. Eventually." I snapped.

"Oh, I see." Diamond quietly grumbled. "Well there are Minotaurs, Nāga; although they do not really use legs, more snake-like. Ahuizotl, Centaurs are fairly you-like; though those are incredibly rare. Miss Twilight might know more than me being a unicorn." Diamond added eventually.

"Alright cool, I'll ask her when we're back." I said quickly.

"Speaking of which...” Spike began. I smiled and began to walk to the door, the other two followed. I stopped at the door.

"The fuck am I doing leading, Spike get your ass in front of me, you're the one leading this trip. You know it better than me and Diamond." I declared, Spike quickly ran in front of us and opened the door to another bright summer day. The heat instantly rushed inside and the room felt so much warmer. "The fuck was that?" I asked. Spike turned around to look at me, obviously confused.

"What was what?" He asked.

"Temperature changed drastically." I replied, glaring at him.

"Oh right, Twilight has a permanent-spell over the library so the temperature is constantly the same." Spike replied, he paused after the oh right part, I guess so he could remember whatever the fuck it was Twilight had done.

"The same spell is used in many Equestrian buildings, as long as there are enough unicorns to maintain it." Diamond added.

"Oh really?" I asked. "What about the castle? That wasn't too different to outside, and most of the windows were open." I added. Smiling slightly.

"The castle does not have any temperature controlling spells in place unless it's winter. And since the Pegasi control the weather it is never too cold or harsh. Besides Hearth's Warming Eve and the days prior and after." Diamond replied quickly.

"You're a cunt Diamond. What about the bar we went too?" I asked.

"They turn the heating system at night, unicorns drunk can become interesting, so magic levels are lowered as much as possible. There are still, accidents. But a lot less when they can't leech off active spells as much." Diamond replied.

"Fucking magic. So unicorns cast spells when drunk? That sounds dangerous yet awesome." I muttered.

"You are sadistic Aron. But no they don't cast spells like you would see unicorns cast spells normally. Instead their magic goes somewhat wild. It tries to connect to active spells, so if a sober unicorn cast a spell, the drunk one would leech onto it. Meaning that if it is an offensive spell of any sort. The drunk unicorn could be in danger of getting burned. There are protections in place that unicorns have by default so they do not get too damaged, but it is still possible for a unicorn to get hurt badly." Diamond replied.

"Oh I see. Not as awesome then." I said. Spike was still standing at the doorway awkwardly. "How come you know so much about unicorns Diamond? You're a winged fucker."

"I am a royal guard, we have to be somewhat educated." Diamond said, staring at me blankly. Bastard.

"Good shout. Alright Spike where we going?" I muttered, looking at the baby dragon. He thought about it for a while before smiling slightly and nodding.

"Well there is apparently a bar near Sugarcube Corner. We can go there first, there really isn't much to do in Ponyville, unless you want to go explore the Everfree Forest?" Spike said. I looked to Diamond who stared blankly.

"Aright. Bar first. Then you can shove the Everfree idea up your ass. The Everfree Forest is fucking terrifying. Diamond nearly died, and I got some cursed sword." I replied quickly. "Then we just explore I guess because fuck it."

"You nearly died?" Spike asked, looking at Diamond.

"We were all in danger, not just me. I just happened to be the one in the front lines." Diamond grunted.

"I would've helped ya if you'd given me a fucking weapons." I muttered.

"Yes but you have a weapon now and as much as you clearly hate it. You are a high ranking officer, at least temporarily. So it is my job and duty to protect you." Diamond grunted. I'd pulled a heart string there a little bit. I felt bad.

"Alright good point. Let's just fucking go before anyone gets salty." I said.

"Salty?" Spike asked. Oh here we go.

"Means pissed off, annoyed, angry. All of that bullocks." I replied sharply, Spike nodded and walked outside a little bit more. Diamond and I quickly followed.

Again we basically just wondered around Ponyville for a while. I didn't see Twilight or the others all that much which was good. Twilight because she'd ratted me out to Celestia, the others because none of them I particularly liked. Applejack was alright. But I was terrified of saying y'all in front of her by accident. Well Rainbow was cool as well. I wanted to hang with her a little bit but didn't realise at the time how fucking obsessed with flying she was. Spike walked us towards some weird building that looked like a cake. Which honestly was pretty clever. There were even three chimney things that looked like candles. Spike slowed down a little bit when we got close, but I wasn't really sure why for a time.

"What's up Spike?" I asked. He turned to look at me, he was so confused.

"Can't remember where this bar is. Vinyl Scratch was talking to me about it a couple days ago saying it was nearby but Twilight didn't let me go so I don't actually know where it is." Spike muttered. Oh for fuck's sake.

"Damn it Spike. Just ask some random pony." I replied.

"Who would tell Twilight and I'd get into trouble." Spike said. Don't worry Spike, you weren't coming out with Diamond and I anyway. Because then I'd get into shit.

"Fine I fucking will." I replied, searching for some random horse to talk to. This could be fun. I found some very purple pony wondering around seemingly aimlessly wearing a saddle bag with three diamonds on it. Matching the ponies ass tattoo. It looked like a mix between Rainbow Dash and Twilight. I began to wonder over to it, Diamond on my flank (no pun intended). The pony quickly noticed me and looked absolutely terrified, she didn't run but did take a step back.

"Sup." I muttered, good start. The pony looked confused for a second before muttering a response.

"H-Hello?" The pony asked, looking around, she looked slightly less scared when she noticed Spike and Diamond beside me, but still looked pretty nervous.

"Hey, do you know where the bar is?" I asked.

"B-bar?" The pony asked.

"Yeah, apparently there's a bar somewhere in Ponyville but we dunno where it is."

"Oh, oh the bar. Yeah I know where that is." She muttered, and continued to stand completely still, staring up at me.

"Are you going to direct us there?" I heard Diamond mutter behind me. I pony blinked a couple of times and nodded.

"Yes, yes of course. I can just take you there if you wish." The pony muttered. "Oh, I'm Amethyst Star by the way." She added.

"Aright cool, I'm Aron, this is Diamond; he's a dick, and I presume you know Spike but he's a dick too honestly." I replied.

"Oh... Okay." Amethyst muttered. Diamond snorted slightly, but neither Spike nor Diamond said anything. Amethyst started to walk into town, we all followed the purple unicorn into town, ponies kept looking at us, well; me. I was used to stares on Earth and here it wasn't so different; besides the fact they were ponies not humans.
We started walking toward what I presumed was the town hall; the building had somehow been repaired from the destruction during the Nightmare Moon incident. I didn't question it, though Diamond did look pretty confused at the building but he didn't mention anything either. We walked around the building and came to a stairwell dipping into the ground.

"Wait what? The bar is underground?" I asked, looking down at the stairs, there was a black door at the end that looked really out of place in somewhere like Ponyville, well, just having something that looked like a shitty red light district was out of place.

"Err... Yes it is. Just under town hall. Ponyville is a peaceful little town and not many ponies thought we needed a bar, but tourists like it." Amethyst muttered.

"Y'all get many tourists?" I asked.

"Not really, a few come from Ponyton or Canterlot sometimes but the bar is usually empty. Filthy Rich was tempted to close it a while back but after seeing how he wasn't actually losing money on leaving it here he just left it."

"So what about the bartender. Don't he need a pay?"

"She, and she does but the bar is used just enough to pay her and get either a balanced pay or just brings in a profit. It wasn't Filthy's best investment but it’s part of our town now."

"Aright cheers. Dee we can come back here tonight if you want." The named guard glared at me for a second and raised a hoof and touched around where his black eye had been.

"I will pass for tonight. Is it not it a drinkers rule to skip a night to recover?"

"Alright. I'm not gonna complain about that. Least we know where the place is now. Though I've no fucking idea if that's a rule or not. I just drink because I'm an alcoholic."

"That's not very healthy Aron." Spike informed me. Looking genuinely concerned.

"Dude you shouldda seen the state I was in when Sunbutt-" Diamond coughed. "-picked me up. I was, am, in a bad place at the moment. The only reason I haven't had to consider suicide yet is because I was on a time limit this morning and had a killer hangover."

"If I'm not needed." Amethyst suddenly said. I smiled and nodded to her, she trotted off a lot quicker than I would have liked, and I wasn't that scary was I? I blame Diamond. No, Mirrors.

"Also Sir, do not call me 'Dee' you know my name." Diamond muttered after a pause.

"Sos mate. Though if you don't knock the sir shit off I’ll keep calling you it. Fucker."

"Understood. Aron."

"Outstanding." Diamond paused a lot longer than he should of before saying my name. "Anyway, we found the bar. Now what the fuck do we do?" I asked, looking to Spike.

"Well, err. We could go see if Rarity is in?" Spike suggested.

"The fuck is Rarity?" I asked.

"One of the Element of Harmony bearers Aron, the white unicorn." Diamond muttered.

"Oh right, the marshmallow looking one. Alright. We are not going to see her, I had to put up with her shit when Twilight dragged me to see all her butt buddies before the whole Nightmare Moon shit went down. Though I would like to meet a couple of the others though. Rainbow Dash seemed alright, bit of a bitch though, kinda reminds me of a girl from college but whatevs. Applejack could be cool too. Though my inappropriate use of 'y'all' might piss her off. Is there anyone that would be fun to meet? My social skills seem to be a lot better here than they were on Earth, either due to my mind refusing to believe this is real or that magic is effecting me or something I’ll never know."

"Do you like music?" Spike asked.

"When it suits me. I go to bars a lot so there is usually utter trash that cunts call music playing. But sometimes it’s good." I replied. The dragon nodded and started walking off.

"I think Vinyl Scratch and Octavia are in town if you want to meet them. They are basically the town musicians but they travel a lot on tours and to various clubs. Usually Manehatten. Or Canterlot."

"Alright cool. They famous?"

"Yeah I suppose. Vinyl has more, street cred I suppose, known a lot in clubs and bars, Octavia is the more famous of the pair. She gets invited to high end parties and the like."

"If Twilight Sparkle does not allow you into bars and parties like that of which this Vinyl Scratch likes. How come you know so much about them?" Diamond asked.

"I talk to Octavia a bit, whenever I'm not doing chores for Twilight or she is away. Plus Pinkie Pie knows them both and mentions them whenever she throws a Pinkie Party."

"You don't talk to Vinyl much then? Just you only mentioned talking to Tavi?" I asked.

"You could say that. Vinyl has made a rather mutual agreement with everypony." Spike relied.

"What?" I asked, somewhat stunned.

"She doesn't talk to anypony. I can’t remember the science side of it but you'll see when we get there." Spike said causally. Walking towards a lone house that looked pretty fucked up.
One half of the thing was light purple with various shades and shapes of different purples and dark blues, the hay roof was a darker shade than the other houses in Ponyville as well. The other half was brown and honestly looked pretty standard, the hay was lighter and there was a chimney on the brown side that looked like pipes from some old organ. When I say half and half it was completely true. There wasn't a single strand of dark hay on the light side and vice versa and even the fucking door was half purple and half brown. It was a pretty kick-ass house honestly. But at the same time was glad Twilights tree was far away from this structure.

"Well, here we are. Sounds like they're in." Spike said, waving a claw to cover the whole building in an arc that would only really work from his point of view. True enough I could hear a mumble of music coming from the home, I couldn't make anything out but it sounded, calming.
We got to the doorway and I honestly wasn't sure what to do. Knocking would be a start but would knocking on a different side of the door cause something to happen. Would they even know I was knocking with the music on? Why was I even here? If I moved to a new town on Earth I wouldn't go knocking on random peoples doors in a hopes of making friends. Well I could pull the whole 'new neighbour' card but they would most likely see through the bullshit. Me being an alien here and all.
After a few seconds the music dimmed down a little but didn't completely stop, almost like one half of a duo stopped which honestly made sense considering there were two of them living together. The door swung open and a white unicorn with really awesome blue hair was standing before us. It was wearing some cool purple sunglasses and had what I presume was a highlight in its hair of a brighter blue. This unicorn I wanted to get to know.

"Hey Vinyl. This is Aron, we're wondering around town so he can get to know the ponies of the town, can we come in?" Spike said from behind me. No introduction for Diamond then, fuck you too Spike. The unicorn looked me up and down, smiled and nodded. Then walked inside the house and we followed. Spike first, brushing past me, then me and finally Diamond. Looking around for treats that weren't there.

Vinyl was sitting on some sofa that matched the house, it was smack in the centre of the room. One side of it looked very bright and causal, something I would have if I could afford it, and the other half was much darker and brown. With a pattern on the sides and arms. Something you're grandmother would own. There were a couple doors leading to other rooms and the main room had two sets of musical instruments set up. On the dull side, was a cello and various cello-like accessories dotted around. I'm not that into music so I couldn't begin to describe everything. Basically a school music room if all they did was violin or something like that. The other side was equally as lost to me but looked hella cool. A huge set of speakers with a mixing table and various other fairly high-tech equipment. There was another pony standing around, Octavia I presumed, she was standing on the dull side with her instrument set down against a wall. There wasn't much else to this room besides the music equipment. No paintings or trophies. Though they could all be in other rooms for all I knew. This looked like a pretty big house, though much bigger than what outside had told me. The ponies probably harbour some TARDIS technology or some shit. It wouldn't have surprised me that much.

"Oh hello Spike." Octavia said, oh fuck no. She was British. Plus I didn't describe her; she was a weird shade of grey with very 'high-born' dark brown hair. She had a pink bow on and had a pink butt mark of what I guess is a music thing. Vinyl's was a music symbol as well. But I somewhat recognised hers. "Oh and you must be that alien that came to town a few days ago?" She asked, looking at me, obviously. Mo glance for Diamond again, these ponies are cunts.

"Yep. I'm Aron." I whimpered. Fucking shyness taking over. Bastard.

"You don't talk much do you?" Octavia asked. I shrugged. Then Spike jumped in.

"He just needs to get to know you first, he was pretty shy to me and Twilight when he arrived. He's fine with Dee though." Diamond growled slightly and I glared at Spike too.

"Dee?" Octavia asked, looking at me.

"He means my guard, Diamond. A name Spike should not be saying." I said, still looking at Spike.

"What did I do? You did it?" He grunted back.

"Yes and I'm Diamond's friend. He is a royal guard, a title you should remember and respect." I said. Much angrier than I intended but I respect the forces too much for Spike to think I'm joking.

"Oh does Aron have a special spot for royals? Do you have anywhere you are from?" Octavia asked, Vinyl hadn't said anything and was just chilling watching this all unfold. I was pretty pissed I had gotten pissed off in someone else's house but nobody had commented so I presumed social norms were very different here.

"It’s complicated. I give a lot of respect to those in the forces, so the military. Including guards, I don’t particularly like the royals I had more see a need for them but the people who give their lives to defend another will always have a space in my heart for respect. To me, to get respect you must earn respect. And members of the force have done more than enough. I don’t know if it’s the same here with a standing army but where I come from. We are at war a lot." I said. Octavia looked at me for a moment and then nodded.

"That was rather poetic Aron. Thank you."

"No problem. Now that I'm out of my shell a little I guess we can’t get to know each other if you would like. I dunno if y'all were doing anything important, Spike just suggested I come see you two being the town musicians."

"No no of course. We love having guests over, sometimes we get very focused in our music that we need ponies or remind us to go outside and socialise. We don’t get much time off as I'm sure Spike may have mentioned." Said dragon was currently talking to Diamond who had fucked off into a corner. Vinyl had buggered off somewhere as well.

"Yeah I heard you guys travel a lot."

"Indeed we do." There was an awkward pause before she continued. "So do you like much music Aron?"

"Honestly? Not really. There is some stuff that I could listen to forever but a lot of it I don’t really like and my world is more for the money than the music now so a lot of it is terrible. Again I don’t know much about here but you guys seem to prefer quality over quantity and entertainment over pay."

"Shame, we could demonstrate some pieces if you would like? Whilst you're here that is. If you stay in Ponyville I'm sure you will hear some of our work. Or if you ever go to Canterlot you'll see me a lot. Especially at the Gala." I almost flinched at that pronunciation. 'Garr-Lah'. Nah mate its 'Gah-lah'.

"If you are willing. We aren't busy but you might have plans."

"It wouldn't be a problem. Once Vinyl returns we can begin." Octavia pointed a hoof at the sofa and I took a seat, it was much lower than I'm used to and longer so it gave me an excuse to slouch. Diamond trotted over and took a seat next to me. Trying to copy me but eventually giving up and sitting like a dog would. Spike didn't sit on the sofa, mainly because there weren't any room. He instead sat on the floor.
Vinyl eventually came back in munching on a sandwich but when she saw Octavia standing at her cello she put it down somewhere I didn't see and ran to her mixing board.

"Music battle?" Octavia asked, I saw Vinyl nod with a huge grin on her face. I really wanted those sunglasses of hers but I didn't know her well enough to get away with stealing them temporarily.

"Alright ill start, then you. Then duo?" Octavia asked looking at the unicorn again. There was another nod and they began. Or better yet, Octavia began because they can keep shit organised.

We left probably an hour later. Octavia's music was pretty shit honestly. I really don't care for it that much. Though Vinyl's was a little more upbeat and interesting buy when the two of them were playing together it was amazing. They played one song each and repeated so it took about ten minutes each round I guess. I don’t really know we left when they finished a duo part. They were both pretty cool honestly but I'd love to get to know Vinyl a lot more than Octavia.

"You seemed a lot more polite talking to Octavia Aron." Spike said as we were walking back to Twilight's, there really wasn't much to do and I had gotten up pretty late. I had suggested lunch but Spike wanted to go back to the library for a bit. I didn't care for whatever reason he gave.

"Yeah well Octavia seems pretty 'high-born' or posh or whatever you lot use for rich types. I doubt she would’ve appreciated me swearing constantly and using the slang I do. I can be polite when I want. Well, when it suits me." I replied.

"So why not be polite all the time?" Diamond asked.

"Because fuck that. I prefer calling someone a cunt than saying please and thank you all the fucking time. If I had spoken to Vinyl I would be normal me. She seemed like the kind of chick who would prefer a more laid back style. Why those two live together I’ll never know. I didn't ask but whatevs. I presume they're dating?" I asked, looking at Spike. He just shrugged. "Whatever I don’t care that much. I do like them, Octavia could be cool to talk to when Diamond isn't his ever happy self-" I received a grunt from that "-and Vinyl could be cool to get to know more I’ll have to see. Only time will tell. Any other people I should get to know?"

"Honestly. In Ponyville? Not many others. I guess Twilight's friends but I guess you'll get to know them over time." Spike replied.

"Alright. What food you got at Twilight's?"

"Same as breakfast I guess. If you want something else we'll have to wait until Twilight's home since she doesn't tell me where the bits are kept"

"Probably for good reason Spike. You're a dragon."

"Sir that's racist." Diamond muttered, I somewhat forgot he was with us but he'd been talking to Spike at the music house and now Spike was talking to me. I may be able to multitask somewhat but talking to two or more people isn't one of them. I usually get kicked out of the conversation.

"Though I guess it’s true if what Aron said about dragons from his world is true here." Spike muttered.

"Exactly. I'm honestly looking forward to seeing what other fantasy creatures y'all have. Hopefully with either an army behind me or from the safety of some observation deck. This world don't seem too dangerous but if you guys have dragons that can just be claimed by pretty purple ponies whenever they wish I'm sure the world is darker than it seems."

"We do actually have a zoo with beasts like that. Though I doubt you'll ever see it." Diamond said.

"Why is it a non-civi site?" I asked. Diamond smiled slightly but shook his head.

"No it’s in Manehatten. I used to live there and there really isn't that much to see. It’s basically Canterlot but bigger and louder. I much prefer places like Ponyville and Applelousa."

"I’ve only ever lived in a village. Though even that was bigger than Ponyville. My home had around two thousand people living in it. Though that’s just a guess that I was never corrected upon honestly.” Diamond stared at me for a second before replying. I figured it was due to having so many people living in one place. But instead;

“You speak so clearly, so perfectly sometimes and then you resort back to your slang. Cus and whatevs. Why is that?”

“Bad habit.” I said, way too quickly.

“You sure it is just that? You seem to have developed a lot of things you call bad habits.”

“I’m a bad person I guess.”

“And yet you respect those in military service to the point of defending them against friends.”

“That I do.”

“You will not expand upon this will you?”

“Probably not, least for a while I guess. Gotta keep the mystery ain’t I?”

“I do not understand you humans sometimes.”

“Diamond cut the shit, I’m the only human you know.”

“That is very true.”

“Plus I’m a unique snowflake so the shit I do don’t make no sense to no human neither.” There was a long pause, one I had been hoping for. Eventually Diamond just face palmed. Finally Spike spoke up again.

“Aron that was like; nine negatives?” He muttered. I started to count on my fingers.

“Three Spike, I’m shocked you would miscount like that living with Twilight in a fucking tree-library.”

“I don’t read most of the books in there, usually too busy reorganising them.” He muttered something else which I’m pretty sure had swears in but I wasn’t overly sure. We’d finally reached the tree house so I didn’t ask. Spike was standing next to me when we reached the door and Diamond was similarly just standing awkwardly at me.

“Every time I reach a fucking door won’t it?” I asked myself, moving forward and opening it before stepping inside. Which was, it turns out. The exact wrong thing to do.

“Sir?” Diamond asked almost as soon as we’d walked in. Spike actually screamed, which considering the context and if it were to ever happen to me. I would have the same reaction. There were animals, everywhere. All running around with feather dusters and shit like that, being led by a rather bright yellow pony humming some shitty song I wasn’t familiar with flying around cleaning as well.

“Fluttershy?” I asked, hoping to every god ever I got her name right. From the squeak I received I figured I was right with the -Shy bit anyway. She jumped and nearly stopped flying before recovering and slowly floating down to the ground.

“I was wondering where you had gone Aron, would have been strange if you left without a goodbye.”

“Fluttershy I’ve known you for like two days. Maybe.”

“I know that, but all the fuss about an alien in Ponyville and he just leaves after a couple days.”

“Oh. Right.” I muttered, I barely knew this chick so I was resorting to what I’ll call FlutterAron which is totally not a shipping name.

“Why are you cleaning a public library Miss Fluttershy?” Diamond asked, saving me from me. I was confused when I registered what he had said, public? Then I realised this was a library.

“Well. Erm. Twilight.” She started muttered something which I actually caught.

“What ticket?” I asked, Spike jumped, I guessed from me knowing what she said. For those confused it was “Twilight has a ticket.” I only got more mumbles from that which were.

“To the Gala.”

“Oh not the fucking Gala again!” I yelled. F-Shy jumped at that, as did Spike.

“You understand her?” Diamond muttered.

“Guess it’s cus I’m as shy as she is sometimes, though not as much here weirdly.” Diamond just shrugged.

“Wait if Twilight has a ticket, why are you trying to get it? It’s hers?” Spike muttered after a really awkward pause.

“She has two.”

“Well the second can go to Spike.” I replied, the named dragon flinched.

“I don’t even wanna go.” He muttered. “Much.” He added under his breath.

“Jesus Christ Spike.” I grunted, face palming.

“My name is just Spike, who is Jesus Christ?” He asked.

“Some made up cunt, I’m using his name in vain.” I replied quickly. “The history is unimportant but he was created by an Empire about a thousand years ago in a last ditch effort to unify the world. Known world.”

“You’ll have to explain that in more detail.” Spike muttered, slowly.

“Yeah later. For now though. Fluttershy where is Twilight?” I asked, looking back to the yellow Pegasus, her animals had all but disappeared, somehow.

“I’m not sure, last I saw her she was in the market looking for food.”

“Awesome, that’s what we’re trying to do. See you later Fluttershy.” I said, turning to walk out. Spike pulled on my top.

“You’re just going to leave her here?” He asked.

“Fluttershy is a big pony. I think, and it’s a public fucking library Spike. And I’m starving.” I replied quickly and walked out. Diamond quickly followed, without his spear weirdly. “You not bringing your spear Diamond?” I asked.

“No Aron, we have not had any threats in this town thus far and it is only for lunch.”

“You sure you don’t want to be armed?” I asked carefully.

“No, the only worry close by that I have assessed would be the Everfree but since we are only going for lunch it will not be needed as we are only going into town, the centre as well.” I looked him up and down for a second or two and smiled.

“Sick of carrying it?”

“Aron, since I am not on active guard duty and you now have your own kind of weapon and refuse to accept a guard. Yes, I am fucking sick of carrying that thing around. The spear itself is fine, but eventually the saddle I have to wear for it chaffs and I do not want to deal with that, shit.”

“Aright. Seems fair enough, Spike where would a pony such as Twilight go for food?”

“I dunno where she would eat but she is coming this way now.” Spike said, pointing forward, and just like that, I saw a rather upset looking Twilight walking towards us. I just caught a glance of that Pink pony trying to hide nearby and wanted to leave as soon as possible. She scared me.

“Sup Twilight!” I called, the mare barely looked up.

“Where have you three been?” She asked quietly.

“Vinyl’s. Well, exploring but mainly Vinyl’s.” I replied, she nodded.

“She say much?” Twilight asked. If my theory was right, which I really hoped it wasn’t, that was a bitch move by Twilight just then.

“Nah not really, Octavia says hi though.”

“Anything else?”

“For the past ten or so minutes, looking for fucking food. Spike has no idea where you keep your money, I have no idea where food is, Diamond is a cunt and Fluttershy is cleaning the library.” Twilight paused at that for a second before picking up speed.

“Oh no not Fluttershy as well!” She wailed, running forward, it actually made my jump the way she lunged forward, didn’t look natural. She rushed inside the library leaving us three awkwardly outside, a small gathering of ponies were arriving outside the library, at first I thought it was due to me but I began to pick up whispers of the Gala. Spike quickly entered the library.

“Diamond go get your spear and my sword.” I said quietly, he nodded and joined Spike inside. I crossed my arms and saw Pinkie appear somewhere in the crowd. “Pink one. What’s up?” I asked.

“Hey Aron! Have you heard! Twilight has a ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala.” Pinkie called back, the whispers turned into murmurs and the crowd inched forward. Diamond came back out wearing his spear saddle and my sword under one of his wings. I’m beyond relieved he didn’t carry it in his fucking mouth. I grabbed the sword and swung it around a little, the ponies stopped talking for a second, fixated on the blade.

“That’s what I thought.” I muttered. Pinkie had to ruin it though.

“Silly Aron you wouldn’t use that against ponies.” She said with a smile and ran up to me and hugged me. Stranger danger.

“Bitch. I’ve known you for two days.” I muttered.

“Then we need to have a getting-to-know-each-other-better-party!”

“Yeah sure, can y’all stop upsetting Twilight about those fucking tickets?” I said suddenly. Pinkie jumped back.

“Upsetting her?”

“Yeah, I’ve been pissing about all day so haven’t figured out all the details, and correct me if I’m wrong. But Twilight got a ticket to some Gala thing and now everyone is trying to get it off her?” Pinkie was silent for a lot longer than I was comfortable with, during this I saw the rest of twilight’s friends appear. Weirdly Rainbow Dash was flying next to me instead of standing in the crowd with the rest of them. Obviously Fluttershy was missing but it was close enough.

“Yeah that sounds right! Though she has two tickets!” Pinkie said. Diamond turned and walked inside the library without a word. I wasn’t really sure what to do after that so just looked at Rainbow hoovering next to me.

“Hey Dash. How’s your day been?” I asked.

“Bit weird. Been chasing down Twilight for her Gala ticket.”

“God damn it Rainbow.” I muttered.

“What?”

“Did you not hear me earlier? That shit pissed her off, it’s her choice who the ticket goes to. Why do you even wanna go?”

“The Wonderbolts are going.”

“The fuck is a Wonderbolt?”

“They are a group of Pegasi who perform acrobatics and aerial demonstrations like races and stuff. And one day I’m going to join them!”

“Aright, sounds pretty cool. I’m not into racing that much but I haven’t seen any Pegasi races so could be interesting. Still not a good enough reason to upset Twilight, y’all just made friends with her.”

“I know, I’ll say sorry as soon as I can Aron.” There was a pause for a second before she continued, “Do you know when you’re going to Canterlot next?”

“Not really, apparently I’m allowed to travel to and from Ponyville and Canterlot whenever I want, as long as Diamond is with me, and we wanna go there soon to research my sword. Why, what do you want?”

“Well, could you go to the racing track and get a list of Wonderbolt shows? I’d go but I have work.”

“Hold on now there. You’ve been asleep above my farm all day!” Applejack shouted. I smiled.

“Yeah… But if I’m needed for work I’ll be in Ponyville.” Rainbow replied.

“Meh whatever the reason I’ll see if I can get your list. Though dunno how long I’ll be in Canterlot. Or when.”

“Thanks Aron.” Suddenly Diamond walked out of the library, followed by Twilight and Fluttershy. Diamond was smiling slightly and Twilight was floating nine golden tickets in a purple aura, she seemed considerably more happy and upbeat now. But doing a quick headcount, I very quickly lost any happiness.

“Twilight. Why have you got nine tickets?” I asked slowly.

“Diamond suggested I contacted Celestia about my, problems, with tickets and she sent eight more. One for all of my friends.”

“But there are only six of you?” I asked.

“Don’t be silly Aron, you, Spike and Diamond have a ticket.”

“Diamond is a royal guard, he could just turn up and be allowed in, and I don’t wanna go to some crappy Gala.”

“Yeah but Diamond is guarding you and me currently and isn’t active service. And since I’m going to the Gala he’ll have to come. Or at very least you. Being my bodyguard. Also you’ll love the Gala.”

“You clearly don’t know me do you Twilight?” She just smiled at that, Diamond looked completely neutral at this engagement. I figured deep down he’d always wanted to go without having to stand completely still or some shit. “Ah whatever, at least this drama is cleared up. I’m going to go get lunch. Anyone coming?” I asked.

“I still haven’t eaten, wanted to sort all this out first.” Twilight said, smiling. I nodded.

“Let us go eat then. Also, do you want to go to Canterlot tomorrow Aron?” Diamond asked.

“Yeah sure, got something to do for Rainbow Dash whilst I’m there as well as the sword. Probably stay a couple days if you want.”

“May I accompany you?” Rarity asked suddenly. I looked to her and nodded.

“Yeah sure, will most likely be staying in the castle. Unless Celestia tells us to fuck off.” I said.

“T- the castle?” Rarity asked, overly excited. I ignored it.

“Speaking of which, do you have anywhere else to stay besides the castle?” I asked, looking at Diamond.

“The barracks, obviously. But that’s part of the castle and I used to rent a room with another guard friend who I’m sure wouldn’t mind letting out his house again. I know he has three spare rooms. Rich family, so if the castle is full we can go there most likely.”

“This wouldn’t be Mirrors would it?” I asked, slowly. He just glared at me.

“I said guard friend Aron.”

“Ouch. You don’t think he’ll hunt us down will he?”

“Probably not actively, but if he sees us we will have to deal with running off like we did.”

“Hey, I was sent off. You were the one who ran off.”

“I meant the bar.”

“Oh right, forgot about that.”

Author's Notes:

Since nobody cares anyway. My excuse was being abducted by the Dutch for this chapter taking so long.
I really don't like where this chapter started going but its 2am here and im contemplating killing myself so fuck you anyway